God Damn It!
by awesomeo123
Summary: My life is...ordinary. If the definition of ordinary includes: a brother called Squalo, hallucinations of some other world, a knack for misfortune and an assassination squad in which I now know as 'family'. *sighs*
1. Rebirth

**Okay...I'm not sure if this will work. It's just a random idea I picked out in a really boring class, so bear with me on this... **

**I apologize in advance for grammatical errors, bad spelling and weird use of language. If the characters seem OOC, I will fix it...eventually (by killing off a few people, making up tragic events, etc etc). Romance will occur...eventually.**

**Please enjoy :]**

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><p><span>Chapter 1 - Rebirth<span>

Before that night, my life had been boring. Ordinary if you must; but I would rather be in those shoes than the ones I would be in. If only I had known.

My name is Alexandra Knight. Or was...but that's not the point. I was fifteen, an only child, ranked third in my year (I could've been first if I hadn't been dead last in sport), and currently addicted to Katekyo Hitman Reborn.

"Kateikyoushi Hitman Reborn is epically awesome!" I chanted with a classmate.

"OMG, have you read the new chapter of My Heavenly Judgement?" she rambled, absorbed into the topic.

In response, I tried to do an impersonation of Bel's laugh. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...of course! I can't wait until the next chapter." The rest of our class groaned. They'd had enough of our fangirl squeals, rants and mimics.

"Aren't you over that already?" one whined.

"Shut up..." another advised.

For the rest of the lesson, we discussed who was hotter, cooler, or better. We even got as far onto how much we hated minor characters. Our teacher had long given up on us, and attempted to teach the remaining students. Eventually, the bell rang and we went to our separate classes.

The remainder of the day was very much the same: there was only so much you could learn from the Merchant of Venice. How were a bunch of people who couldn't stop saying 'thou' and 'thy' going to help you in real life?

Come to think of it, school was a stupid idea. Knowing about the 'magical properties' of triangles wasn't helpful at all – nor Henry VIII's numerous wives, for that matter. Seriously, who cares about the past? It's...the past. The future was far more important.

My logic worked like this: On a cold dark night, you're for some reason, alone. In a cliché dark alley. Suddenly, you're getting mugged and this guy says: "Give me you purse!"

And obviously, you'd say something like: "Aaarrrggghhhh! Shylock's anger at Antonio is caused by anti-Semitism and prejudice. Don't kill me!"

And of course the guy would just sit down, look interested and say. "Oh my, that's so interesting! Please tell me more."

No kidding.

And so, one night after countless hours of worshipping KHR fanfiction, I wondered about this.

_School is pointless. It would be so cool if everything was like KHR...mafia and bishies...now that's the life! _Glancing at my alarm clock, I realised it was some ungodly hour in the morning. Inspired by a sudden thought, I made a wish. _I wish I was in KHR!_ And with that, I fell asleep.

What I didn't know, was that at that moment, a wishing star streaked the sky, twinkled then disappeared.

I lost everything. And I was reborn; into the world of Kateikyoushi Hitman Reborn.

* * *

><p>The day of my birth was not meant to be a celebrated day. Firstly, my 'parents' were perfectly happy with their six year old son; Superbi Squalo...or my new brother. I was just an 'accident', if you know what I mean. How this thing worked...well, it was like that whole God thing. I was in KHR, but I wasn't in KHR. Just like how Jesus, God and the Holy Spirit are apparently three and one.<p>

The moment I opened my eyes, both my parents had to agree that they were perhaps...wrong about their initial judgement. My eyes apparently were full of 'tranquillity'. And so, they named me Serena, and kept me; instead of their initial plan of abandoning me at the local orphanage.

That day also happened to Squalo's first day of primary school for Mafioso kids. It was halfway through the school year; but his parents insisted that he would make more of an entrance, thus opening more career opportunities. (A/N: I'm not going to call him Superbi coz that would just sound weird O_o).

He did not have a good day.

He was late – because his Mom conveniently went into labor on the way. Once he reached school, he was yelled at by his teacher and was slapped. When he threw the teacher's stapler and stapled the teacher (later arguing that he was just giving it back), he was sent to the principal's office. The result was a month's worth of 'push up' detention.

When he was finally allowed to return to class, he had missed out on making a macaroni gun; and was left to sing ridiculous mafia nursery rhymes along with the rest of his class. After they were dismissed and he finished his first detention (1000 push ups took a while), nobody came to pick him up – and was left with no option but to walk the long trip home. It was past midnight by the time he returned.

Hence it was expected for him to be in a horrible mood when he slammed open his front door.

"VOI! Why didn't you come to pick me up?" he yelled, looking around the house for his parents.

The Squalo household in truth wasn't very large. Both parents were in fact related to the mafia – his mother a weapons designer and father an informer – internationally wanted by large mafia families and the police. They were barely in their thirties, and very rich. So why the small house? It was easier to keep an eye on things. And it was still comfortable.

He found his father sitting at the kitchen table, drinking from a bottle of whisky. "Superbi...I'm so sorry, I forgot you were at school..." his father apologized.

"You forgot? How could you forget?! It was my first day! And do you know how far I had to walk?" Squalo ranted angrily, waving his hands.

"I'm sorry...your mother and I had to look after your sister," the man explained. Squalo looked away. A sister? A little brother would have been better...some little kid to beat up. But a sister? Oh come _on_.

She may've only been a day old, but Squalo was already thinking about murder.

Yet, he still felt a tinge of jealousy. As a single child, his parents had been close to spoiling him - well, every now and then when their attention was actually on him. Now what?

His father smirked at his childish behavior. "Do you want to see her?" he teased.

"Go die in a hole," Squalo muttered, and stomped to his room. As he passed his parents room, he caught a glance of a tiny figure – so innocent; so fragile...but no. He quickly broke his gaze and kicked his door shut.

* * *

><p>It was in fact a three weeks before he paid his sister any attention. Both his parents were working and on 'business', which left him as the only one to look after her. He had put up a fight; but there was barely any point when both his parents were professionally qualified hitmen.<p>

And so, Squalo was left sulking in the corner of his parent's room, locked in with the one person he didn't want to see.

Babies are interesting things. They cry whenever something is wrong; Squalo didn't know that. Granted he was only six, but nonetheless, when Serena began bawling, his anger reached new levels.

"VOI! What do you want? Just shut up already!" he yelled, and it had no effect whatsoever. Squalo walked over to her and shoved a hand over her mouth. After some time, she ceased crying and looked up at him with teary eyes. Feeling just slightly guilty, he let go, since she'd stopped crying. He sat down hard, next to the crib and sighed.

Serena had stopped crying, and found interest at her new-found brother. Hesitantly, she stretched her hand out of the crib and poked his face. Squalo looked at Serena, she looked back; they shared a moment. A sibling moment. Sighing, Squalo looked away hastily. Well since she wasn't going to be dying off any time soon, he might as well make a good impression on her. After all, the only thing more annoying than a sister was an irritating one. He felt something yank on his hair.

"What?" His question was unanswered when she made a gurgling sound. "Toilet? Toys? Illness? Death? What is it?!" Squalo mentally slapped himself. Of course. She didn't know how to talk. Instead, her stomach grumbled – and Squalo understood. She was hungry. He pulled a half eaten packet of chips and offered her some – but she just sat there.

"It's food. Eat." He mumbled, shoving a piece into her mouth. She seemed to gag, and attempted to spit it out. He then realised – no teeth. Just perfect. He rolled his eyes. Now they would just have to wait until their parents returned.

But by nightfall, their parents had not returned. To be honest, Squalo was hungry, tired and struggling to find his patience. Serena didn't even have the energy to cry and piss him off. Squalo stood up. He didn't care about the consequences; he was going to get them out of the damn room.

Walking to the door, he hesitantly placed a hand and pushed. His parents argued a fair bit. A lot of door abuse had accumulated over the years, and it shifted a little. Straightening up, he took a few steps back, ran towards the door and placed a kick near the edge. Besides the pain, there was no effect. Again. And again. And again. Eventually, it snapped open, and he dragged his sister to the kitcen.

And that was how their parents found them the next morning – asleep at the kitchen table, baby food, milk powder and bread strewn around them.

* * *

><p>As time passed, Squalo was a decent brother. When Serena woke up crying in the middle of the night, he was always the first one to get her to be quiet. When their parents were on 'business', he looked after her. And on a normal basis, he was her role model. Perhaps not the best of role models...but she still learnt a lot.<p>

Like, when she was seven months old, Squalo was doing his homework. She had crawled into his room, and watched him; frustrated trying to do his homework.

"Fuck...how am I meant to know the fifth strongest mafia family?" he had growled to himself. Serena continued staring. "The Vongola has a secret assassination squad...what is it called?" he read out loud. "Damn! If it's secret, how the hell is anyone going to know what it's called?" With that statement, Squalo threw the sheet onto the floor, began jumping up and down on it, and swore as loud as he could.

"You – fuck – ing- piece – of – trash – should – go fuck – yourself – no – good – piece – of scum – fuck – off – bastard – teacher – " He would've gladly continued if he had not suddenly caught sight Serena, who was staring with interest at his behavior.

Busted.

"VOI! Whatever happens between these walls, stays between these walls. Got it?" he warned the baby, who in return absent-mindedly nodded.

That night, Serena began saying her first word.

"Ma – pa – ff – ka - " she tried.

"It's going to be papa," her father betted, bringing out a twenty euro bill.

"Is not! I'm saying it's mama!" her mother retaliated, also drawing out twenty euro bill.

"Da – ma – pa – fa – " she continued. Both parents waited, on the edge of their seats.

"Fa – fa...fuck!" Serena giggled happily. Both parents gaped and turned as one to Squalo, who was innocently eating a piece of broccoli.

"VOI! Why are you looking at me for?"

"WHY YOU LITTLE - "

The result? He had to walk to and back from school for a week.

* * *

><p>Serena was a fast learner. By her second birthday, she had already learned to talk – and like Squalo, her parents insisted she learn several languages. French, Japanese, Italian, English. It would become handy in the future.<p>

It was also around this time she began to walk. Her first steps were controlled by Squalo – who was doing a science experiment to contradict his teacher ('children can't teach'), but unfortunately Squalo received a month's worth of detention due to the teacher's humiliation. From his calculations, he would have detention a month after he left primary school.

All in all, Serena had grown into quite the cute child – short, innocent eyes and a habit of large smiles. And by her third birthday, Squalo and Serena had grown inseparable.

Despite Squalo's perfect grades, he was didn't get along with his teachers, and had broken numerous records for the number of detentions and teacher's who'd run away from the school, screaming.

He'd just finished another detention and his father late, so he was forced to wait with the other detainees. It just so happened that the schools most arrogant seniors decided to try their chances and pick on the weakest kid in the school. Dino Cavallone.

"Ha ha! You call that a push up, pipsqueak?" one of them sneered, kicking Dino to the floor. A teacher looked up from his novel, and looked back down. Hey; it was a mafia school. Bullying and fights were encouraged.

Squalo raised an eyebrow. He didn't care about who beat up who, but he respected the weak blonde's defiant look. "They're still better than yours, asshole."

"Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?!" another retorted angrily. "This is - "

"An asshole. Didn't you hear?" The room had gone silent. Squalo had quite the reputation in the school – his intelligence, athleticism and attitude were unmatched.

The leader took a moment to study Squalo, and grabbed the front of his shirt. "So oldy, what's up with the white hair?"

"Voi. What's up with your face?"

Sneer. "There's nothing wrong with my face."

Squalo rammed his forehead into the older boy, his mouth twitching into a small smile as he felt the other's nose break. "Well now there is."

"Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!" the class chanted happily, glad for an excuse for a break.

With their leader down, the three others regrouped and drew their weapons. Two had flick knives and the other had a baton. They charged as one, and Squalo made his way for the least experienced of the three. As they came within inches of each other, Squalo pushed the startled boy into the other two, and the trio toppled over, knives meeting flesh.

At that moment, the door of the classroom opened and his father and sister walked in. Now at the age of three, her hair was a shoulder length white and wore a black bow in her hair. "Hey bro!" Serena called out happily, completely unaware of the surrounding events.

Turning around at his sister's voice, he didn't notice the one of the boys lunge forward to stab him. "Duck!" Serena commanded; and Squalo did so just in time, trusting her voice. Any later, and he would've been skewered - instead, he received a cut on his arm.

"I hope you've got health insurance," Squalo growled, cracking his knuckles, "coz this won't be cheap to fix."

With a sigh, his father intervened. "All right, that's enough!" he yelled, dragging Squalo away.

"I'm not done yet!" Squalo insisted, attempting to go after the cowering boys.

"You've done enough," his father pointed out, continuing to drag him by the collar. "And those brats belong to a family I'd rather not mess with."

Embarrassed by the whole ordeal, the leader got to his feet and charged at Squalo. But before another fight could ensue, Serena casually stuck out her foot and placed a chair in the path of the young teen's face.

Smiling innocently, she broke into grin, running after her family. "Ciao!"

* * *

><p>It wasn't until they arrived home when the interrogation began. The head of the Squalo household was an informant. He had his methods on gaining the information. "Did you start that fight?!"<p>

Squalo glared back. "No."

"Oh really? Then why the hell - "

"Let's discuss your punishment," his mother tried more gently. "We could let that cut get infected."

"...I'm going to my room."

Sighing, his parents watched him leave. "Well, look on the bright side. At least Superbi's not the kid with half his face smashed in."

"Those boys had weapons. We might as well give him one too," his father suggested, eager to ease the mood.

"You know damn well that the reason you had to stop the fight was because Squalo would've beat the living shit out of them right?"

* * *

><p>I listened quietly at their conversation from my room. Thin walls had an 'up' side. As my parents words became more hushed, I pressed my ear onto the wall.<p>

"Though really, Serena's the one to blame for smashing in that kid's face..." I heard my father mutter. "For the love of God, I hope she grows up easier to deal with."

I could imagine my mother shrugging. "We should send her to school then."

"Isn't she still a bit young? It's hard to get in; and she'll only have one shot."

"She's bored! How many three year olds aren't fazed by graphic violence? We might as well send in an application," my mother finished. "And we agreed preschool was stupid."

"Fine. I'll get the application papers tomorrow."

Grinning to myself, I stretched on my bed. This was kinda like a new beginning, right?

* * *

><p><strong>What's up? The sky...yeah I know...<strong>

**Anyways, sorry about the jumps between first and third person - it just sounds really weird if it's all in third or all in first so...a mixture. The story right now kinda does seem slightly random, but I'm working on it...kinda. Have a nice day; ciao :]**

**To skip to the Varia: Chapter 9**

**To skip to Tsuna's time: Chapter 18**

**To skip to Kokuyu Arc: Chapter 20**

**To skip to Varia Arc: Chapter 23**

**To skip to Future Arc: Chapter 28**


	2. Training

Chapter 2 - New Encounters

"Soccer?"

"Nu uh."

"How about basketball?"

"I'd rather die."

"Volleyball then?"

"Ditto."

My parents and I had been at this for over half an hour. How long was it going to take them to realize that I didn't like team sports? The idea of winning had been ingrained into my mind by my family, and I wasn't going to let anyone screw up my chances.

"Then what do you want to do?" my mother sighed.

"Fight!"

"You're too small," my father interjected sternly. "Right now, you'll just get beat up by older students."

"I don't care. No pain, no – " I tried to point out, but was cut off by my mother.

"Fine. Let's bargain – if you build up your fitness and get into your brother's school; do whatever you want." Unwillingly, I nodded.

The next day, I met my trainer.

I didn't like him.

It wasn't just a bad first impression, I couldn't trust the guy. He was one of my father's acquaintances that appeared occasionally in a dinner conversation. There were three things very, very wrong with his appearance. Firstly - the blue pacifier strung around his neck. Secondly - falcons weren't the nicest birds in existence. And thirdly, most importantly, he was a baby. A BABY. The only _normal_ thing about him was his rifle.

"So...is this some kind of a joke?" I muttered, turning around to my father, only to see smoke and hear the screech of tyres as he drove off, leaving me in my t-shirt and shorts at a sports field that just happened to be empty.

"My name is Colonello, kora!" the baby stated. I whipped my head around – only to find him...not there. Hearing the flapping of wings, I looked up to see him staring back. _How does that bird keep him up?_

"Uhhh...sure. I'm Serena di Squalo..." I replied awkwardly, offering a hand shake. He didn't take it.

"So you're Matt's little kid..."

I tried not to keep my spirits up. _Speak for yourself, baby._

He poked me with his rifle, and shook his head, disappointed. "I'll train you to pass the examination kora!"

"Ah huh...wait what?" I started. What examination? Matt. That was my father's work name. So...this little guy was in the mafia?

"Stop wasting time and run around the field!" he barked and stuck his rifle in my face.

It took about half a minute for that to sink in. I began to walk, looking back uncertainly several times.

"Oi! Just run already!" Colonello yelled and threw a rock at my head – it missed by an inch. Grudgingly, I picked up the speed. By the time I was halfway round the field, I was exhausted. I took a break and leant on my knees for support.

'No breaks' was all I heard before a blue flash made its way towards me. Swallowing, I ran a few feet forward. Whatever he shot at me must have been deadly, because I could still heat on my back. Last I checked - it was a rifle, not a flamethrower! So there wasn't anything normal about him then, eh?

"I get it already!" I yelled back at him, sprinting as fast as I could. When I finally got back to the starting point, Colonello stopped his stopwatch. Where the hell did he even get that?

"What the hell was that kora?! What are you, a cow?" he barked. Did it ever occur to him that I was only THREE YEARS OLD? Obviously not. "Again!"

"What?! I'm tired. I'm thirsty. My brain hurts," I listed irritably.

He aimed his rifle at me.

"I'M GOING, I'M GOING."

* * *

><p>When I got home, my mother was in a deep discussion with Squalo, with several diagrams of swords. "Hey sweetie!" she smiled as I walked through the living room. "How was it?"<p>

I simply stopped for a moment, and without looking at her, said "fucking lame" and left for my room.

* * *

><p>Squalo heard the door slam. "So Mom...I'm guessing that's not a good thing?" he asked hesitantly.<p>

His mother gave a weak smile back. "Don't worry about it...come on, let's pick a sword." She shuffled through a few more pictures, and took one out. "How about this one?" He looked at the picture... 'The katana. Sharp enough to slice a man in half. Ranked third.'

"That won't do...one side's blunt," Squalo pointed out. He flipped through a few more. "What about a rapier? It's got hand protection."

"No..., if you're opponents, strong, they'll just destroy the blade," his mother insisted. Squalo raised a disbelieving eyebrow. But hey, this was her field of work. Of course she would know. It was at that moment when Squalo's father came through the door.

"We need to talk."

* * *

><p>"What do you mean she's a physical abomination?" I heard my mother whisper. "Genetically speaking - !"<p>

"I don't know...Colonello says she has no potential at all. At this rate...she's going to fail that exam."

"We shouldn't give up on her yet!" I heard Squalo demand. "There are other components in the exam too right? As long as if she does better in the rest, then it'll make up for the physical bit."

Argh. What exam?

"That's not always guaranteed," our mother muttered. "Your school always likes to spice it up a bit."

Strange. I was asleep – I was sure of that. But why the hell could I hear their conversation? I was in a white space...well all I could see was white. After a few more minutes, colours began to appear, and an image formed. Odd...it was an image of a girl; a teenager. I had no idea who she was. Stranger danger?

"My name is Alexandra Knight..." she started. I didn't believe it...what type of a dream was like this? They weren't meant to talk, right? Just to be sure, I reached forward and tried to touch her face, and she reached her hand in unison. No...that wasn't right – and then I realized.

I was touching a mirror. That was my reflection.

_I don't look like that...?_

* * *

><p><em>Some days later...<em>

Disaster. That's all I could say. I improved apparently - by three seconds. Squalo was teaching me the basics of school – like one plus one is two - and it was relatively easy. Well...really easy. It was as if...I had done it before. Though that seemed completely crazy. I'd already been taught how to read and write.

My parents were trying to teach me grace – weird things like never slamming a door, table manners and crap like that. But that was what I found the hardest. Being graceful was something I wasn't born to be – I couldn't even count the times I swore at people in public. Accidentally and purposely. I couldn't control my temper or even keep focus. My parents even had the idea that I had a mental disorder – ADHD, autism or something among those lines.

I wanted to give up, tell my parents to forget our deal, forget about learning how to fight like Squalo, forget about everything. Failure was a new concept - and I sure as hell hated it. But I didn't want to back out. That must've been the thing Squalo called pride.

All those thoughts changed when I overheard my father on the phone that night.

"Colonello! Yeah...I know. It's always nice to hear from you..." I heard him say.

Colonello replied in a fuzzy voice. "Kora! I'm telling you, now's your last chance to back out. After tomorrow, you can't back out of the entrance test. You know that right?"

"I do..." my father sighed.

"Then you know that if she fails, they'll hunt down everyone in your family and kill them right?" Colonello pointed out. It was hard to tell if Colonello was being truthful. I figured since he was bothered to waste money to make a phone call, it was.

I froze as the news set in. Everyone was going to die? Since when?! Moving towards my father's room, Squalo stood in path, having overheard the conversation as well. "Don't."

"Don't what?" I asked innocently, playing dumb.

"VOI! If you throw away this chance, you won't get a second one!" he insisted. "If you don't get into this school, you won't have a future."

"Squalo...if I fail, none of us will have one," I pointed out glumly.

"All the best hitmen in the world weren't born all great and powerful – they earned it. So long as you try hard, it'll be fine!" Squalo lied. I knew it was a bluff...hitmen were always born with talent. Like Squalo. Like my parents. Heck, even Colonello. But Squalo's determination made me reconsider.

"I'll...I'll give it some thought," I muttered.

* * *

><p><em>The next morning<em>

Colonello's jaw dropped as he stopped the timer. Progress. Actual progress. Sure, it wasn't at the requirement yet, but... "Did you take steroids kora?" he demanded. Serena tried to shrug her shoulders, but was barely conscious, lying spread eagled on the grass.

* * *

><p>"Twenty-four plus twelve," Squalo made up on the spot.<p>

"Thirty six." Serena answered hesitantly.

"How many Vongola rings are there?"

"...Seven."

"What continent is Algeria in?"

"A-Africa."

"What does CD stand for?"

"Uh...compact disc."

"What's the third last letter in the Italian alphabet?"

She counted on her fingers for a moment. "U."

"How many months in a year?"

"Twelve?"

"Be more confident!" Squalo lectured, but nonetheless smiled, in the midst of a 'brotherly pride' moment. "Good job. So...that leaves grace."

* * *

><p>I held my knife carefully, delicately cut a piece of steak and poked it with my fork.<p>

"Serena...keep your elbows down..." my mother sighed. I opened my mouth to apologize, but my father stopped me.

"Don't talk with your mouth full. Remember?"

My eye twitched, as I swallowed and took a deep breath. _They're just trying to help, they're not intentionally pissing me off..._

My mother continued. "So honey...how was your day at work today?"

"It was brilliant; and my sister's kid's hair is white too," my father shrugged.

"How odd... I hope he stays out of the mafia though..." my mother said with a worried tone. "He's the illegitimate one right?"

"Yeah...it's a shame. He would've gotten along great with Squalo."

"Um...shouldn't you be trying to make conversation with me so I know how to respond?" I asked confused.

"Never forget this Serena - in society, you must respect you're older students and teachers. That means no interruptions, no impolite comments...just don't talk unless you have to. Okay?" my father lectured.

"But Squalo doesn't!" I whined, pointing at Squalo who had been quiet throughout the whole experience.

"Don't raise you voice..." Squalo said with a hint of a smile. I grinded my teeth.

"Don't whine..." my mother added. I gripped my knife so hard my knuckles were white.

"Don't..." my father began. I snapped.

"JUST SHUT IT! I DON'T GIVE A FUCKING SHIT! GRACE IS FOR SHIT LOSERS WHO HAVE NO FRICKING LIFE COZ THEY'RE BASTARDS AND DON'T HAVE A SCRAP OF SELF DIGNITY!" I yelled, shoved down my knife and fork, then went to my room and slammed my door shut.

"Don't swear..." Squalo sighed, putting his face in his hands.

"Don't shove down your cutlery..." my mother groaned.

"Don't destroy the house..." my father concluded. Now this was a problem. But every problem has a solution.

* * *

><p>Lavina stared at the window, distant and quiet. There were several things ruining her life – she had cancer and would soon die; she had given birth to a beautiful son, but wasn't allowed to see him; and currently her brother was calling her.<p>

She picked up with a sigh on the fourth ring. "What do you need?"

Serena's father felt just a little guilty. He never actually called to check up on her, he only called when he needed something. BUT he did really care about her. Enough for her to know that she wasn't dead to him. "Well, little sis...I was wondering...how would you like to have a student?"

"You want me to teach your daughter the piano," she summarised, sounding tired.

"Bingo! Midday for the next few weeks, yeah? See you tomorrow!" He hung up, leaving Lavina listening to the annoying beeps.

* * *

><p>My aunt was a good pianist. And a good teacher. But honestly, I was a bad student. It was as if my aunt was born with natural grace - beautiful, controlled expressions, warm eyes, elegant movements. It was as if my goal was right in front of me.<p>

"You've got to play softer...it makes the piece more gentle," she tried to reason.

"Oh really? Okay. How about that?"

"That's even louder..."

I pulled my hands off the piano and facepalmed. "This is impossible."

My aunt smiled. "Practice makes perfect. Come on, try again."

* * *

><p>Squalo tapped his fingers on his desk. Math was always seriously boring. And plus, everyone around him was using a calculator. Even an idiot could enter a few digits into a machine. His gaze was focused outside the window – some people were fencing.<p>

Thrust, block, parry, lunge. Squalo could see that the teacher wasn't very skilled. He left his left side wide open.

"SQUALO! Pay attention. And stop drumming your fingers on the table, it's annoying!"

Without breaking his gaze out the window, Squalo stopped moving his fingers and began to shake his leg rhythmically.

"Superbi Squalo, if you don't pay attention this instant, you can spend the rest of your life in detention!"

He was paying attention. Who said he couldn't multitask? "Because of you, I'm supposed to have detention until I'm twenty three years old. Why should I care?" Squalo replied with a bored tone, still focused on the events outside. His mind was itching to have the reassurance of a blade. And conveniently - he had his sword inches away, in his backpack.

"Don't you _dare_ be cocky with me, young man. Answer the third question!"

"Seventy four and a half." Squalo didn't need to look at the board. His memory was photographic.

"Wrong!" his teacher yelled triumphantly.

"Actually Sir...it's right," one of his classmates pointed out.

"Dino Cavallone, you are a failure, so if you speak one more time during this lesson, you can have detention for a week. YOU GOT THAT?" Dino immediately shut up. He couldn't do push ups if his life depended on it. "Question 4 Squalo!"

"Four thirds. Fifth question: a hundred and ninety-two. Sixth: forty seven and a quarter. Seventh – " Squalo recited, still immersed in the battle outside the window. The rest of his class was frantically trying to copy down his answers.

His teacher finally realized what he really was focusing on, and closed the blinds. Squalo immediately snapped. "VOI! What the hell was that for? I answered your stupid questions! What do you fucking want?" he ranted, standing up.

"SHUT UP! SHOW SOME RESPECT!" his teacher barked, and shoved Squalo in the chest. He landed on a desk two rows behind.

"AFTER YOU!" Squalo roared, leapt forward, grabbed his sword from his bag, and brandished it in a defensive stance. Then he stepped forward and swung. He would have decapitated the teacher, if his blade had not been parried by the principal, who drew a sword from somewhere in his business jacket. Mafia. In heart, they were all magicians.

"Squalo, refrain yourself!" the principal ordered.

"Why should I? This piece of trash attacked me first!" he retaliated, and attempted to lunge at the skilled man. "And where the hell did you come from?" They had a few more swings at each other when his maths teacher picked him up from behind.

"Gotcha you little - !" was all the man managed to say before Squalo elbowed him in the nose. The teacher heroically fainted. It was that moment when the principal used the hilt of his sword to give Squalo a good whack in the head. Sighing, the principal leisurely took Squalo's sword and dragged him to his office by his collar.

"Students, please take your teacher to the nurses office; then you can have the rest of the day off. Dismissed."

* * *

><p>The principal looked at the boy sitting in front of him. Being the principal of Superbi Squalo had made him detest retirement from being a hitman.<p>

Squalo was not ugly; despite his almost permanent scowl. His school record was not a clean one. In fact, it was absolutely filthy. But nonetheless, Squalo was a valuable student; and one of the brightest the school had ever seen. It very likely he even had what the mafia world called 'Varia quality'.

There was a knock on the door, and Squalo's parents and sister entered. Squalo didn't need to look at his family; this happened once a week, after all.

"Your son's behaviour is - "

"Unacceptable," Squalo cut in, bored. The same words were spoken every single time.

His principal ignored him. "Despite this, he has talent. I believe that Squalo should begin high school. Immediately." He waited for an objection.

Squalo's father spoke up first. "Sir, there's no point in rushing to be an adult."

His mother also commented. "And plus, our daughter is taking the entrance test in two weeks, and we want them to be in the same school for at least a year."

"I'm not dragging Squalo down," Serena argued angrily.

The principal was not going to give up easily. Superbi Squalo was stress. If he didn't get rid of Squalo, he'd just be slowly killing himself. "I'm implementing a new system...grades will be based on skills rather than age. It could be a great opportunity for a number of students, including Squalo and your daughter, if she has the abilities."

Squalo grabbed Serena's hand and left the room with a yawn. "Same time next week, Sir."

* * *

><p>I didn't actually think that Squalo was popular. He had made it very clear that he had no friends, but his classmates swarmed around him, chatting idly about recent events. As he continued answering questions and having a casual 'chat', I walked over to the monkey bars. There was something I wanted to practice.<p>

I climbed the metallic ladder and rested my hands on the first bar. Then I hauled myself over it, so I was crouching on top of the bars, not hanging on them. _Inner peace..._that's what Colonello had tried to teach me that morning. Slowly, I let go and stood up straight. Closing my eyes, I raised one foot off the railing. Inner peace. So far, so good.

"How much do you want to bet that she's going to fall?"

"She'll fall for sure – the real question is how long she's going to last."

"I bet two minutes."

"I bet one."

Cracking open an eye, I wobbled. It was Squalo's stupid classmates. "HEY! Can you assholes just shut the hell up?" Important life lesson: apparently people didn't like to be called assholes. They picked up rocks and started throwing them.

_Inner peace, inner peace, inner peace... _They had no aim, but that didn't mean they didn't have luck. I was in the midst of jumping back and forth between the bars when Squalo saw me.

Immediately, he tackled the two boys and I gladly stopped. He was far, far away. But it was the wrong thing to do. From stopping so suddenly, I couldn't do anything but flap my arms around madly, trying to regain some balance – but failed. I fell backwards, and squeezed my eyes shut, ready for impact.

BAM! My vision blurred and I saw stars.

"Ow..." I heard someone groan behind – no underneath me. I took a look, and saw that I had fallen on someone – in fact, my foot was still on their face.

"VOI! Serena! Are you okay?" Squalo yelled, running towards us. I nodded and got off the boy. My wrist had already started to swell. Shit.

"I'm fine," I replied weakly. Squalo helped the boy I had landed on to his feet. "I owe you one Cavallone..." he muttered.

"Technically speaking, you owe me plenty..." Dino murmured, rubbing his face. I figured it wasn't the time to tell him his face had a beautiful imprint of my shoe.

Instead, I poked him. "Are you okay?" Apparently not many girls talked to Dino, young or old, because he blushed and began to stutter.

"Y-Yeah...I'm fine...um...are y-you okay?" he asked, looking at my arm.

"Couldn't be better," I said sarcastically. He didn't get it.

"Come on, I'll piggy back you to the nurses' office..." Squalo sighed, and ushered for me to get on his back.

"One sec..." I growled and stood up. Making my way to the two boys who'd caused the incident, I smirked. "Go fuck yourselves you fucktards!" I flipped them off, and then got on Squalo's back. School seemed fun.

* * *

><p><strong>Uh...I'm going to make Gokudera Squalo's cousin, since they do seem kinda similar (the whitesilver hair, anger issues, yelling, shocking loyalty, etc.), though they'll probably never meet. If the OC character becomes too mary sue or the others become too OOC, please LET ME KNOW (review, PM, telepathy, etc.)**

**Anyways, have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	3. Exam Day

**Oh yeah - before I forget - I couldn't really figure out whether Superbi was Squalo's first or last name, because of the whole different Japanese/Western last name first name mess, so...Superbi is Squalo's first name - and Squalo is his family name. BUT i'm just going to call Squalo 'Squalo' - because that sounds better :P**

**Please enjoy :]**

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 3 - Exam Day<span>

"Four weeks." The nurse muttered, staring at the x-ray. "At least. Seven at most."

"VOOIII! You can't be serious!" Squalo yelled, shaking his hands in distress. "What about her other injuries? Are they just scratches?"

"Nothing too serious. They should heal in about a week. What she really needs is a cast – or the bone won't heal straight," the young nurse explained with a sigh.

"Isn't there any other option? Surgery? Bandages? Cheap Asian materials?"

Fiberglass.

To be honest, it wasn't any better than plaster.

* * *

><p>I was running away...from a demonic rock, who dislocated its limbs and chased me. Then it ate Squalo, my parents, Aunt Lavina, the principal, for some reason a nurse, the boy that I fell on, and fire. Lots of fire.<p>

"HOLY CHICKENT SHIT!" I yelled, sitting upright. I looked around to get my bearings. My room. Of course...where else could I be? Someone had fallen off the chair beside my bed. Since when did I have a chair there?

"VOOOOIIIII! How about some more warning next time, yeah?" Squalo grumbled from the floor, pushing himself back up.

"Sorry bro..." I apologized, stretching. I tried to prop myself up, but found I couldn't. Why was there so little friction between my bed and my arm? I threw off the covers, and the events of the previous day hit me. The cast. Dang.

Squalo, being the great brother he was, tried to make me feel better. Of course it failed. How could something like 'what if we chopped off your arm and let it grow back' cheer anybody up? Honestly, the guy may've been a genius, but his logic was twisted. Eventually, he gave up.

"Look. It's late; and I have school to deal with in a few hours. Just...just...believe." With the final word, he left my room, leaving me staring the closed door.

_Yeah - there's a big difference between Disney and reality._

* * *

><p>"Kora! What the hell is that?" Colonello barked, glaring at my new cast.<p>

"What do you think it is?" I grumbled back. Colonello took a long stare.

"Well, then, you'd better hurry up and train."

Colonello had been surprisingly understanding. I did the same exercises as I always did, and he didn't even hesitate with his painful instructions. When I asked him why, he smirked.

"My teacher was one cold-hearted bitch. I broke my leg once; she didn't give me a scrap of mercy. Actually, she made me run in a marathon."

"How'd you go?"

"Oh, I ended up breaking my other leg."

_...How reassuring._

* * *

><p>"A blessing in disguise? How in the world is fracturing my wrist a blessing in disguise!" I asked my aunt, shocked.<p>

"Well...if you press the keys too hard, it hurts right? Then now you can finally play softer – and actually hear the song," my aunt explained casually. And you know what? She was right. I did play softer. But did that make me any more graceful? Of course not.

* * *

><p><em>Somewhere, in Squalo's principal's office...<em>

"Ah yes. Is this the Trident Mosquito speaking?" he began.

"_I believe this is the Hell's Snake speaking?_" Shamal replied in a bored tone.

"Maybe, maybe not. I require your services."

"_T__hen that would depend on the target and method_," Shamal pointed out.

"Serena di Squalo. I don't need death; just something that will lower the senses. Can you do it?"

"_Course I can do it. But I don't harm women...never have, never will. Sorry,_" Shamal sighed, about to hang up.

"I only need a few hours - for what, a couple thousand Euros? Easy money!"

"_Is she ugly?_"

The principal hesitated. "She's absolutely hideous." In about fifty years._  
><em>

"_Get me a hot date, and we've got a deal_."

"Deal."

With that, Shamal hung up. The principal grinned. If Serena failed the exam; then Squalo would be killed. The end of all his problems.

And he loved sabotage.

* * *

><p><em>The morning of the exam...<em>

Monday mornings were never really my sort of thing.

So thank God it was a Tuesday.

It was tradition for the students of the school to view segments of the exam - though according to Squalo, they did nothing more than laugh at those who failed.

The details were still fuzzy to me. All I knew, was that this was a test in which failure was not an option. We arrived an hour before we were meant to be - JUST because my parents were paranoid. Still, we were the last to arrive. There were over a hundred children waiting.

"Seeing that we're all here, we will be starting now. The first part will be intelligence. All contestants please move to the hall."

Anxiety. This was how it must've felt like. "Well, this is it. I'm sorry."

My father squeezed my shoulder gently. "Don't sweat it; we'll be with you." My mother nodded reassuringly.

Squalo led me away from our parents, and lowered his voice. Wow. I never knew he had the ability to. He took out a necklace – a white gold chain and a blue and silver shark charm - and helped me put it on. "Good luck."

I swallowed. Luck...I was going to need a hell lot of it today.

* * *

><p>I admit, intimidation got the better of me. It was easy. Take the last question.<p>

_There are four chickens and twelve ducks. If the Vongola family killed seven ducks, how many more ducks than chickens will there be?_

I was left with around half an hour to sit tight and twiddle my thumbs. Argh. I slapped my neck and saw a mosquito flying away. It was already itchy.

* * *

><p>"So...how are the results?" the principal smiled, looking at his assistant.<p>

"There were only a few who did extremely poorly..." the assistant replied, staring at the list in front of him.

"Was there some Squalo kid in the group of failures?" the principal asked, stroking his chin.

"Oh, I remember that name. She was one of the highest scorers. Why?"

The principal cursed.

* * *

><p>"Serena! Serena? VOI! Where the hell are you?" Squalo yelled.<p>

The obstacle course was ready to go; starting with a mile run, followed by series of ropes, ladders and a floor charged with electricity. It was a race – groups of twenty - and Serena's heat started soon.

Squalo turned another corner. Nothing. He'd checked everywhere – no Serena. As Squalo ran through the court, something in his gut told him to stop. Skidding to a halt, he took a good look. In the corner, he saw someone sitting down.

"VOI! Serena!" Squalo yelled, making his way to the figure.

"Squalo...is that you?" Serena asked, looking up vaguely in his direction. She looked horrible – pale, sickly and her eyes weren't exactly focused on him.

"What the hell happened to you?" Squalo growled, crouching down in front of her. He felt her forehead – surprised to find it burning. Squalo came to a decision. "That's it. You're pulling out."

He would never forget the look in her eyes. "I can do this. I have to do this."

* * *

><p>"On you marks, get set, GO!"<p>

That was all I heard before a bullet shot through the air. The other contestants were already miles in front of me (so to speak) – dazed, I was slower to react. But my training pulled through, and I overtook them halfway through.

After I climbed the first ladder obstacle my stomach churned uneasily. Monkey bars. How the hell was I meant to climb monkey bars? A good part of my arm was in a _cast_. Ladders were one thing, monkey bars were another.

Cursing further, I saw a whole crowd of jeering children. Great. Squalo's whole school could witness my epic failure. "Fuck!" It felt good to hear my voice - it told me I was still alive. And if I was alive, I wasn't going to give up.

A miniature Colonello appeared flying in front of my left ear. Oh brilliant. Now I was hallucinating as well. "Don't just stand there kora!."

"Well then - what am I meant to do!"

"Think outside the box!" he yelled and flew away. Outside the box...he was right! When plan A failed, plan B saved the day, right?

I walked closer to the edge of the platform and then hauled myself above the structure. Oh the bad memories... Then I ran across the set of bars, jumped off the edge, and landed on the next platform with a gentle thud.

One by one, I finished the other obstacles: sliding down ropes instead of balancing and crawling, walking over barbed wire (wasn't that the reason they invented shoes?) - but several times, my eyes acted up and I slipped to find myself dangling by a few fingers.

Finally, I made it to the last obstacle; a wall slightly shorter than five feet – no handholds and practically no friction available. Now I was _totally_ screwed. When I jumped, my fingertips just scratched the edge.

In the end, I don't really know what happened. Looking behind, I saw someone coming my way; the crowd was just laughing at my misfortune, I had a headache, and my arm was starting to swell. I kicked off my shoes and stacked them on top of each other on the ground. It was only a few inches, but it was probably enough.

Taking about ten steps back, I breathed in and out slowly. _Go! _Sprinting forward, I let my last step be on my shoes, and jumped off. My elbows made it over - and I manoeuvred my legs over the edge, falling down a steep slide that lead to a swimming pool.

A cold swimming pool.

I didn't know how to swim, so I probably swallowed half the pool by the time I made it to shallow ground. Now that my adrenaline rush was over, I was swept over by a wave of fatigue and nausea. Squalo appeared, dragged me out and wrapped a fluffy towel around my shoulders.

The water had damaged the cast to some extent, Squalo, seeing my discomfort, sliced the thing off with his sword. "You all right?"

"No."

"The point of the question is for you to say 'yes'."

"Well I'm being honest."

* * *

><p><em>In the recording tent:<em>

The principal snatched up the results. 'Serena di Squalo – pass with bonus points for interesting methods' .

She was drugged. She had a fucking messed up wrist. She was notably smaller and weaker than a number of other entries. How hard was it to kill just one child?!

* * *

><p>Squalo had an arm on my shoulder as they announced the results.<p>

"Congratulations to all competitors! The final exam is to bounce a tennis ball on a tennis racquet fifty times without dropping it. One minute to prepare!"

I'd started moving before the others, so I grabbed a racquet and ball before the other kids surged forward. Squalo showed me how to do it. "Not too hard, not too light, but just right. Like Goldilocks." He left with a wave.

"Three, two, one, go!"

Once, twice, thrice, drop. Argh...Squalo had made this sound so easy! So I was probably hitting the ball too hard... Seven drops later, I was pretty sure I had gotten the hang of it.

Twenty! Bang bang bang... Thirty. Around me, there were several children who had already finished, though the majority were just hitting the ball at random, no quite understanding the concept needed.

It was about that time when I felt my blood run cold. Something was slithering up my leg. I dared to take a peek. It was a horrible lime green – and about three feet in length. A snake. _Find a happy place, find a happy place... _

It started making its way up to my waist. In my haste to grab a look, I accidentally swerved my racquet towards it – striking its head.

Forty five. It coiled, snapped it's jaws a few times and reared for a strike. Just a little longer...

"It was an accident, I'm sorry, chill..." I tried to say to the snake. Of course it didn't work. Forty seven, forty eight...

As if it was slow motion, it pushed forward and sunk it's fangs into my arm.

Screaming, I hit the tennis ball too hard – and it flew into the air. Squalo appeared from the middle of nowhere and hacked off the snakes head. _One more..._ Running after the ball, I managed to whack it just as I lost consciousness.

* * *

><p><strong>I have a confession...I am a weird person. I have a knack for people loosing consciousness, developing injuries, swearing, and several other...things.<strong>

**Have a nice day, ciao! :]**


	4. I Hate Hospitals

Chapter 4 - I Hate Hospitals

"I – can – not – believe – I – let – her – get - hurt – again!" Squalo yelled, hacking his sword around the hospital room. "VOOIII!" The other children in the hospital wing ducked under their covers, shivering. Unable to control himself, Squalo threw his sword and nailed a stuffed bear in the throat.

Outside the room, a doctor was trying to explain the situation to his parents.

"A snake? Are you serious? How the hell does a snake wind up at a school without anyone realising?"

"And what do you mean an 'unexplainable' disease? She was fine this morning!"

"The snake wasn't poisonous, but it left a bad wound. We can't say when she'll wake up, but it'll be a painful next few weeks..." the doctor diagnosed.

* * *

><p>Depressing.<p>

I wanted to jump up and say I was fine, but technically speaking, I couldn't because I figured I was in a dream. I knew that I was really lying in a hospital bed with an oxygen mask shoved on my face and a few I.V drips stabbed in my arm – minus the pain. I could vaguely hear Squalo's distant yells and...strangely enough, peace.

The dream...was hard to explain. I'd heard that people from dreams were people you saw from real life. You couldn't talk in a dream. But I was in a school, with plenty of other people with _faces _who _spoke_.

"Hey Alex! Wait up a sec. Have you done your Jap homework?" The question was directed to me, but I had no idea who Alex was. Was it a guy? I was surrounded by girls. I didn't have any control of my - no, _the _body I was in.

"I'm guessing you want to copy it?" it replied, grabbing something from a bag that was on my back.

A few more phrases were thrown around – and the body began to walk around. After a while, I managed to catch a reflection of the body - it was that weird girl in my dream! Alexandra Knight or something. How the fuck...?

Her world seemed a lot more different than I was used to – though I had to admit I liked it. People's faces looked...realistic compared to the ones I had seen. In fact, Squalo and Colonello looked like cartoons compared to these people.

I spent the rest of the day observing her life – I didn't actually have a choice. School, playing musical instruments, chatting with friends, arguing with parents; an unbelievably ordinary life. Oddly, the things she learnt in school were complicated; yet I found myself following easily.

At night, Alexandra went on a computer – though it was far more advanced than any machine I had ever seen. She began reading something called 'FanFiction'. Fiction of the fan? For some reason, when I tried to read the words, they seemed to mix themselves up. _Urgh, why can't I read anymore?_

Several words kept on repeating themselves, so I tried to make sense of them. 'Kateikyoushi Hitman Reborn'. Didn't that mean Hitman Home Tutor Reborn in Japanese? Tsuna...Dino...Xanxus...Squalo. Were they names? 'Squalo' wasn't exactly a common name.

Just as I made the small connection, I was cast into darkness, and it slipped from my mind.

"So what did you think about my life?" Alexandra asked, appearing to my left.

"Familiarly boring," I stated flatly, fully aware that I still didn't trust her.

She snorted in response. "Don't forget any of these memories."

"Why?"

"One day you'll understand." And then she left me alone. Why couldn't these people just say something outright? Why the hell did they have to be so...mysterious?

* * *

><p>"Two weeks? Do you even know how long that is?" Squalo complained. "Fourteen days!"<p>

"Look. We need to find out who did this to us. It's just a small trip," his father promised. "Be sure to look after your sister while we're gone."

"Have fun on your field trip," he growled sarcastically.

Both his parents sighed in unison. "Keep your sword with you, don't talk to strangers, take public transport, and here's four thousand Euros." They rushed out the door, once again leaving him with a truckload of responsibilities.

"VOI! Wait!" he tried to call. "What do I do about clothes? I've never taken public transport in my life. Where the hell do I keep four thousand Euros?! And if someone want to kill us, why are you LEAVING US HERE?"

But it was too late. His parents were gone.

* * *

><p><em>The next morning...<em>

Squalo made it just in time for the morning bell, had a great morning argument with his PE teacher and by history - he just wanted to be alone. Dino Cavallone tried to sit next to him. "Hey, is this seat – " he began, tripped on his foot and would've fallen on the edge of the table, had Squalo not caught him in time.

"Be my guest..." Squalo muttered, gesturing to the empty seat.

The teacher walked in right on the bell, full of energy. "All right class! I've already got some topics here - pick a partner and line up! Everyone gets to draw out of the hat; first in first serve. Let's go!" his teacher barked.

"Voi, Dino. Partner?" Squalo asked absent-mindedly.

Dino beamed. "Sure Squalo. You want to pick out of the hat?"

"No...you can do it..." Squalo replied, mind on other matters. They were first in, but unfortunately, Dino had pretty bad luck. Of all the exciting topics, they got 'Mafia Family Structure'. Squalo wasn't even screwed to groan. Really, who gave a fuck? The boss was on top. All the subordinates were scum on the bottom of their shoes.

"All right everyone! This is due on Friday! No class time, so make arrangements with you partners!" the teacher announced.

"So Squalo...when are you free this week?" Dino asked casually.

"None. I've gotta stay at the hospital with my sister," Squalo replied.

"What! Then what about our assignment?" Dino said frantically, hyperventilating.

"Chill..." Squalo advised. "If you want to finish the damn thing together, come to the hospital."

* * *

><p>And thus, later that day, Dino Cavallone ended up at a hospital - without an injury - for the first time in his life. Romario had the glorious job of being chauffeur, and tagged along absent-mindedly.<p>

"Hey Doctor...has there been any change?" Squalo asked hopefully to a doctor passing by.

"Sorry kid, she's still unconscious."

"Right." Squalo sighed dejectedly as they entered the quiet room.

Romario, being the great subordinate he was, tried to change the subject. "Do either of you know anything about Mafia structure?" Both boys shook their heads.

"Well then…..I'll explain. There's the boss. He runs the family, organizes where the money flows, heists, crap like that. The next in command is the underboss – if the boss dies or is in risk of going to jail, the underboss becomes the new boss."

Dino gulped. So that's what his father meant.

"Under that, there are capos. Each capo looks after a small area and a group of subordinates. Not every family has capos – like the Cavallone. It changes every generation. The rest of the family consists of the subordinates. Usually, we do all the dirty work. Other than that...there's an external advisor. Associates are just tools. Got that?"

"Come again?" Dino and Squalo said in unison, equally lost.

* * *

><p>It took about four hours for Squalo and Dino to completely understand what Romario was trying to say. Thankfully, he was a patient enough to explain time after time.<p>

Unfortunately for me, my mind was wide awake, but my body was asleep – and I was forced to listen to hours and hour of boring information.

"I get it now!" I heard Squalo's friend declare, triumphant.

"I'm gonna grab a bit to eat," Squalo yawned. "I'll be back in a few minutes."

"Sure Squalo…" Dino sighed, feeling slightly awkward being left...well, with me. "How long can we stay Romario?"

"Another hour, young master."

"We'll have to do this again tomorrow, huh?"

It was that moment I broke out of my stupor. "Squalo!" I yelled, opening my eyes. I didn't really mean to yell, but my arm was killing me. I quickly scanned the room, but he was already gone. Instead, I saw an old guy and a blond kid – and I quickly remembered that he was the one I fell on.

"Aaarrggghhh!" the blond screamed, backing away.

"Aaaarrgghhh!" I screamed in response, bending my elbows in front of my face. My voice...it sounded so wheezy. _Breathe in, breathe out..._

"Please remain calm," some old guy spoke, making his way towards me.

"Who the hell are you people?" I panicked, sliding off the hospital bed. Man my head...it felt like it was going to split. Wasn't this meant to be a dramatic brotherly/sisterly moment? Not some kidnapping situation?

"Don't bend your elbows Miss, you'll blow out your vein," Romario insisted. I froze, in a defensive stance.

"I'm sorry, do I know you?" I questioned cautiously.

He finally got a hold of himself. "Uh well...I'm a friend of Squalo...we've uh...met before. You know...when you fell on me..." he said sheepishly. "This is Romario. I'm working on a project with Squalo. He uh...went to get food."

"Is that so..." I muttered, only slightly convinced. It was true - I did remember falling on him. "Don't you think that it's convenient that the moment I wake up, Squalo just happens to be out of this room?" I accused.

"Fate?" Dino suggested. He held out his hand. "Anyways, I'm Dino. Dino Cavallone."

"Serena di Squalo."

Before Squalo returned, I fell asleep again.

* * *

><p>Later that night, I woke up again with a chainsaw of a headache. "Squalo...you there?" I muttered, propping myself up. He was sound asleep, snoring away in his chair. Looking around, I saw a nurse fiddling with the IV drip.<p>

"Oh you're up. How are you feeling?" she whispered.

"Headache...and my arm's killing me," I sighed.

"The morphine should be working." She frowned. "Would you like some water?"

"That would be nice."

"I'll be back in a few minutes okay?" she smiled.

I gave a weak smile in return. "Thank you..."

The nurse walked off happily. It was nice to be thanked. _That's such a sweet girl..._

* * *

><p>I finally met Squalo the following morning. I just made it – a second later and he would've left for school. Of course, I made him late, but it's not like either of us minded.<p>

"Oh yeah – I almost forgot. I've got a classmate coming her this afternoon. Just a heads up alright?" Squalo warned.

"I met him yesterday. Nice guy. Did you finally make a friend?"

"Maybe."

Later that day, Colonello visited.

"What are you still doing in bed, kora? Go run four laps!" Colonello ordered.

"Uh..."

"I'm kidding!" Colonello grinned. "Can't you take a joke?"

I sweatdropped. "After all those stories about your teacher, no."

"I...need...a...nap..." Colonello drifted off, falling asleep almost immediately - he didn't even close his eyes.

Yup, a great babysitter. Literally a baby that sits there.

* * *

><p><em>Somewhere in Rome...<em>

"How do you know Shamal is here?" our mother whispered.

"It's dating roulette night with the hottest women in the country. There's no way that guy would miss this," our father whispered back. His wife frowned. "I'm not saying that you're not beautiful, honey."

"No, I see him!"

A short distance from them, Shamal was flirting with a girl - though it seemed to be going poorly. The girl slapped him and ran away.

"Ouch...I hope we meet again!" Shamal yelled after her. They sweatdropped. What type of a 'genius assassin' couldn't even pick up a girl? "Now you two, don't you think you've been hiding there for too long?" Shamal spoke, serious.

The two stepped out from the shadows, equally serious.

"Oh! You're a cute one! How would you like to go on a date with me?" Shamal asked out mother, attitude changing completely.

"OI! She's married!" Our father raised his fist threateningly.

"Oh...didn't see you there..." Shamal yawned, much to our father's annoyance. "So, you're looking for me?"

"Do you know who we are?" our mother asked.

"If you're married, you probably have kids. I'm supposing some relation to Serena di Squalo?" Shamal guessed.

"We're her parents," our father muttered.

"I thought as much. Sorry, couldn't back out. The guy who hired me gave me fake information. She was a cute kid," Shamal reassured.

"Who hired you?" our mother demanded.

"You people look smart...doesn't the word ómerta mean anything to you?" Shamal said in an obvious tone.

"Look. Our daughter almost died. We can't let that pass," our father pointed out.

"My employer...I suggest you drop it, and live another day," Shamal advised, and began to walk away.

"Hey! We didn't come this far for nothing. Who?" our mother insisted.

"Because you're cute, I'll give you a clue. Snakes. Byebii~" Shamal waved and left, leaving two very confused parents.

* * *

><p><strong>Yep, it's a random story.<strong>

**Have a nice day, ciao :]**


	5. Prophecies and Wolves

Chapter 5 - Prophecies and Wolves

My stay at the hospital came quickly to an end. Medicine was interesting – because for some reason, they didn't really work with me. Doctors just assumed that it was a nervous disorder. And I learned some first aid.

As the hours turned into days, long term effects became apparent - bad eyesight (I could've sworn that wasn't something new) and some minor mental issues (ADHD, dyslexia, that sort of stuff).

It was the day that Colonello checked me out of the hospital when I first got a taste of the real world. We were in a part of town that was, well, for 'bad crowds'.

"Where exactly are we going?" I asked Colonello uncertainly.

"A buffet. Don't worry, I've got cash," Colonello reassured.

"Then why exactly are we walking through an alleyway?" I fidgeted nervously, eyes darting around at every dripping tap, cockroach and rat.

"Shortcut," Colonello shrugged.

To be honest, it was the longest alleyway I'd ever been in. Actually it was the only alleyway I'd ever been in. As we took a left, I held my breath and came to a stop. Six or so burly men were standing right in front of us, smoking. Maybe if I hadn't stopped so suddenly, they wouldn't have noticed me. But nonetheless, they did.

"Well well well...what do we have here?" one of the men smirked, throwing his cigarette to the ground.

"Little bunny got lost eh?" another joked. I shuddered. Were my parents were really these types of people? Was this what the mafia really was like? Was this what Squalo was training to be?

"I'm your opponent kora!" Colonello yelled from somewhere behind them.

Blink.

I take back saying that he was an incapable baby. I take back every insulting, mean and possibly rude comment. Why? Because he was amazing. Ten seconds. That's all it took for him to beat up six men who were five times larger than him. And the most surprising thing? When he was done, he just casually cracked his knuckles, and said "I'm hungry. Let's go eat."

I just stood there and stared.

* * *

><p>Later that evening, we walked home (Colonello figured that I needed the exercise) though Colonello just flew (the damn hypocrite).<p>

Telling me to stay in my house, he told me he was taking a walk, and left. I found that just slightly odd. How long had he been awake? I'd never even seen him go so long without a nap. Colonello didn't even walk. He used his bird. So about minute after Colonello left, I followed him.

I figured 'stalking' was illegal for a reason, so I kept a relatively safe distance. Sadly, I found out that stalking was not a strong point of mine. How he didn't notice the number of trash-cans I tipped over, branches I stepped on, or times I swore; I would never know.

Bearing the boredom and exercise, my luck carried out when he arrived at a park and that weird pacifier he wore around his neck glowed blue. ...Huh? Hiding behind a tree, I stared and made a face. Five more babies with glowing pacifiers. What the hell? Was it a cult?

The baby with the yellow pacifier spoke first. "All right. Let's get to the point. Any luck on the curse?" Like Colonello, he didn't act like his age at all. He was even wearing a suit for Christ's sake!

The others all shook their heads in a depressed fashion. Besides the clothing, they all carried weapons. The only girl present seemed to have a rifle like Colonello.

"What about you Reborn?"

"No luck."

They talked about things that made no sense, and I stayed by the tree, tired. In the end, it was my arm that gave it away. I was getting pins and needles from my injury and in my discomfort, I stepped on a twig. Instantly, the babies were around me, weapons at the ready.

"Woah! I come in peace!" I said shocked, hands in front of me, as if I was trying to calm them down. _G__eez, I knew I shouldn't have followed Colonello._

"It seems like she followed you Colonello..." the baby with the yellow pacifier muttered, accusing my trainer.

"Yeah yeah..." Colonello muttered annoyed. "What are you doing here?" he questioned to me.

"I was bored. So can you guys explain the baby thing? I mean...where the hell did you get guns and...whatever that thing is?" I rebutted, pointing at the baby with the yellow pacifier's green lizard like thing.

As one, they withdrew their weapons. "My name is Reborn," the baby with the yellow pacifier declared. Talk about mood swings. One second he wants to kill me, the next he wants to introduce himself. "We are the Arcobaleno."

"The rainbow?" I asked in a disbelieving tone.

"Of course not! We're the seven strongest babies in the-" the one with the purple pacifier started; but Reborn kicked him in the head. Ouch.

"We are the strongest babies in the mafia world. It's not good to eavesdrop on other people's conversations you know," Reborn lectured.

I bent my head down in apology. "I'm sorry...I was just curious."

The baby with the red pacifier smiled warmly. "They always said curiosity killed the cat."

"And satisfaction brought it back," I argued.

Reborn. Colonello. Lal Mirch. Fon. Skull. Viper. They were intimidating, but appeared friendly enough. Lal and Colonello were a little 'overly aggressive', Skull was arrogant (though I like the others pretty much ignored him), Fon was the calmest, Viper kept to himself (though when he spoke, it was usually money related) and Reborn had a weird sense of maturity and leadership in the group.

"I expected to die five minutes ago," I murmured. "Not that I'm not grateful, but why am I still alive?"

"We wanted to talk to you anyway," Lal shrugged.

"Me? Why?" I asked confused.

"To test how good Colonello's training skills are." Reborn smirked. Oh no. That was an evil smile. Not good.

* * *

><p>"You call running?" Colonello barked at me. I figured he wouldn't be happy if I embarrassed him in front of his...colleagues, so I tried to make him look good. His orders seemed to go on forever.<p>

"So. What do you think?" Colonello smirked at the other Arcobaleno.

"Considering you've only met her for about a month and she was a total disaster before, that's pretty impressive..." Fon admitted.

"The legendary Skull would've – " Skull began.

"I have to say, I thought she would've failed that exam," Reborn mused, interrupting Skull, much to the latter's annoyance. Colonello did a double take.

"You knew about that?" Colonello raised an eyebrow.

"I have my ways."

"It's true that she's pretty smart; and more mature than we expected her to be; but it's still not good enough," Lal muttered.

"Seriously, you should offer some more encouragement; that's all it takes to make a student happy, kora," Colonello whined.

"It's impossible!" Lal insisted, looking away.

At that point, I crashed the conversation and collapsed next to Skull. "So...can you answer my question now?"

"What question?" Lal growled, still facing Colonello.

"Why exactly are you telling me all this? Seriously, if you people are anything like Colonello, then you should be like super babies. I'm sure I've dropped in on some ultra secret meeting, so...?" I pointed out.

"You're going to have to pay me for an answer..." Viper shrugged. All other Arcobaleno rolled their eyes at him.

"Does there have to be a reason for a conversation?" Fon asked.

"Yes."

"Well, we're bored," Lal decided abruptly. "You're entertainment."

"...No, I'm not."

What I didn't know, and probably never would, was that Luche had prophecy about the Arcobaleno curse before she died. It pretty much was about a girl of serenity born in the tenth generation through luck, who would be the key to solving the Arcobaleno curse.

Which meant me.

* * *

><p>Just before the Arcobaleno parted their separate ways, Colonello said something to Lal Mirch; who blushed and then slapped him.<p>

"Just try to be more lady like kora!" Colonello yelled after her, cheesy grin plastered on his face. The red mark was a clear sign of his failure.

* * *

><p>That night, Squalo had a surprise for me – a hiking trip with Dino. No adult supervision and definite fun. It had been Dino's father's idea; to 'man up his son'. After all, Dino's nickname was pipsqueak Dino.<p>

And that's how I found myself, following Dino and Squalo as we spent many happy hours observing nature. The plan was simple: hike, have a swim, hike some more, stay for the night, come back. We had all the all the necessities – but to help with the weight, we left the tent, satellite phone, and flares. It was only _one _night.

We hiked for about two hours; and arrived at a waterhole by noon. It was a secluded place; rock rose high above on all sides, and a mini waterfall stood in front of us. The water was crystal clear.

Immediately the guys changed, and jumped into the water – which was unfortunately only about a metre high.

"Aaaahhhhh that hits the spot," Dino sighed contently, resurfacing. He'd just missed the bed of the lake.

"VOI! That was fricking painful!" Squalo roared, massaging his leg, his voice echoing. They both turned to look for me – and I was just standing at the edge, in shorts and a t-shirt.

"Come on Serena. Get in the water – it's boiling today!" Dino invited.

"Yeah! And we've been walking for the last two hours!" Squalo pointed out.

"I...I can't swim," I confessed.

Squalo rolled his eyes. "Pffft. You can't even drown in water this shallow!"

"Yeah, we'll teach you!" Dino insisted.

And so, we stayed there until the warmest part of the day had passed. By then, I'd learnt how to swim a short distance.

For the rest of the day, we wandered around, looking at things left and right; crap like that. At one point we passed a sign that said 'Danger. Do not enter' but we ignored it. As Squalo logically said "If it's so dangerous, where's the electric fence and barbed wire?"

We crashed at an empty clearing, ate some cold rations and lay in our sleeping bags, staring at the sky.

"I've never seen so many stars..." I muttered more to myself.

"It is nice; isn't it?" Dino reasoned. "You guys have fun today?"

"Loads..." Squalo answered, trying to hold back a yawn.

"You know what would be cool? If we did this like every holiday...just the three of us," I commented.

"Let's do that!" Dino approved. "Rain or shine, freezing or burning."

"Until the day we die," Squalo said thoughtfully, and in a matter of seconds started snoring. Dino and I held back a few sniggers.

"Shouldn't we light a fire?" I asked.

"Why? It's boiling!" Dino laughed.

"If you say so..." I said unsure. Why did that naggy feeling in my brain tell we should've?

That night, I dreamt of Alexandra. Yet again. Except this time she was watching a T.V program. Man vs. Wild. It was all right I suppose...but watching a guy continuously eat bugs and animals raw was just a little...disturbing.

And then the happiness ended.

* * *

><p>"Did you hear that?" I whispered, sitting up suddenly.<p>

"Hear what?" Squalo groaned back. Dino put his hands on his ears.

"Wolves!" I muttered frantically.

"It's just your imagination...get back to sleep..." Squalo grumbled, starting to doze off again.

There was another howl, followed by several barks. Squalo and Dino snapped up. "Do you think they're after us?" Dino blurted.

"I've heard that wolves don't attack people a lot these days..." Squalo mumbled back.

"They sound really close. Can we pack up and leave?" I muttered nervously. The barking grew a little louder.

"Hurry!" Squalo hissed, getting to his feet swiftly. When we were ready to go, the first of the wolves came into view.

It may've been midnight, but the moon was full, and it's essence made the wolves eyes glow. They were just about my height, and looked extremely intimidating from my point of view.

"Um...so Squalo, you being the genius on wolves; what should we do? Run? Don't run?" Dino proposed.

"I don't know! Here, take my pocketknife!" Squalo threw over the blade – why he would give a dangerous weapon to Dino...I would ever know. He drew his sword. The number of wolves grew to about eight, began circling the three us, fangs bared and growling.

Then one of them pounced forward.

It had been going for me, and for a second, I was just pissed. It had chosen me because I was the weak one. No weapon, small and I probably looked incapable. I was about to run, but Squalo appeared in front of me and stabbed it in the neck. It whimpered, dropped to the floor and became still.

The remaining wolves charged in, furious that we'd probably killed their 'comrade'. I highly doubted they would listen to reason - they started it.

Dino was running in circles. Squalo was in battle with three wolves at the same time. And I was rooted on the spot.

"Serena!" Dino choked out, pointing behind me. I swivelled around, and saw that another wolf had targeted me. Again. It ran up, and began to pounce. Time suddenly slowed down, and everything was in slow motion.

_Plans...plans...plans..._ Plan A: Run. No...there wasn't enough time. Plan B: Attack. No weapons. Plan C: Duck. Yeah, it'd probably work? As I dropped flat on the floor, I felt the air above me become disturbed. Risking a glance, I saw the underside of a wolf fly above.

As soon as it was out of the way, I stood up again, and the two of us circled, both waiting for the other make a move. It lost patience, and ploughed forward. I didn't think it'd fall for the 'drop to the floor' move again, so I jumped over it. Unfortunately, I landed on the wolf, backwards.

It thrashed around wildly, and eventually, the wolf managed to throw me off. I landed badly, rolling around over and over. I felt my arm go numb and vision blur. Pain...

The next few seconds only partially made sense. The wolf was barely a metre away from me when Squalo kicked it out of the way and stabbed it. I tried to get up, but my head felt like a sack of potatoes. Squalo was alive...and so was Dino. But there was still one wolf left, and it charged at Dino.

Dino, panicked, threw the knife at the wolf. It missed by miles. The wolf was probably laughing its brains out.

Squalo and I could only stare as it pounced onto him. Squalo managed to whack it off before it started to bite, but I could already see deep scratches on Dino's shoulders and chest.

"VOI! We've got to get out of here! Dino! Are you okay?" Squalo yelled, dragging Dino to his feet. Almost immediately he swayed.

I ran to our supplies; and hastily tipped everything out of our three bags. I stuffed a medical kit, as much water as I could carry, flashlights, food and matches into a bag. With one hand, I grabbed the map; the other, the compass.

"Let's move," Squalo informed, and we tried to put as much distance between us and the wolves as we could. _  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>An hour later...<em>

"That's far enough..." Squalo muttered, carefully putting Dino on the floor. We were standing on a cliff ledge which looked down onto the waterhole where we had been the previous day. So we'd just gone in a great big circle. Brilliant.

At least we'd lost the wolves right? But Dino was pretty damn injured. And we had no safe way getting back.

I paid more attention on Dino. His shirt was ripped, and there were three distinct lines which raked across his shoulder. But he was lucky – it had missed all the major arteries.

Rushed, I grabbed out the medical kit. Most of it was meant for me when I packed it – precautionary that is. I tried to remember what to do. Pain medication.

"Squalo! Give me a hand will you?" I muttered, taking out a syringe. Morphine first...and then disinfection. Even though he was unconscious, I saw Dino wince. Taking a deep breath, I started stitching.

* * *

><p><em>Somewhere in the Cavallone estate...<em>

Dino's father was having an important meeting. In fact – if this went badly, his family would lose ownership of the Ferrari logo.

_Beep, beep, beep_

Dino's father stared at the vibrating phone on the table. Romario...he wouldn't have called unless it as important, right?

"I'm sorry, I have to take this call..." Dino's father muttered to the two representatives.

Exiting the room, he picked up the call. He didn't even have time to say 'ciao' before Romario began. "_Boss! The young master and his friends haven't come back from their hiking trip!_"

Oh. So that's what it was about. "It's fine. They're probably just having more fun."

"_But Boss, they don't have the resources_," Romario tried to emphasize.

"Take a search party then!" Dino's father hung up. It could wait, right?

* * *

><p><strong>Have a nice day; Ciao :]<strong>


	6. New Experiences

Chapter 6 - New Experiences

I shivered. It may've been the middle of summer, but _damn_ it could rain.

Squalo, Dino and I were taking shelter in a cave – and we even managed a fire. Good news? Dino gained consciousness. He may've lost a lot of blood, but he still smiled and joked, which was a good thing.

The bad news? Squalo got us lost.

"My instincts tell me that we'll just die if we stay here!" Squalo said, convinced.

"Were these the same instincts that told you 'wolves don't attack people'?" I mocked, sitting down on a boulder.

"Either way, we're going to have to do something. We ditched the food, there's barely any water and Dino needs actual medical attention."

"Way to state the obvious, Sherlock."

"So, remind me, we've been lost for how long?" Dino sighed.

"At least eight hours," Squalo growled, irritated. "Who's hungry?"

"We're all hungry Squalo...do you have to keep on bringing that up?"

"How long can a human survive without food?" I questioned, simply out of boredom.

"About a month – so we'll live for another twenty nine days," Squalo joked. I didn't get it.

"We're going to be stuck here for twenty nine days? I don't want to die in this hell hole!" I panicked.

"Serena...Squalo was trying to crack a joke. We'll be out of here tomorrow," Dino reassured.

"Don't you think it's just in the slightest odd that we get attacked by wolves and utterly lost on a mountain that's fool proof? Honestly, how on Earth did we get in this mess?" I insisted.

"Fate," Dino muttered. "Look on the bright side. My Dad's the boss of the Cavallone family. They're probably out searching for us now."

"I kind of expected them to find us already. The Cavallone's huge, right?" Squalo pointed out. "How hard could it be to find three kids?"

"Fate?" Dino suggested innocently.

I snorted and closed my eyes. Dino and his fate...honestly... I yawned and curled up in Squalo's lap. I was asleep in seconds.

* * *

><p><em>Elsewhere...<em>

Dino's father paced the room, annoyed. Several hours ago, he had dismissed the idea, but the possibility that his son was missing was increasing.

The life of a mafia boss' son was not easy.

Dino could've been kidnapped. Sabotaged. Set up. Assassinated. Or lost. Either option left room for error.

_Beep beep beep_

"Romario. Any news?"

"_We've had contact with one of the search parties ..._" Romario tried to explain.

"What is it?" Dino's father asked sternly.

"_We think they've wandered onto a restricted section of the mountain..._" Romario paused. "_And they seemed to have encountered wolves_."

"But it's meant to be a completely danger free mountain!"

"_Well that is true – there's a 'danger, do not enter' sign next to the area you're not meant to go..._" Romario shrugged.

"Then why would they walk past it? They're not stupid!"

"_I'm sorry Boss, we don't know. They've left the majority of their things behind...but we're pretty sure that they're fine_," Romario tried to reassure.

"If it's a danger zone, get everyone out and search by air," Dino's father ordered.

"_Yes boss!_"

* * *

><p><em>Elsewhere in Italy...<em>

"I've got a hit!" our mother said excitedly.

"What is it?" our father muttered, spinning in his chair to look at her.

"The day after the exam, Shamal went on a date!"

"What's that perverted guy got to do with anything? He has a different date every what - twenty minutes?"

"Nothing! But think of it this way – the only possible reason Shamal would ever take a hit on a little girl would be a date right? Guess who employed his date?" our mother tried to tell my father.

"I have no idea...?" My mother stared at him for a few seconds before moving on.

"It's Squalo's principal!"

"That bastard? I always knew he was out to get Squalo! I bet you he didn't deserve half those detentions..." our father swore, slamming his hand on the table.

"And if Serena failed, we'd all be executed," our mother put together slowly.

"So what do we do?"

"Use the law."

* * *

><p><em>Back to somewhere in the forest...<em>

"I'm not eating that," I muttered, eyeing the berries in Squalo's hand carefully. The sun just returned the next morning with hunger. You'd think they'd wear off after a couple hours of starvation.

At least it was still relatively cloudy. I was half expecting it to rain again any second now...

"I assure you, these berries are 100% edible," Squalo insisted, eating one himself. He would've fooled me – if I ignored the gagging that immediately afterwards.

"And I suppose you're gagging because you accidentally choked on your own spit..." Dino teased.

"Oh shut up..." Squalo replied indignantly. "They're just sour."

"Let's just go catch a fish or something. Some random furry animal - " I brainstormed.

"Just don't say wolves..." Dino whined.

"That's a great idea!" Squalo said triumphantly. "We killed like eight of those right?"

"I admit...I would rather starve than watch you hack up a dead wolf and eat it..." I said distastefully.

"I second that motion," Dino nodded.

"Fine then. If you two are so picky, then we'll just starve to death!" Squalo yelled sarcastically. I didn't even know you could yell sarcasm, but Squalo pulled it off.

"Chances are a search party will find us today," Dino proposed.

"By saying that, I think you just jinxed us for another night in this damn place..." I pointed out. "So what now?"

"Twiddle our thumbs and wait?" Dino suggested. Squalo and I stared. "Come on, it's not such a bad idea..."

"Sure, sure..." Squalo muttered. "Since you're not going to eat anything, *insert glare* then we'll have to try and save our energy. Our number one priority is for the search party to find us, so we should make a signal."

There were a few moments of silence. "Did anyone bring a flare gun?" Dino asked brightly.

"Yeah Dino, you expect me to have a flare gun stashed in my pocket. Totally," I rolled my eyes.

"Why don't we start a fire? The smoke will probably be a great signal!" Squalo planned.

"What if you accidentally start a forest fire?" I questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"Pfft. Like I'm that stupid. Come on, help me find some dry wood."

* * *

><p><em>Somewhere on a Cavallone helicopter...<em>

"Romario! Do you see anything?" The pilot yelled over the whirring of the rotors.

"No...wait! Look over there! Is...is that smoke?"

* * *

><p>Of course Squalo started a forest fire. Okay, it was partially Dino's fault too. And mine. We circled rocks around the campfire – because that's what the ones on T.V and books always looked like. But the rocks had been wet and unfortunately, exploded. It's not like they taught you that in school. How were we meant to know?<p>

Somehow, Dino got hit by a flying chunk of rock, walked into the fire, set his socks on fire, threw them off onto a tree and amazingly, everything began to burn. I tried to put it out by fanning it with a branch – but fire only grows with more oxygen. And so, we found ourselves running away...yet again.

"Run downhill! Fire travels faster uphill!" Squalo yelled behind his shoulder.

"Is that a fact or instinct?" Dino shot back, trying to run.

"Just do it!" Squalo roared. The air was already thick with smoke – breathing was definitely more difficult. I would have to say, we definitely succeeded with signalling someone. Except the signal was so big, it was completely ineffective.

Behind us, we could just see a few glowing embers, and...a horde of animals. Of course. Every living animal would be running away from this place.

"Holy shit! Is that a bear?" Dino panicked.

"Don't be stupid, there shouldn't be any..." Squalo laughed, and turned to face Dino. "OH MY CHRIST, run faster Dino!"

"Leave it – it's just running!" I choked, as it overtook us.

In the end, it was the bear that warned us. Up ahead, there was a clearing, but we could barely see. The bear ran a few steps...then disappeared.

"Stop!" Squalo warned, skidding to a halt. Instinctively, I stopped moving altogether and fell next to him. Dino crashed right into him - it was a miracle they didn't fall off the bloody cliff.

We were stuck on a cliff edge. Yes, another cliff edge.

"If we fall, we die. If we move, we die. If we don't move, we die," Squalo rationalised.

"Why is there never an option where we DON'T die?" I yelled, frustrated.

"Well...it looks like this is it. I suppose this is fate," Dino said sadly. "It hasn't been long, but thank you for being my friends."

"You're saying your goodbyes already?" Squalo shouted. His tone suddenly changed. "Well, in that case, you've been a great friend Dino. Serena, you've been a pretty cool sister. I guess if I die now, then I'll have no regrets."

I looked up into the sky. What was that sound? It sounded familiar...

"Aren't you going to say anything?" Dino asked. "I mean like, we've both said something nice..."

"Dino. Do the world a favor and shut up for a second," I muttered. Whirring...that only left one option. Helicopter. Holy fuck. "Look!" I shouted, pointing to a blurry dot in the sky.

"Oh my God...is that...is that a helicopter?" Squalo whispered.

"We're saved!" Dino cheered. "Hey! Over here!" he yelled, waving his arms.

I turned around – more bad news. The fire was definitely getting closer. And a bunch of wolves were running in our direction...they were only blobs, but they were running pretty fast. The helicopter began to descend.

Up above, Romario's head popped out of the cabin door. "Young master! We can't land, so we're throwing down a ladder!" he called, and threw down the flimsy thing. Squalo went first, helping Dino as of his wounded shoulder.

"Serena!" Squalo yelled at me. "Get on the damn ladder!"

All right, I was only partially scared of the fire. And the maniac wolves. What really got to me was the ladder...one second it was swaying on the cliff edge, the next about two metres from it. I seriously didn't want to die in a boring way. Falling off a cliff was hardly exciting. Death by being mauled to death on the other hand...

"Please hurry up Miss!"

Oh what the hell. I ran forward, jumped, and missed. At least my legs caught the last rung. Now upside down, I saw a few wolves run off the cliff.

When they hauled me up, I'd had enough blood in my head to think straight for the first time in hours. "I'm not one to usually say this; but I did tell you about that 'danger do not enter' - those berries were totally inedible and I'm sure I did say you would start a forest fire," I stated. "Just saying."

After a few awkward seconds, Squalo spoke. "Do you still want to do this next term?" he asked Dino. They both grinned.

"Totally."

Urgh. Boys.

* * *

><p><em>Several hours later...<em>

"Oh god...I hate ties," someone whispered.

"I just don't see why we have to wear suit in the middle of summer..." another familiar voice growled.

"My dad's the Boss; it's disrespectful if we don't dress up a little."

"Remind me, why are we meeting your Dad?"

"It's more of a...'I want to meet my son's savior' sort of thing."

"Urgh. Why does Serena have to go?"

"Uh...she saved me too?"

"I'm telling you, she's not good with formalities..."

"Don't worry...she's an adorable kid. Should we wake her?"

"She's already awake Dino."

I sat up. "How do you always know that?" I accused.

"Super powers," Squalo muttered. "You feeling all right?" I nodded, but winced as my arm got pins and needles.

"About that thing - I'll pass." I yawned, and took a good look around, and gaped. This one room was practically bigger than my whole house put together. Dino and Squalo were both dressed in suits and well...they looked cool.

"Come on; just the once!" Dino pleaded. "You can't really say no to my Dad..."

"I'm three. He'll understand." I stood up.

"Just go. I mean, you don't really want the Cavallone family on your bad side," Squalo pointed out. "Then you'd actually have no future."

"It won't be that bad – honestly. And we'll be there!" Dino tried to persuade. My stomach rumbled, and Dino grinned. "Did we mention it's lunch?"

NO. You most certainly did _not_.

* * *

><p>I don't really know what I was expecting. One half of my brain considered a small family sized room and a small dining table. The other half visioned an extremely long dining table with ten metres between everyone.<p>

On a normal day, the dining table would've been over ten metres long, though today it had been shortened to about four. This was a 'casual' meal, so Dino and his father would be sitting on one side of the table, Squalo and I at the other.

When Dino's father entered, Squalo and Dino quickly stood up respectively. I hastily got to my feet, suddenly very aware on how short I was.

"Please, sit down."

My first impression? Old. He seemed more suited for one of those kind grandfathers you always hear about but never really seem to meet.

"So...Superbi and Serena...how exactly did you meet my son?" Dino's father wondered out loud.

Of course I answered honestly. "I fell on him and broke my wrist."

"You're not meant to say that," Squalo muttered under his breath.

"I mean, later, I met him while I was in hospital, and I thought he was a kidnapper," I added in afterthought. "It was great, until he tripped and split my stitches."

Dino sunk lower into his chair.

...Was I not meant to say that? Oops.

To my surprise, the old guy laughed. "Amazing isn't it? Fate that is..." Well, at least I found out where Dino got his conversation tactics from.

After a few minutes of small talk, an appetizer was served. Salmon Canapés. I'd never eaten salmon raw – I didn't like cream cheese and never had caviar, but I pretended to enjoy it. Squalo and Dino actually seemed to like eating raw fish and eggs, which were probably still alive and riddled with bacteria.

Dino's Dad shared a bit about himself. In most cases, when a parent starts off with 'when I was young', everyone kind of goes 'here we go again...'. However, in the case of a Mafioso, the stories were on a different level. Watching Dino blush and try to hide under the table was pretty amusing.

The second course was a salad. I was still starving. What was so fancy about these meals if you were still hungry after two expensive courses?

By the third course, our discussion had reached to the point of our epically failed hiking trip. What did they serve? Pasta. In Italy. How creative. At least desert was nice.

* * *

><p>After an hour or so, Dino's father finally realized how tired we all were, and sent someone to drive us home. The guy had left a newspaper on the back seat.<p>

"Oh my fuck," Squalo muttered, flipping a few pages.

"Anything important?..." I asked, waiting for him to answer. Instead he just passed the newspaper to me. "Um...Squalo? I can't read that well yet."

Squalo snapped out of his shock. "Oh right….I forgot. I'll read it to you."

_"As of today, half of the Dolmite mountains was set alight, though was put out by heavy rainfall. The cause of the fire points to a group of children who were lost on a hike, and will not be named. However, their venture has made the Vongola family realize the dangerous potential this mountain holds._

_From this day forth, the Dolmite Mountain belongs to the Vongola family, and will serve as a training facility. It has been renamed 'Death Mountain'. Upgrades will be made; all trespassers will be shot. Have a nice day._

_Yours sincerely,_

_Vongola Ninth."_

Immediately afterwards, I burst into laughter.

Unknown to us, there was another story that involved us.

_"The principal of Mafia Elementary aka 'Hell's Snake' has been arrested through claims and evidence of child abuse. The sentence is lifelong. The principal position for Mafia Elementary is currently open, apply by contacting the Vongola family."_

Once we got home, I slept like I was dead.

The next morning, Squalo and I got a surprise. Our parents were back. A whole month of walking back and forth to a dry cleaner's, going to restaurants, or mini–lockdowns every time Colonello went to get a glass of water in the middle of the night had left us exhausted.

Unfortunately, the only predictable about life is its unpredictability; as the holidays ended, I began school.

* * *

><p>"Now, if anything's wrong, first you go to Squalo, THEN a teacher. Okay?" my mother insisted, straightening my tunic yet again.<p>

"Don't forget to eat your apple," my father lectured.

"Do you remember your teacher's name?"

"School ends at three thirty - "

"Make lots of friends - "

"Smile - "

"VOI! She gets it!" Squalo growled, steering me towards the hall.

"Thanks Squalo...I never knew our parents could be so...protective," I whispered.

"Pffft. You should've seen my first day of school. Actually, that was the day you were born," Squalo recalled thoughtfully.

"Really? Did things go smoothly?" I asked casually, eyeing everything around me carefully.

"Well...Dad had to take Mom to the hospital, so I was late. I had a fight with the teacher and I got detention. Then Dad accidentally forgot to pick me up and - " Squalo ticked off his fingers.

"Wait! All that's going to happen to me?" I panicked, attempting to run back to my parents.

He grabbed my collar before I made three feet. "That's just MY first day. I mean, what could possibly go wrong?" Squalo reassured. Above us, a bell suddenly rang. I flinched and punched Dino in the face (who just happened to walk by us at the moment).

"I was going to say 'ciao'..." he complained, rubbing his cheek.

"Sorry Dino..." I murmured. "The bell surprised me."

"I'm going to take Serena to the hall; I'll meet you in a few minutes," Squalo said hurriedly, leading me into a room filled packed with kids who were barely older than myself.

"Don't be late Squalo! I'm not sure how many more detentions your record can hold!" Dino joked as we walked away.

As we walked into the hall, one of the teacher started to yell at Squalo. He ignored her. "All right, here's a map." He shoved a handmade map into my bag, and took out a rubber band and a few pieces of folded paper. "You load like this, then fire." The folded paper flew at least thirty feet meters. "If anyone's mean to you, shoot them. See you at morning break!" he whispered, leaving me very much alone.

* * *

><p>I was determined to make a good first impression.<p>

There was the boring welcome speech of course, and then we were split into classes. A few people were chatting with each other – the rest of the year like me kept their mouths shut and tried not to fidget too much.

A nurse had explained to me that having both ADHD and autism cancelled out some of the negative aspects; but it would probably be tough to conform. She was right. If anyone paid attention, they would've noticed that my chair had been bent out of shape.

The first class activity was an introduction - our name and what we wanted to be. No big deal right? Well, our teacher sat us down in a circle and we went round. Unfortunately, I was going last, and I was sitting right next to the teacher. So I was basically killing myself trying not to pull out Squalo's slingshot and shoot the next person who said they wanted to be hitman or marry some rich guy.

When my turn FINALLY came, I stood up. "Je m'appelle Serena di Squalo."

"Um...sweetie, Italian please, we learn French next semester," my teacher said kindly.

"Oh! Sumimasen," I started. Wait...that was Japanese. Right...okay. This time I got it right.

"My name is Serena di Squalo. When I grow up, I want to be alive." My teacher gave up.

* * *

><p>At noon, we had lunch. I sat with Squalo, Dino and a few other guys from their class. They didn't seem to mind me being there.<p>

"You look pale, Serena. Are you okay?" Dino asked.

I sighed. "I screwed up the introduction, and we've just been playing boring games," I complained. "I thought school would be more entertaining."

"You should be happy!" one of the other guys laughed. "Being in kindergarten is way cooler than learning about algebra!"

"What exactly did you do wrong in your introduction?" Squalo questioned.

"I forgot how to speak Italian..." I sighed. "And there was something wrong with my future job idea." There were a few smirks.

"It's better than our first day. Do you guys remember what Squalo said?"

One of the guys stood up, and did a weird impression. "VOI! My name is Squalo! You can all go screw yourselves!"

"VOI! I didn't say that!" Squalo butted in. That only made us laugh harder. "Well...if you're going to laugh, go laugh at Dino."

"What exactly did happen? I can't really remember..." someone muttered.

"Dino forgot his own name, said he wanted to be a toilet, tripped and knocked over the teacher's coffee," a guy smirked, and we all cracked up.

"Then what did you say you wanted to be?" Dino challenged, nudging me gently.

"Alive." Our heads all whipped around to see my teacher.

"You! It's been a while..." Squalo managed to say without swearing out loud. A vein twitched on his forehead.

"Juniors are not allowed in this area," she said sternly, grabbing me by the wrist.

Squalo looked like he was about to do something, but instead refrained himself, wished me a good day, telling me he would pick me up at day's end.

"Ciao!" I smiled, waving at Squalo and the other whilst being dragged away by my teacher.

"God I hate her..." Squalo growled as soon as we were out of earshot.

"Why? She's really nice!" Dino muttered, confused.

"She gave me three years detention for swearing at her mother by accident...I mean - how was I meant to know her mother worked as a supermarket security guard?" Squalo ranted.

They all had a good laugh at that one.

* * *

><p>Later that day, our parents picked us up. Of course, we all waited for Squalo to finish detention first, but he was getting really good at those push ups.<p>

"How was your first day?" they pestered.

"It was alright..."

"Did anything else happen?" Squalo asked sharply beside me.

"Is it really that wrong to want to be 'alive' in the future?" I muttered.

"Well...it's a little odd to say something like that especially when you're still a kid..." our mother tried to say.

"And it's not actually a job..."

Squalo put an arm around my shoulder, and threw a thumbs up at me. "I never really like Miss Marino. She thought I was mentally disturbed when I said I wanted to join an assassination squad before I was fifteen."

"You honestly wanted to join an assassination squad?" our parents yelled, shocked, in unison.

"VOI! That was like four years ago!"

* * *

><p><strong>Anyway, please have a nice day; ciao! :]<strong>


	7. Life Sucks

Chapter 7 - Life Sucks

I really should congratulate myself. I actually made friends. Though technically speaking, they made friends - I just sat there.

Marie Marionette was definitely an odd person. Take our first encounter.

"Bonjour! My name is Marie Marionette – I heard you speak French. Did you know I'm from France? Let's be friends!" she babbled brightly.

"Bonjour...Marie. M.M yeah?" I replied.

"M.M?" she asked confused.

"Well that your initials right? M.M?"

"I never realised that! You know what – M.M sounds way cooler than Marie. Call me M.M," she insisted.

"Sure...M.M..."

The other friend we made was a guy. He actually seemed like a loner – sitting in the corner and drawing. M.M made first contact. "Hi! My name's M.M, and she's Serena. Wanna be friends?"

He was just as confused as me. "Sure...my name's Solte..." he muttered awkwardly.

"You have nice drawings – are you an artist?" I smiled, trying to be nice. He really was a good artist.

Immediately, he pulled the book up to his chest, hiding his sketch. "What drawing?" he tried to say innocently.

"That one dummy..." M.M laughed, and sat down next to him. "May I?"

Begrudgingly, he handed over the book. "It's not really that good...I have ADHD so this is the only thing that keeps my mind busy..." he admitted.

"This is amazing!" M.M gawked, flipping through the pages.

"You've got talent. I've got ADHD too," I reassured with a smile. And that's how our friendship began.

* * *

><p>Over the following weeks, life began to squeeze itself into a schedule. School. Piano. Training.<p>

Colonello had started close combat with me, but I was a failure at every turn. My form was perfect – but I was so weak, it wasn't even funny. I couldn't hit a punch bag without cracking my knuckles or do one lousy push up. But Colonello was adamant.

It was hard to fail when your super baby tutor says something like 'You don't sleep or eat until you do a push up!' and then takes a nap while pointing a gun that shoots fireballs at you.

On the remainder of the days, I spent time with my newly made friends – or with Dino or Squalo. They were great role models...in a way that is. We still went on our crazy trips – rock climbing, abseiling, flying fox, rope courses; just pretty much everything that triggered my hatred for heights.

If I was left to myself, I would read. I loved reading - stories, information, history - it was interesting. It was annoying with dyslexia, but I was getting a little better. It was only the occasional phrase I learnt wrong - eg. 'I have dyslexia' seemed to always turn into 'I have daily sex'.

My nickname at school was 'Lucky 13'. Why? Because every week, I would have an accident. And these accidents weren't even explainable. During only my first few weeks, I:

# Fell out of a locked window (the lock was rusted).

# Slipped on a piece of paper and fell down the stairs (it was camouflaged with the carpet).

# Got stabbed by a pair of blunt scissors (it wasn't the best idea to run with a pair of scissors and then trip on your shoelace).

# Hit in the gut by an exploding overinflated soccer ball (pay attention to your friend who says 'think fast' when your focused on eating a banana).

# Being the only person in the entire school to get a seizure during vaccination day (try not to go back for the same injection four times because you like the thrill of getting a needle).

# Forgetting how Squalo loaded a slingshot and shoot yourself in the eye (release the hand CLOSER to you, not the one FURTHER from you).

However, halfway through the year – there were parent teacher interviews. My parents hated these interviews – normally they were completely pointless, a waste of time an unbelievably boring.

I considered that to be the worst day of the year.

My school (to entertain the parents) held a show – and unfortunately, attendance was mandatory. This year, my class was the first act – singing. The parents may've been Mafioso, but the ones in the front were really enthusiastic and most had video cameras.

By now, my teacher had figured that it might not be best to put me in spotlight, in case some 'incident' occurred. So she shoved me at the back. That was her mistake. Having autism, I'd always had trouble with tying my shoes. Sure, I could tie them...but they became undone so often; I just didn't bother.

"You are my sunshine,  
>My only sunshine,<br>You make me happy,  
>When skies are grey..."<p>

M.M was standing beside me, and winked. Why was she winking? Turns out she wasn't winking at me. She was winking at Solte, who was standing on my other side. What did he do? Push me over.

The previous day, we had a bet. I said that I wouldn't embarrass myself publicly. They bet otherwise. So I tripped, knocked over three or four people in front of me – and it was pretty much like a Mexican wave.

Oddly enough, I was somehow the only person to fall off the stage. Not only that, but I fell on top the principal, broke the microphone, destroyed four video cameras and became the centre of attention for being a klutz. Just brilliant.

Then there was the ACTUAL interview. Thankfully, I didn't have to be there, but I guessed it didn't go well. Why else would my parents say 'Serena – you're grounded'?

I guessed it had something to do with six months of lying that I just 'tripped' and got a bruise – not really 'I like having injections so I had four of the same and had a seizure...no big deal'.

* * *

><p>Nonetheless, by the end of the year, I was a very beat up kid. My grades were all right I guess. But as my teacher said: "I can't let you skip first grade if you can't spell, constantly swear, catch a ball, beat yourself up or lose focus every two minutes;" which I found totally unfair.<p>

At least I got a class award; 'Serena di Squalo, the most accident prone'. Arguably, it was better than 'the sports freak' or 'the writing fanatic'.

Squalo on the other hand, passed fifth grade with flying colours – his grades were practically perfect, and he would be attending high school after the school holidays. Dino scraped through fifth grade.

Colonello left. Well...he had to. Apparently, he had a job at 'mafia island' which was meant to be a holiday resort, so I have no idea what he was REALLY doing. At least he'd trained me to the best of his capabilities. I could do all those fancy moves they had in movies...in air.

When the new school year started (yet again), my parents signed me up for tutoring in practically everything. After school extra credit, martial arts classes; things that were just utterly annoying. And just for extra measure, they forced me to spar with Squalo.

"Mom and Dad...well, you know," Squalo apologized in advance, spinning his sword casually.

"Just get it over with...it's only one go right?" I pointed out, struggling to hold the bloody thing up.

"All right. First person to get cut loses!" he decided, charging forward.

"What?" I panicked. _I can't outrun him...oh what the hell. _So I charged too. Squalo raised his sword. I copied. It was a bad idea – because our swords clashed and he pushed me back fifteen feet and into a tree. "All right Squalo, you win..." I sighed, sitting up and brushed off my tunic.

"Actually...you won..." Squalo said surprised, showing me a few cut hairs.

"Luck?" I suggested.

"Huh...let's go again then!"

Facepalm.

* * *

><p>To improve my writing skills, my parents insisted that I write a diary – until I 'improved'. I just didn't see the point of the thing. This was my first entry:<p>

_Dear Diary_

_My name is Serena di Squalo, and I'm five. If you think my name's bad, my brother's literally means 'prideful shark'. Well, arguably, 'serene shark' isn't much better. My life sucks. I'm weak. But my Aunt says that people can change. I just hope she's right. _

_Today I accidentally fell down the stairs. Again. M.M and Solte won their bet. Yet again. I think I might start betting against myself. I skipped lunch because I forgot to write my Italian essay and got busted for trying to eat in class._

_After school, I had detention and was the last person left. I couldn't even do ten push ups. So the teacher compromised and let me do a thousand sit ups instead. Equally painful._

_Afterwards, I went to a martial arts class, and got completely beat up by black belts. I'm pretty sure getting punched in the eye has lifelong damage. I suppose the bruises will last for at least a week. When I got home, Squalo almost cut off my finger – but he just missed because I sneezed and ducked._

_Committing suicide seems pretty easy at this point._

How was I meant to know that my parents were going to read it? They made me go to a psychiatrist to be tested for insanity.

* * *

><p>And then my Aunt died.<p>

To be honest, I didn't really know a lot about her; why she was always solemn or that she and my father were half Japanese. But she had taught me many things about life – she was the only extended family I had. I was there when she died.

"So...are you going to tell me where we're going?" I mused.

"That's a surprise! But it's just a...family friend. It's his birthday so I'm giving him a visit," she smiled. I stuck my head out the window as we took another hairpin turn.

"If we fall, we'll probably die," I pointed out.

"Are you insulting my driving skills, Serena?" she grinned. "Don't worry, nothing will happen!"

But of course something happened. Suddenly my Aunt slumped forward, our car lost control, and we were going to crash.

It's ironic. If I'd been wearing my seatbelt, I would've definitely died in the plummeting car. If I hadn't had my window opened to the max so I could've jumped out, I would've died. And if I didn't sneeze immediately afterwards, I would've stood up and be hit by another car. Luckily unlucky.

I never really found out what happened to my Aunt. Rumor is she was assassinated. I knew very damn well she wasn't. Seeing death in person...was something that changed me. I once heard in a movie – 'close your eyes and pretend it's all a bad dream'. Then logically speaking, my life was one fucked up nightmare.

* * *

><p>It wasn't long after that when I cracked. I was getting beat up. Again. By some random guy in my martial arts class. He was a pro kid. I was just a kid.<p>

"Serena di Squalo, will you at least try?" the instructor sighed.

"I am trying!" I hissed, getting up painfully.

"Just saying, I have no problem beating up a girl," my sparring partner joked nastily. We went again. I think I lasted...oh maybe five seconds? "Fail!" he laughed, and the entire class joined in.

I swallowed my embarrassment, and thought seriously for the first time in a while. The reason I was in this mess was because I allowed myself to be pushed around. By Squalo. My parents. Teachers. Well that was the final straw. Screw self control.

"That's it! I'm going to beat the fucking shit out of you!" I swore.

"Aha ha ha – I'd like to see you try..." he beckoned, taking a stance.

My eye twitched. All the anger, pain, frustrations I'd endured in the past year gathered, and I charged. One blow to the neck and he was out cold.

"Just saying, I have no problem beating up guys," I growled, kicked him in the gut, and sat down into the audience. They stared.

From that day, I had a reason to fight - I wasn't going to sit there and let the world beat me up. My reasoning was like the Vongola family's 'dying will'.

My grades improved, my life improved. I started smiling again. But I still was a klutz.

* * *

><p>When I lost my first teeth, Dino taught me about the tooth fairy - Squalo paid the money. I didn't believe their terrible stories about a fairy who kept teeth, but hey, it was funny watching them try. I still remember the day Squalo and Dino were trying to teach me how to ride a bike.<p>

"_These are the brakes – _" _Dino started, showing me the handles._

"_You'll learn more from experience," Squalo insisted, cutting off Dino's explanation._

"_You know..." Dino attempted to say._

"_Just go!" Squalo said knowingly, giving the bike a 'gentle' push._

"_What? Can we start off somewhere flat - _" _I began, just as I lost footing on the floor and started moving. Turns out, the brakes were important. Especially on an extremely steep hill. By the time I was halfway down, the bike was just as fast as a car – and I couldn't stop._

_There was a train crossing at the bottom, and as if life wanted to curse me yet again, the warning bells started. Damn...it was either get hit by a train, or get hit by a car...and then I realised – they hadn't even taught me how to turn. Go figure._

In the end, I decided it would be better to crash into a tree – though the damage was no different. The tree survived. Dino's bike didn't. I ended up with a fractured knee and a dislocated shoulder. The pain had taken four months to wear off.

* * *

><p>Thanks to Alexandra Knight's random dreams, I skipped second grade. As a gift, my parents bought me contact lenses. I may've only been six years old, but my eyesight was already ghastly. They were painful and annoying, and made my eyes were sensitive to sunlight - I often wore hats, even in class. But it was totally worth it.<p>

When Squalo turned twelve, his angst/emo phase began, and so did Dino's. They spent a lot of their time alone together, playing video games, and sleeping. M.M and Solte were in different years, so we spent less time together. So it was a quiet year for me.

The only memorable thing that happened that year was during the winter holidays. I got sick with a bad case of the flu. Not fun. Medication didn't work.

The only solutions the doctors could think of were pills. Feeling sick? Take a pill. Tired? Take a pill. Feel hyper? Take a pill. Dying? Take a pill. Honestly, how these people were made into doctors, I had no idea.

My health was as stable as the stock market. A month after I was admitted to the hospital, I swore I saw one of the Arcobaleno – only this guy had a green pacifier and a lab coat. He gave me an injection, and the following day, I was completely cured. Maybe it was a hallucination.

My grades were good. I skipped my fourth grade.

* * *

><p>In fifth grade, the age gap between me and other students was clear physically. At least I wasn't alone – there was this really weird girl with purple hair called Bianchi. People said she loved some baby, but since we were both misfits, we hung out together.<p>

After a few months, she invited me to her little brother's piano recital. Since I didn't have anything on, or a good excuse, I accepted. We spent most of the morning playing hide and seek in Bianchi's massive castle and baking cookies. Both of us didn't really know how...but we found a recipe book in her kitchen.

"Remind me Bianchi, why exactly are we baking cookies?" I sighed.

"For my brother to eat before his recital!" Bianchi exclaimed cheerfully.

"But...we have no idea how to bake..." I tried to put nicely.

"This recipe is so complicated...I'm not bothered reading this. You wanna just go impromptu?" Bianchi suggested, completely ignoring me.

"So long as I'm not eating it."

* * *

><p><em>Twenty minutes later...<em>

"I'm not eating that..." Gokudera muttered. It was even giving off purple fumes. How was that meant to be safe to eat?

"Don't worry Hayato. My GREAT friend Serena will eat one. Won't she?" Bianchi eyed.

"You want me to eat that? But I'm lactose intolerant!" I lied, panicking.

"I saw you drink strawberry milk yesterday," Bianchi pointed out calmly. "And you know there isn't dairy in this."...I never was good at lying.

"I don't like cookies?"

"You love cookies."

"...I have something against circles."

"Just eat them..."

Munch. "Oh my god, these are really good. Gokudera, you've got to try these!" I grinned. Was it nice? Not really... But it wasn't horrible either.

Still suspicious, her little brother nibbled an edge, and almost immediately keeled over. His performance was of course, a wreck. But everyone else (who knew next to no knowledge of music appreciation) thought it sounded 'modern'.

"Hey Bianchi?" I whispered halfway through the piece.

"What is it Serena?" she whispered back.

"I'm not going to keel over and die right?"

"Of course not!" she replied.

"Why did we put five dead rats into the mixture?" I exasperated. Sure I didn't die, but watching Gokudera was painful enough.

"For flavour. Wasn't it your idea? Trust me, it's fine!" Bianchi stated with a thumbs up.

That was the day Bianchi invented poison cooking. And I realised I was different (well, in the ability to eat poison, not all the other stuff).

* * *

><p>That year ended with a bang. Well, not really. Squalo's emo self disappeared virtually overnight. It was replaced with some overly mature, deep voiced...guy. Not that I had any issues with that. I actually had a brother again.<p>

But then I went to high school.

* * *

><p><strong>The character Solte is actually in the KHR game - but he's pretty much an ordinary partially made up guy. This chapter is just a summary of Serena's primary school life. Now the real mess starts :P<strong>

**Have a nice day; ciao :]**


	8. Good Times, Bad Times

**Thank you for all reviews, they were much appreciated :] ****To MrsRegulusBlack123, your paranoid obsession is correct XD**

**I didn't cover a lot in this chapter, but it shows more heading.**

**Please enjoy :]**

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 8 - Good Times, Bad times<span>

I'm pissed. All my friends from elementary have jobs. Already.

Take Bianchi – she took poison cooking to a whole new level – and for a while got a new boyfriend. I think his name was Romeo or something...anyways, they had a fight and the very next day – he's on the front cover of the newspaper, 'death by food poisoning'. When I asked what she put in it, I think she meant to say 'cola' but it sounded a hell lot more like 'cobra'.

M.M started earning big money dating other eight year old rich guys, and Solte became some sort of a jewellery maker.

Yet I was stuck going to school.

The jump between elementary school and high school was simply just too large. Mafia elementary school was more or less like any other elementary school in the world. Mafia High School wasa living hell. It's purpose was to 'train your child into a respectable mafioso'. Or at least, that's what the brochure said.

So there were no journalists. Fire-fighters. Olympic athletes. Just mafia.

Any subject that wouldn't help you in the future of a Mafioso (let's say maths...) were optional – while things like drama (apparently a Mafioso needed to be able to act cool) were compulsory.

So basically, I had a hard time keeping up.

School started at eight in the morning, and ended at six. I swear, students deserved a standing ovation. As Squalo (14 years old, five foot eight) and I were attending the same school, we decided to pick the 'boader' option; mainly because our parents weren't bothered to take us to and fro; but that's not the point.

Look on the bright side – at least we were allowed to leave the school as often as we wanted (granted that it wasn't during school hours or considering the fact the nearest sign of civilization was an hour's walk away).

* * *

><p>I hated high school from day one. Of course it was a disaster.<p>

Our parents ditched – no wait, 'dropped' us off on the last day of the holidays so we could have some time to 'assimilate' with the area. Squalo and Dino were great guides, no really. I got lost eight times while they were giving me a tour.

Something happened on that tour. My voice became sarcastic. Permanently. It was virtually impossible to sound sincere.

The school may've been filled with the most recent technology, but the building was ancient and seven storeys tall. Once upon a time, it had been Italy's largest prison. And in a way, it still was.

Dino and Squalo shared a 'room'. It was on the same standard as a five star hotel. I on the other hand got the significantly smaller joining room next to them. Seeing I was still a kid, the school heads didn't mind me popping into a guy's room whenever I pleased (unlike these annoying teen girls who couldn't stop trying to break into their room).

* * *

><p>I barely slept at all on that first night, so it was no surprise I felt like I had a hangover the following morning. All right, I'd never actually had a hangover, but it's the thought that counts.<p>

"Serena...Serena! Get up – it's six thirty. Breakfast's in thirty minutes!" Squalo bellowed in my ear.

"Five more minutes..." I mumbled, pulling my covers over my head. Squalo had such a loud voice...

"GET UP!" Squalo barked. I didn't budge.

"Geez Squalo, do you mind keeping it down? I mean, we could've slept in for at least another five minutes..." Dino yawned, walking into my room. I didn't hear much of the next few phrases they spoke, but all of a sudden, my covers flew off, and my curtains were thrown open.

I could feel my pupils contract. "Aarrgghh! 911! Set the cat on fire! Go fuck the carpet!" I jumped up, and kicked Dino and Squalo flying back a few metres.

I never was much of a morning person.

"Tomorrow, you can wake get up on your own..." Dino complained, massaging his head as we ate cereal.

"How many times do you want me to say it? I AM SORRY. If you must blame anyone, blame the idiots next door. They didn't shut up all night," I blamed.

"You know Serena, I can't really tell if you're really sorry – you sound completely sarcastic," Dino muttered thoughtfully. I banged my head on the table.

"So. First day of school. Any tips?"

"Yeah. Stay quiet near the back," Squalo answered, shrugging. "And above all, don't be friendly."

* * *

><p>My first class turned out to be science. It's not like I actually liked science, but my parents picked all my subjects for me. As a victim, I know for a fact that first impressions are extremely important. No exceptions for teachers.<p>

"Good morning! Wait – this is the first year science class right? My name is Mr. Mayo! If you can't remember it, call me Mayonnaise! Now, today we'll be learning about plant se – *cough* I mean, plant reproduction!" my new teacher hyperactively said. "Now, just in case anyone who read the wrong equipment list, hand over all the marijuana."

"...?"

"Hand it all over! And the alcohol too!"

"...Sir, we're twelve..."

"Oh really? I thought you guys were seniors. My bad!"

..._Well well well, __I wonder where confiscated marijuana goes..._

Two painful hours later, the bell finally rang, and I went to my next class – drama. I literally though we would be reading Shakespeare and use 'thou' and 'thy' in every second sentence; but we just played games. Take the 'name game'.

The rules were simple: describe yourself with a word that rhymes or starts with the same letter as your name.

"Ice cream loving Isabel!" a girl started off, twirling in a circle.

"You shouldn't eat ice cream fatso!" a guy from the back called out, earning a few laughs from round the class.

"Felix Felicis~" a guy yelled out, mimicking a wizard waving a wand.

"So cliché dude. You should've said fucked up Felix~" a girl said meanly.

'Felix' stuck out his tongue. "Avada kedavra!"

One by one, the members in my class gave a little intro; which left me.

"Oh God, that one's a midget!" one of the girls gossiped.

"She looks unlucky too. Is she actually in our class?" a guy 'whispered'. I felt offended. I'd been stuck with these retarded people for at least three hours, and they never even realised I was here.

"All right, would you like to introduce yourself?" the teacher asked kindly.

"If you don't mind; I'd rather just keep to myself..." I tried to say casually.

"Are you being sarcastic with me young lady?"

"In this class, I see twenty five hooligans but no ladies or gentlemen," I muttered under my breath. It may've come out a bit louder than I intended.

"What was that?"

"Nothing...nothing..." I sighed. Even that sounded sarcastic.

"Just hurry up and introduce yourself," my teacher ordered impatiently.

"Do I really, _really _have to, Sir? I'd prefer if you just ignored me for the whole year."

"I'm a _woman._"

"Oh. Right. I'm so sorry, Sir."

"_Ma'am_."

"I'm so sorry, man?"

"It's not man, it's ma'am!"

I sighed. "Can I just introduce myself, Sir?"

"No! I mean yes! Hurry up!"

Making a peace sign, I didn't bother smiling. "Sarcastic Serena." And no one could argue with that.

* * *

><p><em>Later that evening...<em>

"I'm hungry!" I whined, shoving open the door to the boy's room

"VOI! Where the fuck were you? It's eight o'clock already!" Squalo fussed, looking up from his book.

"I'm sorry...the nurse forced me to stay at the medical wing for like six hours." I kicked the door shut.

"What were you doing in the medical wing? Rumour is, those who go in don't come back out..." Dino smirked spookily walking out of the bathroom, just finished with his shower.

I snorted before answering. "Burned a few of my fingers in food tech..." I muttered, showing two heavily bandaged hands.

"Isn't food technology meant to be safe?" Squalo wondered, but then seemed to remember who he was talking to. "What'd you do wrong?" he groaned.

"Why is it that you always automatically assume that it was my fault?" I grumbled.

"Because it's highly likely that it WAS your fault," Dino pointed out, shaking his head like a dog.

"VOI! You just got water all over my work!" Squalo stormed.

"Sorry, sorry," Dino apologized quickly. "So, did you leave the gas on Serena?"

"How was I meant to know that you're actually meant to put your hands in an oven mitt? It's not like they put that in the instructions." I argued back defiantly.

"It's called common sense Serena..." Dino sighed, drying his hair with a towel. "It's like, shaped like a hand."

"Tch. If it's so common, why don't I have it?" I muttered sarcastically, making my way towards Squalo's bed. "Have you ever seen an oven mitt? It looks like...a retarded fish."

"Watch where you're - "

*CRASH*. "- going."

"FUCK." I swore, putting pressure on my knee. "POINT TAKEN."

"And you still wonder why you were called 'Lucky 13' since kindergarten..." Squalo tutted, helping me up. "Just a bruise. I told you not to put the couch there Dino..." he muttered over his shoulder.

* * *

><p>I was hungry. I was high on red bull. And I hated high school more than I'd ever hated elementary school. So that night, I sat on my windowsill, staring at the stars.<p>

I thought I'd be up all night, but I must've fallen asleep at some point; when Squalo woke me up the next morning I was tucked in bed with a hell of a bruise on my elbow.

* * *

><p>As days became weeks, home economics became my worst subject. You see, most girls like sewing and making dresses and crap. They loved to cook and bake. Me?...not so much. I don't think it's my fault that I set my tie on fire. And despite what everyone tells me, I still think I'm targeted on by sewing machines.<p>

I bet they're been sent from the future to kill humans.

On a different matter, I earned my rep through close combat. I didn't really have a fighting style, because every martial art had its loop flaws. So going freestyle wasn't so bad. Look at Squalo – he'd been slicing things up for six years and he still hadn't picked a sword style – yet he'd never really lost a fight.

Another important aspect of school turned out to be weapons class. Turns out having Squalo chase you down with a sword every single day for three years in a row actually teaches you partial swordsmanship. _'What do you expect? She's Squalo's sister'_ was the line I kept on hearing. I liked archery, so I juggled the two.

I was quiet, and began to avoid people. People didn't notice me. I didn't notice people. It seemed fair enough. I rarely paid any attention in class, but I did the homework, so teacher's couldn't complain.

I kept on having these dreams about Alexandra Knight...and her boring life. It was more of a nightmare really; so every now and then, I would sleep at the foot of Squalo's or Dino's bed. (Dino's feet don't smell all that bad, but after several painful nights, I realised that he had no control whatsoever of his feet when he was asleep.)

On Sundays, we always went out somewhere – even Squalo stopped training for a day to do something entertaining. It was good fun doing crazy things like swimming in winter (at least when people ask, I can say been there, done that), getting high on weird things like energy drinks or sugar (we almost got arrested), laser tag, shopping (surprise surprise, even guys like shopping more than I do) and bungee jumping (why would a human want to stare death in it's ugly, ugly face?).

It was far from a perfect, but for that brief moment, life was epically awesome.

But as always, good times don't last.

* * *

><p>Squalo and I were planning to go home for the Christmas break to go skiing with our parents. We invited Dino, but he said something like 'it is against my father's wishes'. I just hoped he didn't turn into a Draco Malfoy and say things like 'wait till my father hears about this'.<p>

On the day before we were scheduled to leave, we got an emergency call. Guess who?

Our parents.

They wouldn't even give a proper explanation. Just BAM! 'You guys have to stay at school; don't get into too many fights; look after yourselves; we love you'; hang up. We didn't even get to say 'bye'.

So we spent our holidays with Dino. The three of us were the only people who stayed at school.

When the holidays ended, I felt like I hadn't had a break at all. It'd been exhausting keeping up with Dino and Squalo – one second they were playing computer games, the next they were in the freezing snow throwing snowballs at each other. Guys... *shakes head sadly*

* * *

><p><em>Somewhere on a train...<em>

"What do we do?" our mother exasperated. "We can't hide this from them forever!"

"We'd kept this from them for five years. A little longer won't hurt," our father advised.

"Then what do you suggest we do? If we don't tell them that that asshole of a principal broke out of prison and is probably going to hunt us all down - "

"Then what? They're safe at school. He's coming to kill _us_!" our father insisted.

"But our will...it states that they can't use the money from our bank until Superbi's eighteen – and I don't even think that we'll make the rest of winter."

"I know that. We both agreed that that would be the best idea..." our father sighed.

"They're only children!" our mother practically cried.

"Look, just have a little faith in them; they don't look like much, but you can't judge a book by its - " our father began just as their compartment door slid open.

"How touching..." a man laughed sarcastically, strolling leisurely into their compartment. "Now I'm afraid it's time to die."

That was the time either of our parents were seen alive.

* * *

><p><em>Later that day...<em>

"I swear I had no idea about that accident with Ms. Henshaw!" I rebutted to Squalo. "I mean, it's just convenient that she broke both her legs by slipping in wet paint. Just after, you know, yelling at me for three hours about playing the piano without permission."

"_Convenient_? Don't lie – who do you think washed the blue paint out of your skirt?" Squalo muttered darkly.

"Dino did that? That's so sweet!" I smiled cheerfully. "To think he'd know how to wash clothing."

Squalo facepalmed.

"But I swear on my own grave I had nothing to do with that prank!" I added, defiant. "I mean accident!"

"Then why else were we summoned to go to the principal's office?" he hissed back.

"I dunno? Maybe he wants to play dress ups?" I suggested sarcastically. Squalo rolled his eyes and knocked on the door.

"Come in!" a muffled voice called. Squalo opened the door, and eyed me to get in first.

"Please, have a seat. I have some unfortunate news to inform you..."

* * *

><p><em>Several hours later...<em>

I stared outside the window, waiting. Waiting for someone to suddenly jump in and say something like 'ha ha! I'm totally kidding – can't you take a joke?' But no one came.

*flashback*

"_Well...their bodies were found on a train going to Spain two hours ago..." our principal tried to say gently. "I assure you, the Vongola family is doing everything they can to find the culprit. Evidence suggests the culprit's identity is your former principal..."_

"_VOI,__ HIM__? Didn't he die five years ago?" Squalo retorted, dumbfounded._

"_He was taken into custody by your parent's hands. He broke out of prison four days ago, and is currently on the run..." our superior hypothesized. "It seems he has a grudge to settle with the two of you. Do not wander too far from the school."_

"_You... have no problem with us staying here?" Squalo questioned._

"_The school's defences are impeccable. But your school fees, on the other hand, should be your top priority."_

"_Our parents left us their money, right?" Squalo bargained."There's more than enough money there for our tuition."_

"_I've checked you parent's will. N__either of you are eligible inherit anything until 'Superbi reaches the age of eighteen'," our principal dictated._

"_VOI! That can't be possible!" Squalo growled. "Aren't children meant to receive an inheritance after their parent's deaths?"_

"_That would be true, if you had a foster parent or other living family."_

"_WHAT! Can't we just take responsibility of ourselves? And why would our parents even put that in their will?" Squalo debated._

"_Well...it's a quite common decision among Mafioso. Many are afraid their children will assassinate them for their inheritance. Now, about the matter of custody – "_

"_I can take care of myself!" Squalo interrupted._

"_Though there are several legal difficulties, I'm sure we can keep this a secret. What of your sister?"_

"_I'll look after her!"_

"_You're certain? Take my advice – this could affect your future possibilities of - "_

"_I don't care! She's my sister; I'm not letting her go!" Squalo hollered._

_The principal pursed his lips in thought. _"_It's a shame. In that case, fill out this form." He slid over a formal document. "This make you her legal guardian."_

_Squalo snatched the piece of paper, and read through it hurriedly, and signed it. _

*end of flashback*

I'd spend the last six hours mulling over things; and three things were certain.

1. We'd never exactly been close with our parents. Sure they cared for us, and we cared for them; but it never felt like a real family.

2. Squalo was the most awesome brother EVER.

3. We were broke.

Squalo opened my door, walked in and sat down beside me. "You okay?"

I didn't reply.

"Look, I know it's tough, but - "

"Did you really mean that? Are you really going to take care of me?" I whispered.

"VOI! Does it look like I'd tell a lie?!" Squalo said forcefully. "You're my only sister, Serena. I'm not letting you go. That's a promise."

I don't remember the rest of that day. The only thing I recall was Squalo's arms around me as I cried.

* * *

><p>I took about three days for me to get a grip on myself and get back to class. Squalo's self rehabilitation was to simple spar with someone or hack up a few dummies. On the other hand, I preferred to simply stay still and think about things like committing suicide.<p>

"What's wrong with you?" my instructor yelled. I didn't reply. But the answer was simple. I had no will to fight. "Look, get off your ass and stop acting like a spoilt kid!"

My eye twitched. Spoilt kid? I was still a kid. Why did I have to act like anything else? In the midst of my thoughts, I snapped and knocked out the instructor's teeth. ."...I swear, that was an accident." The sarcastic voice didn't help the explanation.

* * *

><p><em>A couple days later...<em>

Squalo started taking hits with the school's 'assassination program'. It was apparently a good business, because a week later, he'd managed to come up with both our tuition fees. What's more, he actually seemed to _enjoy_ killing people.

However, I felt guilty that I wasn't doing anything to help him. So I decided to take a hit too.

"Serena! Pay attention – we don't need any incidents this time yeah?" Mr. Mayo ordered.

"Yes Sir..." I muttered from my corner, staring dully at the bomb in front of me. I didn't like bombs. But they were a compulsory part of the science curriculum, so I just had to 'grin and bear it'.

"Now, the bombs we have in front of us are timed bombs – when the clock attached hits twelve, you'd better hope you're not within twenty feet of this thing. Take these babies home, figure out how they work, and try to bring it back in one piece. Extra credit goes to those who manage to disarm their bomb! I'll be watching the news for any explosions..." the guy grinned crazily.

In my opinion, he was a cool teacher, but belonged in a mental hospital – in one of those rooms with padded walls.

I'd heard about the school's assassination program from Squalo. It was a 'first in first serve' thing - there was a list to choose from, and no one could stop your decisions. The school provided all the necessary intel. That just left the actual killing bit.

"Did you hear about Greg? Apparently he didn't make it..."

I looked up from the list on names to see a group of seniors stroll into the cafeteria.

"What?" they continued. "There's no way that's possible – have you seen the guy fight? He's invincible."

"Who was the hit?"

"Hell's snake or something...you know the elementary principal that got sacked or something?"

Suddenly, my full attention was directed to their conversation.

"Well anyways, today's the last day the school's keeping the hit open. It goes to Vendicare after today."

"How much's it worth?"

"Eighty thousand – dead." I heard someone give out a low whistle.

"Oh well...poor Greg. I heard he just got a date with his girlfriend too,"

"Really? Was she hot?"

The boy's conversation drifted into more 'mature' themes, my eyes focused on name – the man that murdered my parents. I would've very much liked to kick him somewhere in his 'southerly regions'. You know?

This bastard was going down.

* * *

><p><em>Last seen buying train ticket for the 7:30pm train for Switzerland. Train leaves from platform 18, Trapani station.<em>

I stared. If I was going to kill this guy, this would be my best chance... Trapani station was close, but it'd still take a while to get there.

There wasn't time to get any weapons; I'd have to make use of what I had on me. A bomb.

It took about three hours to reach the train station – I made it with about ten minutes to spare. To the general public, I must've looked like a dead chicken. I only had a vague idea on what the guy really looked like, what he was like or his capabilities, but I decided to follow the information given; _Platform 18, 7:30pm train to Switzerland._

I didn't actually have a ticket, but I managed to sneak past the gates pretending to be part of some family with a bunch of kids.

The train itself was an old fashioned thing – large windows, small doors. I had no idea what I was up against, so I switched on the bomb to three minutes and shoved it in my bag. I didn't really care if it got blown up - I never liked it anyway; it was bright pink. If things didn't go to plan, I could always disarm it... Last count, I was meant to cut the blue wire. Or it red? Scratch that, if I couldn't disarm it, it was going out the window.

"Doors closing; please stand clear", an automated voice rang out. I rushed into the compartment and went for a corner seat - only to realise that there was only one other person.

"I've been waiting for you," a man grumbled. "I don't suppose you'll know me, but I have to say, you've caused me a great deal of annoyance."

"And I suppose you're the bastard who murdered my parents?" I mused back, hoping that the intel I received was real.

"They got what they deserved," he snapped.

"Do they? You were the one who sabotaged my stupid exam!"

"I spent five years in prison left to rot!" he yelled angrily. "Can you give me my life back?"

"Can you give my parents back?" I retorted. _Two minutes left..._

"Then that makes us even. Are you here to kill me?" he asked childishly.

"Maybe, maybe not."

"Indecisive eh? Not going to make a difference. I'm going to enjoy killing you." He drew a gun, and lunged forward.

"You sure about that?" I laughed, ducking behind a chair. My worked on autopilot, and I desperately tried to find an exit. If this bomb was going to go off, it'd be a pretty stupid death to be caught in the blast. I had only just realised that the windows didn't open. _One minute left..._

"Shit!" I muttered as another bullet just missed my head and hit the window behind me. My shoelace was stuck in the damn seat... I yanked my foot out and lost my balance, just as the guy swung another punch, missed, and hit the cracked window instead. _Exit...exit...exit..._! There was a massive hole in the window now – probably big enough for me to fit through.

We exchanged a few more blows before he spoke. "I must say, it's impressive that haven't died yet, I'll give you credit for that. But I won't be defeated by a mere child!" he laughed hysterically, and managed to get me in a chokehold.

"Sure about that?" I spluttered, using a back kick between his legs. I smiled as he keeled over.

"You bitch!" he swore, getting back up. "Now you fucking die!"

"I'm too young to die!" _Ten seconds to go..._

"You're never too young to die."

"Then here's a parting gift!" I yelled, throwing my backpack at his face, covered my head with my arms and aimed for the hole in the window.

As my feet left the floor, I could feel the heat on my back as I crashed through the window, wincing as fragments of glass cut through my skin. I rolled a few times before coming to a stop – I admit, it was an extremely rough landing. I let out a breath of relief. I was alive.

My body was a wreck though - my school uniform was in tatters. I could barely feel my legs, and I was bleeding all over. The explosion wasn't strong enough to throw the train off the rails, thank God. But one thing was certain.

That guy was dead for sure.

It had begun to rain. I lay beside the train tracks for a while, exhausted. I killed someone. I was responsible for the death of a human being. That asshole was one of the 'bad guys', I knew that much. He deserved to die. By killing him, I was doing a favor to the world.

So why did it feel so wrong?

Getting back to the school was my number one priority. Thankfully, I wasn't too far from the school; ten miles or so? It was pitch black, and I got lost a few times, but I followed my gut. By the time I limped back to school, the doors were locked. So I climbed the wall and knocked on the boys' window. _Oh look, Dino's back._

Their expressions were priceless.

* * *

><p>The following morning, I felt like I was dead. Dino and Squalo were both groggy from my visit. It was my fault they were up all night; and it was also my fault the three of us would have mess duty in the morning.<p>

"You know, I'm just a little curious, what exactly were you doing last night?" Squalo muttered, helping me put on a long sleeved blouse. I winced as I answered.

"Train trip."

"No – don't tell me. You were in that explosion last night!" Dino exclaimed, toothbrush in his mouth. "It was all over the news..."

"Why the hell were you on a train? There's kind of like – this crazy hitman pro who's trying to kill us on the loose right now?" he ranted.

"About that..." I started. How was I going to put this? "I may've...might've...most likely...possibly...by some chance...killed him."

"HUH?"

By breakfast, they learnt the whole story.

"I knew you had it in you!" Squalo exclaimed proudly. "Your first kill – how did it feel?"

"Surprisingly horrible..." I sighed, chewing my toast thoughtfully. Dino and Squalo shared a confused look, and in that moment, I felt very much alone._  
><em>

* * *

><p><strong>Yay, the Varia arrives in the next chapter :D<strong>

**Have a nice day, ciao! :]**


	9. Fuck off Varia!

Chapter 9 - Fuck Off Varia!

The rest of that day was a disaster. Sadly, I had science class up first.

"Remind me, who stole your bomb?" My Mayo tried to ask casually.

"I was on a train...and there was kinda like this guy...and...uh...I couldn't get it back...from the guy...coz it...blew up," I muttered awkwardly in reply.

"So I'm guessing you're responsible for the train explosion last night?" he continued. Now this was just getting slightly...pathetic. He knew I was responsible. I knew I was responsible. So what was the point of this charade?

I pretended to look offended. "Of course not! How can you say such a thing?"

And so, by the end of the day, several rumours had sparked up.

"I heard she barely survived. I mean look at her – she's all beat up..." a random person whispered.

"I heard she's a cold blooded killer!" another rebutted.

"I heard she got hit by the train!"

"I heard she got a month's detention!"

I sighed. Only the last line was partially true – I was going to help the cooks for a few hours everyday until 'you successfully have a home economics lesson that does not end in self-injury', and God knows how long that would take. Evil teachers...they always knew exactly how to torture students.

Lesson to learn: School projects are not meant to be used for recreational purposes.

* * *

><p>That afternoon, I got a present from Squalo.<p>

"Now, check this out..." Squalo proclaimed, pulling out a piece of metal about twenty centimetres long with a curved handle on the end.

"An umbrella handle?" I muttered, confused.

"Nah, it's too thin for an umbrella handle," Dino pointed out.

"True; but you gotta admit, the shape is pretty similar..."

"Yeah, but logically speaking if you shoved that onto a - "

"VOI! Why the hell do you think it's an umbrella handle? Why would I _make_ an umbrella handle? Why would I _give_ you an umbrella handle?"

"So...it's for me?" I perked up brightly. Oh wait. It was an umbrella handle.

"What is it really?" Dino finally asked, the question Squalo was waiting for.

"Check. This. Out. You hold it and swing it outwards. It extends into – "

A walking stick. Big difference.

"There's a small button there – press it in, and it minimizes. It's a mixture of titanium and steel, so it's tough. It doesn't make a bad weapon either...limping is bad for your bones right?" Squalo shrugged.

At least someone was looking out for me.

* * *

><p>The next few days passed relatively ordinarily. I ate. I slept. I worked in the kitchens. The painful days of recuperation... People say they're meant to be nice and peaceful, but fate was one thing that never was on my side; and Dino never hesitated to remind me.<p>

Throughout my unfortunate series of events, the turning point began on a Thursday night.

It'd been bad day; I'd been washing every single dish used that night by hand (can you believe these people have never heard of a dishwasher?!) until midnight, so when I finally got to the boys room, I slipped off my contacts and practically collapsed on their couch (I may've forgotten my keys). My eyes were almost closed when I heard something smash through the window.

"VOI! What was that?" Squalo muttered, sitting upright, sword in hand.

"Huh what? Serena? Are you coming through the window again?" Dino yawned, rubbing his eyes.

"No, I'm on the couch..." I whispered back.

"Oh? You're back? I was starting to get worried..." Squalo sighed.

"Yeah right; you were snoring the second they called lights out," Dino smirked.

"Geez Squalo, nice to know you lie about being concerned for my safety."

"VOI! It's the thought that counts Serena!"

"Sure, whatever you say..."

"Must you sound so sarcastic?"

"Maybe I'm being sarcastic on purpose."

"So what broke the window?" Dino asked, putting us back on track. Our eyes darted towards a... All right. I had no idea what it was. A black blob? No...it looked more like a pixelated black blob...

"Smoke bomb!" Squalo hissed.

He was right. Seconds later, the 'bomb' erupted in a flash of white smoke, and we all went completely blind.

"SQUALO! DINO!" I yelled at the top of my lungs.

"You don't have to yell, we're right next to you!" Dino's voice whined back. "Honestly, you're almost as bad as Squalo..."

"VOI! I'm standing right here!" his voice snapped back.

"Where? It sounds like you're standing outside the window...are you going to suicide or something?" I suddenly panicked.

"Hell no! Give me a sec...I'll come towards you..." he muttered.

A few seconds later, something heavy crashed on top of me. "Squalo?" I questioned.

"Yeah?" he groaned, sitting up.

"Please get your ass off my face."

"Sorry, sorry..." Squalo muttered, getting to his feet and dusting himself off. "Come here Dino, can you get to us?"

A few seconds passed.

"Dino?" I inquired.

But we only heard a muffled scream.

"Dino!" we panicked in unison.

"You stay here; I'll go get him..." Squalo reassured trying to stifle a yawn (which really wasn't very reassuring), drew his sword and ran into the smoke.

So I waited. But nothing came. After half a minute, I sat down and started twiddling my thumbs. Was I going to help him? No. He'd get offended that I didn't have any faith in him. But was I worried? Just a little. I was about to stand up when I heard a voice.

"All right, seems like everyone in here's asleep too. About time."

"Haven't you ever heard of a private room?" I quipped up on instinct. "Who the hell are you?" The figure began walking away from me. "OI! Don't just break in here and ignore me!"

"Oh, hello, what are you - " the guy murmured, walking into my line of vision.

The guy never got the chance to finish his sentence. I whipped open my walking stick and swung it like a bat into his head. _Huh...a walking stick actually makes a pretty sweet weapon..._

"Die, you motherfucker." I raised the walking stick for another hit.

"Wait..." the guy pleaded.

"Oh I'm sorry, what did you say?" I acknowledged sarcastically. "Didn't quite catch that."

"Look – I'm Mr. Mayo. Your science teacher! Please don't kill me..." he said panicked.

"You're lying! Only the lowest of the low would go to take advantage of those with shit eyesight!" I hollered angrily.

"I swear to God I'm your teacher!" he insisted, pulling off his face. No wait; that was a gas mask...

"I'm not religious!"

"It's a figure of speech Serena! Honestly, didn't we have this discussion a few days ago?"

I froze. The guy had a point... "All right. Then I'll ask you something that only you would know. What'd I get wrong in my last science test?" I accused.

"You got zero because you forgot to write your name and spelt organism as orgasm!"

"And how the hell is that fair?" I sighed, lowering the walking stick, but suddenly thought better of it. "What the hell are you doing here? Are you a pervert or something?"

"Hell no! I'm like; asexual okay? It's just the annual school surprise. Didn't you get the message?"

"WHAT MESSAGE?"

* * *

><p>Mafia High. The place full of surprises. The place that will write a message about crazy surprise attacks and then forget to actually send the message.<p>

The following day, things started to look brighter, but it was just the key to what I would call a lifelong death sentence.

"The actual idea was to see which room was the most coordinated while drugged; seeing as you were the only one conscious, you win," the head of science declared awkwardly. "Congratulations – the prize this year is two tickets to Mafia Land and a gift."

"What's this gift thing?"

"Anything you want, granted to you by the Vongola family. Previous winners have become astronauts, billionaires, celebrities; you name it."

"Can I get another ticket to Mafia Land?"

"No."

Huh. What a lousy gift card.

* * *

><p>That night, I discussed with Dino and Squalo.<p>

"I'm still surprised you didn't fall asleep - I mean half a minute and we were both out," Squalo shrugged.

"Maybe it was because I was already tired? Anyways, what are we going to do with these?" I grinned, throwing two tickets onto the coffee table.

"Sweet dude! I've never been to Mafia Land! It's one of the only places that my Dad'll probably let me go," Dino said wistfully.

"Shit, that's fucking awesome; there's bound to be a few decent swordsmen lying around!" Squalo theorised.

"You're forgetting that there are only two tickets, but three of us," I pointed out to their dismay.

Dino quickly changed his attitude. "Well then, it's clear who's going. You two should go; I mean, you guys haven't done anything together lately right? You gotta embrace your sibling love!"

I made a face. "Sibling love?"

"We can't just leave you on your own Dino - it's not fair..." Squalo growled. "Why don't you go with Serena? You deserve a break after all that shit you went through."

"It's only fair if Serena chooses, Squalo," Dino insisted.

"I know...so what do you say Serena? Either you go with me, or you go Dino - "

"Why don't the two of you go together? You spend so much time worrying about me, but you guys work three times as hard babysitting me..." I brainstormed.

"You...sure about this?" Squalo muttered.

"Totally! I don't even like Mafia Land that much – I hate most of the rides in the brochure..." I lied. I actually thought the brochure was pretty persuasive; the beaches, the food, the hotel...it was like living in paradise.

"But you earned this Serena...you deserve to go to mafia land," Dino pointed out.

"Those tickets shouldn't go to waste. I'll be fine. I still have a gift of choice. You guys go. I insist."

"..."

"YOU ARE THE NICEST PERSON IN THE WORLD!"

* * *

><p>And so they left.<p>

Three days, three nights, all to myself. And I got my gift too. The head of staff was baffled; of all the things I asked for, I asked for a piano. But I thought it was the right thing to do; it cured my boredom.

So on the morning Squalo and Dino were gone, I made the decision to buy some sheet music on the following day. I'd only laid for a few minutes before I was woken up again.

_Ring ring...ring ring..._

"Ohayo?" I muttered, picking up the room phone. Who the hell called at one in the morning?

"VOI! Be quiet!" Squalo's voice echoed around the room. I was holding the phone at least five inches from my ear, and I still felt half deaf.

"Am I too loud?"

"Sorry Serena, that was Dino. Honestly, he's under the impression that you've accidentally killed yourself; we've just checked into the hotel. This place AWESOME. We're gonna go visit the rides now, so you sure you'll be fine?"

"Sure, why not? I mean, what's the worst that could happen?" I shrugged.

"Please don't say that...we both know you'll jinx yourself again..." Squalo sighed knowingly.

"Have fun..." I tried to say while yawning.

"Oh! I forgot – it's like midnight in Italy right? Go to sleep. We'll be back soon."

"G'night Squalo..." I muttered as I hung up. Come to think of it, life was actually pretty nice without the guys there – more room to myself, peace and quiet; but just a little boring and lonely.

* * *

><p><em>In the Varia HQ...<em>

"All right Levi; how is recruitment going?" Tyr growled. He always growled. As the leader of the Vongola Assassination Squad, that sort of attitude was expected.

"We've picked up the trail of a new guy; Superbi Squalo. Swordsman, student of Mafia high -" Levi began.

"He only popped up on radar two or three weeks ago – but in that short amount of time, he's already killed twenty four people – word is that he really does have Varia quality," Mammon droned.

"Is he at Mafia High right now?" Lussuria chipped in.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...he arrived in Mafia Land last night with an acquaintance; so this could a great opportunity to scout him..." Bel giggled. It'd only been four days since he'd joined (the only person who joined the Varia by choice; go figure) and he was already recognized as an officer.

"Is he really worth it? I mean, hey; kill a bunch of people and 'BAM!' you're in the Varia..." Levi complained.

"Shut up Levi. He could still make us some money," Mammon insisted.

Tyr glanced quickly at the file that had been placed in front of him. Fourteen. It was a bit young. But if an eight year old like Bel could join the Varia as an officer, why not this kid? Superbi Squalo... Dead parents. Tyr glared at the picture of a white haired boy grinning with what appeared to be his sister. The girl interested him.

"Superbi Squalo... Levi, Mammon, I expect your return in three days. Try not to kill him." Tyr ordered.

"Yes Boss."

* * *

><p><em>Mafia High...<em>

I tried to get up early the following morning; key word being 'tried'. Turned out it was actually midday. God damn it...Squalo and Dino really were great alarm clocks...

I sneezed. Was someone talking about me?

* * *

><p><em>Meanwhile in mafia land...<em>

"Squalo? Its late...aren't you gonna go to sleep?" Dino suggested.

"Jet lag... I'll go get Serena some souvenirs. Sleep well yeah?" Squalo muttered as he grabbed a backpack. "I'll call if something goes wrong."

The second Squalo stepped outside the hotel, he knew something was wrong. He could sense a dark aura...but he shook it off. This island was controlled by the Vongola family. Nothing should be able to go wrong. He walked a few blocks before turning into an open air market. Bright colours, street vendors; quality goods. Squalo when his instinct kicked in.

It was as if they were in a movie; the second Levi and Mammon stepped into the market (though technically Mammon floated), everyone scattered. Even the vendors ran away.

"VOI! Where are you going?!" Squalo protested loudly. "How the fuck am I meant to buy anything?!"

"Hey you. We have a job offer for you," Levi started.

"I refuse," Squalo growled without looking at them. He could already tell there were two people - one tall guy and one baby. "So, who's messing with my holiday?"

"The Varia," Levi paused, waiting for a gasp of surprise or a 'please don't kill me!'.

"Tch. Leave me alone you assholes. I have shopping to do," Squalo muttered and ignored them. He took a nice bracelet and left the right amount on the counter.

"We're here to offer you a job. We believe that you could benefit greatly from joining the – " Mammon tried.

"Join the Varia? That's the most ridiculous thing I've heard all day. I have a _life_."

"Refusing so soon? If you're smart, you won't let us resort to force..." Mammon warned.

Smirk. "A real fight? Now this is what I've been waiting for!" Squalo exclaimed, drawing his sword.

They say when they looked back at the video recording of one of the camera's that just happened to be there, Levi and Mammon never stood a chance.

"Have you wondered about your friend? Blondie's probably going to have nightmare for years!" Mammon panicked, showing an illusion of Dino being dragged out of bed.

"VOI! What do you take me for? I know for fact that the Varia doesn't like involving unrelated people – you guys wouldn't make a single cent. Dino's the heir to the Cavallone family, you'd be responsible for provoking a war between the Vongola and the Cavallone. I'd rather doubt it."

Mammon frowned. This guy was good. _Superbi Squalo...Superbi Squalo..._why did the name remind him of something? Then it hit him. Serena di Squalo. The girl he met at that park all those years ago...could it be the girl who was responsible for the train accident – the girl in the photo? He decided to give it a shot.

"Well, you have quite an eye. That bracelet? It's pure white gold; something a girl would enjoy very much. I wonder who it could for? A girlfriend? Or perhaps a sister?"

Squalo tried not to react, but his eyes narrowed.

"Hit a soft spot eh?" Levi bullied. "It's true we don't like making unrelated people involved, but making a related person involved...I see no problem in that."

"Don't you dare - "

"Dare what? Hurt her? I promise you, we can do a lot worse than that..." Mammon smirked darkly as mist began to come out of nowhere.

"VOI! I'll kill you!" Squalo threatened.

But it was too late. Mammon simply lifted a finger and they both disappeared with the mist. Immediately, Squalo called Dino.

* * *

><p><em>Back in Varia HQ...<em>

"I'm sorry boss...we failed," Mammon explained in a monotone. He didn't like video chat; he'd much preferred making a phone call. After all, he didn't exactly want to see their ugly faces.

"You fools! Where is the boy's current whereabouts?" Tyr was angry again. Mammon sighed as he smashed another chair. Honestly; repairs...

"He's coming back to Italy, but I think we may need a little...something to convince him."

"What are you suggesting Mammon?" Bel frowned. This was against Varia protocol.

"The girl in the file – she's Serena di Squalo; a student of Mafia High. She's his sister," Mammon explained.

"High school? She can't be older than Bel - and that name...wasn't that the person who caused the train explosion or something?" Lussuria recalled.

"She's seven, and yes; that's the guy. I believe if we have control over her, the boy will compromise immediately."

"Is Levi there?"

"Yes, he's beside me."

Secret revealed, Levi walked into the camera's line of view and was about to start apologizing when Tyr cut him off.

"Levi. It's your responsibility to get her here to the Varia HQ. Unharmed." The final word was spoken as a challenge.

"I'll take care of it immediately boss."

* * *

><p><em>Back in mafia land...<em>

Squalo burst through the door of their hotel room. "Has she picked up yet?"

"No...but its Sunday. She could be wondering around the school or maybe she went out to a town or something..." Dino shrugged.

"It's too much of a coincidence! Dino; we're going back!"

Dino was internally shocked. He'd never seen Squalo like this. "Are you sure?"

"VOI! THAT DOESN'T MATTER. WE HAVE TO GO BACK NOW!" Squalo bellowed, shaking Dino by his shoulders.

"Squalo – chill! I don't exactly know what's going on, but you know Serena. She's...Serena. She'll be fine." Dino smiled reassuringly.

Squalo sat down heavily on the couch and buried his face in his hands, letting out a heavy sigh. "I know. I'm sorry. Up against the Varia...I'm not so sure."

"She's up against the Varia?" Dino fretted. "Why the hell does the Vongola _assassination_ squad want her? She's just a kid!"

"It's me."

Dino stared, and stood up abruptly. "I'll organise a flight."

* * *

><p><em>In a random restaurant...<em>

I frowned. I hadn't been able to find a music shop, but I did find a nice restaurant. It was completely isolated, so I wondered if the people around me were in some way mafia related. I was in fact sitting at the bar drinking (all right, they wouldn't let me have any wine so I was drinking fizzy grape juice) when I heard the song.

There was a pianist in the corner; the song...why did it sound so familiar? It gave of such a menacing tone, and it reminded me of someone...but I couldn't quite my finger on who.

When the pianist finished, stood up and was about to leave, I confronted him.

"Ciao!" I chatted casually. "I was just wondering what song you were playing. You're a great pianist by the way!"

"Uh...thanks. I was playing - " the guy suddenly stopped. He shoved the sheet music in my hands and left.

"Hey! Do you want me to pay you back for this?" I offered after him. But he was long gone. It was only then that I realised that there was no one left in the entire restaurant. I rubbed my eyes and stared. Did something happen?

Pain.

I didn't even realise that there was someone behind me. Nor did I realise that someone had just stabbed me in the neck with a syringe. A syringe...that meant there was probably an arm attached too...

On instinct, I swung the guy around and smashed him into a table lit with candles. The couple who were dining at the table had been drinking vodka – and to my delight, the guy erupted in flames. I carefully removed the needle, sighing with relief when I realised the idiot missed the major arteries in my neck. About half of the liquid was probably being pumped around my system right now...I shivered. I didn't really care about the mysterious liquid, but I hoped the needle had been clean.

"All right kid, we need you to come with us."

I swivelled around, guard up. Three guys in total, but two if you didn't count the guy on fire. "Who are you people? What the fuck do you want with me?"

"We are the Varia Lightning Strike Force. We – "

"Aha ha ha! Who the hell though of such a ridiculous name?" I burst into laughter, doubling over.

"We order you to come with us!"

"Fuck no! Why would I take orders from a stranger? I've learnt about stranger danger. Now if you don't mind, I'm leaving."

"You cannot leave!" they insisted in unison (which was actually kind of freaky), and drew some sort of an umbrella. "This is your last chance to come quietly!"

"Such a shame..." I sighed drawing my walking stick. I felt like this was some novelty battle. "Bring it on motherfucker."

They struck first, but I managed to block them. Big mistake. Apparently the weapons of the Varia Lightning Strike Force had electric charges, and here's my theory:

Metal walking stick + electrical pole = pain

I crumpled. I knew this feeling...this was almost the same feeling as when Squalo and I created...what was it called again? Attacco di Squalo...that was the name.

"She's a goner. I'll get her legs, you get her arms."

"Over my dead body..." I groaned, forcing myself to my feet. I figured I looked drunk, but I wasn't going to give in easily.

"Geez...face it - we're Varia; you're a little girl," one of the guys muttered. "If you give in now, we'll be gentle."

"I admit; that is a rather interesting weapon. But one demonstration was all I needed. I happen to enjoy combat without weapons more than with..." I stated, ignoring their compromise.

They charged. I leaned back, swerved and punched one in the stomach, and kicked the other between the legs. Hard. They crumpled simultaneously.

"Take that you fucking ass shithole!" I taunted, flipping them off.

I grabbed my walking stick and staggered back to my school. The drug was taking some effect. I barely made it to the boys room before I passed out.

* * *

><p><em>Mafia Land Airport...<em>

"Come on Squalo – the plane's gonna leave in a few minutes!" Dino complained, trying to drag him through the door.

"Why isn't she picking up? Even if she fell asleep, she should pick up. The only reason she wouldn't..." Squalo trailed off, cutting off his vivid imagination.

"There's nothing we can do Squalo; let's just make our priority getting back to Italy," Dino convinced. "Get some sleep, please. I'm begging you, dude."

"I can't sleep!"

"I'm worried too - but what's the point if you're just going to fall asleep when you confront the Varia?"

...Fair point.

Dino was asleep almost immediately. Squalo had already come to a conclusion...being his friend wasn't a good thing. If they got too close - well...people could've targeted him because of Squalo. His sister was a relation that he couldn't cut off...but Dino?

No. Not yet. But the time would come where their friendship would have to end.

* * *

><p><em>Varia HQ...<em>

"Levi, you not only failed me once, but twice?" Tyr demanded into the phone.

"Forgive me Boss..." Levi apologized over and over.

"Your lightning squad wasn't even able to take out one little girl? Honestly! Aren't you people meant to be hardcore killers?" Tyr hung up on Levi and summoned Bel to his room.

"Belphegor. You're seven, right?"

Bel's face twitched. "The Prince is eight."

"Whatever. The girl would probably be able to relate to someone about her own age. Bring her in alive; I don't mind if you beat her up a bit. Got that?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...yes Boss..."

* * *

><p><em>Mafia High...<em>

When I woke up, my body felt like it'd been hit by a car. Oddly enough, I didn't remember anything of the previous day. It was Monday right? Groaning, I fixed my contacts. Since when did I leave them in when I slept? Running my fingers through my hair, I stared at the clock in our room. 9:00am. Holy shit – I missed the first class.

"Serena! You're late!"

"Yes Sir?"

"I'm your drama teacher; I'm a lady not a sir!" my teacher snapped for the umpteenth time. "Show some respect!"

"Sorry ma'am. Won't happen again," I lied yet again. Well, I was trying, I really was.

"Just focus!"

"Of course ma'am."

"Stop using ma'am in every sentence!"

"I'm sorry...Sir?"

Facepalm.

But finally, the lesson ended without any more disturbance, and I shuffled onto the next class.

Food technology. They were two words that the devil had probably put together himself. But I was pleased to say I was going well. No really; I was baking cupcakes, and for once, I hadn't burnt it, forgotten to add baking powder, used salt instead of sugar, cut myself while playing the knife game, actually remembered to wear oven mitts and to my teachers surprise, set nothing on fire.

It was in fact an almost perfect lesson. I'd never expected to be relieved of my punishment so soon. But alas it was not meant to be. Twenty minutes before the bell, we were meant to have our dishes judged. Previously, I'd always come last, but today – I actually made something presentable.

That was the moment I met that fucking asshole of a Prince.

_Knock knock knock..._

"Come in!"

The boy that entered was creepy. All right, I admit, he was pretty hot. Blond, bangs that covered his eyes, a tiara and a gothic looking uniform. It was clear that he was pretty young (my age maybe?); though he was a lot taller than me.

"Oh my god...he's so cute!" the girls squealed.

"Do you think he's rich?"

"That's such a cool tiara!"

"Why hello young man. It's always a pleasure to have someone from the Varia visit our school..." my teacher bowed respectfully. What was this? Japan?

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...what do we have here?" Bel mused, looking around at the girls in the class. He hadn't exactly had a chance to look at a photo the girl he was meant to be find; so he planned to play along. Apparently the girl he was looking for was meant to have an attitude...

"Well, we were going to have a taste test. Would you like to have the honors?" my teacher continued.

The damn hag...now that she mentioned it, I did start to remember. It was the Varia that attacked me at that restaurant. And now they were back. I didn't quite know what to do. Run? Fight? Well, maybe they weren't after _me_. They could've just been targeting random girls who _looked _like me.

"Serena!"

"Yes Ma'am?" I grumbled grouchily.

"Don't talk to me with that tone! Go fetch our guest some tea."

"Of course." In the past few months, I'd become the teachers 'errand girl'. Troubled with thoughts, I didn't argue, for once.

I heavily placed a saucer and teacup in front of the boy that had decided to take my seat.

"Serena! With more grace!"

So I picked up the saucer again, and threw it down on the table. It shattered. I ignored the teacher's threats and glared at the boy. Well...it was a little hard considering I couldn't exactly see his eyes, but I figured he was staring at me too.

"So your name is Serena di Squalo?" he questioned with a creepy smile.

"And what's yours? The fake Prince?" I retorted. His smile disappeared.

"I am Belphegor. But I am better known as Prince the Ripper," he bragged, three interestingly shaped knives instantly in his hand. He was sure. This had to be the girl...

"What business do you have here?" I hissed back at him.

"I'm here to eat cake like a prince. What other business should I have?" He mused, knives disappearing as quickly as they had appeared.

Coming to a decision, I turned to the teacher. "Excuse me, may I go to the bathroom?" I tried to ask with an innocent face.

"The bell's going to ring soon."

"May I go to my locker?"

"Why do you need to go to your locker?"

"Then...can I go the medical wing?"

"What for? You haven't got any injuries."

By now, the majority of the class had realised that I was just trying to get out of there. But none of them knew how badly I wanted to go a secluded place and scream my lungs out. I picked up a knife lying on the side bench, gritted my teeth, and ran it along my palm. Blood dripped onto the floor.

"What are you doing Serena?! Someone get the first aid kit!"

"Can't I just go to the medical wing?" I suggested, stating the obvious.

"Sit down and stay calm!" my teacher demanded, forcing me down into the chair next to the boy.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~... You know, if you wanted an injury, you could've always asked..." he commented.

"Shut up you phony."

That seemed to set the guy off. "I'm a real Prince."

"Yeah right. It's not like there are many countries with a monarchy today. So what are you the Prince of? Your imaginary castle?" I laughed. Maybe I shouldn't have said that. It was a bit mean. But nonetheless, he took out a knife and tried to slash at me. I fell off the chair.

"Woah! Chill man. No harm intended."

He didn't believe me. I don't blame him though. It was completely intentional.

We both stood up at the same time and pulled out our weapons. I felt ridiculous for taking a walking stick against a killing pro, but I silently thanked Squalo (who was supposedly enjoying himself at a damn island resort).

"Now, I suppose you're not going to come with me without a fight, so let's play," he grinned darkly.

"Ooh, what game?" I murmured sarcastically.

"Death~."

* * *

><p><em>Outside Mafia High<em>

"That'd be - "

"Keep the change!" Dino insisted, running after Squalo.

The cab driver glanced at the building. This must've been a posh rich kid school...but in the middle of no where? It could've belonged to the mafia though...

With that thought, the man quickly drove away and vowed never to return.

* * *

><p><em>Seventh Floor<em>

The Prince guy threw a handful of knives, and I deflected them. The girls screamed and ran in circles. He threw some more. I dodged them; I was sure of that. So why was there a cut on my thigh? He jumped on the table, preparing for a kick or something.

I frowned. He was _stepping _on _my __cupcakes_. Was this guy trying to pick a fight? I could've made it through one god damn lesson without an injury if it hadn't been for him...! Previously, he'd been on the offensive strike, but now I jumped up and tackled him, and we both lost balance and crashed out of the window.

_Ah, such a boring death... _But the guy threw a knife through the fifth story window and swung us through the fourth storey window. Wires. _So that's what it was..._

* * *

><p><em>The super long staircase...<em>

"I don't understand – why are we going to the seventh floor?" Dino huffed as they moved into the ninth flight of stairs.

"If Serena's fine, then she should be in food tech right? I memorized her timetable, and her classroom's on the seventh floor!" Squalo theorized.

CRASH!

"Did you hear that Squalo?" Dino stopped, looking out of the window on the twelfth flight.

"Sounded like...glass breaking," Squalo considered.

"Fuck you Varia!" they heard a voice yell and stared.

"Was that just - "

"SERENA!"

* * *

><p><em>Fourth floor...<em>

I rubbed my head. The damn prince had been sure that I was the landing cushion. I then realised that he was still lying on me. With a sudden burst of adrenaline, I kicked him, aiming for a furnace.

He _just_ missed.

Wait. A furnace? We were in a metal workshop. So we both used unfinished projects and tried to kill each other. Once again, students just stood there and stared.

Geez. Staring is rude.

* * *

><p>Squalo was lost. All right; he knew where he was, but not where to go. Where did Serena fall? He knew she crashed back into the building...<p>

"Oi Squalo! Isn't that your sister?" a guy he knew asked, popping his head out of the metal shop room. "Do something man! They're out of control!"

"They?"

* * *

><p>My attention span never was very large. The second I heard Squalo call my name, I dropped a drill that I happened to be holding and put all my focus into Squalo. "I thought you were coming back tomorrow? How was Mafia Land? Did you get me souvenirs?" I babbled, happy to see him, completely ignoring the prince guy.<p>

Bel had been holding a nun chuck and struck out at me. I couldn't really tell what Squalo was trying to say, fingers pointed at me. Or was it behind me? Did he want us to take a photograph together?

I didn't even feel myself hit the floor.

* * *

><p>Bel scooped up the girl and threw her over his shoulder.<p>

"Let her go!" Squalo bellowed, drawing out his sword.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~... My orders don't involve you; but if you ever want to see her again, I advise you put down the sword," Bel threatened, pulling out a knife and traced her neck.

"What do you want?" Squalo growled.

"Right now? Your co-operation," Bel suggested. "I suggest you consider our offer."

"Where do I find you?"

"You don't find the Varia. The Varia finds you."

And with that, he jumped out the window and they both disappeared.

Dino stumbled into the room. "So...what'd I miss?"

* * *

><p><strong>Finally introduced the Varia! Though, Bel's character is OOC - but I though the eight year old version of him might be a little...different. I will try to snap the characters back in place.<strong>

**Please have a nice day; ciao! :]**


	10. Welcome to the Varia

Chapter 10 - Welcome to the Varia

I know the feeling of getting knocked out too well.

Your head hurts.

Your mouth feels like a sandpit.

And occasionally, like me, you get dreams.

_Great...Squalo was right. I did jinx myself. I bet you Dino's gonna go all 'its fate!' on me next I see him. _I remembered going to a restaurant. I remembered meeting a pianist (who looked suspiciously like Bianchi's little brother). And then...blank. So why was my subconscious automatically assuming that I was in a pinch?

"Sometimes, I really wonder whether I'm part of you," a voice I knew all too well tutted behind me. I swivelled my head immediately groaned.

"Oh joy. Alexandra Knight. To what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Hey – I actually _help _you remember?" she pointed out. "Do the world a favour and drop the sarcasm."

"I'm being sincere!" I grumbled back. "Honestly, I still don't get it; are you real or a figment of my imagination?"

"I'm a real person you moron! Now listen – the Varia needs you alive so -"

"The Varia? What've they got to do with me?"

"They're the fucking people who kidnapped you remember?" he practically exploded. Suddenly, she had a melodramatic epiphany. "Please don't tell me you have memory loss..."

Blink.

*Facepalm*

"All right. When you wake up, you're going to be around a bunch of dangerously hot people; called the Varia yeah?"

"Dangerously hot? So...they're actually not dangerous at all, but really good looking?" I questioned innocently.

"No! They're assassins that just happen to be REALLY good looking..." she remarked wistfully, in a fan-girl moment. "Bel's so cute! And Xanxus too but -"

"Uh...hate to ruin the moment, but what the hell is going on?"

"Wha – oh right! Look, you're not dead yet; so they probably need you alive -"

"_Probably_ need me alive? That ain't exactly reassuring. What if they don't?"

"Cross your fingers and hope to die? Scratch that, bad pun. Alright. Let's start from ground zero. When you wake up, don't do _anything_, and I mean ANYTHING that might possibly piss your captors off. Got that?"

"I'll think about it."

"Just don't –there's no point in arguing with you is there?" she reconsidered.

"Yup."

She sighed deeply, and reality took hold.

* * *

><p>"Holy magic jellyfish!" I ranted, sitting bolt upright. But my head hit a ceiling. Ceiling? No that couldn't be right...<p>

"Geez Bel, I think you gave her brain damage. Do I look like a 'magic jellyfish' to you?" a flamboyant looking guy complained.

I nodded, answering immediately. "Yes."

"My name's Lussuria!"

"Personally, that's not much better..." I grumbled back on instinct, sitting up and glanced vaguely around. Dang – lost my contacts. Now I was blind. Was I...in a limo?

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...peasant."

Oh no. That laugh. Anything but that laugh. _Wait. Why do I dread that laugh? _Suddenly, I was hit with a wave of horror. Varia. Lightning force. Prince. "You son of a –"

BANG. Right. Car. With a roof. A really hard roof.

"Honestly kid – I just spent like twenty minutes stitching you up; so do you mind calming down?" Lussuria protested, arms crossed like a little kid (coming from me, that's saying something).

I glanced at my palm, and saw that there was a relatively neat line of stitches that ran across. "Thanks..." I mumbled grouchily. Kidnapper or not, manners were important.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~..." The damn phony prince giggled from where he was lounging. Like one of those insane people who talked to themselves. _Wait. I do that_. Deciding that going around in circles would just give me a headache, I ignored him.

"You're probably wondering who we are," Lussuria continued, crossing his legs in a very feminine fashion.

"You're Varia," I murmured under my breath. "You made that very clear."

Lussuria continued, ignoring me. "That's Belphegor, we call him Bel. He's a prince."

"Doesn't matter what his damn name is, he's still a phony prince," I muttered to myself. Either it came out louder than I intended or Bel had really good ears; I found a perfect cut-out of my figure studded into the leather seat. "You missed," I mused. "Why exactly am I in a limo with two psychopathic killers?"

"We are _assassins_. Not psychopathic killers!" Lussuria scolded, as if he wasn't actually a killer, but some kid's transvestite mother.

"What's the difference?" I pushed on.

"One's a job and the other's a mental sickness!"

"Should I be seeing a difference?"

"Fine. What do you want?"

I made a face. _They're not going to answer any of my questions about being kidnapped, if they have any intelligence at all. And on second thoughts, I'm not screwed to ask either. _"I'm bored. I spy, you spy?"

"Hell no! There's no way a genius like me's going to sink that low," Bel replied snobbily.

"Tch. You guys don't seem very scary. Are you sure we're talking about the right Varia here?" I pondered. "Isn't the Varia meant to be all powerful, intimidating and ruthless? I gotta say, if this is it, I'm kinda disappointed."

"Would you like to see us all powerful, intimidating and ruthless?" Bel threatened.

I ignored him. "Come to think of it, you guys are just killing time, so to speak. If you really had business with me, you wouldn't exactly be sitting all nicely, right?" I decided. "Who're you really after?"

"Do you think we'd actually -"

"Wait – don't answer that. I've got it...it's Dino no wait; Squalo right?" I finally realized. "God I'm an idiot...he'd never join an assassination squad by choice; he's not a psychopathic killer -"

"For the last time: WE ARE NOT PSHYCHOPATHIC -"

"-always thought he was a little loopy. Considering the fact that you're coming after me and not him; it must mean he's already rejected you. Ah suck – you can't even get -" I drabbled on thoughtfully.

"Oi Lussuria….is she having a conversation with herself?" Bel whispered to the older boy.

"Is she usually like this?" Lussuria whispered back.

"How the fuck am I meant to know?" Bel pointed out.

"- which is why you can't kill me," I finished triumphantly. "Am I right?" Lussuria and Bel just looked at me like I was crazy. "Did I do something wrong?" I asked, confused.

They shared a glance. "Shut up, and sit still."

"Can you turn on the radio?"

"No."

"A CD?"

"No."

"Open a window?"

"No."

"Do you have AIDS?"

Bel leapt forward, and threw a cushion at my face. "Can you shut up?"

I frowned, shaking my head. "No. See? Now _you_ know how it feels."

* * *

><p><em>In Squalo and Dino's room...<em>

"Slow down Squalo!" Dino tried to coax, only to realise that his comments weren't improving Squalo's mood in the slightest.

But Squalo wasn't listening. He flipped through his clothes drawer and upturned everything on his desk, clearly searching for something.

"What are you looking for? I'll help..." Dino tried again.

"GPS," Squalo muttered while flicking through a few of his textbooks.

"Why do you need a GPS?" Dino murmured confused. "Can't you just borrow one?"

"It's special. You know that necklace she wears?"

"The shark one she doesn't take off?"

"Exactly. She always has it, so my Mom put in a transmitter and gave me the GPS for emergencies," Squalo explained.

Dino paused, and suddenly scrambled to his suitcase, and started flipping through it. "Is this it?" he asked, taking out a device that looked suspiciously like a PSP.

* * *

><p><em>In a limousine...<em>

"Pull over," the girl insisted.

"No," Bel snapped back.

"I'm gonna puke..." she fretted. (Puke - the magic word for any situation).

"Driver, pull over," Lussuria sighed, quickly tapping glass that separated the two compartments.

You got three minutes, peasant," Bel compromised. The girl ran out of the car into a nearby clump trees. Glancing once to make sure she didn't run off, Bel put his feet on the seat opposite of him and exhaled. That was one annoying bitch.

"You sure it's okay just to leave her alone?" Lussuria asked.

"Do you want to watch kid puke?"

"Fair point."

* * *

><p>I smirked as I ran.<p>

Without a doubt, they would find me. But I could at least buy time for Squalo, right? I had no idea where I was, but I reminded myself that every step I took was a step away from them.

The feeling was unbelievable.

_Crack. _Someone (or was it something?) was coming. I climbed a tree and tried to look inconspicuous. Was I being paranoid? This place looked like a national park of sorts – so it could've someone dumping a body. Or a rabid dog. But my luck didn't play out. It was that Belphegor freak.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I love hide and seek..." he declared, and turned to face me. My blood ran cold. I was twenty feet off the ground. There was a thick foliage of spring leaves in front of me. His eyes were definitely covered by his hair. How the hell did he know where I was? Unless...no way.

He must've had one of those creepy sixth sense things.

"Return to the vehicle," he ordered, staring me in the eye. Well...it was kinda implied through his hair.

"Don't want to."

"Return or die."

"I'll die thanks." Stepping off the branch and into air, I landed in a crouched position. "The real question is, are you going to kill me? You're ordered to bring me in alive, right?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...that would be naïve. My orders didn't say you had to be in one piece."

...Crap. Bel lunged forward, one of his weird looking knives in hand. I didn't know what to do. So I dived between his legs and ran.

I was furious. I'd been at Mafia High for almost five months; and there wasn't a single class labelled 'how to take down a phony prince 101' or '20 foolproof tricks to talk your way out of being hacked to pieces'. What would Squalo do?

Suddenly an image of Squalo with long hair and a sword strapped to his hand screaming 'VOI!' popped up in my head. I slapped myself. The day Squalo had long hair, would probably be the day hell freezed over.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...got you peasant..." Bel giggled, directly behind me. I cursed myself. I'd let my own fantasies get to my head again. I rolled and dodge, but Bel was just as fast.

"Oi Bel! Share the prey!" Lussuria chimed. Eh? Where did he come from?

"Face it, Squalo's never going to join your damn assassination squad; so why don't you just go that-a-way and I'll go in the opposite direction?" I offered brightly.

"Tch. The Varia needs recruitments. And everyone has their weaknesses - but your brother is what we would call a perfect candidate. He has no weaknesses," Lussuria began in a sing-song voice.

"_Physically,_" Bel interjected. "Then there's you. Call it sibling love."

"Ah ha! You don't actually know about our relationship, do you? What if I was to tell you that we hate each other and try to kill each other every day?" I lied convincingly. It wasn't much of a lie actually; Squalo enjoyed sparring too much.

"You've been alive for seven years. You even share a room with him. Seeing that neither of you are dead; it's obvious you get along just fine," Lussuria chipped in.

I made a face. "He's a _guy_. I don't share a room with him."

"We have evidence."

"No you don't."

The phony prince frowned. "Yeah, we _do_."

"No, you definitely don't."

"Stop wasting time!" he hissed, raising his knives. "Get back to the car."

"Limo."

"What?!"

I sighed. "I thought you were meant to be smart. Obviously, there's a difference between a car and a limo."

*Knife glints*

Great. Now I'd hit a brick wall. Time to improvise. "Tell you what. Let's play a game. You're coming after me, because you can't take on Squalo. And Squalo, without a doubt, knows the Varia has me. Just imagine what he'll do to you if he finds out that I'm dead?"

"But you're not dead," Lussuria pointed out. "Though you're making it rather tempting."

"Do you think he would care if it was _you_ who killed me, or if I committed suicide in _your_ hands?" I tested. I tried to take another step back, but my back hit wood. Now I'd hit a wood wall. Even better.

Belphegor laughed out loud. "You don't have the guts!" he sneered, throwing a knife beside my head. I raised an eyebrow, wondering on how serious he was.

"Uh Bel?" Lussuria muttered nervously.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...the peasant's not going to do it."

People fear death. It's simply human nature. It's fair to say that if you don't fear death, you're not quite human.

But I don't. (so strictly speaking, I'm a martian)

I was a fool when I was a kid. What's the big deal about living? No one can live forever. Death always wins, right?

So I slit my wrist.

I even felt at peace for a moment - and then the moment faded. Ouch. PAIN. As the world tipped on its side, I could only hear that freaky laugh...echoing over and over..._~Ushi shi shi shi~..._

* * *

><p><em>Dino and Squalo's room...<em>

"I've got it," Squalo muttered. He grabbed his sword, and made his way towards the door.

"I'll come with you," Dino decided, following.

Squalo froze. It was now or never. "Dino...I've been meaning to talk to you. There's something important I need to tell you."

Dino picked up his keys and twirled the key ring on his finger. "Is now the best time? Shouldn't we be going to save Serena about, I don't know, now?"

Squalo sighed, put down his sword and sat down; serious and glum. "Dino, I've been thinking and well..."

* * *

><p><em>Varia HQ...<em>

Tyr paced the room. Bel and Lussuria were late. How long could it take two _professional_ assassins to kidnap _one_ kid? Embarrassing.

As if on cue, the door slammed open and three figures stumbled through the door. Correction: two pushed and one stumbled.

"Our apologies Boss," Lussuria sighed.

"The peasant kept trying to escape," Bel growled.

Tyr stared at the child who seemed anything but terrified. It was downright unusual. "Five hours late. Honestly, why the hell did you bother tying her up? What happened to your hair Lussuria?"

* * *

><p>Hair. The bastard was talking about hair.<p>

I didn't wait for an answer. I elbowed Bel and Lussuria, and then made a wild dash for the window. Lussuria caught my left foot as my body passed through the window. He threw a 'see what I mean?' expression to his 'boss'.

"The peasant pretended she needed to puke and ran off – then tried to commit suicide; we took a detour to the hospital, tied up her to be careful – second time she broke the window at a police checkpoint and we were stuck in a car chase; third time she yelled in the driver's ear, the car fell off a cliff and exploded; he died – we gagged her and took a cab back," Bel finished in one breath. I personally thought that was rather impressive.

Tyr backhanded me.

At least the gag fell out. "All right, I probably deserved that one. I never thought the guy would actually drive us _off _the cliff. He has my condolences. Do you want me to pay compensation?" I offered as tears stung my eyes. I felt ready to collapse any second. Huh. I'd forgotten what excessive blood loss felt like.

Lussuria kneed me in the gut, pushing me butt first onto a sofa. Oh. Thanks for the seat.

"I probably deserved that one too. Sorry bout you hair. I mean, it'll grow back right? You don't look to bad – I mean; being half bald could be the newest...thing. And you could always wear a wig right?" I exclaimed, trying to sound enthusiastic. "You know, baldness doesn't determine age."

The only person who didn't seem offended by any of my comments, was their boss. "Yo, big guy. When my brother gets here, he'll beat the fucking shit out of you. And then he'll beat up your fucking shit."

The guy grabbed the front of my school shirt. "I'd like to see him _try_."

_Oh man, I feel light-headed. _"Your name's Tyr, right? If you rearrange that, it turns into try. So your name just oozes failure. It's like you don't know how to try," I giggled.

He let go of my shirt, and I fell back onto the sofa. "Take her downstairs. I don't have time to deal with this."

Bel grudgingly dragged me out of the room. I tried (lol, try) to remember the rights and lefts, but the place was a labyrinth. Finally, we came to a dungeon of sorts, and Bel threw me into the room.

I skidded down the stairs and rolled a few times on the metal floor. "Have a nice day phony prince!" I called after Bel. He ignored me.

Stuck.

Yet again.

* * *

><p><em>Meanwhile in the previous room...<em>

"Have you sent the message to Superbi Squalo?" Tyr snapped to a passing low rank member.

"He's already on his way."

"Hn. He'd better be worth the trouble."

"Lussuria, did you get what I asked for?" Tyr growled.

"Yes Boss. Took me a while to beat the information out of them though," Lussuria muttered, dragging a manila folder out of his inner coat pocket. "That school's security is as annoying as ever."

Tyr grabbed the folder and skimmed through it.

_Name: Serena di Squalo  
>D.O.B: Friday 13th June 19** (almost 8)<br>Blood Type: O_

_Height: 4'3"  
>Weight: 20.2 kg<br>BMI: 12, underweight_

__General Medical Report: Poor eyesight (-4.5); uses contact lenses, partial deafness, poor eye-foot coordination (careless), old injury on left arm (muscle damage), ADHD, mild dyslexia, mild autism. __

_Blood Relatives: Mother (deceased), Father (deceased), Aunt (deceased), older brother (see pg 3)_

_Appearance: White/Grey hair, grey eyes, usually seen with a hat, skinny, little muscle mass. (see photo)_

_Life summary: Currently attends Mafia High, first year student. Parents assassinated recently, good friends with Dino Cavallone (see pg 3); close with brother, otherwise socially inept. _

_Skills: Plays piano. Can fluently speak French, Japanese, Italian, English; rusty Spanish, Chinese, German and Russian. Utilises several martial art styles (including aikido, karate, taekwondo). Weapon choices vary, swords, archery. Immune to most drugs and poisons. Right handed._

_Killing history: 1 (see pg 15)_

_Notes: Serena is a good student, constantly annoys and argues with teachers (apparently unaware of this). Informal, appears unfocused, honest. Strong willed, bad at holding grudges. Wants to be 'alive', yet is seemingly unafraid of death. _

_Current Status: Alive_

"Boss, does this girl bother you?" Lussuria asked innocently.

"I thought she might make a good candidate for the Varia," Tyr shrugged.

"You think she has Varia quality?" Lussuria accused, clearly surprised. "She's still a _child_! Come to think of it, when you asked for her file, you hadn't even _met _her yet."

"She's one of a kind. You saw for yourself."

Lussuria made a face. "Wait, so we're just going to recruit her too?"

"No. She doesn't have the experience. It's not her nature to kill. It's her nature to die."

* * *

><p><em>In the Varia basement...<em>

I didn't know how long I'd been stuck in the cell.

I figured they were trying to make me lose my sanity. Too bad I'd already lost it. They'd taken my watch after I started counting every passing second out loud; but at least that told me someone was responsible for me. How thoughtful.

Air came through a vent I couldn't reach; light was artificial, and I couldn't hear anything outside the room. The door was bolted shut, metal into metal.

I'd fallen asleep at some point and woken up by the sound of footsteps. At the time, I'd had my legs tucked up to my chest and head resting against the wall. It was absolutely freezing; I could barely feel my fingers. The footsteps paused beside me, and a few seconds later, a foot prodded me.

"Hey! You don't know where that shoe's been..." I grumbled. "What is it now?" I saw a face a I didn't recognize. Definitely wasn't the pissed off guard I saw yesterday.

"I-I'm...I uh...was just delivering your uh...breakfast," the guy muttered awkwardly, setting down a tray and turning to leave.

"I'm sorry; thought you were the PMS'ing guy from yesterday. What's your name?" I asked kindly. This guy seemed like nice.

"I'm Raymond...Raymond Ferris," the guy murmured.

I stood up, dusted myself off and offered a hand. "Serena. You know, got here yesterday, kidnapped from school and all. Sup?" He took my hand, but looked like he was afraid that I was going to chew his face off or something. "Do you know what time it is?" I suddenly asked, worried that I'd overslept.

"9:30."

"Morning or afternoon?"

"Morning."

"You wanna share breakfast with me?"

"..."

So that's how we met. Raymond was a relatively ordinary guy; seventeen, tech genius and stuck working for the Varia. And he was pretty nice too; he even gave me his scarf when he realised I was freezing my ass off.

"Why'd you join?" I wondered. The guy really did look slightly depressed.

"Nobody joins the Varia by choice; except some of the high ups. Like Belphegor? He's the first in a while. They made me join when I was 13. Missed out on my teen years coz of them," he sighed. "Not everyone in the Varia's that bad though. It's just the assassins you gotta be careful of - they're assholes most of the time."

"Yeah...I figured as much," I sighed. "What's up with the Tyr guy? I thought the Varia was part of the Vongola family? Serving the Ninth and all?"

"I'm not too sure about that; when the Ninth came to power, the Varia was formed, and Tyr mysteriously became the leader."

"That reeks of a textbook answer."

He laughed. "Fair enough. No one likes him; he has crazy mood swings; he's just no fun to be around. Not much of a leader either."

"I'd always heard the Vongola Ninth was a real swell guy. If he approves of Tyr kidnapping and exploiting a bunch of kids, he must really be a jackass."

"He's a good man," Raymond argued. "Though I agree he makes some shit-assed decisions. Ah sorry, I swore..."

"Big deal. I'd go insane if I don't hear a 'fuck' or a 'shit' every now and then. So I hope Squalo beats the living shit out of the both of them. Tyr first. The Ninth can wait."

Raymond looked solemn. "Tyr is the current sword emperor - *realises blank face* - which pretty much means he's like the best swordsman in the world. There's only ever one sword emperor - and I've never heard him lose a battle before."

"My brother's never lost a battle either," I insisted defiantly.

"Yeah, well, I dunno what they've decided, but you can't guarantee that they're going to go one on one. Everyone's hoping someone replaces Tyr. The Varia's a shithole these days, people aren't even scared of us any more."

Well, I couldn't argue with that. "Why don't you just leave or quit?" I pointed out. "It's obvious you hate it here."

He sighed deeply. "The only way you can leave the Varia, is in a coffin."

"Wood or metal?"

"Cardboard."

"That sucks."

"That's life."

There was a crackle from his pocket, and I saw him take out a walkie talkie like thing. "_Bring the prisoner to the field. Over_."

"Looks like you're bro's here," he announced, standing up.

* * *

><p>Squalo was pissed. He'd spent the whole night catching various trains and buses to get to the Varia headquarters, and he hadn't even given a second thought onto what he would do once he got there. His mind had been rooted completely on the horrible words he had said to Dino.<p>

"_You're just going to get in my way. Don't you know when you're not wanted, Cavallone?"_

He didn't really think of Dino like that. He didn't want his friend involved in his mess. Dino deserved more than that; and ending their friendship wasn't easy. He could only wish that one day, Dino would understand.

As the Varia mansion came into his view, he quickly listed the options he had. An all out attack? Silent assassination? A diversion?

But they were already waiting.

Squalo scowled. _Fuck this shit._

* * *

><p>The moment I saw Squalo, my heart fluttered. Well, since I didn't have my contact lenses, I could only make out his blurry figure. "Squalo!" I proclaimed, kicking Bel in the stomach and began to run towards Squalo. Unfortunately, Bel grabbed my ankle and I fell on my face.<p>

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...gotcha, peasant bitch."

I kicked him in the face. In return he pulled me to my feet by my hair.

"VOI! Let her go!" Squalo boomed, drawing his sword.

"Put the sword away kid, or the girl gets it..." Tyr growled, sword in front of my neck.

Calmly, I pushed away his blade with two fingers. "Squalo! You came. Wow. Did you know, they have _oatmeal _for breakfast here? Awful. Just...bleurgh. How's life?"

"Are you okay?" he asked, a touch of concern in his voice.

_That...is not a proper answer_. "Nah, these people aren't that bad," I stated with a shrug. "They're not that scary or dangerous if that's – *insert whack on the head* - what you mean."

I glared at Bel. He smirked back and stuck out his tongue me.

"Go fuck yourself, you phony prince..."

"Watch your mouth _peasant_."

"I am not a fucking _peasant_!"

"Shut up you two!" Levi hissed.

"Shut your pie hole you pervy old man!" Bel and I yelled in unison. Realizing we'd said the same thing, we glared daggers at each other.

"You two are more alike than you know it you know!" Lussuria advised.

"How dare you compare me to a peasant!" Bel threatened.

"If you want us to start treating you like a prince, you're going to have to pay upfront," Mammon concluded.

"A prince doesn't have to pay to prove his royalty," Bel theorized. "And if you question my royalty again, I'll skewer you," he continued, flipping out a handful of knives.

"VOI! What the hell are you people doing?" Squalo yelled, clearly pissed that they'd completely ignored him for the past few minutes.

"Join the Varia, or the girl dies," Tyr proposed. (They cringed at remembering that their boss had been there the whole time).

"She dies; you all die!" Squalo warned menacingly.

"I vote we pull out her fingernails one at a time," Levi suggested. "Or electrocution."

"Nah, I was wandering around the other day and I found a medieval rack; I've always wanted to see someone with all their joints dislocated," Mammon shrugged casually. "Just think about how much money you could earn along the way..."

"Brutal beating's a personal favourite," Lussuria mused. "I suppose sensory deprivation works too."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~... cutting body parts off is a classic," Bel conceded. "The blood smell's wonderful."

"Uh...Squalo? Is this the Varia you told me about for my assignment? They seem kinda...anticlimatic. Can I go home now?" I yawned.

"Everyone SHUT UP!" Tyr hollered.

"You shut up," I muttered quietly.

Squalo made up his mind. "You're Tyr right? Let's make a deal. One on one combat with any one of you assholes. I lose, you can have her. I win; I take her and the Varia leaves us alone."

"You either join or don't join; if you do, she walks free. If you don't, I'm sure they'd enjoy her company..." Tyr assured, the edge of his sword lightly tracing my face. "However, if you challenge me to one on one combat you'll die, and then we'll have fun with her."

"And what if I win?" Squalo pushed on.

"If by some chance you do kill me, you'll be promoted to and Officer," Tyr reasoned. "From there, you determine the safety of your sister."

"How is that fair?" I yelled, sick of being used as leverage. "I'll kill you all!"

They ignored me.

"Deal or no deal?" Tyr asked forcefully.

"Deal," Squalo muttered, scowling. He'd just kill everyone else afterwards.

"No deal!" I interjected. "Squalo, just walk away!"

"I got you into this mess, and if this is what frees you then done!" Squalo insisted. "I'm not walking away without you!"

"You can't quit the Varia! Ever! And how can you trust these people? What if they don't keep their word?" I accused.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...the Varia always keeps its promises," Bel claimed. Why did that reek of a lie?

"Then let's start," Tyr finished suddenly and began to charge.

"All right then. Let's go kid," Levi growled, picked me up and slung me over his shoulder.

"OI! Sexual abuse! Physical abuse! 911!" I screeched, trying to get a headlock around Levi's head.

All I could do was watch, as Squalo and Tyr became blurs.

* * *

><p>1237. Again. I punched the wall as hard as I could. 1238. And again. 1239. I was the weak link. 1240. Squalo was in a risky fight because of me. 1241. And I couldn't even escape. 1242. My hands were bruised to the bone; if not fractured; but I was too pissed to realize.<p>

It'd been at least two hours since the start of their fight; and as I was neither free or dead, I assumed the fight was ongoing.

A ten minute sword fight could feel like a year of torture. Even the best swordsmen couldn't last forever; eventually one of them would run out of stamina.

Eventually one of them would die.

I drifted out of my thoughts when I heard the lock being undone. Quickly, I stood in the middle of the room in a fighting stance.

This could be it.

But it was just Raymond. "I've got lunch. You okay?" he muttered suspiciously, looking at my hands. Relieved, I slunk into a more casual position and shrugged. "Your brother's definitely better than I thought he would be..." he continued, trying to cheer me up. "He might actually have a shot at this."

Suddenly I had an escape plan.

"Raymond?" I muttered questionably, guilt rising in my chest.

"Wassup?" he asked brightly.

"I'm sorry."

"What for?"

I knocked him out.

Originally I'd been planning to do a strike to the temple, but I changed my mind mid strike and hit his neck instead. I managed to sort of catch him before he hit the ground, but I felt terrible.

Alarm bells started ringing the moment I left the room. In that spilt second, I decided. Hell with it all; if they attempted to kill me, then they were as good as dead. If they didn't, then they'd live. Simple as that.

* * *

><p>"<em>Emergency transmission! Emergency transmission! All units alert! Prisoner on the loose! Emergency lockdown!"<em>

Urgh. About time they sent a message.

CRASH! Great. I ran into another person – a maid this time. She stared at me and tried to back away, terrified.

"I'm sorry! If I don't die, I'll give you a proper apology," I insisted, getting back up. "You wouldn't happen to know where the exit is? *insert frozen face* Never mind then. Have a nice day!" I ducked and knocked the breath out of another guy.

I opened a few more doors before I entered a fancy living room: plush carpets, drapes, a complete bar; shit like that. I didn't see the exit, so I turned around to leave - but found the giant pervy guy in my path. What was his name again? Pretty sure it was well known jeans brand...

"YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" he growled, opening his arms which made the umbrellas on his back mysteriously open and charge with electricity.

"Oh shut up Gandolf!" I yelled back, pushing off a couch and aimed a kick at him in his neck. Bullseye. The umbrellas dropped to the floor, useless.

About to leave, I had some deperate feeling to turn around and jump – was that what Squalo called instinct? Not a second too late either – Lussuria. "Don't get overconfident that you beat Levi; he's the weakest of the officers," he gloated.

I blinked. _You're the one who sounds overconfident. _"Nice job with the hair. Mohawk. Yup. Now if you don't mind, I'm just gonna go..." I muttered, making hand motions towards the door.

Suddenly Lussuria started circling me; and the guy was fast. Good footwork. "You know Lussuria, fancy feet ain't gonna make you win," I chided, choosing the right place to stand.

"Sayonara!" Lussuria sang as he jumped up, flipped and aimed his knee at my head and grinned evilly.

I rolled my eyes, waited for the absolute last moment and sidestepped.

There was no way he could change direction mid-jump; and I'd been standing in front of the bar. I estimated he'd destroyed twenty thousand dollars worth of liquor.

"It's _arrivederci_, jackass..." I shrugged to myself as I used Levi as a human bridge. The alcohol had created a large puddle.

I felt like I was going in circles; but the rooms were different every time. _Crash!_ Guy's bathroom. _Crash! _Room full of violin cases and AK-47's. _Crash!_ Games room. _Crash!_ Kitchens. Frustrated, I kicked open the last door in the corridor.

Oh. Just my luck. A certain prince was waiting with his feet on the table. (Honestly; wouldn't a prince know better?)

It was a dining room. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...what luck," he speculated, standing up and started striding towards me. "I'm in a bad mood, so I might as well try a new technique...stay still, will you?"

_Hell no!_ I bolted, skidding underneath the dining table – which was thankfully huge. As the lack of friction kept me sliding, I saw knives thud through the table in a line, as if they were following me. As I shot out the other end, Bel jumped on me; unarmed. He threw a few punches, I threw a few back.

I couldn't decide what he was doing; one moment he was attacking, the next he was laughing at his own reflection. He was just like those people in mental hospitals; moving around like he was drunk, giggling more than usual. What was with this guy? I'd only managed to make his nose bleed.

Suddenly, I caught him in a leg lock; he got me in an arm lock.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...if you move, you won't be able to move that arm for three days..." he threatened.

I tried to shift my position a little, but his vice-like grip held me there. "Oh yeah? You won't be able to walk for _four_."

His smiled grew larger. "First to the finish then?"

_What finish line?!_ In the end, it was his move. He cracked my shoulder, I cracked his leg. I gritted my teeth and shut my eyes as tightly as I could. When I opened my eyes, I tried to ignore the red tinge in my eyesight.

But I was out. I could see the exit. And there was no one left to stop me. Except Viper. Well...that's what I knew him as. I was pretty sure the other Varia people called him Mammon or something.

"Serena di Squalo...I didn't think I would see you again," he droned with a bored expression.

"Same here, Viper. Though technically, I just saw you," I pointed out. "So how's life? Making some good coin?"

"Are you kidding? The Varia's salary epic. And it's Mammon. But I'm going to get a sweet bonus if I catch you," he sighed. "Which means you can't leave this building!" Mammon raised his hands dramatically.

I blinked. Was something meant to happen?

"Which one is real?" he continued, all mystical like.

"Um...you're right there," I pointed. "Is this a joke or something? Wait give me a sec..." I quickly shook my head to clear my mind, and put on a confused expression. "Oh my God! You disappeared! It's magic!"

Mammon was gobsmacked. No one had ever seen through his illusion. And yet, she wasn't mocking him – she was trying to make _him _feel better.

"I was going to beat you up, but thanks for the being nice to me when I was like, younger. Ciao!" I waved, and ran outside the door.

Mammon stared at the closing door. He now had no doubts that this was the girl from the prophecy Luche had predicted.

* * *

><p>I grinned to myself. I'd made it out of that shithole. Finally. All I had to do was get through the woods, then blend in with the public. Squalo and Tyr would probably be somewhere in the woods; I'd make sure he saw me – and we'd leave together. End of story.<p>

Well...that was the general idea. I heard dogs barking, glanced back and when I turned around again, I ran straight into a low branch.

Ouch. Trees hurt. A lot.

My mind froze, and I sat blankly for what felt like seconds; but must've been minutes. _I swear I'll burn down every tree I ever see! Wait. That's bad for the environment._

I'd failed.

Because of a damn tree.

* * *

><p><em>The Epic Duel...<em>

Squalo ducked, and tried to hack at the guy – he got him; just a small nick, but it was better than nothing. They'd fought throughout the whole night; he was out of energy. He hadn't slept for three days, or eaten for two. His pride was the only thing that kept him going.

They clashed swords again, and Squalo pushed Tyr back. They were both panting.

"Five minutes?" Squalo muttered.

"Three."

Careful not to turn his back to the older man, he ripped up his jacket and did a basic tourniquet on what remained of his left arm. He was almost there; understanding Tyr's movements were becoming easier. He still couldn't believe that his hand was gone for good; but he reminded himself that it was just a small price to pay.

More than one life depended on this battle.

When he looked up, he saw that a messenger was talking to Tyr. "It seems she ran into a tree – she's heavily sedated in the medical wing at the moment."

"And the casualties?"

"Well...uh... 29 dead, 32 injured and 14 in intensive care," the guy said nervously. "What do you want us to do with her?"

Tyr considered for a moment, and made up his mind. "It seems we have a new recruit. A fine officer. And if she needs some persuasion, I'm sure you can think of something."

"VOI!" Squalo was pissed. That was without a doubt – Serena. He couldn't let her join an _assassination squad_. It wasn't her nature. "That wasn't part of the deal you fucking asshole!" he exploded, charging at Tyr.

And so the fight ensued.

* * *

><p><em>In the nicer part of the Varia HQ...<em>

When I thought back, that was the first time I dreamt of my reality. Before it'd always been about Alexandra, or some delusional dream about recent events in my life. But this dream was just so realistic...

Squalo was battling Tyr. He'd lost his left hand – on purpose. But he won. I just couldn't decide at the time on whether it was a vision, or another delusional dream.

I woke up slowly, not even remembering going to sleep. White walls. IV drips. Pyjamas. The beeping of a heart monitor. Yup, I was back in a hospital. Again.

Guilt. The burden was heavy. I killed people. I hurt people. People that didn't really deserve to die. One of my arms was in a sling. Right. That damn prince dislocated my shoulder. Shifting my other arm, I heard a gentle clink of metal. Handcuffs. They'd be overly thick if they hadn't taken precautions.

I heard a sigh. "It seems you do have unnatural abilities."

"And you are...?"

"Lawson. Doctor actually, but titles don't matter here," the guy muttered. He was sitting in a chair a metre or two away from me.

I tried to squint to get a better view of his face, but I could only get as far as grey hair and thin glasses.

"Don't squint. How do you feel?"

I had to think about that for a second. "Like I went to hell, lost a few things and came back."

"Yeah well, getting electrocuted, knocked out, attempting suicide, going on a rampage against the world's most dangerous assassination squad and running head first into a tree all within the span of three days kinda does that to you. I'm supposing that the morphine's not working on you either?" he questioned in a doctorly way.

"Not a chance. Your diagnosis?"

"Serious concussion."

A few seconds of silence passed between us, before he spoke again. "You seem to be taking this quite well. Anyone else would've passed out by now."

"Yeah, well, the mafia does that to you. And I just went on a rampage, and you're asking _me _how I'm feeling," I began, almost angry. "Logically speaking, the Varia would've killed me. So why am I in a hospital being 'looked after'?"

"Tyr's last command was to recruit you," Lawson sighed. "As an officer, no less. Well, you did cause quite a bit of havoc."

What? Recruit? That wasn't important. Had that dream become reality? "Where's Squalo? He's alive, right? Holy shit, tell me he's alive!"

"Your brother won the fight; but we couldn't save his left hand. He's fatigued and suffering from blood loss - though it should be a smooth recovery."

"Can I see him then...?"

"No." It wasn't Lawson that replied. It was Bel. That stupid prince.

"I see you're on crutches. Squalo won. What's the meaning of this shit?!" I demanded.

"Let's chat."

"Great. Hello, how are you? I'm fine thank you, how about you? Oh not too bad. Nice weather? Oh, definitely. You know what? I've really enjoyed our little chat - so if you don't mind, I'm just going to see my brother."

"Ah, but I do recall, there's a pair of handcuffs on your left hand," Bel reminded me. "The hospital bed's bolted into the ground. Good luck getting out of that, peasant."

Dang. Didn't think that far.

"Why do you care? Tyr's dead; and no one liked him anyway! I bet his mother committed suicide. So why are you following a dead man's orders?" I asserted.

"Let's rephrase this. I follow the _Varia's_ orders; and the last order the _Varia_ gave out was to sign you up."

"Tch. Working for trash. Some _prince_. You can do whatever you want with me, but I ain't joining," I advised.

He frowned, clearly irritated. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...I've been thinking; torture, drugs, threats; and this is the best I've come up with," Bel giggled darkly and turned on a T.V in the corner. There was a grainy image – but I could clearly see Squalo.

"This is, as Lawson said here, two doors down. I'll prove it." Bel hobbled outside the room, and seconds later, appeared on the screen, grinning as madly as ever. He went right next to Squalo, prodded his face a few times and came back into my room.

I felt my hands clench, and I could hear the heart monitor quicken its pace. "Whoopdidoo. I'm so scared."

"Now, I popped down to our research facility, and look at what I found!" he sang, pulling out a test tube marked 'Chimera'.

"Let me guess. You watched a movie called Mission Impossible 2, and now you're going to put an incurable disease on my brother," I informed sarcastically. "Well that ain't gonna work. Technically, Squalo's a Varia Officer now. You're not allowed to kill him; so suck."

Bel grinned cynically. "Lawson – I believe you were one of the creators. Care to explain?"

"Chimera was just the name taken because of the movie – but it's actually a lot worse," Lawson explained grimly. "The thing is, it doesn't kill you. It just puts you in an unimaginable amount of pain until it receives its antidote: Bellerophon. It's been tested a few times, and the test subjects all went to mental facilities afterwards, with or without the antidote. Belphegor won't be in trouble if he doesn't kill your brother."

*blink*

"YOU – GOD DAMN – SADISTIC – PEOPLE – LET – MY – BROTHER – GO!" I went crazy, thrashing around in my bed, trying to make a grab at Bel. "I – SWEAR – YOU'LL – WISH – YOUR – ROYAL – ASS – THAT - "

My head was killing me. The strain probably wasn't the best thing for my body, but I was too exasperated to care. Lawson administered some weird medicine.

"GET – YOUR – HANDS – OFF – ME!" I yelled, cringing a little when I felt a needle stab my gut.

"That was uncalled for, Belphegor," Lawson muttered as the room started going in weird shades of blue.

"Oh I'm sorry. Look peasant, I don't tell you how to do your job, so you don't tell me how to do mine. Got that, _doctor_?" Bel sneered.

I laughed. "You know, now that I think about it, you've got no proof that that's actually a really dangerous drug," I growled, slighty dizzy.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...excellent – I always to test this on someone," Bel remembered, taking a syringe from his pocket, hobbling to me. "Video camera, anyone?"

"You can't be doing this! If you administer Chimera to her, she could die!" Lawson argued.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...then, how would you like to be the guinea pig?" Bel wondered darkly. "Such a kind man, volunteering to give your life away for a girl you just met..."

"H-Hold on a second!" Lawson panicked, backing to a wall.

"Bel. Stop it," I warned.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...why should I? He defied an officer; that's a punishable crime in the Varia," Bel recalled.

All right. Lawson stood up for me. He risked his life. Squalo risked his life. The loss of his arm was on my conscience. ...My brain hurt.

These were the times in which I would make the worst decisions; but fuck the world. What'd I have to lose? I'd already lost my dignity. "Lawson was only protecting another Varia Officer. You have no right to punish him," I insisted.

"Another Varia Officer...?"

I glared, and took a deep breath. "I'll join the fucking Varia."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...nice doing business with you, peasant."

* * *

><p><strong><strong>Humor seems to be pretty low these past few chapters; sorry about that. Dino doesn't appear that much either... <strong>****I never really figured out Tyr's personality, so this is my version of him. **

**Have a nice day, ciao~! :]**


	11. To be a Varian

Chapter 11 - To be a Varian

"You know, I swear your room's nicer than mine," I announced to Squalo, walking through the unlocked door. "I mean, your windows don't actually open. How epic is that?"

"Doesn't that defy the purpose...?" Squalo replied without looking up from his booklet. _Squalo's reading...well well well, isn't this a rare sight._

"Yeah...well...it's not like you're ever going to fall out a window," I responded grimly, sitting on his bed.

It'd been exactly nine hours, twenty seven minutes and fourteen seconds since we'd joined the Varia. Unofficially that is; we still had a 'coronation' from the Ninth.

Truth be told, we should've been in the medical wing, confined to hospital beds. But Squalo healed quickly; and I didn't like being lazing around in a bed. Lawson 'strongly advised' that it wasn't the best idea, but I wasn't in the mood to follow almost definitely crucial advice.

"Are you gonna go back?" I questioned subconsciously.

"Back where?"

"You know what I mean. School."

Squalo sighed, and put down his book. "Tch. I don't want to."

"Don't want to, or cant?" I asked knowingly. "Dino gets it you know."

Squalo looked down. As in the direction, down. He didn't really have the energy for emotions. "Are you going back?"

"Maybe. So I feel normal." I stood up and looked wistfully at the outside world, enjoying the light _pitter patter _of the rain.

He nodded and turned back to his pamphlet, but put it down almost immediately. "Serena, you can't just drag an injured arm – they invented slings for a reason," Squalo chided while rolling his eyes. "How many times have I -"

"Four. I just don't _like _slings; I mean; you never wear one either," I pointed out. _How does he always know?_

"I'm older than you," Squalo replied knowingly.

"Pulling the 'I'm older' line at a time like this? Play fair. And plus: this is the fourth time we've had this conversation. You know how it's gonna end."

Squalo put an arm up in defeat. "I'm sorry. This is probably the worst thing that could've happened...I mean - you joined an assassination squad and you haven't even hit puberty!" he said, voice cracking a little.

"If anyone should be sorry; it should be me. Your arm..."

Squalo laughed lightly. "You're sorry; I'm sorry. Our contracts aren't that bad; we'd be millionaires after a year...if we survive." He lifted what he was reading – and I just managed to make out the words 'Welcome to the Varia!' (which for some reason had an overly happy cartoon skeleton on the front cover).

_So that's what he was reading..._

* * *

><p>I wasn't really surprised when my uniform was a perfect fit – they knew more about me than I knew about myself. It's a shame it was designed for guys though. It was roomier in places I didn't quite prefer.<p>

'~Ushi shi shi shi~...you're late...' was definitely not what I was expecting to hear when I went to get dinner. I was expecting something among the lines of 'I'm gonna skewer you!' or 'DIE PEASANT'.

There were only seven places set for the table; one for the boss, and six for the officers. Bel, Mammon and Lussuria sat on one side; I was stuck between Squalo and Levi on the other.

"So, who's going to be the next boss?" It was Lussuria who asked the question.

"I heard the Ninth was going to choose someone; they said he had his eyes on one of us," Levi replied.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...then I'm obviously the most logical choice..." Bel snickered.

"Are you kidding? I'm better suited than all of you _put _together," Lussuria bragged.

I snorted. "There is absolutely no way he's gonna choose any one of you." Unfortunately, their ears were all sharp, and my mutter turned into an insult.

"Care to explain, Serena?" Levi grunted beside me.

"You guys don't even have _normal _names; you're named after demons. Personality wise, you'd only use your power for your personal gain," I pushed on. _But...if that happens, then I don't have to worry about being in the Varia for too long...but then again, if that does happen, they'd probably kill everyone they don't like...including me. Ah fuck..._

"So what; you think you should be boss?" Mammon tempted.

"There's nothing in it for me. I don't see the point," I sighed.

"Let's have a vote!" Lussuria decided out of the blue. "Vote for who you want to be boss!"

"That's stupid; everyone's just going to vote for themselves," I murmured to myself, staring at my peas.

"I vote for Lussuria!"

"Mammon."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...Belphegor."

"Leviathan."

Squalo sighed. "Superbi Squalo."

I stared at my peas, imagining they would jump around on the table and explode in the other Varia member's faces. Now THAT would be real entertainment.

"Well, who do you vote for?" Levi growled, elbowing me. I was really starting to hate this guy...

"Huh? I vote for the Tyr."

"Someone alive, obviously."

"The Ninth."

"They gotta be in _this _room."

"Fine. I choose the chandelier."

"Stop fucking with us kid!"

"Who would want to fuck you?"

"Levi! Serena! Play nice! Serena, it's gotta be a _person _in _this _room."

I took a moment to consider, and made up my mind. "Superbi Squalo."

"What?!" Squalo choked on a piece of broccoli. _Squalo's always eating broccoli...he's always choking on it too. Maybe it's a health hazard..._

"Him?!"

"Calm your farm woman..." I stated under my breath, pretending to be fascinated by a carrot. Wait a sec. Did I just call a male assassin 'woman'?

When I looked up again, a fight had already started. Food was flying and Levi, Lussuria, Squalo and Bel were all trying to beat the crap out of each other. Picking up my plate, I stood up, caught a flying chunk of potato, crawled underneath the table and came up next to Mammon. He was money obsessed, but at least he was against violence, right? "So uh...does this happen a lot?" I murmured, pointing at the fight.

"It was bound to happen eventually..." he replied casually, catching a piece of chicken. "Repairs come out of our budget. Pass the pepper will you?"

I passed a smile when I saw Squalo smash bottles of red wine in their faces. Although I didn't want to admit it, he fitted right in. "You been here long?"

"Long enough. What do you want to know?"

"I was just wondering...are there any girls in the Varia? Other than the maids I mean," I asked.

"Your uniform doesn't look that bad on you. You should wear guys' clothes more often. They're a lot cheaper."

"..."

He smirked before answering properly. "We've only ever had three female assassins in the Varia before; first died within the week, second's in a mental facility rambling about fried eggs - and we killed the third when she got pregnant."

Levi stabbed Bel with a butter knife, and I swerved to the left as Bel kicked him off the table. I sighed and ate another pea. "I'm going to call it a night. You should sleep soon, Mammon."

"Hn."

* * *

><p>Nightmares. I'd never recalled them being so...violent. Or realistic.<p>

Left, right, no evil world domination guy eating marshmallows. I let out a sigh of relief. But who was the guy with the black hair and guns? Xanxus...I felt like I should know him.

I took a deep breath, and sat up. There was no way I was going to be able to fall asleep now. For once, I wanted to go to school. It felt like something I should do – it felt like the place I needed to be. It had to be better than morning discussion with the Varia.

After I found my cleaned (and fixed) school uniform, I wandered around, contemplating on how I was going to _get _to school.

* * *

><p><em>Several hours later...<em>

"VOOOOIIIIII! She WHAT?" Squalo stormed.

"Calm down, newbie. So she went to school. What's the big deal?" Bel drawled while sipping a cup of hot chocolate.

"BIG DEAL? She's _Serena_. That leaves A LOT OF ROOM FOR ERROR!" Squalo exploded; dark and gloomy.

"And the Ninth's coming too..." Mammon sighed, glancing at a watch.

"VOI! Hell with that! I'm going after her," Squalo growled, picking up his sword from the table.

"Are you sure you should do that? You ain't exactly in tiptop condition; you know, missing an arm and all," Lussuria considered. "And what are you going to do? Drag her back? I highly doubt you'd succeed."

"I'll think of something!" he shot back.

"Superbi Squalo." The two words weren't spoken unkindly; and Squalo turned around, eyes narrowing.

The Ninth.

"Where did he even come from?" Levi whispered to Lussuria.

"How the hell am I meant to know? Maybe he has magical powers or something..." Lussuria declared quietly back.

"The Ninth doesn't have magical powers, I can tell you that much," Mammon droned.

"The real question is: how long's he been here?" Bel murmured.

"As the Ninth boss of the Vongola family, I hereby appoint you, Superbi Squalo as an assassin of the Vongola Family's independent assassination squad. Will you serve and honor the Varia to the best of your ability?" the old man inquired.

With a sigh, Squalo looked up and spoke. "You say that as I have a choice, Ninth."

"You do. Join the Varia, or have the Varia and the entire Vongola family hunt you down," the Ninth offered gently.

"Thought as much..." Now that the Ninth was in his face, it was a little hard to pick up a knife and stab him. "I accept your offer. I'll serve. Now if you'll excuse me," Squalo bowed hastily, turned and reached for the door.

"You know, you shouldn't worry about your sister - she just boarded a train. Until the new boss for the Varia is decided, I am responsible for all your actions," the Ninth called after him. "So you will stay here. Belphegor, please come with me. You've got a mission to complete."

Squalo couldn't even say anything.

* * *

><p><em>In Mafia High...<em>

I stifled a yawn as I walked back onto school grounds. I couldn't believe I was doing this. What the hell was I doing here? I turned around and started walking away from my school. _Fuck no! Screw the Varia._ Changing direction again, I made up my mind. I wanted my ordinary life back. As boring and uneventful as it had been.

The familiar steps to my room were walked with a blank mind. I didn't even realize Dino running towards me until he tackled me with a hug.

"Serena! You're alive!" he cheered, his grin stretching from ear to ear.

"Dino...shoulder...can't breathe..." I managed to choke out without screaming. He let go of me.

"Ah...sorry..." he grinned sheepishly. "Dislocated shoulder?"

I nodded. "What's up?"

"The Cavallone war's over – we made a truce...but my Dad's injured." His eyes drooped a little. "I've left you a note – but I'm kinda in a hurry. Watch out for yourself 'kay?"

I watched him run away, and heard him crash down the stairs just round the corner. *Sigh*

There wasn't much in Dino's note; just a few assignments I'd missed out on and exam notifications. But he did leave a P.S.

_Just so you don't complain that I never told you, I'm probably just going to be a regular student, not a boarder. If need someone to talk to, I'll always be there for you. Visit my place every now and then, okay?_

_Before I forget, you have a new school timetable (courtesy of the Varia); it should be on your bed. Your yearly exams are in a few months; top prize is graduation. Thought you should know._

_Try to stay in one piece,_

_Dino._

I folded the letter up carefully, and tucked it in my pocket. Glaring at my new timetable, I scrunched it up and put on a spare set of contact lenses. It took a moment to adjust. I twirled my walking stick in my hands on last time and left.

* * *

><p>Let me explain something. There's training, sparring, then THE cage.<p>

A completely uncontrolled fight zone - a fight only ends when someone dies or is knocked unconscious. Cowards are punished. Weaklings are shamed. Courtesy of the Varia huh? Bastards.

"Cadet! You're late!" a man barked at me.

_Cadet? Does that guy think this is a military school or something?_ "Uh...sorry? I'm the new stud- I mean uh...cadet? Serena di Squalo? I think now is the best time to say -"

"Ah! You're the one that messed with the Varia," he mused, stroking an imaginary beard. "You're number 13. Get in the cage. Blindfolds! 4 to 8 are your opponents!"

"Hang on a sec! I never agreed to -" I tried to argue as someone blindfolded me, and pushed me through what might've been a door. I barely kept my balance. "You know, I think there's been this great big misunder -"

"Fight fight fight!" people began to chorus.

"I have no idea why they've sent us a kid, but it's your funeral," a harsh voice sneered.

I put up two hands in defense."I'm really not in the mood to - "

"Ha ha! Time to die!"

* * *

><p><em>100 meters away...<em>

"Thank you for escorting me. I appreciate it," the Ninth thanked as he looked around.

"No, it's an honor to have you here, Ninth!" the principal stammered, bowing hastily for the umpteenth time. The two men continued walking over the freshly mown grass in a few seconds of silence. "So, um...what brings you here today?"

"Serena di Squalo...how much can you tell me about her?"

"Drives half her teachers crazy, pisses the hell off the other. She's too gentle for the mafia, personally. But she's got determination, I'll give her that much. Wasn't she taken by the Varia the other day?"

"I received intel that she returned today. To answer your question, I'm here to appoint her as the Varia's newest Officer," the Ninth explained.

"What? Why would they want someone like her?"

"We'll soon see."

* * *

><p>The next minute or so of my life felt like...scratch that.<p>

Imagine that a truck crashes into you, runs you over - starts to drive away – but then reverses back onto you and finally, the driver laughs manically away.

The teacher put a hand over his eyes and sighed. Such a disappointment... "All right! Fight's over. Suck it up and try harder next time."

"No." I coughed and forced myself up, drawing my walking stick (it was surprisingly loyal these days). I only had one arm, I couldn't see and I could barely walk, but there wasn't much to it. They were surprisingly weak – a few good swings here and there; and they hit the floor one by one. They didn't even last half a minute.

"H-how...?"

I smirked. "When you were all trying to kill me, you were attacking each other - your senses are average. And your swearing was grammatically incorrect. So to sum it up: all brawn, no brains. Better luck next time, assholes."

I ripped off the blindfold with my good arm and limped over the door. "Hey you, can you open the door now?"

"S–S–Sure!" one of them squeaked.

Using a dark glare, I walked up to the shocked teacher. "You. Are. One. Of. The. Most. STUPID people I have ever met!" I yelled at the top of my lungs. "I quit! You know what? I NEVER JOINED IN THE FIRST PLACE. Fuck off!"

I flipped him off, turned on my heel and bumped into my principal. Whoops. "Where do you think you're going?" he bellowed.

"My room," I informed. "Nice meeting you, but I'm just going to go that-a-away." I stepped around him and picked up my hat from the dirt.

"Don't you dare walk away from me young lady!"

"You forgot something, principal. I'm not a young lady. I, am a _child_." I walked away, but found another man in my path. An old one. I muttered a quick apology and went left.

He went left.

I went right.

He went right.

Now, when you're in the mafia and something like that happens, it's not usually a coincidence. In fact, I no longer believed in coincidences. I elongated my walking stick. "Do I know you?"

The old man chuckled, and dropped to my level. So he was looking down on me, huh? "You don't know who I am?"

"Should I?" People around me started gaping, and their shocked faces confused me. Who was this old guy? Celebrity? Probably. Never really bothered to keep track of them.

"Well, most people call me the Vongola Ninth," he shrugged.

I burst out laughing.

The principal pushed my head down into a forced bow. "I apologize for her stupidity, Ninth!"

"That's not very nice you know. If it's anyone's fault that I don't know who he is, it's because _your _'school' has never taught me. So the blame actually ends up on you."

"You've got a point there," the 'Ninth' agreed. "Is it so hard to believe that I'm the Ninth boss of the Vongola family?"

"Extremely."

"And your reasoning?"

"There's only one boss of the Vongola family; in a world of six billion people," I pointed out. "I'm sure you can do the math."

He smiled. "Fair point."

"Even if you leave it to people within the mafia, age, origins - the chances are still well beyond single digits. So there is NO way you're the Ninth. Now, excuse me, I have better things to do." I tried to step around him, but once again, he blocked me.

"Do you know what this is?" he mused, drawing a scepter.

_A scepter..._ "Judging by the reactions of these people, you're actually pretty important. I only know of two people with your status that used a scepter. One, would be the Ninth. The other, would be Daemon Spade, the original Guardian of the Mist. Since he's supposedly long dead, you're trying to make me believe you're the Ninth. Not working."

"And if I did...this?" Orange flames lit up on the scepter and the man's forehead.

The edge of my mouth twitched. That was no cheap party trick. _So...I was talking to the real guy...this whole time?! Crap. That was a REALLY bad move then._ Which left me with one option.

"Um...well...isn't nice weather we're having today eh?" I marveled, instantly breaking into a run.

Don't let his looks fool you. The guy was pretty fast for his age. "Serena di Squalo! By the power of the Vongola family, I order you to stop running!"

"Don't think you're any better than me!" I yelled behind me.

"Joining or not is decided by your own will!"

"Ha! But if I don't join, then the Varia and the Vongola are going to hunt me down till me grave – and isn't this proof? The Ninth, chasing a little girl around a school field!" I mocked.

"I call a truce! What if - "

"A truce only works both ways; and there's nothing you have that I want!"

"Money?"

"Screw money!"

"A mansion?"

"Who the hell needs one?"

"I'll kill your brother!"

"If you're the Ninth I've heard about, there's no way you'd sink that low!"

"I'll call my men and they'll kill you for your disrespect!"

"I don't give the shit! I'll talk to you however I damn well please you evil old man!"

The Ninth smiled. A gutsy one huh? Hyper intuition wasn't working too well either... "Fine! How about this: if you're in the top 10 of your grade at the end of the year, I'll let you quit!"

I stopped. Actually I crashed into the fence, but that's not the point. I groaned in pain as the Ninth's shadow cast over my face.

"As the Ninth boss of the Vongola family, I hereby appoint you as an assassin of the Vongola Family's independent assassination squad. Will you serve and honor the Varia to the best of your ability?"

"On your exception that if I do get one of the top ten rankings in my grade at the end of the year, my brother and I get to quit the Varia," I rebutted defiantly.

"Hmm...your brother wasn't included in the deal...how about top ten in the school?" he reconsidered.

"What the - you...you can't be serious right?" I gaped. "There are actually geniuses in this school."

"Top ten in the school, and you can both do as you wish. Last offer."

"Geez...throw in my detention and I'll do it."

"It's a deal then. You've got a mission. Fancy a trip to a hospital?"

"And I suppose if I say no, you'd actually listen to my wishes?"

"I was just trying to be polite. Welcome to the Varia, the dogs of the Vongola."

"Screw you, obnoxious old man."

* * *

><p><em>That following night...<em>

Something punched me in the face. "What the HELL was that -"

Bel pushed a pillow on my face. "Be quiet peasant!"

I sat up and blinked at the artificial lighting. Hospitals...honestly, I hated the person who ever thought of the idea. They were always so...white.

A dress was shoved into my face. "Hurry up and change. We're behind schedule," he hissed, staring at me.

"Um Bel...?"

"What?"

I pointed at him, and then drew a circle in the air.

"What the hell's that meant to mean?"

*Facepalm* "Turn around! Some fucking privacy would be nice!" I exploded silently. Muttering a few curses, he faced the wall.

I should probably explain. Turns out my first mission was with Bel. Oh the cruelty... Anyways, our job was to use a masque as a diversion (sponsored by and in the Estraneo family estate), find a scientist (he'd just created thing thing called a 'possession bullet' or something), kill him, and destroy all his research. Then cover all proof that we'd ever been there and walk away with a million Euros richer.

Security was supposedly extremely tight, so Bel and I pretended to be injured (we didn't actually have to pretend) and we were admitted into the Estraneo children's hospital – which _just _so happened to be above where the party would be held. If by some chance we were caught, the basic idea was to pretend we were lost and we'd just try again. But then again, basic ideas are pretty basic...

"So, no 'Ushi shi shi' today?" I teased, adjusting my necklace so it couldn't be seen.

"It's ~Ushi shi shi _shi_~ you idiot peasant," he insisted back.

"Yeah, whatever. What's with the attitude? You're not holding a grudge against me are you?"

He pushed me into the wall in one of those anime 'girl and guy serious talk' ways. "Look. _You_, are dead weight. You can't even move half your body! If you get in my way, I won't even _hesitate _to leave you behind." He turned and left.

"Nice to know how you feel..." I sighed, following him.

* * *

><p>Things were going smoothly until we reached the third block.<p>

"Sensor just went off!" someone yelled.

"What if it's just a guest?"

"We've got an alert that the Varia could be here tonight! We can't leave anything to spare!"

"Varia? What do they want?"

"Are you stupid? They're after the research lab in the fourth block!" _Fools...they just told us everything we needed to find out._

"You're right...the possession bullet – I heard the Ninth was getting concerned about it..."

Crap. They were coming our way. On instinct, I shoved Bel into the nearest room, straightened my dress and pretended to act confused. _Now...should I kill them, or buy Bel some time? If I kill them, it'll only be a matter of time before someone realizes. But if I distract them..._

"Hands in the air!" one of the two men shouted, gun in my face. I backed up a few steps.

"Hey, be nice Ezio! She's just a kid..." another guy cut in. He bent down in front of me. "Hey little girl, are you lost?"

I nodded. _Ignore the kindergarten voice. Ignore the kindergarten voice. Don't mortally injure him. You can mortally injure him later. _

"She could be a spy! We shouldn't trust her!"

The guy in front of me glared at the other two men. "Honestly, how can you suspect a little kid like her?"

Shit. I risked a glance outside the window and caught something in my peripheral vision. Aha! Problem solved. "I'm the um...pianist for tonight."

"That's right! I heard they were having a kid pianist today. Boss' niece or something right?"

"Huh what? Oh well. Did you see anyone else around here?"

I shook my head.

"Alright. Your performance starts in a few minutes yeah?" I nodded silently, letting out a mental sigh of relief. That was a close call...wait. I was forgetting something...something important...what was it again? Bel! Right. As we walked a few steps, I pick-pocketed an ID card, muttered that I'd left something in that room, and ran back before they could stop me.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...now you've done it," he giggled, back to his normal self.

Well, I didn't have time to worry about his mood swings. "ID card. Don't make too much of a mess." I prepared to open the door to repeat another lie.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I hate to tell you, but you _do _have three broken fingers. I don't see how you're ever going to be able to play the piano," he reminded.

"Worry about yourself first dude."

"Rendezvous in seven," he decided, shoving me out the door. "I'll find you."

I sighed, running out to the waiting security guards. Bel did have a point though. So...how do you play a piano with broken fingers?

Next thing I knew, I was on a stage – right in front of a piano. _Blanked out again...geez, what was wrong with me these days?_

An announcer walked up to the podium, signalling me to sit down at the piano. "And to entertain us tonight, the Boss' niece!"

I couldn't even move most of my fingers. You've. Got. To. Be. Kidding. Me. _God, please let Dino's 'fate' bullshit be on my side just this once...whoops. I forgot. I'm an atheist._

I pressed a single key.

* * *

><p><em>In the Cavallone Mansion...<em>

"Dino, I'm relying on you...for the Cavallone..." the Ninth gen boss choked out.

Dino sighed, grabbing his father's hand a little tighter. "Please don't say that; I've told you, I won't take the family."

"Dino..."

He couldn't take it any longer. Hiding his tears, he ran out of the room, bumping into Romario.

"Young Master!" Romario face palmed as Dino fell down the stairs. He looked back into the room where his boss lay. "Boss...I'm sorry to say it, but are you sure about this?"

Dino's father smiled. "It's fine. Someday, Dino will become a great boss."

"But-"

"I called him."

Romario gaped.

* * *

><p><em>In the garden...<em>

_I knew this would happen. He's left me alone for two weeks now. I bet you he let me go to mafia land as a bribe..._Dino lay out spread eagled on the grass. _What would Serena do? Hm...I think she would talk to herself out loud._ "I've already told the old man I don't want to do it. I wish he'd just listen..." Dino sighed to himself again. Suddenly, a shadow cast over his eyes.

It was a baby. Wearing a fedora hat. And an expensive suit.

WHAT THE FUCK?

It smirked an evil smirk. "I'm the home tutor, hitman Reborn. I'll make you into a great boss Dino Cavallone."

"Reborn...?"

* * *

><p><strong>If there's anything you don't get, or an error that you can't bear to see, please PM or review.<strong>

**Have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	12. Strange Fuzzy Feelings

**Oh and before I forget, a big thank you to all reviewers, story alerters and favouriteers to this point. Your effort is much appreciated :D**

**Btw, this is a possibly disturbing one-off chapter. You have been warned.**

**Please enjoy :]**

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 12 - Strange Fuzzy Feelings<br>

_In the Varia Command Centre..._

Squalo muttered curses under his breath. Waiting wasn't in his repertoire. Four hours had passed since Serena and Bel should've started their assault, and yet...the best hackers in the world couldn't even find where they were.

Suddenly, the phone in his pocket started ringing. And who was it? Levi. Of all people, _Levi_. Who was standing _right next to him_.

"VOI! Levi! You fucking idiot, I'm standing right next to you! What the hell is wrong with you?" Squalo complained loudly, shoving his cell phone in the other man's face.

"Why the hell would I call you?" Levi shot back indignantly, showing empty palms.

Rolling his eyes, Squalo flipped it open. "Voi, you cunt, if you ever prank call me again, I swear I'll - "

"_Squalo...that's uh...nice. I just wanted to say hello. I'll hang up then."_

"Serena? Wait! What the – where are – how the - ?" Squalo choked out, slowing crushing the phone. Unable to control his strength, he placed the mobile phone on top of a table with the volume on full.

"_You see, Levi was pissing me off with his stupid threats, so I stole his phone. Don't tell him – I want to see his expression when I chuck it in a toilet...*sniggers*..."_

"You punk!" Levi growled. "I'll kill you!"

"_...Seriously, Squalo? Can't a girl have a nice PRIVATE heart to heart with her awesome brother every now and then?"_

"VOI! What the hell is going on with your mission?"

"Y_ou're no fun today. Hmmm...go watch some T.V . Channel 4 should have the news on at the moment."_

"Is now honestly the best time?!" Squalo yelled at the phone.

"_Nah! I'm just kidding. I need you to wear a tutu and start pole dancing!" _Her voice was dripping with sarcasm. _"And then after that, let's visit a bar, get high on drugs, go to a bridge club, blow up the leaning tower of pisa and shove a firework up someone's ass!"_ Her tone changed._ "I'm serious. Channel 4." _Someone screamed, and the line went dead.

VOI! Get me channel 4!"

* * *

><p><em>Four hours ago...<em>

As the audience clapped and cheered, I stood up and bowed. To be honest, I didn't actually play the piano. It played itself. All I had to do was press one note and _pretend _to play it as its keys pushed up and down automatically. I guess the Estraneo's boss' niece was just a show off.

"What an amazing performance!"

I turned to leave, but of course, something went wrong.

"Eh? Who's that girl?" a girl who'd just entered the hall whined loudly. "Uncle, you said I was going to play!" So this must be the real niece...

I felt pissed.

I didn't have much of a reason to, but I couldn't help it. She just reminded me so much of every single annoying girl in my class – constantly fantasizing about boys, show off-y and try-hard-wanna-be-ish. "You, my dear little friend, are a DISGRACE to the piano." To prove my point, I pressed a key, and the piano started playing itself again. The audience gasped. "You call this 'playing' the piano? Shame on YOU, shame on your FAMILY, and shame on every person who knows you can't play the piano! (which was probably the majority of the Estraneo family)"

*awkward silence*

Immediately, I clasped a hand on my mouth. _Oh fuck...I just gave my shame speech to the Estraneo family..._

"Get that girl out of here!" the niece bawled. A crying fourteen-ish year old girl is not a very nice sight (the eye-liner didn't help).

I glanced at my watch. Six minutes had passed since Bel and I went our separate ways. Now...I just had to keep talking for another minute. "Who the hell do you think you are? Queen of the world? Well then, I hope life chews you up and spits you out into a trash can."

"Shut up!"

_All right. Time to go impromptu..._ Urgh. What happened in that last drama show Lussuria watched? "You're telling me to shut up? I know you're that whore who took my brother's virginity! I have NOTHING to say to you!"

"She's lying! Uncle! Get that crazy bitch out of here!"

"Well then, if you EVER come back to my house at midnight again, I'll fucking kill you! Take back your stupid blackmail letters! He's not the father of your bastard child!" I screeched, getting worked up. This was actually pretty fun...

"Is this true Angela?" an elderly man muttered sternly at his niece.

"No! I don't know what's she's talking about!" 'Angela' stuttered back. "I swear! I'm a virgin!"

"You know EXACTLY what I'm talking about!"

"That's it! Who the hell are you?"

I'd always hated being the centre of attention... "Me? I'm the person who watched my brother get violated by you!"

"Guards!"

_Damn. Curse the person who made dead ends exist..._

The next few events were actually pretty surprising. And that's saying something, considering my crazy life.

1. The ceiling exploded.  
>2. Bel crashed in through the window.<br>3. He actually said 'wassup'.  
>4. The boss of the Estraneo family crapped his pants, and a chandelier fell on him.<p>

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...what an innocent mind you have," Bel put in, snapping me out of my shock.

"Oh shut up. Mission accomplished?" I questioned.

"What-his-name's dead, but...there are actually three labs. Only two are active, so we gotta destroy another one before they figure out that we're after it," he concluded quickly, making his way towards another window.

"So...you actually have a plan? Care to share?" I speculated.

"Get out of here and destroy the second lab."

"...Well. That is...so...explanatory..." I responded. "Do you have any idea _where _the second lab is?"

"..."

Maybe he was going to answer. Maybe he wasn't. In the confusion around us, gas jetted out from the most random places – the piano, the ceiling, the chairs...a few seconds and Bel hit the floor. So did the majority of the people in the room. _Sleeping gas. It doesn't seem to work on me..._

"They're there!" a voice called through the mist. Men with guns and gas masks ran into the room from the doors and windows, guns all pointed at me. Bel didn't twitch, but I could see him breathing.

"Don't move!" a commanding voice ordered.

Straightening up, I brushed myself off. _Damn...what should I do?_ I could just leave. Go home. Forget this ever happened.

_Leave him there._ That's what my gut, body and heart was telling me. Save him, or attempt to, and we'd both probably just end up caught or dead. But I couldn't leave him there...I mean...I wanted to. He wasn't a very nice person, he'd tried to kill be more than once and plus: he was annoying. Even if I did help him, I highly doubted he'd say thank you or anything. Fuck...

"Don't move, or we'll fire!" they threatened.

I considered. Then I stepped forward.

* * *

><p><em>Back into present time...<em>

"Sir, channel 4 is on the main screen!" a techie called out.

A news logo flashed as a reporter in a helicopter began to speak. _'Today, the mafia seems to show its true colours. One of the most wanted mafia families, the Estraneo family, is in flames and is currently in battle with police." _The scene cut to the events, and Squalo's jaw dropped. _Why the hell...is Serena waving on TV?_

* * *

><p><em>Approximately four hours ago...<em>

I dragged Bel by his legs and shoved him into a white van – I'd seen a few men talk about alerting a research lab and hoped for luck. Actually, I'd been pretty lucky in the room with the piano; I found a trapdoor (all right, I fell in. But it's the result that counts right?).

A news camera was flashed in my direction. _AWESOME! I've always wanted a lame claim to fame..._ I waved ecstatically as the van's engine started, hopped in, and closed the doors.

* * *

><p><em>Present time...<em>

The shot changed onto a highway chase, following a white van. Squalo found he had difficulty unclenching his fist.

* * *

><p><em>Three hours, thirty minutes ago...<em>

"Fuck!" I swore as the van hit another pothole. I was trying to change into a pair of white overalls (it seemed less suspicious than a party dress) but I wasn't having much luck. I'd already put it on four times – inside-out, backwards...

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...your legs are going through the armholes dumbass," Bel snickered.

I stood up too quickly, and hit my head on the roof of the van as we hit another pothole.

"Dumbass," he snickered again.

"Pervert," I shot back.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you're the dumbass who started strippi - "

I threw a pair of overalls in his face. "Next time, I'll remember to leave you to die."

"So what's the plan, dumbass?"

"Is that my new nickname? You really couldn't think of anything more offensive?" I grumbled. "I found us a ride to the second lab. Though we might have to ditch this van soon though..."

"Huh? Why?"

*Through megaphone* "This is the police! Stop the van!"

I heard Bel's zip go up, and finally got mine right. "...Still need me to explain?"

* * *

><p><em>Present time...<em>

Squalo covered his eyes with his hand, peeking. This was just getting worse and worse...

'_There were four people in the van, police have only been able to catch two. The other two have been labelled extremely dangerous.'_ Two people dressed in white overalls jumped out of the van and into the bushes as it swerved on burst tyres.

The helicopter attempted to follow them, but one of them threw something at the helicopter, and the camera fell to the ground. The other of the pair walked towards the camera, flipped off then left.

Squalo finally managed to open his hand, and shakily redialled.

"_Hello, you've reached the voicemail of Serena - no wait, Levi whatever-his-last-name-is. If you would like to - "_

Everything that Squalo had planned to say had been instantly forgotten. "VOI! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? WAVING ON NATIONAL TELEVISION? DO YOU WANT THE WORLD TO HUNT YOU DOWN AND - "

She hung up.

He redialled, prepared to apologize. His preparations didn't click with his mouth. "DO YOU HAVE A DEATH WISH? ARE YOU INSANE? WHAT THE - "

She hung up.

Squalo twitched, and all people within a ten feet radius moved further away. His cell suddenly rang.

_"Good evening, this is Pizza Hut. Superbi Squalo, we would like to inform you that your credit card transaction has been approved. Your pizzas - "_

In frustration, he dropped his cell onto the ground, and put it out of its misery.

One of the techies to his left received a call, and hesitantly looked in his direction. "Sir..."

"Put it on speaker," Squalo sighed.

_"Well, you sounded like you needed a pizza party. Anyways, w__e're at the Estraneo family's second laboratory. 37°19′N 13°35′E. Requesting an emergency pickup in half an hour."_

"Granted."

* * *

><p>I hung up with a sigh. "So, Bel, how are you going?"<p>

"Fine," he muttered back in reply, fiddling with the gas lines near the back of the room. The pounding on the locked door and voices outside sounded frantic. "Oi dumbass, go deal with them."

"Them? As in the mini-army? Pfft, go fuck yourself. They'll get tired soon. What are you setting the timer to?"

"52 minutes from...now." There was a slight beep, and in a split-second, Bel was beside me. "We should go."

"Huh? We've got 52 minutes. What's the rush?" I reminded, yawning.

"It was upside down."

"Upside...?" I froze, realizing with horror what he meant, slowly turning to the timer. Twenty _seconds_ remaining? "Can you turn it off?"

"Not enough time."

"...So Prince Belphegor, who's the dumbass now?"

* * *

><p><em>Approximately an hour later...<em>

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...dare to say that again?" Bel warned, knives glinting in the moonlight.

"I'd dare to say it a hundred times: I bet you only have one eye," I acknowledged, lazed on my back with a cap covering my face.

"Just because you can't see my eyes, doesn't mean I only have one!" Bel shot back angrily.

"Well then, you tell me. How the hell do you set a bomb without realizing it's _upside down_?" I emphasized. "I mean, if I made that mistake – it's alright coz I'm a klutz and all – but you? The 'high' and 'mighty' prince the ripper? Therefore, I rest my case. You must only have one eye."

"That's illogical you dumbass peasant," Bel shot back. "Accidents happen. And you'd make a crappy lawyer."

"Lawyers are only 1.3 times more likely to suicide than the average person, and that's just a bit too low for me...you know?"

He obviously didn't know.

I sat up eagerly and pulled the cap back onto my head. "How about this. Show me your eyes, and then I'll believe you have two eyes and that you're not a cyclops."

"No."

"Come on! Why not? It doesn't have anything to do with your whole 'prince obsession' right?"

"It has _everything _to do with my prince obsessi – it's not an obsession! I am a prince!" Bel asserted, catching himself just in time.

"Yeah, totally. But I don't get it – if you're really royalty, you're country's just fine with you becoming a Varia officer?"

"It's fine with it."

I scratched my head, clueless. "So...you're the sole heir to an entire country...and yet you're a relatively well known assassin...?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...stupid peasant. I wasn't the sole heir – I did have a twin brother for a while."

"For a while?"

"He died."

"Eh? If you don't mind me asking, how exactly?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...a stabbing. Assassination."

"Woah! How ironic. That must be tough. Did they ever catch the killer? When did he die? Were you two close?"

Bel harrumphed. "How thick are you? The killer's standing right in front of you dumbass! _I _stabbed him to death. _I _buried him in the dirt. _I_ peed on his grave."

_Peed on his grave? WTF? _"...So you weren't um...*cough*...close. And the...uh...rest of your family was also...okay with this?"

"Dunno, I killed them all too."

"Well um, I'm just...a little curious, but do tell me - what country exactly is this?"

"So many questions...why exactly do I have to answer you?"

"Because I saved your ass _twice _today."

"I saved your ass twice. That makes us even."

"You saved my ass _once_. So technically I did one more ass saving than you – therefore you still owe me one. Show me your eyes."

"Tch. Never. My eyes are unique, and the UN would have a field day if they knew what country I'm from."

"United Nations? But if you're not going to show me, I'm just going to have to assume you're a one-eyed prince."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I couldn't care less about what you think, dumbass."

What Bel and I_ didn't_ know at the time, was that our actions against the Estraneo family that night was the trigger for the third research lab to be secretly reopened. Experimentation for a new bio-weapon began.

Human experimentation.

* * *

><p><em>The following morning...<em>

"I'm sorry. I'm not sure I heard you right, Lawson," I decided, putting a hand on my ear.

"You heard me just fine – two weeks rehabilitation," he decided, writing a medical report of some sort.

"Can't we negotiate? I'm falling behind in school! And uh...I wanted to play a piano in my room...and uh...I have someone I wanted to visit...and um..."

"Out of excuses yet? I've talked to you school; they've sent you your homework over – and you won't be playing the piano any time soon, Serena. You heal fast and clean, but don't push your luck. No negotiating," he finished while taking a sip of coffee.

"Come on – these aren't even severe injuries right? I mean, I'll be fine in a few days."

He raised an eyebrow, flipped to a page on his report and cleared his throat unnecessarily. "Damage report for Serena di Squalo. Three broken fingers, two cracked ribs, post-concussion, sprained ankle, second degree burns, badly dislocated shoulder and numerous cuts, bruises and grazes. Estimated physical recovery time: six weeks. Full psychological recovery: sixteen months. Would you like me to continue?" Lawson questioned.

"No doctor, that won't be necessary," Squalo broke in, announcing his entrance and leaning on the door. "A fortnight sounds too short now that I hear the full list."

I sunk lower in my bed, staring at the ceiling. I knew he was pissed at me – in truth he had every right to be. An easy in-out mission, had (through no fault of my own, I swear) turned into a national manhunt and two explosions in the same city in one night. And on top of that, I'd come out with a truckload of injuries again.

"Serena," he called, trying to get my attention. "SERENA!"

"Oh hello." I muttered.

"VOI! Don't play dumb with me! You're grounded. If you even _step_ outside the Varia grounds in these two weeks, I swear I'll - "

"Chop off my arm? Yell at me? I'm sorry. It won't happen again. How many times do you want me to say it?" I murmured in retaliation. I must've sounded really sincere or something, because he dropped the glare, sighed, turned on his heel and marched off. "You're still grounded!" he yelled from the hallway.

I pulled up my knees and buried my face. Squalo wasn't the 'you're grounded!' type. It was almost as if the Varia was pulling us apart.

Lawson put a hand on my head. "You shouldn't take it to heart; he can't stand watching you get hurt," he tried to theorize. "A lot of people care about you Serena – the crazy stunt you pulled yesterday made a lot of people look at the Varia differently. Ruthless, dangerous, efficient but flashy and proud to be."

"God damn it, I can't let this end like this," I grumbled, getting out of bed. "Sorry Lawson, I have a conversation to make."

* * *

><p>Squalo strolled into the command centre yet again. The Varia's call line had been going haywire; and in his point of view, the Varia was completely disorganized – they didn't do their homework, bad teamwork, and no back-up plans. In Squalo's book, that was completely unacceptable. Efficiency was almost his middle name (fortunately his parents decided middle names were for losers).<p>

As he entered the room, he heard laughter. "Urgh...I take _one_ break, and these idiots are probably watching porn or something..." he muttered to himself. "VOI! What're you all giggling at? Has Lussuria finished his mission yet?"

"We're sorry Sir!" a few men chorused, snapping to a salute. "Mission accomplished! He's on his way to pick-up, no signs of trouble."

"What the fuck are you watching?" he growled.

"Surveillance tapes from the Estraneo mission...?"

"Oh did you now? Show me what's so funny then."

"Um...are you sure you want to watch this Sir...?"

"Wouldn't want to miss a second," Squalo requested, pulling up a chair.

"_What an amazing performance!"_

_Centre stage. Excellent, that's a great low profile! _"Fucking damn it."

"Uh...apparently they got held up, so she pretended to be the pianist," someone stuttered.

Another girl entered the hall_. "Eh? Who's that girl? Uncle, you said I was going to play!"_

The Serena in the video started fuming_. "You, my dear little friend, are a DISGRACE to all piano's on this planet." _She pressed a key, and the piano started playing itself again. The audience gasped_. "You call this 'playing' the piano? Shame on YOU, shame on your FAMILY, and shame on EVERY person who knows you can't play the piano!"_

*awkward silence*

The tech crew started cracking up again. Squalo just face palmed.

"_Get that girl out of here!"_

Serena glanced at her watch._ "Who the hell do you think you are? Queen of the world? Well then, I hope life chews you up and spits you out into a trash can."_

"You know, that niece _is _pretty hot."

"_Shut up!"_

"Total bitch dude. She may be hot, but inside, she is ug-ly!"

"VOI! Do you mind? Discuss girls off duty!"

"_- telling me to shut up? I know you're that whore who took my brother's virginity! I have NOTHING to say to you!" _she yelled.

Squalo didn't how he should feel. He couldn't even close his mouth. The others in the room cowered a little in their seats, trying not to laugh.

"_She's lying! Uncle! Get that crazy bitch out of here!"_

"_Well then, if you EVER come back to my house at midnight again, I'll fucking kill you! Take back your stupid blackmail letters! He's not the father of your bastard child!"_

What the hell.

"_Is this true Angela?" _an elderly man muttered sternly at his niece.

"_No! I – I – I don't know what's she's talking about! I swear! I'm a virgin!"_

Serena looked deadly serious. "_You know EXACTLY what I'm talking about!"_

"_That's it! Who the hell are you?"_

"_Me? I'm the person who watched my brother get violated by you!"_

"_Guards!"_

Suddenly, the ceiling exploded. Bel crashed in through the window. A chandelier fell on the Estraneo boss, and he crapped his pants.

"Classic!" the techies high fived. "We've gotta put that up onto YouTube!"

Squalo's eye twitched. "Nothing's going onto YouTube!"

"Party-pooper."

"What did you say?"

"Nothing Sir!"

There was static. "That's all we could salvage, Sir."

Squalo snapped out of his shock. "Is there actually a third lab?"

"We checked it out, but it's just like Belphegor said. It was shut down years ago because of too many failed experiments – it was only operational for a few weeks in all."

"That's it? There's no more data?"

"I was wondering the same thing, Superbi Squalo," the Ninth called out from the door. _How the hell does he do that? That's twice he's sneaked up on me without me knowing... _"The Estraneo family keeps many secrets. I suspect only the high ups know about its existence at all."

"What brings you here Ninth?" _  
><em>

"Promotion. As the Ninth boss of the Vongola family, I hereby name you Strategy Captain of the Varia. Congratulations," the old man shrugged.

"Strategy Captain?"

"Which makes you the highest ranking officer in the Varia. The next boss of the Varia is yours to choose. Of course, you could always pick yourself," the Ninth added.

Suddenly, Serena's voice echoed down the hall into the room. "SQUALO! I HAVE AN EPIPHANY!"

* * *

><p>I ran into the room, so excited that I didn't even realize someone was standing at the door. "Squalo! I've got this epic new idea for your arm! What if - " I stopped. His expression was one of such shock that I was worried I'd said something that offended him. "Um Squalo? You're kinda freaking me out...could you stop the whole face twitching thing?"<p>

"You're grounded. Forever."

"F-Forever?" One of the techies behind Squalo signaled to me. 'Estraneo rant!' he mouthed. Estraneo rant? OH. "Geez Squalo! I was buying time!"

"Well say something else next time!" he argued back. "And Serena, you can't just interrupt the Ninth and walk past him without acknowledging him!"

"What?"

"The Vongola Ninth!"

"Pfft. I never liked that old coot anyway..." I grumbled, folding my arms.

"He's still here!" Squalo hissed frantically pointing at the door.

"Is there something wrong?" an amused voice called out from the door. Oops. "Now, as I was saying, you have a week before you make your decision, Strategy Captain. Chinese New Year's coming up – why don't you all go do something nice? One week!" he called behind his shoulder as he left.

"So...Strategy Captain Squalo eh?" I mused, playing with the words.

"Manners Serena; not every mafia guy is as nice as him," Squalo sighed.

"He's an evil old man whichever way you look at it."

"Yeah, but don't say it to his face..."

"If I don't say it to his face, I'd be technically backstabbing him right?"

"That's true but you can't just... just forget it. There's just no point in arguing with you. Voi, why aren't you resting?"

"Coz...I was like...uh...you know...the thing...like..."

Squalo facepalmed. "Epiphany?"

"YES. You should totally get a fake hand! And coz you're ambidextrous, you can you can tape a sword to your fake hand and go 'VOI!' a lot – and no one will ever know that you're missing your left arm!"

"VOI! I do not go 'VOI!' a lot!" Squalo rebutted.

"You just said 'VOI!' twice in one sentence," I pointed out.

"VO - "

"Thrice."

"Fine. So I do say 'VOI!' a lot. But you're idea, is weird. How am I supposed to shower or eat with a sword? What if I go to a party?" Squalo listed. "It's not like you can just walk around with a sword attached to your arm."

"That's the genius of it all! It's attached to your fake hand – so you can take it on and off whenever you please. And plus; you always hear teachers going 'a sword should be an extension to your own body' and crap like that right?"

"For the last time: _it is not literal_. But if it's so easy to take off, then it'll probably just fall off during battle."

"Not if you use duct tape."

"Duct ta- really? Duct tape? You want me to use a fake hand and stick a sword on with duct tape?"

"What's wrong Squalo? It sounds like a great idea!" Lussuria called while entering the room.

"I think it's a stupid idea..." Levi grumbled. "People are gonna laugh at you if trying to kill them like that."

"It's so ridiculous, that I'm actually agreeing with Levi," Squalo replied.

"People aren't going to hire a person who can only kill with one hand," Mammon droned. "Serena's got a point – just try it, then complain afterwards."

"VOI! I am not complaining!"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...it's always so loud around here," Bel giggled, hands leaning casually on the back of his head. "Did you know that Squalo robbed a girl of her virginity?"

"Oh Squalo, you're such a dirty boy!" Lussuria trilled.

"And you call me a pervert..." Levi grumbled.

"What the – VOI! FOR THE LAST TIME, I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT! Right, Serena?"

At that moment I felt pissed that Squalo was being so...stubborn. "Huh?" I asked, playing innocent.

"VOI! DON'T PRETEND YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS!"

"Know about what? This is all news to me. So tell me. How many girls like Angela are there? One? Five? A hundred?"

"VOOOOOOOIIIIII!"

* * *

><p><em>A week later...<em>

"I can't believe I stayed up till six sorting out those stupid files..." Squalo groaned, rubbing his head, still in his pyjamas. The Varia was at the breakfast table, having a weekly brunch. No one bothered to dress in their uniform; it was a rare day off after all.

"That's promotion for you, Strategy Captain Squalo," Mammon murmured, counting his wages. "Chinese New Year's always the most unproductive day of the year..."

"I can't believe I overslept again! I thought I would never get that facemask off..." Lussuria whined.

"What're you all complaining about? You only just got up! I was up hours ago!" Levi declared.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...but you went to sleep before Mammon, pervert."

"I am not a pervert!" Levi growled back.

Bel smirked. "You can argue all you like, but I saw - "

Squalo did not want to hear about the disturbing life of Levi. "VOI! Levi's personal life is not to be discussed at brunch! Now that you mention it, where's Serena?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...she was still in her room when I came down..."

"It's almost midday. It's shameful not to wake up in the morning", Levi grumbled.

"All of us are free today right?" Lussuria questioned, an idea popping into his head.

"Hang on," Squalo recalled with a groan, "I've got to attend a stupid party tonight."

"All right! Let's go wake up Serena together!" Lussuria decided.

"Forget it..." Squalo concluded. "Serena was never really a morning person. If you want to try waking her up, go at your own risk."

"Come on, it'll be fun! How about this – whoever wins, get's to decide the Varia's Chinese New Year! If I win, we're going to play truth or dare love version till midnight!" Lussuria decided.

Instantly, they were all awake. "You can't be referring to that stupid rule that the Ninth made before most of us were born...right?" Squalo gasped.

"I am referring to that – so whoever gets Serena out of bed first wins," Lussuria announced.

"I'm going first!" Levi declared, running up the stairs.

"No you don't!" Lussuria argued, following suit. "Last time you won, we all went to a strip club with only women!"

"VOI! Hell if I'm going to a strip club!" Squalo growled, jumping up. "We're going to go have tests of courage if I win!"

"Tch. What's the fun in that? If I win, we're all going to go shopping!" Bel insisted.

"If I win, we're going to play monopoly with real cash..." Mammon mused, floating after Bel.

* * *

><p>Stupid nightmare. Apparently sleeping in the morning does not cure nightmares. Nor does utter exhaustion. Oh well, it was worth a try...but that weird guy with the different coloured eyes was pretty good looking. And just a tad bit insane. And that weird laugh – 'ku fu fu fu' – he was like the second coming of Bel. Weird dreams...<p>

* * *

><p>"Hey brat! Get up already! Stop disgracing the Varia!" Levi ordered, banging on the door.<p>

Lussuria finally got up the stairs. "Levi! Stop that - you'll break the door!"

The door's hinges gave way.

* * *

><p>In my dream, I suddenly felt very vulnerable. Looking down, I was still wearing clothes. I still had a sword. Mukuro was still going 'ku fu fu fu' like some psychotic manic. How very odd...<p>

* * *

><p>"I knew she was lying when she said she slept she was dead..." Squalo murmured to himself as the Varia crowded around his sister's bed.<p>

"So this is what a nightmare is like..." Bel murmured, poking her face. "Hey Mammon – can't you read mind's or something? ~Ushi shi shi shi~...I wonder what dumbass is afraid of..."

"That's a waste of time. I can't read her mind," Mammon replied flatly. "The security of her mind is state of the art – unlike others..." *stares at Levi*

"Should we wake her up?" Lussuria considered. "Isn't that what you're meant to do if a kid has a nightmare?"

Squalo shrugged and sat down at her desk. "If you wake her up, she's just going to get a bunch of headaches. And plus – her subconscious is pretty violent most of the time..." Carefully, he inspected some documents on her desk – aha – an unfinished English essay. Technically as her guardian, he had to make sure that she was doing alright in her studies right?

_Half Year English Report Serena di Squalo_

_My Family_

_There's not much I can say about my family. Partially because I don't have much family to talk about._

Levi flew out the door.

"VOI! What did I tell you about her subconscious reflexes?" Squalo shouted to Levi. "Keep it down!"

_My grandparents are long dead – they were murdered by enemies of my parents. On the other hand – my aunt died in a car accident that wasn't actually an accident. And my parents themselves were murdered recently. Odd how their deaths are all somehow mafia related though...must be unhealthy._

Lussuria crashed into a wall.

_So I suppose the only family I have left is my brother, Superbi Squalo._

Mammon decided to turn on the television.

_There's not much I can say about him, either. He's a guy. He's ambidextrous. He likes to go 'VOI!' a lot. He's not one of the best role models in the universe. Yet he's a great brother. Weird huh? Lately...I feel like we're falling apart. There's nothing I can do, but...I don't want him to go._

* * *

><p>I was drowning. <em>Just a dream, just a dream...<em>I chanted to myself. When I opened my eyes, I found myself on the floor. My Varia bedroom floor. I felt cold. And drenched. Tilting my head up a little, and stared blankly at a few faces. Mammon. Bel. Levi. Lussuria. Squalo. My eyes reverted back to Bel, who happened to be holding a dripping bucket and doing one of his freaky laughs.

Oh that son of a...

And so, Bel won the challenge. Which meant the Varia (including me, grounded or not apparently) was going to have to go shopping.

* * *

><p><em>Twenty minutes later...<em>

I yawned. "You know, I really don't get it. What does the Chinese New Year have to do with anything?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...what's there to get? It's the new year," Bel retorted knowingly.

"Yeah. Except if you haven't forgotten, it's _Chinese _New Year. We're Italian," I pointed out.

"Chinese New Year is simply the most uneventful day in the mafia calendar..." Mammon piped up. "Security goes up tenfold around the year because of iilegal Chinese fireworks; so there's not much point in trying to smuggle something. Assassination's no good either; every mafia family throws a massive party. It's too annoying to point the right fingers."

"I thought Chinese New Year was a fifteen day celebration."

"Correction: the first day is the New Year; the other 14 days are full of non-stop partying."

"That's completely illogical."

"Yeah well, tell that to the Chinese. All the staff's on a holiday – which is why we're taking a taxi," Squalo finished, readjusting a fake hand.

"Okay...I get the taxi bit – but explain this to me. You've got the shotgun seat, Levi's and Lussuria got the window seats, Mammon's sitting on Bel in the middle seat, but I'm on the floor...?"

"Blame yourself for being the midget. And keep your head down, there's a police car coming up," Levi growled, shoving my face back onto the floor.

Ouch. Who knew the Varia was so cheap.

"It's called saving money," Mammon interjected, reading my facial expression.

* * *

><p>Once we arrived, Lussuria wanted to drag me around looking at clothes. 'I've always waited for the day the Varia had a girl I could dress up!' he had said. Ironically, this was coming from the man that tried to kill me just a little over a week ago...<p>

As I was being dragged off, I managed to get an arm on Squalo's sleeve. "For the love of god, please don't make me go shopping with Lussuria..." I pleaded.

I tried using puppy eyes at Squalo.

It failed.

"Consider this payment for 'Angela'," he smirked at me.

"And here I was, thinking you were nice..." I muttered dejectedly. "But can you do me a favor? Get me some underwear. And casual clothes. Few caps. Oh, and silver aviators!" I called as Lussuria jerked me away.

* * *

><p><em>A few stores later...<em>

Lussuria was starting to lose hope. "How about this one? It looks cute!"

"Don't like flowers."

Don't like sequins. Don't like frills. Too bright. Too pink. Ugly green. Hate tights. Hate see through materials. Itchy.

Lussuria searched another rack. "Oh! And this one?"

"Lussuria, I don't even _have_ boobs," I sighed quietly, hoping other shoppers wouldn't notice a flamboyant guy holding ridiculous clothes.

Eventually, we decided to have a lunch break.

Lussuria sat down with a cup of coffee, and put it in front of me. "Alright, so what do you like Serena?"

I sighed (yet again). "Lussuria, I know you're trying, but I honestly don't care I have no sense of fashion."

"Why? They do say – clothes make the man," he pointed out.

"Why do people wear clothes in the first place? To cover up. To stay warm. Fashion is just a waste of money; a way for the mafia to make some extra cash." With that, I stood up, picked up my bag and walked away.

A pang of guilt struck through me, but I brushed it off. He reminded me of my Mom. Peeking over the railing, I saw a range of flashing lights. _Hm...I've always wanted to try arcade games..._

* * *

><p><em>Meanwhile, elsewhere in the shopping centre...<em>

Taking another sip of his energy drink, Squalo eyed the shop in front of him carefully. 'Bra's N Things New Year Sale!' the sign on the door read. Had Serena not asked, he would've never come within such close range. Inside, it was filled with at least a hundred teenage girls, pushing and shoving to grab the best deals. There wasn't a single man in sight. _I wonder if they have kids sizes too..._

But Serena had said '_**can**_ you do me a favor?'. He could always say no. But he remembered the final line in her essay - _I don't want him to go... _– so _if_ he did a few favors, they'd feel closer. Or that's how he hoped it would turn out.

All of a sudden, he was angry. He was a prodigy. He was a highly skilled assassin. This was nothing! Just a walk in the park. Standing up from the bench, he crumpled the can, threw it in the trash can and marched towards the store.

Gently shoving his way to the back, he found some relatively plain looking underwear. Just an easy in-out mission. As he picked a few up, he rubbed his fingers on the material. _Seems legit_.

"You know that's for a girl right? There aren't any guy clothes in this store," a girl about his age lectured him as she flipped through the pile.

Squalo involuntarily blushed. "Um...no – it's not for me...it's for - "

"There's no way your girlfriend can be happy wearing something boring like that!" the girl chided, cutting him off. Without warning, she dragged him to a table with more... *cough* exotic undergarments. "I'm sure these work better."

Girls started looking in his direction.

"Um...I think you've uh...misunderstood; it's for my sister..." Squalo choked out, inching slowly away.

The girl gasped with a smile. "Incest? Wow, you're full of surprises aren't you?" she crowed, advancing towards him.

More girls started to look into his direction.

"N -no...you're getting this wrong..." he stuttered as she backed him to a wall.

"Oh my god he's so cute!" a girl whispered dreamily.

"I think he works out..." another giggled.

"I wish my boyfriend was like him..."

That was the last straw. Squalo had every intention of assassinating/murdering every single person in the room, but unfortunately, one of the oldest and noblest of mafia traditions was to respect women.

"VOI! That's such a hot guy!" he exclaimed pointing at the roof, making a run for it as the girls heads all turned. They even chased him until he managed to run into the closing doors of an elevator.

Busy with his thoughts, Squalo didn't notice Bel and Mammon restraining their laughter in the crowded elevator.

* * *

><p><em>Later that day...<em>

"VOI! Serena, you're late," Squalo grumbled as I sat down at the café table. "I've still got something on, so hurry up and order something."

"Sorry, sorry...you want an iPod? I thought you might like the silver one," I decided out of the blue, tossing over a box.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...wasting your money on technology?" Bel pondered. "What's in the suitcase? More crap?" he pointed, curious.

"You could say that..." I muttered. "I've got two more iPod's, two cameras, a PS2 console, seven giftcards, a voucher for a limousine ride and a stuffed teddy," I shrugged casually.

Squalo facepalmed. "How much money did you waste? Two thousand? Three?"

"Nine," I replied, chewing on a bread roll. "Well ten if you count the suitcase."

"Ten thousand dollars?" Mammon mused. "That's not very bright."

"Not ten thousand," I said quickly, sipping on a chocolate milkshake.

"Ten hundred?" Levi questioned.

"Nope."

"Ten tens?"

"Then I would just say a hundred doofus."

"VOI! Then how much did you spend?" Squalo barked.

"Geez, someone's in a bad mood today," I grumbled. "Ten. Just ten Euros."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...since dumbass is lying, I'm guessing you wasted quite a lot of money..." Bel smirked.

"Nope. I went to the arcade, bought nine tokens, played coin dozer for a bit, got 'bout a hundred coins, then won some prizes. The suitcase was from a charity store. Do you want the teddy bear?" I offered.

Mammon leaned forward, fingers interlocked. "I'm willing to make a deal with you Serena. If you - "

"VOI! No deals! I thought you were shopping with Lussuria?"

"Don't like shopping."

Lussuria sighed.

"Tch. Here are your clothes," Squalo acknowledged, handing over a filled bag. Taking a quick glance, my mouth dropped.

"Hey Squalo?"

"Hm?"

"You do...uh...remember that I'm your uh..._sister_?"

* * *

><p><em>*flashback*<em>

_Squalo browsed slowly through the racks of kids clothes. It was still pretty cold, so he figured that he should buy a few long sleeve shirts. He didn't really know what Serena liked (she was too picky), but he found a simple blue shirt. Would it fit? He picked it off the rack and lifted it onto himself, staring at the length. Serena was really short – and skinny, so this would probably be too baggy..._

_As his thoughts dwelled into questions on whether his sister would be a midget, two boys ran playfully around. By the time he shook out of his stupor, they'd already seen him with a girl's shirt in his hands._

"_Huh? Hey mister, are you gay?" one of them asked innocently._

"_Don't be stupid. Gay's don't wear girl clothes. He's clearly a transvestite," the other pointed out._

_Squalo's eye twitched. "VOOOOOOIIIIIII! I AM NOT GAY! AND I AM NOT A TRANSVESTITE!"_

_"Do you think he does parties?"_

_"Yeah, maybe he could do a Mardi Gras for my birthday!"_

_"I – AM – A – FUCKING – 14 – YEAR – OLD - GUY!"_

"_I think he's crazy..."_

_He couldn't take it anymore. Dumping the shirt back onto the rack, he stormed out of the store. Screw it all! From this day forth, Serena could just wear guy clothes. Baggy boxers. Hoodies. Loose jackets. Cargo pants. He didn't give a fuck._

_*end of flashback*_

* * *

><p>I lifted what appeared to be black underwear. I stretched the waistband and flipped it around. "I assume these are boxers right?"<p>

"Duh dumbass. What else could they be?" Bel muttered, rolling his eyes.

I flipped it around a few more times. "Do guys really wear this stuff? Doesn't it get stuck in your butt crack or something? And how the hell does this fit on guys? Don't you have like, some extra organ?"

All members of the Varia choked on their food.

To think they ever thought Serena was still an innocent little girl.

* * *

><p>The Varia used my limousine voucher for the ride back, so it was at least a comfortable ride home.<p>

"She wakes up so late, yet a shopping trip makes her sleepy," Levi scoffed.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you're just upset because you got the shittier camera, pervert," Bel sneered.

"But it is weird...Serena never sleeps in the afternoon," Squalo murmured (strokes imaginary beard).

I groaned, putting a hand on my temple. "That's because I haven't slept for four days...and just when I try, some idiot *insert glare to a certain prince*wakes me up after two hours," I revealed, yawning and scratching my head. "How loud do you people talk anyways?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...only a dumbass wouldn't sleep for four days," Bel sassed defensively.

"Yeah well, I'm nearly finished on my project. The balance is almost perfect...and since I can't do anything for a few more days, I might as well pull as many all-nighters as I can," I objected.

"No more all-nighters. Go back to sleep."

"It's really important. And I am totally *yawn* not tired..." I lied unconvincingly, failing to push him away. "I haven't started hallucinating yet anyways. Though I suppose that could be because - "

"Sleep!" Squalo growled so forcefully I felt my eyes droop. "If you wake up again, I'll knock you out."

"Sir yes Sir, Strategy Captain Squalo..." I murmured, giving a mock salute.

"I honestly don't understand the relationship you two have," Levi remarked.

"It's complicated."

* * *

><p>Social events were stupid. Squalo had always thought of it that way. Women dressed in garments that revealed too much. Men spoke sugar coated words to each other in hopes of achieving more for their personal gain. They ate, they lied, and at the end of the night they'd have wasted a shitload of money.<p>

Ridiculous.

He couldn't believe he was trying to find someone worthy to be a boss in this dump. But today was his last chance to find someone. And if he chose randomly...well, he could just kill them again, right?

But what kind of a boss was he looking for?

Strong. Scary. Boss like. Prideful.

Someone exactly like that guy he was staring at.

One look, and Squalo knew he was never going to be able to beat the stranger in a fight.

* * *

><p><em>In the Varia Mansion...<em>

It was relatively dark when I woke. Perhaps that's the reason why I didn't see it. Maybe I did see it, but I was ignoring it. But once I turned on my bedside lamp, I screamed.

I have this weird logic.

2 legs: I can live with. Humans have 2 legs (normally, if they haven't been amputated or disfigured)  
>4 legs: A lot of warm, fuzzy animals that look cute have 4 legs. No problemo.<br>6 legs: Pushing the limit buddy. I admit, I'll squirm if I touch it. But so long as it stays a decent meter away from me, I'll be fine.  
>88+legs: Scream, freeze in terror, scream some more.

Oh course, there have been 'geniuses' in my lifetime (aka. Dino or Squalo) who've said things like 'what if it had no legs?' or a 'mutated five legged dog?'

Bottom line; more than 4 legs = do not like.

Back onto the topic, a spider was dangling about a few feet in front of my face. I'm not talking about one of those miniature spiders you find on your clothes line; I'm talking about one of those unbelievably big hairy ones that have eight eyes and fangs that twitch around on a piece of web.

I didn't dare to breathe. It could sway around, right? So I did the most reasonable thing I could think of – run away whilst screaming my lungs out. I grabbed a sword from my wall as I ran out the door – just in case it was following me. Course it wasn't though.

Immediately, Lussuria and Bel were by my side. It was rather touching. But then again, it was kinda stalker like...

"What's wrong?" Lussuria murmured, mud mask on his face. (That in itself was actually rather frightening).

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...did you see a ghost?" Bel snickered.

"Too many legs..." was all I could stutter.

They took a peek inside my room.

"Tch. You're afraid of a stupid spider? Of all possibilities, THAT?"

* * *

><p><em>At a party...<em>

"VOI! Xanxus, I swear. I won't cut my hair until that plan comes into effect," Squalo insisted with a grin.

"Yeah," Xanxus agreed, staring at the fireworks on the sunrise.

"You should swear too. Don't cut your hair."

"Huh. How stupid. Do you really think you could be useful with the arm the sword emperor made useless?"

"VOI! Don't misunderstand. I threw away this hand to understand the technique of the sword emperor, who was missing that hand. That's the strength of my resolve to go along with you."

Xanxus sneered and took another sip of tequila.

Coming from him, Squalo decided that was as good as a yes. "Just watch, Mr. Heir. One day you'll be grateful you made me your ally; and the Varia your subordinates."

"Hn."

* * *

><p><em>In the Varia Mansion...<em>

"Serena, don't worry, I'll get rid of it for you," Lussuria assured.

"Ah! You can't do that! If you kill it, it'll come back for revenge!"

*facepalm*

"Stop wasting the prince's time," Bel ordered angrily, throwing a knife right through the spider and pinning it on the other side of the room. Walking casually, he crossed my room and inspected his work. "Dead."

I didn't trust him. I recalled Squalo once chopping a spider in half – but it still survived. I took a few steps closer, and put down my sword. "It's not dead. I just saw it twitch."

"It's just a nerve reaction dumbass!" Bel growled, pulling the knife (spider still attached) from the wall.

"No – Bel!" I tried to warn, picking up a bow and arrow.

The spider twitched, and its fangs pitched forward to Bel's hand.

I shot it. (Later I would deny that I wanted to help Bel, but I was trying to shoot him and missed by accident). Unfortunately, the Varia had a very poor architect – two stabbings in one night was obviously too much, and so the wall collapsed revealing a whole infestation of spiders.

I knew it would come back for revenge.

At that moment, I couldn't even breathe. I was just simply terrified. Bel threw a few knives, but I suppose he didn't keep as many knives with him in his pyjamas than usual, because he backed away and stood next to me. Hundred of legs...crawling, creeping...*shudders*

But a miracle happened. This giant burst of orange (from behind me) blew up my room. Shame...I'd only just moved in after all.

"In the Varia, we kill the weak," a gruff voice dictated behind me.

My head snapped around, and I gasped.

That was the man from my dream.

Xanxus.

* * *

><p><strong>Have a nice day, ciao ~ :]<strong>


	13. Inheritance

**Peppermint twertle, I thank you for your amazing realization skills - I'll attempt to fix the personality issues.**

**Please enjoy :]**

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 13 – Inheritance<span>

I learnt a new word today.

Scum.

It's not that I don't know what it means, or had people call me that (as a matter of fact): but I've never seen a guy who likes it so much.

A guy who's kinda...now my boss.

I also discovered Squalo's true nickname. Trash-shark. Yeah, I know, it's not very nice, but you've got to admit: it's rather catchy.

So, Xanxus in a nutshell. Scary, tequila, steak, yelling, shooting. Pretty small nut, huh? I tried and tried, but I couldn't put my finger on why Squalo chose Xanxus.

Speaking of Squalo, it was really nice to see him in my room for sibling purposes – though technically I told him to come. "Wow Serena, you really went all out on this," Squalo remarked, swinging his arm/sword around.

I shrugged with a smile. It was nice to see a sword in/on Squalo's hand. Very fitting. "I _really _think you should take it off just in case you activate some of the schematics -"

*swish* (Explosives fly out of the edge of the sword and destroy my newly rebuilt wall).

"– by...accident." I sighed, and picked up a burning page of my homework. "Well, I'm just gonna sleep on the couch again. Can you tell the builders to come back tomorrow?"

* * *

><p><em>The following morning...<em>

"And you have your cell phone?" Squalo continued, chewing on a bagel.

"Sí."

"Emergency money?"

"Yes," I replied, playing with languages.

"Weapons?"

"Yosh."

He frowned. "That doesn't mean 'yes' Serena."

"It sounds cool. Would you rather I go 'hai, oni-chan!'" I barked with a choppy French accent.

"...Should I ask?"

"It felt like the right thing to do."

"If someone asks where you've been, what do you say?"Lussuria called from the other side of the table, understandably feeling just a little sorry for Squalo.

"Fuck you, douche bag."

"And if people mention the Varia, what do you say?" Squalo sighed.

"Whaaaaaat?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...and if a teacher asks you, dumbass?"Bel sniggered.

"Call my dog - I mean - boss Xanxus, and he might give you an answer before he kills you."

Xanxus glared. "Oi scum. If anyone calls, I'll kill _you_. Got it?" he growled from the head of the table, glass of tequila in his hand.

"Was immer du sagst, Führer Xanxus," I grumbled, giving a mock salute and dragged my backpack over my shoulder. _And drinking tequila, is totally detrimental to your health._

"What did you say about my health?" Xanxus boomed from behind me.

"Your health is just…fine. I uh...didn't say anything," I shuddered. I was still getting used to the whole mafia I-know-and-see-everything-you-do sixth sense; much creepier than seeing dead people.

"And you know the inheritance ceremony is tonight?" Mammon inquired.

"God damn it - twelve times now! I know!"

They waited patiently.

I rolled my eyes, counting off my fingers. "Get back before five. Wear the Varia uniform. Go to Naples. Reception ends are midnight. It ain't rocket science."

"There is one more thing," Squalo decided after a few seconds of silence.

"Squalo! Don't say yet, it's a surprise!" Lussuria giggled.

Uh oh. Something was up. Lussuria looked _happy_. VERY bad sign. I pretended to read my watch. "Well, will you look at the time! I gotta fucking go to school – so if you're going to surprise me, by all means, watch out when I kill you."

"Don't say that Serena! I'm sure you'll love it!" Lussuria insisted.

"You're sure _you'll _love it…" I corrected.

* * *

><p>So. My first class on firearms.<p>

Disaster.

It's safe to say my teacher didn't really care about first impressions. He wore an eye patch, was smoking a cheap cigarette and had a face that seemed to have a constant scowl – or maybe that was just me. His English had a heavy Russian accent.

"Everyone! Listen! This is new classmate for you, Serena. I don't like having kid in class, but I do as told. Start warm-up shootings exercise," my instructor ordered, pushing me roughly into a more secluded room.

Geez. I suppose the mafia doesn't have many nice teachers either. It would've been nice if he said a hello or something.

The door slammed shut behind us. "Look, I don't know why you here. Too young. Too weak to shoot the gun," my instructor complained, putting a pistol on the table in front of me.

I thought it were best not to mention I'd already killed somebody with a gun before. So I nodded.

"I do not tolerate tardiness, I do not tolerate insolence. Understand?"

Nod.

"If I think you no good, you no longer part of this class."

Nod.

"And if you don't do what I - think fast!" he advised out of the blue, drawing his gun.

I yawned. The nodding was actually pretty exhausting.

"Boom. You dead now," he affirmed.

"No kidding Sherlock."

"Quiet, child. My name Alexei, no Sherlock here." The gun was lowered from my head. His mood completely changed from 'I'm gonna kill you!' to educational. "This is Glock-17 Austrian pistol; 17 rounds one magazine. Today I teach you how to take apart, put together. Understand the technology, and you will understand weapon. Do not shoot self like me…" he described, pointing at his eye patch.

Of course. Like shooting your own eye is totally going to happen... *nervous chuckle*.

Once I learnt the basics, he left and started yelling at the rest of my class – I could've sworn he said 'earmuffs for sissies; you think I wear earmuffs when I try kill Stalin?'

Near the end of the lesson, my instructor popped in again.

"Assemble and disassemble," he ordered.

I noticed him set a timer as I concentrated. There were a few times in which I almost dropped some screws, but I suppose I put it together right again. Well...I may've forgotten the trigger. Accidents happen right?

"You still die," he commented, almost amused as I angrily pulled it apart and stuck in the trigger. "But fast enough. Remember trigger next time."

"Hn." I forcefully shoved in the magazine and slammed the pistol on the table. "I want to shoot something," I murmured honestly.

"You want to shoot something?" my instructor almost laughed. "Shoot me first, and then I'll let you shoot something."

"Really?" I asked brightly. I picked up the gun, pointed at his head and was about to squeeze the trigger when he put both hands in front of him defensively.

"I joke! Don't worry, next lesson I teach you how to shoot the gun. Yes?"

Tch. I still wanted to shoot him. Why did people have to go like 'oh! Have this really nice, tempting lolly, but doooon't eat it!'

* * *

><p>Half an hour later, I was sitting in my usual spot on the main building roof, twirling a fork in my spaghetti. School was boring. Assassination wasn't my cup of tea. So...what was I meant to do? *sigh*<p>

Five minutes later, I still hadn't taken a single bite. No appetite. I tipped the contents on the far corner, and watched a few pigeons flutter over and peck at the long strands. "Ciaossu." _There's something...on my head. _When I looked up, I was not expecting a baby in a suit and a black fedora grinning as he hopped off and went through an air vent.

It took me a few seconds to remember I had an English test, and I needed to start moving. But what was that baby's name? I'm sure I knew him.

River.

No. That wasn't right.

Rollo?

Nope. Didn't quite have the same ring to it.

Rebecca.

45% sure that was a girl's name.

Raj.

...I dislike my brain.

Reborn! That's right. Superhuman baby. How could I forget?

"ARGH! Watch out!" a familiar voice warned as I reached the twist in the staircase.

Crash. Thud. Slide. Bang. Groans of pain. ITAI.

"Thanks for nothing: my butt now hurts more than my head..." I mumbled grouchily.

"Serena! I'm so glad to see you!" a cheerful voice stated, followed by a dorky laugh.

There's only one person I know who has a dorky yet cute laugh. "Dino?"

"Ha ha! You didn't recognise me? Oh, have you seen this baby running around? He won't give back my math homework!"

I cocked my head to one side. "Do you mean Reborn? Why'd he steal our homework?"

"You _know _him?" Dino almost shrieked, getting up and offering me a hand. "How?"

"I met him this one time at a park," I summarised, brushing off dust from my skirt and stood up on my own. After all, there was no need for the two of us to fall down...again.

"Oh. I see," Dino muttered, in deep thought.

"Do you know him? Is he like your baby cousin twice removed or something?" I asked confused.

"Hell no! Well...he's my new tutor. Ridiculous right?" he smiled, letting out another laugh.

Something flew out from the nearest air vent, and kicked Dino in the face. Reborn. "It's rude to talk badly about your tutor, Pipsqueak Dino," he lectured. "Your friend doesn't even trust you to help her up from the floor."

We both blushed, and Dino yelled angrily/embarrassedly at Reborn. "Just give back my homework! Where is it?"

"I burnt it."

"What the - ?" *face palm* "Why?!"

"Every question was answered incorrectly," Reborn pointed out.

"IT'S NOT MY FAULT YOU WERE BLOWING UP HALF MY HOUSE WHEN YOU WERE MEANT TO BE TEACHING ME!" Dino yelled back defensively, earning a kick for his efforts.

"There's no such thing as a bad tutor, only a bad student," Reborn recited.

"What the hell are you talking about? It's: 'there's no such thing as a bad _student_, only a bad _tutor_," Dino shot back.

Reborn just pinched Dino's wrist and twisted it behind his back. "OW! Let go Reborn! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"

Wow. Abusive tutor much.

"Serena, shouldn't you be at an Inheritance Ceremony?" Reborn questioned, casually sitting cross-legged on Dino's head.

"Later," I shrugged. "It's not like I want to go anyway."

"You can't run away from a commitment," Reborn interjected.

"And apparently you can't run away from a commitment you didn't make by your own choice either," I put in. "Shouldn't you guys be working on math or something?"

The bell rang.

"Agh Reborn! Handing in homework that's completely wrong is still better than not handing in anything at all!" Dino's voice trailed as he waved me off and ran to his next class.

"That would defy the purpose and waste the teacher's time," Reborn's serious voice floated from the staircase. "Next time, do it properly so I won't have to put it out of its misery."

"..."

* * *

><p>Flick. Flick. Flick. Gently tapping my pen on the paper, I tried to skim over my work. There's a reason why I hate English tests. It's because my teacher loves riddles. Too much. He believes that if you truly understand English, you can answer riddles logically. (<strong>AN**: These are actually just for fun. The answers are at the end of this chapter.)

1) If a plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada, where would they bury the survivors?

2) A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms. The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of assassins with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven't eaten in years. Which room is safest for him?

3) This is an unusual paragraph. I'm curious how quickly you can find out what is so unusual about it. It looks so plain you would think nothing was wrong with it. In fact, nothing is wrong with it. It is unusual though. Study it, and think about it, but you still may not find anything odd. But if you work at it a bit, you might find out.

4) An Arab sheikh is old and must will his fortune to one of his two sons. He makes a proposition. His two sons will ride their camels in a race, and whichever camel crosses the finish line last will win the fortune for its owner. During the race, the two brothers wander aimlessly for days, neither willing to cross the finish line. In desperation, they ask a wise man for advice. He tells them something; the brothers then leap onto camels and charge toward the finish line. What did the wise man say?

See? Stupid. There's practically no right or wrong answer. I stared at the crack between the blind and the window blanking, contemplating my place in the universe. Suddenly, something blocked my line of sight. A helicopter. With Xanxus standing at the door. Even though my lip reading was tragic, Xanxus had a limited vocabulary.

_Oi scum. Get a move on._

I looked at my watch. They were early. Squalo came to the door of the helicopter as well tapping on his watch. No VOI! Today? Oh. I had forgotten. The windows were soundproof.

_Hurry up!_

I can't. I'm in the middle of an English test.

_Who gives the fuck?_

I'm going to get busted if I try to get out. Why don't you try to do something?

Xanxus considered for a moment, then drew one of his guns and took aim. I almost screamed and fell out of my chair.

WAIT! I'LL GO TALK. PUT DOWN THE FUCKING GUN.

_Twenty seconds scum._

"Serena, stop making funny movements and looking out the window!" my teacher barked.

"Huh what? Sorry dude."

"Dude?!"

"Geez, don't get you're knickers in a twist," I grumbled, snapping my attention from Xanxus. You won't believe how bad a mood he can put you in.

"How dare you – DETENTION, my office after class. Got that?" he snarled.

_10 seconds, trash…_

"Well…you wouldn't mind putting that on hold would you?" I remembered, shoving my test into one of his hands and packing up at full speed. I ignored the stares from the rest of my class.

"SIT DOWN IN YOUR SEAT!"

"Go sit down in your seat. What happened to 'it's a free country'?"

"SERENA DI SQUALO, IF YOU WALK THROUGH THAT DOOR, YOU'RE EXPELLED!"

"Oh! Is that a riddle too? In that case, I'm taking the window..." I decided brightly, lifting the blinds to reveal the Varia's helicopter. Instantly, I felt a hand grip onto my wrist, and I saw my teacher struggling for balance.

"T-That's t-the V-Varia...!"

"...Duh."

The sound of splintering glass and roar of rotors interrupted the increasing tension. Xanxus landed neatly without the need to crouch. "Trash." He loomed over my teacher. "You got a problem?" It was clear his aura was doing something. No wait – his hand was lighting up a little too. Dying will flame?

"N-no Sir!" my teacher squeaked, paling significantly.

I grinned. "Excellent. Have a nice day, y'all." Xanxus left, and I followed suit. As the helicopter began a steady ascent, I wanted to thank him – but Xanxus spoke first. "If you ever waste my time again scum, I'll shoot you." After that, he sat down, folded his arms and seemed to go to sleep.

I'd barely remembered what I was doing when Squalo dragged me down next to him.

"I'm gonna give you three shots okay?" he asked, raising an eyebrow and pulled out a few syringes.

"Again? What's the point?" I complained, staring outside the window as I rolled up my sleeve.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...afraid of needles, dumbass?"Bel grinned, leaning over the back of my seat.

I shrugged. "If you must know, I like getting injections. It feels cool. And it makes me partially high. But I'm not in the mood to enjoy it today."

"That, *stabs needle* is because you've never had a gamma globulin, meningococcal or human papillomavirus vaccine," Squalo explained, reaching for a second needle.

*face palm*."Squalo. My immune system is just fine; a meningococcal vaccination only last three years and papillomavirus is caused by *stabs extremely hard* SEXUAL transmission," I finished, eyes watering a little.

"It's just a precaution! If by some chance you do get poisoned, drugged or raped, I'll know you'll be okay!" Squalo argued, stabbing the third syringe so hard the needle snapped off.

"It's so nice to see you have so much faith..." I muttered, gently pulling out the metallic tip. "But you do know vaccinations take like two weeks till they start functioning right?"

"..."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~…epic fail, commander trash-shark," Bel giggled.

* * *

><p>The ceremony hall was very impressive. Actually it wasn't. It was just a giant room with flimsy architecture, at least a hundred grim looking people and sparkly...everything.<p>

Finally, the Ninth and External Advisor entered, we pledged our loyalty ; then as tradition, we all contributed a few drops of blood into a cup and took a sip. _So Squalo actually had a reason to give me a bunch of injections, huh_. The ceremony itself was quite short; it was the reception that tore a scar through my memory.

You'd think that traditions would mean nothing to Xanxus, but nooooooooo. To flush out unworthy subordinates, guests were welcome to assassinate the Varia Officers. We couldn't kill them unfortunately.

As I walked with Squalo to the 'celebration' hall, I decided to thank him. "Say, Squalo, can we stay in pairs? You watch my back, I watch yours, fish sticks, yada yada yada?"

He didn't reply. Instead, he put his arm around my shoulder and steered me into a room, my suspicion rising higher by the second. The moment we stepped into the room, there was giggling, and a black bag was shoved over my head. After half a minute of creative language and kicking around, I felt myself being tied to a chair. The bag came off.

My first thought was that it was too bright. I squinted in front of me and saw some random lady dress in black and red. "Oh big whoop. Listen, lady, I ain't taking no lecture from you!"

Lussuria bounded between us. "Don't you love it? You look adorable!"

"...Huh?"

Squalo's head popped into my top front of vision. "Do you like it?"

I looked behind Lussuria, and with horror, realized I was looking at a mirror.

D-D-Dress?

"Stay still Serena, I have to do something with your hair – honestly; you have a split end here! And here!"Lussuria wailed.

"You sound like you're dying Lussuria. Who gives the crap? It's just hair," Levi grunted from somewhere behind me. I wanted to flip him off, but it was just a tad bit hard to when both your arms were handcuffed to a chair.

"Smile, Serena," Lussuria chided. "You look cute."

"I don't want to look 'cute'." I took a quick glance at the others, and frowned deeper. "You're all wearing suits; so why the fuck am I wearing..._this_? Do you even know how hard it is NOT to flash?"

"Because you're a _girl_," Mammon pointed out. Even he was wearing something that looked like a suit – though I'm not quite sure how the hoodie fit in…

"My civvies are for guys. My Varia uniform is a guy uniform. You even _told_ me not to act girly. And now you're forcing me to wear a dress?!" I argued defiantly. "Do you want me to be some cross dresser or something?"

Squalo opened his mouth, but closed it and decided to rephrase his words more carefully. "Cross dressing only applies to guys. Just think about this psychologically – you see this innocent girl, all alone. You decide to attack her and then VOOOIII! She beats the crap out of you!"

*Facepalm*

* * *

><p>Apparently a few straps of leather is now called a shoe. Fancy that.<p>

Every person I'd passed had already tried to kill me at least once. So Squalo had been right about one thing. "YAAARGH!"

Oh look. Another one. I sidestepped, stuck out a foot and tripped the guy. "Might not want to scream, if you're trying to assassinate someone," I murmured. Urgh. All these assassination attempts makes one unbelievably thirsty.

Personally, I believe bars are very unimpressive things. There are always a few serious discussers, pedo's, flirters, drinkers and nut jobs. Of course, add various alcoholic drinks, few stools and you've got yourself a bar.

"Hi. What can I get you?" Ah. The bartender. Forgot about him.

"Water please."

"I've got beer or wine; that's got the lowest alcohol content," he replied, glancing at my size. "What do you feel like?"

"I'm feeling like ice cubes?" I suggested. "You know, cold, H2O, solid or liquid, covers over two thirds of the earth's surface?"

"I'm sorry; Master Xanxus has ordered only alcoholic drinks to be served."

Curses. "Fine. Give me your strongest."

He raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure..? You _are_ underage..."

"My first drink deserves at least a hangover," I insisted.

"Ha! That sounds like fun – mind if I join you?" a blond man asked, taking a seat beside me.

Blink. I'm really getting tired of people who walk up to you and just expect you to know them (though I probably should). "Um...remind me, you are…?"

"Sawada Iemitsu. Vongola Famiglia External Advisor." We shook hands, and surprisingly, he didn't even try to kill me. That's a good thing right? "Bartender! Two shots of your finest vodka!"

"Coming right up...Sir," he hesitated.

Iemitsu drank his in one. Cautiously, I took a sniff and recoiled. Alcohol was highly flammable right? Hopefully, Xanxus wouldn't shoot me today.

* * *

><p>Squalo stiffened. He wasn't quite sure if heard correctly. <em>'AHA HA HA HA! Suck that, I split the arrow again! Where's my vodka?' <em>That voice was definitely Serena's. Not good…

He pushed his way through a crowd, and his jaw dropped.

* * *

><p>I lost track of how many shot's I had. Last count was about seven, maybe eight. But that was a while ago. I was currently having a drink off with Iemitsu: we'd each drink a shot of vodka, then try to hit a bulls-eye.<p>

"All right *hic* Iemitsu, I bet you can't *hic* hit a bulls-eye this time..." I giggled, swaying on my feet.

"Aha! Watch this then…" *throws pickaxe, destroying most of the board* "HA!"

I took another shot of vodka. Pulling out my last arrow, I could barely keep my arms up. But it still flew and split my previous arrow in two. "FUCK YEAH!"

Someone tried to get their arms around my neck, but I swerved and grabbed their belt; their pants falling shortly after. I made a mental note: assassination attempt #173. Funny, how I could remember that, yet I couldn't even remotely remember the number of drinks I'd had.

Grabbing the bottle, I was about to pour myself another shot when Squalo appeared. "VOI! Stop drinking that!"

I walked over to him, ignoring the crowd. I'd never even realized how much attention I'd accidentally stirred up. "Hey! Meet my *hic* drinking buddy – Iemitsu or what-his-name..." Burying my face in his stomach, I exhaled. "You smell nice Squalo *hic*. Did you use aftershave? No wait *hic*; its cologne...anyways, vodka time!" I went for another swig, but Squalo took the bottle from my hand.

"VOI! No more drinking!"

"If you must blame anyone *hic*, blame Xanxus. He made it an alcohol *hic* only thingymabobby…" I piped up.

"How many shots of this did you drink?"

"Who cares? I'm going to die miserably with no soul!" Although I was sober enough to consider I was slightly too happy when I'd said that.

"We're going back to the hotel." Muttering darkly about stupid bosses and alcohol, Squalo dragged me across the room. "Honestly Serena, grow up and learn some responsibility. I can't always pick up after you."

I sighed, passing out on the spot. _Yeah, well, I can still hope._

* * *

><p>"VOI! Wake up!" Squalo yelled at Serena, coming to a stop in front of Xanxus and Levi.<p>

Xanxus' eyes stirred, annoyed. "Oi, trash-shark. Shut it."

"VOI! _You _trash! Alcohol only? WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING?" Squalo stormed, trying to prop up his barely conscious sister.

"Tch. No one told her to drink," Levi replied, uptight.

Suddenly, she woke up, swaying. "This is so *hic* epic! I never thought Xanxus *hic* would be such a great role model!"

"..."

*Insert evil Squalo glare*

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...did I hear dumbass say that?" Bel sniggered, walking towards them with Mammon.

"Mammon...I never got *hic* ask – are you actually a guy? It's really hard to *hic*tell coz you wear those weird robes all the time..."

"...I believe she's drunk..." _She'd better be drunk..._

"Bel, my man! You're getting kinda round these days. Hang on a second..that's just my eyesight. AHA HA HA HA!"

"All right, maybe we should get her back to the hotel," Lussuria muttered, arriving on the scene.

She swaggered off to some random person. _"Check this out – I can totally say pi *hic* – 3.1415926535897932384 *hic* damn! I got lost..."_

"I have to say, she actually seems intelligent when she's drunk…" Levi considered.

"_Twinkle, twinkle, little BAT; how I wonder what you're AT, up above the world you fly, like a tea tray in the sky…."_

"What the hell are you saying? She's completely loopy, you pervert," Bel murmured.

Squalo shook his head to clear his thoughts. "Either way, there's no way she's staying here!"

"Who gives? There's only an hour or two left," Bel pointed out. "And it's like she's going to die or anything."

"_Can you hold this knife for a second? I gotta tie these stupid shoes again…"_

"You're not going anywhere trash-shark," Xanxus commanded. "Do your job."

"I'm not doing it. She should just walk home herself," Levi stated.

"I just met this really cute guy down by the bar…"

"I'm a baby. It's not like I can do anything."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I'm not giving up fun!"

"VOI! Xanxus, since this is YOUR fault, YOU can take her back!" Squalo bellowed.

"No."

"_Ow…you nearly took my eye – here, you gotta lift your arms just a little higher. Try again! I promise I'll stand still."_

Squalo rushed to grab Serena away from inevitable peril. "XANXUS. BE A MAN. IT'S YOUR JOB."

"...Fine."

* * *

><p><em>Twenty minutes later…<em>

"Mm…you smell different Squalo. Did you drink a few beers?" I murmured, feeling my arms around someone's neck. It was raining. Oddly enough, it felt very soothing.

Xanxus didn't know how to answer. Should he answer? "Shut it and go back to sleep," he finally decided.

"Easier said than done...do you like Xanxus?"

"..."

"I think he's scary. But he seems nice. Why did you choose him to be the boss?"

It took every ounce of anger not to yell and shoot the girl on his back. "I...don't know." Why did the trash-shark choose him anyway?

"If you want me to be honest, the coup d'état he wants to have sounds awfully suspicious. Isn't he going to be a Vongola boss anyway?"

"Hn."

"He could be adopted – he and the Ninth are nothing alike when you think about it. But you can tell the Ninth really loves him. I suppose he has his reasons..."

"And what reasons might that be scu – Serena?"

"I dunno– it seems complicated. I don't like the Ninth much either; so personally it's a win-win situation. Ya know?"

"You don't like the Ninth?"

"Hell no! I thought you might've figured it out by now and all...I promise you, I'm going to get that ranking in school, and we'll be out of this shitty game..."

"You don't like the Varia?"

"Can't say that either. I mean, they're so good at being bad they're just a little good. To be honest, I think killing people is a stupid business. Don't you feel sympathy for corpses?"

"No."

"...You seem odd. Oh good grief...!" She pushed herself off his back, ran to the nearest clump of bushes and puked.

Xanxus watched her leave. Idiotic girl; just a worthless subordinate. But she was right- why did he want to kill his father? He'd given him everything he'd ever wanted. Status. Money. He'd clothed him, fed him, and made him the man he was. He shook his head. Fuck that. Involuntary love was pointless.

"Xa – Xanxus? Why're you here?" she stammered, surprised.

"You took your stupid time to puke, so the trash-shark left," Xanxus snapped, starting to walk away.

* * *

><p>A real hangover isn't all that bad. On a painannoyance scale, it's only about a seven. Could be worse right? But then again, here I was, stuck with a few too hundred many crepes. Misreading a two for seventy on a recipe wasn't that big a deal, right?

I only had a few small cuts and bruises here and there, so I figured nothing from the previous night was worth remembering. I'd already had a vague plan for the rest of my day; judging that it was currently about eight in the morning, I'd somehow get back to Sicily and go surprise Dino is his mansion at eleven; it was his birthday after all. I wanted to tug his ears fifteen times (weird Italian tradition).

I was in the midst of my bizarre thoughts when the Varia trickled into the kitchen.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you bought breakfast. How thoughtful, dumbass," Bel giggled, taking the seat opposite from me.

"I _made _breakfast. Therefore it's mine, and I'm not sharing," I replied, pulling the plate closer to me and further from him.

"Smells wonderful! I'm just gonna grab – "

I whacked Lussuria's hand away. "_Mine_." Readjusting the plate to the other side, I squeezed on some lemon and sugar. Yum.

"Any injuries this time?" Squalo asked, taking the seat next to me.

"Used the wrong side of the knife, my hand slipped with the grater, and even though I tripped, I managed to balance myself on the pan."

"Geez...at least the crepes look symmetrical today," Squalo grinned, reaching for the top piece.

"Hey! Who said you could have one?"

"I'm your brother…?"

"You totally ditched me last night."

"I did? Sharing is caring!"

"Go make your own bloody crepes."

"Hand over the nutella dumbass," Bel called, somehow getting his hand on a stack of my crepes.

"Fuck you Bel! Give them back!"

"Can you pass the honey?" Lussuria called to Levi.

"Sure. Got any jam?"

"GIVE BACK MY GOD DAMN CREPES!"

"You really need to protect your breakfast better Serena," Squalo shrugged, helping himself.

"What the – THIS ISN'T SHARING. THIS IS STEALING," I yelled defiantly.

"This is the Varia. Live with it scum," Xanxus yawned as he sat down, my entire plate magically appearing in front of him.

"&^^#^*!#$#$&$*$#!$^#$%%^!"

"Impressive – you can swear in seven languages," Lussuria grinned.

"!#$&^%$*!^$*#^#%$*!##%*#&%!#&^$#%^&#%^%#%!#^$$&^#*!#!*!#$#*%#&$^#^%$#*%^#!%#$^#%$*!"

"Can you turn on the T.V Mammon?"

Screw them all! I stormed from the table, cursing angrily. But I couldn't help walking away with a completely unexplainable smile.

It'd been a while.

* * *

><p><em>ANSWERS TO RIDDLES (or this is what I would imagine Serena to say):<em>

1) How the hell do you bury survivors? It's illogical.

2) The lions. If they haven't eaten for years, then they'd be _long_ dead.

3) There is no letter 'e'. What kind of a riddle is that?

4) Switch camels. But then again, the wise man could've just said 'your father was lying; it was a stupidity test'.

**Have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	14. I can't fit the title

Chapter 14 - Two Days After Two Days Before The Day After Tomorrow

"Geez; I can't believe I bothered to go halfway across the country for this," I grumbled more to the ceiling than myself or Reborn, stretching and taking a seat just outside Dino's room. Apparently he was sleeping in. I kinda expected that, but unfortunately, that meant some quality time with one super baby hitman.

"You're doing well," Reborn finally spoke, in his folded-arm position.

I shrugged, completely uninterested. _Say something Serena. He'll take offence. _I forced a convincing smile. "That would depend completely on perspective."

"I see you don't want to talk to me Serena."

Curse his mind reading. Or body language mind translation. "That...would also depend on perspective."

"You couldn't remember my name? I see you learn little from previous errors."

"Hey! Leave me alone!" I whined back, attempting to play the perfect poker face. The attempt just made it worse.

"You're a bit young to get drunk, Serena. You should wait another ten years."

"Stop it Reborn."

"The Varia's a tough bunch huh?" he continued leisurely, obviously having a great time.

"That's it! END of your one sided telepathy conversation! Finito!" I hissed.

"Hm. I've had my fun. How have you been doing lately? Getting enough sleep?"

"Define _sleep_."

"School?"

"It's fine."

"How's the job?"

"Could be worse," I muttered, frantically thinking of a different topic. Twenty questions with Reborn was like a mental interrogation. "So how's Dino going? Think you'll be able to make him into a great boss?"

Reborn looked slightly grim, in my opinion. Like a reaper. "He'll be tough one. But I never fail."

"Never? How many students have you had?" I stammered.

"About a hundred."

I raised a suspicious eyebrow. "And all of them are really, REALLY successful Mafioso?"

"None of them completed their training," he shrugged casually as if there was nothing wrong with his statistics.

"..." Now I understand. Dino would eventually crack and die. Reborn was even expecting it.

What a sadistic tutor.

At about that point, Reborn probably had enough chit-chat and decided it was time for Dino to get up. Apparently his chameleon could completely defy the laws of science; but hey –I'd seen the impossible day after day. How much could a little more impossibility hurt? Ah…bad pun. Dino probably felt a lot of pain from the defibrillator.

* * *

><p>Half an hour later, we were both in a car, being driven into the city.<p>

"So, Dino – how's it feel to be 15?" I mused staring out the tinted windows.

He groaned. "Terrible! I do ten times more work than the fourteen year old me ever had to do!" All of a sudden, he leaned closer to me and whispered fearfully in my ear. "You have to run! I don't know what he's planned. He actually made me go back to death mountain yester -aaaggghhh!"

Dino's ear was dragged to the opposite side of the limousine. Ouch. "Pipsqueak Dino, it'll be fun," Reborn said innocently (big non-blinking eyes and all).

"Fun?" I muttered suspiciously. "I'm growing rather wary of your definitions."

"Do you know what B.A.S.E stands for?" Reborn questioned.

I hate it when people answer a question with a question. Dino offered a weak guess. "Berlin Aging Study?"

Reborn smirked. "Building, Antennae, Span, Earth. Basically, base jumping is just when you jump off something really high with a parachute, hope the wind's in your favour, and then flutter to the earth and possibly break a leg."

*awkward silence*

"That can't be legal," I stuttered weakly.

"It's not," he assured me. "But then again, we're mafia, so who gives?"

"..." Oh the illogicity of it all...

"You're sure it's _not _the Berlin Aging Study?" Dino confirmed.

*Reborn smirk*

That was too much. As if on impulse, both Dino and I lurched for the side doors, but gaped as we found them locked shut.

We were trapped.

* * *

><p><em>On a skyscraper...<em>

"Ladies first?" Dino offered, yelling over the roar of the wind.

"Thanks, but no thanks!" I replied, fidgeting uncontrollably. I detested heights. Course, I hated spiders more, but staring at the miniature city...well I was willing to make a momentary truce.

"Count of three?" Dino asked, laughing nervously. "Actually, how about a count of five? Or how about never?"

_Dino has gotta be the biggest nutter in the world if he can still laugh in a place like this..._

"Suck it up, Pipsqueak Dino!" Reborn advised kicking him off the edge, landing neatly on the railing. "Need me to give you a push, Serena?" Instantly, I shook my head. With that, he jumped after the screaming Dino, Leon transforming into a mini parachute.

All right. Breathe in. Breathe out. _If I don't jump, Reborn will be...insulted. And then if Xanxus miraculously finds out_ (since he somehow knows everything I do) _that I chickened out of this, he'd probably shoot me._ So in the end, I'd get a choice to die by jumping off a building, getting shot by Xanxus or getting murdered by Reborn.

*sigh* Where was the option 'live happily ever after'?

I'd liked to have contemplated longer, but the door behind me banged open and a few security guards charged forward. Gosh, thanks Reborn; ignoring my advice on not leaving a trail of dead bodies.

Taking a step back, I took a mini run-up to the edge (yeah I know, one step isn't exactly a run up), bent my knees, but...stopped in the last moment. It wasn't enough to stop my overall momentum, sadly, so I fell victim to gravity's wrath.

The next ten seconds were highly indecisive. I screamed and flapped my arms wildly like a mad chicken for a few seconds, before remembering I needed to breathe. I'd forgotten how many seconds Reborn said I should free fall. 10? 20? ._..Hang on, I was supposed to count...? Oh screw it, better early than late. _Gritting my teeth (maybe it was my tongue) I pulled the primary cord of the parachute, just as Reborn had instructed.

Nothing happened.

I pulled again, and again, each pull more frantic than the last - but it seemed to be jammed. Excellent. Now I could even envision my tombstone. 'Here lies Serena di Squalo. Death by faulty parachute.' Not very dignified huh?

A small park came into my view. Attempting to walk on air, I targeted a fountain, though really, falling from that height into water would be worse than a brick wall. But _then_ my parachute finally decided to open and the canopy snagged on a tree.

My shoulders felt like they'd been wrenched off, but as always, I was lucky to survive for an estimated week of great pain and suffering.

As the sound of wailing sirens caught my attention, I freed myself from the parachute, bracing for impact whilst falling an insignificant distance...Dino (much to my surprise) _caught me_. Neatly, shockingly. Briefly concluding the status of my health, he lectured Reborn firmly, and ordered accompanying Cavallone family members left and right. Dino could actually be...cool.

I didn't care how busy he was. I reached up and tugged his ears fifteen times. "Buon compleano, Dino." _I don't get why it was so hard to say one fricking line._

* * *

><p>As days turned into weeks, studying became integrated into my 'free time'. Sad, I know. But I hadn't forgotten the deal I'd made with the Ninth; I needed that ranking. But then again, other 'commitments' were just as time consuming - school, every other fling with the Varia, Reborn's occasional surprises. I became somewhat nocturnal; I worked throughout the night, and slept whenever I could catch a wink during the day.<p>

Bullseyes. Stuffed dummies. Sewing machines. Locus. Electrons. I swear - every time I closed my eyes, I could see numbers and words swimming in my mind – doing three-sixties and laughing madly in my face.

Squalo's birthday came and went – he completely forgot. That wasn't really a surprise though, considering how meaningless birthdays used to be even when our parents were alive. So I threw a birthday party for just the two of us. Unfortunately Lussuria somehow found out, and well.

He's _Lussuria_.

It's not a surprise the entire Varia turned up – but hey; I'd imagined Martians might get invited too, so it was still a nice occasion. We had cake, played a few party games, and Xanxus was noticeably nicer for 24 hours. Actually, make that 22 hours and 44 seconds. That was when the tequila ran out.

Once that happened, he threw his empty glass at my head. Pissed, I tried to mine back at him, but I my arm had been a little injured at the time, so I missed and hit Bel, who then hit Squalo (it was meant for Levi but the guy ducked), who then hit Xanxus. My room (which just so happened to be above the living room) was utterly destroyed for the hundredth time. Literally.

Not long after that, Squalo discovered my school term report (I could've sworn I'd set it alight). He was proud I'd done well (actually, my grades were damn awesome), but he realised that I...was actually pretty good with a gun – rifles, pistols, M16's, you name it. It was kinda like my second calling (if my first was being a failure); and I became the only long-ranged Varia Officer...which resulted in more work.

Besides all that, the day (well actually, I only remember it because it was April Fools) was a marker of sorts. A lot of shit had happened in the past few months - my parents died, Squalo lost his hand, we joined the Varia, I killed people, Dino became my best friend; so on so forth.

When I looked in the mirror, I couldn't even recognise myself.

That same day, there was a mini crisis.

The Ninth lost his wallet.

When I'd first found out, I'd laughed in his face. I half expected him to suddenly laugh and say 'gotcha you April Fool! MU HA HA HA!' (fine, he doesn't actually laugh like that. It might be nice if he did though).

"Who gives? It's just a stupid wallet. How much did you lose? Couple hundred?" I muttered grumpily, exhausted. I'd slept through breakfast, was catching up on sleep during lunch and when I finally got my hands on a sandwich, I was abducted by the Ninth's men. I had every right to be irritable.

"The Vongola ledger was in there. So every single bank account the Vongola and its members are at risk," the Ninth shrugged. "That would include yours too."

"Who said you could have access to my bank account?" I grumbled, leaning on the back of a chair.

Pulling the chair towards himself (making me fall to the ground purposely), the Ninth sat down and put on a smile. Oh how I loathed that smile... "Well, as your leader, I'd have to pay you in some format."

"In cash," I groaned, rubbing my butt.

"If you don't get back my wallet, there won't be a next time now, will there?" he said ever so sweetly.

"Oh shut up you obnoxious old man." Apparently a local Italian police station had picked it up, completely oblivious to its contents and then Russians (who also hadn't realised any significance) had mysteriously gotten their hands on it.

By now, I was already wanted in 12 countries (4 of them dead or alive, 8 of them dead), Russia included. Though according to their report, I was also a mid-twenties female assassin, 6 foot 4 and based in Austria. (I felt deeply offended.)

Since Squalo was the only one with free time on his hands, we went together. Several VOI!'s later, we broke into the building intel had provided and...well...who knew the building belonged to the Giegue Family? And that they didn't like the Vongola family? Because I sure as hell didn't. I mean, the Vongola's the clam family, and they're the grave digger family, so you'd think we'd get along just fine – grave diggers ate clams every now and then, right?

In the depths of their turf, without many options, we barricaded ourselves in a solid room before giving democracy a try.

"I vote that we leave without a stupid ledger," I suggested tiredly, using a mop as support.

"This place is huge, Serena. Not to mention these assassins are good," Squalo pointed out. He seemed to sense my wavering confidence. "We're going to get out of this alive. I guarantee it."

I glanced around the poorly furnished room. There were quite a few racks holding designer handbags, designer watches, designer glasses and designer wallets. "Are we in a storage closet?"

Squalo caught on instantly. "Possibly. How much are you willing to bet, that all this stuff is stolen?"

"Ten bucks, maybe a twenty?"

"...That was rhetorical."

"...I knew that."

"Help me search."

An entire crate of wallets. They hadn't been emptied yet. "Squalo, there's like...hundreds of wallets that look virtually the same. How are we even going to - "

Squalo held up an impatient hand for silence. "I can identify the style. I'll pick them out, and you can sniff them. I'm sure you know the Ninth's scent well enough."

_...I don't want to sniff old man smell! _"Fine," I muttered darkly. "Do your thing."

It took exactly ten seconds to find. My luck was on fire today.

Squalo stored the wallet in one of his pockets, and took a deep breath. "Let's go."

"Um...outside to the_ adorable_ assassins wearing skull masks waiting for _us_?" I asked, using every bit of reverse psychology I could muster. And maybe just a little sarcasm.

"Voi, do you want to grow old in here?"

"Well the only thing we can do, is storm out and split up," I murmured. "I go left, you go right. Give me the wallet. It's reverse psychology. You look bigger and more experienced, so they'll go after you. I'll probably slip away easier. They don't know what our objective was, but they'll probably think it failed since we've done jack shit, so we should be able to shake them off. And we need a rendezvous point. Like...the airport."

He'd been listening with the occasional nod, but I couldn't ignore the slight frown etched on his face. "They'll be anticipating that," Squalo pointed out patiently. "And all the signs are in _Russian_. You didn't study the map either. I say we should stick together."

"I can speak a little Russian...how difficult could it be?"

"It's a Cyrillic alphabet! I highly doubt you can _read _it."

I smiled; one of my big cheerful ones. "Well then Squalo, if I die today, I'll die without regrets."

"Don't say that! You'll jinx yourself..."

*Overly serious face* "Exactly."

Squalo facepalmed. "Fine. Just take the bloody thing."

"Rendezvous, St. Petersburg, twenty minutes. Okay?" Grinning, I opened the door. Almost at one, an array of weapons flew at me. Twisting my body into some weird shape, I dodged the worst.

We split.

* * *

><p>It's strange how you always have these great ideas which turn out to be (as Xanxus would say it), trash. Only now do I realise something very important.<p>

I have absolutely no sense of direction. I don't know how a Cyrillic alphabet works. I don't like Russian weather. I could complain for hours, but in sole truth – I was lost.

There had been a team of five chasing after me; I'd managed to take out three of them, but the remaining were...emotional. And then there were two. We were in public, so I didn't exactly want to pull out a gun. So I resorted to a high stress game of hide and seek. _I'm part of this crowd, don't look, don't look...THEY LOOKED. THEY POINTED. OH SHIT. __  
><em>

Darting through the mass of people, I found I'd run into a railing. Panicked, I swung over it...and fell badly on snow and ice. _Argh! My foot! _I'd fallen over ten feet, and from my bearings...oh no. You see, the city of Moscow is named after the river. If I was a tourist, I'd probably go sightseeing, take a few pictures along it's edge, etcetera.

I just found the river.

Hearing voices above me, I pinned myself to the wall at the edge, which was fortunately angled weirdly enough for me to be out of range of attack. One of the assassins swore, and jumped down onto the ice. No, that wasn't right.

He jumped through the ice. And then there was one.

_Oh my actual fuck. Talk about choosing the wrong time to visit. _As a chain reaction of splintering ice took place, I was forced to move onto larger pieces of ice. It reminded me of what Squalo and I used to play - the floor is lava. In the process, I became a sitting duck for the remaining Giegue assassin. Figuring the public would already be in enough shock, I drew my pistol and fired. Correction: I tried to fire. My fingers were too numb with cold to respond. _...AH FUCKING DAMN IT._

The guy was saying something. Die. Fuck. Revenge. Friend. As he took careful aim, I threw my pistol at him, and hobbled away. Without the good use of both feet, balance was difficult. Swaying on thin ice, lacking sleep, food and warm clothing, was likely the reason I slipped, face-planted the ice, and fell into the slick water.

The moment my head went under, my brain froze. Quite literally, as a matter of fact. Sinking, I began to notice more details of my deathbed. Something splashed into the water above me. A school of fish swam away. I felt like I was floating in empty space. It was actually kind of peaceful. Serene.

Normally, I would say that my life flashed before my eyes – but it didn't. Instead, I saw a vision of sorts. A vision of the Varia in the midst of a violent coup d'état. It was the Vongola mansion – I recognised the architecture. The Varia was winning. I saw them all; Bel, Lussuria, Mammon, Levi, Squalo and Xanxus. But I didn't see myself.

Was it because I was going to die here?

* * *

><p>For those who haven't experienced this - it's always anti-climatic when you expect to die, and you wake up in your bed.<p>

"Forty point seven. Stubborn fever you got there. How do you feel, Serena?" Squalo's miserable voice floated to my ears. How rare.

"C-Cold. Actually, hot. More cold than hot, but stuffy. I don't know," I choked, going into a coughing fit.

"Well, I don't know what exactly, but you're sick," he murmured, jotting something down. "You're lucky you didn't get frostbite."

"You pulled me out of the water," I realised, squinting at a dim lamp.

"Someone had to do it right? Anyway, are you hungry? You've been out for almost two days," he gestured, lifting a bowl of what appeared to be lumpy potato.

"Um...appetising," I muttered; though my stomach growled contradictorily.

He sighed. "I know exactly how you feel. Your nose feels like drain. You can't feel gravity, your head feels like it's going to explode, and you think everything you eat is just gonna come back up."

"And you know this how...?"

Squalo shrugged. "Magic."

Suddenly, I remembered. "AHA HA HA HA! You hypocrite! You're always saying *ten times deeper voice* 'I'm so strong. I've got the perfect immune system'," I mimicked, but ended up coughing out my lungs again. "And then _you _got sick."

"VOI! I do not sound like that! But it was _your _fault. Remember THAT?" he shot back defensively. "It was a body fluke."

"Going to the playground was my idea, but going while it was hailing was yours," I pointed out, the memories distracting me from the discomfort.

He painted a mush moustache on my face. "VOI! It wasn't like that! You got us lost, and we had to go home while it was hailing!"

"...Yeah, that's probably true."

"I can't believe we remember all that crap," Squalo sighed, rubbing his eyes.

"Good times, good times."

"VOI! I was bedridden for _three _days!"

I chuckled. "That was the week I learnt Morse code from your sneezing."

"For crying out – VOI! I do NOT _sneeze _Morse code!" Squalo argued. "That's not even possible!" Stretching his arms above his head, he let out a large yawn, picked up the empty plate and turned to leave. "I've got a ton of paperwork to do. Rest."

"Uh...Squalo...could you uh..." I trailed off weakly, wondering how to phrase my question.

"Yeah?"

After a few awkward seconds, I blushed (well, my face was red anyway) and dismissed him. No. I couldn't ask him to stay. It was selfish. And childish. But Squalo pretty much read mind.

"I'll stay," he offered knowingly, sitting on the edge of my bed and ruffled my hair (man I hate it when he does that; I have long hair. _Long _hair). "Paperwork can wait."

"Then could you read me a book? Dyslexia's getting worse these days."

"Tch, sure. Which one?"

"That one there..."

Squalo walked over to my disorganized desk, picked up a huge textbook with small writing and read the front cover. "VOI! I'm not reading you this crap!"

I made a face. "Fine. Can you read me something else?"

"That's NOT a textbook?"

"Um...how about _Animal Farm_? I heard that's a pretty interesting book."

"It's not."

"_Lord of the flies_?"

"Really?!"

"All right. You'll definitely say yes to the next one. _Grim's fairytales_?"

"NO."

"But they're fairytales."

Squalo facepalmed. For the first time, Squalo wondered if he was a good role model. When he thought the words 'little girl', Serena didn't quite pop into his mind. Even his life had been brighter when he was her age.

"Why don't I tell you a story? Dad took me to watch a movie before I started school. I think it was called Mulan or something," he muttered, leaning on the bed frame.

"Is it a Disney princess film? I hate those. They always so perfect."

Squalo ignored me. "I think it went like this...there was once was a girl called Mulan, who lived in China. Her parents wanted to marry her off, coz that was her duty of something. But then these Mongolians attack China, and a guy has to be chosen from every household to fight. Mulan's dad was really old, so she went in his place. She trains, falls in love with the general, blah blah blah, she saves China."

*blink*

Squalo pouted. "VOI! What was wrong with it?"

"Um...nothing. Great story telling skills you got there, Squalo," I tried to say unsarcastically so he wouldn't be upset. Of course, it just turned out twice as sarcastic.

"Thanks." He frowned. "Wait. That was sarcasm wasn't it?"

*coughs innocently*

"I'm _summarising. _And compare it to the other Disney movies – they cry over guys, and she saves CHINA," Squalo said epically.

*blink*

"Whatever..." He ran a hand through his shaggy hair, and poked my cheek. It was something he'd always found entertaining. "Go to sleep. I'll be right here."

And that was the best sleep I'd had all year. No nightmares. By morning, I'd was more or less fine.

* * *

><p>Squalo made me rest for about a week, so I watched horror movies with Bel for a while (new fears: zombies, sharks, mummies, crop circles, that freaky moment when you look in the mirror and there's someone behind you, but you turn around and no one's there), helped Squalo with paperwork and tried to understand Xanxus.<p>

Here's what I got: Xanxus' main goal was to be the boss of the Vongola family. Fine. He'd already been chosen of five candidates to be the heir by the Vongola advisors by majority vote. So why did he want a coup d'état? It seemed pointless.

It was after another repetition of the coup d'état nightmare when I decided to take a nightly stroll. Normally I would've just snuck into Squalo's room, but he was out of the country. It wasn't that late, but all the rooms I walked past seemed eerily quiet.

I popped into the kitchen and drank a glass of water. Immediately afterwards, I wished I hadn't. Drinking the water woke me up, and instantly the shadows began to morph into distressing images – things with more than 4 legs, bizarre creatures with too little respect for hygiene, and things that didn't quite look alive.

_It's not real. It's just your imagination. _But despite the knowledge, I couldn't help looking over my shoulder. Trying to aim for a not-so-dark route to my room, I walked down a corridor I'd never explored. There was only one door. Curious, I got on my knees and tried to peek under the crack of the door - light was on. But before I could stand up again, the door creaked open and light splashed onto my face.

"Oi scum. What are you doing?" Xanxus' voice growled from behind his desk.

"I uh...was...um...sleep...walking," I tried to say from the floor.

"...Whatever," he murmured, going back to his paperwork. Was it paperwork? I couldn't be sure. According to Squalo's rants, he nearly never did any work. I noted how rare it was to see him without a glass of tequila in his hand. "How long are you going to sit there?"

I decided not to flip him off and then leave hastily. Instead, I dusted myself off, and was about to shut the door when I mustered up my courage. But the words that came from my mouth were not the ones that left my brain.

"Can I crash in your room tonight?" I literally slapped myself. _Crash in your room?! __FUCK NO. He's going to kill me. I don't even want to spend five minutes with him!_

"Whatever."

_I don't believe it. This has got to be some shit dream. What's his ulterior motive? Maybe he's drunk. Maybe I'm drunk. _Against my will, I walked in, slipped off my slippers and sat down on his bed. I was so nervous, I was shaking like crazy. I half expected him to suddenly get up, point his guns at me and yell 'OI SCUM! DIE TRASH!' or at least do something among those lines.

"Stop shaking, scum."

I froze, swallowing my fear. Instead, I gagged on spit. It was now or never. "What exactly are you going to do about the coup d'état?"

Xanxus didn't say anything. There was nothing but stupid ideas in his mind - making the mafia fat with obesity, training chickens into killer hawks.

"I had a dream. And..." I paused. Should I tell him? It sounded stupid.

"Continue, scum."

"I saw the Varia attacking the Vongola," I said quickly, letting out a deep breath afterwards. "At the main headquarters." It felt as if a large burden had been lifted off my conscience. I told him everything; who was where, how, what; and he seemed to be in deep thought even after I finished. But then he ignored me and acted as if I hadn't said a thing.

* * *

><p>The following day, he held a meeting. One of those 'you must attend, or you die' sort of things. I was almost late too; I was at school and had to sneak out of detention. I noted that only some of the higher ups were attending. He didn't wait for me to sit down before he started.<p>

"Exactly two months from now, the Varia will launch an attack on the Vongola estate."

There was a little whisper among the small group, and Xanxus shot the perpetrator. Dead silence. Quite literally.

"From this day forth, no one is to talk about this elsewhere."

More silence.

"Dismissed!"

"Sir, yes Sir!" everyone (excluding me) chanted.

Geez, and I had to rush for that? That was barely twenty words! At that moment, I couldn't help but stare at Xanxus. Copyright. He copyrighted my vision. His red eyes met with my own. _You got something to say trash? _I shook my head.

* * *

><p>And then, my final assessments came. Actually, assessment. There's only one.<p>

At mafia high, assessments were random. One year, they would be paper - the next, practical. That year, they forced everyone into a maze (age didn't matter) to complete random obstacles that you would occasionally come across. Each completed obstacle resulted in a set number of points. The school ranks depended on the points won.

Here's a list of what I had to do:

- Beat up the next person that comes by.  
>- Eat this poison without dying.<br>- Shoot a bullseye with one shot.  
>- How many types of potatoes are there?<br>- Does chocolate contain alcohol?  
>- Who was Trotsky?<br>- Why is human testing better than animal testing?  
>- Explain an illusion.<p>

Okay, so most of it was just bullshit. But the question that I lost on was this: 'what is love?'. I replied with 'love doesn't exist; it's a fucking expression Mafioso use to exploit others.'

What I really didn't get, was that I used the text book explanation. So how the hell did I get it wrong? I knew I'd scored well, since eating poison without dying was apparently difficult for others. Thank God I'd been friends with Bianchi at some point in my life. Annoyingly, they didn't release the ranks till the final day of the school year, so it was a tense wait.

* * *

><p>The last day of school was a nightmare from head to toe. The rankings and test results were listed in front of the principal's office, and hey – everyone wanted to see how they went right? Being small was a good thing; I managed to squeeze myself to the front of the mob, and started reading from tenth place to first.<p>

My name wasn't there. Slightly bothered, I trailed down lower. Eleventh. Twelfth. Thirteenth. My name. THIRTEEN.

Not in the top ten.

In which that meant I'd failed my deal with the Ninth.

It took me half an hour, standing there with a blank face to figure out that I was disappointed. No – beyond disappointed. I was pissed (it took another hour to figure out that one). I briefly considered hunting down everyone from first to twelfth and murdering them; but I dropped the idea when I passed the staff room.

"I can't believe how much the bribes were this year – twenty million. MILLION. And that was just twelfth place!" a teacher laughed.

*blink* _Bribes?_

"Meh, there's no price for reputation."

"If anything, I feel sorry for that kid - thirteenth place right? You gotta give her credit for being the only honest person in the top forty," another added sympathetically.

_Honest person? I'm honest? I've killed so many people in my life and I'm considered HONEST?_

"Oh – you mean Serena? She nearly never turns up for class, but she's never fallen asleep, aces her tests and her homework's always somehow on time. I really thought she would be at least a little higher on that list."

_Huh. I thought so too. So why exactly aren't I higher on that list?_

"Yeah well; bribes come first. I hate how she always gives textbook answers; it's so hard to find an excuse to say _why _she got dropped."

_Excuse? Telling me love is a fucking 'natural phenomenon' was actually a lie? I knew that was baloney!_

I'd heard enough. I kicked open the door, and pulled out my walking stick. "Great conversation! Now if you don't mind, I'd like my real ranking thanks," I growled, letting my anger take over.

"What are you talking about? But you could always..." a teacher rubbed his thumb and fingers together. The international sign for money. Bribing. I made a vow to never bribe or be bribed by anyone.

Without hesitation, I tripped him, and jabbed the tip of walking stick at his throat, pushing deeper and deeper. "Or you could give me that score so I DON'T have to put a price on your life," I offered/threatened.

"I – just – wait - can't – breathe - "

"I'm waiting."

"There's nothing you can do Serena; it's the mafia," the Ninth's voice trailed from the door. "Let the man go."

I let him go. After all, I was the Vongola's dog. What else could I do? Even if he told me to die, I'd had to do it. "Ninth. What a pleasant surprise," I hissed without bothering to keep the contempt out of my voice. "What brings you here?"

"Business; I'm presenting awards. It's a shame really, Serena," he smiled. "Better luck next time. Regrettably, our deal won't last until next time. I'm sorry."

And then I knew. That smile said EVERYTHING. He had known that the school was going to take in massive bribes; he had know that I would've been too honest to even consider cheating. He'd exploited my naivety. Finally, I opened my mouth. "You know, it's funny. Your face doesn't look it."

"Are you angry at me?" he teased in a possibly well-natured way. "I suppose you'd want to kill me."

"I do. But I won't." _Not now anyways, you fucking asshole. But in two days' time, you'll be the one who'll end up face down in a river...and if possible, I'll have the honors of killing you myself. I'm sure Xanxus wouldn't mind too much. He did say I could kill anyone I came across. I'll make sure I come across you!_

* * *

><p>Squalo figured there was something very wrong with Serena when she trudged back into Varia HQ. He did ask, but she slammed the door in his face. And when he broke it down, she moved her bed, two chairs, a sofa, TV and piano in front of the doorway. Even when he tried to break through her bulletproof window, she shut the blinds. He finally figured that it was just a girl thing. He hoped so anyway.<p>

* * *

><p>For the next few hours of that day, I bounced a tennis ball against a wall, drinking from a bottle of cheap whisky. Actually I think it was an anaesthetic for severe brain surgery; but I wasn't really bothered to read the label.<p>

Purpose. What was the purpose in my life? A tool? A toy? A hindrance?

* * *

><p><em>Downstairs...<em>

"Serena didn't turn up for dinner again. Is she studying?" Lussuria spoke, almost worried.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I bet she's sulking," Bel sniggered while throwing his knives leisurely at a dart board.

Squalo's head perked up. How would that sneaky prince know that?

"It's her birthday tomorrow. Maybe she's depressed because she isn't going to be paid for overtime," Mammon shrugged innocently.

"That's just you, Mammon," Lussuria tried to say nicely. "I'm sure it's something else."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...commander trash-shark doesn't know, does he?" Bel tormented. "How shameful; not knowing about his own - "

Squalo stood up, and pointed his sword between Bel's eyes. "Voi. What do you know?"

Bel giggled and leaned back casually on his chair. "No need to get all pushy. She just failed a contract or something with the Ninth."

"The Ninth? What contract?"

"How am I meant to know? It was some shit ranking thing or something..." Bel sniffed indignantly, obviously disliking the sword pointed at his face.

"VOI! I swear I'll cut you into pieces if you don't give me a straight answer!"

"Tch. I don't fucking know!"

Xanxus's eyes flashed open."Oi. Don't blame others for your incompetence, trash." Immediately, Bel and Squalo were quiet. "It's your fault you don't the reasons your sister even joined the Varia. She didn't study all that shit to be educated."

Squalo lowered his sword, bewildered. Sure he'd noticed her strange sudden attraction to her studies...but he'd never really asked why. Was he that bad a brother?

* * *

><p><em>In my room...<em>

I aimed the tennis ball badly, and it rolled underneath my bed. Partially worried that some weird creature would scare the crap out of me if I looked under it, I picked up a basketball and started bouncing it instead. Wow, it was nosier than I expected.

* * *

><p><em>Downstairs...<em>

Xanxus' eye twitched. There was this infuriating banging noise from the room above. Irksome. Lifting one pistol, he tried to pinpoint the area of din and shot. With the ceiling, a melted basketball fluttered to the ground. When the smoke cleared, Squalo saw Serena take a swig of some suspicious liquid.

Water and sewage started spurting uncontrollably from broken pipes. *ignores*

The piano slides into the hole and missed Xanxus by an inch. *ignores*

Flames erupt from an electricity fault. *ignores*

A talking potato on a flying unicorn floats around. *...possibly Serena's imagination*

A drop of water falls onto her head. "Oh? It's raining." Slipping off the bed, she walked/fell into a very large hole. Staggering in one direction, she accidentally dropped the bottle she'd been drinking from. It rolled over to Levi, who let out an unintelligent grunt.

"Warning, for dogs only," he murmured. "And you've actually been drinking this stuff?" *ignores*

"VOI! Serena! Where are you going?" Squalo called after her shoulder.

"A walk."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...hey dumbass, the coup d'état is in less than 24 hours. You'll miss it."

She grimaced, walking through a window by accident. "You know, Bel, I wouldn't miss it for the world!"

From his expression, she was pretty sure he didn't know.

* * *

><p><strong>THE MAFIA IS WATCHING YOU (-(-(-(-(-(-(-.-)-)-)-)-)-)-) Do you see it? <strong>**Oh, and the the recent chapters have been quite weird. I apologize. **

**Have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	15. The Coup D'etat

Chapter 15 - The Coup D'état

I sighed.

Having nowhere to turn to, I went to my school. My _school. _I couldn't even hope to express how lame and sad that was. Pushing open the door to Squalo and Dino's old room, something flew into my head. I cursed a rainbow, but I wasn't in the mood to pick a fight.

"Been drinking, Serena? This is a surprise. What brings you here?"

The innocent voice snapped me out of my momentary confusion. _YOU BASTARD _*cough* "Re - Reborn? You're...Dino-less." I looked at what had hit me. It was Leon – he looked sickly.

He shrugged. "Dino went on a date with a girl."

I snickered. "A date? He actually went on a date? And you're uh...not stalking him? Scratch that, you actually let him go?" I questioned suspiciously.

Reborn smirked twistedly in return. "What do you take me for Serena? I'm respecting his privacy." Inside, he felt slightly annoyed. Leon's tail fell off. Why would Leon drop it for no particular reason? Was Leon in poor health? Or was it a sign of sorts?

"The Irregolare family's been asking a few too many questions about the hobbies and habits of one particular young Cavallone boss. You've gotta have a pretty good reason not to be with him right now," I noted, dropping face first onto Dino's bed. _Sleeeepppp..._

Reborn frowned. Was it a joke? She was drunk after all. No; she was right. Leon could wait. He needed to find Dino. It was his responsibility as his tutor.

"Oi Serena. I want some espresso."

*scowls* "Now? It's like ten at night! And it just started _raining _if you didn't notice."

"I did notice. I want an espresso. Let's go to town."

"Reborn. There is no _let's_. It's just _you_," I reminded, pulling a pillow over my ears.

* * *

><p>Dino was in an uncomfortable position. Physically uncomfortable. And why? Well, there was one thing Dino never really fixed in his life. Nope, not his clumsiness. Or Reborn. Uh…let's just say anything mafia-related didn't count. It was simply:<p>

Fangirls.

He'd always been meaning to do something; sure, having fangirls meant that his face didn't crack a mirror and give him seven years bad luck, but lately, without Squalo, it was becoming too much of an issue. And the problem had almost tripled when it'd been formally announced that he would be the heir to the Cavallone. There were times when he spent more effort running from them than Reborn – and THAT was saying something.

It wasn't as if he didn't want a girlfriend or anything (all guys want one deep _deep_ down right?), it was more that many of the girls chasing him were just shallow. They either cared only for his appearance or influence. In fact, the girl beside him was no different.

"Oh my God – this place is like – the best – you know?" she babbled, flicking her hair behind her shoulder for the hundredth time.

"I um...wanted to tell you..." Dino trailed off. He was a loss for words. How was he meant to tell a girl that he thought she reminded him of a turkey should hurry up and find a dinner table? He'd already allowed her to drag him here after school, an expensive restaurant (he picked up the bill, obviously) and now he was stuck listening to her drabbles. In the rain, no less. But he just couldn't say it. He was too nice.

"Are you listening to me?" she smiled teasingly.

"Well, actually – "

Giggling, she leaned in on Dino, who in turn blushed rapidly and spurted out words that didn't quite go in a sentence.

* * *

><p>"You just couldn't wait for an espresso," I grumbled, handing Reborn a 711 coffee.

"This isn't quality espresso, Serena. This isn't even an _espresso_. This is cheap brown water."

I shot him a dirty look. "Well, it's express. Well then, next time, go find your own damn coffee while it's raining like shit at midnight."

"Language Serena." Reborn jumped on my head and took a sip of coffee. "Isn't that Dino over there?"

Dino? We were at a town square, and peering at the fountain in the centre...Reborn was right. Dino was trying to inch away from a girl. What was she trying to do with him? I couldn't really tell. _Maybe she's trying to assassinate him. _I immediately shook off the thought. _Nah, that's impossible. Reborn would've done a thorough background check. This just looks disturbing. Wait. This __is__ disturbing._

_DINO'S BEING VIOLATED. AND HE'S JUST GOING SIT THERE AND TAKE IT?!_

I grabbed Reborn's coffee and threw it across the square, missing my target by an inch...and accidentally hitting the girl. "Serena!" Dino exclaimed, confusion apparent; but his eyes just as clearly said 'my savior'.

"You...you crazy person!" the girl cried from the floor as I casually crashed their lonely party. "Help me Dino!"

"Let's leave..." Dino whispered desperately, grabbing my arm, his eyes darted back and forth. If I hadn't known the situation, I'd have thought he'd gone mad.

"C'mon Dino, you can't just leave her here," I pointed out, watching the girl who began to wallow in self-pity. "If you do, she might catch a cold and turn into a miserable corpse. That stuff looks terrible on a résumé."

_Résumé's? Corpses? WTF?_ "Have you been...drinking?!" he accused, looking me straight in the eye.

*sniffles* "Just a little. Let's just leave your girlfriend here then."

"She's not my girlfriend!" Dino complained indignantly.

"So...you're just taking advantage of her?"

*Facepalm* "All right, I'll take her home. Believe me, girls are just...so _clingy_."

"Dino, I'm a girl. I take offence."

"Not you! I mean like...all the good looking ones that have really nice exterior personalities..." He quickly stopped himself, seeing Serena's quizzing eye. "No no, I didn't mean _you_..."

"So you think I'm a guy who's ugly and not very nice. Gee thanks."

I stared around the town as Dino failed to say something positive. Up above, the town clock struck 12. _Happy birthday to me. I wonder if 8 will be a lucky year. _Lightning flashed, and by fate, I realized we weren't alone. A tiny red dot beside the clock shifted a little, and my mind raced. _Laser!__  
><em>

I had enemies, but I was sure I hadn't been followed. The girl was a nobody. _Dino _was actually a somebody. "Move!" I yelled, jumping up and pushing Dino to the side. BANG. A crack in the floor behind us appeared. Dino's 'female friend' screamed and fainted. Recovering from shock as I landed, I drew my pistol and shot quickly in the assassin's direction, and shortly, a body fell down and hit the floor with a dull thud.

Dino was in shock, arms waving in random directions. "What – who – how – you – gun - "

Reborn suddenly appeared to our side. "It's the Irregolare family. They're here to assassinate you, Dino." _He dropped the 'pipsqueak' and walked voluntarily into the rain. Things must really be bad..._

"Eh? Me? What did I do?! Are you sure?"

I hadn't exactly expected too much trouble on a short trip, so my gun had only been half-filled to begin with. Reborn usually relied on Leon, so I didn't know if he had anything else up his sleeve_._ Before I could contemplate more on the matter, I dropped to one knee involuntarily. "What the - "

"Serena! What...you...?" Dino trailed off, staring at my waist, as if I'd suddenly gained a few too many pounds.

Looking down as well, my skin crawled. _This...this is my first gunshot wound. It feels so...cold. _Reborn jumped from Dino's head and examined me for a few seconds. "You're going into shock. Put some pressure on that, we're going to have to run."

Obeying somewhat grudgingly, I sighed shakily. _This can't get any worse, can it? _As if on cue, men dressed in black with guns came running into the square. Dino kept a straight face, but I could feel his panic.

"Reborn. What do we do?"

"I can't help. The Irregolare family is on the verge of a war with the Vongola." The men were slow to spot us because of the rain, but we only had seconds to make a decision.

Pushing Dino's worried hands away, I shakily stood up, blinking rainwater out of my eyes. It was getting difficult to breathe. "I'll...draw their attention. The two of you...should leave."

"I'm not leaving you here!" Dino hissed, grabbing my wrist. "This isn't even your fight! Go with Reborn, get the hell out of here!"

"You jump, I jump!"

"Now's not the time to quote Titanic!"

Lights suddenly sprang up from all directions, and we were all momentarily blinded.

"There they are!"

Before I regained my sight, I coughed up blood, and my gun cluttered to the floor. I heard it being picked up, and I assumed it was Dino.

"Ha ha! Do you think a gun will save you, brat? You don't have the will to take a life!"

A gunshot echoed in the square, and I couldn't help but flinch as I heard Dino cry out in pain. "Dino!"

"I-I'm fine, Serena," Dino murmured, so only I could hear. "We can talk!" he declared. "There's no need for violence!"

"HA! You can eat shit for all I care, Dino Cavallone! Yesterday you Cavallone fuckers killed my son, today you can taste the same pain!"

"The Cavallone family would do nothing of the sort!" I yelled back, finally able to see the pain in Dino's eyes. About thirty men were in the square, surrounding us in a wide circle. The one doing the talking looked somewhat familiar. _Yesterday... _"Your son died at 2:47AM, yesterday, outside a nightclub, from three bullets to the chest, didn't he?"

The slightly senile man glared. "And how does a child with one foot in the grave know that?"

"Because I killed him." I forced a sadistic smile.

"Serena, stop," Dino muttered urgently.

"He squealed like a little girl!" _I never thought reading a newspaper could be this handy._

The boss of the Irregolare family had a moment of truth. "Everyone," he said, addressing the thirty or so men he'd brought along, "aim for the girl."

"NO!" Leon glowed so brightly, all the attention on me was transferred. With some of the adrenaline gone, I collapsed, barely conscious. Squinting at Dino, I saw he had a whip in hand and had thrown something towards the men. I could've sworn...it was a turtle.

Dino charged forward

At that instant, he didn't care that he didn't know how to use a whip. He didn't care that he was a clumsy idiot. Because for the first time in his life, he had something he wanted to protect.

* * *

><p>There were not many things that Dino did not find terrifying. And for some reason, charging at a group of armed men was no longer applied to that category.<p>

On the other hand, an angry _or_ a happy Reborn was just plain scary. And an angry Squalo. He'd spent enough of his life watching Squalo hack up dummies to know he did NOT want to be on the other side of his sword.

So he knew, without a doubt, that Squalo would kill him when he arrived at the hospital.

He sat by Serena, staring.

*flashback*

_Dino ran somewhat aimlessly through the pouring rain, carrying Serena on his back. "Hang on, we're almost there," he insisted more to himself, slightly out of breath. "We're almost there." _

_"Dino, you're bleeding?"_

_She was conscious. Dino laughed lightly. "Ha ha, don't worry, just a scratch."_

_"You're a great friend," she murmured, tired. "Be who you want to be. Do what you want to do. Don't let anyone bring you down. Okay?"_

_Was...was she saying goodbye? __"Please don't go...!" _

_"There's the ambulance," Reborn cut in, pointing to the flashing lights._

*end flashback*

"Dino."

It was Squalo. The first thing Dino noted was that he looked just as tired and worn out as himself. And yeah, his hair was a bit longer too.

He swallowed. "Look, Squalo, I can expl- "

"VOI! I don't want to hear anything from you!" Squalo yelled, and Dino flinched. Reborn listened grimly from outside the door. Squalo glanced at his sister for a moment.

"I – I'm sorry. I really just - "

Squalo walked in front of him, and grabbed him by the front of his shirt. It was covered with his own as well as Serena's blood. "Look. I've only got one sister in this entire universe; and I'd prefer it if she wasn't a slut, permanently disabled, mentally insane, or dead. I was the screw-up brother, so you gotta be the good, positive influence. You got that?"

Dino was shocked, but nodded his head slowly. Squalo let go of his shirt.

"You should get some sleep, _Haneuma _(bucking bronco). You look tired."

"So do you."

* * *

><p>I like shock - it's wonderful. For example, you can have a hole right through your gut, and barely feel a thing. So I don't get why everyone says 'she's going into shock' in such a concerned manner, when leaving shock is clearly much worse.<p>

And that's pretty much all I was thinking as I came to in misery on a hospital bed.

A clock on the wall ticked by; seconds, minutes, hours closer till my deadline. _ I can't just watch idly and wallow in self-pity! _Before anyone could realise I was conscious, I decided I was well enough to leave.

I wasn't.

But with utter determination, I managed to sit up without the help of the electronic bed fold thing. Two hours later, I had only made it to the hospital's car park - exhausted, sore, and ironically dressed in a doctor's outfit.

No one would save the Ninth today.

* * *

><p>Levi strutted through the courtyard of the Vongola mansion, scowling at the overly grown ants crawling around in panic. "Levi Volta!" The smell of burning flesh was so reassuring.<p>

Without warning, a car sped through the gardens, and crashed right into the wall of the main building. There...there had been no one behind the wheel.

_What...the fuck. _

Before Levi could fry the car, the driver's door fell off, and a tiny girl casually stepped out, stretching as if she'd just had an afternoon nap. "Oh. Hello Levi."

"Y-You!" _She's not in a hospital?_

Serena walked over to one of his victims and put on a borrowed pair oversized sunglasses. "You wouldn't happen to know where the Ninth is, would you?"

"How am I meant to know? Go find him yourself," Levi grunted looking away. _She's...she's a__ monster..._

* * *

><p><em>~Ushi shi shi shi~...I wonder what that noise just was...<em>

Bel sauntered through a maze of corridors with a sly grin as he spotted a group of terrified men run around a corner. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...I love hide and seek."

Quite suddenly, metallic barriers stretching from the ceiling to the ground slid down, dividing the corridor in portions. He found himself in his own little space. _They think this can stop me? Foolish peasants!_

He slashed through the barriers like butter, and murdered the cowards on the other side. Pleased with his handiwork, he was surprised as the divider in front of him opened to reveal...Serena. Her white coat had been splattered with blood - for once, not her own. He could make out a lengthy trail of bodies in her wake.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...isn't this a surprise visit, dumbass. No mercy today?"

"They're just unconscious," Serena growled, glaring right through him.

"Hm. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're in a bad mood right now."

She ignored his comment. They'd come to an intersection - meaning there were four directions to travel. She'd come from one. He'd come from another. "The Ninth. Where?"

In response, Bel shook his head silently. "I'm going right." From the way she glared - Bell could tell. This wasn't the every day dumbass he'd been able to dominate. Her eyes...were cold_. _"You should stay here," he found himself muttering, his concern surprising even himself.

Serena walked slowly towards to the barrier on his left, and briefly studied the crack where the wall and metal met. Seeing something he couldn't, she slid an average looking ID card between the two, and the thick metal barrier raised slowly, disappearing into the ceiling.

"Someone's coming!" the voices on the other side exclaimed, and Bel could hear clink of a gun.

Bel kicked over an uzi from a fallen Vongola troop. "Oi dumbass. Take it."

"What makes you think I need a gun?"

* * *

><p>Before long, I reached a dead end. The pain in my side had steadily begun to increase with each step, as did the throb in my head. Words formed in my mind, but I couldn't make any sense from them. <em><br>_

_Carpaccio...to the left..._

Carpaccio was a meat dish. I didn't quite see the relevance.

Both sides of the corridor were lined with paintings - looking to my left, I noticed some pretty expensive works that had 'been lost to time'. In fact, there was only one I didn't recognise - and this was coming from somebody who knew jack shit about art.

Maybe there was a secret message? Or a hidden detail? After about a minute, I could safely conclude it was just an ugly painting. Irritably, I raised a foot, and kicked the painting, planning to stamp a dirty footprint. Instead, my foot went right through the painting - there was no wall behind it. _Bingo._

Ripping the painting off the wall, I climbed through a small hole in the wall. Rather unfortunately, my side nicked the crude edge of the hole, and I could feel a warm trickle blood from my most recent wound soak through the bandages. _Oh well, there go the stitches. _

The other side was rather dark - but I could see the floor was tiled with green, white and red. My head throbbed angrily with two words.

_Red...tiles..._

Deciding if I did otherwise, my brain would self-destruct or something, I hopped from one red tile to other. After about a hundred feet, the tiled pattern ended, bringing me to a tight circular room with seven large paintings on the wall. The only common link between them all...well, the weather. A hurricane, the sun, rain, mist, clouds, lightning and a clear sky. _What the fuck is with these people and paintings? _

Tapping each of the paintings, there was only one that stood out - the one with the clear sky had a wooden backing. As I tried to remove it from the wall, there was a soft click, and it swung open like a door.

"_I didn't think you'd put up this much of a fight. Old man!" _Xanxus' voice rang throughout the large room, and a flash of his flames illuminated the room for a moment. A pillar in the basement crumbled. The guy did realize that that was the only thing holding up the ceiling right?

And then I saw him.

Walking absent-mindedly forward, the world around me was but a backdrop. The limits of my body had been reached, but I was so infuriatingly close. _Screw blood. I don't need it to kill him!_

"Serena!"

The yell finally reached my ears, and I followed the sound to Squalo, leaning on one of the no-so-ruined pillars. "Serena..." Squalo choked out, in pain. Although he tried to hide them, I envision the depth of his burns. Abruptly, his aura completely changed. "VOI! What the fuck are you doing here?! You should be in a hospital!"

I held his concerned gaze for another second, before continuing forward. The battle between the Ninth and Xanxus raged on.

_"Iemitsu asked me not to kill you. However, after this much carnage...as boss, I cannot let you live. It'll end by my hand."_

Xanxus laughed back maniacally. _"You're finally showing you're true nature. I must've been an eyesore to you. Now you're desire is about to come true! Can you kill me? Kill me if you can! You're the one who's going to die!"_

For a flash, the Ninth looked sad, and almost human. _"Why? Why are you..?"_

"_Shut up! You know that better than anyone else! I'm not..._*drum roll* _I'm not your real child! Why did you keep quiet about it, the fact that I couldn't become the boss of the Vongola?"_

Oh wow. I don't think anyone was expecting that (that is, if you exclude me, coz I'd had a dream about that). I resisted the urge to yell out that I was right. I'd never ever _imagined_ Xanxus to be such...an emotional guy.

"_Die, old man!"_

"_I just can't...i'm sorry everyone…."_

I could see the Ninth clearly now. Picking up one of Xanxus' abandoned guns on the floor (ignoring that it was unusually light), I took aim. For a moment, the world seemed to pause. Xanxus was getting frozen, Squalo was slowly passing out in pain, and the Ninth was perfectly still. I pulled the trigger.

...Nothing. I tried over and over, but it just clicked empty time after time. Fuck. FUCK. _You slut whore! You – you fricking ass – wipe – shithole – ass crack! _I threw the empty gun at the Ninth.

I missed.

Dropping the gun, and charging forward, something grabbed me by the collar, and slammed me into the nearest pillar like a rag doll. Groaning, I saw Squalo engaging in battle with a mop of blond hair. Instinctively, my objective changed. DIE BLOND HAIRED ONE.

The guy had a smug look on his face as I aimed a kick for his head. Because my foot never made contact with that smug face of his. Then again, that was only because Squalo's fist smashed through it first.

"Serena…stop," Squalo instructured, out of breath, half doubled over.

Facing the Ninth, I could barely get the words out. "Are you shitting me? We can end this!"

Squalo's iron grip on my shoulder held me back. "It's over! Xanxus is _dead_! There's no point! Just - "

Before I could break free, someone shoved my face to the floor. You know, I'd never really wanted to know what burnt cement tasted like. Squalo's voice blurred, and my vision pixelated. _It's not...over..._

* * *

><p>I'd only just partially regained consciousness when Squalo's voice flowed through my ears. "VOI! You're not guilty!"<p>

_How...am I moving forward? _Raising my head just in time to Squalo being pulled along by guards wrapped in ragged bandages, cloaks and tattered top hats, my blood (if it was even possible) ran even colder. The was only one thing on earth that even partially fitted that description. Vindice.

"What t'is all 'bout?" I muttered, completely groggy. But he'd disappeared into thin air.

Shaking my head, it became apparent that I was in my own boat of trouble. Two armed men in suits were dragging me along the floor - my hands were handcuffed behind my back. The world I should've known so well seemed all too foreign.

The two men more or less tossed me into a seemingly bare, dimly lit room, and door shut with a solid clang behind me. Just as I began to adjust to the lighting, bright lights sprang on, blinding me.

"Well, this is the last one isn't it?" a bored voice came from above.

"Last one. Let's hurry up and get this one over with; I don't want to be home late," one of them yawned.

I'd lost my contact lenses ages ago, so I had to squint in the light to make out some of their faces. Ever seen weird T.V shows in law courts? Well this was just like that. Except there were a whole lot of judges, and no lawyer. The Ninth, Iemitsu (I remembered the damn guy's name now) and about five other senile looking men stared at me.

"Serena di Squalo, did you or did you not break into the Vongola HQ?"

Getting to my feet firmly, I forced myself to focus. _Squalo wants me to say no. But I did kinda break in...who gives? These people aren't even taking this seriously. _"Maybe, maybe not," I answered with an all too sweet smile. A guard I hadn't noticed emerged from the shadows and aimed a nice kick at my ribs.

"I'll repeat the question: did you, or did you not break into the Vongola HQ?"

"Up yours, motherfucker," I cursed angrily, managing to remain balanced on my feet.

Another kick to my ribs.

"Look here kid, I'm losing my patience. Answer the question!"

"You obviously never had any to start with, imbecile," I pointed out innocently.

*Kick*. Ouch. I felt that one.

"I can't take this brat any more! Just let the Vindice take her already!" the man bellowed.

"Please, I'm sure she means no harm," the Ninth cut in. "I'll take it from here." The man shut up immediately.

"Serena, did you come here with the Varia?"

"No." A few whispers were exchanged. Shifting my position noisily on the floor, I forced myself to continue with a sadistic smile. "Actually, if you must know, I came here on my own accord. I'd smash a car into the Vongola HQ any day! Personally, I would've liked to kill you too, but the gun I picked up was empty. A shame, really."

*Kick*. ...My ribs were definitely broken at this point.

The Ninth rubbed his eyes, and I noted they were slightly red-rimmed. "The remainder of the Varia have been judged to be guilty. You, on the other hand, may be able to have a lighter punishment. So please Serena, cooperate. Do you plead guilty, or not guilty for being part of the coup d'état against me?"

Ah. The big question. Squalo told me to say not guilty. I could more or less guarantee the Varia had been sentenced to death. The guilt, pain and frustration built up. "Guilty."

"Guilty? You don't appear to have the same goal as the Varia. You haven't killed a single person today - you knew the gun you pointed at me was empty - in fact, the worst crime you've committed is property damage. What are your reasons?" the Ninth asked, bemused.

"Why should I tell you, fucktard? You're a good for nothing bastard who doesn't care for the welfare of anyone," I grumbled. No sooner had I uttered the last syllable, I jumped up, tucking my knees to my chest, and swung my arms underneath me so that they were in front of me. I landed in a crouch as the guy stepped forward to kick me, pulled his foot towards me, and grabbed the handgun at his hip, pointing it straight at the Ninth. Within a second, every other weapon in the room was pointed at me.

"Don't be foolish, Serena," the Ninth sighed. "This isn't going to end well."

Tch. We'll see about that. "Y'all better not shoot me, or I'm gonna cap that bastard's brains!" I ordered. "Oh, and if you kill me, my last move's gonna be the death of your precious Ninth," I added as an afterthought.

"How dare you!" someone barked. "Drop your weapon immediately!"

"Yeah – NO. Tell you what; let's make a deal. Change the Varia's sentence, and I won't kill the Ninth. How 'bout that?" I suggested casually.

Another official spoke up. "No! That is - "

"- what you must do if you want the Ninth to survive," I almost said sadly. "Think about it logically. Xanxus is out of the picture, and there are four candidates you haven't even considered. No offence, but they suck in comparison. The oldest is like what; eighteen? Then again, you could just pick Iemitsu's son who hasn't even hit puberty."

Iemitsu looked like he was about to jump at me. "How do you know about my son?" he hollered, and it took three people to restrain him.

"Call it a hunch. Vision. Thought. Whatever helps you sleep at night," I said coolly, guns still pointed at the Ninth.

"You know I can't do that Serena," the Ninth said calmly as if we were just sitting casually in a park, surrounded by pigeons instead of guns. "I would, on the other hand, accept a fair trade."

"Fair trade?" I mocked, laughing. "It's ironic for me to say this, but GROW THE FUCK UP. This is the mafia! Don't think you can get away with shit like that anymore."

"Then what exactly do you want?"

"Sign an official agreement with me. The Varia operates as your assassination squad as per usual, and you can do whatever you want with me."

"And why would we want you?" an official snickered. "You're just a short tempered kid!"

"_Correction_: I'm a short tempered kid who currently has the life of your Ninth in my hands." That shut him up.

"All right then; I'll agree, if you tell me why you're pleading guilty," the Ninth muttered, scribbling something down. "This'll take a while anyway."

I rolled my eyes. "I had a vision."

"Don't fuck with us, kid!" some guy yelled angrily. _Nobody's taking me seriously. Maybe I should make up a lie?_

"What of, exactly?" Iemitsu asked, suddenly interested (and in a mood that wasn't something like 'I'LL KILL YOU'). _The guy actually believes me?_

"The Varia attacking the Vongola HQ. I eventually told Xanxus, and the next day: SURPRISE! Let's attack the Vongola!" I exclaimed, trying to keep the sarcasm out. "His plan was more or less what I told him, so…I suppose I should take the blame. And technically speaking, everybody in the Varia just did what he told them to. Except for me, of course."

Someone laughed. "You actually want us to believe that? A vision? That ridiculous!"

*sigh* I knew this would happen. "That's the truth, and nothing but the truth. Believe what you want."

The Ninth threw over a scroll of paper, and I caught it with one hand. "Women are better than men at multi-tasking, so don't think I'll get distracted," I muttered, skimming down the page. Blah blah blah, yep. The Ninth's official dying will flame glowed a brilliant orange at the bottom of the page. No problem. I dropped the gun, kicking it away. I sat on the floor, unable to retain my balance. "All right, you can kill me now. Take me to Vindice, murder me, mock trial, whatever makes you happy," I announced.

"You don't care?" the Ninth questioned.

"Should I?" I muttered. _Worst birthday EVER, _I thought ominously as I passed out.

"Boss, should we shoot her?" a guard asked.

The Ninth and Iemitsu walked leisurely downstairs and observed Serena. "You know Ninth, this is embarrassing. To think we were being ordered around by a weak little kid like her..." Iemitsu opened her coat to check for weapons. A blood soaked shirt stared him back in the face.

The Ninth and Iemitsu shared a look, and nodded in unison. "Get a medic," Iemitsu ordered. "And get me her file." It was a waste to throw away a perfect pawn.

* * *

><p><em>Some time later...<em>

I heard afterwards that I was unconscious for literally a week. In that time, the Vongola HQ was repaired; the Varia narrowly missed an execution, the coup d'état became the 'crib incident', and Xanxus' status as an ice cube was hushed up. The decisions for my future were also made. Actually, I was awake for that part.

"VOI! Why should I agree to this crap? Are you out of your fucking mind?" Squalo's voice roared, and I stirred.

"She made a deal, Squalo. There's nothing you can do," the Ninth's voice trailed over.

"VOI! I'm her legal guardian! That deal should be invalid!"

"If it was invalid, you and the rest of the Varia will be executed immediately. Would you be okay with that?"

My eyes shot open. "No! Listen to the retard, Squalo."

"Serena..." Squalo murmured, somewhat relieved. He recalled the situation. "WHY? YOU'RE SO STUPID. WHAT THE FUCKING HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? IS THERE SOMETHING THAT COMPELS YOU TO BE SUCH A MOTHERFUCKING LITTLE SHIT?"

"I DIDN'T WANT YOU TO DIE," I yelled in return, feeling the strain from my injuries.

"I DON'T MATTER. YOU MATTER!"

"WELL I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE, OKAY? WHY AM I EVEN ALIVE?"

"BECAUSE YOU ARE."

"THAT'S NOT A FUCKING ANSWER."

"YES IT IS."

Iemitsu stepped out from the shadows in the corner, and cleared his throat unnecessarily. "CEDEF will take custody of Serena di Squalo, and I will be the legal guardian."

I gagged. Him? Nah. This definitely wasn't real. Definitely a dream. This couldn't be happening. To be honest, at that moment, I kind of lost it. Ripping off IV drips, heart rate monitors and other medical appliances, I jumped out the window and into the night rain.

"Serena! This is the fourth floor!" Squalo called hopelessly, battling the pain of his own injuries.

"I think she took that well," the Ninth murmured. "I'll go get her."

"VOI! I'm the brother!" Squalo yelled, jumping out the window after her.

"They do know that there's a perfectly good lift down the hall right?" Iemitsu sighed, watching their figures disappear through the rain.

* * *

><p>I was wheezing when I stopped to catch my breath. I sat down at a bench in a small park, letting the rain calm my senses.<p>

Split up from Squalo. It came in front of all the spiders, supernatural crap and even death. When my parents died, I'd been worried about that too. I mean, you always hear stories of siblings being split up between foster families right?

I'd always known that the day would come. But nothing could've prepared me for it.

A relatively warm jacket was thrown over me. "Do you really want to catch a cold that much?" Squalo sighed, walking to me with an umbrella.

* * *

><p><em>Across the road...<em>

Squalo put down a tray filled with...well, junk. "So uh, let's eat." We weren't exactly fond of eating fast food. Still, when you hadn't eaten for ages, your taste buds weren't picky.

Poking at my chips, I wound up the toy that came with my meal, watching it move across the table. "Got any plans for the future? I mean like, other than assassinating people."

"I always wanted to go to Asia," Squalo admitted. "Learn new sword techniques and stuff. What about you?"

I shrugged. "There was never really anything."

"So...you never wanted to be a – a barbie? Or I dunno, a lawyer? Doctor? Pilot?"

Pulling a face, I shook my head frantically. "God no. For the barbie anyways. I mean, Mom and Dad were always talking about mafia business. I just figured I'd go along with the crowd you know?" I muttered. "And then you joined the Varia, so I thought 'how bad could it be? At least I won't suffer alone'."

"Part of the crowd huh?" Squalo sighed, pointing at himself. "You got a pretty bad crowd to follow."

I slumped in my chair, til my eyes were level with the table. "Well; beat's being alone."

Squalo stared into my eyes. "Really? What if you went to school, had friends your age? You could've had a crush or – I don't know. Maybe now you might get a chance to live...normally."

_Why does he have to push me away? _Grimacing, I studied at the supernatural smile of the toy for a little longer. It was the same smile people had when they lied. "Yeah, I suppose so."

* * *

><p>When I was finally released from the hospital a fortnight later, Iemitsu allowed me to visit the Varia one last time.<p>

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...it was nice knowing you, dumbass," Bel murmured, dejected smile on his face.

"Right back at you," I sighed, remembering the day he kinda kidnapped me. "I'll still remember you as a phony prince. Just for the hell of it."

"I am not a phony prince!"

"Serena!" Lussuria sniffled, crashing into me with a hug. "Don't forget to send lots of letters!"

The driver (last count his name Turmeric or something) cleared his throat. "Um actually, no contact at all will be allowed. Emails, telephone calls, postcards, a mile radius distance..."

"Spoilsport..." Lussuria muttered, as if that was the worst insult he could think of. "Here, I got you something." He handed over a nicely wrapped box.

Levi grunted. We shook hands. That was the first time I actually interacted with the guy.

Mammon gave me a kid's guide to magic. I could see someone else's name covered with white out, but it's the thought that counts. "Lal Mirch isn't a bad person. She's tough, but she's nice," Mammon told me, completely out of the blue. "Trust her."

And then came the moment I'd dreaded most. As he hugged me, I tried to remember the smell of his hair, his eye color (#536878 ), the pitch of his VOI!'s, and pretty much anything that made Squalo well...Squalo.

"I packed you uh...a suitcase."

"Thanks."

It was actually pretty awkward. But I refused to say it. Goodbye. Because this was _not_ the end. I _would _find a way to outsmart Vindice, even though it seemed impossible. I mean, they called the Vongola HQ impregnable right?

"I'll see you soon Squalo," I finally said, my fingers clenching into a fist. "Sorry if I make you wait a while."

He gave a confident smile in return. "Then I'll wait for you."

Reluctantly, I let go and got into the car, ignoring Iemitsu in the seat beside me. As the engine started, I looked back one last time at the Varia. Squalo half waved. As soon as the car turned out of the gate, I dropped the smile and started banging my head on the window. I was an idiot of mass proportions.

Iemitsu gave a small smile. "Tough, isn't it? Saying goodbye?"

"Shut up," I choked. My eyes were watering. "It's not goodbye."

* * *

><p>A week later, Squalo walked around the Varia mansion almost sadly.<p>

"She was a good kid – a bit violent, but she was polite. And she always made her bed," a maid sighed in the laundry room.

"Mmm. It's hard to find kids like that these days. Computer games, you know?" another replied.

Walking into the living room, he saw Lussuria moving around ecstatically. Not a very good sign. "VOI! Lussuria! What are you doing? You'd better not be trying to get us to help you paint the bathrooms pink," he threatened.

"Aw Squ-chan! Don't be like that. Pink would look lovely with the tiles."

"Squ-chan? VOOOIII! Don't call me that!" Squalo yelled back.

"Anyways, that's not what I wanted to talk about. Look what I found!" Lussuria exclaimed, holding up a few scrunched up pieces of paper.

"Trash?" Bel guessed dismally.

"Of course not! Would I be waving trash around? This is Serena's English essay!"

"VOI! Give me that!" Squalo grumbled, but Bel got to it first.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...let's see what dumbass has to say."

_My will._

_Well well well, if you're reading this, you're either my English teacher, or an unbelievably dedicated idiot. Since I don't have much family or shit to give, just be happy with whatever you get._

_To Bel: I've always considered you partially like a brother. Of course, completely mentally deranged and oddly bloodthirsty. I suppose if I ever deceased, you can have my play station console. Oh, and I found a copy of that horror movie they banned in fifty-four countries. It's really disturbing; just your type._

_To Mammon: There was a time when I thought you were an evil demon child, who only cared about money. Today, I see you as a demon child with an eccentric love for money - but a mostly decent human being. There's a difference. Half my money from my bank account goes to you. Enjoy it. I'm sure you'll find something to do with it._

_To Levi: You're pretty much like the perverted uncle everybody is embarrassed about at a family reunion. I have an old laptop with a really bad virus. It automatically opens every porn site that has a similar name to whatever I search. I'm sure you'll have fun with it. Password's 'not telling'. All capitals, one space. Don't worry, it's fool proof._

_To Lussuria: I suppose I should say thanks. You were like a second aunt. Anyways, I was hacking something for a school project, and I got a lot of addresses of hot guys with abs. I thought you might like that._

_To Squalo: You were the only thing that kept me grounded to this stupid life, so I'm glad I outlived you. I'm sure you'll have fun without me in your life. Thanks for everything._

_You can have everything else that I own. Most of it does have a lot of value, and if you sold it altogether on eBay, it's worth about a million dollars. And the other half of my bank account is worth quite a bit. I don't mind if you burn it all though._

_Oh, and the only thing I ask is that you cremate me and scatter my ashes on the Varia grounds. And get a dog, and name it Xanxus. Coz, since we're dogs of the Vongola, he can be a dog of the Varia._

"Isn't that sweet?" Lussuria sighed dreamily.

"You know, I kinda wish she did die," Mammon mused.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I'm collecting my inheritance anyways," Bel snickered, breaking into a run.

"Oi Bel! Don't touch my inheritance!" Levi called, running after him.

Squalo sighed. He felt like killing someone.

* * *

><p><strong>Oh no! Don't worry, it's not the end. But the KHR plot is going to start to weave into this...slowly.<strong>

**Anyways, have a nice day, ciao ~ :]**


	16. Days, Weeks, Months, Years

**There's not much you can say about the seven-ish years between the crib incident and the beginning of the KHR plot...so I wanted to get most of it out of the way in one chapter. It's pretty long, feel free to skip it.**

**Time is really messed up; it revolves around Serena's birthdays.**

**Please enjoy :]**

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 16 - Days, Weeks, Months, Years<span>

There's nothing like a good old lecture for a welcome. I didn't trust CEDEF from the moment I heard its full name (Consulenza Esterna Della Famiglia). How could you possibly trust anything with such a long name? I bet that's how they keep themselves a secret organization. You ask where they're from, and they mess up your mind with so many syllables.

"So, welcome to CEDEF, Serena," Iemitsu welcomed once we'd gotten to his office. "What do you think?"

It'd only been an hour, but the depression had already sunk in. "That stupid face doesn't suit you, Iemitsu. It probably disappoints your subordinates."

Shrugging, he became serious. "Now, I'm going to tell you this once, and only once. From this day forth, you are not allowed any contact with the Varia. Understood?"

"If I say no, do I still get to contact them?"

He ignored me. "If you breach this rule, the Varia will be taken to Vindice."

"Oh gee, logical."

*Ignore* "You'll be staying, living and working with CEDEF from now forth. You can keep your title of a Varia Officer. All your work comes and goes through me. Attack or kill anyone without my word - the Varia will go to Vindice."

"So you're blackmailing me now?"

*Ignore* "If you run away, commit suicide or die from whatever cause, the Varia will go to Vindice."

"How convenient, I'm immortal."

"And finally, you must wear this." Iemitsu opened a desk drawer, and threw over a watch.

For a moment, I glanced suspiciously at the contraption, tapping at the glass face. I put it back on his desk. "I afraid I'd have to decline. I've already got a watch."

Iemitsu went on with his lecture. "If you don't wear it or take it off, the Varia will - "

"I got it, I got it!" I exclaimed, putting it on immediately. "What's with this thing? It's so fat. Let me guess. A tracker?"

"It has a tracker - but there's another feature..." Iemitsu trailed off, foraging through his drawer. "Ahh, found it." He pulled out a controller with a single red button on it. "This goes with it. You keep the watch, I keep this."

I panicked in silence. It looked like something used to detonate a bomb.

"Now, if you do something unsatisfactory, it does this." *Presses button*

*ZAP* I scrambled to my feet. "Ow! Did you just _electrocute_ me? You fucking *ZAP* bastard *ZAP*!" I swore. Well wasn't that a surprise.

"If your swear, it'll zap you. If you're somewhere you're not meant to be, it'll zap you. If you're rude, uncooperative, lazy or do something wrong, I'll zap you. Oh, and if you try to take it off, it'll explode," he added as if it wasn't a big deal.

"Far out! *ZAP*Oh, so I can't even say 'far out'? *ZAP* It's not even derogatory in any possible way!" I accused. "What if I wanted to say far out *ZAP* in the ocean?"

Iemitsu snickered. "And how many times does 'far out in the ocean' pop up in a conversation?"

I hate this watch. Screw that. I hate Iemitsu more.

* * *

><p>The remainder of that day was worse than I'd imagined. Iemitsu introduced me to his most trusted co-workers: Basil, Oregano, Turmeric and Lal Mirch. Herb garden, anyone? Basil was about my age, but he was ten times more energetic. He almost ripped off my arm with his handshake.<p>

"My name's Basil!"

"Um...Serena. Hi."

"I hope we can be great friends, Serena-dono!" he grinned. _Dono? Isn't that a really outdated honorific for guys? In JAPAN?!_

I'd met Turmeric in the car, and he wasn't a bad guy. Oregano was nice. She reminded me of Lussuria – though notably less theatrical. Lal Mirch on the other hand didn't offer any greeting, give any gesture, smoke weed; she just stared.

A Lal Mirch stare is a hundred times worse that any other stare. That's partially because she looks at you as if trying to dissect you mentally, while you're still alive without the courtesy of painkillers.

I cleared my throat and decided to say something. "So um...it's been a while huh?"

"You've met before?" Iemitsu asked, mildly surprised.

*Stares*

"We've met," I finally answered, hastily breaking eye contact with her.

Iemitsu clapped his hands together. "Excellent! Now Basil, why don't you give Serena a tour?"

"Hai, Master!"

Basil was like a walking information pamphlet. Here's what I learnt: CEDEF had about a thousand people; almost half were spies, half were computer geeks, and the remainder did paperwork. The remainder being Iemitsu's herb garden, and well, me.

* * *

><p><em>The following day...<em>

"Today we will be continuing with close combat," Iemitsu announced.

His herb garden and I were sitting in a dojo of some sort. My mood had been wishy-washy all day (I didn't sleep at 16:00, ever; being under constant surveillance irked me; I was practically force fed breakfast; Iemitsu seemed to 'accidentally' press a red button too often; paperwork: no further explanation needed) so I was secretly glad that I could release my pent-up frustration.

"Specifically, defensive responses. But first, I'd like to introduce a new...colleague, transferring here from the Varia. Serena..." he motioned for me to stand up. I folded my arms and looked in a different direction. _Hn. Like I'm gonna do that asshole._

Iemitsu sighed, stuck a hand in his pocket, and a second later, my watch zapped. I was so shocked (excuse the pun) I shot up in a defensive stance. He put on a cheesy face. "Ah, Serena, thank you for demonstrating that. You can sit down now."

Basil looked at me funny. "Serena-dono...is your watch smoking?"

"Of course not Basil," I lied, looking away so he wouldn't notice my twitching eye. For the next half hour, I ignored Iemitsu talk and demonstrate various techniques Colonello taught me when I was five. Instead, I used my imagination to think about the most painful deaths a person could possible suffer before their mind snapped.

Someone shook my shoulder, snapping me out of my thoughts. "Serena-dono? "

"Huh what?" I murmured, looking up and around. "Ah, since Serena has the audacity to ignore me, it's clear she already knows everything I'm explaining," Iemitsu's voice floated towards me. There were a few chuckles around the room.

"Which means she won't mind being my practice dummy," Lal Mirch decided, standing in front of me.

_What exactly did I miss?_ *cough* "Actually, I have to pass. My doctor..." I thought up quickly. Lal Mirch was a super-baby at last count. Even though I didn't want to, I had to start valuing my life, or how did Iemitsu say it? 'The Varia will go to Vindice'.

"Pass? What a wimp. Is that what the Varia is really made of?"

I clenched my fists. Was Lal trying to pick a fight? Mammon told me I could trust her. I did trust Mammon, so I got up after her.

But without warning, she suddenly disappeared. On instinct, I swiveled around, but Lal Mirch already had my wrist in a lock. Tch. Now Lal Mirch really was trying to piss me off. And she was succeeding too.

"Lesson number one," Lal Mirch stated. "Can anyone tell me what that is?"

"Hai, Lal-dono!" _One day, I swear I'll find out why Basil loves Japanese stuff so much. He can speak perfectly fine Italian, and he clearly isn't of Japanese descent. And honestly, the whole dono thing is creeping me out..._ "Be alert, even when you're with people you trust."

*slap* "Exactly." Lal let go of my wrist, and turned me around. *slap* "Again!"

Ok. Lal really was a nice person; if you looked over the slaps. For the sliver of time I sparred with Lal, I was trying so hard to stay alive, I actually forgot about hating Iemitsu or the Ninth.

"Welcome to CEDEF, Serena," Lal told me as she went to get a sports drink. "Anyone else want to have a brawl with Serena?"

Unfortunately, apparently they all did. Sighing to myself, I hastily picked Basil rather than Oregano or Turmeric because well...he was a kid. "Master, may I use the pills?" he asked Iemitsu. I saw Iemitsu nod. _Pills? Does he mean steroids? Or an aspirin...? He can't possibly mean the contraceptive ones._

"Naïve," Lal muttered.

"Basil's probably one of the most dangerous people in CEDEF. He just seems innocent..." Turmeric grumbled.

"Undoubtedly," Oregano agreed.

Basil fumbled in his pocket for a pill, and immediately after swallowing, a blue flame sprung up on his forehead. I did a double take. _WTF?_ _Dying will flame? But why's it blue? Holy shit..._

Basil charged.

Duck. Dodge. Swerve. Jump. Basil was honestly trying to break my bones; unlike Lal Mirch who'd been going for the kill - kill spots weren't hard to learn. And plus, I didn't really want to hurt Basil - he was a nice kid. So I dodged.

*ZAP* I froze mid-step. *Eye twitches* Momentarily, the thought of Basil charging towards me at full speed left me as I took my time to glare. Iemitsu was _smiling _damn it. _  
><em>

"Yah!" Just as Basil was just about throw a punch, I did a low, middle and then high reverse roundhouse kick in succession. Hang on a sec. That was dangerous. And deadly. _What did I do to Basil?!_ To my surprise: absolutely nothing. He just continued trying to break my bones.

"You certainly do have a lot of strength, Serena-dono!" he grinned when the flame faded.

"Huh..." I muttered, figuring the fight was over.

I fought with Oregano and Turmeric, but they weren't as much of a hassle as Basil. Then again, they didn't take any pills either. "So," I started as I threw Turmeric over my shoulder, "are we done?"

"I'd like a fight," Iemitsu called, tasteless grin on his face. He popped open a small tin canister. "You can try a dying will pill."

The pill intrigued me - and the chance to 'accidentally' kill Iemitsu was more than enough to sway my decision. I took a pill, hoping for something amazing to happen and...nothing.

"Ready?"

_At least he has the courtesy to ask if someone's ready for a fight. _"Whenever you're ready, old man."

There were definitely a few sniggers. Iemitsu smirked. "Old? I'll show you old."

I waited for the supreme moment.

...

Iemitsu blinked. The damn girl disappeared. Where the hell did she go? His hyper intuition nagged him to turn around - just in time to see Serena dash between his legs. The flame had originally been blue...right? He could've sworn it was just indigo. What the hell...

He blocked a series of well placed kicks and punches - the flame was definitely red now. Iemitsu smirked. Now this _was _entertaining. She took a few steps back, disappeared, and appeared on his left. Wait – his right as well. The flame was indigo again. Left or right? He couldn't decide. Finally, the left side figure jumped up.

Iemitsu raised an arm in defense, but a foot suddenly swung at his head from his right. Iemitsu stumbled back a few steps, surprised to feel pain. It was time to end the fight. Iemitsu charged, swerved an attack and punched - Serena blocked, and the flame transitioned into a green. Focusing carefully on the flame, Iemitsu kneed her in the stomach.

She cried out in pain, skidding back, barely able to keep her balance. "Peace at mind. Think like Buddha. His jiggly fat absorbs shock." Her flame disappeared, so Iemitsu relaxed his stance.

"Well, had enough yet?"

In a heartbeat, Serena covered the distance between them. Unprepared, Iemtisu could only stand there, bracing himself for impact. He could foresee the damage - her palm would drive into his nose, pushing fragments of broken bone into his brain. Now that they were inches apart, he could make out a virtually transparent orange flame.

And then she tripped on her shoelaces.

"Man, that's a shame," he grinned, hiding his immense relief. "Oh, and you're bleeding...a lot... Want me to get a medic or something?"

She studied her ruined stitches for about a long moment. "Oh, no, I'm absolutely fine; I'll just stay here and bleed slowly to death."

* * *

><p>Two<em> months<em> later, I returned to CEDEF.

"Well, isn't it nice to have you back?" Iemitsu speculated, elbows on his desk.

"Tch. Since when was feces *ZAP* even a swear?" I inquired, arms folded. "And honestly, it just can't beat shit *ZAP*."

He coughed. "Today we're discussing what courses you'll be taking for school this year."

"DON'T try to change the subject Iemitsu," I accused, banging my hand on the table. "Four times! I had surgery four more times because you just couldn't punch a little higher! And I'm not going back to school, so you can go fuck *ZAP* yourself."

"I see that watch hasn't helped your language..." he sighed. "As for your education, it is compulsory. Since you spent so long in recuperation, I chose your subjects for you."

"Tch. Up yours. I refuse to go to school."

"Well in that case, I'm going to have to give Vindice a call about - "

* * *

><p>The first day of school always sucks; and I say that from experience. I was a second year now, so classes didn't depend on age. Iemitsu chose as many subjects a student was allowed to do – ten. The only subject I could relax in was mafia studies.<p>

In a nutshell, it covered mafia law as well as techniques necessary and unique to the trade (aka. disposing dead bodies, human trafficking, drugs etc.). It was basically a class for people with a future as a leader of a group or family.

I had mafia studies on the first day. By the time I made it to class, Dino was sitting by himself, whilst every seat around him was taken up by a girl who was oggling him. To be honest, I felt sorry for him, so I sat down next to him – which was basically suicide, since the rest of the year would undoubtedly be spent as a postal service for half-assed love letters.

"Sup Dino," I muttered, nudging his arm with my elbow.

"Just leave me al – oh. Serena!" he gasped, taking out a pair of earplugs. "I haven't heard from you at all! Reborn wouldn't tell me a thing - I was so worried! I went to visit, but you disappeared. And when I contacted the Varia, the Ninth told me I wasn't allowed to meet you and - "

I held up a hand for him to stop. _I __can't tell him about the crib incident or the Varia will go to Vindice. _"I was in hospital."

"Oh," he murmured, looking depressed. "I never got to say thank you for...you know."

"Don't worry about it."

"But you had major surgery! Are you all right? How do you feel?"

_Like hell. _"I'm on drugs."

"I thought they didn't work."

"They don't."

Dino looked as if he wanted to pursue the matter, but the teacher arrived a moment later, so he let it drop.

* * *

><p>It was almost half a year before I had the courage to actually look at Lussuria and Mammon's gifts. Taking them out of a drawer, I was a little hesitant - after all they were assassins. Lussuria's gift was possibly a dress or something, so I opened Mammon's book first.<p>

On the other side of a cover, Mammon's elegant writing stared back at me. _Never judge a book by its cover._

Inside was a detailed guide to creating illusions, seeing through them, the works. There was faint pencil marks where Mammon had tried to single out things to recognize that an illusion was in place (I couldn't see the damn things in the first place). There was everything you could possibly need to know about creating false identities, and how to become 'invisible'. I was impressed. I never knew the little git had it in him.

Putting the book aside, I opened Lussuria's present.

A photo album.

Squalo had obviously helped; my baby photos had somehow ended up in it. Man...I can't believe I used to be so..._fat. _Then there was my family, primary school years, my friends, and...the Varia. Some of the photos were from security cameras. The day I met Bel and Lussuria. Dinner brawls. Chinese New Year. The day Xanxus turned up. A drunken me grinning at the inheritance ceremony. Movie night. Squalo's birthday. Hospital recuperations.

It was all there.

_I don't want to miss a thing! Take lots of photos! :3_

_Lussuria~_

I thought I was ready. I was wrong.

* * *

><p>The year flew by and disappeared before I knew it. Dino grades improved. Mine stayed the same. Thirteenth place again. Only difference was I didn't put in any effort.<p>

And then the anniversary came.

**Ninth Birthday**

Staring at my watch, I couldn't help but sigh. 00:01. One year. Exactly a year ago, I'd started my road through hell. After a few hours, finally exhausted from my negative thoughts, I was woken up for some emergency.

Iemitsu looked pretty pumped up for the early hour. "Tonight, there were several assassination attempts towards allied families of the Vongola," he started quite seriously, "including me. Luckily, they all failed."

_Tch. I knew my luck would be bad today. _"This bother's me...how?" I yawned. *ZAP*.

"CEDEF will not tolerate this. We will find the perpetrator behind these assassinations." Iemitsu slammed his hands on the table melodramatically. "Dismissed."

_You say we, but you actually mean everyone OTHER than you right? _Yawning, I plodded off in my own time. "This still doesn't bother me."

"The Cavallone family was attacked as well," Iemitsu said to my back. "The head of their family is in critical condition."

* * *

><p><em>Countless hours later...<em>

Stifling a yawn, Oregano sat down on the edge of Turmeric's desk with coffee for both of them. Lal Mirch and Basil were also there, sipping on hot chocolate. "Serena-dono doesn't look tired, does she?" Basil asked, amused, looking at Serena tapping away furiously with the same bored expression she always wore.

"Good point...I haven't seen her leave that desk since...I can't remember..." Turmeric yawned. "We haven't got any leads at all. And honestly, I doubt we'd ever find anything. I wonder why she even bothers - we're all half asleep..."

"You know, sometimes I wonder if she's even human," Oregano thought, staring.

"Oh don't be ridiculous Oregano. You can't possibly believe in the extra-terrestrial," Turmeric protested, rolling his eyes. "So what if she barely eats, sleeps, wears a hat unnaturally often, is hypothetically a killing machine and has a couple of mental disorders? You come across someone like her every six billion people."

"What, that doesn't sound extra-terrestrial to you?" Oregano argued, arms crossed.

"Oregano, she's human. It's just the anniversary," Lal revealed, unable to bear their bickering any longer.

"Anniversary? Do you mean her...birthday?" Basil inquired, confused.

Lal looked thoughtful for a moment. "Well...I think it is her birthday today, but that's not it. It's the anniversary of the crib incident. But she's just being childish – moping about like that."

"Uh...hate to disappoint you, Lal, but she is kinda...a child..." Turmeric reminded.

"That's no excuse!"

"She's not a _child, _she's an alien."

"Drop it Oregano!"

*sigh* "You know I can hear every god damn *ZAP* word you're saying right?" I called out, walking to the printer and skimming over my findings.

"We just think that you should have a break, Serena-dono," Basil put in. "You should rest..."

Makoto Kozato. A fine arts dealer, Japanese, married, with two kids. All the weapons carried by the assassins that were caught came from his postal address, though technically he had little to do with the mafia, and even had alibi during the time of the attacks. Oh well, a dead end was good enough. I returned to my desk, pulled the stapler out of the drawer and looked up. Oh...Basil was still talking...

" – and I think you're about to...lose it," he finished, trying to sound nice.

"Lose it? Pfft. I'm fine!" I passed off. *Accidently staples own hand* I threw the stapler into the garbage can. Piece of trash. Never, NEVER trust anything made in a country you can't pronounce. Picking up my jacket, I strolled into Iemitsu's office.

Iemitsu seemed to be in deep thought. Muttering to himself, and drumming his fingers on his desk. "I found a dead lead. So I'm taking a break," I announced, tossing the stack of papers in front of him and turning for the door.

"Oh, where're you going?" he questioned, as if he only just realized I was there.

"A walk."

"In the rain?" he mocked, sitting back in his chair, looking at his multiple television screens.

"It's just rain."

"Whatever. Just go eat something, or it'll make me look bad," he muttered, scanning though my report.

I rolled my eyes as I waited for the elevator. "Self-centered bastard *ZAP*..."

* * *

><p><em>Somewhere, not too far away...<em>

A homeless man glanced miserably at the rain, watching from his shelter at an alley.

"VOI! Hobo, I have a deal for you!" Squalo said pointing his sword at the man's throat in his usual voice, but it came out more as a yell.

"Aaarrgghhh! Don't kill me!" he cried, trying to inch away from the creepy guy.

"I'll pay you fifty Euros if you take this to the girl in the photo. She's sitting at the park bench four blocks from here. I'll give you another fifty when you return. Deal?" Squalo threatened, holding a box wrapped in waterproof plastic.

"Uh..."

"VOI! Do we have a deal or not?"

The homeless man squeaked a forced yes.

* * *

><p><em>Four blocks away, at a park bench...<em>

I was completely soaked, but I was kinda aiming to catch a cold and spend a few weeks in misery. A while later, a homeless guy walked towards me. (If you get to know them, they're nice people. I mean, I started telling one my life story once; and he gave me twenty bucks _before _I got to the mafia part.)

"Hey...little girl..." The man looked back and forth between the picture and the girl. Was it the same person? It was hard to tell. The person in the picture was so innocent. But the person park bench looked on the verge of suicide.

"Wassup?" I asked casually.

"Um...I think this is for you..." he muttered, handing over a medium sized box.

"For me...?" I muttered. _It could be a bomb. _"Can you describe the person who gave it to you?"

"Well...he was about this tall *gestures above head*, had a sword, and he had a really scary...'voi'..." the man tried to remember.

The last droplets of the rain stopped. I was suddenly on the verge of bliss. The happiness was unbelievable. Squalo. He remembered my birthday... Hang on a sec – that meant he was close. And he'd been watching me. _But...I can't meet him_.

Now wasn't that just dandy.

* * *

><p>Basil cringed. Serena and Iemitsu had been yelling at each other for a while.<p>

"Why the fuck *ZAP* would you care? Do you have something against cakes?" I yelled sarcastically.

"Don't lie! The Varia gave that to you, didn't they!" he retorted angrily. "Do you want them to go to Vindice?"

"Correction: a homeless guy turned up and gave it to me. Last time I checked, the Varia was an assassination squad, not a bunch of homeless people!" I shot back.

"Oh, and how would you know that it isn't...poisoned? Maybe it's a bomb! How would you know that?" Iemitsu accused. Uh oh. I had to say something – I'd look like an idiot if I stopped talking now. So instead, I vented out the all the anger I'd felt in the past year.

"You know what? Keep the stupid cake for all I care. Because that's the type of person you are – selfish, arrogant, annoying, fat, lazy, stupid *ZAP* and completely inhuman!" I waved the watch he'd given me in front of his face. "You see this? This, is your fucking *ZAP*, feeble attempt to turn me into a loyal servant! WELL FUCK *ZAP* TO THAT! I DON'T GIVE THE GOD DAMN *ZAP* SHIT *ZAP* ABOUT YOU, OR ANYTHING EVEN PARTIALLY _CONNECTED _TO YOU!"

I stormed off for the door.

"And where do you think you're going?" Iemitsu ordered, standing up.

"I'm taking a walk!"

"You just came _back _from a walk!"

"So what, now I can't walk?!"

"Brat..." Iemitsu muttered, lounging in his chair. That girl would never know how much stress she'd added into his life...

"Geez Iemitsu, just give her the damn cake," Lal grumbled, walking into his office. "She actually looked _happy _for the first time...well, since she came to CEDEF."

"She disobeyed my - "

"Give it a rest Iemitsu. You technically got no dirt on her either," Lal concluded. "Have you found the perpetrator?"

"At this rate, accusing anyone will break the alliances we already have," Iemitsu shrugged, yawning. "I gotta go back to Japan soon," he sighed. "I miss Nana's cooking...and my kid's so cute!"

"Hn. I've seen his grades, Iemitsu. They're _beyond _terrible. You should go hire a tutor or something," Lal insulted, leaving his office.

Iemitsu sighed. "Women..."

* * *

><p>It was getting dark. But that didn't matter. I was going to run until I forgot everything.<p>

"Enma, watch out!"

CRASH. I glanced up, and saw a kid with red hair using me as a cushion. I dropped my head back onto the pavement. OUCH. PAIN. ARGH.

"Itai..." the kid muttered, attempting to sit up (elbowing my gut in the process).

'Wait, don't elbow me,' was what I wanted to say, but it came out more like "OOF."

He seemed to notice I was there for the first time. "Oh! I'm so sorry. I thought I landed on some mud..." _Oh gee. I'm being compared to mud by a complete stranger. _I blinked. Hang on a second...I swore I knew him...from...huh. Couldn't remember.

The girl beside him (his younger sister?) grinned and punched his shoulder. And I'm not talking about a friendly tap – I mean a full on 'die!' punch. Sibling love? Tough... "Enma, you're so clumsy! I'm Mami by the way," she said, turning to me.

"Serena..." I replied, dusting off my clothes. "So uh, are you guys okay?" I asked awkwardly, watching Enma limp around in circles.

"Don't worry, he'll be fine," Mami whispered to me. "He walks into poles a lot; so his head's really thick."

"Mami...that's not a compliment..." Enma whined.

"Who said it was a compliment?" she grinned, turning to me. Her voice dropped to a not so quiet whisper. "His nickname's Loser-Enma. How lame is that?"

"Mami!"

Something was bugging me. Why were they talking in Japanese? "Oh, Serena, would you like to come to our place to clean up? You've got scratches everywhere..." Enma murmured, staring curiously.

"Oh no – I'm fine..." I laughed unnaturally, thinking quickly for an excuse so I could walk away.

"Come on; it's only down the street!" Mami insisted, dragging me along.

"But...uh...er..." Nothing. No excuses came to mind. Enma picked up his ruined bicycle from the sidewalk and trailed behind us.

Their house was nice. Family portraits hung on the walls, and everything seemed so bright and cheery. "Mom! We're home!" Enma called, walking into the living room.

"Oh Enma...who's our guest?" she smiled, looking at me.

"I'm uh...Serena. I accidentally bumped into Enma...and broke his bicycle..." I hesitated, feeling lost for words.

And then Makoto Kozato walked in. The guy from the report. He was wearing an apron, and dried his hands on a tea towel. My judgment told me he was a decent guy. "Hello, welcome to our home. Serena, was it? Nice to see a fellow Japanese."

"No, I'm not - "

"Anyways, Serena's staying for dinner!" Mami decided, holding my hand and dragging me further into the depths of their home.

"I am...? No hang on - "

"Of course!" their mother smiled. "You can stay the night if you want." _Inviting strangers to dinner? __Crazy. Psychotic. _

"Mom, you're kinda going overboard..." Enma warned, facepalming. "Dad, do something!"

"But I think that's a great idea, Enma. You actually made a friend! A cute one too! *drops to a loud whisper* She might even be your girlfriend soon!"

"It's not like that..."

* * *

><p>I'm a terrible person for every suspecting the Kozato family. No really. They're pretty much the perfect 'we get along so very well' family.<p>

Walking back took a lot longer than I thought it would. My brain purposely took a roundabout route to CEDEF, so I technically missed my curfew. But my watch hadn't zapped me as a reminder yet. After signing in at the main desk, I waited for the elevator. _What will he do? _Every possibility in my head ended like this: 'The Varia's going to Vindice. I ate your cake.'

But there was something that was bothering me. I'd seen Enma's face before - in a deam. It was like how I mysteriously knew about the crib incident before it happened. Some funky shit was seriously going on.

And there was only one way to prove it.

I'd dreamt about something odd happening a few months ago; some sort of an elevator incident. But time passed, and I hadn't even heard about a single elevator failure; or anything partially linked between elevators and mafia.

"Oh, so you're back..." Iemitsu proclaimed, seemingly uninterested as he strolled into the building.

I snapped out of my thoughts. "Iemitsu...I'm sorry. I said some things that were better left unsaid..." I said quickly. _Apologizing first thing...completely despicable..._

"Don't worry about it. Your cake's in the fridge. You can take the watch off now. Clearly, it'll never cure your language," Iemitsu yawned and looked around. "I also know for a fact that I'm not lazy, arrogant or fat. I just assumed you were making up insults on the spot."

The elevator sure was slow. "Actually, I thought I was pretty spot on when I said that," I muttered.

"What...! Geez, you're such an annoying kid..." he growled sheepishly, subconsciously patting his stomach. "I'll have you know I've got a six pack."

*Ding* _Oh finally. Stupid elevator..._The doors opened and...red paint. Hang on. That metallic smell...no.

Blood.

* * *

><p>There were twelve bodies in the elevator. All of them were brutally murdered. They couldn't have been dead for very long; a couple minutes at most. There were a few bullets on the scene, and ballistics traced the weapon to Makoto Kozato.<p>

I didn't want to leave Iemitsu staring so coldly at the picture of the Kozato family, but Lal ordered me to sleep. Oregano reassured me that Iemitsu wouldn't hurt a fly (she was really_ that _convincing) and they'd keep an eye on him.

I'd just sat down on my bed when a spark went through my mind. I sat bolt upright. It was still my birthday. Something was bound to happen before midnight. Quickly, I got dressed again, and snuck out when Lal went to the bathroom.

There were ear-splitting screams as I reached their street. _Damn, I'm late!_ _Isn't the rest of the street hearing this?_ I slammed open the door, to see blood splattered all over the house. The walls, the carpet...

And the killer was still there.

_Iemitsu?!_

The image matched. The voice didn't. "Nu fu fu fu...finish this one off for me, Serena!" his voice laughed, throwing over Enma's body. He was unconscious, but seemed otherwise finee. When I looked up, Iemitsu was gone.

I stood there blankly. Speed Dial. "Lal. Has Iemitsu left his room?"

"No."

"You're sure?" I pestered. Illusions. That had to be it. Did I actually see an illusion then?

"Of course. What's going on Serena? Aren't you in your room?" she asked, tired.

I wish.

* * *

><p><em>One week later...<em>

It was an open and shut case. Honestly, I preferred it that way. Being the only witness (unreliable as it was), the Ninth had no choice but to believe me when I told them it could've have been Iemitsu...because well, he didn't laugh like 'nu fu fu fu'. Because of my testimony, the Ninth dropped the case.

Enma was taken to a family friend's house, but I watched him for a while (I'm not a stalker, I swear). Taking a swig of red bull, I thought about my fate. Was this meant to happen? If took a taxi there, would this have never happened? I couldn't say. Maybe I just wasn't able to save people.

There was a little commotion across the street, and I took my gaze from the night sky to Enma's window. Ah, nightmare again. A few seconds passed, and I watched a girl run into his room and calm him down.

We made eye contact for a second; and the look in her eyes convinced me that Enma would be absolutely fine. Either that, or her glare was just plain terrifying. Abandoning my post, I started to make my way back to CEDEF.

"SURPRISE!"

Eh? Oregano, Turmeric, Iemitsu, Basil and Lal were crammed into my small room.

"Since you didn't tell us it was your birthday last week, we decided to throw you a birthday party!" Basil said excitedly.

"You do realize it's three in the morning right?" I muttered, grinning nonetheless.

* * *

><p>The rest of my holidays went pretty smoothly. I spent more and more time with Dino; whether it was studying or just 'hanging out'. Iemitsu kept on giving me more and more work; it was less assassination and more sabotage. The paperwork just kept on piling up.<p>

I went skiing with Dino, for the first time. It was pretty smooth – well, to certain degree. Here's what it was like:

"_Dino, have you ever actually skied before?" I asked skeptically._

"_Yeah! Like twice. Just copy me, and before you'll know it, it'll feel natural."_

"_But this mountain is so steep..."_

"_Chill Serena!" he reassured, giving a smile._

_Several seconds later: Dino crashed into a tree. (If you must blame anyone, blame Reborn who just so happened to kick him off his skis.)_

"_Dino! Should I crash too?" I asked desperately, looking behind my shoulder as I gained speed._

"_Don't go in that direction!"_

"_What? I can't hear you!"_

_*falls into deep crevice*_

And I could actually fly a plane. Without crashing. Though it was still a pretty bumpy ride...but hey – one year, and lift-off was good enough for me. It's a shame I missed the landing – and landed on the Cavallone grounds, where Reborn was forcing Dino to run a few laps. His expression was worth the lectures.

* * *

><p><strong>Tenth B-day:<strong>

Another hit. Rome.

I was in the midst of an argument with myself, thus I didn't realize the screams until I was right right beside the source. Two guys were beating up a kid curled up in a fetal position on the floor. "Oi, leave the kid alone."

"Tch. You're just a child," one of them snickered, taking a step forward. I swung my foot casually between his legs, and watched him crumple on the floor next to the kid. The other one charged forward, and I broke his nose with my elbow.

"You've got about two minutes before they'll get up," I advised the kid, without actually looking at him. I sighed one last time and left.

Coughing on the floor, Gokudera stared. That girl...what was her name again? One of the men groaned beside him. _Time to go..._ Looking in the direction the girl left, he made a split second decision to follow her. Maybe she would take him as an apprentice.

* * *

><p>"The Trevi fountain is 25.9 meters high and 19.8 meters wide. The fountain is at the juncture of three roads, thus the name 'tre vie'..."<p>

Another tour guide. I yawned. Waiting was always the most boring part. Sitting on the steps in front of the fountain, eating gelato, watching tourists roam around through the tint of sunglasses...made me feel...normal.

"...the tossing of the "three coins", legend says that this act brings good luck to throw three coins with the right hand over one's left shoulder into the Trevi Fountain and they are also sure to return to Rome."

That caught my attention. Luck. Quickly finishing off the gelato, I re-adjusted my floppy sun hat and dug out all the coins from my pocket. Right hand. Left shoulder. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Flip. Just as I was about to throw in a thirteenth, a voice spoke in English beside me.

"The legend says three coins. I'm not sure thirteenth will bring you a lot of luck."

I turned around, and saw a woman dressed smartly but casually, staring intently at the fountain. Target lock. "Well, I just threw twelve coins, so four times the luck right?"

"You speak English?" she said, surprised.

"Yeah. I'm a tourist," I shrugged, using one of my common identity lies. _Don't get attached. Don't get attached. She's just a body made of carbon, hydrogen, oxygen, nitrogen, phosphorus and sulfur. And maybe some other shit too._

"You certainly are full of revelations," she decided. "I'm a journalist from England."

"Cool. Are you on holidays as well?"

"Ha ha...no. I'm looking for a boy. I really want to talk to him," she shrugged, taking out a picture...of me. It wasn't too recent, but it had a clear shot of my face as well as my Varia uniform, knife in one hand and a rifle slung on one shoulder. Suddenly it made sense why Iemitsu wanted me to kill her so urgently.

Pretending to be somewhat interested, I leaned forward. "Eh? Is this from a movie?"

The journalist smiled. "There are bad people in the world. I think he works for them. I want the world to know if bad things like this are happening."

With a sigh, I removed my hat and sunglasses. "And what if I don't want the world to know?"

"Y-You're...!"

"You said you wanted to talk. How much do you know?"

She nodded, taking a moment to calm down. "I'm sorry, I never expected...alright. Look, I know what you do. I know vaguely who you work for. But why do you do it?"

"Believe it or not, I have people I care about," I murmured. "If I don't, they're in trouble."

"Help me finish my article," she insisted, "and I can help you."

"No, you can't." I took out a pistol from my pocket, and fired into the air. The deafening sound was enough to throw everyone around the fountain to go into utter chaos. The two of us remained rooted to the spot. I screwed on a silencer, and took a deep breath, raising the gun. "I'm sorry."

* * *

><p>Glancing one last time at a photo from my album, I walked over to the balcony and sat on the ledge. The building was six stories high. I'd probably be stuck in a coma if I fell head first. Pouring myself the last glass of whisky, I sighed. In my head, I could still see the images of my victims piled up. Almost three hundred now. Looking down, I was about to propel myself off when I heard a familiar voice.<p>

"Committing suicide isn't the right answer," the voice said.

Miserable and slightly drunk, I thought it was my guardian angel or something. "What's the point? I destroy families, homes, lives. I'm an abomination to the world. My sole existence is a curse."

"Tch. If you believe that, then you're an idiot."

I suddenly realized that it wasn't my guardian angel talking. Turning around, I saw the kid I'd helped earlier today lying down on my bed, smoking with his hands behind his head. "Uh...who are you and how the hell did you get in here?"

"Well...I was following - "

"You mean stalking."

"FOLLOWING you, and you didn't lock the door. My name's Gokudera. Thanks for helping earlier."

_Gokudera! _"I know you! You're Bianchi's little brother!" I exclaimed, having an epiphany.

"You – wait, you're that bitch that helped her invent poison cooking!" he yelled, jumping of the bed, drawing a stick of dynamite. "Why did you help me? Are you trying to take me back? Did my father ask you to find me?"

Eh? "Gokudera, I haven't seen Bianchi since I went to high school. And you sound like you ran away from home."

He looked at the floor, lowering his dynamite. "I hate them," he spat out angrily.

"You shouldn't hate your family, Gokudera. One day you'll miss them," I sighed wistfully, staring at the sky.

"I won't miss them. I ran away by _choice, _and I'm never going back! They're not even - "

He stopped talking so suddenly, I turned around and walked back into my room. Gokudera was staring at a picture of my aunt. "Where did you get this picture?" he whispered, shocked.

"My aunt. But she died at least six years ago. Is something wrong? You look pale."

"This...this is a photo of my mother."

*Awkward silence*

"So uh, how sure are you?" I asked, after at least a minute.

"100%."

"So um...Gokudera, I suppose that makes us cousins..."

"Cousins."

I sat down on the edge of the bed, and closed the album. "Okay. So let's summarize your life. You've been on the run for...?"

"Almost...three years. No family wanted to take me in."

My brain worked overtime trying to put everything together. If Gokudera survived for so long, he was at least pretty smart. You had to admire his determination.

I took out my wallet, and handed him my credit card. The PIN was written in the corner. "To be honest, you came at a really bad time," I finally decided, standing up again. Walking back to the balcony, I gulped the rest of the whisky in my cup, stood up on the ledge, and was about to jump off when Gokudera stopped me.

"What the hell are you doing?" he yelled.

"Um...saving my soul?" I said in a 'duh' voice, pointing at the street, six floors down.

"Why? I just found out that you're the only family I have!"

"I'm an assassin, Gokudera. You probably saw what happened today. I have to take responsibility - and frankly, it's killing me."

Gokudera thought heavily for a few seconds. "Fine." He stepped on the ledge as well. "I see your point. My life is pointless. I might as well go die."

"No! Gokudera, what are you doing? You've got so much to live for!" I argued, dragging him off.

"If you jump, I'll jump right afterwards," he said with a smirk.

I knew it. He's smart.

* * *

><p>"So...you're an assassin."<p>

I looked up from my ravioli. We were lucky to find a restaurant willing to serve two kids at such a late hour. "Yeah."

Gokudera was a fast eater. Or maybe he was just hungry. He was already up to dessert. "It's like the perfect job. Good pay, easy work."

My hand stiffened with the fork mid way between my mouth and the plate. "Easy? That's an understatement. The hours are absolutely terrible. And there's a lot of guilt involved. You're constantly on the run and can't have a social life. Is that what you really want?"

"Yes!" he answered without a second of hesitation. "You can you teach me, and then - "

I called over a waiter and paid for the bill. "I don't want to be blunt; but I don't have time to babysit you."

"So what; you're just going to leave me here?" he spat out, offended. "Let me come with you! I'll just follow you and learn along the way. You won't even know I'm there!"

You won't even know I'm there. I'd said that to Squalo many a time, so I could relate to how Gokudera probably felt. "Fine. I'll sign you up for a school for Mafioso kids. I'll take care of the fees and paperwork. I'll bring you along every now and then. Deal?"

"Deal."

It was only when I was waiting for my plane to arrive when I remembered that it was my birthday. I mean...Gokudera was a big surprise, and he did take my mind off it. Nothing THAT bad happened, right? I mean, I found a supposedly 'long lost' relative. So maybe my birthday cursed. Maybe.

* * *

><p><em>A few months later...<em>

The lunch bell rang, and I was the first out of the classroom. Three hours of math tested limits. Almost immediately, I bumped into Gokudera. "Hey. Got any jobs lately?" he asked, tailing me as I shuffled to my locker.

*Sigh* "Gokudera, I've already taken you to eighteen of my hits. Is that not good enough for you?" I grumbled, trying to find my keys. Once again, I'd 'misplaced' them.

"No!" he hollered, making a few people turn their heads towards our direction. "The guy on the bridge. You made me sit on the riverbank and watch him fall into the water. Then there was the guy in the bathroom. You told me you were just washing your hands at that restaurant and BAM! We leave, _then _you tell me he's dead. How the hell am I meant to learn anything?"

Finally. Found my keys. Accidentally left them on _top _of my locker. Who would've known? "Well Gokudera, think about the first time. The girl was taking a morning run, and you tripped over a trash can or something, woke up everyone on the street, tripped the alarm of someone's backyard so I had to kill her in broad daylight. Course, the witnesses got all the details wrong, but that's not the point." The locker door swung open, and I fumbled around, trying to find my wallet.

"It wasn't a trash can, a dog attacked me!" he complained.

"Then there was the time when you threw the dynamite at the wrong person, and I looked like a complete jackass in front of the target. Remember _that_?"

"But that was _before _you helped me hold and throw dynamite between my fingers!" he argued. "I've been practicing a lot!"

I skimmed through a few pages of a report I'd gotten that morning. Eh? Emergency? "I need to go to Paris; my plane leaves in half an hour. If you really want to learn, tag along. But if you get in the way, I won't make you forget it easily."

"Yes!" he grinned, pumping his fist. "Do I get to kill anyone?"

"This isn't a job that involves killing. We're sabotaging a tennis match."

"Tennis?" he groaned. "Why the hell are you so boring?"

"Why the hell are you so _whiny_?" I shot back.

* * *

><p><em>In France:<em>

"Can I shoot?" Gokudera whispered, crouching beside me.

"Shut up Gokudera. You've got no training for a sniper rifle, and stop ruining my concentration. You're annoying. Go check if the hallway's clear," I ordered.

"Tch," he scowled, leaving the room and shutting the door noisily. Urgh. I didn't even need to shoot; the guy was winning of his own accord.

There was some odd shuffling noise outside, quickly followed by a yell. Gokudera's yell. Man that kid was annoying... Deciding that family was probably more important, I stormed out the door, and into a troublesome sight; Gokudera was about to have his brains capped by some fat Asian dude.

Judging from the gun, build and tattoos, probably a triad member. I was about to pull out a gun and shoot, but a hand grabbed me by the neck and slammed into a wall. I see. There were _two _fat Asian guys. There wasn't too much hallway left between the two of them.

"We are looking for you long time forever," the guy holding my neck said, squeezing slowly.

"Oh have you? *choke* Well now that you've found me, why don't you let go of my neck? Sound like a good idea?" I replied in a series of Asian dialects. Hey, their Italian was just shameful.

A knife came whizzing through the air, aimed for my head. It would've hit me, if the Asian dude hadn't dropped me onto the floor. "Let go; she is our target, you Chinaman." _Russians?_ _Really? At a time like THIS?_

*Sharp objects fly in air* "No she's ours! Get your minority hands off the bitch!" _Americans. Wow._

"Our Ninth demands the death of this girl!" _Italians? Just fucking brilliant._

"We got here first!"

"She got us before she got you!"

"She did more damage to us!"

Sighing, I stared at the mafia members from presumably four relatively well known families; the Leilei brothers, Nuevo, Tomaso and Giegue. They were all bickering about who got the honors to kill me first – which was understandable, but I was just a tad bit busy at the moment.

*Clears throat noisily* "Ladies! I'd love to stick around, but I have business to do. Can I get back to you in I dunno, never?" I called out.

"No! Only your death will restore the dignity of my family!" There was a chorus of agreement.

I considered. "My death would kinda be bad too. You know, Vindice taking my family to prison and everything; and since I don't have a warrant for your deaths, so why don't you all just call it a day and kill me some other time?" I offered.

"No!" They all drew their guns. All twelve of them were pointed at a little (I still consider myself pretty young), innocent (every once in a blue moon) girl.

Left without much of an option, I beat the crap out of them first. "What do you want, other than my life?" I asked, prodding some guy with my foot.

"Die...bitch..." he murmured.

"Yeah – you see, I already know that, so can you just tell me what you want?" I asked, sitting down in the centre of the pile of bodies. The diplomatic approach. This felt so weird...

"Money."

I looked up. Oh, Gokudera was still alive. Congrats to him. "Money? And why on earth would they want money?"

"Money is power..." one of them muttered, nodding approvingly at Gokudera.

"Money can buy you everything. The person who said money can't buy you happiness was _so _wrong," another added.

Blink. "So let me get this straight. The _only_, ONLY thing I have to do is give your families some money, and you'll all be happy and leave me alone?" I asked, baffled. How shallow.

* * *

><p>We were in the airport the following morning. "That was so fun!" Gokudera cheered, dragging his suitcase. "Let's do that again!"<p>

"Uh...Gokudera? Did you miss the part where all these mafia families teamed up and tried to kill us?" I muttered.

"Kill _you_. Not me. The Giegue family is SO COOL. Their masks are so epic! I love skulls."

I rolled my eyes and rifled for our tickets but my stomach lurched. Someone was watching me. That guy...I'd seen him a few times already.

"Oi Serena, tickets," Gokudera nudged, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Huh what? I don't think I can make the flight," I decided quickly. "Here's your ticket."

"Oi! Serena! WTF?"

Walking as fast as I could without attracting too much attention, I ran down the escalator so fast, I accidentally bumped into the guy I was following. Without a word, he picked me up from the floor by the scruff of my neck, and threw me into a first class 'waiting room'.

"So, Serena, Paris is nice this time round, is it not?"

The Ninth. How coincidental. Four of his guardians were in the room too, including the one who'd thrown me.

"Never like France," I sighed. "Didn't expect to bump into you here."

He folded his arms. "It's convenient that my bank account was rampaged when I woke up this morning."

"I paid you back with interest," I grumbled, annoyed. "And it was for alliances with other families."

"Alliances cannot be made without the permission of the boss. You should know that."

I pretended to cough and be interested in a few small cuts on my hands.

"Furthermore, your behavior was absolutely unacceptable. You cannot simply choose to do things for your own personal gain rather than complete your task," he added sternly. "This is unforgivable."

"Well I don't need or want your forgiveness, and I certainly won't grant you any, Ninth. Doesn't that make us even?" I snapped.

"How dare you talk like that to the Ninth!" His right hand man (most likely) ran up and was about to throw a punch, but I dodged and twisted his arm behind his back.

"Coyote! Serena! Stop at once!"

Great. Now the Ninth was _angry_. How rare.

"Serena, since my _guardian _has acted in such a irresponsible fashion, you're lucky that I'm not punishing you. As severely. Instead, you will do community service for the Vongola family until you're thirteen! Understood?"

* * *

><p><strong>Eleven? Already?<strong>

BANG. "Baka." BANG. "Stupido." BANG. "Bête." BANG. "Idiot."

Oregano was watching interestedly at Serena calling herself an idiot in numerous languages as she attempted to walk through a wall. She wasn't the only one. Almost every single person in the building was mesmerized, pondering how many times it would take for her to fall unconscious, realise her stupidity and stop, or simple lose too many brain cells and die.

"It's June 13th again, isn't it?" Turmeric pondered out loud, staring. "Is this still because of the crib incident? Or is it because of the flood of blood incident?"

"I have no idea..." Oregano replied, remembering to blink. "Maybe it's because she was assigned to Community Service for like what; two more years?"

BANG. "Bedak." BANG. "Ahma - "

"Serena, what in the _world_ are you doing?"

I turned around to face the voice, snapping to attention and saluting. _Hang on. Why the hell am I saluting to Iemitsu? Disgraceful._ I realized he was still waiting for an answer. *Cough* "I'm...thinking."

Iemitsu looked around the room *everyone starts working again*. "Well, keep in mind to think more quietly in the future. You've got an invitation." He handed me a hand written note.

"Who is it now?" I asked dejectedly, throwing it onto my desk. Whatever it was, I didn't want to deal with it today.

He hesitated on what he was going to say. "One of your friends. Dino Cavallone, I believe."

"I don't want to..." I trailed off, spinning in my chair. "It's like what; a thousand degrees outside, and it's so..._bright_."

Lal somehow appeared. For an intense moment, she studied me. "Serena, you haven't seen sunlight for a fortnight."

"Oh yes I have. I saw sunlight on TV."

"_Go_."

"But what if - "

"Did I not make myself clear?"

"...Should I be saying 'no' to mean 'yes'?"

* * *

><p>"A four? Come on Serena, admit it. That girl was <em>hot<em>," Dino grinned, taking another slurp of his lemonade.

"Nu uh. She had implants. And she's waaaayy to old for you," I exaggerated, lowing the hat over my eyes. We were at the beach; there were girls in bikini's everywhere. Dino wasn't that interested in girls, but I did notice his eyes following the crowd intently every now and then.

I knew he was trying to cheer me up - and it was working. Just a bit. Currently, we were rating girls and guys by their appearance, on a scale of 1 to 10.

"Ah, what about that guy? I'd say a two. His hair is just...eesh," Dino shuddered.

"Are you kidding Dino? That guy is actually considered _sexy_. He has abs, but isn't overly muscle. Ya know?" I surmised. "And plus, just because he has a face only a mother could love DOESN'T mean that he's a bad guy. See? He picked up a piece of litter."

Dino laughed, which just made even more girls face our direction to gawk at him. Of course, he paid no attention to them. "Oh! Check out that girl! I think she's a model or something."

"Now that, is what I call a two," I muttered in disgust. "She has so much make-up on, I think her face is starting to sag."

"Dawww – you're mean Serena." Dino sighed, and leaned back. "So Serena, how much would I get from you?"

Huh. I never actually considered Dino's appearance before. But now that he mentioned it, he did look good. Golden hair, dreamy eyes, straight teeth, toned body, height, just the right shade of tan, and a cheesy grin. I shook the image out of my mind. Dino was Dino. An average guy. "Five. No more, no less."

"What? I was gonna give you a seven," he grumbled in a good natured way, slipping his sunglasses back onto his eyes. "You wanna go for a swim later?"

"Sure." I glanced at him in my peripheral vision. He was already napping. Must be tiring to have Reborn as a tutor.

* * *

><p>Later that evening, I returned to CEDEF smelling like a beach – but I was in a good mood, and feeling spirited. I was actually subconsciously smiling – and every person I passed stared, jaw wide open.<p>

However, the first person I bumped into when I got to my floor was Coyote Nougat – the Ninth's right hand man. I figured our last encounter wasn't all that fabulous. "What the hell are _you_ doing here?"

"You - ! You got lucky last time," he growled, looking away as if he was trying to keep himself under control. "The Ninth has business with the External Advisor."

"Pfft. Business this, business that. What matters that totally have 'utmost importance' are they discussing about now?" I scoffed, trying to add sarcasm. It did the opposite, yet again.

"Well, I think it was something to do with the Estraneo family. Kid experimentations or something," he thought, shaking his head sadly. "It's been popping around in the Mafia Times (the mafia newspaper) a lot," he added, looking at my hysteric expression.

"The...Estraneo family?" I asked for confirmation.

"Yeah. The one that developed the possession bullet. The bastards – completely broke down after the Ninth disapproved the bullet," Coyote sighed, shaking his head sadly. "They were so weak afterwards."

It was that moment when the Ninth and Iemitsu finished their discussion, left their office and walked by us. Iemitsu waved a hand in front of my face. "Yo. Serena. You're back pretty late. And you need to take a shower."

"The Estraneo family..." I whispered, remembering to breathe. The words tasted sour in my mouth.

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing," the Ninth reassured. "You don't have to worry about a thing. We've just made a truce; that's all."

I glanced between Coyote's 'I'm an idiot!' face, and Iemitsu's disapproving look. "I have the right to know the truth."

"Aha!" Iemitsu almost said triumphantly, his mood doing a one eighty. "She _wants _to know. Tell her. She was bound to find out anyway."

The Ninth sighed. "Four years ago, after the possession bullet was destroyed by you and Belphegor, the Estraneo family had no means in funding; they used children in experiments to create bio-weapons. We've only just found out."

Iemitsu continued. "And since you already know, here's your next job: burn everything to the ground. Products, scientists, data, equipment. Yes?"

"By products, you mean the children, don't you?" I asked with a heavy heart.

"They are no longer children, or human for that matter, Serena. They are weapons," the Ninth insisted. "You'll be putting them out of their misery. Do you understand?"

Misery. The Ninth was the one who wasn't human. I stared into his eyes. Although they appeared warm, I found myself shivering. "I understand." I lied. "And be careful; you might never open your eyes again. Just one of those things that could happen with people your age."

"Double the security of the mansion tonight," the Ninth found himself say as Serena left. "Triple, actually."

* * *

><p>By the time I arrived at the basement of the Estraneo family's laboratory, I was sick of blood. The smell, the taste, the feel, the sight, the sound.<p>

But the basement...everyone was already dead. How...? There were a few strangled screams from another room, and two kids wrapped partially in bandages walked tentatively into the room of apparent torture.

Carefully, I peeked through the door – and the room was a mess. Blood was splattered on the walls, and the bodies were cluttered; almost as if they had exploded all over the place. In the centre of it all, was a kid, standing there, perfectly calm. Blue hair, and eyes that didn't match.

I...couldn't do it.

I'd killed children before, but I just...couldn't...hands...wouldn't move. My brain didn't process my thoughts. I just stood there, dumbstruck as the three boys walked past me. The two wrapped in bandages eyed me carefully, but the blue haired boy laughed. "Ku fu fu fu_..._what a weak mortal," he spoke, as if he knew my feelings.

"I didn't leave any survivors today," I finally managed to say. "There was no resistance."

"What makes you think I need your pity?" he sneered.

"Do whatever you want." I walked into the room, and started finding parts for a bomb. "I'm not doing this because I give a fuck about you."

"Ku fu fu fu_.._.some assassin you are," he laughed, leading the other two boys away. "You'll come to regret the weakness in your heart someday."

"And someday, is not today."

There was something familiar about his laugh.

* * *

><p>That night, I went to the Vongola mansion after sunset. The Vongola security was riddled with holes. That's all community service taught me.<p>

"You know, killing the Ninth won't reverse the stuff that's already happened," a voice from the bush beside me lectured.

That voice. No way. It couldn't be. "Dino?" I hissed. "Why the hell are you here? In a _bush_?"

"I figured you might come here," he sighed. "I heard about the situation from the Ninth over dinner. And plus, I'm hiding from Reborn."

"You can't run from Reborn, Dino. How many more years is it going to take for you to learn that?"

He laughed. "Just a few more. And hey – it doesn't hurt to try every once in a while." He cleared his throat. "But I know why you're in that bush, Serena."

"And so do I. I suppose you're not saying that because you'll help me?"

Pause. "Look, I know it's not something I'm meant to touch on, but I know something happened between you and Squalo. The last few years...you haven't quite been the same. You stare off a lot, and you seem like your really depressed. I'm...just a little worried, Serena. Are you all right?"

I couldn't lie to Dino - but I couldn't tell him the truth either. Subconsciously, I felt my eyes water. Now generally, I don't cry - I could never cry even if my life depended on it. So why now?

"You know, there are a lot of things I don't understand, and probably never will understand about you, Serena. But I know one thing; you don't kill because you want to. It's because other people force you to. So the people who died...they blame the people who make you do those things," Dino theorized. He hesitated with his next few words. "Squalo doesn't want you to be unhappy. He wants you to have a reason to smile every day."

"And how would I know?" I spluttered angrily. "I no longer know who he is; and if he's the same person, the same brother. Time corrupts; time changes."

"Then, has time corrupted you?" he asked. "Time has made you bitter and old, Serena. You can choose where time takes you. You can make your own path; your own fate."

"Dino...do you hate me?" I asked dejectedly, on impulse. "I'm a terrible person. We're not related; and you're way older than me. Whenever shit happens, you're always the one trying to start the conversation, the one to pick me off the floor. Why do you bother?"

Dino left his bush. "Serena, you're practically family! You understand that? The last few years haven't been smooth; but you've always been there for me; so I'll be there for you. Alright? I don't hate you, and I never will. So get out of that bush, and I'll give you a ride back to CEDEF."

I stepped out of the bush slowly. "Dino...thanks." I quickly pulled away and wiped my eyes dry with my sleeve.

Dino put a hand on my shoulder. "This isn't your blood is it?"

I shook my head silently.

He grinned, sensing my depression. "Come on, let's go set of fireworks or something."

* * *

><p>As the year passed, I became determined to find a reason, or a loop hole to see the Varia again. I spent every spare second scouring information on Mafia laws and the Vindice.<p>

**Twelve is totally a lucky number now.**

The last few days of school trickled by, and I was determined to make my twelfth birthday happy. Dino and I planned to go to our elementary school festival, which was more of a marketing ploy – rides, food, games, stalls; that sort of stuff. But I was excited - I'd never really got to making friends in high school; and this seemed like a good opportunity to see how my old friends had changed.

"Why don't you have a go at that shooting stall?" Dino asked cheerfully, snow cone in one hand.

"Not bothered. The prizes aren't that good either. I mean, a coupon to a laundromat?" I pointed out dully. "Why don't you go on the teacups?"

He smiled nervously. "I just ate a ton of junk food. I can't say how my stomach will take it..."

We walked around the fields a bit more, until we came across a playground.

"Oh no..." I whispered. "I remember those monkey bars. I broke my wrist right there...I thought I'd fail my entrance exam."

Dino grinned. "I gotta say, that was probably the luckiest day of my life."

"Lucky?" I asked incredulously. "Really? How on earth is having a three year old falling on top you 'lucky'?"

"Coz nine years later, I can walk by and remember the day I met the most annoying person in the world," Dino sighed, touching the bars easily.

"Dino! Holy shit man – you're so...tall!" It was one of his classmates. I decided to leave him to talk guy to guy, and I sat down on the fake grass floor. Elementary school. The short period of my life that was cut too short.

"Is that you, Serena?" a surprised voice asked.

I looked above, to see my old friend, Solte. "Hey! How's life?" I asked, a smile tugging at the edges of my mouth.

"Ha! Years pass, and you still can't think of a new greeting to say to me. Life's not bad," he added, sitting beside me. "I make rings these days. Mafia family inheritance stuff. It's a stable job. You?"

"Well...you want the sugar-coated version, or the truth?" I muttered.

"Sugar coated version should work just fine. But let me guess first – pianist?"

_I wish_. "Nope. Guess again. Think more violent."

"Uh...butcher?" he offered.

I rolled my eyes. "You honestly think I'm a butcher?"

"Hey! My imagination only goes so far. What do you do?"

"Assassin."

A bit of silence passed between us. "Cool," he finally smiled, though there wasn't much emotion behind it. "Oh, and did you hear about M.M? She's in prison now!" he exasperated. "Can you believe it? And I thought the three of us could hang out like old times today..." he sighed. "How's the family?"

I decided to tell him the truth, without revealing too much. "I got a restraining order from my brother. Sooo annoying."

He raised an eyebrow. "So...your bro who really liked you put a _restraining _order on you? Why?"

"Oh no – he didn't do it, the Ninth did that."

"The Ninth...as in the Vongola Ninth?" he muttered, his expression turning into disbelief.

"Yeah. Him. I wish he'd just go burn in hell sometimes. Old hag."

"Ah huh..."

"Die Cavallone, in the name of love!" another familiar voice yelled. I looked up. And groaned.

It was Bianchi. And she was trying to kill Dino. She threw another plate of some weird looking food, and Dino ducked. Part of the playground melted. WTF?

"Bianchi!" I called out, trying to get her attention. But she seemed focused on Dino. So I had to literally jump between the two of them. "Woah Bianchi, you can't kill him," I said, trying to speak calmly.

She faltered for a few seconds. "Se – Serena? Get away from him! If he dies, I can be with Reborn!"

*Facepalm*. So the baby she was obsessed with was Reborn. Of course. Brilliant. "You can't kill him, Bianchi. Please."

"Move aside, Serena."

All right. The only thing that got through to Bianchi was love right? Time to lie. "Bianchi...I...I love him."

"What?" Bianchi, Dino, Solte, and everyone else in plain sight spluttered. All right, even for Dino, I could keep up with a lie like that.

"As a friend!" I spoke louder. "Nothing romantic. I swear. But don't kill him, Bianchi," I pleaded.

She harrumphed. "Fine. For the sake of love. Or friendship. Whatever."

The air turned cold, and I turned around.

Vindice.

It was as if the festival had a mute button as the three guards stood in front of us.

"Serena di Squalo..." one of them rasped.

Just hearing my name made me tired. "Oh really. Me. I haven't done anything fucking wrong! Why the hell are you here?" I yelled, completely forgetting that they were prison guards to the world's worst prison. "Don't you have better things to do, than float around and piss off little girls?"

"We require your...presence." One of them raised a hand, and suddenly the whole place became dark and misty. There was a tugging feeling in my gut, and suddenly I was in an office of some sort.

"Oi! Take me back!" I hollered angrily, but they were no longer there.

"Um...are you Serena di Squalo?" a nervous voice asked from behind the desk. I looked in his direction. First thought: unimpressive. His clothes may've looked classy, but he was obviously terrible at his job. Whatever his job was.

"What's it to you?" I scowled, going for the door. Immediately, a Vindice guard appeared before me.

"You cannot leave."

"And why might that be?"

The guy behind the desk coughed. "Well, you're here for the reading of the last testament of Kazuya and Ksenia Squalo."

It took me a while to comprehend the names. I'd rarely heard my parents' names even when they were alive, five ago. My Dad had been half Japanese, half Italian. My Mom's heritage was highly multicultural. My ancestors had been from all over the world.

I still remembered the day they died like it was yesterday. But my brain found a piece of information that didn't quite make sense. "Their will was meant to be read out the day my brother turned eighteen. That was six months ago," I remembered. "Why the hell am I six months late in hearing whatever shit my parents ever wanted to tell me?"

The guy pulled at the collar of his shirt nervously. "Well...you see, the solicitor that your parents initially contacted died three years ago, from a heart attack. So we've only just found your parents' will. Should I start now?"

Angrily, I let myself calm down, and sat down on the chair in front of him.

"Here goes...'In life, there are many things that cannot be changed or stopped. Death, for instance. Superbi, Serena, if you're listening to this, it means that we are dead. It also means that you've both grown up, and survived. And that's all that matters. Because that means for the period of time that we've left you alone, you've made important decisions on your own, whatever they may've been.'" The guy paused for a few seconds, and examined my face for any change in emotion. Nothing.

"Is that it?" I questioned, yawning. I didn't want to sound terrible, but I couldn't say if they'd made the right decision. _We _made terrible decisions in their place.

"Uh no...there's more. 'Superbi, we hope you grow to be a man worth his honor, who takes pride in his actions. Serena, open your eyes. The world is a big place. We hope that one day, you will both settle down, and start your own families. The house goes to the both of you, and the money is split evenly. But what's important, is that the two of you stay together, because your bond is something money can't buy. Farewell.' Um... that's it."

Open your eyes. The world is a big place. Settle down. No problem. 'What's important, is that the two of you stay together.' _Hate to break it to you, Mom and Dad, but you're kinda four years too late for that. _

There was a lot of noise in the room beside me, and it sounded a lot like a 'voi'. "Oi, solicitor dude, is my brother in that room?" I asked suspiciously.

"I...I think so. But the creepy people in the top hats said that - "

Within a second, I jumped up from the chair and pulled out my sword.

"What –what the hell do you think you're doing?" he squeaked.

I didn't answer. This was the closest I'd been to Squalo since...well, it felt like forever. And now, there was only brick wall between us. Just as I was about to swing, the Vindice guard reappeared. "If you break down that wall, I will imprison you and the Varia in Vindice..." he threatened, a chain appearing in his hands. So that's why he was here.

Forcing myself to think positive, I managed to put the sword back in its sheath. I missed a few time though, and ended up stabbing my own hand a few times.

"As the legal owner of my house, I have the right to visit, correct?" I asked the Vindice guard.

"I must accompany you," it/he/humanoid being/she answered.

"Great. Can you do the portal thingy?"

* * *

><p>When I blinked, I was back in my house. The Vindice guard stayed at the gate, so I shrugged and left him there.<p>

Besides the dust; it was almost as if I was still a seven year old coming home from school. It seemed no one had bothered visiting after our parents died. The fridge had become overgrown with mold. My parents' room was a mess, as if they'd done some last minute packing. I suppose they had.

There was a spider in the bathroom, and I decided that it wasn't necessary to check that out. In the living room, Squalo's overdue library book stared at me in the face. There were a few family portraits, and I took them from their frames.

I moved to my own room. The bed was...so small. I must've really been a midget. Well, more midgety. The piano was out of tune, and my random scribbles no longer made any sense. That was depressing.

And lastly, I went to Squalo's room. It was relatively tidy; as it always had been. There were a few books on chess and swords, but I was surprised to see he kept a notebook with the words 'epic stuff'. It was old. There were weapons designs, and a regular doodles.

I sat down on his bed, and thought about my first day of CEDEF. Had it really been so long ago? _From this day forth, you will live in CEDEF headquarters. You are not allowed any contact with the Varia, or pass messages of any sort._ That still felt like a death sentence. And as an idiot who didn't realize the full deal, I'd answered completely carefree.

"If I say no, do I still get to contact them?"

My childish words echoed in my mind. Iemitsu had ignored me when I asked that. Did that mean that was true? If I didn't understand, then I'd be able to see them. Suddenly a plan formed, the pieces clicking together quickly. Squalo would probably visit our house as well right?

I flipped his notebook to the page with my birthday card. _I'm not writing a message. I'm not contacting him. I'm making a note to myself, in someone else's notebook. _Finding the flashiest pen on his desk, I scribbled 'thanks for waiting.' I left the book open, and left my house. I took one last look, and the Vindice guard sent me back to the fair, where Dino was talking to Reborn.

"I can't do it," he choked. "I know you want me to be the boss and everything; but I'm not ready. I can barely look after myself; much less 5000 families!"

"Dino, your father will be dead by the end of the year. The doctors just confirmed it, and there is nothing you can do to save him. You must take the position as boss." _  
><em>

"I don't want to! I'm just a kid!" he complained, standing up abruptly, and he almost walked into me. "Oh. Serena. You're back."

"Do you care for your family?" I asked. "Everyone in the Cavallone? Even the maids and servants?"

He sighed, and looked away. "That's a stupid question Serena. Let's go."

"If you could, would you protect them?"

"I – I...no. Yes! No...well yes," he finally said indecisively. "I would if I could. But I can't. I'm useless, stupid and weak."

I slapped him. "Then become useful! Study! Train! Whether you like it or not, they're you're family, and you'll be the one to protect them!" I barked, grabbing him by his shirt. It wasn't as effective as I hoped, since I was shorter than him. "You have the chance, Dino. Don't just throw it away." My voice cracked with the last few words, and I let go of his shirt. "Sorry."

"You're right. Thanks Serena," he muttered.

"Great. Now you can give me a lift to CEDEF." I grinned and started dragging him to his car (a ferrari). "And today, I'll teach you how to drive," I decided, motioning for Romario to get out of the driver's seat.

"Wha – you can't even drive!" Dino complained. "And I've never had a single driving lesson in my life!"

*Eyes flash darkly* "Then we can either learn together, or die together. Sound like fun?"

Reborn smirked behind the two. He liked Serena's new attitude.

* * *

><p><em>Three months later...<em>

I gulped down some water. Okay. I'd planned everything down to the last detail.

"You ready?" Shamal asked, balancing a baseball bat in his hands.

I can't believe I requested the guy who tried to kill me, to help me. "Yep. Go for it dude."

WHACK.

* * *

><p>Darkness. After what felt like a few minutes, I heard someone sigh, and the sound of someone snapping their fingers. My mind opened into the image of a posh office, and I was sitting on a chair, looking at the back of the other person's chair. "Mu ha ha ha...remember me?" a girl's voice cackled evilly. *Chair spins around to reveal person*.<p>

A few seconds passed.

*The person was so fail, the chair keeps on spinning*.

Of course I recognized the girl. It was Alexandra Knight. The person who ruined my childhood dreams. "Get out. You ruined my life," I grumbled. It was true enough - she was partially responsible for every bad thing that had happened. "Who the hell are you?"

She shrugged, readjusting the chair. "Ah yes. I thought you might ask. You remember...the first time I showed up?" she asked, straining to remember.

"You were in front of me, I reached out, but it was a mirror," I offered.

"And what did you think of it?" she questioned triumphantly. "I thought that explained everything."

"Um...no? I thought it was a hyperactive imagination. I still think this is my hyperactive imagination," I stated bluntly.

"Oh really? And what about when things from your dreams start to happen in reality?" she smiled darkly.

I didn't answer.

"So here's the deal: you shut up for the next five minutes, and I explain everything. So here's how it goes; I'm not from this world."

I rolled my eyes. "I think I figured out that much."

"BUT, I'm still from Earth." She put up a finger to stop me from arguing. "Just not this one. You see, back in my world, there was this anime manga thing called 'Kateikyoushi Hitman Reborn'. I was a total fangirl – and then, one night, I make a stupid wish that I was in that world. Then WHABAM! I get born into another world. _This _world."

Blink.

"There are many things in common between my world and yours; the science, the celebrities, the basic idea of human life. What differs, is that you're world has a completely different crime and mafia system, which affects the survival of your world."

I coughed. "Remind me, which world are you from again? Coo-coo land, or nutjob land?"

She sighed. "All right. You know the basis or parallel world right? How every action branches off, like a tree?"

Nod.

"Well, I'm from a different tree. Got it?"

"Uh...sure. So what are you doing in my head again?" I queried.

She took a second to think. "In my world, your world is considered a fantasy. But your world affects mine. I mean like, say I'm doing my final test, but I didn't get enough sleep because I was reading KHR manga over and over coz it was too epic. KHR being Kateikyoushi Hitman Reborn. Say I had the potential to become a billionaire, but instead got a job as a doctor and created a vaccine that saved the world. You get it?"

_Really weird example_. "A little."

"Ack. Now, you blame yourself for the whole crib incident. You're totally right to blame yourself."

"Oh, gee, thanks. I totally feel all cheered up now."

Glare. "That's because without YOU, it would've never happened."

"I think that's why I got took responsibility in the first place," I added. "Years ago."

She ignored that. "Now, you don't actually exist in my world's version of KHR. The bottom line is: you've gotta make sure that _everything_ that happens in your world, is the same as the version in my world."

"Look, I don't really want to sound terrible and all, but I DON'T GIVE THE SHIT ABOUT YOUR WORLD. It can crash and burn for all I care!" I roared. "It's got nothing to do with me!"

"It's got _everything _to do with you. The version of KHR from my world, is the only one in which everyone lives 'happily ever after'. If the crib incident never happened, and Xanxus won, he would've dominated the world, yes? And how would that have gone? Massacre after massacre? Who knows; he might've even killed you if his steak was too tough one day."

She did have a point there. "So you couldn't go disrupt anyone else's mind? It had to be 'me'?"

"You...are an oddity in science."

"Oh gee, thanks."

"No – not like that. I mean...you were never meant to exist."

"That's just _so _much better."

She sighed. "Don't you ever shut up? Just listen. Squalo was meant to grow up as an only child. But then, he would've never joined the Varia. So your existence is good. It's handy. And efficient."

_I don't believe it. She's describing me like a tool._

"But above all, it's necessary. For the survival of both our worlds. I made that wish the same time the universe accidentally came up with you; so naturally we got put together. Technically, I _am _you. But I'm not you. Get it?"

Now, if anyone's ever had the 'where do babies come from' talk with their parents, they'd think that the world just cursed them. Well, this talk was even worse. Basically, I was telling myself that I was an oddity in the universe, and the fate of the world was in my hands.

"So...what do you want me to do?" I finally said, dejectedly.

"Just continue with life. Pretend that we never had this talk."

"And how the hell am I meant to do that?"

She shrugged. "I dunno. Might help you stay sane though. Most of your decisions should be pretty smooth, and most of the things that happen should fall into place. I'm telling you all this, so when the time comes and you don't know what to do, you'll at least know what the result should be. You remember everything I showed you?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

"Then you'll be fine. You should wake up now."

"Wait!" I called. "How am I meant to do all this shit? I'm just some person with a bunch of disorders!"

"You have ADHD, dyslexia, autism, and bad senses in general. Right? Well it's not actually your fault. I kinda tried hijacking your body the one time, and it kinda left a few compatibility errors," she stated as if it wasn't a big deal. "On the brighter side, you're not affected by poisons, right?"

"...What?"

"Mmm... Now, you've lost your memories, but I'll make sure it's only temporary. Have fun. I hope you succeed in what you're trying to accomplish." She snapped her fingers, and with that, the world faded to darkness yet again.

* * *

><p><strong>Belphegor P.O.V.<strong>

Bel was feeling moody. The Varia's planes had been damaged, and they hadn't been able to hire any, so he was forced to take a public plane. Disgusting. Sure, it was first class and everything, but it was degrading. And there was actually a _schedule_.

All of this for a stupid mission in Hong Kong. Giving in his ticket, he strolled onto the completely packed plane, and wandered into the first class section – which was completely empty. Well...there was one person, who was already asleep. As he walked by he glanced – and frowned. It was Serena.

But that wasn't possible. The Vindice would've arrested him by now. Unless it wasn't Serena. Of course, it was just a look alike. That must've been it.

He took his seat, and shortly after, the plane took off. It was an eleven hour flight. In the first few hours, he watched T.V. and ate a mountain of snacks. Just as he was starting to get bored, there was a groan behind him. Seeing as there was only one other person in the cabin, Bel ignored it.

"Wow. My head hurts. Am I in a plane? Cool."

There were sounds of stumbling, and before he knew it, the girl was beside him.

"Oh hi. Do you know where this plane goes?" she asked.

"Hong Kong," Bel answered, not looking at her. If she wasn't Serena, she was just a stupid peasant. There was some turbulence, and she lost her balance, falling on top of him. "Watch it peasant!" he warned.

"Ow..." she muttered, completely ignoring him, clutching her head.

And then Bel saw it. A shark pendant necklace. Then it _was _Serena. So why the weird behavior? And where was the Vindice?

"You're very good looking," she observed unintelligently, staring at him. "I like the tiara. Are you a prince?"

"Who are you?" Bel shot back, pushing her off him, and onto the floor.

"You know, now that you mention it, I can't remember my name," she muttered, massaging the back of her head. It seemed swollen.

Suddenly, everything made sense. It was Serena. But she had amnesia. So it wasn't her. Same body, different mind. If she couldn't remember who she was, she was no longer Serena di Squalo.

He needed to contact that stupid long hair commander.

* * *

><p><strong>If you've read to this point, CONGRATULATIONS!<strong>

**Have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	17. Graduation

**Thanks for the support so far. You see, I made an equation.**

**Reviews/favorites/alerts = Happy Author**

**Happy Author does not necessarily update on time. =_="**

**Falcone Kaerva - I wish I could speak so many languages...but no. I can speak a few decently, and use Google Translate as a last resort. **

**Oh, and since I never made it clear, Serena loses her memory because she pays Shamal to whack her in the head with a baseball bat. *Just so it's out there.***

**Anyways, please enjoy :]**

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 17 - Graduation<span>

There were some things that never changed, in Bel's thoughts and imagination. Serena was one of those things. Or so, that was what Bel _originally _thought. Memory or no memory, playing first person shooter games was still as fun as he'd imagined it. But still, some things did seem to change. Like when the breakfast tray was coming round.

"Dumbass. Hurry up and eat," Bel ordered, already on his fourth croissant. It was a surprise he kept his lean figure.

"What is 'eat'?" she asked, completely baffled. Serena was staring at a piece of toast like it was the most amazing thing in the world.

At that moment, Bel felt like the father of a two year old. He finally respected Squalo for successfully raising a sister once. And yet, the stupid commander had offered no help at all. A replay of their telephone conversation:

"_VOI! Stop shitting with me! Get back to work!"_

So Bel put Serena on. "What is this contraption? Does it hold some sort of a spirit?"

"_S-Serena? Is that you?"_

"Who is this Serena you speak of? Do I know you? Oh – don't tell me – you're God right? Forgive me father, for I have sinned! Don't you just love that line? You must hear it a lot these days."

Answering questions with questions. Bel took the phone. "So, Captain, what's the plan?"

"_I'll be in Hong Kong in twenty hours. Complete your mission. The moment she realizes who she really is; is the moment we're all screwed. Do not let anything happen to her."_

*End of call*

Just remembering their conversation made Bel thud a knife into the wooden table. The stupid trash-shark didn't realize how much of a death sentence that was. Serena was still staring at toast. On an act of impatience, Bel grabbed a few slices from her plate, and shoved it in her mouth.

"There. Eat. Chew. Swallow. Whatever."

* * *

><p><em>The Following Day...<em>

'Belphezar, I can't breathe,' was the phrase that Bel woke up to. The voice belonged, of course, to one Serena di Squalo.

Just God damn brilliant.

Bel didn't tell her his real name; in case Serena _did _by some chance recover her memory. Since he only realized that fact halfway through saying his name; the new name 'Belphezar', was hence born.

Thinking back to the previous day, he clearly recalled knocking her out and dragging her to the hotel he was staying at. Being an epic assassin and all, only a couple hundred people stared at him. Once at the hotel, he dumped on the bed, and later seemed incapable of getting her off. Of course, since he was a prince, there was no way he was going to sleep on the couch or the floor.

Same bed. Two genders. Of course there was nothing disturbing about that.

Which only left the question of why the he lying on top of her, drooling.

"Wow, you're a really heavy burden, Belphezar."

"Oi. Peasant. Go take a shower," he finally spoke.

*Stares blankly*

"Take off your clothes, go into that room, turn the tap, and stand underneath the water," Bel sighed.

*Starts taking off clothes on bed*

"I mean take off your clothes _inside_ the..." Bel trailed off, shutting his eyes. He mentally slapped himself. _No. Can't look. Not this girl. _

Her clueless voice drifted over to him, echoing from the bathroom. "Belphezar, what's a 'tap'?"

*Facepalm*

Bel had to go work/assassinate, so he had no choice to leave Serena alone. It was risky, but it wasn't as if there was a better option. There were still a couple hours before Squalo got to Hong Kong, anyways.

There were too many dangerous things in the hotel (eg. Serena fell out of the window), so he left her in a public toilet. The female bathroom was too busy, and he was a guy (the word _prince _implied that), so he cut her hair and convinced her that she was actually born a guy. Since she was in a weird state, she believed it.

"Yo peasant, don't leave this cubicle okay?" he half threatened and half instructed. Bel wanted to leave as soon as possible – the person in the next cubicle must've eaten something god awful.

"Whatever you say, Belphezar."

"And no talking to strangers."

"No strangers. Sure."

* * *

><p>I was sitting on the toilet seat, trying to keep my mind blank. Blankness. Clear thoughts. Calm, serene things. Waves on a beach, a potato being peeled in slow motion. That sort of stuff.<p>

But I couldn't help wondering _why _I was trusting Belphezar. I mean...technically I didn't even know the guy. I didn't even know myself. What if he was the bad guy? Maybe he was coming back to kill me?

A mini angel popped up on one shoulder."Of course you can trust Belphezar. He's a reliable guy. Even though he like what, knocked you out for a few hours yesterday," it shrugged.

Then a devil popped up on the other, whispering into my ear. "Is that even his real name? What business could he possibly have - and leaving you in a filthy public toilet like that?"

The angel rolled its eyes. "Honestly. That guy? THAT guy?"

"Which guy?" I muttered.

"That devil dude. Unbelievable. Shows up every time to mess up my argument. Bel's a good guy. You're friends, remember?"

Friends? Bel? Wasn't his name Belphezar?

"Aha! That angel is trying to trick you. Clouding over your thoughts like that. Belphezar's real name is Belphe_gor_, and he's an assassin."

"An assassin...?" I murmured. Oddly enough, I knew what that was - the moment I'd made the connection, the mini-angel and devil disappeared. O_oooookay, I got into some creepy weird shit._

I unlocked the cubicle, and ran out into the open street...or rather, a mall. The faces of happy shoppers surrounded me like a pack of piranhas. So I wandered further and further away. Pieces of my memory started to click - logos, pictures, words.

It was freezing outside. Was it winter? According to the newspaper, it was. I was wearing shorts and a t-shirt. How did I even read the language? My headache began to worsen after a few minutes, just about when my toes went numb.

About half an hour later, I came to a not-so-nice part of the city. At that point, I was hoping for some kind crazy lady to be miraculously sitting on their balcony in this weather, offering me a hot drink.

"Hey kid, you need a place to stay?"

I turned my head to face a guy smoking a cigarette, looking pretty damn warm with multiple layers of clothing. "What's it to you?" I asked slightly bitterly.

"Do you, or do you not?" he shot back with a smile.

My hopes of finding a crazy old lady were diminishing. "Sure," I lied, secretly wanting to return to the restroom.

"Come with me." He started leaving.

_Don't listen to the stranger. Go back to the fricking bathroom. _"Shut up brain," I told myself, following the man. I mean, what did I have to lose? I didn't know anything about myself.

We made a few turns, and ended up in a suspicious looking alley. Extremely suspicious. At the end of that, was a truck.

"Get in the back."

I wasn't sure if I heard clearly. A siren began to wail in the distance. "Why?"

Without asking for further confirmation, he picked me up, despite my struggles, and threw me into the back of the truck. I could hear the locks click shut and the engine starting. The truck was nowhere near warm, but it wasn't freezing like outside. So slowly, I began to feel again - I was sitting in a puddle?

Drawing my hand to my face, I almost screamed. It was blood. Human blood. How I knew; I had no idea - but I was absolutely certain.

_I should've totally stayed in the bathroom..._

* * *

><p>After what seemed like a lifetime, the back of the truck opened, and light streamed in. I gasped. The whole truck was filled with dead bodies. It was terrible.<p>

"Who...who are you?" I spat out, disgusted. I didn't even know why I was disgusted.

He looked at me, and for the first time, I noticed how his eyes weren't quite...there. They seemed empty and cold. "Kid, you see those dead bodies? I dispose of them. I even get paid to do it. And afterwards..." he licked his lips. "Children taste the best."

It took me a few seconds to remember I was a guy now. According to Belphegor. But focusing on the current situation, the words somehow came to my mouth. "You're a cannibal."

"Yep! Though I had a terrible catch today. All grown ups. And then you walked into the scene. I was going to kill you back in the city, but I thought the police might catch up." He pulled out a knife. "Stay still. This will only hurt...a lot."

Scrambling to my feet, I tried to run, but I was trapped. He forced me to the wall of the truck and attempted to stab me, but I caught his arm as the tip of the knife hovered above my eye. We stayed frozen in that position for a tense second before he withdrew the knife. "I have an idea. If I kill you while you're not struggling, then rigor mortis won't set in – meaning you won't be all stringy for breakfast..."

What could I say? Don't eat me?

Ignoring my feeble attempts to get away, he dragged me into an empty building. He bound my hands together, and tied them to the top rail in a conveyor belt. He tied the other dead bodies in front of me. There were twelve others. I was thirteenth.

"Tomorrow morning, this conveyer belt will start moving," he told me with a grin. He turned and left, leaving me with a line of dead bodies, just waiting to decompose.

I hoped silently for a miracle.

* * *

><p><em>Somewhere on the other side of Hong Kong...<em>

"VOI! You left her in a _male _bathroom?" Squalo raged, swinging his sword violently. "You left her in _this _male bathroom?"

"It seemed like a good idea at the time..." Bel muttered, looking at the empty cubicle. "You know she really does look like a guy if you cut her hair short. She's like mini version of you."

"She's my sister idiot!" Squalo pointed out angrily. "Where the fuck is she?"

Bel thought. If Serena left, it either meant that someone kidnapped her, or she left on her own accord. The lock on the toilet was fine, so she'd probably remembered something, and left for whatever reason her brain saw fit. "Well, there's only about seven million people in Hong Kong. We'll find her in no time." Bel turned and started to leave.

"Seven million is a LOT of people you fucktard!" Squalo growled, waving his sword/arm. "When was the last time you searched the _whole_ of Hong Kong?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...yesterday."

"VOI! That was rhetorical!"

"She's probably just wandering around. If we walk around long enough, we'll probably just bump into her," Bel speculated.

"Oh for crying out - "

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...it's not like you have a better idea, Captain," Bel pointed out.

"Shut up Bel."

* * *

><p>I was woken up by the sound of something mechanical. My memory was hazy. As my senses stabilized, I felt the stiffness of having my arms raised above my head for a night. There was a high pitched whine, and the first body on the conveyor belt was neatly sliced into two. Blood splattered over the floor. As my mind connected the dots, I started screaming with words I never even knew were in my vocabulary.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Not so far away...<em>

"It's sunrise..." Squalo sighed, crossing his arms. "This is the last district we haven't searched. What are the chances that she's here?"

"Tch. You are a sour puss, aren't you?" Bel grumbled, walking casually with his arms folded behind his head.

"Hey, you're Varia right?" a shady man with a cigarette noticed, calling to Bel. "Got any dead bodies you want me to dispose of?"

"Shut up. We don't want to hear it," Squalo informed, continuing walking.

"Come on," he continued, motioning somewhere on his arm. "Free body disposal service here! How about annoying children in your neighborhood? I can dispose of them too. "

Bel stopped. "Well, unless it's a kid about this high with short hair, that color *gestures at Squalo's hair*, then I don't want to hear it. Savvy?"

"Hm...does he look foreign? Little girlish? Hair like your girlfriend's? Then it's not a problem anymore," he concluded, with a smile.

"VOI! I'm a guy!" Squalo yelled, brandishing his sword.

"Just ignore the bitch."

"Bitch?!"

"So when did you pick up this guy?" Bel snapped.

"Yesterday. Should be dead shortly," the man considered. "Looks tasty, that one. Lean."

Within a second, Squalo had the man pinned on the floor. "Where did you take the kid? VOI! Spit it out!"

"Just a slaughter house few blocks down. We can share?" he offered. "Twenty-eighty? Fifty-fifty?"

Squalo decapitated him. "A hundred-zero."

* * *

><p>I decided to chew off my hands. But that was before I remembered my arms were hoisted up in the air and I couldn't even hope reach them. I was frustrated. Ten bodies cut up into tiny pieces. Only two were in front of me.<p>

Tugging helplessly as the eleventh body was cut into two, I tried to think of a happy place. But everything that came into mind had a bunch of dancing organs. I swore some more.

The body in front of me split. I stared at the saw in front of my face. Oddly, I started remembering lines from Romeo and Juliet. I sighed. "Ask for me tomorrow, and you shall find me a grave man..."

But before I could blink, there was a clink, and my hands were free. Someone dragged me off the conveyor belt. "VOI! What are you thinking?!" a loud voice boomed.

"I did say not to talk to strangers..." Bel shrugged, appearing in my line of sight. "Told you it's her. And she totally has amnesia."

"Oh Belphegor. Ohayo," I spoke softly. I suppose I was still in shock.

"What do we do?" Bel asked, nudging me with one foot.

"How the hell am I meant to know?" Squalo exclaimed. "Did you have to leave her alone?"

"Oh so what – you wanted me to take her with me while I killed that tycoon?" Bel argued back, crossing his arms. "Weren't you the one who said to keep her safe? I ended jumping out of the window."

"Big deal! One jump!" Squalo growled. "It's better than cut in half and eaten by a cannibal!"

"I jumped off the hundred and fortieth floor..." Bel added. "And what are you complaining about? She's still alive, isn't she? So what are we going to do now?"

"I don't know!" Squalo said once more, impatient.

"Tch. Serena was right. I should've just killed her the day I met her..." Bel sighed. "You want to dump her at the Italian embassy?"

"VOI! Are you crazy? We're all on Hong Kong's most wanted list! If we go there, everyone's just gonna run out screaming their assess off!" Squalo yelled, swing his sword around in frustration. "And if she remembers who we are, she's screwed! We're screwed!"

"But she just called me 'Belphegor'. I don't see any Vindice about," Bel muttered, thinking. "She probably hasn't fully recovered her memory yet. Which means we should just ditch her."

"We can't ditch her!" Squalo bellowed. "You left her alone for a couple of hours and she ends up here!"

"And why not?" Bel argued back. "Maybe she can just start over without us in her stupid life, whatever she ends up with. Don't you think that's a better idea?"

"No!"

"Why not? Is it because you're afraid to lose your 'baby' sister'?" Bel almost sniggered.

There was a pause, and I thought it might be a good idea to remind them of my presence. I felt like I was hearing things I shouldn't have. "I'm sorry I doubted you Belphegor. I should've listened. Talking to strangers was a bad idea."

"Oi dumbass. Know who that guy is?" Bel asked, directing my head to the tall guy with a sword on his arm.

Thinking. Thinking. Thinking. Nope. I dropped my voice to a whisper. "He's really good looking, don't you think? Oh wow, you're pretty good looking too Belphegor. Do you guys work out a lot or something? Ooh! Let me guess. You're models."

*Awkward moment*.

"Oi Bel...I think she's not quite herself..." Squalo finally said, mustering up his voice.

"I...I second that..." Bel stuttered weakly. And just listening to Serena give him a compliment was...the weirdest thing ever. It didn't suit her face, her expression, her voice...it was just...un-Serena-like...

Squalo used sign language to ask '_is she fucking crazy?'_.

Bel was answered with a shrug. "The Ninth can help us with this," he decided sourly.

* * *

><p><em>On a REALLY expensive jet...<em>

"I don't like you. I hate you. A lot. You should go kill yourself."

Now, being the Ninth boss of the Vongola family, he was used to those lines. But it still seemed odd coming out of a twelve year old girl who had more swagger than a drunk.

"You brat! I'll kill you!" his right hand man growled, advancing.

The Ninth sighed. He always found himself sighing when it came to Serena. "Coyote. Please restrain yourself." Even in his own personal jet, with his seven guardians within twenty feet of him, he still felt uneasy with Bel and Squalo. "So. Explain why you asked me to fly from my holiday in Mafia Island to Hong Kong."

Squalo nudged Bel to talk. Bel nudged Squalo. It became a nudge war.

"ANY one of you two will do just fine..." the Ninth reasoned, growing slightly impatient. "I have no idea, _why _the two of you and...what I believe to be Serena are in such close quarters without the Vindice barging in. Why don't you start from there?"

Squalo nudged Bel. Bel nudged Squalo. They glared at each other, then started talking in unison. "Serena was on a plane from Italy to Hong Kong, and Bel/I just happened to be there. Because she lost her memories, she's not exactly Serena di Squalo."

"And she has no idea who she is?" the Ninth asked with a little nod in Serena's direction.

"She's remembering bits and pieces. But she's still missing the whole puzzle."

"And you took her drinking?" the Ninth questioned, interlocking his fingers in his lap.

Squalo and Bel shared a look. "I think she's just fatigued," Squalo explained as logically as he could.

"And what do you want me to do about her?" The final question was like a death sentence. "I'm not sure if you're aware, gentlemen, but I am a busy person. I don't have the time to - "

"YOU!" I stormed, standing up. I remembered now. The hate suddenly returned. "You are a rat basta - "

"Sit down..." Squalo whispered hurriedly, using one hand to shove me back into my seat.

"NO! I WILL NOT FUCKING SIT DOWN SQUALO! IT'S BECAUSE OF THIS RAT BASTARD THAT I HAD TO FRICKING ASK SHAMAL TO WHACK ME WITH A GOD DAMN BASEBALL BAT TO GET THE CHANCE TO SEE YOU!" I interrupted in a voice that would've made Squalo proud (*cough* actually, he seemed more surprised than proud).

"Serena! You're normal..." Squalo announced to himself.

"Squalo!" I squealed, and tackled him with a hug. "Why're you so tall?!"

"And you're still a midget..." he remarked good naturedly, but there was an awkward touch.

The Ninth cleared his throat. "Sorry to interrupt your reunion, but - "

A portal opened, and a Vindice guard came through. The Ninth groaned. "Oh for crying out - "

"Serena di Squalo...you have broken the law - "

"No, I haven't," I interjected, stepping up. "Because I changed my name very recently to Serena di-_ella_ Squalo, and the document to change my name back is still processing. It'll be about...a week. All your stupid documents have the name 'Serena di Squalo' on them," I declared.

"But you are still the same person..."

I rolled my eyes. "If you're going for that approach, my personality's completely changed. Humans are constantly changing."

"That matters not to the Vindice..."

"Serena, Squalo, Belphegor, please go downstairs while I discuss matters with the Vindice," the Ninth said with a partially flat voice.

"Lovely." I strolled down the aisle and tripped down the stairs – but Squalo caught me before I hit the floor.

"All right Serena. Start explaining," he demanded. "Did you plan all of this?"

I pondered for a moment. "Most of it, yes. It pretty much happened as I predicted. Except for a few scenes and acts which were completely unnecessary. I mean, how stupid does the guy have to be to dump a girl in a guy's bathroom and tell her to stay put?"

Bel spluttered. "You put me through all that for your own entertainment?"

"Own entertainment? Kinda..." I muttered innocently. _I just wanted to see you again..._

"Well...why bother going to Hong Kong and everything dumbass?" Bel pointed out. "You could've just done this in Italy."

"THAT, is because I know Italy like the back of my hand. Too many memory triggers," I shrugged. "And plus, I always wanted the opportunity to call the Ninth a rat bastard, and kinda get away with it."

Squalo put his hands on my shoulders. "You act like a psychotic secret criminal mastermind."

*Shatters* _I don't believe it. That was the first serious line he said to me in over four years._

* * *

><p>"I'm sorry. Didn't quite hear that one right. Come again?"<p>

"One of you...must go to the lowest level of Vindice...for six months..."

His raspy voice was really getting to me. Probably smoked a few too many cigarettes. "Fine. I'll go," Squalo and I said in unison. "No, me. You stay," we continued in unison. "You're more important. I don't even mind going to prison."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you could always both go," Bel offered.

"Shut up Bel. Squalo, if you stay in Vindice for six months, the Varia will fall apart," I insisted. "I'll go. I have a lot to think over anyways. Like, you know, the next time I do this, so I can see you again."

"Serena, just - "

The Ninth coughed. "Well, now that you've brought that up, I'm willing to make another deal with you, Serena."

I sighed. I was already halfway into the Vindice portal thing. "At this rate, I never want to make a deal with you again. But I'll listen."

"If," he started all too slowly, "you are able to graduate from your school this year, you will be free to do as you like."

"Free," I repeated suspiciously. "So I can slaughter you like a pig, and nobody else has to die?"

"So long as you obey the head of the Vongola family."

"So - "

"You can't kill me."

_...That's actually really anti-climatic._ "And all the Varia, CEDEF stuff?"

"Technically, you never left the Varia; as for CEDEF - Iemitsu's orders come second to mine, but you must still obey. Understood?"

"And what if it's a Varia vs. CEDEF thing going on?"

"CEDEF comes above."

"...You know, I still don't see any freedom. Deal. Everybody here is a witness, blah blah blah, let's go."

"Serena, don't fucking be rash," Squalo complained. "Think this over. Can you really handle this shit? Graduating isn't as easy as nodding your head. You fail - that's it - you're dead. And mentally? You'll be alone, and well - I'm more...sane."

"I am being rash. Just promise me this. C-Can you c-come...c-come..."

"Just say it Serena."

"COME TO MY GRADUATION!" I screamed, forcing the words out with a little too much vigor.

Squalo stared me down, putting a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "Serena, I honestly wouldn't miss it for the world."

I jumped into the portal. I had nothing to lose.

* * *

><p><em>In a dark lonely place called Vindice...<em>

"Bermuda. Check out this kid..." Jager muttered.

"What is it, Jager-kun?" Bermuda asked, drifting over to the forementioned tank. _That's such a young face..._

"Looks like she has precognitive abilities or something. Her dreams...they're about the next Arcobaleno battle. It's soon. "

"Any link to Checkerface?"

"Yeah, he shows up at the end, just like we predicted."

"Looks like we found another interesting person."

* * *

><p><em>6 months later...<em>

"Back already?" Iemitsu sniffled, yawning. I struggled to maintain a poker face. "What a shame. It was really nice without you. Quiet. Peaceful. Relaxing. Enjoyable. I was hoping the Vindice might've extended your sentence just a little - "

*SNAP*

"SERENA-DONO!"

As I turned my facial expression was somewhat...mutated.

"Uh...I'm sorry..."

Basil's apology relaxed my facial nerves, somewhat. "No, I'm sorry, thought I was going to sneeze."

"...Oh." His hyperactive nature returned in an instant, and he begun shaking my arm (note: it wasn't even my hand). "It's so good to see you again! You look so healthy!"

_I was basically pickled for half a year..._

"Oh, good point Basil," Iemitsu continued, leaning back in his chair. "You look fat."

_...Fat?_

"What Iemitsu means," Lal cut in, "is that your body has had plenty of rest and nutrition. Looks like you can start training tomorrow."

*Groans* "I'm tiiiiiired."

Iemitsu spoke up before Lal could imprint the table with my face. "Oi Serena, go sleep or something. Now everyone - get out of my office."

"Oh, Serena-dono, your hair is cute," Basil mused, noticing my tousled hair. "See you later!"

* * *

><p>I see Basil 'later'. Maybe a few months later. You see, I'd only just managed to put on loose shirt and shorts when I was gagged and bound. Six months floating like a pickle had left me with some pretty messed up motor skills - since there was no alarm, I figured it was part of some elaborate plan and went along with the flow.<p>

And guess what was on the other side of the rainbow? A pot of gold? Pfft, when pigs fly. Just a sinister old leprechaun in his office.

"Ah, good morning Serena. How was your stay?" the Ninth asked sweetly.

"Exquisite. Was there even any need to kidnap me? You couldn't just go with the option of 'asking nicely'?" I shot back crabbily. "Well I'm sure you have no business with me so," I stood up slowly, "I'm just gonna go back to CEDEF."

One of his guardians shoved me back into the chair. "Serena, I understand Vindice is...a rough place to be," he started, clearly without much empathy. Or sympathy. "You have two months till your final exams. I've planned for you to recuperate somewhere more...natural. Fresh air, flowers, horses."

I had the image of an elderly paedophile gardener or a tent in the wilderness until: horses. Behind me, the doors opened, and the Ninth nodded a greeting.

"Ciao Miss. My name is Dino Cava – "

I snapped backwards so fast I fell out of the chair. "Dino?"

"Eh? Serena?" he muttered faintly. "Ninth - ?"

Nod.

_I was wrong. The fucking evil leprechaun was actually hoarding a fabulous, priceless pot of gold._

* * *

><p>Romario was driving, so Dino and I sat in the back seat. It was degrading to go through all that in pyjamas. Oh well. It's not like I had any dignity to lose in the first place.<p>

Dino seemed more serious than I remembered, but since none of his family's subordinates had called him 'Boss', I figured his Dad was still okay. "So Dino, what'd I miss?" I asked, lying down in his lap, hands behind my head.

"Woah, not so fast," Dino interjected disapprovingly. "Serena, you can't just disappear for what - half a year - and expect me to pretend nothing happened. How the hell did you end up in Vindice?!"

"But...but..."

He sighed. "All right, you probably can't tell me. Just...don't do anything you'll regret. Now," he cleared his throat, and his tone changed, "currently, the Cavallone family's got a few financial issues, but I'm working on it."

"You know, 'working progress' is just a fancy term for 'I got nothing' right?"

"I've got _something _Serena," he complained, blushing. "It just looks better in my head than it does in reality."

I raised an eyebrow, grinning. "Oh yeah? And what might this _something _be?"

"Extortion of the government."

Blink.

"Don't look at me like that!" he protested. "I mean like...they have all this money that don't give to the people and keep for themselves right?"

Blink.

He sighed. "Fine. I get it. It's stupid."

"Yeah it is. But I was actually just staring at that zit on your face."

"..."

"Don't worry, we think of something legit together," I smiled, closing my eyes.

"Legit? Come on, the mafia's not legit," he argued. "The reason the mafia exists is because we do illegal things."

I poked him in the gut. "The mafia originally was a vigilante group for the public. They provide the people with what they want - is that so wrong? Maybe they dabbled in a few unforgivable acts - but you can be the generation that has...less unforgivable stuff."

Romario laughed from the front. "If it counts for anything, I still like the extortion idea."

* * *

><p>The first time I went to the Cavallone mansion, I felt I'd stepped into something overly and unnecessarily luxurious. It still seemed overly annd unnecessarily luxurious - but also...kinda homey. Dino escorted me to a guest bedroom. I usually stayed in Dino's room – but I suppose two months is a bit different from a forty eight hour serious gaming session.<p>

"Well, Serena, when the Ninth told me that a girl was coming..." he trailed off. "So...so...uh...try to happy 'kay?"

_Is he saying I have different standards to a 'girl'? Then what the fuck am I?! _"Happy? I'm ecstatic." I opened the door. Blinked. Shut it. Opened it. Sadly, there was no change. _Dino was right. I'm not a girl.__  
><em>

Flowers? No thank you. Fashionable clothes? Impractical. Perfume? Asthma, lung cancer, etc. But worst of all...was the color.

Pink.

Pink wallpaper, pink carpet, pink bed sheets, pinkish lighting, pink...everything. I could feel my heart attempting to split into two.

"Do I - "

"One week. Consider it payback for keeping me in the dark."

* * *

><p>The first week trickled by slowly, quite literally, since I had to relearn quite a few basic movements. By that time, Dino still hadn't gotten over me arriving at the breakfast table wearing something equally ridiculous to the previous day. On the final day of torture, he happened choked on his cereal.<p>

"Well, Serena, nice morning, isn't it?" he asked, mopping up spilt milk.

As I thanked a maid who brought over some fruit, I shrugged. "I feel like a slut."

"Serena, it's a skirt."

"It barely covers my ass. What am I meant to do if there's a breeze?!"

Dino had a good laugh.

That evening, I'd finished reading a couple of textbooks, and decided to explore Dino's mansion a bit...deeper. There was really only one room I'd never seen inside, so I broke in like a ninja.

Jokes. The door wasn't locked.

A grand grand piano stared me in the face. No seriously, it was beautiful. I tapped a few keys to find it was horribly out of tune - so I spent the next few hours making sure each and every single one of those 88 keys were in perfect harmony. I couldn't remember any particularly nice songs (well, if 'Mary Had A Little Lamb' didn't count) so I fiddled around with a bunch of handwritten music. It wasn't all that bad.

Until a true ninja butler appeared beside me.

"WOW MAN, I'm sorry I was just - "

"I'm sorry to disturb you Miss, the Boss would like to see you. If you'd follow me..."

Dino's Dad looked sickly. I had a feeling he was on his death bed. "Um...Sir...thank you for your kind hospitality," I started, trying to avoid an awkward silence.

"It's Serena, isn't it?" he questioned, somewhat lacking any regard.

"Yes Sir," I affirmed.

"It's a suitable name..." he murmured, in his own world.

I wondered what business he had with me. Maybe he was going to kick me out? Nah...he was acting too nice for that. Maybe I'd offended him in some way? Unlikely. Maybe...he didn't approve of my relationship with Dino? ...Likely.

"I love the sound of that piano," he added to whatever he was previously saying. He wasn't the only one in his own little world. "My late wife wrote that song for our anniversary."

_Dino's Mom?! _"I apologize for destroying your wife's masterpiece..."

"It was better than her," he laughed, but ended up coughing. "I want to thank you, while I still have the chance."

"Thank...thank m-me?" I commented. "Huh?"

He smiled. "Dino will become a fine boss. Reborn was his tutor, but you pushed while he dragged." _That makes no sense bro. _"You gave my son the only thing I couldn't. Thank you."

"Uh...that's fastidious?" I muttered awkwardly. _What does he mean? You can literally buy everything these days._

He laughed softly. "I hope that one day, you will be the one by Dino's side..."

And then he died. Actually, I thought he went to sleep. I had no idea what he meant either. It was only hours later, when Reborn gave me a surprise visit, when I found out the truth.

* * *

><p>"So Reborn, why the visit?" I sniffed unemotionally. Come on, I caught a cold. "Have you told Dino yet?"<p>

Reborn nodded dismally. "He's actually been a mess ever since you got yourself in Vindice. I thought he'd improve when you returned...but no luck." _...Is he blaming me or something? _"Serena, I'm not here to pin blame on you." _Really? Not that sounds like a lie._ "I need a favor. Can you do it?"

I perked up at that. "Depends on the favor."

"I can't tell you the favor until you agree or disagree," Reborn put in apologetically. "Let me rephrase the question then. What would you be willing to go through for Dino?"

"Anything."

"Anything?"

"Well...if the Ninth didn't have beef with it, or it killed him, or - "

"Thank you. Here's what I want you to do..."

* * *

><p>I can't believe I said 'anything'.<p>

Taking a deep breath, I pushed off the wall and peeked through the keyhole of Dino's office. He was on the edge of his seat, face in his hannds, discussing something with Romario. Reborn's genius plan looked something like this:

Step 1: Enter Dino's room.

Step 2: Try to kill him and Romario.

Step 3: Let Dino overpower me, and on the verge of death, tell him that Reborn told me to do it.

Step 4 (assuming I survived step 3): Dino realizes that his family needs him and everyone's happy.

Weapons I could use: a pen. Yeah, I know; a waste of a perfectly good pen. It wasn't even a ballpoint - it was felt-tip damn it.

Gathering my faith in Reborn, I turned around and kicked open the door. Dino looked up. "Oh, Serena...the door wasn't locked. But...now's not the - "

"Pick up your whip," I said flatly.

"Uh...what?"

"Pick up your whip, Cavallone," I repeated louder, stressing every syllable, brandishing the pen in front of me.

He stood up slowly, somewhat confused. "What are you...?"

Before the guilt could settle in, I ran and stabbed Romario in the arm. As Romario cried out in pain, Dino was instantly there, pulling me back. "Serena! What's gotten into you? Is that...a pen?!" With my back to Dino, I mouthed a quick apology to Romario. He seemed to get it.

Breaking free from Dino, I slapped him in the face. _Oh-my-God-this-hurts-more-than-punching-why-did-I-even- _Reborn was right. His expression was really something new.

I picked up the pen from the floor, and dashed beside Romario, aiming it at his neck. "What will you do, Cavallone?" I sneered as nastily as I could. "Are you just an effeminate sissy figurehead? Your father was right. You are a mess!"

In an instant, I felt my arm being yanked away, and I saw Dino's whip curled around my wrist. "Please stop talking, Serena," he whispered. "And I know I'm a mess. You don't have to tell me to let me know."

"I'm an assassin. My target is your family. Can you kill me?! Can you protect them?!"

He froze.

The door opened, and a whole bunch of his subordinates came into the room. "Young Master!"

Dino and I made eye contact. "No!" he yelled, as I charged for his stack of subordinates.

And so we brawled. I kicked here and there, and he waved his whip around. After a while, I got tired, and I could only watch and tied me up. "I...I don't understand Serena..." he murmured, his voice breaking.

"You thought I was your friend, Cavallone? Fool!" I yelled, forcing a maniacal laugh. Every word stabbed my heart just a little deeper. "Your father paid me to be your friend. Squalo got sick of it fast. Now that the geezer's dead, this stupid charade is over!" _I swear to God Reborn, you're going pay me back for this. Or I'll fucking gut you!__  
><em>

Dino really did look unsure for a second, but Reborn chose that moment to make his entrance. "Are you going to kill her, Dino? She attacked your family, she's not even your friend, and she hates you."

But still he didn't move, like a frozen statue. But suddenly, he slackened his grip on me, and swung his whip around in some odd movements. "Salto volante veloce come luce!"

Staying absolutely still, the wall and room beside me tore apart, sending bits of brick and plaster all over the place. And when he stopped, I opened one eye. And I wasn't even hit. Everything else was pulverized.

I cried. I'm not going to lie, make myself sound awesome - I felt like a piece of shit. "Your Dad never said that. You're my best friend. I can't hate you." Dino stepped forward, perfect poker face in place. Shutting my eyes, I turned my head away. "I'm sorry."

He hugged me.

"Wha-What are you doing?" I choked, sniffling.

Dino broke away, and I saw his tear-streaked face. "Serena, thank you."

"B-But..."

"I will be the Cavallone Tenth Boss. Because my family needs me," he put simply, wiping his eyes on his sleeve. _Very unhygenic. And unmanly. But fuck that. _"And I know you don't hate me," he grinned. "You'd never call me 'Cavallone' with such a straight face."

* * *

><p>After that, things started happening quickly. While he prepared for his Inheritance Ceremony, I studied like crazy. My exams were only weeks away, and I'd fallen just a tad bit behind, with you know, dealing with amnesia, being convicted as a criminal of the worst kind and being a supportive friend.<p>

It nearly killed me, but on the eve of my exam, I burned all my textbooks, and everything that had anything to do with school. There was no going back.

I didn't feel a single scrap of anxiety as teachers handed out written exams. Still no anxiety when I realized I studied for the wrong subjects, or fell asleep in the middle of it all.

The first thing I did after the exam: a cartwheel. Because I'm cool like that.

* * *

><p><em>About a week later...<em>

There were a few traditions that the Cavallone family had. I'd thought the Varia Inheritance was weird, but the Cavallone's was just downright...cheerful.

Firstly, all the guests would arrive in a horse drawn carriage, and announced by the doorman. _Sure, why not._

When everyone finally arrived, both the External Advisor and the new boss would shoot flaming arrows through a hoop, and finally, the boss would have to dance with everyone at the party. Including the guys. _...Not judging, I swear. _

Then there were a whole list of complicated party games, dancing, eating, and party stuff to do till dawn. If you left before dawn, you'd be disowned by the entire Cavallone family. _That seems like a pointless waste of cash._

Dino was actually decent at archery. Except...he had the habit of poking himself in the eye when he was loading the arrow. And when the arrow was lit, he kept on shooting at me. It was hard to tell if it was on purpose.

I caught another flaming arrow that would've hit my stomach. Now, that was strange because _indoors_. Looking out the open windows, I saw Dino apologizing repeatedly from a distance. Extinguishing it quickly, I tried to take a nap. Seconds later, I was almost impaled by another flaming arrow. Walking to my window, I yelled, "DUDE! Aim for Reborn next time!"

"Miss..."

I glared at the messenger at my door.

"S-Serena..."

Grinning, I sat up and caught another flaming arrow. "Thank you. So, what's up?"

"Your principal wants to see you in his office..."

Out_standing. _But it certainly beat dodging flaming arrows.

* * *

><p>When I arrived at my principal's office, I strutted right in and sat down on the edge of his desk. Screw formalities. "Wassup biatch."<p>

Guess who else was there? Iemitsu. He was in a deep conversation with my principal, shaking his head a lot. Or at least he was, before I crashed the party. "Did I say you could come in?" my principal snapped. _Wow. Is it the wrong time of the month?_

"May I come in?" I asked, retaining my position.

"Get out and say that!" he ordered. Iemitsu shot me a look, and I sighed, exiting the room, and knocking a cheery tune.

"Come in!"

"May I have a seat?" I asked with the most politely exaggerated tone I had.

"NO! Stand in the corner!"

I shrugged and walked to where he pointed, waiting for him to talk. I reminded myself that this was the same principal that told me about my parents' death, the very same one that advised Squalo to ditch me, and the same fat, balding, middle aged man who forced a smile as he told me 'congratulations for coming thirteenth this year' for the past four years.

"Serena di Squalo, you must pay for the price of your crimes! You are to be expelled!"

Iemitsu summarised it in a nutshell. "He says you cheated."

I blinked. "Do I still get to graduate?"

"NO!"

Now I was angry. "Please, enlighten me. How did I cheat again?" I asked, keeping my tone calm. "I sat in the main hall with a hundred and forty nine other students, had a completely random test, and used standard stationery. You also 'happened' to run out of calculators when you reached me."

"Exactly! But your math test was the only perfect score!"

I sighed. "Have you ever considered the fact that you don't _need _a calculator to do math? It's called _pen_ and _paper_."

My principal looked on the verge of a lecture, but Iemitsu cut in. "With all due respect sir, is this the only thing you called us here today for?"

"NO!"

_Huh. He really like saying 'no', doesn't he?_

"Physics! Chemistry! Medicine! Every test was over ninety five percent!" he roared, slamming my papers on the desk one after the other. "It is impossible for a student, who has missed school for the past six to eight months of school, to achieve these results!"

"So...you're saying she cheated, even though you have _no_ evidence," Iemitsu surmised, clearly uninterested. I'd forgotten that he was my legal guardian. At least he was on my side, right? "That doesn't seem very logical."

"This is not a matter of logic!"

"What if I redid the test, in your office, right here, right now?" I offered. "Is that legit enough for you? I'll show you - "

"You had your chance. You're expelled. Serena di Squalo, you will never graduate!"

I started walking forward, but Iemitsu calmly stood up and put an arm in front of me "Sir, I have something to say to you. This, is Serena di Squalo. She's a terrible subordinate, but she's an honest student. I honestly don't care what happens to her - "

*Starts swearing loudly, repeatedly*

" – but the Ninth has ordered me to raise her. So I will give you one chance to retract her expulsion. Might I remind you, that I am the External Advisor of the Vongola family; the family which currently funds your school, signs your pay checks, and allows you to breathe."

"E-Even though that is true, I cannot allow this to pass!"

I calmed myself. Of course I was going to graduate. Ten years of school. Not as long as some others, but I wanted to make it count. "You know, I think I understand what's going on here. Judging by your reaction, and my grades, I can safely assume that I passed and ranked quite high, correct?"

His eyes flared. "Don't think you're _special_. You're nothing!"

"And judging from my sudden and completely meaningless expulsion," I continued, ignoring him, "I believe that you cannot fulfill numerous bribes by rich parents, because my grades are too high to be degraded. Am I wrong?"

"N-No!" he retorted weakly. But I'd already seen through him.

"In which case, you actually have no reason to expel me, but are in fact making excuses to regain your personal dignity and image," I glared.

"W–well..."

I slammed my hands in front of his desk loudly and dramatically, making my fingers go numb. "Let me explain to you _one _thing. I have not seen Squalo, my only brother, and the Varia, my first foster family legally for not a month, not a year, but _five years_. I do not care if I come first, or dead last in the grade. But. BUT. I must graduate." Turning on my heel, I marched out of the room, and slammed the door shut.

It fell off its hinges.

Harrumphing, I left the building and waited for Iemitsu at the gates of my school. He came about a minute later. "I've never seen you look so emotional. Touching speech."

"The truth hurts."

He whacked the back of my head. "But that was some shameful manners, Serena. Don't I scold you enough?"

"Cut to the chase. Am I expelled?" I asked, balling my fists.

Iemitsu looked at the clear sky for a moment. "No. Looks like you're going to graduate. It seems he's had a sudden change of heart."

"Really?" I asked sceptically.

Iemitsu considered.

*Flashback*

_Iemitsu shoved the tip of his handgun into the other man's mouth. "If Serena di Squalo does not pass with the rank and grade she received, I swear to God I'll come back to cap your brains. Personally. Got it, asshole?"_

_The principal nodded quickly._

"_Wonderful!" Iemitsu smiled, wiping his gun dry on the principal's jacket. "Thank you for wasting my time."_

*End flashback*

"Of course," Iemitsu yawned. "But you're paying for the door."

But I was no longer listening. I was chanting swears of joy, over and over.

* * *

><p><strong>The Cavallone Tenth<strong>

Only a few hours before the first guests would arrive, Dino called me to his office. I'd just gotten up, and I was in my pyjamas. This was really becoming too much of a habit. "I'm sorry I slept in Dino," I apologized as soon as I walked in, seeing everyone in formal clothing.

"Serena, there's something that I have to ask..." Dino said slowly. "And I want you to think about this first. Just listen to what I have to say."

I nodded.

"It has been tradition for each new boss to have a different External Advisor. The External Advisor must be someone who the boss trusts with his life, and someone who would risk their life to protect the boss, and the Cavallone family. This person...must not be biased and...and wise and true. I...I..." he hesitated, looking at me in the eye.

"Go on and say it Dino," I urged. Really, I was dreading in where this was all leading.

"I want you to be the External Advisor for the tenth generation Cavallone family."

Blink. "Uh huh. I see. WAIT WHAT?"

I'd gone through so much trauma in pyjamas.

* * *

><p><em>That night...<em>

I poured myself another punch. Pretending it was alcohol, I mulled over my thoughts. Tomorrow was my birthday. And my graduation. I could finally see Squalo - legitimately. But what if he forgot? What if he didn't come? _  
><em>

Anyways, tonight, I was officially the External Advisor for the Cavallone family. Now wasn't that just dandy... From the way Dino put it; I pretty much showed up at really important parties, meetings, and in the case of war, supported the Cavallone. And since everything was peaceful at the moment, I didn't have to worry about a thing.

Just another fancy title to throw around.

Casting a glance at Dino (he was dancing with yet another girl) I decided it was alright to get some fresh air. Walking onto the balcony, I ignored the countless couples sharing their romantic moments. The night air was humid, and city lights glistened in the distance. The door to the balcony swung open again, and the laughter of an entire cohort of girls echoes around. I did my best not to twitch.

"Did you see him? He was totally a clutz!" one girl giggled.

"Yeah. If it wasn't for his money, power or influence, I'd totally ditch him," another agreed.

"I mean, like, he's nice and all, but nice guys finish last these days," a third piped up. "Let's make a bet. Each of us will try to make him fall in love with us, and then we'll break his heart. Who's in?"

The entire cohort cheered.

"No, let's vote on the first kiss first!" someone squealed.

"First in bed!"

"First to get a present!"

*SHATTER*. Oh look. My punch. What a waste. For a fact, I knew Dino could hear every single word they were saying. So fuck them all. It was the job of the External Advisor to clean up trash, right? "Oi. I'm afraid I'll have to ask you things - I mean, people, to leave," I called out loud enough to get their attention.

"Shut up little kid. Go and play hide and seek or something..." one of them said, uninterested.

"Um...how about this: you hide, get lost, and die in a hole alone?" I asked innocently with a smile.

"OMG, that is so rude!"

"Of course, and it isn't at all rude to talk about your host this evening as an object that you can possess," I speculated. "I totally see your side of the argument."

"Who the hell are you anyway?" they asked with and upturned nose.

"Just some random person passing by." For the first time in...forever, I extended my walking stick, earning a chorus of laughter. Actually, they were still laughing, as I knocked them out in four seconds flat. I didn't even glance at them as I made my way back inside. Almost immediately, I bumped into Dino. His face brightened up a great deal when he saw me.

"Ah Serena! I was just looking for you!" he grinned cheesily. "Is...is that _blood_?!"

"Wine," I muttered, keeping my eyes away from the balcony. "You were looking for me...?"

"I haven't had a dance with you yet right?"

"Um...no. I'll pass. Really. I was born with two left feet. I'll just - "

Dino grabbed my hands and lead me into the centre of the crowd. "Well well well, heels?" he teased.

I blushed. Dress _and _heels. Nightmare, I tell you. "Reborn forced me."

Dino smiled and leaned forward to whisper. "Are you sure you didn't just want to act like a girl for one night?"

I head-banged him. "I'm so sure, that I'll never wear heels and a dress ever again," I answered curtly.

"Ow...your head is so thick..." he grimaced, shaking his head, making his hair whip around. "I'll hold you to that, Serena. You know, I always hoped that you'd finally get your girly hormones when you reached thirteen. You're a teenager, Serena!"

I head-banged him again.

The song ended, he led me to the food section. Making sure no one was watching, he grabbed the cherry off a cake and popped it into his mouth. "So...about your birthday...I didn't really know what to get you," he admitted.

"Don't worry about it," I assured more to myself than to him. "I've got everything I need."

"Nonsense! Well...in the end, I got you this." Dino reached into his pocket and gave me a set of keys. "It's a motorbike," he explained. "And since your two months at the Cavallone estate are practically up..." he trailed off, fiddling in his multiple pockets. "Aha! I got you Cavallone keycard. Whenever you're in trouble with one of our allied families, just show it to them, and they'll leave you alone," he beamed, placing it into my palm. "You can get around anywhere in the mansion. And you'll get a discount to every store that accepts EFTPOS."

I stared at my gifts. "I don't know quite what to say..." I murmured.

"You could say 'oh, that's so cool!'" he said dramatically. "Nah I'm kidding."

"Oh! That's _so _cool!" I tried to imitate, but it came out just a little sarcastic. Oh screw it. "Thanks Dino. I owe you one."

"Damn right you do. You owe me _big time_. Now I get one Serena coupon," he laughed slightly evilly.

"No you don't. I'm your External Advisor now."

"That's meant to be an honor..." he tried to explain. My face obviously didn't look honored. "So...ready for you graduation?"

I stared at my feet. "You could say that."

"I bet you're dux," he declared, casually throwing an arm around my shoulders.

"Don't say that!" I panicked, recalling my talk with my principal. Maybe I should've pretended to be nice and say more compliments. "I'll be happy with last."

"Last? Tut tut, you were who told me to aim higher than first," he joked. "Come on, just go enjoy the rest of the party. You'd better get to sleep soon though," he added as an afterthought.

"Early? I promised you that I'd celebrate till sunrise on your inheritance!" I reminded, grabbing glasses of wine for the both of us.

"Come on Serena, you're under age," he pointed out as I shoved the glass into his hands.

"To Dino Cavallone, the tenth generation boss!" I spoke as humbly as I could, clinked our glasses, and chugged it down before he could say anything else. "Ah! Brilliant. Let's go get some more."

And so we spent the remainder of that night, and the morning of the next day drinking, dancing, talking, and playing part games. The highlight was when Reborn entered and complimented Dino for the first time...like ever.

It was fun.

* * *

><p>Until sunrise.<p>

Dino's subordinates were all drunk with hangovers, so Dino drove me to school himself. We weren't feeling so great ourselves - pulling an all nighter is never easy on its own, anyways. So try to understand, why that morning was on my 'close death encounters' list.

In a flash, we were at my school, receiving pamphlets and directions. The formality was killing me. When I finally was able to sit down and see how I'd done...I couldn't wipe the terror off my face.

"Serena, what's wrong?!" Dino asked, suddenly on alert. I shoved the pamphlet in his face.

"I'm...I'm dux..."

"I knew you had it in you!" Dino complimented, ruffling my hair. "Now every family will know your name!"

"But...I don't want people to know me..."

As the assembly started, the principal gave some boring speech about how another 'glorious and eventful year' had passed. The clock seemed to be ticking in slow motion. "And finally, our dux this year..." He paused for almost a minute. "Serena di Squalo, will give the final speech."

I looked at Dino beside me. Speech? Now that I thought about it, I'd always skipped the last of day of school, and thus presentation day. Was I meant to prepare a speech or something? Oh whoops. Dino slunk some palm cards into my pocket and winked. Oh that's right...he was dux last year. The exam had basically been designed in his favor but...oh well.

There was polite applause as I walked onto stage. Pulling out the palm cards, my expression dropped. 'My graduation speech' it read. 'My name is Dino Cavallone! My high school experiences were the best in my life because of all the wonderful teachers and everyone here, in this hall!'. I facepalmed.

Most. Retarded. Speech. Ever.

But I had nothing, so I tried to go impromptu. While scanning the audience quickly, I started. "Uh...hi. My name is Serena di Squalo, and I'm thirteen today. I um...would like to say..." I trailed off. I didn't see Squalo. Choking down my disappointment, I tried not to look like an absolute fool. "I would like to say...that...that..."

The back doors opened quietly, so only the people on the stage noticed. And the people who entered were the people I wanted to see most.

The Varia.

Squalo was there, sticking a quick thumbs up. Lussuria was holding a video camera. Bel seemed to be doing his classic '~ushi shi shi shi~', leaning on the far wall. Mammon and Levi were obviously bored, but I suppose the fact that they came was all that mattered.

Subconsciously, I smiled. "As I was saying, Mafia High is designed to be a bitch; and if you make it through, congrats. If you don't...well you'll just end up six feet under sooner than you hoped. The teachers..." I looked at the first few rows of them, trying to find the appropriate words. "...vary. But most of all, I'd like to say, you can all go fuck yourselves," I finished.

Those last few words really surprised the crowd. Was I not meant to say that? Oh well, too late to take it back. Without hesitating, the Varia started clapping loudly. Dino gave me a 'sure, why not expression', and started clapping too. People followed suit, and the graduating year threw off their graduation hats, cheering.

I shook the Ninth's frozen and outstretched hand, grabbed the piece of paper that was proof of my graduation, jumped off the stage, walked down the aisle and threw off my graduation cap. When I finally reached the end of the aisle, Squalo grinned and gave me a crashing hug.

"VOI! How can you call that a graduation speech?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...dumbass," Bel giggled after him. He punched me in the shoulder (extremely hard punch, it was), but I suppose if you consider the fact the Varia is a bunch of assassins, a punch is the equivalent of 'wassup'.

"Aww, you're so cute!" Lussuria squealed, squeezing my face.

"Come on, that hurts..." I complained, rubbing my cheeks. "What's up with you guys?"

"Nothing. What's up with you?"

I thought for a few seconds. "Nothing," I replied, unable to wipe the smirk off my face.

Best birthday EVER.

* * *

><p><strong>Tis not the end. I'll give you a clue about the next chapter. It starts with a 'J', and ends with 'apan'.<strong>

**If there're any comments, suggestions, complaints, and thoughts, just review or PM me, and I'll do my best to make to happen.**

**Have a nice day, ciao ~ :]**


	18. Arrival to Japan

Chapter 18 - Arrival to Japan

You know, for some strange reason, I had this image of slow triumphant music playing in the distance, as I reunited with the Varia.

I was wrong.

_One_ car ride, and I started to wonder why I even missed them in the first place. The Varia just had that effect on you. Lunch was cheerful, of course. They booked out an entire restaurant, so they could have a food fight. When we got back to the Varia HQ, we watched a couple of movies, played some poker...and well, bragged about things we did.

Despite being somewhat enlightened (and possibly very sleep deprived), that night I had trouble falling asleep. My heart was racing. From happiness? Or was it anxiety? Who knows. Whichever way, I found myself lounging on the Varia rooftop, watching the stars move across the sky.

"Can't sleep?"

I turned to see Squalo, dressed too, in pyjamas. "Can't sleep," I confirmed dejectedly. "What brings you to my humble abode?"

He shrugged. "I'm still missing out on like what; five years of your life?"

"And you didn't find time to ask, in the past fifteen hours, ten minutes, and give or take twenty seconds?" I mused, laughing.

"VOI! It's not like I didn't want to. I figured with those jokers around, it'd just take a lot longer, and give everyone a lot more trauma," Squalo put nicely, but his aura didn't ooze that much 'niceness'.

"Point taken. What do you want to know?" I asked, letting my focus slide back to the stars.

It took him a moment to answer. "I'm sorry..." he smirked. "But you looked so peaceful for a moment. I think I finally realized why Mom and Dad called you 'Serena'."

I pretended to look offended. "Gee thanks, Squalo. Only took you 'bout...thirteen years. That makes you a fricking genius."

He smiled apologetically. "Mentioning Mom and Dad...it was you in the other office, wasn't it?" he remembered. "When the dude read out the will."

"Yeah. I figured it was you on the other side too. The fucking Ninth...I wanted to kill him so badly. The closes I got was underneath his verandah. Dino talked me out of it."

I did consider killing him a few times. Never got as far as the Vongola mansion's front entrance," he admitted. "Lussuria talked me out of it."

Realizing the reflection in our actions we burst out laughing. "So," I muttered, after we calmed down. "Did you ever go to Asia?"

Squalo took a second to remember our previous conversation. "Yeah. I did. Defeated a hundred masters of a hundred techniques."

"In succession?"

He nodded with a grin. "In succession."

I let out a low whistle. "So, do you feel stronger?"

"I haven't found the perfect opponent yet."

"The day will come," I thought. "But that day, is not today. How's the Varia been without me?"

"More sadistic. Darker," Squalo concluded.

"Darker? How?"

He shrugged. "Mammon kept on switching lights off to save the electricity bill or something..." Squalo looked off into the forest surrounding the mansion, and shook his head. "How was life with CEDEF?" Squalo murmured. "Never liked Iemitsu much."

"That makes the two of us. But he's nice like...once in a blue moon," I replied honestly. I suppose Iemitsu wasn't such a bad guy. He was pretty much the sole reason I could be with Squalo...but then again, I had a lifetime of service to him.

Squalo nodded, taking in my honest words. "And how was...Vindice?"

One word summed it all up. "Weird."

"I knew I should've gone instead of you," Squalo growled, finally sitting down beside me. "It's my responsibility to look after you."

"But it's _my_ responsibility to pay the price for _my _actions," I pointed out logically. "And chill. I mean...everything worked out in the end, right?"

"Yeah, I suppose," he reckoned, staring off. "Five years, and we haven't changed much, have we?"

"Hm. That's arguable though, Squalo. Suck long silky hair you have..."

"Tch. Who knew you'd end up with my haircut."

"Blame Bel."

"I do. You swear too much."

"You swear too damn little."

"You're a midget."

"You look old."

"You look like a guy."

I looked at Squalo's calm face, and a smirk crept to my face.

"I missed you, Squalo."

"I missed you too, Serena."

Leaning slightly on Squalo, I yawned. Finally. I was tired.

* * *

><p><em>On the other side of the roof...<em>

"I can't believe the stupid Captain called us 'jokers'," Levi grunted, uptight. "What did we ever do to him?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...piss him off, mock him, attack him on a daily basis, degrade him, and attempt kill him?" Bel listed obviously, ticking off his fingers.

"Well...shut up Bel."

"You shut up, you perverted old man."

Before they started bickering and resorting to violence, Mammon gave a heavy sighed. "They can both see through my illusions. I don't understand why I have to be here."

But no one was listening to him. Lussuria squealed like a fan girl. "Their relationship is _sooo cute_!"

"You're a full grown man," Bel snapped. "Grow up already, you pervert."

"You're a pervert too, Bel," Lussuria huffed back. "I know you made Serena strip."

Bel smiled innocently, showing off his teeth. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...I'm a prince. And she did it on her own."

"Hn. In your dreams, Bel. You're the mentally retarded one," Mammon murmured.

"Oh shut up Mammon," Bel frowned, squeezing Mammon's cheeks and pulling. "Squalo just isn't the same when she's around."

"Neither are you..." Mammon nagged, disappearing mysteriously from Bel's fingers.

* * *

><p><em>Half a year later...<em>

There's_ nothing_ quite like re-watching the entire horror movie series for the fourth time. I suppose if you compare it to Bel, the whole idea doesn't freak you out...as much.

"You know, Bel, you remind me of that hybrid alien-human thing," I cogitated thoughtfully, starting the final DVD. "I'm gonna go buy some food."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...go ahead, my slave."

I flipped him off as I left.

The weather in Brazil was nice. Scratch that. The weather's always nice in Rio.

Generally, my missions were in Europe or Asia. South Ameria was like a whole new world. Though as I left the hotel, I couldn't help but smile. How long had it been since I'd had a mission without feeling at least a little lonely? It was a pretty stupid idea to leave my weapons behind, but it was only a short trip. _Suck it up, you spoilt brat_, my brain chided.

The street was decently lit, and I could see the giant statue of Jesus looking down upon the city, almost as if to say 'I can see you. But you can't see me. MU HA HA HA – '

All right. I doubt he'd say that.

And all of a sudden, the street was thrown into pitch black and dead silence, doing no favors towards my growing unease. _Power outage? Yeah, maybe._ And the silence? _Maybe everyone was tired and went to sleep._

* * *

><p>Bel lounged on the bed, waiting patiently for a change. <em>~Ushi shi shi shi~...dumbass can sleep on the floor. It's only fair a prince sleeps on the bed...<em>

_VOI! VOI! VOI!_

Groaning, Bel sat up at looked at Serena's mobile phone. The phone stopped ringing, and Bel threw it aside. Squalo probably wanted to tell the dumbass 'sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite' or whatever shit they said to each other.

And then seconds later –

_VOI! VOI! VOI!_

The ringtone was seriously too irritating. One of kind, really. He flipped open the cell.

"VOI! What the fuck are you doing?"

Bel sniggered. So this was how siblings communicated. "Captain. How's Italy?"

"Bel?! What the hell are you doing on Serena's cell?" Squalo roared back.

"She's busy," Bel remarked, quickly losing interest.

"Tch. There are a bunch of hitmen out to get you two. Pasticcino family. They're not the easiest bunch to deal with. And you two better not be sharing a bed."

Bel rolled his eyes and hung up. Professionals huh? Sounded like fun. Hang on. Swinging his legs off the bed, he looked through the cracks of the venetian blinds. The street was too dark. And too quiet.

To add to things, Serena was awfully slow.

Muttering darkly, Bel put on his coat. Stupid dumbass. Couldn't even walk down a street without running into a group of assassins.

* * *

><p>Dang...was it left, or was it right? I stood at the dark crossroads, trying to make a logical decision. My memory was as crap as ever, and it was too dark to make out most of the features. Deciding to go left since I could see a street light in the distance, I trudged up the hill. And just as I was underneath it, it shattered and went out, leaving me in completely blind.<p>

I heard footsteps. Four people. Male. Different builds. Expensive footwear. Armed.

Hitmen.

"Hey, it wouldn't be fair to gang up against an unarmed girl, would it?" I spoke loud enough in Italian. "What family do I owe this wonderful pleasure to?"

"The Pasticcino family sends it regards." There was a slight swish, and I moved vaguely aside just in time to make out my reflection in the cold steel of the knife. I struck the man's elbow, and he dropped the knife.

"So remind me, are you hired, or part of the family?" I asked cheerfully, picking up the fallen blade. Nothing was going to ruin my day – morning...no wait; night...argh, same thing. "Not that it matters; but it'd be nice to know."

"You think you have the upper hand?" someone snickered. I threw the knife at him. His yell confirmed I didn't miss all that badly.

"I'm just hoping," I admitted, shrugging casually.

Something came for me on the right. I dodged, but arm still stung. Ah, I see. A sword. I was about to draw my own when I remembered that it was still impaled in the recently deceased chief of police. "I've been active since before you were _born_," a voice laughed, and I barely dodged a bullet. Literally...well, I mean, not in the literacy sense. You get me, right? On second thoughts, I don't even get myself.

"Well, that's nice," I murmured, dodging another swing of a sword, "but I'm too young to die!" I clapped my hands on the flat sides of the sword, and aimed a kick for the man's abdomen. Just as I was about to make contact, someone came up from behind me and slung something around my neck. My grip on the sword slipped, and my thigh was slashed.

There was a second gunshot, and I swerved the person choking me as a human shield. Alright. There was the sword guy, choking guy, gun guy, and the knife guy. Huh. Knife guy. Just like Bel...

Thinking about Bel, I laughed. Inappropriate timing, as always. That's right. I had a movie marathon to finish. My eyes had adjusted to the darkness. As all four advanced, I dropped to the floor and tripped knife guy. He stabbed sword guy, and they accidentally ended up cutting each other. One of their hands fell onto the floor, severed from its owner.

"I hope you don't play the piano," I chorused to no one in particular, jumping up and kicking the choking guy. With a wounded leg, I went down with him, and next thing I knew - a handgun was pointed in my face. How pleasant.

"Hn." The man observed his fallen team. "One against one. Except I'm behind the gun," he sneered. "Say your prayers."

Something caught my eye. "I'm not religious...why don't you say yours first?" I smiled, watching Bel jump off the roof and throw his knives viciously. The shot went wild, and missed me altogether.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you're late, dumbass," Bel taunted, staring at my failed attempts to stand up.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. What brings the 'almighty' prince here?" I grumbled as he slung my arm over his shoulder.

"The long-haired Captain called," he shrugged in response, purposely stepping on one of their faces, breaking whoever it was' nose.

"Great explanation," I commented.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...the wounded should shut up," he surmised, looking in a different direction.

I muttered something about how annoying princes should shut up too, and stared at the dark street. Oh no. I was starting to hallucinate. My arch nemesis...of imagination. Flinching, I gripped tighter onto Bel's shoulder. "Though, thank you."

"Tch. That's all you ever say," Bel jeered, meeting my eyes.

"Really? Then thanks for Hong Kong too. Six months late; but better late than never right?" I reasoned, burying my face in his sleeve. Suddenly, I regretted watching every single horror movie in my life. "Pretty sky tonight."

"You always talk about stupid things, dumbass. You're not even looking at the sky."

"Do I have to, to give a compliment?"

* * *

><p><em>The following morning...<em>

There's_ nothing_ quite like waking up to the light of a glorious morning, with rays of sunlight streaming through a crack in the curtains. And then, getting out from my bed, I stretched, yawned and started thinking about what I'd do on such a perfect morning.

Jokes.

Of course my morning wasn't like that. In fact, I woke up at two in the afternoon.

On a funky smelling bed with an equally funky smelling blanket.

Stark naked.

And finally, just to make matters worse, a prince drooling on me.

So, of course I did the natural thing.

"BEL. FUCKING GET OFF ME!" I raged, whacking him repeatedly with my pillow. "GAH! CLOTHES? WHERE?"

Groggy, Bel lifted his face. "The wounded should shut up," he repeated, punching my thigh.

"FUCK. ASSHOLE! THAT HURTS! PERVERTED PRINCE!"

"Tch. Do I get no credit for saving your life?" he stated, taking off his coat and throwing it on top of me. "There. Shut up; sleep."

I regained some of my composure looked at the clock on the wall. "Pervert, we missed our flight."

"Don't care dumbass."

"But pervert, that means we're stuck in Rio."

"I'm tired. Shut up." Bel inwardly groaned, with his face in his pillow. Honestly, a) he saved her life on a dark street, b) went through the pain and suffering of stitching her up while she kicked him repeatedly, and c) did the honors of throwing away her blood ridden clothes. Three favors, and he just ended up as a pervert.

Though he couldn't deny it. It really was a wonderful nap.

* * *

><p><strong>Fucked-Up Fourteen<strong>

Obviously, when tragedies occur: they find the need to be on my birthday.

And no, I don't mean a play.

You see, the Ninth had three sons (I tried not to envision their mother). Enrico, Massimo and Federico – well...if you counted Xanxus (who was technically adopted), then four sons. And you see, the tragedy, was that all three of his _remaining_ sons died.

Enrico, the most qualified, was accidentally shot in a feud as I was dragged out of the comfort of my bed.

Massimo, the second choice, was drowned as the Varia surprised me in the living room with gifts.

And last but not least, the favorite child, Federico, was reduced to bones as I blew out my birthday candles.

By the time we were eating cake, the Ninth's men turned up and ushered me to leave with them, without giving answering any of my endless questions. "Squalo!" I yelled as the led me to the car. "If I don't come back by tomorrow, don't just assume I'm alive!"

"VOI! Don't fucking die then!" he called back, as he throttled one of the Ninth's men. Unfortunately, we couldn't kill them without being busted by the Vongola family. Such a shame.

The Ninth's subordinates shoved me into the back seat, not nearly as nicely as how the police did it. My nose banged into the edge of the door, and they locked the doors as soon as the door was shut.

I had a feeling I wouldn't be seeing the Varia for a while.

* * *

><p>By the time we reached our destination, my clothes were bloody from one hell of a nosebleed, and the Ninth's men were on the verge of their sanity. I suppose it was a bit cruel to sing happy birthday to myself, extremely off tune at the top of my lungs while for the entire four hour trip. It's a miracle we didn't crash.<p>

The Ninth's guardians could only stare unenthusiastically as I bounded up the stairs to a private jet. _Shit, are we going somewhere? _Taking a cautious peek inside, I almost turned around and ran - but alas, the Ninth's guardians forced me into the compact compartment, though they themselves only stayed by the door. There were only a handful of seats; everything was...plush. Carpet, furniture, walls, curtains. Ah. Of course. And my two favorite gentleman were present too._  
><em>

"Well well well, if it isn't the fucking old obnoxious man," I announced irritably, glaring at the Ninth. "Make this quick, I have better shit to do."

"Serena, manners!" Iemitsu hissed from the other end of the plane.

"Manners work both ways," I hissed back at him, walking to where Iemitsu was standing. "Why the hell is he like that?" The Ninth seemed devastated. He was staring off blankly, and barely acknowledging my arrival.

"_He, _has a title," Iemitsu lectured, pushing my head down. He reached into his pocket, and pulled out a piece of paper. "Read it to yourself."

Sighing, I took the piece of paper.

**0700: Ninth's oldest son was caught in the accidental crossfire of a family feud between the Carcassa family**  
><strong>0800: Ninth's second son was found drowned in an aquarium<strong>  
><strong>0830: bones of the Ninth's third son were sent via mail<strong>

Oh. I see now. They were purposely wasting my time. "Ninth, you have my condolences. May they rest in peace, and may you find the culprits." I turned to leave, heading for the door.

"That is not the reason I ordered you here," the Ninth declared, finally speaking. "And the culprit has already been found."

I raised an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? Who?"

"You."

Waaaaaaaaait...did he just... "HA! Nice one, Ninth. Who knew you could crack jokes like that?"

"Multiple eye witnesses, as well as positive fingerprint and blood tests," Iemitsu cut in, seriously, much like the killjoy he was.

"I can't believe this!" I shouted. "You actually think I did it? Seriosuly? I have a perfect alibi, and there's _no reason _that I would kill your sons. Not to mention - I don't leave fingerprints. I'm your dog, remember? I mean – go suspect Iemitsu if you must suspect anyone. Only his son can inherit the family now."

"I know Iemitsu didn't do it."

I glared at the Ninth. "So you just _somehow _know I did it."

"The Varia is renowned for doing the impossible," the Ninth answered. "But I know that you are not lying." He stood up from his chair, and I could sense his sorrow. "I am an old man, Serena."

"No shit, dude. You're ancient," I grumbled, earning a whack from Iemitsu.

Ignoring my comment, the Ninth continued. "Anyhow, you are correct. Iemitsu's son is the only one who can be the Vongola Tenth now. Which means he is the last hope for the Vongola."

I folded my arms. "I don't get it. This and me...what's the connection?"

Iemitsu answered. "My son currently resides in - "

"- Namimori, Japan. With your adorable wife. How many times do you think I've heard that?" I interrupted, earning another whack. Wow. Was I really that annoying?

"Reborn will be sent to Japan in two week's time, to tutor my son, and help him become ready to be the Vongola - "

"I still don't see where I come in on this."

"Stop interrupting, Serena," Iemitsu instructed, pulling out a gun and pointing it at the side of my head. Perhaps it was best not to mention it was illegal to carry firearms on a plane. "Japan is a country that neither CEDEF or the Vongola have much territory of."

"So...you want me to protect him?" I spluttered. No way. That was so cliché.

"No," Iemitsu replied, making note of my expression. "I want you to go to Japan, and watch him. Send me weekly reports on his school grades, habits, personality, friends, etcetera. But do not make contact. I've arranged for Reborn to be his tutor; before that happens, I want to know everything about my son."

Now I was really pissed. "So, you want me to go to Japan for a whole month to stalk your son, and find out about his life, which you, his father should already know about?"

"Pretty much," Iemitsu shrugged obliviously. "But there is also a lot of 'cleaning' work that I need you to do in Japan. I want you to mark Japan as Vongola territory."

"...Japan. That's an entire fucking country."

"So I hear."

"And this is just...me."

"You have two years."

"T-Two years?" I stuttered. "No! Are you insane? I just got back together with the Varia, and now you want me to leave the continent?"

The Ninth, interlocked his fingers, and put his elbows on his desk. "There's another issue I need to address with you."

"Issue?"

"You are a bad influence on the Varia. It has only been recent times since I've considered how big a mistake it was to allow you to join."

I charged at the Ninth, and Iemitsu caught me under my arms. Tch. He always ended up being the one restraining me. "YOU DIDN'T 'ALLOW ME' YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! YOU FORCED ME!"

The Ninth looked out the tiny window, as if dirty asphalt was more pleasing to the eye than I. "Perhaps. I have realized that my decisions in the past years have caused you much pain - "

"YOU THINK?"

"- but I cannot deny - "

"I'LL FUCKING DECAPITATE YOU, RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW! BRING IT ON, MOTHERFUCKER."

"- your unparalleled talent as an assassin."

"WHAT'S THAT GOT TO DO WITH ANYTHING?"

The Ninth sighed. "The mafia was not a suitable path for you. Your soul is too gentle. It's a shame you made the wrong decisions." He stood up, straightening his perfectly ironed suit. "You will leave for Japan immediately. All arrangements have been made. Limit contact with the Varia. This is an order." Iemitsu released me, and the two left me alone on the plane.

_I'll kill him. No - one day, I swear, they'll both die by my hand!_

* * *

><p>Mental pain hurts, damn it. Every second took me approximately 900 feet away from anything I tried to call 'home'. That 13 hour flight was worse than shattering all the bones in one hand; and believe me, I know.<p>

It was some early hour in the morning when my plane landed in Namimori, Japan. The airport wasn't even operational at that hour; the unsociable pilot handed me a file as he ushered me into the dark, lifeless abyss, taking off as quickly as he'd landed._  
><em>

*Tumble weed moment*...

After a few minutes, my vision adjusted to the faint light of the moon, allowing me to examine the contents of the rather thin file. The majority of documents entailed information on my alias, official documents, etc. The remainder (aka. one sheet of paper) was a map of Namimori with three locations marked; school, target, living space.

Relying only on a somewhat brief map and my exhausted sense of direction, I found my 'living space' as the sun rose. The location itself wasn't bad - a short jog away from the shopping district, and no living soul in their rightful mind would walk within a thousand feet radius. After all - the district consisted of a maze of abandoned warehouses. The place I was supposed to stay looked just as decayed and desolate as any other building.

_I'm really supposed to live here...? _Doubtfully, I entered. And promptly gasped.

The seven-floored building was constructed with a spiralling staircase as its core. Each floor had its own purpose; living room, dining room/kitchen, bathroom (the bath was the size of a pool), bedroom, study, laundry, and a training room (weapons provided).

Home sweet home?

Seeing as I had nothing better to do, I decided to at least meet Iemitsu's son. Well, see him, I suppose.

Dressed in a provided school uniform (pants and a tie - WOOT NO SKIRT) and an additional baseball cap, I took a short-cut (I don't see why people don't use roofs as a means to travel) and waited, pen in one hand, pad in the other. A few hours later:

**0507 hours: Target is snoring very loudly.**

**0615 hours: Nana checks the mail.**

**0715 hours: Dog barks.**

**0730 hours: A bunch of school students walk past.**

"EXTREME!"

I snapped around, trying to look for the source. Ah. I see. Sasagawa Ryohei. He was supposed to be the future sun guardian, right? "JOIN THE BOXING CLUB!" he yelled six times louder than a normal person. My poor, poor eardrums...

Focusing back on my task, I was just in time to see Iemitsu's son slam open the door. "I'm leaving!" he called over his shoulder.

**0750 hours: Target leaves the house.**

Following him as he ran to Namimori Middle, I wrote down things on the way.

**0752 hours: Target almost gets hit by delivery truck; did not look left and right.**

**0756 hours: Target runs away from a bee, screaming.**

**0804 hours: Target is late for school, narrowly avoids a beating from a bunch of guys with regent hairstyles.**

As I scribbled down the last word, a shadow appeared in front of me. "Late comers will be bitten to death."

Peeking from underneath my hat, I recognized Hibari Kyoya. Future cloud guardian. _I was kinda going to leave...but he might bust me for trying to jig. Oh well, what's the harm in going to school? _"I'm sorry, won't happen again," I apologized quickly, running around him.

* * *

><p>My classroom was labelled 2-B. I was only late by a bit. All right; twenty minutes. So I got lost. And started walking aimlessly in circles.<p>

"Hey – are you the new student?" a voice came from behind me. Oh? It was the teacher. So I wasn't the only one late, huh?

Nodding, I studied him in my peripheral vision, keeping my head down.

"Well..." he took a moment to take in my appearance. "I'll settle the class down first. I'll get you in a minute or so."

Nod. I hadn't exactly planned to show up to school so...I had about a minute to cram in the information on my alias.

**Name: Serena Knight **(_Oh, what a coincidence.__)_

**Age: 14, middle school 2nd year, DOB/ 13th June **_(Would it have killed you to get me a present, if you knew it was my birthday? And how am I supposed to stalk your kid, when I'm in a different grade?)_

**Background: ****Eurasian (Japanese father, English mother) **_(English? I know jack shit about England.)_

**Life Story: Orphan (both parents died in a mining accident at a young age), recently emancipated. Financially stable, lives alone, moved to Japan to finish secondary education (thought Japan was 'kawaii'). Intelligent, mildly athletic, suffers from eating, sleeping, mental disorders.** _(What type of an alias is this? This is just...me.)_

**Personality: Reserved. Hot-tempered. Despicable. **_(EXCUSE ME?! I'M NOT LIKE THAT.)_

**Likes: Being alone. **_(...Gee, thanks.)_

I took a deep breath. How hard could it be? _Be yourself. _My only concern, was my Japanese. To be frank, I was severely out of practice - not that I exactly had an iron grip on it in the first place. All this business with bowing and honorifics were just...foreign.

"You ready?"

Nod.

He escorted me in with a hand on my shoulder. Perhaps he was trying to be reassuring; to me, it felt forceful. "Class 2-B, this is your new classmate. Knight Serena-san." He wrote my name on the board. Before I could interrupt to tell him that he was saying my name funny, the door slid open.

And in came Hibari.

He glared, and swung at my face with his tonfas. Stepping backwards, my back crashed into the board, and he whacked off my baseball cap. "Hats are against the Namimori dress code."

"It's a medical condition! I have sensitive eyes, asshole!" I shrieked, squeezing my eyes shut. "OW. GOD. BURN." When I opened them again, the room gasped. Hibari actually took a step back.

"What?" I muttered, picking up my hat from the floor. "I thought it was rude to stare."

Hibari studied me from head to toe. "I see," he finally grunted. Grabbing my collar with one hand, he dragged me out of the room.

"Hey! What the fuck, dude?!"

"Hi...Hibari-san!" the teacher called after us rather unhelpfully. Hibari dragged me to his office, picked up a package, and then pushed me to the boys change rooms, surprising a class. Some of the guys ran out half naked. Shoving me into a cubicle, he shut the door and threw a pile of clothes over the top.

"What's this?" I asked, looking at the clothing.

"A _girl's _uniform," he retorted. "Hurry up and change. Perhaps you can attempt to do so without vulgar language."

A girl's...? Oh I see now.

The next time I see Iemitsu, I'll fucking pulverize him.

* * *

><p>Second impressions pale in comparison to the first. I knew that. Thanks to a bunch of irritating men, my alias' image had forever been ruined. I'd had enough of introductions at schools; they could eat shit for all I cared. "Hello," I started, sure to use an English term, "I'm Serena Knight. Call me whatever you want."<p>

My teacher coughed. "Well, um...would you like tell us about yourself?"

"No."

"Are you a cross dresser?" someone called out.

I tried not to yell. "Wrong uniform," I explained through gritted teeth. I'd already figured that I didn't really care about these people. They were just there. Like trees. Or iPhones.

"Um...why did you transfer to Namimori?" one of the nerdy looking girls questioned excitedly.

"Japanese schools are so...kawaii. Kya." Sarcastic Japanese. I guess it exists now. What else was I meant to say? I was here to stalk a Tenth gen mafia family boss?

"What do you like?" one of the guys asked.

"Oxygen." The class looked confused. _Come on – oxygen is the reason living things happen. And it combusts._

"How old are you? When's your birthday?"

"I can't remember." Well actually, I could, but I didn't feel like mentioning it was yesterday.

"Where did you transfer from?"

"Overseas," I awkwardly answered. Iemitsu hadn't exactly specified where.

"Ooh! When did you arrive in Japan?"

"This morning."

"Did your parents move here with you, or were they already here when you came?" the teacher asked, trying to get a legit answer from me.

"My parents died six years ago." I replied flatly. Finally. Something that I didn't have to lie about.

"Oh...uh...sorry..." the teacher muttered. "Well, we don't have any free seats, so I'll - "

"Sensei, Itachi got a scholarship to Yumei Private last night," one of the guys near the back called out. "His desk is free."

_Ah, how convenient. A corner seat too. __Well, I suppose that's all Iemitsu's handiwork... _

* * *

><p>An hour later, the bell rung, and second period began. It felt unusual that the teachers changed rooms - students just stayed in their seats. Actually, it was unbelievably irritating. I'd just about reached my limit of concentration.<p>

"Good morning, everyone," the teacher growled, writing the word 'sup' onto the board. "Does anyone know what this word means?"

I kept my mouth shut, but could barely wipe the grin off my face.

"In many Western countries, teenagers greet each other with the word 'sup'. It's the same as 'hello', but more informal." A few people around me started muttering the word 'sup'. With their Japanese accents, it sounded so...retarded. He continued. "According to scholars, the word 'sup', likely came from the word 'soup', which is - "

"AHA HA HA HA HA!" Whoops. I just couldn't stop myself. Heads turned, and I desperately tried to suppress my laughter. Was I being reserved? Not really. Hot-tempered? ...No. So...how was I supposed to look despicable...?

"Oh, you must be the transfer student. Mind sharing the joke?" the teacher threatened icily, the chalk in his hand snapping in two.

I took my hand off my mouth. "Not really."

"Knight-san, please, stand up."

"Come on, you're just going to tell me to sit right afterwards," I asked, leaning back in my chair. "What's the point?"

"Well then, please, keep your mouth shut, unless you want to teach this class!"

I considered for a moment. "Sure." Strolling in front of the class, I picked up the other half of his snapped chalk, and started writing. "The word 'sup', actually comes from the word 'wassup', which is an abbreviation for 'what's up', which is an abbreviation for 'what is up'. 'What is up', is generally the term for 'how are things going', or 'hello'. Soup has absolutely no relevance. AT ALL."

With as much grace as I could, I tried to toss the chalk onto his desk. It flew out the window. People stared. The teacher looked back and forth at a piece of paper on his desk, and the board. Finally, he started yelling again. "Knight, go to the Disciplinary Committee office!"

"Sure." Just as I left the class, I stuck my head back in. "Um...I'm new, so where _is_ the Disciplinary Committee office?"

* * *

><p>Hibari Kyoya was annoyed.<p>

From the moment he'd encountered her, he'd suspected she was trouble. Only an hour later, his suspicions had been confirmed. Firstly, she was tardy on what appeared to be her first day. Then she disrespected the Namimori school uniform. And now? She looked completely shameless, standing in front of him.

"Um...let's see...please excuse...excuse...uh..." she trailed off in horrific Japanese, pulling out a piece of paper, "excuse my...intrusion? I was rejected from class."

"Hn." Hibari didn't care. He could beat her up, of course, but he wasn't in the mood.

She sighed, and shoved the paper into a pocket. "Look, I'm sorry for being rude, blah blah blah, now you give me detention, send me back to class, and tell me to apologize to my teacher. Right?"

"Hn."

"Well...I think I'll take that as a yes. Nice meeting you again, Hibari-chan." [**A/N**: the diminutive suffix 'chan' is usually used for teenage girls, babies, grandparents, or cute animals. Somehow, I doubt Hibari fits in any of those categories.]

Hibari snapped. Jumping over his desk, he drew his tonfas. "I'll bite you to death!" he hissed.

But the herbivore surprised him. She whipped around and blocked...with...with...a Nokia mobile phone. It was built like a brick. "Chill bro!" she spluttered in defense. "What, is it Kyoya-kun?"

He tried to whack her, but she was faster and dodged, resulting in a hole in his wall.

"I know now! It's Kyoya kouhai!" [**A/N:** Kouhai is used for someone younger than you or the same age as you; a junior.]

At that moment, Hibari's anger went through the roof (not literally of course) and he _glared_. The herbivore didn't budge an inch.

"You're secretly a nickname guy, aren't you? How about Kyo-san?" she decided, triumphant look on her face.

Hibari studied the girl. She didn't look physically strong. In fact, she looked downright weak. She obviously wasn't smart, and lacked concentration. Infuriated, he charged forward, waiting to see if she'd dodge or block.

She yawned. "Sorry, m'got jet lag."

_...I'll bite you to death. _He planned one tonfa for her head, and the other for her hip. And then he made a mistake, and _blinked_. She moved into a defensive stance, aiming for a jab he knew he couldn't dodge at his throat - but in the last moment, she withdrew, taking the full brunt of his attack.

With a small huff, he watched her sway dangerously. _I'll call an ambulance. Broken rib, maybe a fractured skull._

"Is it Hibari-san?" She'd straightened up, as if nothing had happened. "I'll remember that."

Withdrawing, he opened the door. "Go outside. Pick up trash." Kicking her out, he slammed the door in her face, went back to his desk, and took a nap. _How? _

* * *

><p>Considering how Hibari didn't mention how long I was supposed to accustom myself with trash, I headed back to my home room at morning break. A few people (aka. the whole class) tried starting a conversation, but their words fell on deaf ears - my round with Hibari had left me with one hell of a headache, which I was attempting to sleep off.<p>

"Knight-kun, correct?"

I woke to see the first female teacher of the day. "Welcome to 2-B. We're having a test today, so I'll see how you go," she greeted, handing me a small stack of stapled sheets.

It was about functions; something I hated. At least it was straightforward. I started writing at full speed, but I barely completed the last page on time.

"Are you finished yet?"

I scribbled down one more equation. "Here." I flipped the booklet to the front page and handed it to her.

She was about to continue collecting, but she paused and stared at my booklet, flicking through a few pages. "So you've studied this topic before?"

"Uh...I think so...?"

"Huh. I gave you the wrong test. You almost finished in such a short period too. Good job."

*Bangs head on table*. _Why the fuck does my alias have to be intelligent, Iemitsu? Give me a break already._

* * *

><p>At lunch, I escaped to the roof. Some people were asking me questions, and trying to be friendly, but I made excuses and ran away. I wasn't supposed to be a people person; I was an anti-people person, as grammatically incorrect and impossible as it was.<p>

And school roofs were my sort of thing. Isolated. Quiet. Open. I leant on the fence, using a long-distance scope to spy at the teacher's staffroom, while holding a bento I'd bought from the cafeteria, eating a bite every now and then.

**1215 hours: Target gets 12% for his maths test.**

**1220 hours: Target falls down the stairs.**

**1222 hours: Target hides from his crush, Sasagawa Kyoko.**

As I sensed someone nearby, a hand shoved me in the back and I fell painfully, my lunch showering the both of us.

Both, being Hibari and me.

"I'LL BITE YOU TO - "

So you can kinda figure out that the next few hours of school weren't as joyful as I initially hoped.

* * *

><p>After my trip to the infirmary, school was pretty much over.<p>

**1600 hours: Target is in a catch up classes for all subjects.**

I went and bought a few sets of the actual school uniform. As I reached the school gates, I could hear cries of pain. _Wait, is that...that...Iemitsu's kid? _Peeking around the corner, my hunch was confirmed.

_Oh Iemitsu, your son is so...pitiful. What a shitty father you are..._

Should I do something? Iemitsu wouldn't be to pleased if I waltzed in and became his friend...but...he was getting the shit beat out of him. I watched his school books get torn apart. _Hm. And I wondered why he was such a failure in arithmetic. _

Eventually, the guilt took over, and I confronted the group of guys with regent hairstyles. "Good God, you need a haircut."

"Go home!" one of them spat, trying to look intimidating. He was taller than me, but his scowl was...wimpy. I'd seen kittens with more flair. But his words hurt; I didn't have a home to go back to.

Checking the street to make sure no one was watching, I casually sauntered over to Tsuna, stretching my arms, and how did Squalo put it? They 'ran into' my fist.

"Sup. Need some help?" I asked, offering a hand to Tsuna.

"T-Thanks..." he murmured, shakily accepting help. "But you shouldn't help me. I'm Dame-Tsuna. You'll get beat - " He stared briefly the Disciplinary Committee members on the floor, and then back at me. "The Disciplinary Committee doesn't forget..." he warned, putting the remains of his schoolbooks into his bag. _Ah. That's who they are. Hibari has weird taste._

"You know...I don't like the name Dame-Tsuna very much," I admitted. "It's mean."

Tsuna looked up, surprised. "Really?"

"Yeah. Can I call you Baka-Tsuna instead?" I asked brightly.

"..."

"Well, I'm clumsy too. My name's...Serena. Serena Knight," I blurted. _Hang. Why am I introducing myself? This isn't how a normal 'stalker' and 'stalkee' relationship works. And I thought being buddy-buddy with him was a no-no? _"So...you need a hand getting home?"

* * *

><p>Later that night, when Tsuna fell asleep, Nana made a phone call to Iemitsu. "Anata [darling, dear], how's work?"<p>

"_Same as always Nana. How's Japan? How's Tsuna?" _Iemitsu smiled back, putting his feet on his desk. Lal stopped arguing with him and rolled her eyes, leaving his office.

Nana smiled. "I think he made a friend!"

"_A friend? That's great!"_

"Mm! Apparently Tsu-kun fell down the stairs, and this girl helped him home. She refused to stay for dinner though. It's a shame. She was really sweet too. I think her name was...Knight-kun?" Nana tried to recall.

"_Knight-kun, you say..."_ Iemitsu muttered, his eyebrow twitching. _"Be sure that Tsuna doesn't spend too much time with her."_

"Why, Iemitsu? She's pretty cute too."

"_I've heard she has rabies. And she's illiterate. She's illegitimate too,"_ Iemitsu made up on the spot. _"Oh, and she also has AIDS, and permanent swine flu. And bird flu."_ Maybe he was just overdoing it a little...

"I'm sure it's fine, Iemitsu. Tsuna's coming - good night!" Nana giggled, hanging up.

* * *

><p>That night, I got my first video call. I'd just got back from recording what the Sawada family ate for dinner, a visit to the bank, and general shopping when an oversized Iemitsu's face appeared on the wall.<p>

"G'day."

"AARRGGHHH!" I exclaimed, dropping my instant ramen. It was only then, when I realized that an entire wall...was a monitor. Fucking creepy, damn it. 15" was good enough for me.

"You have work. Eliminate the Yamaguchi branch in Namimori. Make a mess. I'll fax you the details. I see you went to school," he added with a yawn. "What do you have on Tsuna?"

My anger for him burned more than the mess. He was making me work 24/7, and he was probably having the time of his life. "He's a loser. No offence. But he's not a bad guy."

"I recall saying to avoid contact," he put in flatly.

"Well then, next time delinquents beat him up, I'll be sure to stand there, watch take a photo, and report it later on," I glared.

"Well then, I'm sure you can think of something else?" he added, clicking a button.

His face was replaced by a wall.

* * *

><p>Hibari Kyoya was feeling bloodthirsty. He stopped walking, and looked around at the quiet neighborhood. Well...he could always finish off a yakuza family branch that Kusakube told him about. What was the name? Yamaguchi?<p>

By the time he reached their supposed hideout, he could sense...death. As he entered, he sniffed disdainfully. It appeared as if someone had tried to paint the walls with blood. Whoever had come - they were skilled; he could tell that much. Quite annoyed to have his entertainment snatched away - the instant he heart a clutter upstairs, he sprinted towards the stairs.

A masked figure was balanced lightly on the window sill. As he entered the room, she (he wasn't quite sure why he thought that, it wasn't obvious) faced him.

"Hibari-san – what a pleasant surprise..." she started, watching him advance with spikes on his tonfas. Hibari glared. The voice's owner was on the tip of his tongue. "Pretty stupid of you to show up. Wearing a school uniform, that is. This is only a small branch; the remainder will target your school. Dress more appropriately dumbshit."

She jumped.

Twice. That was twice, he was belittled. In one day. He couldn't remember the last time that'd happened.

By the time Hibari rushed to the window, she was out of sight.

* * *

><p><em>The following morning...<em>

I was sleep deprived. And in need of painkillers, not that they'd work.

Tsuna was on time for school, thank God. My goal today: avoid a certain obstacle. When I got to school, I noticed that there were quite a few Disciplinary Committee members.

That pointed in my direction when they saw me.

"Please, come with me," the tallest one of them spoke, in a way that wasn't so creepy.

"I'm going to be late for class," I murmured, edging away.

"This will only take a moment."

"A moment my ass..." I sighed. I'd already decided. If they were going to beat me up – I'd let them. And then they'd leave me alone. Win-win situation.

So I was really confused, when he dragged me into the Disciplinary Committee office, and stood in the corner, while Hibari glared intently at me.

_Eep?_

"Iinchou [leader], this is the girl that attacked the members outside the school yesterday," the tall one announced.

"Hn. Thank you Kusakube." _  
><em>

*Cough* "I apologize for my reckless behaviors; I...go...class...now?" I offered, hesitating with my words.

"Who are you?"

"...Excuse me?"

"You are not Knight Serena. Knight Serena, does not exist," Hibari growled, sliding a file onto his desk. "Where were you last night?"

Without a doubt, he knew. HOW? I wore a mask. My clothes were slightly baggy. I bothered messing up my voice. But...but...I CALLED HIM HIBARI-SAN. AH FUCK IT. "I _am_ a transfer student. But I'm really from Italy."

"You're a 'student'?"

"Well," I hesitated, avoiding all eye-contact, "I technically graduated last year. I'm...I'm...an assassin." The guy didn't even look fazed. _Do you know how hard that is for me to admit? ARGH. AT LEAST LOOK MILDLY OFFENDED. _

"Your business in Namimori?"

"Nothing that involves the civilians of Namimori. I plan to...to..." I trailed off, and took a deep breath, failing to find a not-so-stupid explanation. "I plan to conquer the Japanese underworld in the name of the Vongola family."

Hibari stood up and stared outside the window. A minute of silence passed the room. "Wear this, or I'll bite you to death," he suddenly said, throwing over a piece of red cloth with gold kanji I couldn't really read.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night," I shrugged. It was just a stupid armband or something, right?

* * *

><p>When I got back to class, the bell had only just rung. I walked up to one of my classmate's desks and showed them the armband. "Uh...I'm sorry to disturb you, but do you know what this says?"<p>

The girl screamed and fell off her chair.

I decided to ask a guy. He too, fell off his chair.

"Does anyone know what this is?" I asked loudly with a sigh.

"That's a Disciplinary Committee armband!" someone finally yelped _without _falling off their chair.

..._Holy shit! I gotta give this back! _

* * *

><p>Kusakube studied Hibari. "Iinchou, are you sure it's safe for her to stay at Namimori Middle? Why make her join the Disciplinary Committee?"<p>

Hibari passed Kusakube as he walked out of the door. "Because," he replied slowly, "I want to bite that herbivore to death."

* * *

><p><strong>Yup. Pretty weird.<strong>

**Anyways, have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	19. Life's Constant Surprises

Chapter 19 - Life's Constant Surprises

I jigged class. Yeah, I know, jigging on the second day is bad, yada yada yada. But I had a theory that Hibari was secretly trouble magnet. So I strutted down the corridors, venting my stess. "HIBARI-SAN. ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND? WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? SOME FUCKING PRINCE? NO, I KNOW A PRINCE, AND YOU CAN'T EVEN - YOU'RE JUST SO ODD. SHOW YOURSELF!"

After about a minute Kusakube came running up to me. "Knight-san, you cannot be a public disturbance. It reflects badly off the Committee."

"Good! Where's Hibari? I'm such a shameful member - here, take this," I handed Kusakube my armband, "and tell him to shove it up his ass!" _Wow, it felt to get rid of that thing. Felt like a blood-sucking leech. _Turning on my heel, I decided to find a nice quiet spot to take a nap.

"Hang on a minute! You can't just...quit!" Kusakube interjected trailing after me.

"Of course I can. I, Serena Knight of class 2-B, resign from the Dsiciplinary Committe as of today," I announced, bowing politely at him. "There. Now everyone's happy. Have a nice day."

"There are rules! You can't quit unless Hibari-san admits defeat!"

And that's all it took to ruin my day. Arguably, my day hadn't been very upbeat either. You see, at the point, I realised how truly fucked I was. Hibari was...Hibari; I honestly doubted that he would admit losing. Ever.

But...If I beat him publicly...:

_Gets up from floor. "I'll bite you to death!"_

Then if I knocked him out publicly...:

_Next day: "I'll bite you to death!"_

Or maybe I could just ask him nicely...:

_"You're crowding herbivore."_

"_I'M STANDING ALONE."_

"_I'll bite you to death."_

* * *

><p><em>Several days later...<em>

"Knight-san!" a voice rang out, startling me.

"Huh?" I gasped, as the classroom setting dragged me up from hell. "The uh...first twenty elements of the periodic table are hydrogen, helium, lithium, beryllium, boron, carbon, nitrogen, oxygen, fluorine, neon, sodium - "

Nezu Dohachiro, my incredible annoying science teacher, cut my rant short with his notoriously pitiful scowl. "Well, it's lovely that you studied ahead, Knight-san, but how dare you sleep in class!"

"Dude, I wasn't sleeping. I was day dreaming," I informed as a matter of factly.

"That isn't any better!"

"You only give a fuck about tests - which I do quite well in. So what's the fuss?" I yawned, tapping my pen gently on my blank piece of paper. I'd studied enough for a lifetime; I was allowed a Japanese-English dictionary, which covered my only weak point.

He snapped. "That's it! Get out of my class!"

"Gladly." Muttering darkly to myself, I picked up my bag and left, with the gaze of the remainder of my class following my every movement. _I never knew playing the role of a delinquent was so nice..._

I'd almost completely adjusted to my new life. Well, perks of having a dynamic job, I supposed.

My daily routine began at the crack of dawn; within minutes, I would be at the Sawada household, eating some flavourless bread whilst observing steaming hot culinary delights. School started at eight. Hibari found some reason to 'bite me to death' every lunch. I'd stalk Baka-Tsuna until he went to sleep; eat out, send my daily report, and if I was lucky - Iemitsu wouldn't send me to 'clean up' an area, and I'd actually be able to enjoy my nightmares.

The roof was often empty and out of direct sight, so I preferred to take naps there. My cell phone rang, and from force of habit, I picked up immediately.

"_VOOOOOOOOOOOOOOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!"_

For a moment, I found myself murmuring softly. _Limit contact with the Varia...how can I? _"H-Hi."

"_WWHHHAATT?!"_

"H-H-Hi."

"_Why the fuck are you so quiet?!__"_

"I uh...have um...a cold."

_"~Ushi shi shi shi~...dumbass doesn't want to talk to you," _Bel sang on the other end.

"_VOI BEL! GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!"_

"_~Ushi shi shi shi~...m__ake me."_

They started bickering. And when they were done with that; they bickered some more. And after that; they started having a swearing contest. And then they tried to kill each other.

"Come on guys, grow up already..."

"_VOI! TAKE THAT YOU FUCKING PRINCE."_

"_~Ushi shi shi shi~...missed me again, stupid captain. Why don't you let me cut your hair? I was thinking of a bowl cut. Or better yet – completely bald..."_

"_VVVOOOOOIIIIIIII!"_

I couldn't help but smile, and listen in silence. For the first time since I'd arrived in Japan, I slept soundly.

* * *

><p>One night, on my way back to my living space, I felt a slight twinge of loneliness. Stupid human emotion. <em>I'm perfectly happy alone. <em>No you're not. _I am so_. Nope. You're completely lonely. Quickening my pace defiantly, I almost crashed into something.

I stared.

It stared back.

I stared more intently.

It meowed, jumped onto my head, and started purring.

"A black cat. How...unfortunate." _Hang on, they're lucky in Japan, right?_ "Hey buddy. I mean...you're not my buddy..." I corrected quickly, telling myself off for talking to a cat. "You smell...like shit."

"Meow~..." it purred, slipping around my neck. Its tail tickled my nose.

Stopping abruptly, I pulled the cat off me, and held it out by an arm length. "Dude. You, are a stray. And I don't really like cats. I mean, it's not like you're ugly or anything; I'm a dog." Setting it down on the floor, I continued on my way, trying to remember the countless number of twists and turns.

*Yank*. Turning, I noticed the cat's eyes for the first time, glinting in moonlight. One eye was blue, the other was green. Suspicious, I bent down and poked it. "Are you Rokudo Mukuro? Or do you just have heterochromia iridum?" I grumbled, poking it some more. It licked my hand, purring innocently. _  
><em>

_I'm talking to a CAT. Fuck, my life is sad. _"If you're not toilet trained, cough up fur balls all over the place, make a mess of my things or be nasty, you're out. Got it?"

"Meow~..."

Right. Still talking to a cat.

* * *

><p><em>Later that evening...<em>

"Serena! How could you go to Japan without telling me?!" Dino's insulted voice echoed around the living room. Like Iemitsu, he'd chosen to do a video chat. A giant Dino still beat a giant Iemitsu any day of the week.

I dropped the cat. "DINO! DO YOU MIND?!"

"Oh, it's all dark..." he murmured, confused. "That is you, right Serena?"

"It's three...in the morning."

Dino's smile lit up, and he snapped his fingers, as if he had a good idea. "I know! We - "

All the lights came on in an instant. I found that I'd curled up on a coffee table. _ARGH. LIGHT. GO AWAY._

"Hey, the lights came on. That's cool!" he exclaimed, clicking his fingers. The lights went out.

_Snap. _On. _Snap__. _Off. _Snap. _On. _Snap. _Off._ Snap. _On.

"Dino, stop that!" I broke in, trying to avoid a seizure. Being sure not to step on the kitten, I made it to the couch without much self-inflicted injury.

"Oh, sorry Serena," he muttered, obviously still quite pleased with himself. "What up with the cat?"

"Dunno. It's a stray," I shrugged. "I was hoping you'd help me figure out a name."

"Aw come on, it's your cat now, so I'm sure it's fine with whatever you call it," he grinned.

My face turned grim. "All right then. Here's what happens." Turning to the cat, I fearfully held it as far away from my face as it could. "I gonna call you Bob. Is that okay?"

*Attempts to claw out eyes*

"Fine! How about Harry?"

*Bites fingers*

"Ethan! Carl! Indiana! James! Max! Jack!"

"I say he looks like a Crookshanks," Dino mused thoughtfully. The cat stopped struggling at me, and tried ineffectively to attack Dino.

"You see?" I muttered bitterly. "This cat's so stubborn." Almost as if it could understand my thoughts, the cat twisted and sunk its teeth into my hand. "OW. STOP."

Dino chortled. "You guys get along so well. How about nibbles?" he joked. The cat stopped fidgeting and purred contently.

You. Can. Not. Be. Serious.

Setting... 'Nibbles' aside, Dino smiled and continued with the conversation. "I heard from the Ninth about your situation in Japan. How's it going?"

"Fine, fine..." I muttered, trying not to burst out in a barrage of complaints. "Sorry I left so suddenly. How's the financial problem going?"

"Fixed, thanks to you." He stood up and took something from his desk. "Anyways, I have a free slot in a month or two. Why don't you come on a holiday with me?"

"Dino, I'm here to watch the Vongola Tenth..." I stated flatly. "The Ninth is an asshole, remember?"

He shrugged. "Well then, I'll come over to see you! I mean; I was about to come and give you a birthday present, but I find out you're halfway around the world!"

"Shock."

"Yeah...well...you've heard about Reborn being the tutor for the Vongola Tenth, right?" he half announced.

"A shame."

"Hm, true, but Reborn's probably sick of me. Just make sure he doesn't kill the Vongola candidate, kay?" he insisted.

"I'll see."

"Geez, you really got to stop using simple responses. You'll end up with no friends!"

"So?"

"Come on! There! You did it again!"

"Whatever."

He sighed. "I'm only trying to help you, Serena. Be more cheery. You'll live longer."

"Don't care."

* * *

><p>I'd taken my fair share of physical exams in my life. And as per usual, the same four bright red letters mocked me.<p>

I would've loved to sleep more than three hours a night. Yes, I was stressed with everything in my life OTHER than school. Being anti-social did not mean I had the inability to socialise. I did not have issues with my personal image, thank you very much. My face was not sickly 'pale'; I naturally despised sunlight. I was born with white hair, and the countless bruises, cuts and bandages were not a result of _purposeful _self-harm.

Personally, I blame Iemitsu.

Opening the window, I burned my report to ashes rather joyfully. Focusing on my original task, I rifled through the cabinet until I found Tsuna's health report. _Oh wow. That's so...average._

"Herbivore."

Did I mention I wasn't allowed in the school archives? I groaned. _Not today, Hibari._ Seeing as how he was blocking the door, I leapt sideways out of the window, latched onto the gutter and hauled myself to a classroom on the second floor. Thankfully, it was lunch, so the number of people present had been reduced, and most people were too engrossed in their own conversations to notice.

Taking a wary peek out of the classroom, Hibari spotted me from the stairwell. _Shite._

"Ohayo, Kyoya-kun!" I called over my shoulder, breaking through a crowd of girls. Hibari started sprinting. _Uh oh. I forgot he doesn't like being called that. And it's not even morning. _As I turned a sharp corner, I hid behind a group of tall guys. I heard Hibari run past, and I sighed a breath of relief.

"Hey, I've seen you at my family's restaurant," a raven haired carefree guy noticed, studying my frozen face. _Is he Yamamoto Takeshi?! S__hit! I can't assimilate with him! _"Say, we're one person short for a game of baseball. Wanna play?"

I hesitated. _Group of tall guys...baseball...well, it's not somewhere Hibari would look, right?_

* * *

><p><em>Thwack! <em>I watched the ball sail over the field. Adrenaline ran through me, and I ran to the first base, bat gripped tightly in my hands. "Out!" someone called. _What?_

"You can't run with the bat stupid," the guy on first base explained. I resisted the urge to smash his head in.

"Now now, don't worry about it," Yamamoto grinned casually. "Serena doesn't know the rules, so it doesn't matter. Good shot..."

"Kya! Yamamoto's so nice!" his personal fan club chanted. *Facepalm*.

"That's not fair, Yamamoto!" another complained. "You're only saying that because she's on your team!"

Yamamoto's fan club booed. _  
><em>

"Fine, at least give her another shot, alright?"

Grudgingly, the other team agreed, and I braced myself. _Drop the bat. Drop the bat. Here it comes... _WHACK. Immediately after the ball made contact, I let go of the bat mid-swing...and it spun into my face.

*How do you even...*

Blood spurted from my head as the ground rose up. "Aah! Are you okay?" someone asked, their voice a hollow echo.

"Quick, go get the nurse!"

"Stop crowding around her!" *becomes part of the crowd*

"Serena, how many fingers?" Yamamoto asked, trying to get my attention by waving his hands around. His fan club cursed at me.

I sat up best I could, trying to focus. "Twelve," I muttered. Hang on. That was an understatement. It was more like twenty.

"Hey, Knight, why don't you try out for the baseball team?" someone asked. "You've got a nice swing."

"Sure. Whatever," I jabbered. I wasn't really thinking at the time. Why? Because I saw Hibari running towards me. Using my sleeve to wipe off some blood out of my eyes, I scrambled up and took off in a zigzag.

* * *

><p>Sometimes, I have nightmares of Reborn smiling over my sleeping figure.<p>

"Ciaossu, Serena."

And other times, it's not a nightmare. Why, oh why, was there a baby with a fedora hat in existence? "R-Reborn...what brings you here so early? In Japan? In _my_ living room?" _  
><em>

"Did you forget I was coming? Tut tut Serena. The Ninth just wanted me to drop by at your residence first. To check up on you."

"How did you getin here?"

"The front door." His emotionless eyes were unnerving.

"Shouldn't you be at Baka-Tsuna's, telling him you're his new tutor and terrorising his life?"

"I was hoping you'd escort me to his home."

"If you found me, you definitely won't have any trouble finding him."

"For old time's sake?"

With a sigh, I sat up, tousling my bed hair. Dragging my arm in front of my face, the moving hands began to slow down enough for me to make sense of them. A whole _hour_. That's how much longer I could've slept?! "You know, if I recall clearly, old times weren't so sake worthy."

* * *

><p>We ran into Yamamoto on the way, and apparently I agreed to try out for the baseball club, so Reborn and I went out separate ways.<p>

Several hours later, I made my way to the school drinking fountains, exhausted. I'd completely forgotten about Reborn, Tsuna and everything that I was in Japan for. Walking back, I passed the front gate. "Hey Serena!" Yamamoto grinned, catching up with me, still with his baseball gear. "Do you know where the - "

"AAAHHHH!" _Wow. Who knew people could fly. No wait...he's just falling with style. _Yamamoto threw his bat over to me, and caught Mochida, who I think was the captain of some other sport team.

"Nice catch!"

"As expected of the baseball club!"

"Kyaa Yamomoto-kun!""

And of course, no applause for me. Enthusiastic, popular _and _athletic - how did he end up as Tsuna's friend again? Heck, why couldn't Tsuna be like him? "It's the guy from my class..." he muttered. Moving my focus to what Yamamoto was staring at, I did a double take. _I still don't understand the whole underwear deal..._

"SASAGAWA KYOKO! PLEASE GO OUT WITH ME!" Students stared. Teachers stared. Those who'd already gone to their classrooms pressed their faces against the window. And the whole school was for just a moment, completely still.

"Kya!" Kyoko screamed, running into the school. Mochida stood up to the baffled Tsuna (now lacking a dying will flame), and punched him in the face.

"You creep!"

Coming to the decision that Tsuna had earned enough attention, I clapped my hands loudly. "What are you all staring at? Don't you have classes to be at?!" _Lol. I'm actually acting like a Disciplinary Committee member._

* * *

><p>And so, I waited with the rest of the school for Tsuna to arrive in the gym. A minute or two passed, so I borrowed a shinai [bamboo sword thing] and played around with it. I was having such a good time swinging it around that I didn't even notice Tsuna turn up.<p>

"Let's go Sawada!"

Hastily, I stopped playing around with the shinai, walked up to Yamamoto and gave it to him. "Do me favor, and chuck this at Tsuna."

He stared at me bizarrely, but did so nonetheless. "Tsuna!"

And Tsuna, being the genius he was, fumbled and dropped it. *Facepalm*. As the match began, Tsuna ran around in circles, with Mochida chasing him, grinning darkly. _...Why is nothing happening?_

Slinking through the crowd, I found Kyoko. "Sawada's really fighting Mochida coz he thinks he's a jerk, and you deserve better," I whispered. She obviously didn't get my implication of Tsuna having feelings for her.

"Really senpai?" she asked, her worried eyes staring into my own.

"Of course. Sawada's a thoughtful guy."

Tsuna tripped and fell to the floor. "Sawada-kun! Do your best!" Kyoko called out.

There was a cough - it was barely audible, but I'd used enough silencers to recognise the sound. Tsuna's clothes...shredded themselves. _Must be the dying will bullet. _"YOU THINK I'D ONLY GET ONE POINT? I HAVE A HUNDRED POINTS NOW." Rip. Rip. Rip. Rip. _What a waste of hair..._

The judge seemed to be taking his time; so I figured I'd give him a little push. Well, I jabbed a pressure point on his back, but same difference. Tsuna's flag shot up.

_Everything's going...just like my dream. Is that chick...Alexandra Knight...she's serious?_ _Oh well, I'll give it a shot. _Now technically, Gokudera was meant to be watching outside the door. And...no Gokudera. My smile dropped. "Looking for me?" Reborn squeaked, hanging down in front of me.

"Surprisingly; no. Are you calling anyone over from Italy?"

"What for?"

*Shatters*. _What...what is this? Did I have a faulty dream? What am I supposed to do?!_

"Oh, and I need you to poison a few people. Just for a day or two," Reborn shrugged. "Make sure Tsuna participates in the volleyball match tomorrow. I'll leave the rest to you."

* * *

><p>Since Reborn was Tsuna's new stalker, I at least got more time to myself. And what did I do with all that extra time?<p>

Stress.

And about what?

My place in the universe.

_Gokudera's not here yet. HE'S FRICKING LATE. On second thoughts, Reborn hasn't even called him to come. Why? Hell! _Crashing on the sofa, I lay down, my mind racing. I dozed off.

_Later..._

Cigarette smoke. A rough cough. Before I was completely awake, I had the intruder pinned onto the floor. "Who sent you?!" I barked, scrabbling for the nearest object. Which turned out to be an orange.

"Oi! Get off me bitch! I'm your cousin!"

"Uh huh, and I'm a potato," I mocked, shaking my head to clear my vision. "No really, who are you?"

"Serena, fricking get off me already!"

I looked at the intruders face. He looked back.

OH SHIT. IT ACTUALLY WAS GOKUDERA.

We stared at each other across the table. Rather civilly, too. "So, Gokudera, what brings you to Japan?" I finally spoke, drinking some water.

"I'm broke. I couldn't contact you; rumored you were in Japan," he shrugged.

"Let me get this straight; you're broke, but you can afford to fly to Japan?" I questioned suspiciously.

"Snuck on."

I folded my arms onto the table and buried my face. "So; instead of looking for work when you're broke, you come looking for me. And you left the country...based on a fucking _rumor_?!"

"Tch. It was easier."

I studied his face, restraining the urge to sigh. _It's kinda great he's here, isn't it? I mean, that solves basically all my problems at the moment. BUT. I AM STILL VERY, VERY UPSET._ "Come on Gokudera. We've got some pizzas to deliver."

* * *

><p><em>The following morning...<em>

"Herbivore, explain this," Hibari inquired, slipping a document of some sorts across his desk. I recognised the roll for class 1-A. "Tell me what you see."

"Uh...lots of people have stomach aches?" I offered innocently. "So um...maybe they were infected from the same source."

"Those people are all on the volleyball team playing at lunch today. Start talking."

"That is _such_ a coincidence."

He crossed his legs, and I knew that he knew more than I could've anticipated. "Pizza?"

I ground my teeth together. "Just because I was a pizza delivery girl for one night, and all the people that are away today from volleyball team in class 1-A just happened to have a free pizza delivery last night, doesn't make me responsible!" I stood up, turned on my heel and marched out of the room. Once I made it outside without being 'bitten to death', I let out a deep breath. _I...can't believe he bought it. _

Gokudera, who was waiting outside the room for me, smirked. "I take your meeting went quite well?"

"Rather. How was class?"

"Easy."

"That's coz you're what; two years older than them? I can't believe I didn't even know you were older than me," I snorted, taking out an apple and tossing it to him.

"If you knew that, why the hell did you put me in that class?!" he growled, clearly unhappy.

"You know that kid that sits two or three rows in front of you?"

"The kid everyone's talking about?"

"Sawada Tsunayoshi. He's the heir to some mafia family. If you kill him, your financial problems will be history."

Gokudera eyed me curiously. "Why don't you kill him yourself?"

"Not bothered. Just wait till after the volleyball match. He's a loser at heart, really."

* * *

><p>The moment I was alone at school, I found myself being dragged into a tiny space.<p>

"Ciaossu."

_The way he says it...as if I'm not supposed to be offended at all. _"Reborn, can't we talk outside of your stupid base?" I grunted, trying to find a comfy position to sit. How on earth was anyone meant to fit in a _fire _hydrant?

"Why have you called over Gokudera Hayato?" he asked, ignoring my insults, drinking espresso in a calm manner.

"He's an acquaintance. He was broke, so I set him up here."

Reborn seemed to be in deep thought. "The hurricane bomb would be a great subordinate for Tsuna. Good thinking, Serena."

I was about to say something along the lines of HOLY SHIT YOU GAVE ME A COMPLIMENT when the door of the fire hydrant opened. "Ciaossu, I'm having my coffee break right now."

"Why are you in there? HIIIIIIIEEE! Serena-san! Why are you with Reborn? He's dangerous!"

_Ah, Tsuna doesn't know I'm with the mafia... _"Oh, this...this...uh..." I trailed off, trying to find a nice descriptive word for Reborn. _Evil? Nah. Powerful? Nope. I've got it. _"This self-centered – I mean...cute baby invited me...into this fire hydrant...for some...life advice."

* * *

><p>Screw Hibari. The entire school watched as he made me sweep the court, alone. After I was done, I threw the mop at his face.<p>

I missed. And hit the teacher.

"Then sensei, you may begin."

The instructor gave a terrified nod. "We will now begin the match against class 1-A and class 1-C!"

And seconds later, Tsuna was presented with the perfect opportunity for a smash. Tension washed over the crowd. And...he failed. The crowd literally shrunk a few inches.

"What a mess," I heard Gokudera mutter.

"Don't mind, let's keep going," Yamamoto said cheerfully, helping Tsuna up.

They say you can't teach an old dog new tricks; but there are times when new dogs fail too much to learn new tricks. And then there are times when the new dogs fail more than all the old dogs put together – and one of those dogs is called: Tsuna. At the end of the first set, the score was 3 to 21.

I was patching up Tsuna's team when his team members started shouting at him. "Are you really trying, Tsuna?"

"Yeah! If you're just playing around, then leave!"

"We're playing seriously!"

"A-Actually, after that match with Mochida-senpai...I-I kinda twisted my leg..."

Sighing, I tightened Yamamoto's bandage. "Baka-Tsuna, look around. Everyone's injured."

Tsuna had a moment of truth.

But I swear, there had to be a better way of blocking than using his...never mind. At least the team started working with more effort, and they were able to completely crush class 1-C.

Gokudera slipped out with Tsuna, and Reborn appeared casually between them. Before I could follow, someone pushed me into a group huddle. "1, 2, 3, Class 1-A!" Yamamoto cheered.

_Wait...isn't he meant to be with Tsuna? And then he'll ask something about joining the mafia game? Damn – why the hell is he still here?! _"Hey, Yamamoto, do you want to find Tsuna?"

"Nah, let's celebrate! I'm sure he just went to the toilet or something."

Forcing my way out of the crowd, I peeked through the door to see Gokudera bowing to Tsuna in his boxers. "Good lord, do I even want to know?" I tried to keep a straight face. Gokudera shuffled around nervously. Tsuna stuttered something inaudible. "Go pick up your dyna – party poppers, kid," I commended, pointing at Gokudera. Tsuna relaxed.

Facing Tsuna, I had to choose my words wisely. "Next time you decide to strip, Baka-Tsuna, wear cooler boxers." I threw him a key. "There's a spare set of the guy's uniform in my locker."

"T-Thanks..."

* * *

><p>"Serena."<p>

_Argh, what am I going to do? Yamamoto's not Tsuna's friend. Do I have to do something, or will it just magically work out, like Gokudera? _

"Serena!"

Gokudera's shout shook me out of my thoughts. "What?!"

"Can you open the door already?"

_Door...? _Ah yes. I bought Gokudera an apartment - living with you cousin is, after all...slightly awkward. I opened the door, and handed him the key. "T.V, piano, table, kitchen, bathroom, your room," I skimmed over quickly, giving him a vague tour. "The guy who was staying here was murdered last month or something; and some of his crap's still here."

Gokudera picked up a 'Legendary Creatures: Special Edition' magazine. "Did this guy happen to run around screaming about the extra terrestrial?"

I mused for a moment. "No. If I recall clearly, he hung himself in the shower. No need to worry though," I smiled reassuringly. "By the way, you should read one of those magazines every now and then. You might find it entertaining."

"Tch."

Staring at Gokudera, I felt a pang of guilt. He'd come all the way from Italy looking for me; and I'd pretty just thrown him out like trash. "Come by my place any time. I think Nibbles likes you."

He made a face. "Keep your demon cat away from me!"

"If I could, I'd keep it away from myself. Here," murmuring, I took out a fat envelope. "It's probably enough for half a year."

"Tch."

"I'm surprised; I though you would've killed Tsuna. Except...you're his subordinate now..." I trailed off, wanting him to open up in his own time.

Instead of saying something deep and heartfelt, he glared at me. "Why didn't you tell me that he was the Tenth Boss of the VONGOLA FAMILY? I thought he was from 'some' family."

"I thought it might be a nice surprise. And plus, I knew you wouldn't kill him. Reborn wouldn't let you have the chance," I considered, making my way out. "Well, I'm gonna go back to my place now. Peace out, Gokudera. Don't be late for school tomorrow."

"Bitch."

Pretending to look shocked, I sniffed. "Is that really how you greet the person you're financially dependent on?"

"Yes." _  
><em>

* * *

><p><em>About a week later...<em>

It's exciting that I get the loveliest jobs when it comes to school punishments. I mean; I only told my English teacher why it was so funny that he kept on saying the word 'balls' repetitively, and I got kicked out of class. Filing dusty documents was my forte; plenty of experience from CEDEF to the Cavallone family.

"Knight-kun, when you're done with that pile, you can start with the ones in the corner," the school principal pointed, looking at me with a slightly upturned expression.

Of course, this was a punishment. Snort.

Halfway through the morning, some stupid teacher crashed into me as I was lifting a heavy paper-filled box.

"YOU TWO ARE EXPELLED!"

"Calm down Nezu-kun," the principal said quickly with a worried tone.

"How can I stay calm? I was physically assaulted! Sawada and company should be expelled with joint responsibility!"

"You okay?" Gokudera murmured darkly, helping me up. Tsuna standing completely terrified beside him.

"I should ask if _you're _okay," I shrugged, cringing at the sight of the spilled papers. Oh the pain...

"But to expel them now might be too hasty...so I think giving them a probational period should be fine," the principal put in gently, seemingly afraid of Nezu.

"Geez, this fat load of shit has no right to expel a student. Only the principal holds that power; and plus - everyone knows you're a retard, Nezu. No offence," I shot out, shuffling around papers.

Nezu seemed to notice me for the first time. "You! How dare you talk to me like that! Detention!"

"Actually, I'm already in detention," I taunted. "And I can talk to you however damn well I please. In fact, I look down on scum like you!"

Gokudera and Tsuna facepalmed. "Knight-kun, please...just...go back to what you were doing..." the principal sighed.

"Whatever." _There's something very wrong about this scene. 1 – Where the fuck is Yamamoto? 2 – Wasn't this meant to happen like a year later? _

Peeking a glance, Nezu had some sort smirk on his face. "Principal...if I recall, there was 15 year old time capsule buried in the grounds that couldn't be found; and you were going to have some professionals dig it up..."

"Ah...yeah. What about it?"

"Let's have these guys do it! If they find the capsule, this issue will be forgiven. But if the can't...immediate expulsion!"

"WHAT?" Tsuna and I yelled simultaneously.

I coughed, and turned back to sorting. Oh, no, I wasn't involved at all.

* * *

><p>"What should I do? I can't let Juudaime be expelled!" Gokudera yelled, shaking me by the shoulders.<p>

I raised an eyebrow at the word 'juudaime', but thought better not to question it. "Well then, since it's kinda your fault, you might as well try finding the time capsule."

"Are you kidding? Dig up all the school grounds? Are you fricking crazy? The whole place is way too -"

"Gokudera," I broke in. "I thought you were smart." Reaching into his pocket, I took out a dynamite. Instantly, he regained his composure and ran off with renewed enthusiasm. "Just talk to Reborn first!" I advised, hoping he heard me. _Oh well, time to get back to moving paperwork._

Just as I was putting the last box onto the shelf, there was a range of explosions, and a mini-earthquake. Unfortunately, the stool I was standing on was already unbalanced.

"AAARGGGH FUCK!" Rubbing my head, I lifted a loose piece of paper from my face. Hang on. The name seemed familiar. "Nezu Dohachiro. Graduated in the class of 1960, after repeating eight grade three times."

When I got back to the principal's office, there seemed to be a whole lot of shouting.

"Now, why would the tests of an elite-course guy like you be buried in the grounds of our school?!" Gokudera barked.

"T-That's not me!"

"Oh yeah? How many idiots called Nezu Dohachiro are there in this world, huh?"

"That's not me!"

I chose that moment to crash the party. "Hey dude, look what I found when I was sorting old school records," I smiled, feigning a gasp. "This guy's face looks awfully familiar to yours, doesn't it?"

"Well...well..."

"And according to the Japanese Education System Law number 47, section 2F, fourth line from the bottom, you're automatically fired for providing false information. Oh look, it's time for lunch..." I trailed off, tossing the documents in front of the principal and stretching.

It was a great day. I didn't actually do much; but it felt..._right_. Well, there was one down side - since Gokudera was financially dependent on me, I took the fine for the damage of school property. "You've got to be kidding," I twitched, staring at the long list of numbers. "Can't Baka-Tsuna chip in too?"

"Well...I said I'd take care of it," Gokudera muttered sheepishly. "It's not even that much."

"Not much? Why don't you try paying that off?!"

"You said you'd pay for my living expenses..."

"THIS ISN'T A LIVING EXPENSE, GOKUDERA. IT'S CALLED A FINE."

* * *

><p>The following day, I was determined to get into contact with my 'other' self. Thinking about my place in the universe...well, made absolutely no sense. I knew for a fact I was slowly going insane. Well, more insane.<p>

As I washed my face in the girl's bathroom, I stared at the mirror before me. "Alexandra Knight. I know you're in there. I can't exactly see you; I'm sure you can see me. What the fuck it going on?"

No reply.

"What the hell do you want me to do?" I hissed. "Is this some kind of a joke to you?!"

No reply.

"Gah! This is exactly why I don't believe you. Whenever I need something from you – you act like you know nothing; or you don't exist. But whenever I _don't _– "

*flush*

I shut up abruptly. "Talking to my dead grandma," I lied awkwardly to the baffled girl. "Complicated relationship."

* * *

><p><em>Maybe I can try to hypnotize myself. Or...or...telepathy.<em>

"Are you listening, Knight-san?!" my English teacher roared.

"Totally."

"Oh yeah? What was I just talking about?"

"If I was listening or not...?"

"Before that!"

Um...uh...well. About that. "You were talking about the...the...awesomeness of a tree." Before the teacher could interject, I put up my hands in defense and got up. "Never mind; I'll just go to the Disciplinary Committee office..."

Walking down the empty corridor, I stopped and stared out the window. _Somehow, this is becoming a daily habit. Five minutes into the first class of the day and I get busted._

"Herbivore."

It was a greeting. _Even Hibari knows I'm a regular_. "What is it today? Are you going to 'bite me to death'?" I growled, letting frustration turn into depression.

"No."

_HALLELUJAH. _

"You'll be replacing Nezu Dohachiro for class 1-A."

"...Huh?"

* * *

><p>Look on the bright side. I wasn't an awful teacher... At least it was easier to keep an eye on the plot of the story. I suppose I was alright in explaining things – despite Tsuna's ghastly score (at least it was higher than fifty percent), class 1-A got the highest half yearly marks.<p>

And 1-A's science classes just so happened to clash with my English lessons, so I didn't have to wait to be kicked out of every class. Better yet, it was the perfect opportunity to gain access to Tsuna's learning profiles.

So in a spaced-out good mood (yep, my mood was pretty volatile), I didn't quite notice the depth of Yamamoto's depression.

"All right everyone! Baseball tryouts are next week. The best ten will make it into the team. So rest up, and don't be late for practice," the coach announced. "Third years on pack-up duty today. Dismissed."

Yamamoto hung around a bit, and asked to stay a bit longer.

_Ah, young people try so hard. _I patted him on the back. "Break a leg!"

* * *

><p>The following morning, there was a large crowd. A few people ran past me, and I heard a few words.<p>

"Yamamoto's on the roof! He's gonna jump!"

"What?! Why?"

"He pushed himself too hard yesterday. He ended up breaking - "

_Oh my God, not his leg! I wasn't being serious!_

" - arm."

_...Oh. _As I ran to the front of the crowd, I frantically searched for an option. "YAMAMOTO. THIS ISN'T FUNNY!"

He picked me out from the crowd. "Heh. Sorry, but that's not true. After God threw away my baseball, I have nothing left," he said dejectedly. Tsuna somehow blundered onto the roof, and Yamamoto turned to face him. "If you came to stop me, it's no use. You should be able to understand my feelings."

"EH?" Tsuna gasped, taking a step back.

"For someone that's called Dame-Tsuna all the time, you can understand the feeling of preferring to die over failing at everything, right?"

For a moment, I blanked out. _Yamamoto's actually gonna do it. THIS IS OBVIOUSLY IMPORTANT PART OF WHAT'S MEANT TO HAPPEN. WHY DIDN'T I FRICKING FORSEE THIS? ARGH._

"Unlike you, I've never put effort into one single thing," Tsuna rambled from above. "I arrogantly told you 'effort' and such, but really I've done nothing...so...so...uh..."

"BAKA!" I blurted as loudly as I could. Yamamoto's attention snapped to me. "STOP BEING SO SELF-CENTERED! HAVEN'T YOU EVER CONSIDERED WHAT OTHER PEOPLE MIGHT FEEL?" _My throat's killing me...how does Squalo do this so often? _"DYING IS JUST SELFISH. Think about you Dad! Your fan club! The baseball team! How do you think they would feel? Have you ever considered that, Yamamoto?!"

"Serena..." he muttered.

"You're arm isn't gonna be broken forever! But if you jump; you're gonna be gone forever! You've already got a spine, so grow a brain!"

I saw him think it over.

Tsuna, however, was still rambling on. "So, I can't understand your feelings...sorry. Later!" he practically yelled, bolting off, clearly not wanting to be involved by any means possible. But I relaxed. Yamamoto wasn't going to commit suicide. I'd probably done my part okay.

"Wait, Tsuna..." Yamamoto muttered, grabbing onto his shirt.

And then Tsuna crashed into the rusty fence...and shoved into Yamamoto...and suddenly, they were both falling. People screamed and looked away. I, on the other hand, couldn't peel my eyes off the scene. A split second passed, and I swore I heard a gunshot.

"SAVE YAMAMOTO WITH MY DYING WILL!"

Tsuna landed with Yamamoto in his arms, bridal style. Unfortunately, he landed on me.

A whole crowd of people, and he lands on me.

"AH MOTHERFUCKING HOLY CATAPULT SAWADA ASSHOLE YAMAMOTO FUCK KILL DIE PAIN – "*faints*

* * *

><p>It's amazing. Now I have a broken arm that matches Yamamoto. Not only that, but I also have a sprained ankle, two bruised ribs and a black eye to add to my unneeded collection.<p>

There was a light knock on the school's infirmary. "Um...Serena-san, may I come in?"

I closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep. Tsuna was the last person I wanted to see. Mainly coz I was his science teacher and he kinda realized I spent a lot of time staring at him. My bad.

The door swung open, and he stood beside me bed. After half a minute, I couldn't take it anymore. Playing dead/asleep was something that I just couldn't do. "AHA HA HA HA!"

"HIIIIEEE!" Tsuna squealed, taking a step back and crashing into a trolley of medical supplies. I watched him fall, and couldn't help but smile. He reminded me of Dino. And maybe...just a little of myself.

"What is up, Baka-Tsuna."

"The...sky?"

I rolled my eyes. "Why does everyone in Japan say that?! Call me Serena. Who needs all that 'san' and 'kun' crap? Right, so why are you...here?"

"I uh...wanted to apologize for this morning..." he trailed off, looking in some other direction. "Are you okay? I mean, are you in pain or anything?"

"I'm in very much pain. Why thank you for asking." Tsuna looked upset, so I figured it was unfair to yell at him. He did, after all, save Yamamoto. So I did my best to smile and not end up looking retarded. "Don't worry about it Tsuna, I get beat up all the time. Good job saving Yamamoto. What'd he say?"

"W-We're friends now," he replied with a small smile, scratching his cheek.

"REALLY? THAT'S WONDERFUL." _Oh the joy~_

"Er...Serena? You're acting strange...should I get the nurse?" he muttered, inching away.

"I'm fine. Honest." Awkward silence passed. "Well, Tsuna, you should go and have lunch with Yamamoto and Gokudera. You three are all friends now, right?"

"Friends...?" he said doubtfully, with a 'come on, really?' face. "Well then, I'm sorry for...everything. I'll leave now."

"Thank you for visiting."

And just as I was about to doze off for real... "Get up herbivore. I'll bite you to death."

I let one eye fly open. A tonfa was an inch from my face. "I'm injured."

"That is of no concern."

"I'm actually _really_ injured. I might _die_."

"Exactly."

"..."

_Fact no. 247: Talking to Hibari Kyoya, is like talking to a brick wall._

* * *

><p>It took twelve heavily scented candles, three hours of attempted meditation and a heavy metal CD for me to get through to Alexandra Knight.<p>

"Geez, let me rest already..." she yawned, sitting beside my meditation stance. Considering we were in a void...I didn't know how she could technically sit...yup, screw that.

"You - ! How can you be so casual?!" I shouted at the top of my lungs. "This is a serious issue!"

"Argh, our first meeting in two years, and this is your greeting?"

"Stop screwing with me! I thought you knew what was meant to happen!" I went on. "Wasn't Reborn meant to call Gokudera over to Japan? And why did Yamamoto attempt to suicide, huh?"

She groaned. "I might've mentioned this. Katekyo Hitman Reborn - or your world, is an anime and manga in mine. So technically, there are two plots. They'll probably intertwine on their own. I didn't bother reading the manga until the anime finished," she tried to explain. "Look on the bright side. Gokudera's Tsuna's subordinate; and Yamamoto's still alive. Congrats."

"So...you're saying...you...I just have to make this up as I go?" I muttered. _How much did I stress over Yamamoto? Holy fuck, I swear, this'll be the end of me..._

"Precisely. I should mention; since my life's stopped at fifteen years and two weeks, you probably won't age when you hit that mark. Just saying," she shrugged. "See ya."

"Wait - !" But it was too late. The last scented candle burned out, and my cat pushed the CD played off the table.

Curses.

* * *

><p><strong>This chapter ended up being pretty self-centred. I can't even count the number of times I used the word 'I'. Shocking, really.<strong>

**Oh well, have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	20. Shit Happens

Chapter 20 - Shit Happens

Terry Luck.

She was about my age; and I can't say I like her very much at first. She was just one of those people born to say 'you hold, I punch' - in which case the punching bag being me. It was towards the end of winter in Japan – and Iemitsu had video chatted me while in his awfully air-conditioned office in Italy, several thousand miles from my current place in Japan. I practically shivered under the invisible waves of cool air.

"Serena. You've got work. A friend of mine needs a favor."

"You have friends?" I asked skeptically.

*ignores*. "There'll be a girl coming over to Namimori for a while; she has enemies from her time with the government. Help her settle - "

"Government?" I questioned, cutting him off. "With or against?"

"With."

_Half the governments in the world want me dead so... _"So you're asking me to assist...a government."

"Are you deaf or something?"

As a matter of fact, I am.

Upon meeting this 'girl', I was very much offended. Terry Luck had excellent badass fashion taste (leathers and all), killer sunglasses, yet attracted no attention from the remainder of the airport. "Hi. I'm here to - " I started politely, offering a handshake. She walked right past me.

I trailed after her, sighing, as she led me into a bathroom. "Hi," I tried again. "I'm - "

She put a hand up. "Let's settle things. I'm a spy."

_You are? Well, that sheds some light. _

"You're an assassin."

_Glad to know Iemitsu spilled his beans. Now I'll spill his intestines._

"I don't need friends. And I don't need trash like you."

Well then, isn't that nice. "It's funny; the last guy who called me trash ended up as an ice cube." She opened her mouth to retort, but I held up a hand for silence. "You work for the French, you're of Vietnamese descent, and Iemitsu loves you dearly."

Her eyes wavered, and I guessed I had hit the truth. "And how would you know?"

I tapped my head. "Trash can have brains too. Now. It's been awfully quiet and nicely scented in this bathroom, hasn't it been?"

"..."

"Guess how many people are here?"

"Seven."

"Bingo."

The corner of her mouth twitched. "Are they..."

I pulled out a tranquilizer gun. "You don't have to like me. You don't have to be my friend. But I have a job to do."

* * *

><p>Jigging classes was always an unintelligent idea, but I was playing a customary game of chess with Squalo (over the phone).<p>

"Knight...to D6. Check. Which means your queen is mine..."

"_Tch. I can't believe I didn't see that coming..."_ Squalo's voice growled back over the Bluetooth earpiece.

Class was almost over. _The teacher might go looking for me if I don't get back from my 'toilet expedition' soon. _"You've pretty much lost the game now. Wanna call it quits?"

"_VOI! I haven't lost yet. Till the end with my dignity."_

"Blah blah blah...okay then. I'm taking your rook too now. Knight to C8."

"_...Well, I have a mission. Seems like we won't be able to finish this."_

"Excuses, Squalo. Excuses."

"_VOI! It's the honest truth!"_

I clicked my tongue. "Well, since I have more points, it's technically my win. Therefore you owe me a new car."

"_You can't even get a license yet! What the fuck's the point?"_

"Collecting. I have a Porsche, Ferrari, BMW, jet, motorcycle and a jeep now. So no worries when I smash my first vehicle," I mused.

"_VOI! The point IS to be worried when you smash your first...whatever. Aren't you on duty right now?"_

Duty? Putting my arms behind my head, I took my time gazing at the sky, feeling the wind move through my hair. The last few weeks had been mayhem.

* * *

><p><em># Bianchi and Lambo<em>

It's extremely unfortunate to have a bunch of dead crows fall on you while you try to soak in some vitamin D on the school roof.

"Ciaossu, Serena," Reborn greeted, getting up from where he was seated beside me head. _How long has he been – _"It's better if you don't eat that," he continued to Tsuna, who was sitting a couple yards away. "You'll go to heaven with one bite."

"Reborn!"

"Ciaossu, Bianchi."

I suddenly became inclined to have a peek. Familiar eyes met my own. "Bianchi? What the hell are you in Japan for?"

"You too Serena? Again? Hang on...don't tell me you're with Reborn…" she trailed off, and her aura suddenly changed. "How could you – I thought you were my friend!" she cried indignantly. "How dare you steal my Reborn from me?"

...Huh?

"Poison cooking!"

And many surprisingly sharp pizzas later, (how Bianchi ever got the idea that I was Reborn's new girlfriend; I would never know), she put on a melodramatic face. "Poor Reborn! That means that if the Tenth doesn't die in some horrible accident, Reborn will never be free!"

Later that evening, I bumped into her once more, and she had a _really _pissed expression. "Uh...Bianchi! What a pleasant surprise?"

"Serena. Help me kill the Vongola brat."

*Cough* It's not like I could've gotten Tsuna off the hook like I'd done with Dino. "Well...think about it this way. If the kid dies, Reborn will hate you for all eternity, since he is the Vongola Tenth and all," I answered logically.

"Love trumps hate."

_No it doesn't?_ Not in the mood to argue with a stubborn person, I was just about to say 'sure! Let's kill the damn guy!' when a section of the wall parted, and Reborn casually walked through. Bianchi had her arms around him in an instant. "Reborn!"

"Bianchi. I told you before. Unless Tsuna becomes the Vongola Tenth, I can not leave."

"But..."

"Guys!" I called out, hand over my eyes. "Calm down. We can be diplomatic with this. Reborn – why don't you just make Bianchi Sawada's...I dunno. Home ec. tutor?"

"Serena, I can't teach a boy like him. And plus, why should I?" Bianchi remarked. "What's in it for me?"

"You...uh...get to stay...underneath the same roof as Reborn?" I made up on the spot. "I don't think Nana will mind...though it's hard to say - she creeps me out...but..." Trailing off, I sighed. Bianchi was hugging Reborn like a stuffed toy. Stuff it; that would probably have to do.

Turning the corner, TYL Lambo was covered in purple cake. Oh, it must be taro.

Wait. Since when was Lambo in Japan...?

* * *

><p><em># I-Pin<em>

"So, class 1-A. I assume you all did your homework, but apparently we have cleaning duty today. Whoopee," I announced unenthusiastically. There was a collective groan around the room.

"Serena."

I stared at the mop curiously. _Since when did cleaning equipment talk? _Something landed on my head, and I shook the thought off. "Oh, it's you Reborn. Something up?"

"Does something have to be up for me to have a conversation with you?"

"...Yes."

"Fair enough. There's a rumor that the Arcobaleno Fon's around town. You remember him, I assume?"

"Kinda. Asian, red clothing, looks a bit like Hibari?"

"They are related, you know."

"Yeah, and why are you telling me about – what?! Spill it Reborn!"

"I don't really know the details myself though. You'd have to ask one of them. Give me a lift to Tsuna."

"Tch. What am I to you? A free cab?"

Reborn smirked. "Something similar, yes." As I turned into the corridor Tsuna was cleaning, I almost tripped over an egg. No hang on, it was a kid. The pieces took a while to click together. I-PIN. I GET IT NOW.

"Up," she stated, pointing to the ceiling.

"Er...why?"

"Up," she repeated, glaring at me. Or squinting? She left in a hurry.

"Baka-Tsuna. You're good with kids right? Come help me," I decided, dragging Tsuna by his tie.

"W-Wait! Serena!"

Not quite sure with what was going on; I took a cautious sweep of the roof before stepping out. Last count, I-Pin made a mistake and tried to kill Tsuna right? Pushing Tsuna in front of me, I-Pin jabbered something I wasn't quite listening to.

"Hey, do you know this kid, Tsuna?" I asked, trying to play my part.

"W-Well...yesterday...h-he helped me with a dog..." he replied, almost embarrassed. "What did he say?"

"He said: please step away from the girl, or I'll kill you as well," Reborn's voice echoed from beside me.

I pointed at myself. "Girl? Wait, wait, what?!"

* * *

><p>"Yo! You're back again?" Yamamoto's father asked, wide grin on his face.<p>

There really was nothing like sushi after a long cay. "Yup. What do you suggest I try this time?" I asked, trying to grin back, but I just wasn't in the mood to.

"Well...how about some uni?"

"What is it?"

"Sea urchin."

"Uh...you never know until you try right?"

"True! Take a seat first, alright?" he smiled, gesturing to a seat beside a guy in a purple outfit and round shades.

I didn't like the look of him.

He was...suspicious looking, to be blunt. I mean, there was a live monkey on his head. Probably some endangered species. And the collar of his jacket covered his mouth – the monkey was actually eating the sushi.

Who goes to a high quality sushi restaurant so their monkey can eat sushi?

Ignoring my doubts, I sat down and thought about my singed uniform.

I-Pin actually tried to kill me. I mean, it was a pretty outdated photo, but it actually was me, despite her horrific eyesight. Tsuna only said that one line that made her embarrassed (it wasn't even that offensive, now that I think about it) and she latched onto me. It was like one of those alien babies in a horror movie with bad CGI. _  
><em>

"What'd I ever do to Fon?" I muttered, picking up my chopsticks. "I thought he was a calm and thoughtful guy..."

"I was interested in your reaction. I-Pin is only five, after all."

Oh look, the guy in the purple could actually talk. _The hell? _"Who are you?" I asked curtly, accepting a bizarrely sloppy piece of sushi. Sea urchin. I admit, the first bite wasn't all that great. It took a lot of effort to keep my mouth shut.

There was a light tut. "You don't remember," the guy teased, lowering his glasses.

_Those eyes... _"Well...you remind me of someone who wants to give me brain damage, and I've tried to forget my past multiple times, so...no. Sorry?"

He sighed. "Kyoya really is quite violent, isn't he?"

I snapped my fingers at him, triumphant. _I REMEMBER. FON. Well. I'm sorry for my terrible manners. How's life? _That's what I would've liked to say - but I was choking on sea urchin. Not pleasant. At all.

* * *

><p><em># Haru and Ryohei<em>

Iemitsu's orders were becoming ridiculous. My last few nights were spent weeding and pruning Tsuna's garden. SERIOUSLY?!

I drooped over the railing to a waterway, trying to take in as much clear air as I could. Holding my mobile at an arm's length, dangerously hovering over the water, I dialed Dino. Now, having a headache and all, I didn't realize Haru chasing up Tsuna in some samurai outfit. Well I did, but I figured that was some 'cray cray' stuff in my head.

After almost half a minute, someone answered. _"Ciao..."_

"Dino! Hi."

"_Serena, it's two in the morning,"_ he groaned groggily in reply, "_what is it?"_

Haru attempted to stab Tsuna with a hockey stick. Tsuna attempted to run away. "...Wondering."

"_Wondering...?"_

*Watches Tsuna scream*. I shook my head and focused on our conversation. "I need a holiday. Do you think you could ask the Ninth for me?"

_"I'll give it a shot.__" _I could've sworn I heard Gokudera screaming. "_Oh, but I am coming to Japan..."_ Dino explained hurriedly, but I was too mesmerized with a cascade of dynamite to heed his words of great importance.

BOOM.

I have an excuse for falling into the river. Sleep deprivation. That, however, was not an excuse for Haru to cling onto me like a piece of driftwood. "S-Save *cough* save me!" she cried, pushing my head under again. Flailing my arms, I too tried to yell something helpful, but it came out more like 'blu blurgh blur bl blur!'.

Yet despite all this, I was well aware that Hibari Kyoya would be rather displeased if I didn't have a short spar with him – hence giving me no option but to attend school, sit in my corner seat, dripping not-so-clean water all over the floor. That could've been why people around my classroom were currently staring – correction, looking 'vaguely in my direction'.

"Class 2-B, we have an announcement from the captain of the boxing club," the teacher announced, with a menacing tone oddly directed to my corner.

"EXTREME! WHERE IS THIS KNIGHT PERSON?"

Crap. Now people weren't just 'vaguely looking in my direction'.

"We need extreme guys like you! This afternoon, me against you," Ryohei boomed, punching air.

"I know a guy that's way more extreme," I blurted, looking up from my chair. "His name...is...uh...give me a second here..." _Mental blank at a time like this?_

"I know!" he decided victoriously on his own. "That Sawada kid! EXTREME!"

...Right. You do that.

* * *

><p><em># Irie Shoichi<em>

Now I don't know about other towns, but Namimori's a pretty quiet town. Well, it's meant to be. The only things that caused explosions were a) the Sawada household or b) Gokudera. And since I was partially connected to both, I was partially responsible for the aftermath.

As soon as the explosion went off, I found a bicycle in my garage and pedalled halfway across town. And...it'd been so long since I'd been on a bicycle, I'd forgotten how the brake system operated. CRASH. "Oh damn, for the love of God, tell me it's not Lambo..." I murmured, dismounting. A boy with red hair was lying on the pavement. _...Whoops._

"Argh!" he cried out, sitting up suddenly. "Did you see this mega-huge face just then?"

"Um...no? Are you okay?" I asked. "I mean, physically, that is."

He tried to stand up. "Yeah, I'm – itai!" And...he fell down. So, I ran over his foot. Fair enough.

"Where you headed? I'll give you a lift," I offered, feeling increasingly sympathetic.

"Ah ha, there's no need," he said nervously, trying get up again. Trying - aka, failing. Sighing, I got him to sit on the bike, and I pushed the handlebars from beside him.

"So, uh, what school do you go to?" I asked, trying to go around awkward silences.

"Yumei Private Middle School. It's uh...pretty nice place," he replied with a gentle shrug. "Thanks for...helping. My name's Irie. Irie Shoichi."

_Irie Shoichi! That guy! What the fuck have I gotten myself into now...? _"My name's Serena. I go to Namimori Middle. It's...cheap." Come on, what else was I meant to say? Irie was probably one of those super rich and smart guys, in a rich private school with really smart people.

"So uh, what's your favorite subject?" he asked, obviously getting the whole gist of the 'I'm probably richer than you' thought.

"Don't really have one. You?"

"Well...I like music. I play the guitar."

"Nice. I play the piano. Got any bands you like?"

"Ah...you've probably never heard of them though."

"I like Fall Out Boy."

"What? No way! I love their new album!"

To be honest, Shoichi was actually a really cool guy to talk to. I mean...he got stuff. Talk to him about system clocks, elements or chromosomes, and he actually understood the words coming out of my mouth.

"You know Serena, you could apply for a scholarship to any school you wanted," he asserted when we arrived at his place. "I dunno, you should aim higher."

I shook my head. "I've got the cash; I like being a commoner. So...yeah."

He blushed. "Sorry. You uh... don't have to call me Irie. You can call me Shoichi, if you want," he blushed. "Well um..."

"Ah, I almost forgot. Is this box yours?" I remembered, handing over a wooden crate with the Bovino family's logo. "It was on the floor next to you."

Shoichi's face seemed to lose a few shades of color. "That...uh...um...thanks..." Waving, I turned to leave. "Wait! Can we...hang out sometime?" he asked, embarrassed, looking at his feet. "I mean, do you want to be pen pals?"

_Pen-pals? In this day an age? _I shrugged. "Sure."

* * *

><p>"Yumei Private Middle School?" I asked, eating another mouthful of ice cream. "Is it nice?" <em>Ha, I just heard twenty minutes of talk about it from Shoichi. Course it's nice. You guys have plush carpet and air-conditioning.<em>

Terry Luck glared. "Don't bother looking surprised, Serena. You've been stalking me, haven't you?"

"You? God no. Who'd want to stalk you?" I shrugged. "This is all news to me."

"You're a crappy liar. Hasn't anyone ever told you?"

I was. And plenty of people told me that. It was nice to see Terry wasn't as thick-headed as myself. "So, it's been like two months since you got here. Made any friends?"

Another glare. "Of course not. I can't attract too much attention to myself. Unlike _someone_."

Casually eating another spoonful, I smiled. "Oh, heard of me now, have you?"

"Your work is plastered on the national newspaper at least once a week," she accused, flipping her hair behind her shoulder. "Do you have to draw so much attention to yourself?"

"Attention is good. People in the mafia will stay away from Namimori because of me. If anyone tries to screw with me, I'll screw them over threefold. This is officially Vongola territory, after all."

"Then wouldn't that just be a magnet to guys who want to kill you?"

"Kill me? Are you kidding? Everybody loves me."

She rolled her eyes.

Ah, friendship. It makes you feel all...warm and fuzzy inside. Warm with annoyance and fuzzy with anger.

* * *

><p><em>Sometime later that week...<em>

"Congrats Baka-Tsuna, I can't believe you passed the chemistry test," I muttered, shuffling beside a slightly beaten-up Tsuna.

"Aha...thank you for helping me after school," he smiled tentatively back.

The only reason I was escorting Tsuna home, was because Gokudera was restocking on dynamite, and he was paranoid that something might happen to his precious 'juudaime'. And if Iemitsu asked - I was being a 'tool'. As we turned around the corner, Tsuna stopped so suddenly that I paraded right into the wall. There was a sea of...black suits. He clutched my arm tightly. "Serena...run."

"Welcome home, Master Tsunayoshi!" the sea boomed, forming into two lines. Forgetting about me, he HIE!'d and ran inside. _Nope, I'm not offended at all._

With a grin, I sighed. "Well well well, what brings the Cavallone family to Japan?"

"We're visiting," one of them laughed. "Didn't Boss tell you?"

No. He did _not_. Suppressing a complaint, I shook my head. _Argue later. Deal with the current issue._ "He's in there, right?" I asked, pointing at Tsuna's house.

"Yeah. We couldn't find your address, so he went looking for Reborn."

Nodding, I hopped onto the Sawada's fence/wall and jumped onto Tsuna's balcony. Dino was standing all intimidating like over Tsuna, saying some crap about aura, daring looks or anticipation. Reborn continued on about power, money and short legs. Quietly, I slid open the window and stepped inside.

"He looks unlucky too," Dino commented. "He has zero talent as a boss."

"Well then, aren't you one to talk, Cavallone." Heads turned.

"S-Sere - "

Before he finished stuttering my name, I leapt on top of him and pushed him face first onto the floor. "DINO CAVALLONE. HOW DARE YOU COME TO JAPAN WITHOUT INFORMING YOUR EXTERNAL ADVISOR? AND HOW DARE YOU LAUGH AT A STRANGER AS PITIFUL AS YOURSELF? SHAME ON YOU, SHAME ON YOUR FAMILY DISINCLUDING ME, AND SHAME ON EVERY FRIEND OTHER THAN ME YOU HAVE!"

"I-I told you I was coming when you called me...last week..." he answered weakly, voice muffled by the carpet.

"My mobile is now in the Pacific Ocean," I informed. "Tell me twice."

"But you always complain 'you don't need to tell me twice'..."

We both turned to Tsuna, who was clearly having a hard time comprehending.

_Now...how should I explain this? _"Tsuna, this is Dino Cavallone – Reborn's senior pupil - Dino, this is the Vongola kid. By mafia family structure, you guys are practically bros."

Tsuna's face seemed stuck on one expression. WAT DA FAQ?

I slapped my forehead. "All right. I'll admit it. I'm...aha...ha...well, I'm actually an assassin; part of the Vongola Alliance families, you know?"

HUH?

Perfectly at that moment, Lambo ran in, chasing I-Pin. "The broccoli monster is scary!" Lambo snickered crazily, tripped on my foot (I swear, accident), and two grenades with their pins pulled were released.

"Baka!" Tsuna yelled frantically, watching the objects sail gracefully in the air – toward the window that I forgot to close. Oh well.

"Subordinates..." I reminded Dino. He reacted instantly, pushing off the ledge and pulling out his whip.

"You guys! Get down!"

*explosions*

I stood by the window and stared at Dino's embarrassed grin. Despite everything, it really was great to see him again. "Do you understand?" Reborn was saying. "A boss is someone who puts his life on the line for his subordinates."

"And don't worry about dying; they'll be happy to see you tried," I added helpfully, putting a hand on Tsuna's shoulder. He flinched a little, as always. "Well, I'm off. Text if something happens!"

* * *

><p>"Tch. Why the hell do you keep looking at that photo?" Gokudera muttered. "Is it your boyfriend or something?"<p>

"No!" I retorted quickly, showing him the picture in my wallet of Dino, Squalo and me when the three of us were close. "Childhood friends. That's all. One of them's visiting me."

"Guy with the white hair looks like you."

"He's actually my brother...but he has long hair now. Rebel stage," I considered.

"Rebel stage? From this picture...he's gotta be what – in his twenties? Wait. I have another cousin, and you never told me?!"

Sniffing indignantly, I took focused more on my food. "Well, when I met you, we kinda had a restraining order. Not to mention he'd murder you like a puppy whenever convenient."

Gokudera stared, but shrugged it off, eating another piece of hamburger steak. "Who's the other guy?"

"Ah, nobody really. We're still friends. He's the boss of the Cavallone family now."

He nodded, and was about to swallow when he stopped, and looked at me incredulously. "THE Cavallone family?"

"How many Cavallone families do you know?"

"You know _the_ boss of _the_ CAVALLONE FAMILY? What the hell – _nobody_?"

"I'm the External Advisor of the Cavallone family. What d'you think?" I remarked. "Next time: chew, swallow, _then_ have a moment of truth."

"YOU'RE WHAT?"

"He's in town at the moment. _H__uge _tattoo on his left arm, six pack, accident-prone, and pretty cool."

"...So he _is _your boyfriend?"

I sighed. "Can't I honestly comment my opinion of a boy without making it sound like I wanna sleep with him? You, Gokudera, are also actually quite a fine young - "

"DON'T."

"Fine." I snapped shut my wallet and shoved it back into my pocket. My phone beeped – Tsuna. I knew something would happen. I texted something back. "Now, let's have dessert before I go. What do you want?"

* * *

><p>"Serena, I already said I'm sorry."<p>

"Sorry doesn't cut it Dino!" Leave it to Dino to give me a black eye.

"Come on, you only have to wear an eye patch for...a week, right?"

I slammed open the bathroom door. "If I can't use my right eye, I don't have any _balance_. My left eye is just...off angle. I can't go up and down stairs, I can't walk in a straight line, and I can't even run without falling down!" _I have a schedule to conquer Japan, you...you...mutt!_

"Um...Serena, I'm standing here. You're talking to your cat..."

"Ha! There! You see!"

"Um...you're talking to a house plant now..."

"ARGH. DO YOU SEE WHAT YOU'VE DONE?"

Because of that, Dino insisted that he'd take me to school every day until my eye healed. So for five days, I endured stares as I was helped out of a Ferrari (blasting Justin Bieber) by a hot blond guy. And then the hot blond guy would ruffle my hair and give me a hug, pretend to cry (as if it was my first day of kindergarten or something), and then drive away beeping the car horn as loudly as possible.

*Facepalm*.

* * *

><p>When the weekend finally showed up...<p>

Hibari never came. I mean, I promised one really legit fight that I would purposely give up on AND he doesn't damn come. Besides that, he me standing alone on the school grounds, freezing my ass off on the coldest, rainiest day of the decade.

Walking back to my living quarters, I gave up on battling my umbrella through the strong winds, and watched it fly away. _It's a free, cold shower. Who wouldn't want one?_ Cursing out loud, I ran into the alley, and tripped. Dang. Who was stupid enough to leave a dead body in an alley? People are bound to trip over it. It's a general mafia courtesy to cut it up and dump it appropriately. Geez, no manners at all these days.

Giving a heart felt kick, the body moved. Oh, my bad. Who was stupid enough to lie down in a dirty alley and take a nap?! Looking closely at the person, I suddenly realized why Hibari Kyoya never turned up. "You can't sleep here, you'll disturb the peace!"

The wind blew. The rain fell. And Hibari Kyoya was still unconscious.

I gave up, stood up and turned to leave. Let the world witness I tried. I'd already walked halfway down the street when I just stopped.

_I can't leave him there._

Oh yes you can Serena. Hurry up and go. It's cold. It's wet.

_He needs help. Seriously. He might even die._

Don't care?! Gift from God here, peoples. This is the guy that attacks you relentlessly, remember?

_You know the right thing to do._

You're right; I do - I'm going now.

But my uncertainties grew with every step, until I found myself marching back to Hibari, lying pitifully in the alley. There was no way an ambulance would get here in this weather. But he was too heavy to carry...

So that's how I found myself pushing Hibari in a shopping trolley, as people stuck in stores and restaurants stared, and a few even snapped pictures. _If that ends up being public, I'm a dead man walking. No wait, dead girl walking. Heck, it doesn't have the same ring to it..._

* * *

><p><em>Two days later...<em>

"I'm at the hospital. Why do you ask, Romario?" I yawned. Crossing my legs in the chair, I looked at Hibari, who was reading and ignoring me.

"_Me and the other guys are on vacation. But Boss hasn't given called us yet."_

_Dino. I'm tired. _*sigh* "I'll go get him. Where is he?"

"_Namimori Mountains. Something about a training schedule for the Vongola Tenth. You're closer at the moment, so..."_

"Kay. I'm borrowing a helicopter."

Hibari clearly heard out whole conversation, though he didn't look up from his 'oh so entertaining' novel. Hanging up, I put a warm container on his bedside table.

"Yo. I have mafia business. Get better. Eat the damn food I made, coz I ain't taking another complaint from the hospital chef about a patient who has a violent attitude towards vegetables and jello. And frankly, I don't want any more paperwork."

* * *

><p><em>Many hours later...<em>

I gently stepped over an unconscious patient laying on the floor, and sat quietly beside a dozing Hibari. If he heard me, he probably ignored me. Taking out a knife, I saw his eye flicker open. "Chill. I'm peeling an apple."

"I don't want an apple."

"Who said it was for you? I'm hungry, you dimwit." Taking note of my now empty container, I stretched and stood up. "Well, hurry up and rest, so I don't have to cover for your Disciplinary Committee duties. Personally, I'd like my pyjamas back too."

*tonfa*

"Tonfas? You seriously couldn't choose something else to sleep with? Like a teddy bear? Another pillow? Maybe some chick? Later."

Taking the stairs, I found Tsuna's room – he was sharing with a few idiots. They said something about juice and threw his crutches to him. As I entered, he looked to me as if I was his saviour. "Ah! Serena...y-you're here..."

"Don't worry, I'm leaving immediately."

"Hey, such a pretty face would be wasted with that guy. Why don't you let him buy us some juice? I could show you a few moves I know you'd like..." the guy with a broken arm urged, coming face to face with me. I pretended to consider. And then broke his other arm.

"Serena! I come to visit Tsuna, and I see you here making more trouble!" Dino chided walking into the room with his army of subordinates.

*Other patients start shaking...*

"He didn't brush his teeth."

"That's not a legitimate excuse!" he shot back, mildly amused nonetheless. "Anyways, Tsuna. You should be more careful. A hospital is the easiest target for a boss to be taken out. Do you one on you Serena?"

*Other patients are confused...*

"Do you think I would carry one to a _hospital_?" I huffed, folding my arms. "Good guess. But I need it."

"Okay. Tsuna, take my trusty gun," Dino advised, taking one out of his pocket and handing it over to Tsuna.

*Other patients run out of room screaming...*

* * *

><p># <em>Fuuta<em>

I fidgeted with my pen, eyes darting back and forth between the teacher and the window. How could I not? When Ranking Fuuta is right underneath your classroom window, it's kinda hard not to be stressed. "Knight-san, care to share the entertainment?" the teacher questioned with a sigh.

With a swift movement, I pulled down the blinds. "Nothing. I was just blinded by sunlight. Actually, I'm not feeling very well. May I be excused?"

Luckily, I found Fuuta before some people (who clearly regularly took steroids) in pinstripe suits caught up to him. I put a hand over his mouth and dragged him into the girl's bathroom, waiting until the three men passed. "You're Ranking Fuuta right?" I whispered, listening to their loud steps.

He nodded slowly. "You're Serena, right? From the Varia, Cavallone family and CEDEF?"

"Ya. What're you here for?"

"I can't rank you."

"Uh huh, that's lovely. Why don't we get you to a safer place?" I muttered, peeking my head round the door. "Wait. You can't rank me?"

"The ranking star doesn't recognize you...so...I don't know if I can trust you," he hesitated, eyeing me cautiously. "Though you are good friends with Dino and Tsuna-nii...but then again, you work with the Varia as well..."

"So...you don't trust me." I laid out simply. "Sure. That's cool. Well, go to uh...Tsuna-nii's house then, kay? He's a nice guy, as the star has...spoken."

As we arrived at the school gate, I saw a guy in a Kokuyu uniform casually walking by (during school hours, too); white beanie, lanky, glasses and a barcode thing on his cheek. I wanted to scan his face and see how much money he was worth - but resisting the temptation, I pushed Fuuta into a bush before the guy could look in my direction.

Heck. That _was_ Chikusa. And where there was Chikusa, meant there was Ken. And Mukuro.

_Ah, Fuuta must hate me._

* * *

><p>I hate Valentines Day. It's so...pointless.<p>

But, despite my utter hatred, I found myself holding out a box to none other, than Hibari Kyoya. "Happy Valentine's Day." He ignored me and continued sunbathing on the roof. Meh. Opening the box, I threw the cell phone at him, and he caught it just before it hit his face.

"I don't need this." Without warning, he threw it off the roof.

"..." Well, can't say I wasn't expecting that. Pulling out an identical device out of my pocket, I threw it at him again. "The ringtone's the school anthem. And it was Kusakube's idea," I grumbled. Upon hearing that, he pocketed the phone – all the while with his eyes shut. "You know, if a girl offers you a Valentine's Day gift, you should accept it. With that attitude, you won't end up getting much."

In a flash, his tonfas were out. "Don't pity me, herbivore."

"You're too...pity-able."

"I'll bite you to death."

A shame. I'd sworn we'd gotten over that stage already.

* * *

><p><strong>You got time? I could use a spare hand.<strong>

I glanced at the text message. It was rare for Terry Luck to initiate communication with me.

**No. I'm patrolling for the Disciplinary Committee. What is it?**

"Atchoo!"

Turning to the other Disciplinary Committee member, I frowned. "Ichiro, you're bloody sick. Go home – I got this shift covered."

"No way! Iinchou will kill me if I ditch!"

Iinchou this, Iinchou that. Hibari was such a dominant guy. Hn. Whatever. Nothing ever happened while I was on duty any way - Dino picked up before the first ring ended. _"Yo, I'm sorry, something urgent, went back to Italy...ha ha..."_

"21st century, and not even a text?"

_"If I make you laugh, I'm forgiven."_

"Try me."

_"Cripple jokes are terrible. I just can't stand them." _

"That was so...lame," I shot back, figuring he wasn't trying to be offensive. "Blind jokes are just as bad – I just don't _see_ the humor in them."

It took a moment for him to respond. _"I don't mind blind jokes, 'cause black jokes are even worse. They're just so...dark."_

"I don't mind black jokes, but 9/11 jokes are just plane wrong," I smirked. The other guy from the Disciplinary Committee wasn't Italian, so he figured I was on crack or something. _  
><em>

_"9/11 jokes are okay, but jew need to stop with these death jokes."_

Keeping my face straight was beginning to take more and more determination. "Well, Nazi jokes just aren't funny, Ann frankly, I'm quite offended."

_"I wanted to tell a story about the bank,"_ he started with a sigh, _"but I lost interest. And yes, I take credit for that joke."_

Bursting into laughter, I figured it was best to admit my defeat. "All right, you're forgiven. Go do that paperwork."

He laughed nervously. _"Yes, well, I left a stack for you with Kyoya."_

"...You're not forgiven." Hanging up, I yawned, stretching.

The dude coughed awkwardly - actually, he was ill. "Kyoya?"

"...It's three in the morning. I need caffiene. Coffee, sugar?"

"Yeah, thanks."

Crossing the road, and making a left, I strolled into a 24/7 convenience store. Waiting for the machine to warm up, I imagined wistfully sleeping for two days straight. And then I remembered I had plans to destroy multiple families in Kyoto.

"Hey kid – you're coffee's done. That'll be three hundred yen."

"Oh?" I handed over a 10 000 yen note. "Keep the change." Taking the two cups, I left the store as two guys entered. Thinking back – I wondered if I should've put in the effort to look at their faces. Though it wasn't like it would've accomplished anything.

I heard someone groaning when I walked back to where Ichiro was waiting – to find him lying on the floor, a bloody mess. "Hey! Dude! What happened?" I asked, dropping the coffee and snapping my fingers in front of his face. "Yo!"

"Fey got ma thief..." he managed to say before completely passing out. _...Teeth, right, I get it. _

* * *

><p>When sunrise came, I was half-asleep waiting hospital when the emergency door flapped open – and another Namimori Middle Disciplinary Committee member was pushed through. He too was missing many teeth. <em>Maybe it's a teeth fetish thing? <em>Rubbing my strained eyes, I wondered how much longer I should stay.

"Quick! People, we're losing her!"

My eyes snapped open. And my heart skipped a beat. Now, why on earth was Terry Luck bleeding all over the place? Mingling with the scramble of nurses and doctors, I examined the wound quickly.

"Hey! Get back!" a nurse yelled, pushing me away.

I sat back down in my chair. Hard. Judging by the bleeding...it'd be left to fate. Iemitsu was not going to be pleased. I was about to go into a hardcore tetris depression gaming session when I noticed I had gotten a text back from Terry.

**Found some prison escapees. Gonna check it out.**

"That idiot..."

Now, Rokudo Mukuro. You've just made this a hell lot more personal.

* * *

><p><strong>The Kokuyu Arc. Finally D:<strong>

**UniCryin - agelessness doesn't mean she's immortal, it just means her appearance won't look any different when she does die (personally, I'm thinking about a car accident).**

**As for the whole Terry Luck thing...I got a PM saying that Serena was too 'harem', which I figured was a relatively legit complaint.**

**Have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	21. Allergy to Pineapples

Chapter 21 - Allergy to Pineapples

There was something...off with my nightmare. You see, generally, oddly shaped things tried to chase/kill/annihilate me, and I'd wake up in cold sweat. This time...it was more of a memory.

_"Ku fu fu fu...some assassin you are," _a younger version of Mukuro laughed casually, standing in a room drenched in blood_. "You'll come to regret the weakness in your heart someday."_

My younger self looked grim. _  
><em>

And _then _I woke up in cold sweat. Because that 'someday', was today.

* * *

><p>Let's skip some time. Ryohei got attacked. <em>Tick.<em>

I found Kokuyu Land on Google Images and told Hibari. _Tick._

Tsuna found out that Fuuta wasn't actually on a holiday to Antarctica, but kidnapped. _Tick. _

We went to Namimori Middle to find Gokudera, and in an act of impatience, accidentally pulled out a gun on Tsuna's teacher. _Tick. _

Gokudera was attacked. _Tick._

But of course, perfection was unobtainable. Shamal was never introduced into Tsuna's life. I had an invitation for a very...deep talk with Rokudo Mukuro. And...Terry Luck was apparently the Ninth's sister's husband's niece.

* * *

><p>"Serena, will Gokudera be okay?" Tsuna asked nervously as I fiddled around the Namimori Middle's Infirmary.<p>

"I found the antidote for the poison but...it wasn't a gentle injury," I admitted. "But no worries. I have a shortcut." Finding a needle, I reached into my school bag and took out a small bottle.

"Um...that is safe, right?" he muttered, taking a step back.

"Of course! It's just drug boost," I rebutted.

"Huh?"

"A modified combination of ecstasy and cocaine," I waved off. "It'll last for a day, so I suppose he should choose when to use it. As soon as it wears off, Gokudera will feel like hell though..."

Tsuna looked terrified. "A-Aren't those drugs illegal...?"

*Blank stare*. "Who gives? Now Tsuna, you can watch him. I have business to do."

* * *

><p>"Hi, I'm calling about the patient in room 108? Terry Luck?" I asked politely over the phone. Terry's life was the Varia's life. It was crucial to know.<p>

Besides - standing at the front entrance to Kokuyu Land made me find the need to procrastinate. I mean...it's not like I wanted to see Mukuro. Or Ken. Or Chikusa. Since I'd been more or less responsible for their hatred for the mafia.

"One moment please." The voice at the other end of the phone changed. "Hello. What is your relation the patient?"

"I'm a friend. How is she?"

"She's badly injured, but she's just holding on for the moment. Does she have any relativ - "

"Nope," I said quickly, breathing a sigh of relief. I smelt something, so I quickly thanked the person on the other end of the line and hung up. Drawing a pistol, I pointed it at Ken's face. "Sneaking up on people isn't nice."

Ken laughed. "Mukuro-san was right. You'd be stupid enough to come here alone!"

"Um, do you not see my acquaintance between your eyes?" I tried to point out. Mafia. Ex-mafia. Either way, guns are like fluffy bunnies. "Where's Mukuro?"

Following Ken up a flight of stairs, I found myself in a shady room. I mean, how hard is it to pull back the curtains and air out a room these days? "Ku fu fu fu...so we meet again, assassin."

Ken left the room laughing. "You wanted to talk?" I called out suspiciously, handgun aiming for Mukuro's chest. His heterochromic eyes reminded me of my cat, so the whole evil guy thought sort of faded.

"Hm...why don't you put down that gun? I'd hate to see you get hurt," he said, as if he actually did care.

"I'd love to see myself get hurt. Ohayo. Ciao. Talk."

"I should thank you," he mused, putting the tips of his perfectly manicured fingers together. "After all, it's all thanks to you that I found a hit, after all."

_Thanks to me...? _Alright. Fine. Be the un-explanatory antagonist. Sitting down on the floor, I crossed my legs. "So, then Mukuro. I'm in the mood for some entertainment. Let's play 21 questions, shall we?"

His eyes narrowed, but his mood didn't seem to change. "Sounds fun, assassin. I'll go first then, hm? Who is the Vongola Tenth?"

"Sawada Tsunayoshi," I answered without hesitation. He was bound to find out sooner or later. "My turn. Why did you target Namimori Middle? The world's a big place. Lots of weak people to take advantage of."

"Ku fu fu fu...is the Vongola family not the most influential mafia family of the time? As for why I targeted Namimori Middle...I thought I'd already answered that. Do you not see the uniform you're wearing? I know you're the Vongola family assassin behind the attacks all over Japan. The Vongola brat can't be too far from you, so I suspected he'd be in the same school," Mukuro informed casually.

"Fair point." _So Iemitsu. Mukuro finding Tsuna and pulling teeth from a bunch of people is actually YOUR fault._

"Who is in the Vongola Tenth's family?"

"Uh...let's see. Currently? Gokudera, Yamamoto, Ryohei...and then Tsuna's tutor. There's a bunch of unrelated friends and blood family too. Satisfied?" He shrugged. "Alrighty," I muttered, clapping my hands together. "Why did you infiltrate Kokuyu Junior, when Namimori Middle was clearly a better choice?"

"The uniform was so...dull," Mukuro answered distastefully.

I burst into laughter. _YOU'RE KIDDING. School uniform? That's so...sad!_

"Is something the matter?" he questioned, only slightly irritated.

"It's nothing," I sniffed, wiping away a fake tear. "It's your turn to ask."

"Who is his tutor?"

"Reborn, appearance of a baby, really and Arcobaleno," I ticked off my fingers. Taking a moment to prioritize my questions, I figured this was an excellent opportunity to find out about my universe. _That's right, how does this nut beat Hibari...if Shamal's not here to infect him with that sakura virus? _"You know that guy who you probably just finished beating up – "

"The skylark?"

"Yeah him. I'm not saying you're weak or anything, but how the fuck are you stronger than him?" Sitting up a little straighter, I waited tentatively for his reply.

"Ku fu fu fu...that's quite unfortunate for him, really. Anaphylaxis. Severe allergy to pineapples. He wasn't - "

Damn, it was too much. "AHA HA HA HA!"

Mukuro paused. "I'm sorry?"

"Allergic to pineapples," I wheezed. "All this time, and all I had to do was offer him some fruit punch? Un-fucking believable!"

"I'll continue then," he stated flatly. "What's Sawada Tsunayoshi's greatest fear?"

"Fear?"

"Weaknesses. What he dreads. What he is willing to risk his life for," Mukuro listed almost impatiently.

"Ah...well, he values his friends and family dearly. He dreads...pretty much you'd expect a teenage girl to scream at," I described. "Now, serious question. Why did you attack Terry Luck?"

"The girl that broke in a few days ago?" he remembered. "She was wasting my time. Hand me over to authorities? Pfft, as if. Now, what do you know of the future?"

Tensing, I pursed my lips. "I know one _possibility_ of the future. And it don't look to bright for you," I shrugged.

"Ku fu fu fu...as expected, Serena di Squalo. You are not from this world, am I correct?"

"If that counts as a question, then yeah. Not completely. But you are, right?"

His eyes flared, and for a moment, he looked genuinely pissed. "I have lived through all six realms. For your information, I have lived outside this world."

"Oh yeah, the reincarnation thing..." I muttered. "You know, I thought about that once. When we first met, you had this sort of a...scar thing around your red eye, so I always thought that you were just programmed like that." I stopped, and tried to rephrase it nicer. "I'm not saying that you're a computer; I'm just saying that you're 'past lives' could've just been implanted into your mind."

"Do you wish to see hell?" His voice was deathly silent. "Then perha - "

"No, not really. My question now," I interrupted, waving my hand for him to stop. "Did you purposely style your hair to look like a pineapple? No wait, that's trivial. So, why're you wearing earrings? Oh hang on – huh. OH. I get it. Just saying - I completely support homosexuality."

He charged.

_Did I say something? "Oh, boo, I thought we were playing a game," _I muttered_._ AsI was about to shoot a vital spot, I recalled at the last moment he had to be _alive _when Tsuna showed up. Allowing him to whack the firearm out of my hands, I jumped back, reaching into my bag, pulling out...an umbrella.

Mukuro stopped in his tracks, and stared. "I'm offended," he finally said, stopping his advance as I threw the umbrella aside. "To think you were a fool."

"Surprise?" I laughed gently. "My bad – I was just prepared for wet weather. Ah, here we go." I extended my walking stick.

The corner of his mouth twitched. "And I take, that this is your weapon?"

"What? It's a weapon too," I argued nonchalantly.

He shook his head, seemingly disgusted and charged. Using the walking stick to catch his trident, I pushed it to one side and dodged a quick jab. I delivered a kick of my own, and we broke away.

"Say, Mukuro. I dislike fighting with weapons. How's your hand to hand combat?"

"Pfft. Simply because my weapon is superior to yours, I have no inclination to pity you!"

Our weapons clashed, and I twisted his trident from his hands, flinging it to the side of the room. "Sharper, yes. Superior? Maybe in dignity." Compressing my walking stick, I pocketed it. "Look, I didn't come to - "

WHAM. Staying on my two feet, I grimaced. Ouch. Fine. Be like that. Kick me when I'm trying to talk nicely. Running forward, I jumped for a spinning kick, but something rammed into my leg, and I was dragged for a few feet before my leg was released. Were those..._bite_ marks?!

"You're blood is tasty, byon," Ken announced, in whatever animal mode he was in.

"Oh, don't worry about me, I've had a tetanus shot," I chatted to myself, trying to find a nice spot to stand. "Not that it had any effect."

"Ku fu fu fu...and still, you make jokes, assassin," Mukuro remarked, walking slowly towards me.

"How else can I keep a positive attitude towards life?" I grunted. "You should try it some time. Does wonders."

Ken changed into some sort of a unicorn (all right, rhino) mode and ran head first at me. Making a split second decision, I used his head as a vaulting horse to cartwheel over him, though I overshot the landing and crashed into something.

The thing made a soft noise, and I realized that it was just a thoroughly beaten up Hibari. On the other side of the room, Mukuro picked up his trident, bouncing it in his hand – as if he was about to throw it like a javelin. Glancing around the room, I noticed another bloody figure – Chikusa. "I call a truce!" I declared suddenly.

"Oh? I have no need for a truce," Mukuro scoffed, throwing the trident. Sidestepping, it impaled itself into the wall.

"You may not, but I think your buddy – the barcode guy – might need a little medical attention. I'll patch him up if you let me patch up this guy," I reasoned, pointing at Hibari.

There was a long pause. "Deal."

* * *

><p>Somehow, when I called a truce, I didn't image myself in a pitch black room with four walls and no windows. Oh. I also didn't imagine myself to be with the one person that was allergic to...pineapples.<p>

I dug further into my backpack, and took out a flashlight. "So, Hibari. How's life?"

"Stay away from me, herbivore."

"I have Band-Aids."

He gave me a hard shove. "Touch me herbivore, and I'll - "

"You know, Hibari," I sighed, leaning on a wall, "that if you call me a herbivore, you imply that you're a carnivore right? Well, carnivores need herbivores to survive. Every single animal documentary - "

Hibari lifted a tonfa. "Shut up."

"I have a whole speech here! But that'll have to wait. Argh! Look!" I gasped, pointing in some random direction. Although it was pretty darn obvious there wasn't anything in that direction, Hibari turned, and I hit a pressure point on his neck, rendering him unconscious.

"You know, when I first took the medical course at Mafia High, I practised on dead bodies. Isn't this just so much easier?"

* * *

><p>Hibari Kyoya had one level of extreme anger. And three levels above that, described Hibari's current mood.<p>

Waking up to the awful sound of someone singing the Namimori Middle school song just about topped it off. Not one note was on key. Not one syllable was pronounced acceptably.

"Ah, you're awake," the herbivore noticed, flicking on the torch. "You hungry? I've got a bento." And yet again, Hibari was stuck wondering. Who came to an enemy's lair with...with umbrellas and bentos? "I disinfected your wounds. Couldn't do much about the fractures. Stitched up your shoulder. I figure you still need a very nice conversation with the pineapple guy, so your movement's not too restricted."

Casually, she went on singing. Failing, to sing.

"Shut up."

"Aw, Hibari, that's not nice," she chided as if he were four years old. "It's just a canary. Isn't it cute?" The yellow bird jumped on his head, and started singing. How it did that in tune, he had no idea.

"Where did it come from?" he found himself saying.

"Ah, it's too dark to see, but there's a crack up on that wall for air or something. I accidentally threw your tonfas out there," she said apologetically, but Hibari wasn't interested. His anger had already reached its limits.

"The time."

She looked confused for a moment. "Ah, right. It's almost midday. I assume they'll use me as a hostage soon, so...take this." She gently threw him a fat tube. "It's an epipen," she stated, as if that explained everything. "You know how you can't really breathe when you see pineapples? This solves the problem. Only lasts half an hour. Take off the lid, stab it into your thigh for ten seconds."

"And why should I trust you?" he glared, thinking about the many different ways he could kill her at this distance.

"Coz...you don't have a choice? No wait, you do. We're on the same committee? AND, I actually _really _hate pineapples. There." Facing the bird, she coughed. "Now, say Hibari. Hi-ba-ri."

"Hibari! Hibari!" it chirped. Annoyed, he shooed the bird away, and it flew through the gap in the wall.

"Reminds me of you," she sighed wistfully.

Oh that was it. Now she was just _asking _for an injury. As if on cue, the door rattled, and swung open.

"What do you want?" I called out the dark figure. The light in the background stung my eyes, so I couldn't really make out who it was. But shit, they were _tall_. How did he even make it through the door?!

I came to a decision. As the figure loomed closer, I stepped on their knee, and struck a kick at their chin - only to have my wrist seized. _Seriously? They didn't feel that...at all? Geez, I'm offended. _Their grip was like _super glue_. Not matter how hard I tried, I couldn't shake him off. Before I could try anything else, Hibari charged forward, but was kicked across the room. I mentally facepalmed at the thought of my medical assistance going to waste. As I struggled, my forehead was smashed into the wall. _Great. Now I feel don't have to imagine the pain; I can feel it. And I don't need to mentally facepalm either._

Without saying a single word, I was slung over the figure's shoulder as she left the room, and locked the door.

My head was bleeding. With all that blood to my head - at least I could note the man's features. Spiky black hair. Two markings on one cheek. Insane height and strength. _Ah, I see._ "So, Lancia, strongest man in Northern Italy. Very fitting title," I murmured, letting my eyes tear up. Wearing contacts overnight had left my eyes pretty dry, after all.

"Be quiet."

"Why?"

SMASH.

Body. Wall. Pain. Had I learnt my lesson? Nope. "You know Lancia, you'll end up alone with that attitude."

SMASH.

"And...you won't have any children..."

SMASH.

*wheeze* "My Dad once said: a man without children, is a man without - "

SMASH.

Barely conscious, the next few phrases didn't just go in one ear and out the other - they almost missed.

"Rokudo Mukuro-sama..."

"So you've awakened, Chikusa. Hunting number 3 was hard work," Mukuro's unnaturally smooth voice droned. "Our reinforcements have arrived." Lancia entered the room and dumped me on the floor.

"Oh, Serena! It's so good to see you!" _Ah? This voice...it's so nostalgic... _"Geez, Lancia, she was already fragile..."

I lazily wiped some blood out of my eyes. "M.M.? What are you doing here?"

"To work of course! Mukuro-chan pays the best!" she grinned, as if we weren't on opposite sides – but instead on a playground as kids.

"You should get plenty of rest, Chikusa. Let's leave the Vongola to them. Ku fu fu fu...as for...our guest, Lancia, why don't you tie her up?"

Pretending to be worried, I sat up and backed slowly towards the window. "Please...please don't...hurt me...JOKES." Turning, I sprang upward and crashed through the window, landing painfully from the high fall.

Without looking back, I ran into a woody area ahead, and climbed up a random tree.

Nausea. Get smashed into a wall a few times, and that's what you feel like. Catching my breath, I pulled out small fragments of glass from my arms. Underneath, Fuuta ran past. Damn, Fuuta was on Mukuro's side.

"Fuuta!"

And yet...that was Tsuna's voice. Climbing back to ground, I was about to reveal myself when a hand clamped onto my mouth and another twisted my arm.

"Fuuta?" Tsuna questioned, looking around. Beside me, Mukuro walked into view, innocent expression on his face. "A Kokuyu student!"

"You must have come to save us," he started.

Chikusa held a needle beside my neck. "You won't receive the antidote before your carotid artery bleeds out." The conversation between Mukuro and Tsuna came to an end, and the latter ran off.

"Oya oya, how troublesome," Mukuro mused, his eyes flaring at my 'FML' face.

"I'm home honey~."

* * *

><p>Sitting beside his chair, I found a nice sharp object behind my back. Cable ties. They've got to be one of the most annoying creations of all time. Shit," I cursed under my breath as I used too much force and stabbed myself. Giving up, I just stabbed myself over and over in frustration.<p>

"You should be a good girl and sit still," Mukuro taunted, staring at the door opposite from us. "Do you realize what you're doing?" Curious, I looked behind my shoulder. And paled. Didn't Mukuro have the ability to possess things stabbed with his trident...? _This_ trident...? The trident that I'd just so happened to casually stab myself with multiple times...?

Fuck it. It's not a big deal.

On more important matters, there _is _something I have to commemorate Mukuro for. No, not his extravagant hairstyle. And no, not his naturally evil nature.

His patience.

Rokudo Mukuro, was actually screwed to wait _patiently_ for Tsuna to arrive. Unbelievable. I didn't last ten minutes before falling asleep. Next thing I knew...I was dreaming.

"Ah, Tsuna, help me," Mukuro's voice commanded in my mind.

I flinched. It felt like he was standing right behind me, breathing down my neck. Of course he wasn't, but the feeling wasn't all that great. For some strange reason, I imagined the chicken dance song in my head.

"I don't get this," he continued. "This usually works..."

"M-Mukuro," I stuttered, regaining some composure. The song in my mind changed to some other song. "What business do you have?"

"Oh, assassin. I'm possessing your - "

"Having trouble?" I guessed as my dream faded. "Sucks to be you then."

He muttered something darkly, and seemed to disappear.

Tsuna's POV:

"HIIIEE! Four Mukuros!" Tsuna panicked, his eyes flickering back and forth from Gokudera, Bianchi, Ken and Chikusa.

"Possessing four people at once...it's unheard of..." Reborn murmured.

And then, Serena stood up. She'd been unconscious ever since they'd entered the room, but Tsuna's intuition was...acting funny. She had Mukuro's red eye, of course, but...she was doing the chicken dance.

"Ah, Tsuna, help me," she asked, flapping her arms with a smile. "I don't get this. This usually works..."

And then...she started shuffling. And singing. "Everyday I'm CIRCUS AFRO. Da da da da da da da da CIRCUS, da da da da da da da da AFRO, CIRCUS AFRO, CIRCUS AFRO, POLKA DOT, POLKA DOT, POLKA DOT, AFRO."

Uh...what? "Reborn, what's happening to Serena?" Tsuna asked nervously.

The hitman looked genuinely stoned. "I don't know."

She collapsed. The eerie feeling in his intuition disappeared.

Gokudera/Mukuro cleared his throat. "Well, now that that's over, let's continue!" He threw his dynamite at Tsuna.

"Aaargh!"

* * *

><p><em>Headache. Argh... <em>Opening my eyes, light filled my vision. The sun was just rising. This feeling...I was in air. Most likely a plane.

"_Flight 2453 is now landing. Please put on your safety belts_."

It took half a minute before I was even partially functional. Flopping out of my seat, I was surprised to see I was the only person on the massive plane.

"Miss, we're landing now. Please stay seated," a flight attendant instructed.

"W-What?"

The flight attendant gave me a dark look. "We're landing now."

Okay. OKAY. Last memory: Mukuro. Kokuyu Land. Which left a huge gap between then, and how I ended up on a landing plane. Did I lose my memory again? Or was this a dream?

I wasn't near a window seat, so I thought about calming things. Birds. Chirping, singing. Hibari and the canary. HIBARI. HIBARI'S TONFAS. PANIC. But before I could start screaming, we landed. It was about then, when I realized I had nothing on me. No passport, no money, no weapon. And I was still covered in a shitload of cuts, bruises and dried up blood.

Staggering off the plane, I only earned the occasional stare. Occasional – but when everyone in a busy airport 'stares at you occasionally', it's _pretty _bad. Before I could think about where to go, two men in black suits walked up to me. "Serena di Squalo?"

I blinked.

"We will accompany you to see the Ninth."

Pfft, I should've known. "What for?"

"He requests you eat breakfast with him tomorrow morning," one of the men replied distastefully. The blood on my clothes weren't exactly a fashion statement.

"And until tomorrow morning...?"

"You are to stay with the Varia." They handed me a passport, and in a matter of seconds, disappeared into the crowd.

Okay. Varia? Great. Getting through immigration and customs, I realized that I was in Naples. I'd been here a few times, after all. And there were a bunch of signs that blasted 'NAPLES, CITY OF BEAUTY' around so...yeah. I called the Varia, and three minutes later, a black sports car drew up beside me, and I climbed in without thinking twice.

Sadly, it wasn't anyone that I recognized. Some lower ranking subordinates, I supposed. "So," I smiled, trying to break the awkward silence. "Thanks for picking me up. How's life?"

"Dull," the driver replied with contempt.

The guy in the shotgun seat coughed before answering. "Uneventful."

"That's a shame. I'm Serena, by the way. Nice to meet you."

Both guys swerved around to get a better look or something. "You mean...t-the...I mean, the Varia Officer, Serena di Squalo?"

"The Commander's little sister?"

"Yeah?"

"We apologize! It's an honor to be in the Varia!" the yelled in unison, somehow bowing.

I laughed. "There's no need to lie. The Varia ain't exactly a cheerful organization to be part of. I uh...don't want to be rude or anything, but who's watching the road?"

*Truck horn blares...*

* * *

><p>Hours later, I entered Varia HQ through the front door, and walked straight to the dining room. Squalo, Bel, Mammon, Levi and Lussuria were arguing about something trivial as they ate lunch.<p>

Silently, I walked to the table, plopped down beside Squalo, took his plate, and began wolfing everything down. I didn't even bother taking a look - the only thing on my mind was FOOD.

"VOI! What the fuck are you doing here?" Squalo yelled, shocked.

"Eat. Shower. Then talk," I decided between mouthfuls. He sighed, and studied my wounds, as if he was attempting to find the source, before handing me a bread roll.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...dumbass is all beaten up," Bel mused, knives appearing in his fingers.

"Serena, how could you possibly wear that?" Lussuria moaned, staring at my beaten up shirt and shorts. "I bought an - "

"VOI! If Serena wears that slutty outfit you were talking about last week, I'll fucking gut you!"

Bel sniggered. "What an over-protective brother. I pity her~."

I finished the soup. "Thanks, phony prince. I pity myself."

*Knives glint* "I'm not a phony prince."

"Whatever you say, you fake prince."

A knife thudded into my roll of bread.

"I didn't say you were _phony, _I said you were fake. Oh thanks. I was looking for a butter knife. And...a salad knife - why not, a meat knife. No no, wait Bel, I don't need a fish knife - "

* * *

><p>People stared as we came out of the cinema. I mean, the Varia did have some crazy aura. "That movie sucked," Mammon complained.<p>

"Why are _you_ complaining? I paid for your ticket," I pointed out, following them.

"Time is money."

*Sigh*. That damned avaricious Arcobaleno. "Personally, I voted for Batman. The trailer music was cool."

"I say we should've watched Shark Night 3D," Squalo shrugged. "It's more realistic."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...not everyone like watching a bunch of sharks float around, Captain Longhair," Bel sassed. "Prometheus was obviously a better choice."

"If none of us wanted to watch The Avengers, then why the hell did we watch it?" I grumbled. "And where's Lussuria and Levi?"

"Lussuria went to watch Breaking Dawn," Squalo muttered. "Levi...who the hell gives the crap. Who's hungry?" _Seriously? After the buckets of popcorn they went trhough? Urgh._

I believe, Bel and Squalo finally found something that they both like.

Raw seafood.

Now, the occasional sashimi or sushi is fine, but a raw lobster that's still twitching...is just a little unnerving. "Squalo, that's...gross," I offered, watching him eat a piece with wasabi. He shrugged and ordered me something else.

Oysters.

"I swear, _to_ God, that I'll die if I eat that..." And then, he ordered:

A raw potato.

"..."

* * *

><p>"So...the Ninth, an extremely busy man, orders you to come to Italy...for breakfast?" Squalo grumbled, standing outside the bathroom as his sister showered. "You're kidding, right?"<p>

"I hope so too," Serena replied cheerfully over the sound of running water. "Since he's a deceitful bastard, he obviously has something up his sleeve."

"Tch. And all your injuries?"

"Oh, prison escapees. Few windows. Few walls. Nothing too major. Though Squalo, Lancia is no joke. I mean, you try to be nice, and he smashes you into a wall," she warned, as if Lancia's bad attitude was the thing he should've been worried about.

*Facepalm*.

She came out in a baggy hoodie and pants. Looking at him, she teared up, and quickly turned away. "I'm sorry Squalo. I screwed up again."

Mentally, Squalo shattered. There were four awkward 'the fuck?! What do I do?' moments on his list. Crying sisters, naturally took the first spot. "Ah, well, um...just...uh...what happened?"

"I had to make sure this French spy didn't die," she sighed, tracing a finger on the wall. "And now she's in intensive care at a hospital."

_VOI! Then why the hell are you saying sorry to me?!_

"And because of this whole mess, the yakuza took back Sapporoo," she continued miserably, making barely any sense at all. It was that point, when Squalo felt ashamed - his sister had basically gone through hell over the past few months, and he didn't even know what she was up to. "Squalo...what am I suppose to do...?"

Oh no. Second place on the list was giving advice to sad sisters. "VOI!" he yelled. "Suck it up."

Serena cried.

Third place: apologies. "Serena...I'm sorry. It's just...I don't...can't..."

Serena cried.

And fourth place: cheering up. He put a hand on her shoulder. "You did your best, right?"

"I-It wasn't enough." She glared - but not at him. "I just let everybody down - every, single, time."

"Well, sometimes life lets you down too," Squalo growled. "Fate let you down. Our parents let us down. I let you down. So it's not just your fault."

She punched him.

"VOI! What the fuck was that for?"

"We're even now," she sniffed, giving him a crashing hug. "Thanks Squalo."

Squalo thought his brotherly troubles were over.

Until the next day, that is.

Serena left the Varia mansion, confident, and her usual self for breakfast with the Ninth. She came back a few hours later.

Looked at Squalo.

And cried.

* * *

><p>"It's probably a phase," Lussuria offered, as Squalo held an emergency meeting. "Girls are meant to cry. I mean – sometimes you just need to...to let it out. I mean, guys rant. Girls gossip and cry. That's human nature."<p>

"The average woman cries emotionally 47 times a year," Mammon remarked. "That's how I make an extra forty nine million Euros a year."

Stare.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you made dumbass cry," Bel snickered at him, clearly enjoying the moment.

"V-VOI! I did not!" Squalo yelled defensively, standing up and waving his sword. "She – she just looked at me...and _cried_!"

"You made her cry," Lussuria stated flatly. "No doubt. Were you glaring?"

"NO!"

"Did you say anything?"

"NO! SHE JUST...!"

Levi grunted. "Well then, maybe the Ninth said something to her." They all suddenly paid attention. It really was rare for Levi to take part in these sorts of discussions. "I mean – she was as annoying as ever in the morning, right?"

That...was a good point.

* * *

><p>A week later, Serena left without a word, early in the morning. By mid-afternoon, Squalo was in a crisis. "VOI! What if she killed herself?" he ranted.<p>

"Dumbass is stupid, but she's not that stupid," Bel grumbled.

"Geez, Squalo, she'll be fine. She used to wander off all the time," Lussuria tried to reassure with a sigh.

The doorbell rung, and in a matter of seconds, the maid who answered ran screaming throughout the mansion. Swiftly, the Varia Officers ran out to see what had happened – and that was when they got the biggest shock of the year. If someone took a photo, it would've made a great Christmas card.

Xanxus, was sitting unconscious in a shopping trolley, at their front door.

"VOOOOOOOOOOIII! What the fuck?!"

* * *

><p>As the plane landed in Japan, I sighed. I'd only ended up staying in Italy for a few days. And instead of a relaxing holiday, I'd received a whole load of stress. I put an icepack on my head. W<em>hen this is all over, I'll make up for it, by whatever means.<em>

When I stepped back onto Japanese soil, there was a shout. "Serena! You're back!"

I turned, and Tsuna's anxious face studied my own. "I'm back?" Yamamoto, Gokudera and Reborn weren't too far behind from him.

"Everyone was so worried when you disappeared after Kokuyu Land," he explained quickly. "I thought you'd been taken to Vindice!"

"I've been, but I had business in Italy this time," I muttered.

"How are your injuries?" Gokudera asked, looking at my fresh bandages.

"Oh, don't worry, these are new," I surmised. "And you guys? How are you?"

"Dame-Tsuna couldn't move until yesterday with all the muscle pains he had," Reborn stated, looking at Tsuna shamefully.

"Ah well, you guys worked hard this time," I tried to say cheerfully. It came out as sarcasm, as per usual. "Why're you here?"

"Oh...well...um...we heard you were coming back, and uh...I kinda need a favor..." Tsuna laughed nervously.

Yamamoto laughed. "I just wanted to hang out. The baseball team was afraid you'd died."

I thought about the date. There were only four weeks until the end of the school year. "Let me guess Baka-Tsuna, does it have to do with the yearly exams?" I sighed.

"Yeah," he admitted shyly. "But uh...Hibari-san wanted me to pass on the message that you'd temporarily be head of the Disciplinary Committee."

"W-WHAT?"

"Ah...everyone else in the committee is in hospital..."

* * *

><p><em>A month later...<em>

Hibari yawned as he walked past the reception area of the hospital. The radio was playing one of those annoying English songs –

_When I see your face  
>There's not a thing that I would change<br>'Cause you're amazing  
>Just the way you are...<em>

Leaving the hospital, he did a brief patrol of Namimori before returning to his office. Just another peaceful day. It was the last day of school – the weather was nice, everything was in order. The paperwork in his office was neatly and correctly completed. Even the hallways were spotless.

Making his way to the roof, he saw the herbivore talking with Kusakube. Seeing him, she immediately stopped talking and ran up to him, wide grin etched onto her face.

"Yo Hibari! Long time no see. Most of the school's watching the baseball grand final, so I gotta go like...now," she remembered, gesturing at her club uniform. "Oh, and there's something..." She put two fingers in her mouth and whistled loudly. Almost immediately, the yellow canary from Kokuyu Land flew towards them, chirping his name. "Keep the bird. I've got a cat, so I can't. YOLO!"

Yolo. It wasn't Japanese, but it didn't sound like an insult, so he let it slide. "Kusakube. Go patrol the sports field."

"Hai, Iinchou!"

* * *

><p>Running to the sports field, I took a shortcut through the stands. I accidentally bumped into a kid walking with his Mom. "I'm sorry," I apologized quickly, bowing my head a little. Japanese customs were finally starting to get to me.<p>

The kid turned, and I took a step back. Now, why did he have Mukuro's red eye? His voice came into my mind. _Well, we meet again, assassin. I have a proposition for you._

I'd almost had a heart attack. "Later," I decided, breathing deeply. Looking at the field, I watched Yamamoto run a home run. My cue to get a move on.

* * *

><p>Hibari reclined on the roof and told the bird to be quiet. Surprisingly – it obeyed. He thought about the moment when the herbivore walked towards him, smiling, the sun oh her face, the fresh air that blew through her hair. And he couldn't help but think about that song he'd heard on the radio.<p>

When I see your face, I want to bite you to death. Because you're annoying. Just the way you are.

* * *

><p><strong>There's a poll up on my profile for those who want a pairing with Serena. If your particular pairing isn't there, leave a review or PM.<strong>

**Have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	22. Nostalgic Feelings

Chapter 22 - Nostalgic Feelings

I twisted. I turned. I jumped out of the window. I went back inside.

And still, I couldn't ease my hatred for the Ninth.

_*flashback*_

He'd been all kind like at first. We walked (actually, _he_ walked, I jogged to burn my anticipation) around the Vongola gardens for a great deal of time until we came to a small - but elegant - gazebo which was fully loaded with breakfast-y foods. He poured himself a coffee. I took a strawberry.

_Ah, but think about it. There must be some ulterior motive. Maybe it's poisoned...! _Throwing the strawberry somewhere among a clump of rosebushes, I too poured a cup of coffee – and switched cups with the Ninth. _But what if he's trying to double cross me? _I switched back. _But what if he's trying to TRIPLE cross me? _I switched the cups again.

"All the food and drinks are safe, Serena," he smiled gently, sitting down. "

_Lies! _I sniffed the jug of milk. "Oh – well then, what a...dreadful shame. I dislike this brand of milk. Preservatives and all."

"The milk is from a cow down by the fields. I'm not quite sure what you mean."

_Ulterior motive. _"I actually don't drink coffee." I emptied it behind my shoulder onto the grass. "And I'm not very hungry either, now that I think about it," I claimed, which wasn't all that convincing, as my stomach betrayed me with a deafening rumble. "I mean, *cough* I don't eat breakfast." He sipped his coffee, staring amusedly. Avoiding eye contact, I resisted the urge to run away. _  
><em>

"It's a beautiful morning," he mused.

"Just be blunt."

The Ninth took another excruciatingly slow sip of his coffee. "Have you ever wondered why I spared your life after...the Crib incident?"

_Crib incident? Wasn't he the one who said 'you are never to talk of this event ever again'? _"No. There was no need. You're an extreme sadist," I answered curtly, dead serious.

He smiled, as if I was making a cute joke. "I figured that when this day came, it would be good to have...some sort of a backup."

I admit, my self-control was being seriously tested. How happy could you be, if your arch nemesis suddenly smiled and said 'oh, I don't see you as a human being, I see you as an arrangement - a crap one too, and it's completely your fault'?"Enough of your riddles! What the fuck do you want?!"

"I want you to free Xanxus."

"...What?"

The Ninth pursed his lips. "You are aware of...how the events of that day ended?"

That day. Well, despite my numerous attempts, I was unable to erase it from my memory. "Xanxus was in a hot tub, and we had a pleasant conversation," I shot back sarcastically.

With a sigh, the Ninth poured another cup of coffee. "Well, I suppose I could - "

"NO. WHATEVER IT IS, NO. So how many people know Xanxus is an ice cube in your basement?"

"Including myself, Iemitsu and your brother, four."

Oh. Wow. Shock. What an honor. "I don't see why you can't tell Iemitsu to do it. He's your external advisor, right?"

The Ninth went silent.

"Fine then. No need to sully _his _hands. Do it yourself," I suggested.

"I cannot."

"Why? Too old?"

He shot me a dull look. "The higher ups know about the Crib incident. If I myself, am to free him, it would disturb the order in which the family - "

"Hang on a second," I interrupted, sick of his 'I'm so much more significant than you' language. "Let's get one thing straight. Seven. _Seven _damned years after you...turn your adopted son into a...a frozen...thing, you suddenly have an 'epiphany' that you should clean up the basement?"

"Xanxus has been on my mind every single day since the incident," the Ninth said sadly. "This is an issue that must be resolved."

"Resolved? RESOLVED? He was a _nut_ who wanted to kill everybody and be boss!" I ranted. "In a way, thinking of him as a block of ice gives me more reassurance than a crazed gunman. I mean, whoever frees him, is going to let this situation fall into some sort of a Vongola civil war -"

"Then that will be your duty to avoid a family dispute."

I looked at the Ninth to see if he was joking.

He wasn't.

"Alright," I laughed darkly, running a hand through my hair. "You. Want me. To break your adopted son out of your own basement. _Magically_ unfreeze him. And _if_ he's still _alive, try_ to calm him down although his last memory was probably his fake father doing some voodoo technique on him! Then what?"

He sipped his coffee. "That is your job."

FUCK THIS GUY. I overturned the table, and thousands of dollars worth of expensive china smashed onto the floor. "Without _hesitation_, you named _Sawada Tsunayoshi_ as the Vongola Tenth. Is that what I'm meant to God damn tell Xanxus?!"

"Of course. It is the truth, after all."

"And you _think _that he's just gonna say 'okay!' to Sawada, and they'll have a fucking tea party with fairy bread and get over it?!"

"You could always try that."

"NO!" _Breathe in. Breathe out. This is the Vongola Ninth. Look dignified. This was bound to happen. Because I might have the worst luck in the century._ I literally felt my heart stop as I made sense of his request. "You...you want me to betray the Varia? And if I refuse?"

"You pledged to obey my command. Have you forgotten so soon?"

The truth does hurt.

"Tell me this, Ninth." I really wanted to ask: do you want to FUCKING DIE? Or... do you enjoy FUCKING WITH PEOPLE? Instead, I found myself asking a perfectly logical question. "What are you willing to give up?"

He looked thoughtful. "Anything."

"Your life?"

"If that's what it takes."

I opened my mouth to say something, but decided against it. Standing up, I took a moment to study his face. I wanted to remember those words coming from his mouth.

"Oh, and Serena? This conversation never - "

"FUCK YOU!" I cursed at him out of the blue, finally mustering enough wrath. "Fuck you, you son of a bitch. Motherfucker! Cunt. Asswipe. Shit...head. Two-faced _bastard_. Munt. Sad...excuse for a human being!" I pulled the table upright again. But a wave of anger overtook me again, and I kicked it over, watching the wood splinter.

_Damn it, what a waste of a table._

* * *

><p>The cacophonous sound of the wind breached a chasm between my brain and my logic. You see, 40 000 feet in the air is a really bad time to have second thoughts. Quickly, I downed the can of red bull as the pilot gave the ok signal. <em>Suck it up Serena. <em>Jumping out, the adrenaline rush was...incredible.

_This is supposed to be fun...right?_

"I cannot believe you!" someone yelled.

For a second, I wondered another mentally unstable soul just happened to be skydiving coincidentally, but dismissed the thought. I closed my eyes, and voilà; Alexandra Knight waving a PS3 controller in one hand, drinking from a can of soft drink in the other and adjusting the headset around her neck with her cheek simultaneously. She started yelling at full volume. Personally, I felt sorry for the other people on the other end of the headset.

"How many times do you need me to repeat myself? If you die, everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, is so fucking screwed!"

_Geez...she has the new Assassin's Creed game already? How...?_

"Hey! Pay attention!" she complained, throwing the can at me. It missed by a mile. Quite literally.

"All you're doing is just telling me to do this and that!" I retorted angrily. "I am _through _with you. I can't do this, I don't want to do this - so get out of my brain! Let me die in peace damn it!"

"You can't die! You're so...insensitive and small minded, aren't you?! Do these people mean nothing to you? Do you want them to suffer?" she ranted, throwing the PS3 controller at me.

"If I try and fail, the future will still end up like that," I pointed out. "And I hate to be Johnny Raincloud here, but there is a _very _small success rate for the whole 'freeing Xanxus' and 'successful ring battles'."

"Oh come on. Everything will fall to place – guaranteed. Look." She stopped and sighed. "Think of this...as a game. The settings are set. You just gotta win it."

I ground my teeth. "And what if I don't want to play?"

She forced herself to calm down. "All you have to do, is suck it up and fix a few plot holes. Okay? Free Xanxus. Be logical. Now hurry up and open your parachute!"

Frustration burned in my mind, as I opened my eyes and reality stared me in the face. I started making out farms. "I DIDN'T FRICKING BRING A PARACHUTE. I CAME HERE TO DIE, YOU IDIOT."

"Aim for the bushes! It'll increase your chance of survival!"

"DO YOU THINK I DO THIS ON A REGULAR BASIS?!"

She started muttering under her breath. "Judging by the trajectory...velocity...wind shear...landing force...just hold out your arms like superman!"

"I NEVER WATCHED SUPERMAN."

CRASH.

And as I died a miserable coward, it became apparent that I'd led a horrible life. I didn't deserve to go to heaven, so I went to hell. And burned in pain. The devil cackled evilly and –

"Moo!" My eyes fluttered open. Where was I? _Is this...hay? _Tunnelling my way out, a cow stared me in the face. _A...a fucking hay stack?!_

_I...I can't even die. _Drowning, falling from high buildings, blood loss, asphyxiation – been there, done it. And I'd just tried falling 40000 feet without a parachute.

When I returned to the Varia mansion, Squalo grunted at me with his regular 'what up?' look. And I couldn't stand it. The torment of the sins I needed to commit peaked right then and there.

So I looked at his face.

And cried.

* * *

><p><em>A few days later...<em>

"I'm sorry we're about to close for - "

"Solte, I need a favor," I puffed, hands on knees. "You...do make jewelry for mafia inheritance and stuff like that, right?"

"S-Serena? You look like you...fell off a cliff..." he replied, giving me a hug. I resisted the temptation to grin like I'd always done when we were younger and say 'I won't next time'.

The shop didn't look all that special, but it seemed that his business was doing well. "Can make copies of rings?" I asked after we quickly caught up over tea. Apparently, after our last meeting, he couldn't get into contact with me, and I...may've momentarily forgotten about his existence. Well...a lot did happen... And besides that, M.M. was in jail. Again.

He scratched his head. "Huh? Yeah. Though...depends on the ring..."

Reaching into my pocket, I dug out the seven Vongola rings. "Perfect copies - can it be done?" I asked hurriedly.

Solte picked up two of them, and his smile morphed into a thin line. "Serena. Where did you get these?" he questioned calmly.

"...Borrowed."

He cast a curious gaze. "If this is for money - "

"It's not money," I stated firmly. "I can pay whatever price you name; how long do you need?"

Solte pinched the bridge of his nose. "Look, I don't even know if this is legal - "

"It's probably not."

" - but even if I were to help; the materials are just too - "

I pulled a small bag out of my pocket. "Is this enough? I only need the left half."

Pause. "Day after tomorrow," he decided. "BUT, at least tell me what this is for."

Crossing my legs, I held out both my hands. "A - bloody battle or B - apocalypse?"

* * *

><p>I bet I set a record for the crimes I'd committed in the past week. And the Vindice couldn't even bust me for it - since it was technically the Ninth's order. Stealing historical artefacts? No problem. Forgery? Why not. Breaking and entering places that officially didn't exist? Be my guest.<p>

And now, standing in a basement in front of a frozen Xanxus, I was confronted with yet another situation that called for a miracle.

In my visions, Tsuna and his guardians had made their rings burst into flame without a second thought. And I'd been shouting enthusiastically at a bunch of inanimate objects for over half an hour. How...does an inanimate object spontaneously combust, because you feel emotional?

"Light!" I commanded. "Flash! Fire!"

Nothing. Well, when they say yelling doesn't work, start from the beginning. So I sighed before I started. "You see, I was born on a Friday the thirteenth. And then - "

*several minutes later*

"- but then my parents died, but I had my revenge. Wasn't nearly as sweet as people describe. Shortly after that - "

*several more minutes later*

"-and now I'm absolutely raving mad." I gave up for the hundredth time. At this point, the rings were probably sick of laughing too. Leaning against a pillar I reminisced of my younger years. Being in the same room...was trauma. "Great. I finally pucker up the guts to betray my family, and I fail. Just fucking perfect," I muttered woefully.

And one of the rings lit. The blue one – rain, whatever. But it died almost as quickly.

"What the - oh, so you want to mock me? GO ON. BRING IT ON!" I snarled angrily. The storm ring blazed. And then the flame dispersed.

It wasn't much, but it was enough to make a hypothesis. Alright. A wide range of emotions. I could do that...at the same time...for an extended period...right? My hatred for the Ninth? Not enough. Ninth _and _Iemitsu? Nope. Bel? ...Closer.

Eventually, the ice around Xanxus melted. Emotionally exhausted, we fell to the floor simultaneously. Crawling over to him, I carried out a quick vitals check.

"...Trash...shark..."

_...Huh_? Then I remembered. His mind was set years ago. At the time, I probably still looked more...girly. Maybe he thought I was Squalo? "VOI!" My imitation was quite pitiful, I admit it.

Xanxus stared, but fell unconscious before he put the pieces together.

I managed to make it outside while lugging Xanxus without being noticed. Except...he was heavy. _Really _heavy. And as I turned the corner, I saw a shopping trolley, just sitting there. Who could possibly resist?

After dumping Xanxus at the Varia HQ, I exchanged the false set of Vongola rings in place of the real set. IThe fake left half went to the External Advisor. The real right half to the Ninth.

That night/very early the following morning, I went to the Cavallone mansion. I may've...forgotten to knock when I entered Dino's room. Tiptoeing up to his bed, he suddenly sat up, whip in his hand.

"Who's there?!"

"Aarrgghh!"

"Serena!"

"Aarrgghh!"

"Why're you..."

"Aarrgghh!"

"You can stop yelling now."

"Dino. You're not wearing a shirt," I complained, crossing my arms. "Or pants."'

He sighed, and there was a light ruffle. "You've seen me without a shirt plenty of times," Dino pointed out, swinging his legs out of the covers. "And I'm wearing underwear."

"That's not the point; you always tell me off for sleeping in underwear."

"Just...what are you doing here, Serena?" Dino looked at his bedside clock, and gaped. "Couldn't this wait till sunrise?"

"Dino. I need you to keep these for me," I said seriously, tossing him the box. He opened it slowly, and shut it after a brief glance. His mortified expression was somewhat refreshing, oddly enough. "I know what you're gonna say!" I interjected, before he could cut me off. "They're real. And yes, I did steal them. But it's for safekeeping. Just...just follow CEDEF's movements. About a month or two from now, Iemitsu's gonna send someone to Japan to give Tsuna the fake rings. You're gonna give him the real ones."

He was having a hard time acting calm. "Why bother going in such a roundabout way? What do you think's gonna happen?"

I looked grim. "Instinct?"

_*end flashback*_

* * *

><p><em>In some Japanese Hospital...<em>

"Serena...do I have to?" Shoichi whined as he was pushed along through hospital corridors. People stared. She clearly didn't care.

"Yes, you have to," Serena confirmed through gritted teeth. "Did you bring anything?"

"Pocky..." he admitted. Store-bought, cheap, last-minute get-well Asian snacks.

She cast a quick look at him. "Smart."

Shoichi stared at the black roses in her hand. "I thought you were visiting someone to get better...?"

"No, I'm just checking she's alive," she corrected. "And plus. She hates me."

"Then why am I here?"

"Because Terry Luck goes to _your _school! And she's in the same year, right?" By the way Serena was staring at him - the fact was probably supposed to make a difference.

"But...but...I don't know her," he murmured.

She stopped suddenly. "Shoichi, I'll admit it. The only reason you're here, is coz I don't have to guts or will to visit her alone. 'Kay?"

He shuddered. They arrived at room 108.

Taking a deep breath, she knocked and stepped in. "Hey, what's up?" she grinned, waving the bunch of depressing flowers. And...a book sailed across the room into her face.

"Oh whoops; my hand slipped," a sarcastic voice from the hospital bed accused. Shoichi never really took note of girls. Girls rarely took note of him. Serena was one of the first girls that actually had...a _conversation_ with him.

His first impression of Terry though...was scary. Despite that fact, her coffee brown hair and chocolate eyes made him think of a mocha coffee.

Serena picked up the book and closed it neatly. "I found a visitor." She nudged him to say something.

"Uh...hi Luck-san. I'm Irie Shoichi from the first class. I'm um...um..."

The girl made a thoughtful face. "Luck-san? Come on, what hell-hole planet are you from?"

He didn't get it. Maybe she had brain damage or something. "Earth?"

"That was rhetorical," she murmured. "And seriously, Luck-kun sounds way cooler. Hang on. I know who you are. I hate you! You're that weirdo nerd, who got first in the grade, right? One day, I'll make you feel the pain of being number two..."

Shoichi quickly shot Serena a 'can we please leave?' look. She shrugged back and pointed at the box of pocky. With a sigh, he held up the box. "I uh...thought you might like some. So uh, get better?"

"FOOD," Terry whispered, getting quickly out of the bed and snatching it from his hands. She looked at Shoichi with slitted eyes.

He coughed. "Um, your name is Terry Luck, right?"

"No, my name's the Roman Empire," she shot back. He noted that Serena's sarcasm was more natural. And most of the time, unintentional. But Terry's sarcasm was just so...blunt.

Serena had a stoned expression on her face. "You know, Shoichi. Why don't you two go to the summer festival together?"

"Are you going too?" he asked nervously.

"I'm on security duty, I think. But this is her first year in Japan, so you should be a man and...show her a good time," she mused on the spot.

"You mean...a date?!" he stuttered, as Terry gawked in unison. Shoichi recovered first."No way!"

"The FUCK no."

"An activity between to school mates is not necessarily a date," Serena shrugged, hands in her pockets. "I mean, Shoichi, you're probably going anyway, and Terry - you were bugging me about yukatas."

After a bit more conversation, visiting hours ended. "It was...fun," he admitted, as the walked down the corridor. Terry was surprisingly nice. Maybe he'd bring some more food next time he visited. He did (though forced) agree to bring her holiday homework. "Thanks for bringing me."

Serena pretended to be offended. "Fine - next time, you can be hit by the textbook."

* * *

><p><em>In Italy...<em>

Bel was bored.

It was times like this in which he actually..._missed_ the dumbass annoying him. Especially on a day like this – April fool's day. The previous year, they'd thrown pranks together. Mafia bosses against the Vongola family woke up to find that they had pedo mustache's permanently tattooed on their faces. And the Vongola family was frantic, because they _actually _thought the Ninth was HIV positive.

Dino found that all his horses had been colored to look like they were from 'my little pony'.

And Squalo had bright pink hair for a month.

He would've been lying if he'd said he didn't enjoy himself. Yet...this year, Bel's mind was blank. He just couldn't find anything inspirational and...original. He'd been sulking in his messy room when a piece a stack of paper overturned, and a sheet landed in his face. It was from the dumbass. Before the coup d'état. 'A Recipe for disaster'.

Skimming through it, Bel laughed. Perfect.

* * *

><p><em>In Japan...<em>

My doorbell rang loudly. Nibbles jumped out of my lap and ran upstairs. I was sincerely surprised. To be honest - I didn't even know I had a stupid doorbell. When I got to the door – no delivery guy, but a very nicely wrapped box. Bomb? I sniffed it. Smelled like...something I couldn't quite put my finger on. Going to the kitchen, I used a knife to cut off an edge.

A cake.

Opening it, I frowned. Now, who could've been the one that wrote the message in icing?

_Lussuria baked you a cake for April fools dumbass. ~Ushi shi shi shi~_

I was suspicious. Surprisingly, contrary to popular belief: Lussuria didn't know how to cook. And there was no way in hell he would've allowed Bel to write a message like that.

For quite some time, I questioned Bel's liability. But glancing at a clock, I groaned. Now I was late for the meeting with the local police about the summer festival security plans. I was meant to meet Hibari...five minutes ago.

Deciding that the cake would've been a good energy boost, I grabbed it and started eating as I sprinted.

* * *

><p>Hibari was pissed. Yet again. Why? The herbivore.<p>

He'd spoken 235 words that the herbivore was meant to say. And beaten up a bunch of weaklings that the herbivore was meant to defeat in name of the Namimori Middle Disciplinary Committee. A waste of breath and energy, he figured. Next he saw her, he was going to _bite _her to death.

There was a loud crash as a garbage can was tipped over. "Oh, geez, can't you stay on the right side of the fricking road? Gosh!"

Twitch.

"STARSHIPS, WERE MEANT TO FLY~ HANDS UP, AND TOUCH THE SKY~"

Twitch.

She walked up to a wall. "You wanna piece of me you little dipshit ogre? Huh? Take that! Ow..."

Hibari couldn't stand it. "Shut - "

It was then, when she finally noticed him glaring. "Hibari~!" she practically sang, running up to him for a wave or something. "I've been looking for you everywhere! But that doesn't matter. COZ I'M SEXY AND I KNOW IT. Jokes. AHA HA HA HA!"

Hibari's anger level - maximum. _Enough_. He swerved and struck out with both tonfas, but she dodged and..._hugged _him.

Hibari's anger level - maximum...plus one.

She sniffed his neck. "Did you have a shower this morning?"

His shock began to pass. "Get. O_ff."_

Pouting, she let go and did a series of cartwheels and flips, though accidentally crashing into another wall. Bringing out the spikes on his tonfas, Hibari lunged. What annoyed him the most, was that despite losing her mind, she was as fast - if not faster - that normal. "Here we go!" she exclaimed, doing a handstand on his head.

Hibari's anger level - maximum x 100.

But before he could attack, she lost her balance, fell on top of him, and they both toppled down a long flight of stairs. Hibari ended up on top.

"You know, Kyoya, I think I finally figured out why you hate Mukuro so much," she confessed. He jumped up, aiming a kick for her ribs. She dodged. "It's because you're older than him, but shorter. Though I'd be offended too, Hibari. I mean, Kyoya's just such a common name these days..."

Oh that was it. Death. Definitely.

But...she passed out.

No matter. He attacked all he wanted. For stress relief purposes. When his anger was just about gone, he found himself breathing raggedly. Unfortunately, she was still breathing. Figuring that she'd have something of high personal value in her pockets, he rummaged instead to find crumbly white flakes. He smelt it. And frowned.

Drugs. Most likely - illegal.

Well, not his problem. So now what? Leave her there? Police station? Hospital? All three would result in a juvenile detention center. After all that had happened, he was tempted to leave her to the authorities.

But...

* * *

><p>The cup of water was too far. I reached. Further. <em>Stretch just a little more and <em>– no. This wasn't working. I tried to move, but my body felt like it stuck in wet cement. Looking around, I couldn't figure out where I was. I mean, it looked like a bedroom. Family house. But who did it belong to?

After a few attempts, I managed to sit up. Pulling off the covers, I discovered that I was in my...undergarments. And maybe a few bandages, wrapped around my wrist and ribs. Last count, I didn't have so many...bruises. Was that a fracture? Huh. That was odd. A great deal of them looked like Hibari's tonfa marks.

Upon remembering his name, I shivered. Had it been my imagination...or did I actually..._hug _him? Just...just no. NO. Nightmare. Of course that was it. I crawled over the bed and put my feet on the floor. My headache worsened with the feeling of stable ground.

"Hello?" I croaked, wondering whose house I was in. Someone walked in. Like, barged in. Obliviously. "What the - "

It...was Hibari. Of all people. FML.

Quickly, I scrambled for the blankets, but he completely ignored me. Opening a wardrobe I'd barely noticed, he took out the first two things on top and threw them onto the bed. He shut the door on the way out.

It took a few minutes to get over my shock. Hibari Kyoya. He wasn't even in his _school uniform_. Looking at the clothes he'd thrown on the bed, I was confused. They were my size. And definitely made for women. How bizarre. What was Hibari doing with this sort of stuff? A bad thought came to mind. No way. Don't tell me he lived with his girlfriend...

Wait. Would a guy like him actually have a girlfriend?

...Impossible.

Was he secretly a cross-dresser?

Uh...unlikely. _Very _unlikely. I'll-bite-you-to-death unlikely.

Then perhaps...he was living in a student housing place. But it was too nice. And he was probably allergic to other people.

It took almost two minutes to slip into the clothes. Mustering my courage, I walked to the door, one slow step at a time. Opening it, I found Hibari was leaning against the wall outside, arms folded. Before I could say anything, his hand flashed in front of me – holding some sort of a bag filled with powder.

I decided to break the silence. "I don't know how much...or if any of that was real, but - "

"It was real."

Coughing (not because it was awkward, I just happened not to feel so well), I made sure to avoid direct eye contact. "I accidentally ate a cake made entirely from drugs. The uh, base was heroin, spongy bit was cocaine, filling was meth and the icing was ecstasy. I'm guessing the stuff in that bag...is mine. So uh...drug overdose." The bag disappeared from in front of my face. "I apologize," I added quickly. "For uh...everything. Since you know, - "

"You're not dead."

_No shit bro, I'm talking to you right now, aren't I?_

He seemed to read my mind, without even looking in my direction. "Drug overdose."

"Ah, high drug tolerance. Still, too much...is...too much," I admitted. I coughed again. "I'm sorry, but I can't imagine you in these clothes. Who do they belong to?" I asked, examining the t-shirt and shorts.

"Sister."

I blanched. I'd never considered Hibari having...well, a sibling. It just never...clicked. A twin, maybe? Bad thoughts raided my mind, and I panicked. _What if they're alike?! _"Holy shit! I'm so sorry! Was I sleeping her bed? Are you sure she doesn't mind - "

"She's been dead for five years."

Oh. Well. Shit. Wrong again. "Um...what about your parents? Should I - "

"They were in the same car."

...Double shit. "My parents were murdered when I was seven," I murmured, leaning on the door frame. I wanted to say I was sorry and that I could relate to his feelings, but that'd probably make it sound like I pitied him or something. And from experience, I figured he wouldn't like that. Especially in his own...home.

You know, it's funny. I had nothing to say to the guy. Normally, I could squeeze out a few phrases, even in awkward moments like these, but...nothing. And the thing is, I've been with some pretty complicated people. Like Bel, for instance. And Xanxus.

"Report for duty this afternoon. Today is the summer festival."

Summer festival. I did the math. That meant...six days?! I'd been unconscious for _six_ days?! I'd been...under the same roof as Hibari for SIX DAYS. Great. Now I didn't just feel like sitting down. I needed to find a bucket. Fast. *cough* I tugged the shirt. "I'll be leaving then. Could I borrow these clothes? I can give them back washed tomo - "

"Burn them."

Bad memories? Now I felt genuinely ashamed. That's judgment for you. I'd always figured that he was just weird because...well...because. But seeing the other side of the picture...

I bowed, wincing at the muscle spasms. "Thank you, Hibari-san."

* * *

><p>It's sad. I've actually never been to a proper festival. I mean, the last one I went to was crashed by the Vindice, which kinda turned me off.<p>

'Patrolling' was what I was meant to be doing, yet I couldn't help but gawk at the cool stands around. I won a goldfish. And accidentally killed it four minutes later because I flushed it down the toilet. At one point, I saw Shoichi trying to win Terry some stuffed toy she'd been staring at. I could've sworn I heard her squeal 'it's so fluffy I'm gonna die!'.

Due to some very bizarre tonfa shaped bruises, it wasn't very easy to run, so the best I could do with pickpockets and robbers were to stalk them long enough until they thought they blended in with the crowd, and _then _beat them up.

"Can I have...three chocolate bananas?" I asked by reading off a piece of paper to make sure my Japanese was right. Chocolate and bananas weren't exactly words that I used in the same sentence often. But I'd seen a lot of people with happy faces eating them. "Please."

"Ha ha, of course Serena!"

That laugh... Looking up from my paper, I saw Yamamoto with his normal wide grin. Tsuna and Gokudera were there as well. "Holy shit, you guys are actually running a stall?!"

Tsuna laughed awkwardly. "Well...we accidentally damaged the local library because of...Reborn...so..."

Gokudera muttered something under his breath. "Let me guess. You're with the Disciplinary Committee to collect 'a protection fee'?"

"I'm just patrolling..." I murmured, confused. What 'protection fee'?

"If you're patrolling, why're you buying so many bananas?" Gokudera questioned. "Slacking off?"

"No, I'm hungry. So what do you want me to do, stand around looking bloody ghastly?"

"Isn't that the fucking point of security?"

"Maa maa, it's your first time at the festival right? Go have some fun. I'm sure Hibari won't mind," Yamamoto insisted obliviously, handing over a small box. "The fireworks are starting soon. Are you watching them with Hibari and the Disciplinary Committee?"

I went into a short coughing fit. Hibari. He actually picked me off the street when I was high. That was just so...so...*speechless*. "Definitely not."

"Serena, where have you been for the last week?" Tsuna asked as I turned to leave. "You have so many band-aids ..."

"Pfft, I got into a fight with a washing machine and got stuck for a few days," I lied, waving it off. "Enjoy."

I'd discovered where they were launching the fireworks, so I made an educated guess that the best viewing spot would be at the shrine. It took me ten minutes to get up the stairs. I had to stop for a five second break at each step. There were one or two people there, so I tried to climb on top the shrine to avoid them.

I failed. My knee was extremely uncooperative.

As the fireworks started, I sat down on the steps to the entrance of the shrine. Halfway through, I noticed that there was someone standing not too far away. I froze. That uniform...oh fuck. _Hibari!_ Trying to move into the shadows, I twisted too fast and hissed in pain. _Did he notice?_ Seconds later, he was standing in front of me, with his classic glare. ..._He noticed._

"Why are you disregarding your duties, herbivore?" he growled, tonfa in hand.

"You're one to talk."

I focused on the fireworks. But Hibari's glare was starting to burn into my soul. "You want a chocolate banana?" I asked suddenly throwing him a stick. "Just enjoy the fireworks. This is a really good spot, anyways."

He looked at me funny. I felt my ears burn. Honestly, what was I _thinking_?! Never again, would I eat something that Bel offered without running multiple tests. We were both silent until the end of the firework show, and I noticed that the chocolate banana that I'd given him had disappeared.

Meh. He probably threw it somewhere.

* * *

><p><em>About a week later...<em>

"Xanxus." I swallowed, crossing my arms. "Long time no see."

He glared back. Suddenly, I liked video-chat. Because there's a real distance between you and the people on the other side of the screen. So, if he was absolutely too pissed at me, it wasn't like he could shoot me on the spot. It seemed that he was alone.

"You unfroze me."

"Me? No, you must be dreaming," I gawked. "Didn't you hear? I've been reassigned to Japan." His glare only intensified, and I flinched. Oh well, I was always a bad liar. "It was the Ninth's orders."

His eyes didn't leave my face. "I will become Vongola Tenth."

I coughed. "Well...you'd have to control the Ninth."

"That is not an option."

"Kidnap him. Keep him alive for small purposes. Replace him with his stunt double Antonio. Bribe Antonio."

The majority on people in the Vongola (including the ninth generation guardians) didn't know that the Ninth's health was in fact declining at a fast rate. Of course, he told me, because a) he knew I wouldn't care (actually, I was overjoyed) and b) he blackmailed me not to tell anyone, so I could get him the right medicines and stuff. And it wasn't everyday that the Ninth was well enough to attend meetings, so I found a stunt double for him. Antonio.

"Then you'd have the Vongola pretty much under your control," I surmised. "You can hand the rings of succession to yourself."

"And the other half with the External Advisor?"

"Fight for it?" I looked away and muttered quietly to myself. "Actually, why don't you save me the trouble and just have a tea party and get over it...?"

He heard me. "Die scum."

"Glad the feeling's mutual..."

* * *

><p>Soon, the holidays ended, and school started once again.<p>

My holidays had actually been quite productive. I spent approximately half of it defeating Yakuza south of Kyoto, and north of Fukishima - the other half was spent avoiding Hibari Kyoya.

As I strolled through the gates of Namimori Middle, I felt...out of place. The past few weeks had been filled with bloodshed; how could I trust myself to act...normal?

"Extreme! Join the boxing club!" Ryohei yelled, pumping his hands in the air.

I don't believe it. Of all people to be stuck in a class with.

Ryohei.

"I don't get it," I muttered as we walked towards the school hall. "Why the hell do Japanese students start school in _April_?"

He scratched his head. "I've heard that so when students start school, the sakura trees bloom, and it's a really extreme time for parents to take a photo."

Oh that's just ridiculous.

* * *

><p>Ignoring my math teacher, I instead imagined Mukuro's face. It was less creepy that way. "So. Mr. Evil Overlord. Why should I help you?"<p>

He seemed to like the name. "Ku fu fu fu...I can grant you wishes you'd never imagine possible..." he offered.

"No no, I'm not into that sorta stuff. Materialistic things have too little value. Breaking out of Vindice _is _said to be impossible, after all."

"But you know a way."

I raised an eyebrow. "What makes you think that?"

"You've outsmarted the Vindice once before."

"And I still ended up paying the price," I replied knowingly.

"Tell me what you know."

Breaking out of Vindice prison was one of the things I used to think about. A lot. So I'm telling you: it can't be done. Coz they'll just do their teleport thing and hunt you down whether you succeed or fail. "Mukuro, you're not in a high security prison cell at the moment, right?"

"Yes. The cell's six feet by - "

"Blah blah blah, not important. Is it just you getting out?" I cut off, catching on to an idea.

"It'd be best if Ken and Chikusa were freed with me. I need henchmen, after all," he mused.

I interlocked my fingers. "In that case, I do have an option. You need to get all three of you to be busted and put on night cleaning duty. Then start a fire and escape through the sewerage."

"If it's so simple, why hasn't anyone else escaped in the past?" Mukuro asked suspiciously.

"Coz people in lower security are more stupid," I put simply. "No offence."

He said something unspeakably nasty under his breath.

"But keep in mind, Mukuro, the Vindice want you more than Ken or Chikusa. And they'll hunt you down. So if you're caught – they'll be less likely to go for Ken and Chikusa."

"You're telling me to sacrifice myself," he stated bluntly.

"If the time comes," I added as an afterthought. "Even if they are your loyal...tools. Two fingers are better than no fingers. Four year olds know that much." I smirked.

And the smirk dropped as soon as I opened my eyes. My teacher did not look pleased. At all.

"So, Knight-kun, what _have_ you been rambling on about for the last five minutes?"

...was none of that conversation in my mind...? I looked at her directly in the eyes, thinking quickly. "My imaginary friend says 'hi'. He says you've gained weight. I mean...! Lost weight. Definitely." _  
><em>

"Detention."

_Normal? Gosh, what was I even worried about?_

* * *

><p>"Today we're making omelets!" my home economics teacher grinned. The girls around the room cheered. I sulked. "First, I'll give a demonstration." She lit the stove and told a few of us to get a few ingredients from around the room. "Knight-san, are your shoes tied today?"<p>

"Yeah."

"And you're sure you haven't touched any alcohol?"

"Mm hm."

"And _none_ of your fingers are broken?"

"None."

"Good. Can you pass me the pan then?"

Without really looking, I passed it to her over the stove.

"Knight-san! Your sleeve's on fire!"

Huh? OH SHIT. So I'd forgotten that there was a flame on the stove. _This isn't the first time I've been on fire. Chill. _Trying to stay calm, the girls around me started screaming and running. What was the lyrics of that song again? THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE. Quite literally now, I suppose.

The teacher panicked. I sighed, casually shuffled to a tap, and opened the water on full blast. Apparently the tap had never really been meant for that, because it broke off and water spurted all over the room. At least the fire died out.

"Serena!"

I turned around. Oh. The teacher had finally gotten a hold of herself. Why was she holding a fire extinguisher?

*Spray...*

Bloody brilliant. Spray me with a fire extinguisher when I'm not even on fire any more.

Ending up in the infirmary, my jaw dropped. "S-Shamal? Well. It's uh...nice we meet again."

He looked like he had trouble remembering me. "Ah yes. How did it go? With the screwed memory?"

"It went...fine. Remind me, which idiot hired you here?"

"I dunno...Hibari Kyoya, I think?" he shrugged. I facepalmed. He stared at the burns on my arm. And the swollen patch on my cheek, where the teacher had accidentally whacked me in the face with the fire extinguisher. Accident my ass. I'd my life bet she hated me for all the paperwork she got because of me. "Need any help?"

"That would be rather nice since, you know, since my skin's starting to peel off and all."

* * *

><p><em>That afternoon...<em>

"Something's wrong."

Looking at the television screen, I noted Iemitsu's serious face, and went back to eating my instant ramen. After about a minute, neither of us said anything, so I figured that he was waiting for me to say 'what's wrong?'. "Iemitsu, you seem to think I care about your shitty problems."

"The Ninth has given his half of the Vongola rings to Xanxus."

I drank some of the soup, and flicked through a book on second year Science. Teaching was still a better option than cleaning out files for the principal. "You seem to fucking think I _care_," I repeated, not bothered to look at the screen.

"It's funny, Serena. You seem rather calm. I did just say 'Xanxus'."

Curses. I'd forgotten that I wasn't meant to know. "Well, you're screwing with me. Isn't that obvious?" I asked sweetly.

Iemitsu put on a deadpan expression. So I suppose he didn't fall for my lie. "Have you found suitable guardians?"

"Almost. I'm still waiting for the mist guy to break out of prison," I admitted. "I'll send you a report on them."

"Get a move on. I need you to collect the rings and give them to Tsuna."

I fell out of the chair. "Fuck no."

"Did I just hear you say...no?" he said, deliberately pretending to sound thoughtful. "In that case - "

"I mean, since this is...an emergency situation, would it not be better for...a more reliable and easily uh...accessible person...like...uh...Basil? Yeah, Basil. He's totally a guy you can rely on with the Vongola rings," I insisted, interrupting. I didn't need any more blackmail, thank you very much.

He looked thoughtful. "Very well. But do not fraternize with the enemy."

As he hung up, another video chat opened. Oh well, I didn't expect to cross Iemitsu's order so soon.

"Will you bear the Cloud Ring for Xanxus?" Squalo asked abruptly.

In the background of the video, Xanxus and the rest of the Varia Officers stared, rings lying in front of them on a table. The focus of some seriously dangerous people made it hard to find my voice, confidence and faith.

"No."

The temperature suddenly felt like it dropped below zero. Squalo didn't look all that unhappy. I saw the corner of his mouth twitch as if he was trying to suppress his urge to laugh. Xanxus continued glaring.

I felt the need to explain myself. "I've been under 24/7 observation since the coup d'état. Iemitsu can find fault in anything I do, and penalise the Varia for it. Not to mention - his orders come above yours, Xanxus. I can't even tell you what country I'm fucking in! It benefits everyone if I don't take it."

"VOI! I told you she'd say no," Squalo grumbled, shooting Xanxus a dark look. "Go find another Cloud Guardian."

"Shut up, trash-shark." His gaze focused back onto me. I speculated that in Xanxus language, it was cue for me to have a revelation of some sort.

*Cough*. "Well, I do have an idea. Has anyone ever heard of a Mosca?"

Mammon looked up. "It's a military secret project. It requires a powerful special life force."

"Well, I don't mean to state the obvious, but down in the basement, there's only _one_ prisoner; which...just so happens to be a 'powerful special life force'," I offered, trying to send implications. They seemed to get it.

"You want us to use the Ninth...as a guardian?" Lussuria asked, confused. "But isn't that - "

"Correction: you're only using the Ninth's energy. The guardian would be a virtually damn near indestructible robot. What have you got to fricking lose?" I sighed. "Iemitsu's already made his move, I suppose. If you want the rings, get a move on." They hung up without saying goodbye.

Betrayal is...painful.

Figuring my day couldn't possibly get any worse, I went to walk my cat. Actually, you can't really walk a cat. More rather, I was just following Nibbles, who was darting along the pavement. I was so focused on the floor that I didn't notice a school student stoop down in front of us. I almost tripped over them.

"Ah...I'm sorry, is this your cat?" the girl asked shyly, looking up. I took a step back. _For Mukuro to go as far as to possess a girl...! _And then I regained some composure. No, this was just a look alike. Similar facial aspects.

"I...I suppose so..." You see, most people were freaked out by its eyes. And if not, they would be when they were attacked. But Nibbles was actually...purring. Surprise surprise.

"Do you not like cats?" she asked, as if confused by my reply.

"I was always more of a...dog person," I admitted sheepishly. "After all, they're loyal slaves. Do you like cats?"

"They're cute."

_Who the hell is this girl? She looks...too familiar. _Just when I was about to ask for her name, Nibbles ran onto the road. "Ah, neko-chan!" the girl called, following Nibbles.

"Chrome!" I blurted. The traffic lights were green - a truck sped along the road. But Nibbles just stood in the middle of a hit zone, licking its paws. And then it hit me. This _was _Mukuro. Well, not yet. It was Nagi. And she was going to get hit by a truck...like now. I ran to her and dragged her out of the way or the blaring truck – it came by so close that I could feel my breath being sucked away.

A horn blasted as a car raced towards us in a different lane.

_Oh shit...!_

* * *

><p>"Heard you were in an accident yesterday," Terry yawned, dumping her school bag beside my hospital bed. "Shoichi was busy, so he said he was sorry that he couldn't come."<p>

"How'd you find out?"

"I asked my uncle."

I was tempted to ask who her uncle was, but in all truth: I was too depressed to be interested. "How's life?" It was a conversation starter. Neither of us cared about the reply.

"Huh? Oh. Shoichi and I are in the same class this year. But he's been acting real unusual lately..." she trailed off. I waited for her to explain further. "You see, at Yumei, there's this tradition in which you write a letter to yourself about what you want to be when you grow up, and a couple years later, they send the letter back to you. Well..."

"And what weird thing did Shoichi do?"

"He...burned all his books and said he wanted to be a musician or some shit. He's better now, though."

I stared off blankly.

She paused and shot me a quizzing look. "I heard about that other girl that got hit. They say she isn't going to make it."

"Well, they said that you wouldn't make it. But you're still here, nagging me..."

"This is why I hate you."

The comment was so sudden, I actually looked at her. "Come again?"

"That expression. I hate it. When I met you at the airport, you had that stupid-ass expression on your face."

Momentarily, I wished I had a mirror. "So...it's _not _because I accidentally shot you in the ass with a tranquilizer dart?" I asked innocently.

She glared. "That too. But when you have this...dull expression, it's just so..._annoying_! That...that 'oh, I'm just some ordinary person with a lame-ass life. Everything's absolutely fine' face."

"Everything _is_ fine, if you haven't fricking noticed."

*Punch*. She sighed. Deeply. "Serena. It's not your fault. The girl that got hit? She went to save the cat. And if you want my opinion, it was better that she was run over by the family car, than the truck."

"It was my cat." I flexed my fingers with more force. "I was lucky – I went over. She went under the wheels. Actually, the driver ended up braking on _top _of her. She was still conscious in the ambulance, and she asked about a stupid cat - how could I tell her it was a red blotch on the road?!"

Terry kept a straight face, and nodded. It was actually quite nice to have someone to talk to about these things. I was a little grateful that she visited. Personally, I felt slightly remorseful that I hadn't been all that supportive for her. "Sometimes...the truth hurts," she shrugged.

"Yeah, but knowing the truth hurts twice as much."

"It's not like you haven't hurt people before. People get hurt. People die. You should be used to this stuff! Get over it. Nothing will benefit you with grief."

"Grief is the price of love?"

"Shut up. Just think of the cup as half-full."

I blinked. "But I'm not thirsty."

She sighed, and handed me a straw. "Here's a straw."

"What's the hell is this for?"

"Now suck it up. "

"Suck what up? I don't have the cup."

* * *

><p>Luckily, I'd been able to act anxious enough for doctors to think I was suffering from severe PTSD. Actually, now that I think about it, it wasn't actually that hard. Anyways, I earned another day in the hospital - another day free of stress.<p>

"You were right."

"So, Mukuro. Vindice remains impregnable?"

My mind flooded with his memories. The actual escape. Separating with Ken and Chikusa. Getting caught. Being shoved in a jar. They cut off abruptly, and I felt light-headed.

"I met a girl."

I started clapping, slowly. "Good job Mukuro. I always figured you'd find your 'other' out there. And a girl too? But...but you're in a pickle jar. I don't really think this is gonna work out between you two...I am so, so sorry..."

Bad and explicit images flooded my mind. "She can be used as a vessel."

I couldn't actually see illusions properly. Did that mean these images were memories? "You know - "

"The girl I met is called Nagi," Mukuro cut off impatiently. "I've made organs out of illusions for her, but I need you to handle the paperwork. Keep Ken and Chikusa under the radar when they get to Namimori, and get her to them," he snapped. His almighty presence disappeared.

_Well. There goes my stress-free day._

* * *

><p>The doctor's coat was itchy. And a little long. "I'm so sorry...but your daughter Nagi passed away last night. Her organs failed sooner than we expected, and we were unable to save her..." I lied, trying to look sympathetic.<p>

Her mother was supposedly a famous actress, but I guessed the tears were real. In a way, I hoped they were. Getting her to sign a bunch of paperwork, I hung the coat up where it belonged, and walked across town to another hospital. I knocked before entering the room.

"H-Hello..." Nagi murmured, sitting up. "How are your injuries?"

"Uh...a little better. I just met your mother. So technically you don't exist right now," I announced, showing her the signed documents. My gaze softened. "But you're sure about this, right? I mean...Mukuro's a shifty guy." _I mean taking over a guy - fine. But a girl?! Despite the different anatomy, it's considered pervy and...and...a violation of personal space. Mukuro is one fucked up pedo._

"He saved my life," she answered firmly, instinctively touching her waist with her palm. "I will return the favor."

I looked at a piece of paper with Mukuro's name on it. "Actually, I need you to choose a name. You know, that guy – Rokumo Kurodo – he's kinda touchy. And arrogant. And - "

" Who?" she asked, clueless.

Thinking for a moment, I realized my mistake. "Ah, I have dyslexia. Weird, usually doesn't bother my Japanese...anyway. I meant to say Kuromu Dokuro. Urgh. His name is Mu-ku-ro Ro-ku-do."

"I like it," she said suddenly. "Chrome Dokuro. It's nice."

Blink. Well. That works too.

* * *

><p>Another few weeks passed without too much of an event happening. I didn't want to play baseball, but Yamamoto somehow convinced me to be the team manager.<p>

I waited and waited for Squalo to arrive in Japan so I could stop worrying about every little thing that could've caused the whole mess to become a disaster. To pass the time, I continued working on my fundamental mission. It'd barely been a year, but I could already see the finish line - only a few major Yakuza families remained. Many had seen the results of my handiwork, and stepped down honorably. The remnants seemed to be making my job easier by merging into larger groups.

Lately, I'd started avoiding crowds. I probably wasn't anything like Hibari, but I couldn't stand them because...well...there were times when I was tempted to go on a violent rampage. What scared me more, was probably the fact that I would've probably gotten away with it.

Playing a gentle song on the piano, I swallowed my thoughts. I let the music calm my nerves. Chopin was a genius. After about an hour, I decided that I should go grab something to eat. Most of the things in my fridge had been sitting in there for so long, I couldn't even guess what it had once been.

As I walked into the town square, I wasn't sure if I heard correctly. An explosion, I swear. I took out one of my earbuds and turned down the volume of my iPod, just in case. Maybe the screaming and numerous running people were making my hearing go all funny

BOOM.

It was definitely closer this time. What was it?

Making my way down to the train station, my mouth became a thin line. Dino was there on one side talking to Squalo. I could only stand there like a statue, frozen as Squalo took the Vongola rings from Tsuna and jumped onto the roof of the train station.

I couldn't help Dino without going against Squalo. I couldn't help Squalo without going against Tsuna. So maybe standing there doing nothing was the best option.

It was then, when Squalo and I made eye contact. Instantly, he glanced from Tsuna, to me, and realized why I had originally left Italy. Tapping my watch, I held up three fingers and pointed at a directory sign to Namimori Park. He nodded and jumped onto the roof, showing that he had the Vongola rings. Basil yelled something inaudible as Squalo disappeared.

So. Let the Varia Arc begin.

* * *

><p>OMAKE<p>

**A/N: Hibari's about 9 in the flashback. I figured that every OC story has their own sort of version of the characters, right?**

*flashback*

_Hibari opened the door to his sister's room. "Mom wants you to hurry up."_

_His sister recoiled out of the chair with a look of surprise. "Geez, Kyoya! That's creepy. Knock next time."_

"_No."_

_She stood up and twirled in her yukata, studying his face for a reaction. "Do I look cute?"_

"_You're so ugly the yukata looks bad."_

_She grinned, ruffling his hair, despite his attempts to swerve. "Is that really how you treat your nee-chan? You sure you're not going to the festival tonight? They'll have chocolate bananas! You know how much you like them. Did you know the shrine's a secret place for watching the fireworks?"_

"_I don't like crowds."_

"_Gosh! You're such an antisocial kid. You went last year, didn't you?" she whined, trying to convince him. "I'll pay for anything you want."_

"_I'm not going."_

_His sister tutted. "You'll end up all alone when you're my age. When you're sixteen, I want you to bring home a nice girlfriend so we can go shopping and tease you together. You've gotta be a cool guy, you hear?"_

_Hibari glared, blew a raspberry, and slammed the door to his room. He heard her laugh gently at him. "I'll bring you back something."_

But of course, she didn't.

He never saw any of his family again. As he watched the fireworks, aware of the herbivore sitting silently beside him, he chewed thoughtfully on the banana, and couldn't help but feel...a little nostalgic.

* * *

><p><strong>Artemis Kuromoru - yeah, she kinda is indestructible but she's still human. Too much, is well, I suppose too much. Drugs and stuff still affect her, but it takes a lot to make a little difference. Sorry if I confused you. *bows apologetically*<strong>

**Inoko-chi - Fran? Definitely. In the future arc though, so it might be a while though...**

**Have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	23. What the Fuck is Angst?

**Nothing actually happens in this chapter, feel free to skip it.**

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 23 - What the Fuck is Angst?<span>

The sun had already set, so there weren't any kids on the playground, thank God. They're just a _little _annoying. Yeah, I know what you're thinking, but: I'm not a hypocrite. From personal experience, I can easily say I tried extremely hard to be a pain in the ass.

Sitting on the swing, and stared at my feet. There was an odd chill in the air. Well, either that, or it was just a naturally chilly night.

"You really want to catch a cold?" a nostalgic voice muttered. A coat was thrown over my head.

My gaze met Squalo's. And I instantly smiled. His presence just had that sort of an effect. "Thanks. But...your coat smells god _awful_. Where've you been?" I gagged, trying to limit my breaths.

"Tch. I found the CEDEF kid on the plane; it crash landed. We spent the last few days on a boat," he admitted, but his expression turned hard. "We need to talk."

"Shock horror. We are talking."

"VOI! That's not what I mean." He shook his head, as if he was scrapping an idea. "I mean about that brat today. That was the rumored Jap kid, wasn't it?" Squalo realized. "And this whole time..."

I sighed glumly before answering. "He's a candidate for the Vongola Tenth. I'm supposed to watch his grades, make sure the area's clean of other families - " Squalo walked up to me, and without warning, flicked my forehead. Hard. "Ow! What the hell was that for?!"

"You don't have to tell me everything you do," he grumbled, "but if you ever leave Italy without telling me first, I'm gonna be really pissed."

"...Won't happen again."

* * *

><p>I suppressed a yawn, looking at my handiwork.<p>

Fake passports were never really my forte, after all. Still, it had taken longer than I'd expected. By several hours. Nevertheless, they were finished. My eyes shifted to my watch, and I put my face in my hands, groaning out loud. Three in the morning. Come on.

_Nice guys finish last, that's why I'll treat you like trash, it's not what I re–_

With a quick scan of the caller ID, I picked my mobile. "Dino. You know how you always complain about me calling and waking you up at _really _shitty hours? Well, isn't this just a little hypo- "

"Serena."

I stopped talking abruptly. Why wasn't this Dino's voice...? "Iemitsu, uh, well, pleasant surprise. *Yawns*. You know, I'm _really _tired, so I'll uh, get back to you on this. Good morning."

"Meet me at Namimori Shrine in ten minutes." He hung up, leaving me listening to a number of hollow beeps.

* * *

><p><em>At Namimori Shrine...<em>

Dino was uneasy. Being around Iemitsu always gave him confused feelings. Of course, he disliked his questionable attitude towards Serena. Yet...he had to be nice and respectful to avoid family disputes. And it wasn't like Iemitsu had ever done anything nasty to Dino_._

Serena bounded up the last of the steps to the shrine, clearly out of breath. "Holy fuck, I made it on time!"

As Iemitsu marched towards her, Dino followed, only a step behind. "You know why I've called you here," the older man spoke softly.

"To do tai chi together and boost our health?" she puffed, straightening up. Dino shook his head solemnly. _Not the time, Serena. _She sighed with a small nod in acknowledgement. "Fine. Ask away."

"Why did the Ninth choose Xanxus as his successor candidate?"

She paused. "I dunno. You'd have to ask him yourself. I have no idea how that guy's head works."

"Don't screw with me, Serena," Iemitsu growled, voice rising. "Why is Xanxus free?"

Dino paled significantly. "X-Xanxus?"_ Shit, from the way Serena acted, I thought the guy was dead! _

Seeing his concern, Serena shrugged casually, almost as if the news didn't matter in the least. "The Ninth ordered me to unfreeze him. But he didn't say why."

"Why did you replace the Vongola rings with fakes?"

With a sigh, she turned away from him, looking over the sleeping town. "It doesn't really matter why I did it; it matters more that the Varia doesn't have the bloody rings in their possession, doesn't it?"

Iemitsu spun her around by the shoulder. "Why."

"Would you really prefer it if Squalo got away with the _real_ Vongola rings then?"

"Answer me!"

The tension sky-rocketed. Deciding that an adequate amount of glaring had passed, Dino cleared his throat. "Iemitsu, please do not talk to my External Advisor with that tone. And Serena, show more respect - "

Serena cut him off. "It's fine Dino. After the whole Mukuro fiasco, the Ninth fordered me to free Xanxus. So I did. I figured the only fricking reason he would do that would be to make Xanxus his successor," she rambled, without taking a breath.

She was lying. Dino could tell. But more importantly, Iemitsu couldn't. So he kept his mouth shut.

"But, most people wouldn't agree, and frankly, Xanxus doesn't like no for an answer. I thought the Varia might take your half of the rings by force, so I had a fake set made, and switched them. The Cavallone Family had the real ones."

"Why the Cavallone?" Iemitsu asked, gesturing to Dino.

"Coz Dino's a trustworthy guy," Serena answered without hesitation, and Dino felt instantaneously proud. "I would've lost them. And well, if they were in my possession, I would've probably lost them. I'm sorry for involving you in a crime, Dino."

"No hard feelings," he muttered, curious as to what secrets Serena had to hide. From the look of things, they sure weren't pleasant.

"I assume you've made contact with Superbi Squalo," Iemitsu continued almost lazily. "You're accompanying him out of Japan, aren't you? That solves a lot of problems, good job."

"That's none of your business," Serena said curtly, unable to keep the spite from her voice. "I'm not doing it for you."

Iemitsu's eye twitched. Just slightly. "I'll have you recall that I have more power than the Varia."

"And I'll have you recall we all live fickle, volatile, mortal lives." In unison, they took a large step closer to each other, raring to release their exasperation.

"All right, that's enough!" Dino called out stepping into the midst of hostility. "Iemitsu, whether or not Serena's doing it to help the Varia - Squalo's taking the rings to Italy, and that'll buy time for Tsuna. He and his friends need to grow; I saw that myself. There's no need for this."

A plane flew over. A bird chirped. A dumpster truck drove by the bottom of the shrine. But hesitantly, Iemitsu and Serena returned to their tolerable distance. Dino relaxed a little. "Serena, how long do you think Xanxus will be fooled by the fake rings?"

"At most...never. Worst case scenario...well, first glance," she considered. "Three if Xanxus drinks more tequila. But I have faith in my friend, so at least five."

Iemitsu nodded stiffly. "Very well. Go to Italy with Squalo."

She sighed crossing her arms. "You want fries with that?"

Dino started dragging her away before his apprehension could escalate. Serena really did have the ability to piss people off to extremes, huh? "I'll see to it she does, Iemitsu. Well then, we'll be off."

"Serena. I want you to get orders from the Ninth. I want an answer on why he unfroze Xanxus. Understood?"

"Well, I don't really feel like it, so maybe!"

Dino could barely pick her up and run away fast enough.

* * *

><p>As I walked back somewhat miserably to my living area, I tried to keep my eyes dead ahead. Dino's face practically screamed for the truth, but I just couldn't bring myself to tell him. Just before he could voice something, I interjected, hoping he'd forget.<p>

"I heard you were tutoring Hibari Kyoya," I started tentatively. "You don't have to, you know. I mean, he's fucking violent."

"It'll be fine," he grinned, ruffling my hair. "How bad could he possibly be? I put up with you okay. And plus, you wrote a recommendation letter."

*Glare* "I'm just gonna pretend that was rhetorical. First off: he won't read the letter. The retarded guy tries to kill me on a daily basis, Dino," I complained, shaking my head to clear the bad thoughts.

He looked up at the sky as we moved along, and took a deep breath. Dino looked genuinely...cool. Well, until he tripped on gravel. Helping him up, he held my arm with an iron grip. "Serena, I want you to promise me you'll come back from Italy in one piece. And I want you to choose which side you'll be on."

"What if I choose the Varia?" I murmured, rooted to the spot. "Will you kill me?"

"Of course not! Whatever makes you happy is fine with me," he insisted, straightening up. I couldn't help but give a mischievous smile.

"In that case, I'll just kill you."

"...Really?"

"I'm kidding," I reassured. "I couldn't kill you if my life depended on it."

Dino looked extremely thoughtful. "Would you catch a grenade, throw your hand on a blade, jump in front of a train, take a bullet straight through your brain and die for me?"

"...Don't push your luck."

It felt too soon, but we arrived at my somewhat abandoned street of warehouses. "Wow, this is your home, Serena? No wonder I couldn't find it," Dino murmured, craning his neck to study higher floors. "Nice place."

"It's not a home. I just live here."

"...Right." Thoughtfully, he ruffled my hair once more. "Well, I'd love to visit, but I'm sure there are better times."

_Yeah, like when my brother probably won't try to kill you. _"Yeah, sorry."

Turning to leave, he waved. "I'm holding you to that promise!"

* * *

><p><em>Later that morning...<em>

"Yo! Wassup!"

Squalo facepalmed. You see, when there are multiple witnesses for a wild rampaging guy in public, the last thing the guy would want to do is be seen in public. Or that was, the general idea. But Serena had insisted on taking a _public _bus. And wearing...gaudy clothing. And now, she was waving cheerfully to a _police officer_. Just...*facepalm*

"Oh, good morning Serena. You're not at school today?" the man asked curiously, folding his arms.

"Oh no, I'm going on holidays with my brother," she stated with a smile, gesturing in his direction. "I'm finally going back to Italy."

He was barely able to contain his frustration. Pointing at _him _to a _police officer_. Maybe Serena had gained a serious mental illness in Japan. The officer raised an eyebrow and glanced back and forth between him and what was probably a description. "Uh huh. Good day Sir. Could you tell me why you're in Japan?"

Squalo was about to grunt and tell him to get lost, but Serena threw an arm around his shoulder. "Ah, I'm actually afraid of flying so...eheh...he came to pick me up."

"Oh really?"

And so, almost an hour later on the plane, Squalo finally had the privacy to have a proper conversation with Serena. "So. You're close with...law enforcement...?" Squalo murmured, letting Serena take the window seat on the plane. Unfortunately, due to late booking, they were stuck in economy class.

She stretched. "You know how I told you I joined this Disciplinary Committee thing? Well, it's like the neighborhood watch. I know about half the police force in Namimori," she passed off. "It comes in handy, anyways."

Squalo couldn't deny it. None of the security officers had looked at him twice.

Before he could actually ask what he wanted - Serena had slumped on his shoulder. Considering that her iPod was blasting at full volume, and the number of energy drinks and ice cubes she'd consumed, Squalo couldn't help but let a small smirk escape.

Hopeless.

The plane hadn't even gotten onto the runway.

* * *

><p>Twas a lowly patch of turbulence that woke me from my nightmarish cannibalistic doughnut. I found that I was sleeping in Squalo's lap. Getting up quickly, I accidentally elbowed him in the gut. "Stop moving," he muttered, choking on a piece of fruit.<p>

Sitting up properly in my seat, I glanced at my reflection in the window. Oh brilliant. Bed hair. "Is it lunch already?" I asked groggily.

"Dinner," Squalo corrected. "I figured you would like chicken better than pork."

I opened the container. It was stone cold. "What do you have?"

"Chicken."

"It looks like shit."

"It is shit."

"I don't want to eat shit."

"Eat shit or starve."

"You eat shit or starve."

"I am eating shit."

...fair point. I made a mental note to never travel with economy class again. "Did anything happen?"

"Mild turbulence, kid across the corridor finally fell asleep, the guy three rows back threw up four times, they have terrible movies, and their headphones suck," he muttered poking at his food.

"Uh huh." I felt nauseous. Which was weird - actually it was a first time thing. I played my food a little, without much of an appetite. "Squalo, what's Xanxus like now?"

"Hm? Angry. All the time. Throws a lot of glasses at people, drinks a lot of tequila, shoots people more often than before."

I paled. Maybe I'd spent a little too long basking in the safety of being halfway around the world from Xanxus. I mean, I didn't exactly want to see Xanxus...boss of the Varia or not...but...well...knowing that coming ring battles would most likely end badly for the Varia...well, I didn't know how to act.

My headache developed into a mother of all headaches. "Squalo. Knock me out," I muttered, gripping onto the armrest for support.

"What?"

"Headache. Just...I dunno, whack my temple. Pressure point. Whatever. I don't necessarily care..."

He grit his teeth, as if he couldn't decide what to do. "Fine. On the count of three. Ready? One."

WHACK.

_What the fuck happened to two and three?_ My vision blurred, and I slumped.

* * *

><p>Sitting up, I groaned, and fell back onto my pillow. Except...I missed and hit the bed post. "Ah fuck! Screw shitholes!"<p>

"I see your language hasn't improved much."

It took a while for me to remember. There weren't many sarcastic doctors at the Varia. "Lawson?"

"Hm...maybe a little improvement in memory," he mused, handing me a pair of glasses.

"What are these for?"

"Your eyes are worse. You're abusing your contact lenses. You're meant to, you know, actually take them out, every now and again."

I slipped on the glasses and frowned at the ghastly view of the medical room. "Why am I here?"

"Because you're unwell."

"...no crap? Why am I unwell?"

Lawson, folded his arms and leaned back in his chair. "Technically speaking...you were too hungry, saw the food, went into shock, and fainted."

"What about your thoughts?" I grumbled, pulling the blanket covers over my head. Too bright.

"I believe that...you're angsty."

I peeked. "Angsty? What the fuck is that? A disease?"

His 'really?' look was kinda degrading. "It's a puberty thing," he explained anyway. "Teenage angst."

"What about stress?" I asked, sighing. "Isn't stress a better word for it?"

"Well, not quite. Stress is when you feel frustrated. Angst is when you don't know what to do," Lawson concluded.

"So...it's like that moment when you have to choose between tortured to Justin Bieber or One Direction?"

"...no. More like when you can't choose which friend's side to take in an argument."

Angst, huh? "All right, how do you get rid of this...angst?"

"If you want a cure...go read a few of those teenage vampire novels," he considered. "Or you can do some relaxing exercises like yoga. Clear body, clear mind."

I took a minute to think. Whipping off the covers, I quickly dressed in the Varia uniform that had been neatly folded at the base of the bed. Screw the headache. Just because it felt like my head was going to explode, didn't mean it actually would. "By the way, how long have I been out?"

"Three days."

I froze. "_Three _days?!"

* * *

><p><em>Near the Varia dungeons...<em>

"You're taking that to the prisoner?" I questioned, pointing to the tray. The security guard looked at me funny. Stepping out of the shadows of the corridor, I looked expectantly for a reply.

"Uh...yeah. I'm meant to give the meals to the prisoner...?"

"Well, bro, let me get that for you. You go uh...take a hike."

"Um...I'm not sure if you're allowed to - "

Sighing, I coughed and stood up a little straighter. "My name is Serena di Squalo, I'm the Cavallone family's External Advisor, a Varia Officer and the Squalo's sister; I can think of twelve ways to kill you in less than a minute without leaving evidence without using my hands – and I'd really like that tray. Please."

The guy's expression did a one eighty as I took the tray with one hand. "O-Of course! What are your orders?"

"Go take a break," I smiled as nicely as I could, kicking open the door. "Uh...it's best you don't mention this to some people, yeah? Like, I dunno, anybody." He bowed rigidly (seriously, ninety degrees), and power walked away. If he ran, I would've probably chased after him yelling 'the Disciplinary Committee disapproves of running down corridors!'. Being back on home soil...it felt...different.

Walking into the cell, my unease dispersed. It was so much nicer than the one Bel had originally thrown me into. You know, since it'd been made completely out of metal. The Ninth's cell had _carpet_. And a table. I gasped. _He even has CHAIRS. _There wasn't a single camera or sensor in the entire room. Prison standards these days...*sigh*.

"Serena."

The Ninth looked...like his ordinary self. Setting the tray on the table, I sat at one side. "G'day. You look old."

"What have you done?" he growled, coming within striking distance. "This is _not_ what I ordered you to do."

Sighing, I buried my face in the palms of my hands and rubbed my eyes. "Ninth. I asked what you were willing to give up. Recall what you said. Though I would be lying if I said I didn't get any pleasure from this."

He sat down on the opposite side of the table. "So it's ended then?"

"...Unfortunately, it's still a journey."

"Not much of a climax."

"Climax? This is just the introduction." I pushed the tray of food towards him. It looked a lot more appetizing compared to the food on the plane. _Steak...potatoes...ratatouille...pudding..._"Allow me to explain. The Varia doesn't have both sides of the ring."

"I heard Squalo returned with Iemitsu's half of the rings."

"He did. But I switched Iemitsu's rings with fakes. Dino had the real set."

The Ninth studied my expression. "You bought Tsunayoshi's side time."

"They needed it." Giving in to temptation, I took his pudding. I mean - depriving an old man of dessert wasn't the worst thing I could do. And it'd been days since I ate. "The Cervello. I need to know. Are they a real...thing?"

From the Ninth's expression, dessert seemed to have a different value entirely. "They exist."

"Great. I need you to write fake orders." Before he could object, I interrupted with a rough cough. "There's an amazingly alluring torture room a few doors down that I really, really, _really_, want to give you a tour of - "

"...Well, let's get writing."

_Sigh. Why are they never uncooperative?_

It took almost two hours to organise formal documents for Iemitsu and the Cervello. By the end of it, we were both wary of each other. I massaged my temples as I stood up to leave.

"You were surprisingly well behaved today," the Ninth decided. "I might consider omitting your punishment."

"Don't kid yourself, old man," I muttered, gathering the sheets of paper. "After this is over, your flimsy punishments are going to be the least of my worries."

* * *

><p>Even on the other side of closed door, I could smell the alcohol. I took a deep breath as I swung open the door.<p>

CRASH.

"What the fuck was that for?!" I yelled, shaking the remnants of the shattered cup and tequila off my face. Xanxus' aura wasn't hard to dissect.

_Scum._

"Anything else you wish to comment on, 'Lord' Xanxus?"

_Get out of my sight._

I studied his face. "Fine." Turning on my heel, I stormed out of the room, bumping into Squalo.

"Oi Serena, I was looking for you."

"Well, you found me!" I motioned angrily, making way for the nearest window.

"VOI! Where the hell are you going?!"

"A walk!"

* * *

><p><em>Meanwhile, downstairs...<em>

"Go find her talk to her Bel," Lussuria pleaded, watching the blonde throw his knives at a dartboard.

Annoyed, Bel put his arms behind his head, sinking into a chair. "Why should I help the peasant?"

Lussuria pouted. "She's not taking any of my calls, and the rest of us have missions. And plus, it's dangerous for a girl to be out alone in the dark."

"If she won't talk to you, why would she talk to me?" Bel shot back, getting more and more irritated. "In the dark, I pity the dangerous person more than her. How the fuck am I meant know where the stupid peasant is?"

"You'll find her for sure. Because you two are so cute together~!"

"...die, homosexual."

* * *

><p>I hoped dying will flames didn't attract sniffer dogs. Now that I thought about it, mailing the Ninth's orders to Iemitsu was a pretty dodgy idea. But then again, I'd rather die than being caught handing them over to Iemitsu.<p>

_Tonight_,_ I'm going to need something strong... _Observing the bar that my mind had subconsciously taken me to, I decided to go in.

Bump.

The bottle of beer seemed to drop to the floor in slow motion. "The fuck is your problem?" I hissed, glaring at a man in front of me. Last I recalled, mafia bars hadn't been so crowded. Or maybe Hibari's thinking was starting to get to me.

"A pretty little lady like you shouldn't be saying such dirty words. Take them back, or I'll have to hurt you," he threatened, pulling out a knife.

Ha. What a joke. I felt sorry for him, so I stepped around him.

"Oi bitch! I'm talking to you!"

Turning around, I saw his hand reach towards me. Suppressing a sigh, I grabbed his wrist, twisted it, yanked up and swung him into a wall. It was more instinct than on purpose. "Sorry. Charge the recuperation fee to the Varia."

"She's Varia! Everyone get her!"

...huh?

* * *

><p>There are times in life, where one must question their actions. However, it is inexplicably rare to actually find an answer. Belphegor found himself in one such inexplicable moment.<p>

Why exactly _was _he trying to look for dumbass? Did he enjoy picking on her? Her peasant like idiocy? Her annoying existence?

No, no, and no.

Wait. Of course he enjoyed picking on her. It was damn amusing. Because she was an idiotic peasant. Because she'd try to annoy him, and end up looking like an ever dumber dumbass. Bel wiped the smile off his face. Genius or not, it was too complex.

As he walked along the gloomy street (with his equally gloomy mood), a person flew out the door, crumpling in a heap at his feet. The door to the bar swung open once again, and he heard a shout. A very familiar shout.

"Fuck you! Fuck the Varia! Ça ne va pas!"

Huh. Finding her was always easy. Stepping over a pile of twitching bodies, Bel stepped inside the bar. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...isn't it rare to see you go a little wild, isn't it, dumbass?"

Serena stopped a punch at the bartender and glared. "Lussuria, wasn't it?"

"I happened to bump into you."

"And Lussuria 'happened' to tell you to look for me, didn't he?"

"Shut up."

She opened her mouth to shoot back another snarky line, but Bel waved for her to be silent. Besides the occasional groan, the bar was suddenly silent. And then they heard it.

A siren.

"It's the cops! Scram!"

Sighing, Serena let go of the bartender, and glared at Bel. In a matter of seconds, they were the only people left in the room. "All right then, Bel. What are you here for then?"

He took a moment to consider. It was unmanly to admit to being indecisive, wasn't it? "I was looking for prostitutes. But looking at you turned me off, peasant."

"...You are one fucked up prince." He frowned at her distasteful expression, but managed not to snap.

The sirens neared and stopped right outside the bar. Someone started shouting something through a megaphone. "Hurry up and go back to HQ," he remarked. "I'm not screwed to clean up a bunch of cops today. You know what, peasant? I'm such a generous prince, that I'll actually escort you back, ~ushi shi shi shi~..."

Her normally idiotic demeanor disappeared in a flash. "Fuck off. Go find your bloody prostitute and leave me alone."

"Suit yourself, peasant," he grumbled, examining the damage around the bar. "Go learn some self control."

"Hell – I didn't start it! The just started attacking me for no reason whatsoever."

"We're in the Varia, peasant," Bel hissed, wishing she'd grow a brain. "It's a personal strength test, obviously."

She stormed for the back. "Whatever. You can think whatever your stupid phony prince mind wants."

"Oi peasant!"

"I am not a fucking _peasant_! So get that in your bloody perverted mind, right?!"

Bel clenched his teeth. He had never felt so...insulted. On second thoughts, he didn't even know what he was feeling. "How dare you say that to the prince," he hissed, drawing his knives. "I'll kill you."

She ignored him, and slammed the door in his face.

* * *

><p>The peasant didn't look it, but when she wanted to, she really could run.<p>

And once again, Bel was unsure of himself. He'd already murdered two women who'd remotely reminded him of the peasant. Rather violently, as a matter of fact. Bel stared at the dead woman's blood on his hands. For some reason, he was sure, that if he killed the peasant, the unease wouldn't disappear.

It took three more murders for him to track her down. She was waiting for him, sitting casually on the safety rail of an overpass. Her legs dangled casually over the side of the railing.

I thought about the number of sirens I'd heard that evening. "Let me guess. Four women?"

"Five."

"Go find your own overpass."

"I'm here to kill you."

I stood up, balancing on the railing. "Get a move on. The Varia kills the weak, remember?"

But he just stood there. For ages. Eventually, he put away his knives. Slow decision, much. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...it's no fun if you don't fight back."

Taking a few steps towards him, I was about to figure out what was with his bloody mood swings, except...I accidentally stepped on my own shoelaces, and lost my balance on the railing. It took a moment for the truth to settle in. As I fell backwards, I subconsciously reached out. _Ah shit...!_

YANK.

Wait. I wasn't falling any more. Did my clothes snag on something? I looked up, and gaped.

Bel. Was. Touching. My. Hand.

Never, NEVER, did Bel and I hold hands/help/have contact with each other. People might've gotten the wrong idea. Of course, there'd been the exception every now and again, but now he was doing _all THREE at the same time_. NO LONGER AN EXCEPTION. "Aaaarrrrrgggghhh! Let go of me! I want to fall to my death!"

"Shut up dumbass!" He hauled me over the railing, and we ended up in a bundle. Instantly, I tried to put as much distance as I could from Bel as I could, but my wrist was acting up, and I ended up falling on him again. In a position that was too awkward. I tried to move.

And I realized I was stuck.

Bel punched my shoulder with his free hand. "Dumbass, how stupid can you get?!"

"Please remove your hand from my torso."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you're too heavy. I can't move."

"LIES, PERVERT."

* * *

><p>The sun was rising when we got back. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...I can't believe you were stupid enough to actually <em>eat <em>the cake, dumbass," Bel laughed, walking alongside me. He waited patiently as I limped and caught my breath.

You see, attempting to kick someone and failing is one thing.

_Failing_ to kick your target, getting your foot _jammed_ between the rungs of a _safety_ rail and spraining your _own_ ankle (eg. self harm) is another matter entirely.

"Have you seen this new hit video called 'I'm a fake prince' on YouTube?" I panted. "Well, guess who uploaded it."

"I'm a _real_ prince."

"Well, keep telling yourself that."

He cursed under his breath. "Oi dumbass, you're too slow. Just let me carry you."

"Too much contact for one day," I hissed, hobbling forward. My voice dropped a few tones. "And I thought I was too bloody _heavy_?!"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...hurry up dumbass."

"No one's fucking telling you to wait for me."

"Lussuria will bitch if I leave you alone."

"Since when did you give the shit?"

Ten minutes later, we turned up at the Varia front door. As Bel rung the doorbell, I leant on the door with one hand. "Alright. Neither of us will mention any of the events that have happened during the last twenty four hours until our deathbeds. Got it?"

But the door I was leaning on swung open, and I found myself falling to my right. Desperately trying to balance myself, I leant to the left, but misjudged how much weight my ankle could handle.

And so, I found myself tripping into Bel. Again.

"S-Sorry..." I stuttered, regaining my balance. And then I remembered that this was Bel. "I mean, *cough*, your fault for just standing there."

The Varia member from a lower rank cleared his throat. "Uh...I have an urgent message for Serena di Squalo."

But Bel ignored him as he whispered, creepily and quietly in my ear. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...do I mention this then, dumbass?"

"Um, I'm sorry, am I intruding something...?"

"No!" I blurted angrily, pushing him away. Bloody pervert. I straightened up, looking at the Varia member. "You said you had a message?"

"Um...yes. It's your mobile phone. It's been ringing for the past four days."

**You have:  
>47 missed calls from Dino Cavallone.<br>12 missed calls from Romario.  
>5 missed calls from Terry Luck.<br>2 missed calls from Kusakube.**

I sighed. Japan. Right. Without looking back at Bel, I nodded at the Varia member, and made my way to my room.

Apparently, Kusakube was just relaying a message from Hibari, who was too stubborn to use technology. Something about Hibari being angry that I'd left without signing proper school papers for leave, and that he'd bite me to death next he saw me. And Romario, like Kusakube, assisting Dino.

Terry...well...I was pretty sure she was just bored. She was calling on the behalf of her 'uncle', which was making me extremely annoyed. More or less, she was saying something like... 'I have this uncle, who might want to kill you, but I'm not telling you who, because I want to see the retarded expression on your face when you finally realize who it is'.

So I skyped Dino. _"SERENA."_

"Sup?" Maybe Dino was turning into Squalo. I ended up placing the laptop several feet further from me. Besides the volume, he looked like his cheerful self. A few band aids here and there though...

Suddenly, Terry appeared on the other end. "_Oi Serena, Cavallone won't tell me where you are. You're overseas, right?"_

"..." *Conversation bomb*.

Dino smiled weakly, looking apologetic. "_Your friend is pretty good at interrogating people...and she was enthusiastic about seeing you..."_

"_Friend? Who said anything about friend?"_ Terry murmured irritably._ "Acquaintance. A-C-Q-U-A-I-N-T-A-N-C-E. How hard is that to acknowledge?"_

"Well Dino, she was a spy," I sighed, burying my face in my hands. "I'm in Italy, Terry. Please stop interrogating one of my _friends_."

She shrugged. "My uncle was insistent that I should contact you. Don't blame me."

"That's it. Tell me who you're bloody uncle is," I grumbled. "He's not a stalker right?"

Dino cleared his throat. _"No, Serena, it's actually - "_

_"Shh! If you tell her, I'll castrate you!"_ Terry threatened, fighting the urge to burst into laughter.

I'll never forget the look that Dino had at that moment. It was half – 'I cannot believe you hang out with these people' and half 'I pity my future children'. _"Um...right. Serena, I've been trying to call you for days! Did something happen?"_

"No, apparently I'm really angsty, so I was unconscious for three days."

"..."

_"Man, Serena, that's kinda lame,"_ Terry commented, crossing her arms. _"No really, what's the truth? Did you go on a three day trip with some guy or something?"_

_The truth? Clearly, it's too boring for you._ I coughed. "Is there something you need?"

_"Did you know that you're a taboo with Kyoya?"_ Dino piped up. _"As soon as I mention you, and he tries to kill me."_

"...anything else?"

_"Italy sounds exciting. Didn't you see on the news? Apparently there's a Jack the Ripper copycat,"_ Terry remembered, snapping her fingers.

"Um...you see, I know the guy who did that. His alias is Prince the Ripper...so...um...yeah?"

She shook some hair from her face. _"Friends with a murderer. Wow. You either have a spine or lack a brain."_

"...I'm going to hang up now."

Dino called Romario to escort Terry out of the room. _"Wow. One blunt acquaintance you got there. Has Xanxus realized yet?"_

_Talk about being blunt. _"I dunno. I'm avoiding contact with him," I admitted. "I think I'll give it away if I spend too much time with him. How's Tsuna's group's progress?"

_"Um...it's good. They're not ready for the Varia, though. It's only been what – five days?"_

"Great."

_"Tsuna's been asking about you lately. Are you going to break the news about your allegiance to the Varia?"_

I hesitated. "He'll figure it out eventually."

_"And have you decided who you'll side with?"_

Pausing, I sighed. "You see, that's where the angst came in."

* * *

><p>The remainder of the day passed without any major event. Well, that was until the event actually happened. I spent the majority of the day sitting in the corner of my room, in a state that wasn't quite conscious or unconscious. You see, I was tired, but I didn't want to face my nightmares. Lately, they'd been more vivid than usual.<p>

"There's no way in hell I'd kill Dino," I suddenly said out-loud to myself, just to prove the point. "And there's no way in hell I'd kill Squalo."

And similarly, it wasn't like I could kill Hibari or Bel. (Not because we were acquaintances. God no.)

It was like...that ultimate question. If there was a burning fire, and you could only save one of them, who would you save? Truth was, if I couldn't save both of them, I'd let both of them burn. And probably commit suicide afterwards.

Which...brought me back to ground zero.

"BOSS REQUESTS AN AUDIENCE!" The voice was unnecessarily loud.

I turned to look at a member of Levi's lightning force thing. The guy was out of breath. "What?"

"Um...the Boss wishes to speak with you," he repeated nervously, eyeing the handgun (in which I was subconsciously pointing at him). Reflex, I swear.

Studying my watch, I raised an eyebrow. "It's midnight. He really wants to talk to me at _midnight_."

"Um...yes. He's in the meeting room."

"Thank you for informing me." Ignoring the urge to swear violently, I slotted the firearm onto my belt. Upon arrival at the room, I mentally prepared myself for whatever was going to happen.

_*Half an hour later*..._

"Uh...are you going to go in now?" the guy asked, standing awkwardly beside me. I was still standing in front of the door.

My eyes snapped open. "I'm not mentally prepared yet."

"It's been half an hour..."

"My mind has not reached the state of an imaginary 'happy place'."

"..."

"Oh what the fuck." I pushed open the door. "Yo. What up?"

Wait. Did I just say 'what up?' to XANXUS? _And THIS, is why I need to be mentally prepared._

"The rings. You knew they were fake."

"...Yeah?"

A chair flew into my face.

I reeled back in pain, cursing my bloody nose. "FUCK. FUCK. JUST – FUCK."

He acknowledged the other guy who'd been standing there. "Go get the trash-shark."

Cursing a little more, I drew up a chair furthest away from Xanxus. Moments later, Squalo came barging in without noticing me. "VOI! Did you call me Boss?"

Xanxus slammed Squalo's face into the table. I was suddenly glad that I got the chair.

"W-What the fuck?!"

"These are fakes."

"Fakes?"

Xanxus glared at me, and I flinched. "Iemitsu..." He stood up, taking apart and crushing the left half of the ring. "We're heading to Japan. And we will exterminate them."

* * *

><p>Wonderful. Now I can add 'stealing the Ninth's private jet' onto my recent list of crimes. On the other hand, I could add 'single handedly successfully flying from Italy to Japan' to my list of personal achievements. I studied the physics and engineering of flying at Mafia High; I'd really only flown a plane a handful of times, but there was autopilot.<p>

As soon as I landed, Levi and Mammon went to track down the ring of Lightning. As Xanxus, Bel, Mammon, Gola Mosca (which I knew creepily had the Ninth inside) and Lussuria exited the plane. I swore I saw someone from CEDEF watching casually. Quickly, I pulled Squalo to the side.

*Deep breath* "Squalo, I...I can't..."

He put a hand on my shoulder. "It's alright if you don't team up with the Varia."

"-can't...can't just - "

"Yes you can. Think Barack Obama." Squalo looked me straight in the eye. "This is still a long shot. So if it doesn't work, you're not suffering for it again. Don't interfere."

"I dunno...I mean..."

"Okay?" he asked forcefully.

Clenching my teeth, I shook my head. "No. I'm doing it."

* * *

><p>"Three seconds. I'll cut you to pieces in three seconds!" Squalo laughed, slashing his sword.<p>

Tsuna panicked. And then he saw me. His eyes widened.

"Serena...you're...you're Varia?"

I swallowed my guilty feelings, and whipped out a gun at him. Might as well join in with the theatrics. "Die, Sawada Tsunayoshi."

* * *

><p><strong>Omake<strong>

"So...you and your brother get along really well?" Terry asked, curious, as I looked at my dripping ice cream cone.

"Huh? I suppose."

"I don't think I've ever seen you guys argue," she speculated. "You guys are like what – perfect siblings."

I sighed. "There was this one time when I hated him."

"When he joined the Varia?"

Shaking my head, I stared off into the distance.

* * *

><p>You see, I'd been about five at the time. Not a very proud year. I'd been total wreck from top to bottom. Weak, stupid and naïve. One day, at school, just as I was about to confront Squalo, I saw a bunch of high school-ers walk in his direction. Hiding behind a wall, I smiled. Squalo was totally going to beat the shit out of them.<p>

"Oi, kid, I hear you can put up a good fight," the leader of the group gloated, taking a step forward, casting a shadow of the table.

Squalo looked up from his book. "Voi. Do you mind?" He shifted his position.

Clearly, the leader of the group didn't like his pride being thrown away like trash by a significantly younger (and shorter) kid. "Hey! Don't you have a little sister? Serena or some shit? If you don't answer me, I'm gonna go get her!"

I took a sharp breath, and flattened myself onto the wall. But temptation washed over me, and I peeked again.

There was a sigh and Squalo gently took the boy's hand – and slammed him into a nearby tree. His friends looked fearful and ran. "I don't get where you come up with this shit, but I don't have a fucking sister, asshole. You probably just met some weak-assed bitch."

*SHATTERS*

* * *

><p>Squalo only noticed something was off when he was in the midst of doing his homework. Something...was missing. Standing up and stretching, it took three minutes for him to notice, that Serena wasn't lounging on his bed reading. Walking to her room, he was surprised to find her glaring in her sleep. Well, frowning, anyway. ...The sun hadn't even set.<p>

So he considered the possibilities. Maybe she was being bullied? Bad day at school? Friendship troubles? But all those factors didn't seem to add up. And the following morning, he was still in deep thought, standing beside her bed as she woke up, saw his face, glared and ignored him.

It was him. Definitely.

For breakfast and the entire car trip to school, he tried to talk to her. She either ignored him, or threw some weird line back at him. Finally, when they arrived at school, they were in the midst of a heated argument.

"Well well well, if it isn't the runt from yesterday," the delinquent from the previous day chuckled, holding a butterfly knife. "I'll teach you not to mess with me!"

Squalo ignored him, and ducked down to Serena's level. "Look, if you don't tell me what's wrong, how the hell am I meant to say sorry?!"

"Ha! So she _is_ your sister, isn't she?" the boy continued, clearly doing his best to keep his embarrassment out of focus. He grabbed her arm and dragged her away from Squalo.

Serena glared at the boy and yelled in his ear. "No, I'm just some weak-assed bitch. Didn't you hear?"

And all of a sudden, the playground went silent. Squalo's dark aura was overwhelming. "You're kidding." Serena shook her head innocently. "VOI! I TOLD THE BASTARD THAT SO HE WOULDN'T BOTHER YOU, DUMBASS! ARE YOU SERIOUSLY TELLING ME A LOST A NIGHT'S SLEEP FOR _THIS_?!" Squalo ranted. She nodded. Resisting the urge to kill, he grabbed the delinquent holding onto Serena, kneed him in the gut.

Forcefully, he grabbed Serena by the arm and looked around the people watching in dead silence. "EVERY FUCKING PERSON HERE, GOD DAMN PAY ATTENTION. THIS KID, IS MY LITTLE SISTER, YOU GOT THAT? YOU MESS WITH HER, AND I'LL FUCKING GUT YOU!"

* * *

><p>"Oi Serena, care to share your cute little memory?" Terry questioned, snapping her fingers in my face.<p>

"Hm? Nah, nothing special," I grinned. "You'd have to be there to really get it."

* * *

><p><strong>Too many issues in this chapter to mention =_=<strong>

**By the way, I helped Falcone Kaerva write a HibariXOC fanfic called 'The Things I Hate About You'. I didn't end up writing much of it though :P**

**And someone on deviantart apparently bothered to draw a picture of Terry. The image is called 'Terry-chan is sleepy' by Lock-the-Moon-Away.**

**Anyways, have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	24. When Life Gives You Lemons

** This chapter would be the result of hello-totoro-ninja who was pretty insistent :D**

**There's a poll for who you would like Serena to be paired with. Right now, Bel's winning...by quite a bit :P  
><strong>**And I realized, I never did this. Disclaimer: I do not own KHR. Clearly, it's too awesome.**

**Oh well, please enjoy :]**

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 24 - When Life Gives You Lemons<span>

**DAY 1**

Tsuna's hand wouldn't stop shaking. The sheer thought of Xanxus...terrified him. And still, STILL, Reborn forced him to go to school. Of all places, _school_. It wasn't like he needed to be reminded that despite all - he was still 'Dame-Tsuna'.

"Tsuna! Yo!" Yamamoto leant on his shoulder, appearing from thin air. "Ha ha, I couldn't sleep yesterday, so I figured I should go to school."

"Ya-Yamamoto!" Tsuna shrieked, mentally picturing Xanxus' face plastered on his friend's body. _So Yamamoto is nervous as well..._

"Man I'm so excited!"

"..." _I take that back…_

Yamamoto's expression turned serious. "It'll be alright. We're all in this together!"

"Obviously!"

_And here comes Gokudera..._

Gokudera was smoking and carrying some weirdo box. "No matter who it is, we'll win and get rid of them!"

Despite the urge to break down completely, Tsuna smiled. His hand...stopped shaking.

"By the way, do any of you know who the Mist guardian is?" Yamamoto questioned, seemingly using his brain for a one off rare occasion.

"That's right! He must be slacking off!" Gokudera concluded.

"There's *hic* antimony, arsenic, aluminum...something, *hic* and hydrogen and oxygen and nitrogen and...and...a green tree."

The three of them suddenly turned to see Serena staggering down a street perpendicular to them, clearly not noticing them. Tsuna swallowed. The events of the previous night had left him with too much doubt.

As his intuition kicked in, Tsuna broke into a run. "Serena! Wait up!"

You know, there was a point in life when I was introduced to the idea of a 'hit list' or 'vengeance list' or something. I thought the handful of names looked too lonely, so I instead attempted to visualise a list of those who would have me in their hit lists. Actually, they didn't fit in my notebook, and annoyingly, I had to buy another notebook. But that's not the point - once a name goes in, it's permanent.

So I was very surprised, when Sawada Tsunayoshi, the very person I'd pointed a firearm at the previous night, ran up to me with a smile on his face.

First thought: I'm dreaming. So I walked into a wall.

Result: It hurt. A lot.

Second thought: I'm probably a little drunk. He's actually trying to kill me.

_But he's stopped right in front of me, and he's smiling like an angel. _

Third thought: He's dreaming. So I punched him.

And...missed.

"Serena...um...I wanted to say sorry," Tsuna blurted quickly, as if he wanted to get the conversation over as soon as possible. It didn't take a genius to figure out why, as my second punch missed as well. Third time lucky, they say.

Gokudera ran up to us, scowling, "Serena! Juudaime, get away from her!"

"Tsuna!"

I fumbled for the same weapon I'd aimed at Tsuna and pointed it vaguely in their direction. With my free hand, I drew my sword an inch from Tsuna's neck. "You move, and he dies."

"Oi Serena, what the fuck do you think you're doing?!" Gokudera yelled.

"Ha ha, are you practicing for a play, Serena?"

I ignored them, and stared Tsuna in the eye. He didn't back down. Or blink, actually. "My surname isn't actually Knight. I'm actually a Varia Officer - before you ask, yes, that's a high rank. And I have instructions to kill you whenever I please."

Tsuna looked into my eyes. "You won't kill me."

I stareed blankly. "Excuse me?"

"I know you won't do it," he rephrased. "Because I don't believe you're a bad person."

"Tsuna - only dictators have more blood on their hands than me. I've massacred family after family! Bad? No, Tsuna, I'm an abomination?" I hissed, barely holding back a laugh. After all, when one has nothing left - what else can they do?

"You didn't shoot me last night." Before I could retort, he held up a hand. "You would've missed anyway, Serena."

_He...he knows?_

*flashback*

"_Die, Sawada Tsunayoshi."_

_Tsuna turned to Reborn. "HIIIIIIEEEEE! Serena? You're with the Varia?! HIE, WHO ARE YOU?!" _

_Reborn's expression turned grim._

_His student went on panicking. "Is she going to kill me? HIIIIIIEEEEE! Why? Why didn't anyone tell me about her?!"_

_Feeling the rising tension, I thought I'd shoot at him. Maybe the a a scratch of the ribs. No major arteries or organs. Or a finger or two - Tsuna didn't really need them. Squeezing my eyes shut, I pulled back the trigged. Click. Click. Click. _

_No bullets. _

_NO BULLETS AT A TIME LIKE THIS?_

_Immediately, I turned to Bel, one eye twitching. My face posed a question on its own._

"_~Ushi shi shi shi~...don't look at me," he grinned, flashing a row of bullets between his fingers. "I found these."_

_And then Xanxus arrived. And moments later, Iemitsu. Since both were having a stare down (with me inconveniently being smackbang between them), I excused myself hastily and went to the nearest bar. Sometime past midnight, Dino dropped in. "You know, drinking isn't very attractive."_

"_Shut up Dino. I'm not drunk."_

"_It's unhealthy."_

"_Being in the mafia is unhealthy."_

"_My health is fine."_

"_You're special. Happy?"_

_He sighed. "I came to say bye. Since the ring battles are at Namimori, I have to get Hibari out of here as soon as possible. If he sees a broken signpost or something, he'll bust a nut."_

"_On the road training?"_

"_...I like that. I had something among the lines of 'knock him out and shove him into a suitcase' in mind, you know?" He ordered himself a whisky. "__I knew the day would come when we'd be standing on opposite sides."_

_I couldn't think of anything to say._

"_You know, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade."_

"_I hate lemonade. When life gives me lemons, I'll just ask for a refund. Or limes. Much sweeter than lemons."_

_He sighed. Deeply._

_So I sighed too. __"Dino, if you had to choose between crap and crap, what would you choose?"_

"_Well, either way, I'd have to choose crap," he answered slowly, raising an eyebrow._

"_Two craps cancel out each other and give you shit. And shit happens."_

_"So you're staying neutral?"_

_...Holy shit, he actually understood that? "If Xanxus has a problem - Iemitsu can deal with it. And vice versa. Everyone ignores me. Problem solved."_

"_Good luck Serena," he grinned, ruffling my hair as he got up. "Wish me luck with Kyoya."_

_I rolled my eyes. "Yes, have a lifetime of happiness together."_

_"Tch...! You're mean!"_

_"I'm kidding. You don't need luck with Hibari; you should stock up on blood. And plus, I don't have any luck to spare."_

*end flashback*

"I know that the Varia is really important to you, Serena," Tsuna hesitated.

I ignored him for a moment, and tried to think about the best thing to do. Seconds ticked by, and I swayed unsteadily on my feet. The most intelligent reply I could think of was 'uh huh'.

"Um...are you drunk?"

"No. I'm just pretending to be." I let my arms drop, tucking the handgun in my pocket, and slotted the sword back into its sheath on my shoulder. "I'm not a guardian; this fight doesn't involve me. I won't kill you, but it doesn't mean I'll save you. And don't worry about your Mist guardian. They're settling in just fine."

"Oi! Who is it?!" Gokudera yelled.

I waved it off. Chrome and I had waited the early hours of dawn for Ken and Chikusa to arrive. If it wasn't for Mukuro showing up (I didn't see anything, but Chrome said it was an illusion), I would've died from the number of questions they asked.

Walking a few paces ahead I examined my hastily worn school uniform to recall that I had originally agreed to scout the school grounds to avoid Tsuna, since I figured he'd be training with Reborn.

_Well, that backfired._

* * *

><p>"Knight-kun, Sasagawa-san, are you paying attention?"<p>

Hearing my name, I sat up straighter, forgot that I was leaning in my chair, and faceplanted into my desk. Ouch. "I'm listening...sensei," I muttered loud enough.

"Oh really?" the teacher asked skeptically. "What's the answer the fifth question?"

"Huh?"

"Page twenty six of your textbook..." he sighed, shaking his head in disapproval.

Flipping to the right page, I blinked. "Um...the doppler effect is the apparent change in the frequency of a wave caused by relative motion between the source of the wave and the observer."

"Knight-kun. What class is this?"

"Science?" I asked hopefully.

"Detention."

"...But it's only midday. Detention always starts at four."

My teacher actually facepalmed.

So later that afternoon, I found myself cleaning the classroom with Ryohei. As I stood on a table to wipe the windows, I glanced behind my shoulder to see the aforementioned wreaking more havoc with a broom than I could've ever envisioned. Conversation between us had always been...non-existent. And after the events of the previous day, talking seemed beyond awkward. As he swung the broom around (well, maybe he was trying to filter air), I realised the table was unstable - to the extreme.

And this, sadly, was after I fell off.

Onto Ryohei and his broom.

Observing my wrist experience the entire visible spectrum, I muttered muffled apologies to Ryohei.

"Hey Serena, are you really in the Varia?"

I nodded.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU SPAR WITH ME TO THE EXTREME?"

"You're training's already done, right?" I said quickly in consolation. "With Colonello, yes?"

"Shishō [master] said I was ready," he grinned.

"Tch. He always said I was his worst student," I murmured, thinking about the horrible childhood memories – no - _scars _Colonello had single-handedly created.

"You were also shishō's student?" Ryohei asked, grin on his face. "That's extreme!"

"Ha ha...yeah. Totes." I paused, letting my memory of Lussuria take over. "Ryohei, the Varia doesn't always play fair. It's not like a boxing match. There are no rules."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because it's general knowledge."

He blinked. "Are you implying I'm an idiot?"

_Oh wow you used a big word! _"No, I'm implying that you're inexperienced with this whole mafia thing. But there's always a way to even out the playing field."

"You're making no sense to the extreme, Serena."

Screw it. I tried. And trying's all that matters.

* * *

><p>Lussuria was delighted. Why? Because I agreed to watch his match.<p>

Carefully eyeing Gola Mosca behind me, I couldn't help but feel annoyed. It's breathing was just so...infuriating. And I did not appreciate being squished with the bloody robot in a car. The fact that Ninth was inside made my skin crawl and mingle with ants.

As we arrived in Namimori, Bel sniggered. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...so this is the dump you've been going to, dumbass?"

"Involuntarily," I added, still pissed at him from the previous night.

I couldn't help but look around for Hibari, simply out of habit. I half expected to see him appear from every staircase, classroom, corner and nook and cranny of the school with his tonfas and go 'I'll bite you to death'. _Actually, it's been a while since I've heard that phrase..._

And so, we waited.

And when we were done waiting: we waited some more.

Eventually, voices sprang out from the front gate. I recognized the aura of one of Yamamoto, Gokudera and Ryohei's heated discussions. Something about chicken tasting better fried, stir fried, or in soup.

"You _cannot_, be serious..." Levi muttered.

"VOI! I told you they were a bunch of kids," Squalo said triumphantly.

Shaking my head sadly, I put one hand on his shoulder. "No, that's not the point, Squalo. I think what Levi is trying to say is, who the FUCK likes chicken _soup_?! Fried, is just...bleurgh. Obviously, stir fry is way better!"

*Facepalm*

"Are they not here yet?" Yamamoto asked obliviously.

One of the two Cervello that had been standing quietly by the side spoke up. "They've been on standby for quite some time."

"Ah!"

Tsuna's face looked so shocked, I had a sudden impulse to shoot him. On second thoughts - I had no idea what the impulse was actually for. Shooting just seemed like a good idea.

The Cervello continued, and pointed at the East quad in unison. Creepy. Maybe they'd practised the move for hours. Or maybe they were telepathic cyborgs. Either option seemed highly possible. "Please look that way."

"That huge thing?!" Tsuna freaked, staring at the boxing ring.

"It cost a pretty penny," Bel mused whilst walking in the direction of the battle field. _...Bel, are you implying that ugly pennies exist too?_

Mammon's expression didn't change. "What a waste of money."

Arriving at the ring, Lussuria practically oozed adrenaline. The exact same rush he got when he tried to give me a haircut. He seemed to notice Xanxus' absence. "Is Boss here yet? It's my glorious moment on stage!"

"There's no way that man would be interested in another's fight," Squalo muttered, rolling his eyes. His eyes glinted. "Better yet, don't accept this pathetic battle and let me take them all! I'll cut them apart in five seconds!"

"Geez, you're so bloodthirsty..." I murmured somewhat miserably.

"VOI! Don't give me that face!"

"What face?"

"You're glaring!"

"No, I'm staring intently."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...there seems to be someone watching us, Mammon." Our conversation interrupted - we turned to see Reborn, who in turn, stared intently back at us.

"I know. He's not even a guardian. I'd like to get a spectator's fee from him."

I stood next to Bel, arms folded. "Well, Mammon, your mother probably told you this too many times, but money doesn't grow on - "

The Cervello called out loudly, interrupting rudely, "Guardians of the Sun, please come to the centre of the ring."

"I'm gonna go play!" Lussuria sang, waving.

"We'll be enjoying ourselves, Lussuria," Bel informed. Unsure what I should say, I just nodded as Squalo bellowed beside my ear for Lussuria to get it over with quickly.

Huh. And I wondered how I was half-deaf.

Without warning, the lights blasted on. Temporarily blinded by my cursed sensitive eyes, I reeled back, into Bel's open arms. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...watch where you're going, dumbass. I could've killed you."

"Go ahead." Cursing about self-pompous princes, I stepped away from him and whipped out a pair of silver aviators. Ryohei was getting beaten to a pulp, of course. It was more or less expected.

_This time I'm telling you, I'm telling you:  
>We, are never EVER EVER, getting back to – <em>

Squalo raised an eyebrow as I thrashed around my pockets to find my phone. "That your boyfriend?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...sounds like you two are close," Bel sniggered.

I shot them a 'WTF have you been smoking?' look as I picked up and walked a fair distance from them. "Terry Luck. What do you want?"

She yawned. _"I felt lonely. Can't I call a friend?"_

"I thought you didn't consider us friends," I stated flatly. "Not to mention, the last time we met, you threatened to castrate my best friend."

"_Well, that was over a video call. It doesn't count."_

"This is a phone call. It doesn't count."

"_So, what are you doing right now?" _she asked, upbeat._ "My uncle said it was something exciting. And sharing is caring."_

"Sharing isn't caring," I declared flatly. "If you must know, I'm watching a death match. If you really want to know more, call your bloody uncle. Since he seems to fucking know everything."

As I walked back to Squalo, he noted my furious expression with a small look of surprise. "What did he say?"

I elbowed him in the gut, and he didn't dodge in time.

"VOI! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?!"

Heaving a sigh, I stressed my words to get the message across. "Squalo. I. Don't. _Have_. A. _Boyfriend_. If I ever happen to get one, I swear, TO GOD, you'll be the first to know. Savvy?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...is he sexy?" Bel questioned, amused with the idea.

"I'll bet twenty bucks he's not," Levi snorted.

"What are you implying?" I asked darkly, doing well to pull out my sword and swing it casually.

"Well obviously, you're not much to look at," he replied, eyeing me from top to bottom. "I mean, that chest and - "

"THAT'S IT. I'M STANDING WITH THEM," I yelled angrily, marching off to Tsuna's group, forgetting to sheathe the sword. So I couldn't blame him when he saw me.

"HIIIIEEE!"

"Defend Juudaime!" Gokudera warned Yamamoto, dynamite at the ready.

Plopping onto the floor, I crossed my legs and attempted to meditate. Tsuna relaxed a great deal. Gokudera looked annoyed. Peeking at the ring, I saw that Ryohei was on the floor. Damn it. I'd missed the first part of the match.

"At this rate..." Tsuna muttered dejectedly.

"When we have nothing, we have faith. And faith is a good thing," I lectured, breathing in and out slowly.

"Stand up, kora!"

Kora. Why did that sound awfully familiar? And then it clicked. THE LEGEND OF KORRA. ANIMATED SERIES. Wait. Too many r's. There was something else. "Colonello?!" I hissed, snapping around so fast that my sunglasses ended up dangling from one ear.

"Eh? Colonello! What are you doing here?!" Apparently, I wasn't the only one who was surprised.

"It's about time," Colonello announced, ignoring the shocked faces and comments."Show him your true strength, Ryohei!"

"It's useless," Lussuria declared back confidently. "That boy is done for!"

"Master Colonello. I've been waiting for those words!"

And then, Ryohei got up oh-so-heroically. Sorry to be slightly cynical, but knowing more or less what was about to happen, I tuned out, and I warily followed the movement of a scuttling cockroach not too far away.

It was Lussuria's laugh that shook me out of my trance. Now THAT, was truly terrifying.

"Oho ho ho ho!" _What is this, the second coming of Santa? Bit early there. It's not even autumn yet. _"Don't make me laugh too hard. My abs are going to split even more!"

With a gasp, Ryohei looked genuinely surprised. "What?"

"What made me shiver was the blah of your blah, because blah di...blah...blah!" _Whoops. I almost fell asleep. _He smirked. "But I can do low-level things as that."

Lussuria swung in, missed Ryohei's neck by an inch, and glass from the lights shattered.

"He scraped turf-top's head and..."

"Did the same thing!"

_Since when did Gokudera and Tsuna think alike? Shock. _Reborn smirked in my direction. He was probably thinking the same thing. "No, it requires more technique than that. The pressure from his fists blew away the salt on Ryohei's body."

"Meaning he anticipated how Ryohei would dodge as well," I pointed out. "He's reading Ryohei like a kid's book."

Reborn didn't seem to notice the interruption. Or if he did, he didn't mind. "He is, indeed Varia quality."

"Mm hm!" Lussuria was obviously pleased by the compliment. Casting a gaze to the other members of the Varia, they looked pretty damn pleased with themselves as well.

"Varia quality? What is that?" Yamamoto questioned, confused. "Do you have Varia quality too, Serena?"

"Course not. I'm not that special," I passed off. Reborn motioned for me to explain. "The Varia is an assassin group who can supposedly do the impossible. And, well..."

"No matter who, when or where, these abilities used in assassination, the devil's work - people call these the Varia quality with fear and awe," Reborn finished, darkly.

"Um, you could say that. I was going more for 'skills that make them bat-shit crazy," I muttered.

Lussuria beamed. "As expected from Reborn. Well said! Do you understand now?" He gestured to Ryohei. "Between you and us, the difference in skill is so great that this is becoming a game, not a fight."

I pulled out my phone. Time to go back to tetris.

* * *

><p>That night, Tsuna couldn't sleep.<p>

Ryohei had won without catastrophic injuries - but then again, Lambo was next in line for battle. With some creepy old guy too. But no, the cause of his insomnia was Serena. It had been Ryohei's darkest hour; the destruction of the blinding lights had thrown them all in darkness, but as their eyes adjusted, the friend had been beaten to a pulp.

Yet Tsuna found his gaze subconsciously drifting to the tiny illuminated screen of Serena's phone. She herself was still wearing a cap and sunglasses, staring intently at the tiny tetris blocks. The whole 'Varia quality' discussion had been unnerving - Serena was undoubtedly dangerous - but if she had really wanted to do something to him, she would've already done so. So at least the Serena that sit beside him was no imposter to his memory.

Huh. She'd been there right from the beginning of his whole mafia fiasco. They didn't talk much, but he noticed her often..._there _- in his peripheral vision, outside the window, on the school roof, during class...hang on - she was seriously stalking him?!

Serena's attention seemed to be waning. Tsuna saw the neon blocks stack up in the centre, and the classic 'game over' popped up on her screen. Perhaps she was looking at Ryohei? Or was she asleep...? No, the phone crumbled in her grip like his mother's favorite vase.

And then he noticed it. His father had arrived. With Kyoko-chan and Basil-kun.

Did...did she know his father?

With the arrival of Kyoko, the match between Ryohei and Lussuria turned tables instantly - Tsuna found that he'd secretly doubted they would ever win against the group of assassins.

Lussuria, ruined knee and all, got up. "I'm not done yet!"

What tenacity..." he found himself muttering.

"That's not it." Tsuna was surprised to hear Serena's voice. As if on cue, there was a small explosion, and Lussuria toppled down for the last time. Gola Mosca was smoking. Well, his fingers were, quite literally. "Kill the weak."

"W-What?"

Reborn continued in her stead."That's one of the reasons why the Varia is one of the most feared organizations in the underground," he said distastefully. "Kill the weak. Lussuria was afraid."

Earlier, he noted how Serena had been so familiar with the Varia, so carefree. At that moment - the members of the Varia had exchanged excited grins.

And Serena sat alone, frowning.

_I wish I knew more..._

* * *

><p><strong>DAY 2<strong>

Mammon watched with a frown on his face. As smart as Serena could be, her intelligence certainly wasn't showing now. Gambling. Honestly. Poker was a fool's game. He could only watch, as Serena triumphantly slammed down a straight flush onto the low coffee table. Bel snickered, and gently put down a royal flush.

"The fuck?!" Serena complained, tousling her hair with both hands. "How can you win even when I'm _cheating_?!"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...because I'm a _prince_."

"Because you're a _retard_."

"Prince."

"Retard."

"PRINCE."

Serena hesitated a little. "_Fucking _retard."

The glared daggers at each other. Then Bel actually threw some of his daggers – but Serena kicked up the coffee table and used it as a shield. The cards on the table fluttered around in a chaotic mess.

Around the room, Squalo looked up warily from a new report, muttering dark words about 'children'. Xanxus paid no attention as he took another mouthful of tequila. As per usual, Gola Mosca stood in one corner, breathing heavily.

"Say, Bel, how much do you want to bet that Levi will win?" Serena continued, ducking behind a sofa as a torrent of knives missed her by inches. Again, Mammon frowned. Damages to the hotel would have to be paid for.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...it's so obvious, that there's no point," Bel decided. "But I say less than two minutes."

Serena made a Usain Bolt pose in front of the wall, and in a split-second, knives surrounded her figure. "And this is my family…" she muttered sadly to herself, catching her breath. "I say the kid will make it more than five. A thousand Euros sound fair?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you're on, dumbass."

Squalo stood up. "VOI! Are you two done already?!"

"No," Serena answered meekly. "I wanted to bet how much someone would have to pay you to get you to get a haircut."

"VOI! THAT'S NOT FUNNY SERENA!"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...it's hilarious, Squalo. Twenty thousand."

"VOI! SHUT THAT FUCKING HOLE ON YOUR FACE, YOU SHITTY BASTARD!"

Serena looked apologetic. "We're done now." But Mammon saw her mouth 'forty million' in Bel's direction.

"We're going now." Turning back look at Xanxus, he figured that the alcoholic wouldn't be interested. "Serena, you're staying here with him."

"What? Why?!" she demanded folding her arms. "I think you'd have to agree that you can't leave a teenage girl with a drunk!"

Squalo shot her a gruff look. "For your God damn information, you're already on the verge of being sick. There's no way in hell you're going out into that shitty rain weather."

Taking a seat on a not-so-ruined sofa, she sulked.

* * *

><p>I blew my nose violently. It might've been considered rude, had there not been a storm blocking out the noise. Squalo was right. I <em>was<em> on the verge of being sick. But Xanxus hadn't exactly given me much of a choice when he ordered me to drive him to Namimori Middle. It was his gun, or a cold.

Actually, I chose the gun, but he threw me in the car anyway.

"We have arrived, Xanxus-sama," I mocked, looking into the backseat.

He opened the door and stepped out into his imaginary rays of sunlight and rainbows. "Scum. Follow."

Doing my best to restrain my colorful language, I got out quickly, into the not-so-imaginary rain and slammed the door shut. Jogging in Xanxus' wake, it wasn't long before we made our way to the top of the roof. It seemed that Tsuna had just saved Lambo's life.

Without warning, he threw me into Tsuna.

Obviously, the fact that Tsuna was thirty feet away didn't matter to Xanxus. I ricocheted off him, and landed in a particularly deep puddle. By the time I'd realized that there was no hope in drying myself off, the charred remains of a Cervello came flying through the air. I suppose getting thrown by was better than being burnt to a crisp.

Up above, Xanxus smirked. "I haven't snapped. In fact, I'm amused."

"This is rare," Bel mused.

Mammon looked thoughtful. "How long has it been since we've seen the boss smile?"

"It's been eight years..." Levi answered automatically.

"No no, it's more like seven years and ten months," I corrected, clearly remembering the date of the coup d'état. After all, how can one learn from one's mistakes without remembering the past?

"Ha! With that foolish speech, I finally see why the old geezer was obsessed with you." Xanxus paused, probably for dramatic effect. I figured that the 'foolish speech' he was talking about was the one that Tsuna must've been babbling on about before you know, well, Xanxus FUCKING THREW ME INTO HIM. I AM NOT A ROCK. I AM A ROCK WITH _FEELINGS_.

Oh shit. That was probably angst talking.

Xanxus continued. "When I win this conflict, I will make you taste true despair...just like that old fool."

Iemitsu looked furious. "Xanxus! What did you do to the Ninth?!"

"Ha! It's your job to find that out, External Advisor. My subordinate will tell you nothing," he laughed, shooting me a look. The Varia snickered along with him.

My heart felt like I'd just jumped off the world's highest bridge.

The Cervello went on to announce the next battle – storm. As the Varia turned to leave, Squalo motioned for me to follow. But I shook my head, and pointed a finger behind my shoulder – at Reborn and Iemitsu, who were glari – no, staring _intently _at me.

Fun, I know.

* * *

><p>"What did you do to the Ninth?!" Iemitsu yelled again, shaking my shoulders vigorously.<p>

"Nothing," I replied flatly. _Well. Funny how I feel dizzy all of a sudden._ "I don't get it. Nana doesn't give a shit about how you come and go as you - "

*Shakes vigorously* "Where is he?!"

"I actually _don't _know."

"Tell me the truth!"

I sighed. "Question me, torture me, kill me – whatever your tiny mind can think up – but I'm still not going to answer your question. Got it?"

And finally, he shut up. Reborn seemed to dissect my facial features with his eyes. "Serena, you've met the Ninth, yes?"

"Yes."

"In the past ten days?"

"...Yes."

"Where did you meet him?" Iemitsu cut in, standing a little taller, just to emphasize the point that he was 'bigger' and 'stronger' than me.

"Now, where else would that sleazy old bastard sign a very important document?" I asked rhetorically. The unintended sarcasm helped. Well, it was coming in handy for once.

"Iemitsu, you need to go to Italy. I'm concerned about the Ninth," Reborn stated, coming to a conclusion.

"Thank you, Reborn. I'm leaving Tsuna and the rest in your care."

"Leave it to me. I know more about them than you."

I coughed. Because I actually felt the need to, for once. I pulled the collar of the Varia coat a little higher. Maybe I could still avoid a cold. "Well, I hate to interrupt your manly conversation, but I'm tired so I'm just gonna - "

"I apologize for being late, uncle!"

The new voice surprised me. And then I put the pieces together.

_Since when. Was. Iemitsu. TERRY'S UNCLE?_ Since when did Tsuna have a cousin? _Did I not stalk him enough?_ Maybe I'm hallucinating. _They don't even have the same blood type! _Suddenly, I realized, exactly how Tsuna felt when he found out that Iemitsu was in the mafia. I shouldn't have laughed.

Iemitsu seemed to notice my stupor. "It's all right, Terry. Just give Serena a hand while I'm gone."

She bowed. BOWED. "Of course, uncle. Are you going somewhere?"

"Italy."

_Breathe in. Breathe out. Think of happy things. Like stripping off Iemitsu's flesh and hacking him into pieces. Ah, yes, so relaxing. _"So, I assume I'm not going back to Italy?"

"No. Assist Tsuna's guardians," Iemitsu decided.

"Tch. Whatever floats your boat, bastard."

Terry kneed me in the gut, and I gasped, dropping to one knee. "Your manners are inexcusable, Serena. Show some respect to the External Advisor of the Vongola family."

I shot her a dirty look. "Oh, I'm so sorry, your _majesty_. My language was _inexcusable_, my lord. Would you like me hung, drawn and quartered? I assure you, it will please the crowd oh so very much!"

"Girls were burnt at the stake Serena. Get your facts straight," Terry lectured, quite enjoying herself.

* * *

><p><strong>DAY 3<strong>

_At Namimori Middle Infirmary..._

Gokudera drew his dynamite. "Oi! What do you want, Serena?" She held up a hand in defense and waved in her hyper friend.

Shamal peeked open an eye."Yo, good morning. Rough night?"

"Could say that," Serena replied curtly. Without asking, she crashed on a sick bed.

"Why the hell are you leisurely folding paper airplanes?" Serena's companion asked Gokudera, confused. He recalled her name being something like Terrance. "This last minute training doesn't seem very...last minute like. Are you trying to show off your 'awesome origami' skills? I bet these don't even fly that well." She picked one up and threw it out the window. A gust of wind caught it, and it dropped suddenly. "See?"

Clearly, Gokudera took offence. "Bitch! You're not the one who's doing the training, so shut up and get out of here!"

"Ah, just leave it Hayato," Shamal yawned. "At this rate, you'll never get a girl. And she has a good point. Why are you folding planes?"

"W-what? For training of course! You said we'd wrap it up!"

Bored with his pupil, Shamal lay back down on a bed. "Huh? I said we'd wrap it up because the effects of the training were already paying off."

"But I haven't been able to shoot down a single paper - "

*snicker*

Gokudera glared at Serena. "Is this funny to you?"

"Yes. It is."

"Why the hell are you even here?!" Gokudera raged. "Are you just here to make fun of me?!"

She coughed noisily in explanation. "Not necessarily. Thought you might like to know 'bout that retard prince."

"Who?!"

"Belphegor. Your opponent. Varia's Storm guardian. He just happens to have royal blood," Serena muttered, annoyed at having to take a breath every second word. "I'm not allowed to tell you too much about him – but he's creepy. If you want to beat him, for the love of God, kill him in one shot. His fighting style is a bit like yours, but more - "

"What does he use?" Terry piped up. "Blades? Guns? Explosives?"

Gokudera scowled. "Idiot! She can't tell you without killed by the Varia!"

Serena smiled wryly in thanks. "Um...something that is also thrown, comes in large numbers and hurts. He's pretty smart too."

"...I see."

"Do you really?"

"No."

"So why do you say that you have to get him in one shot?" Terry pondered, though I'd already attempted to explain the deep psychiatric issues Bel probably had stashed in him mind.

"His bloody 'princely instincts' won't let him lose."

Gokudera frowned. Princely instincts. It sure would suck to lose to that. "So. What are you here for then?"

"Give tips."

"What shit tips do you _have_ to give?"

"Think fast," Serena instructed, suppressing a yawn.

As soon as she had started speaking, Gokudera threw a bomb in her direction. "Ha! Think again."

Without a second thought, she slapped it lazily back in his direction. It exploded at his feet - thankfully, it hadn't had a lot of 'oomph'. "Think faster."

* * *

><p>My stomach grumbled loudly. "Did you have to bring popcorn?" I asked as my mouth watered. But since I'd lost half my voice, it came out more like, "Dude, popcorn!" You see, the point of resting when you're sick is so you don't lose your voice. Obviously, my body didn't understand the logic behind that.<p>

Terry misinterpreted and ran up a few steps on the staircase. "Oi. My popcorn. My uncle said it was entertaining. So I figured it would be a good idea."

It hadn't been easy to get used to the whole 'my uncle is actually Iemitsu, but we're not related by blood – did you know my other uncle is the boss of the Vongola family?' thing. In fact, it was downright creepy. 'You know, you'd fit right in with the Varia...' turned into "you'd fuck up the Varia".

I gave up, and took out my phone. Thankfully, Dino had been messing around on it, and he'd downloaded a text to speech app – 'read it'. Being a free app, some of the words came out a bit…wrong.

"Ah that's right, is Xanxus coming?" she asked, waiting for me to catch up to the base of the stairs.

"Shankzus? Thankfully, noh."

With a grimace, Terry ignored the awful pronunciations. "Damn, it's been a while since we met," she sighed, eating a few more kernels.

"Yu to no ea udder?"

"Yeah. We're cousins."

What the fuck?!

It made no sense whatsoever. In fact, it was impossible. Because that would make Xanxus and Tsuna cousins. No matter how you looked at it, Xanxus and Tsuna were two too different people. I forced myself to keep a straight face. "Your car sins? Oh. That's sweeet. Just like how you're car sins with sauna, white?"

"Of course not! That Tuna fellow of yours isn't my cousin, because we've never met," she pointed out. "Xanxus and I used to play Xbox together. I sucked too much though," she considered thoughtfully.

Xanxus playing Xbox. Holy shit. I see why – two x's.

We walked up the last step and turned to see both the Varia and Tsuna's group waiting raptly, staring at a clock. Before I could comment, Terry screamed. Hang on. Screamed is the wrong word. _Squaled_. Before I could grab onto her braid, she bolted to Bel and _knelt _in front of him.

Bel, on the other hand, was clearly enjoying the attention. Until...she opened her mouth.

"KYAAAAAAA! These combat boots are fucking awesome!"

*awkward silence*

Terry continued marveling at Bel's boots. "C'est très chic! And the bow is just OMG!" She looked up at Bel's face. "It's a shame the guy's not much to look at though. Obviously bleached his teeth too much. Probably got a mental disorder."

"..."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...care to repeat that again?" Bel asked icily, but I noticed that he wasn't taking out his knives. Lucky bastard.

"WHY don't you hang out with _these_ people, Terry?" I called louder, the yelling covering for the loss of voice. "Baka-Tsuna, she self- destructs." As I dragged her up and pushed her into Tsuna, Bel laughed creepily at my weak voice. "Make sure she doesn't do anything destructive," I corrected.

"But Serena...Gokudera still hasn't - "

"Have faith in the guy." _Because he's ACTUALLY my cousin._

The seconds on the clock began to tick away. Half a minute. Fifteen seconds. Five seconds. A few minutes out of sync with my watch. _Couple minutes - big deal! _Sadly, that was sarcasm. The fact became part of my endless pit of regrets.

And then, the clock exploded.

* * *

><p><strong>OMAKE: More Than Just A Nightmare<strong>

Normally, Squalo was not one to have dreams.

And he certainly was not one to have nightmares.

They were childish, extremely devious and gave one the need to take an expedition to the bathroom. So it certainly tainted his pride when he found himself screaming in his bed, early in the morning.

The nightmare was simple.

Lussuria had been there, squealing like a teenage girl, for some reason, whatever it was. The scene morphed into the inside of a church. Squalo frowned. He'd never been much of a religious man. The last time he'd stepped inside a church was when he assassinated a priest. A familiar song was playing in the background, but he couldn't quite put his finger on what its purpose was. The lyrics weren't quite processing in his brain. A funeral piece, perhaps?

_Here comes the...  
>All dressed in...<br>Sweetly, serenely in the..._

An arm looped around his own, and he realized he was standing at the foot of the aisle, dressed formally in a black suit and matching tie. All faces in the hall were turned in his direction. And with great horror, he realized that the arm around his belonged to none other, than Serena.

In a wedding dress.

Looking across the hall by the altar, his pulse quickened its pace by tenfold. He couldn't understand it. It just wasn't possible. _WHY THE FUCK IS HE EVEN -_

And _that's _when Squalo woke up screaming.

* * *

><p><strong>I apologize if the ring battles are slightly repetitive. <strong>

**Anyways, have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	25. Fishsticks

Chapter 25 - Fishsticks

"Sixteen squared!"

"Huh? T-two hundred and fifty six…"

Alexandra nodded, slurping her smoothie loudly. "All right. You're paying attention."

_I'm going to take a wild guess and say I'm asleep. Then where does she actually get all this food? Hang on a sec, is she trying to change the topic?! _"The fuck have you been?!" _  
><em>

She put up her hands hurriedly in defense. "Hey! I'm not the dumbass throwing away precious sleep."

"I don't have time to sleep!" I retorted, slightly ticked off. It wasn't like I was the one casually slurping on the smoothie.

"Oh yeah? You spent three hours last night waving a sword around!"

I clenched my fists defensively. "It's called _training_."

"Oh yes, this 'training' pays off oh, I don't know, when you fall asleep when some random assassin tries to kill you!"

Scowling, I looked away. "Well, the hell do you want now?"

"Does it kill to have a nice chat once in a while?"

"_Yes_."

"Oh whatever. I'll cut to the chase. You're being too obvious," she stated.

"Obvious," I repeated flatly. "Explain."

She paced back and forth, and I anticipated a lecture. "You're responsible for plot changes, no matter how major or minor. But people are starting to notice - 'oh look an issue! I bet Serena knows the answer!'. Subtlety! Take...Xanxus. You just flat out told him what he needed to do! When his insane domination plan doesn't work, who do you think is going to take the short of the stick?"

I coughed. "Well, you see, after the coup d'état, I kinda read his diary. The guy isn't _sane_. What shit has the guy been drinking?"

"Tequila," she replied, unentertained. "Xanxus is hot. Cut him some slack."

"...You are honestly _disturbing_."

"Oi! Don't talk to me with that tone. You've probably had at least one fantasy about...about Bel...or Dino – Hibari and Mukuro...and..."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP. DON'T GIVE YOUR SICK FANTISIES TO ME."

She gave me a disbelieving look. "Whatevs. I'll make the next point short. NO inteference of any kind to those matches. Especially Squalo's. Don't help him, don't get anyone else to help him, and for the love of God - don't tell him he's going to lose." By pulling out a pair of glasses, I suppose she was attempting to look more serious. But it just made her look like a receptionist – the flirty unintelligent type. "To be frank, the Cervello seem to hate you. Mess with anything - and that's just _begging _for their wrath."

"Well, just think about it," I snapped. "Right after Yamamoto wins, Squalo's face is just...planted into the water. And he's unconscious. Screw Yamamoto's mercy for using the blunt side a katana - he's going to drown anyway!"

"I'm sure it'll be fine. Have faith!" Her face lacked the same faith she preached.

"Who's brother is he - yours or mine?!" I yelled, putting forth the rhetorical question. "What exactly is stopping him from being eaten by a shark? God?! Ha! And Bel! Just about now – he's stuck in a room with a bomb, and you just expect him to magically _not _to be blown to smithereens?"

"Well...uh...it's rare to kill off popular characters in a story...but..."

"This isn't a story," I said coldly.

And I woke up, more stressed and tired prior to my nap. _She's as helpful as a manual in Yiddish.__  
><em>

Hibari's chair had been just as uncomfortable as I last remembered. Well actually, last I remembered, the chair was sitting on me – not that it made a difference. Bored, I rummaged through his desk for the hundredth time. I didn't know what I was trying to find – tonfas, dirty magazines, Hibird, a potato, love letters...but I gasped. As I did every other time I rummaged through his desk.

Paper. Shocking. What an interesting guy.

Checking my watch, I yawned. The storm battle, logically speaking, finished a few minutes ago. Slouching in the chair, I noticed a large portion of the ceiling had taken a permanent holiday. Ah, that's right. The Disciplinary Committee's room was on the second floor. _Seriously? I slept through that whole battle?_

Using the desk as leverage, I tumbled upwards through the ceiling's gap onto shattered glass. Gah. Damn. As I brushed out the larger fragments, a voice blasted out behind me.

"It is almost the promised time."

_Speakers? _There was an annoying high pitched whine, and it took me a second too long to realize – those weirdo wind turbines were exploding. Which...meant the match wasn't actually over.

_How even...?_ Then I remembered. My watch was fast.

Well. I didn't expect to ignore Alex's advice so soon.

Snapping back to the issues of the present, I dodged forward, noting my exit/entrance had been annihilated. It was easy to leave the building - windows, air ducts, etc. - but I found myself hesitating. _The Cervello hate me anyway. I've already trespassed. So...then...Bel... _

"God damn it!" I cursed, breaking into a sprint towards the end of the corridor - the library - vaguely aware of the explosions behind. Upon arrival, Gokudera was at the door of the library. I heard a beep.

Kicking Gokudera down the corridor, I skidded into the library in Bel's direction and knocked over a bookshelf onto the both of us – just as the turbine thing exploded. I could've sworn, Bel hugged me. Nevertheless, a word of thanks echoed in my mind to whoever decided to make the Varia coats fireproof. And that word of thanks immediately twisted into an array of swears.

"FUCK! SHIT. ARGH. JUST. ARGH. FUCKER. POTATO. NGH."

* * *

><p>I woke to the annoyed grunt of an unfamiliar doctor. Sitting up, I made sense of my bearings. Varia field hospital? Ah, of course. It was a room on the same floor as the Varia's penthouse, formerly known as the janitor's closet.<p>

Surprisingly, my injuries weren't...ghastly. I didn't have a single burn. The only damage I had was from the glass on my hands, and probably an odd bruise or two. That must've been one hell of a sturdy bookcase. Bel occupied the bed beside me - and I didn't need to know rocket science to realise...maybe...he'd...tried...

"Are all your senses okay?" the doctor interrupted, prodding me with a pen for attention. "Do you feel ready for service?"

My vocal cords were fucked up, so I shook my head instead.

The woman nodded, and took hold of my handgun on the bedside table, flicking the safety switchh. "In that case, Boss has ordered me to - "

Snatching the weapon from her hands, I stood up shakily, scowling. _Tell Xanxus he can shove his orders up his ass. _I walked up to Bel's bedside, slowly taking in the endless bandages on his unconscious figure. _Bloody prince. We're even now, savvy?_

"You okay?"

Squalo was at the door, arms folded, face somewhat neutral. I tried to throw a thumbs up, but it looked more like an awkward gesture. _I'm fucking brilliant. Don't worry. _Being siblings, a mutual understanding had formed from various motions and expressions. There was no need for words.

"I'm gonna go training then. I'll be back tomorrow morning. _Rest_," he stressed, jabbing his finger between my eyes forcefully.

_I know, I know..._

"By the way, you've got some sort of an acquaintance waiting for you downstairs. The boot weirdo," he remembered, getting in a lift going up. Which confused me. Up? Why would he – actually, it was probably better not knowing.

Feeling refreshed, I ran out of the hotel the Varia were stayng to find Terry, patiently waiting on a bench. "You look alive."

Frowning, I was about to pull out my phone for a reply, but she stopped me. "You know, I can lip-read."

"_You can WHAT?"_

"Lip-read. And for your information," she added thoughtfully, "you never asked, and you were amusing to watch. It helps that you're easy to read. You know, some people - they're like 'Heart of Darkness'. You? More like 'The Cat in the Hat'."

"_What do you want?_"

"I'm bored."

I sat down heavily beside her, staring up at the night sky. "_Say, Terry, do you have any family?" _

She shrugged, nodding in acceptance of the random question. "Actually, I'm an orphan. My parents sold me to some warlord. Went dumpster diving as soon as I could stand."

I blinked. How odd. Every one of my acquaintances had messed up families or some sort. Maybe I was cursed...? I slapped the negative thought away. _Oh well, never judge a girl by her cover. "Weren't you working for the French Secret Service?"_

"Pfft. I was adopted by this French guy when I was six. Turns out the guy was a spy. Luck, I guess."

"_But...but...you're the Ninth's sister's husband's niece...and Iemitsu and the Ninth are both...uncles..."_

"The French guy married the Ninth's sister – so I suppose that's my foster family. Bit like yours, but more...ordinary," she decided. "The relations are all over the place - too much paperwork. So technically, the Ninth is my uncle – and Xanxus is my cousin. Iemitsu is still part of the ninth generation, so he's also my uncle. And I'm their only niece."

Terry obviously didn't think any of this was a big deal. But to me, it was like...a once dirty secret revealed to be a squeaky clean fact. _"Let me guess. You're a suck up, and you enjoy it." _

She rolled her eyes. "First off, I've never had to kiss their shoes. And secondly, it's a façade, Serena. Duh. Look good in front of elders. Then laugh behind their backs. It's a spy thing," Terry shrugged. "Get used to it."

"_Yeah…but…it's dishonest to laugh behind their backs. Laughing in their faces feels so much better, you know?"_

"Except...laughing in their faces will get you tortured."

"..._It's totally worth it."_

* * *

><p><em>Later that day...<em>

"Here, I got you some milk," I muttered hoarsely, throwing Yamamoto a carton. _Oh how I've missed my ordinary voice._

"Ah, thanks Serena," he grinned, catching it with his free hand. Gently putting down his shinai, he plopped down. I sat down painfully beside him. The guy seriously took things too seriously. By sparring, I hoped he'd gain a little experience with an opponent other than his father. And well, I wasn't really supposed to hold a sword yet.

_My poor, poor hands... _Faking an anguished scream into a yawn, I focused on Yamamoto. "Take a break. Relax." I recoiled at the taste of milk. Why was it just so...milky? And...cow-like?

Yamamoto noticed. "Something wrong?"

"I hate milk."

"Ha ha, really? Why're you drinking it then?"

I looked grim. "When I was younger, I used to break a lot of bones. Actually, I still do. So Squalo always forced me to drink milk. So we made a deal. Drink milk, or one of Squalo's protein shakes."

He laughed again. "Were his protein shakes that bad?"

I shuddered. "All I know, is that he went to the butcher and only used a blender."

Which is why I drink milk. Voluntarily.

"You two sound really close..." he trailed off, staring absent-mindedly at his milk. "And when you talk about him, he doesn't sound like a bad guy."

Holy shit. I forgot. He didn't know. "Ah – no...he was more of...uh...a rival. He's uh...very nasty guy. Horrible. Despicable - I always hoped someone would teach him a lesson and smash his brains out," I brainstormed, coughing oh-so-inconspicuously. Thankfully, Yamamoto didn't seem to pick up on it.

* * *

><p>"Squalo, please!" I pleaded, jogging to keep up with his leisurely stroll.<p>

"VOI! I already told you, I'll slice that puny kid to pieces!" He stared dead ahead.

Gah. I'm not meant to do this._ But if I don't try, I'll regret this afterwards. _So I decided to give it another shot. "This is going to end badly. Just think about your pride!"

Squalo laughed. "VOI! You think I'm going to lose? The kid has what – two weeks of actual experience? Don't underestimate my pride as a swordsman, Serena."

Grabbing his elbow, I got him to stop. "Remember what our parents' will? Take pride in your actions, a man with honor, was it not? Tell me, where the fuck is the pride and honor in slashing an inexperienced kid to pieces?!"

He glared. "Don't talk to me about pride. You can't even deal with your own problems."

Perhaps I went too far. But I couldn't say I wasn't offended, in the least. I tried to soften my expression, and I let go of his arm. Siblings were born to argue. Both of us took no joy from it. "Squalo, he's not a bad kid - "

"Whatever!"

* * *

><p>Bel put an arm on Serena's shoulder and put his weight on her, grinning. Squalo lost? Now THAT, was a surprise. Serena didn't move a muscle. Literally. She'd stopped blinking and breathing, staring at her brother's death (on HD too) projected on the side of a building. He promptly dropped the smirk.<p>

"Oi dumbass, say something."

There was a significantly long pause. "Fishsticks."

_Fishsticks? _He came to a conclusion.

Serena had snapped.

"Squalo." Behind them, Xanxus laughed loudly, and all turned to stare. "Look at that! He lost! Trash!" His voice dropped several tones. "I'm done with you." Xanxus' hand lit up.

Levi, being the suck up he was, immediately spoke. "Boss, you don't need to raise a hand."

"Shall I?" Mammon joined in. "For a special fee."

Xanxus took a moment to consider. "Scum. Eliminate Squalo."

The Varia fell into silence. Xanxus only called one person 'scum'. There was a slight pause, and Serena started walking in the direction of the battlefield, stiffly.

"Serena, stop. Xanxus, you can't do this!" the Cavallone clotpole hissed, walking towards him.

Yawning, Xanxus reclined in his chair, answering without finding the need to look at him. "That scum is my subordinate. She is your equal. Know your place."

"I swear, if you do this, I _will _declare - "

"Dino. Stop." Hm? So the Arcobaleno finally spoke_._ "Leave it."

"Reborn! You can't - "

"It's her choice."

"Please wait!" A Cervello chick? Fool. "It's dangerous to enter the Aquarion – "

There was a slight glint as Serena broke into a sprint, and the foolish Cervello chick slowly crumpled. Serena was already a fair distance away when the body hit the floor. Turning back to the screen, Bel frowned. The baseball kid was carrying Squalo. A fin cut across the water. "What's with him?"

"He doesn't intend to save Squalo, does he?" Mammon murmured.

As they watched, a shark bumped into pillar that had been supporting the area the two had been standing on, and they dropped several feet. In range...now _this_ was starting to get interesting.

Squalo kicked Yamamoto away, and seconds later, was no longer visible. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...that's the end of that annoying Captain..." Bel mused cheerfully, though his mood wasn't quite so. As the shark submerged, there was a second splash.

Dumbass.

Tension rose among the small crowd. And after a minute, it began to fade. Bel considered. Serena could barely hold her breath for half a minute. Perhaps...?

She resurfaced. In the short amount of time, she'd lost her coat, sword and new set of teeth marks ran along her arm. Knowing her better than most, Bel waited for Squalo to burst through the still water. But he didn't. Instead, the water slowly turned scarlet, chunks of flesh bobbing in the water. Raw and bleeding, it was difficult to tell whose it once was.

Serena's face was downcast.

And Xanxus laughed. "Fish food at the very end! Ha ha ha! That piece of trash!"

The brat candidate gently tapped the CEDEF kid's shoulder. "Um...Basil-kun, do you know how close Serena is with Squalo?" His subordinate's worse the same confusion.

The CEDEF kid stared at him, shocked. "Squalo-san is her older brother."

"EH?!"

Bel looked back to the screen. Correction. Was.

* * *

><p><strong>DAY 5<strong>

"Knock knock."

"Fuck off Mukuro."

"You're meant to say 'who's there', assassin."

I sighed. The thing about voices in your head, is that you can't get rid of them by ignoring them. In fact, that only adds fuel to those damn ever-so-attention-needy voices. "Who's there?"

"Me. Who else?"

"STFU."

"Stuff me? Why would anyone want to stuff me?" he asked, feigning offence. "I assure you, I am far more entertaining than a stuffed animal, assassin."

"Get with the times; it stands for 'shut the fuck up'," I glared.

"...I knew that. I was testing you, ku fu fu fu..."

"Well, your acting deserves an Oscar."

Mukuro looked rather pleased with himself. "Hm? Really? What part did you like?"

"Your stupidity. Oh hang on. You weren't acting. My bad!" I muttered, irritated.

He huffed indignantly in response. "Well, obviously someone is going through _that_ time of the month. Am I correct?"

"Incorrect," I grumbled through gritted teeth. "Now if you don't mind, stop trying to understand female reproduction cycles and leave me alone."

The corner of his mouth twitched into a large smile, and the next second, he burst out into laughter. "Ku ha ha!" _Ku ha ha? Is that like a Mukuro Yamamoto hybrid laugh? Freaky. _"Don't kid yourself, assassin. Your mind is always a physical wreck. I doubt any amount time alone would repair that damage."

"Did you always talk this much?"

"Yes."

"No. You didn't. Good to see Chrome finally got through to you. Now you don't seem that gay," I murmured, enjoying the seething look on his face.

"Shame to see that you've become weak. A herbivore, as that skylark would've said."

"He's called me an herbivore from day one. I'm sure I was weak all along," I pointed out.

"Your brother isn't dead. Isn't that all you wanted in the first place?"

My eyes narrowed. "What makes you think he isn't?"

"Well, you haven't jumped off a building for starters," he shrugged casually. "Your mind's a wreck, but that doesn't mean it's complex."

"Your stupidity is overwhelming. Doesn't mean you're not a mentally deranged pervert."

Maybe Mukuro was a little upset. But he seemed to keep his act together. "Lancia. He's somewhere in Northern Italy at the moment. I need you to contact him, and get him to come to Japan."

I raised an eyebrow. "Northern Italy's a little vague, Mukuro. About 40 million people in that area. And if I recall correctly, last we met, I wasn't that interested in tasting bricks, cement, and reinforced concrete." For a moment, I recollected my memories. "Actually, right after that, you pushed me out of a window. It hurt, you know."

"You _jumped _out of the window," he corrected, irritation growing.

"You didn't stop me. That's the equivalent of pushing me out."

"Oh for crying out - ! We were _enemies_, assassin. Get real!" he spluttered.

Hang on. Something was wrong with that. "Were? I don't recall us ever getting to the 'friends' stage...I think you just appeared in my head, and assumed we were comrades..."

"Can you hurry it up, assassin? We have serious matters to discuss."

But I wasn't focusing on that. "- but friends also give hugs, and presents...and are supportive – nice, and - "

Mukuro groaned. Swiftly, he shoved a lollipop in my mouth, a book appeared in my hand, somehow changed the dull black background morphed into an empty meadow and wrapped his arms around me. Letting go quickly, he pointed at himself, "Hug," the lollipop, "present," the book, "support,"and then gestured at the park with both hands. "Nice."

I looked at the book's spine. _You. Are. Shitting. Me. Breaking Dawn?!_ It looked like it'd been read quite a few times too. The only thing I could seem to say was: "You smell like a wet dog, I hate the pineapples and you read crap like this?"

*Facepalm* "Just - ?!" He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Find Lancia. Get him to Namimori."

* * *

><p>Approximately a minute after Bel, Levi, Gola Mosca and Xanxus had left for the Mist battle, I snapped out of my depression. Immediately, I made my way to Nakayama Hospital. Bursting into Squalo's hospital room through the window, my face fell. The stench of antiseptic. The cluttered machines. The red. The white.<p>

I did this.

I put Squalo in this mess. I could blame the Ninth all I wanted, but at the end of the day, I was responsible.

"Serena!" Dino yelled, pulling me into the room before I could fall backwards and break my neck. A nurse standing by chided him to be more quiet. "It's okay," he insisted, pulling me into a hug.

I choked, and my voice that only just returned completely, cracked. "I-I'm so, so sorry...all this..."

"It's not your fault," he cut in. "You saved him."

"But..."

The door to the room slid open. "I _so _approve."

"You know, I thought she was with that other guy. Oh well. Both have decent fashion sense though. I approve too."

Dino and I parted, reaching for our weapons. "Bianchi! Terry! What the fuck is goin - "

The nurses shushed me, so I dragged Dino out of Squalo's hospital room, and motioned for the three of them to get in an empty room. I took a deep breath. "Squalo's dead. You didn't see anything."

They nodded slowly.

Bianchi glared at Dino. "What's going on here, Cavallone?"

"I'll explain later," I murmured. "What are you and Terry doing together?"

"I was looking for you," Terry shrugged. "I forgot how to get to Namimori Middle. Though...the battle's probably over by now. ARGH. I wanted to see those illusions!"

Seeing Terry distraught, Bianchi continued for her. "I was looking for you as well. Reborn and Tsuna have been acting strange lately - and Lambo's hospitalization was too coincidental."

"That is true..." Dino murmured in agreement. "Does anyone else find it fishy?"

"No. But if you interrupt again, this is going down your throat," Bianchi warned, pulling out a platter of poison cooking.

Terry stared at her, wide-eyed. "Way to go, sister." They high-fived.

Dino and I shared a look.

"Anyways," Bianchi cleared her throat, "I figured that Serena would be the easiest to interrogate. No offence."

I curtsied, despite the fact I wasn't wearing a skirt. "Offence taken."

"More or less, we bumped into each other. We realized that we were both looking for you, and bingo," Terry finished. "What were you two doing together, all over each other?" I opened my mouth to retaliate, but no words seemed to come out. Dino seemed to be going through the same dilemma.

* * *

><p>"Oi scum, your plan has a problem."<p>

Yawning, I rubbed my eyes. Did I fall asleep in the hotel the Varia were staying at? No one else seemed to be in the living room. "Those who know the truth about the coup d'état. About time you noticed. Got any ideas?"

"Frame the Sawada brat tomorrow. You can do it after the cloud battle."

"No. I refuse."

Xanxus' eyes flickered dangerously in a very Smeagol like fashion. "What did you say?"

"Did you know that Sawada's cloud guardian is easily tempted into battle?"

And out came the gun. "I don't give the jackshit about Sawada's guardians, scum."

I sighed. Deeply. I'd broken more or less every instruction that Alexandra Knight had been so keen to spew. So breaking another wouldn't exactly make too much of a difference. "Gola Mosca would probably annihilate Hibari Kyoya on full power. You'd win the ring battles, but the issue lies with crackpots in the upper echelon of the Vongola."

"It wouldn't be difficult to kill them all."

Shaking my head, I wondered how good Xanxus was at strategies. "It'd be too suspicious if they all just suddenly dropped dead. The majority of the people in the Vongola would just scram, leaving the desperate, and it'd be more or less a weak little family. Yeah?"

"I only want the Vongola at its strongest, scum."

"If Sawada was the one to severely injure the Ninth, who happens to be in the Gola Mosca suit, would it not be the perfect chance to showcase the victorious son who avenged his father?" I muttered. "Sawada can only intervene after the battle ends, only if his guardian wins."

"Mosca automatically goes on rampage after being knocked down."

I gave a mock salute. "Yes Sir. I believe you can figure out the rest. I won't be attending tomorrow night's match. Good luck, Xanxus."

"I don't need luck, scum."

"Well, having it won't hurt."

* * *

><p><strong>DAY 6 <strong>

"Lal Mirch? Sup?" I greeted, surprised. It was rare for her to call.

"_Serena, has Iemitsu been in touch with you in the past six hours?"_

Reclining on the couch, I frowned. "Iemitsu? No, the batard's on the other side of the globe. Why?"

"_He's missing."_

"Okay." Wait. WAIT. "WHAT?! YOU LOST IEMITSU?!"

"_We were infiltration the Vongola mansion. We were split up and for some reason, lost connection with him. He was looking for the Ninth. Do you have any idea where he might be?"_

I hesitated. Technically, I wasn't supposed to tell them anything about the fake Ninth. "Well, has the Ninth's emergency helicopter left yet?"

"_We destroyed it."_

"If you can't get in contact with him with technology, he's probably in deep. Basement, sewer deep. At least four or five floors down," I thought logically. "Though there is the possibility that he may've lost his receiver and they're just having tea."

"_This is Iemitsu we're talking about. Thank you for your cooperation."_

She hung up before I could say she wasn't that welcome. Sleep...finally.

Someone knocked on the door.

Only once, in the whole time since I'd moved to my living quarters in Japan, did someone knock on my house door. Actually, they rang the doorbell. And that was a messenger who didn't even show his face. People didn't just knock. There were no annoying salesmen, pranksters or milkmen. Mainly because my place was among a bunch of abandoned warehouses.

Nevertheless, I pulled out the sword from under the sofa, and walked up to the door. Opening the door quickly, I was about to –

Bel.

"Go away. What are you doing here?" I complained, sheathing the sword.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I was stalking you."

"Oh. Lovely. Scram."

His face lit up with a smirk. "Actually, I'm sleeping over."

"Noooo. I paid for that hotel - go sleep over there."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I have takeaway."

My stomach grumbled. Hey, a girl's gotta eat. "Hurry up and get in."

Being very, _very_ responsible teens, we didn't drink. Instead, we got high on sugar. And started playing tips. Not childish at all. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...you can't run or hide, dumbass," Bel almost sang, closing the distance. Damn it. The guy was hard to catch _and _outrun. Despite all that had happened, I found myself laughing almost maniacally, feeling more free than ever.

Looking back ahead, I rammed into a wall.

Wait.

Walls don't go 'I'll bite you to death'.

But...being high, Hibari wasn't much of a threat. "You're it!" I smirked, dodging a jab from Bel, rolling to my feet. A few knives flew over my head. "OI! BEL! We agreed! No weapons!"

Wait, if Bel actually wanted to hit me, the knives would've actually been closer. So that meant I wasn't the target.

Backtracking to see that Bel and Hibari had started a stare-down, I rolled my eyes. Before they started a fight, I ran between. I could see Dino in the distance, sprinting over. Ah, I see. So he'd been sparring with Hibari.

Being between two irresponsible guys that pissed me off to the point of spontaneous combustion, I wasn't exactly thrilled. The sugar rush died completely. Don't get me wrong, I would've loved to watch them fight. And irresponsibly put up bets. But...that would've just been wrong.

"Get out of the way, herbivore."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I'm taking this one, dumbass."

"Guardians can't battle, dimwits!" I hollered. "Bel – Hibari's a maniac. Hibari – Bel's a maniac and a genius."

Hibari glared. "Are you suggesting that that herbivore is stronger than me?"

"No! He's still a maniac," I tried to reassure.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...are you saying that I'd lose against that peasant?" Bel frowned. "How much do you want to bet?"

"Girls girls - you're both pretty, no need for this to get messy," I insisted firmly, staying between the two.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...dumbass is my toy," Bel declared, putting a hand around my waist and dragging me closer to him. "Get that into your head, peasant. Listen to the _genius_."

Quickly, I tried to push him away from me. "Let go of me Bel!" To my surprise, Hibari grabbed my other arm and yanked me in his direction.

"The herbivore is my subordinate. Keep your hands off her."

Though dislocating my elbow in the process was just mean. Then again, he could argue that it was accidental. In pain, I fell to the floor, writhing. "FUCKING ASSHOLE! SHITFACE. NGH. What the hell is wrong with you people?!"

"Oi oi, see what you've done?" Bel hissed, a handful of knives appearing in his hands.

"You dare blame me?" Hibari growled. "I'll bite you to death!"

Dino finally reached us. "Hibari! Don't you want to fight Mukuro? Belphegor! What would Xanxus say?"

Both hesitated, but remained in position. Left without much of a choice, I pulled out my pistol and shot both of them. Tranquilizer darts, unfortunately. Looking drunk for a moment, they both hit the floor, unconscious. Cradling my arm, I sat up breathing heavily. "Don't worry, they'll wake up in three hours with a hangover," I explained to a surprised Dino.

"How did you get here...?"

"Sugar rush."

"...What."

* * *

><p>"Mukuro, I found Lancia. He should be here tomorrow."<p>

It was faint, but he replied. "About time, assassin. Anything else you wish to discuss?"

"Congrats. You won."

"Obviously."

I coughed. "I started reading 'Breaking Dawn'. It doesn't make any sense, and I find it disturbing."

"Ku fu fu fu fu...I have another suggestion. A friend from another realm wrote it, but I assume it should be in this world soon. The battle was long; I bid you a good night, assassin." He disappeared. Glancing at the book that popped up into my hands, I blinked.

Fifty Shades of Grey.

_Maybe I should get Lussuria to read it first...but considering the fact that Lussuria thought Breaking Dawn was revolutional...Hibari? He likes to read, right? Urgh. No one else I know actually reads for leisure. It'll have to do. But...I need to get him to owe me first..._

* * *

><p>"Serena...Serena!"<p>

I woke up hastily, head banging Squalo's hospital bed. Annoyed, I saw Dino smiling cheesily and apologizing at the same time. A bunch of his subordinates were around him now. "Hm? What do you guys want? Did something happen?"

"Can you watch Hibari's match for me?" he asked, shooting his subordinates a dark look.

"Huh? Can't you go yourself?" I retorted groggily, standing up. My elbow still felt awful, courtesy of one very special prefect.

"Hibari might get distracted if I were there," he shrugged. "And since my men think that he might lose *stares incredulously* I'd feel better knowing you're there."

"Um...I wasn't really planning to go..."

He became very interested in his fingernails. "Did you know, fingernails grow slower after the age of twenty?"

"I got it! I'm leaving," I insisted, putting on my coat as I left the room and made my way for the stairs. Dino knew I hated people talking about pointless facts. It was a waste of brain space, and for some reason, it was permanent.

The walk to Namimori Middle lonely and miserable. The shadows were playing tricks on my eyes – and maybe I was just slightly paranoid of the dark. So my pace was...slow.

Hearing footsteps round the corner, I ran around to confront them, already in a defensive stance. "Who goes there?!"

"S-Serena!" Shoichi gasped, taking a few steps back.

Terry, who was beside him, snickered. "Who did you think we were? And 'who goes there'? What century is this?"

"It's pretty late," I coughed, cursing my paranoid behaviour.

"We just watched a movie," Shoichi explained. "I was walking her home."

"Gentleman, huh? What did you watch? A rom-com? Action? Horror? Thriller?" I guessed.

"A documentary," Terry said flatly. "Gawd woman, your imagination is just weird."

Oh. Lame. "Well, g'nite." We waved our goodbyes and went our separate ways.

Unfortunately due to delays, by the time of my arrival, the cloud match was already over. Hibari and Xanxus were brawling – well, Hibari was brawling, Xanxus was just casually dodging.

"Serena! What are you doing here?" Yamamoto exclaimed, running to me with Gokudera and Ryohei in tow.

"Dino told me to watch..." I murmured, wondering why he would ask. Was it wrong to spectate?

"Ha ha, they're really going all out….."

"Hibari is manly to the extreme!"

.._.I'm gonna forget that last line._ "I suppose you want me to stop them then?"

"If you don't mind," Gokudera coughed awkwardly, looking away.

While he wasn't focused on me, I reached into his jacket pockets to take out two dynamites. "I'm just gonna borrow these. Actually, I won't give them back," I reconsidered.

"Hey! What are you doing?!"

Choosing two adjacent Gatling guns, I sprinted to the area between them and stepped off the fence as leverage to get over. In the air, I threw the two dynamites away from me, so the two Gatling guns weren't facing me. Landing in a roll, I sprinted towards Hibari and Xanxus. But just before I reached them, Gola Mosca started powering up.

Condensed particle cannon. Extremely dangerous. And painful.

My left leg conveniently cramped and I tripped, knocking over Hibari. The cannon missed narrowly his waist, grazed his thigh, and singed my hair. I couldn't tell if Hibari's shock was a result of me or being shot.

Xanxus laughed. "Cervello. Because the cloud guardian refused to let me restrain Mosca, I lost control of him."

Missiles shot out of Gola Mosca, and I dragged Hibari out of the way, cursing at his weight. "Hibari! Oi!" I snapped my fingers in his face continuously.

He shook his head, and his eyes focused on me. His shock turned into anger. "Herbivore..."

"Tourniquet, tourniquet..." I chanted, patting my pockets. Finding a suitable piece of cloth, I double-knotted it just above his injury. It missed his femoral artery, the lucky bastard. Immediately after I tied the knot, another array of missiles came through the air. This time, Hibari was the one who noticed and pulled me away by my collar.

"Hurry up."

"Ah...thanks..." I muttered, twisting the loose ends of the knot to tighten it. His grip on my collar tightened significantly. "Sorry." Getting up, I saw Mosca was flying directly at us.

_That has GOT to be illegal. Oh wait. It is._

Whipping out my pistol, I shot out one of its eyes on my first try. Fortunately for me, like me, it wasn't used to operating with only one eye, and swerved away from us. Pulling Hibari's arm over my neck, we ran across the field. Hearing a beep, I looked behind my shoulder. _Chrome…! That's a mine…! _Ken and Chikusa pushed her instead into the path of a Gatling gun and Mosca.

And then Tsuna arrived. On time. I almost fainted in relief at that moment.

"It was this strong..." Hibari muttered, using his brain for once. I was beginning to think the guy was all brawn.

"Gola Mosca is virtually indestructible. It's still on its lowest level." Hibari was probably starting to feel degraded. "Well, it beats humans with strength, but it lacks resolve. Which is why it'll lose against Sawada."

Gola Mosca was down in less than a minute. It was kinda hard to act shocked when the Ninth tumbled out of the carnage. But it was still gut-wrenching to watch.

Filled with guilt, I nodded to Hibari and left him, moving towards the Ninth.

* * *

><p>Dino watched Serena sleep silently at Squalo's bedside, shifting restlessly. Yet it was then when she looked most peaceful. He just couldn't quite take his eyes off her figure.<p>

Squalo's heart rate monitor sped up a little, causing Dino to focus. "Have you come to, Squalo?"

He felt his former friend's eyes move in his direction. "Haneuma..."

Well. This was awkward. Dino was at a complete loss of words. _Former_ friends, emphasis on former. They hadn't exactly chatted for quite some time...and well...only knew vague stories of each other. With a tentative smile, Dino decided to be explanatory. "When Yamamoto fought you, I imagined that he would be in trouble, so I was ready to save him. But...I didn't think it would end like this."

Awkward. He shouldn't have said the last line. It made Squalo sound weak.

"Why did you save me? It would've been better to leave me be..." Squalo muttered gruffly with difficulty.

Dino laughed lightly. "Well, it'd be troublesome if you died on us now." He nodded in Serena's direction. "To be honest, she was the one who saved you. Completely annihilated that shark."

Squalo frowned in response. "You were always soft, Haneuma."

"Yeah probably."

Silence.

"You know, I was thinking. Maybe after the ring conflict, we can be friends again," Dino offered. "The three of us should go camping or something. Live the old days, stuff like that."

"Maybe."

Gah. This was just difficult. Conversation starters. Urgh. "So, how's the weather been lately?"

"We've been in the same place, Haneuma."

Great. Now he sounded mental. "I believe Tsuna is worthy of becoming Vongola Tenth. What about Xanxus drew you in? What does he have that makes you follow him, when all you care about is improving your swordsmanship, Squalo?"

Squalo was silent for a moment. "What did Serena say?"

"Uh...I think it was...because he had this raccoon tail around his neck or something..." Dino attempted. "Or maybe it was the feathers...she kinda said that fluffy thing he has so...how bad can a guy with a soft side be?"

Typical.

* * *

><p><strong>DAY 7<strong>

"And since I might not be here for a while, let's have a cram session," I decided. Screw Dino. Since when was he a 'oh, you have to go to school today because people might get suspicious and call the police and blow your cover' sorta guy? I found Tsuna staring, and looked away. "Anything you'd like to go through in particular?"

"Where have you been for the past two weeks?" Hana complained. "The sub taught us nothing!"

_That's not a topic. And I'm the sub. So your sub's sub taught you nothing. _"Yeah, but you guys are ahead anyways, so I doubt it matters," I pointed out. "You guys didn't even miss me."

"You said we'd make light up sparklers!" one of the guys piped up. "Right guys?" There were chants of agreement.

_Gosh, can't you just let me survive the next week first? _

* * *

><p>It was almost like an average day in Namimori. No ring battles, Varia, Xanxus, mafia. Actually, it felt...fake.<p>

I got to the roof moments before Tsuna did. I found a nice shady spot, and Reborn joined soon afterwards. "You're probably going to ask about the Ninth," I foretold, leaning on the building behind me. "Yes, I knew he was in Gola Mosca. In fact, the idea was mine."

"Why?"

"Xanxus wanted me to be the Varia's cloud guardian," I smiled wryly, redoing the bandages around my hands. "I'm not fit to be a guardian. And the Ninth was just...there. So it's my fault whichever way you look at it."

Reborn looked confused. "Being a guardian is a great honor. You have the skills. I don't understand," he said slowly.

"Nobody's asking you to."

We basked in silence for a while.

"Do you think Tsuna stands a chance against Xanxus?" Reborn asked seriously, out of the blue.

"Everyone stands a chance. It's just minuscule," I muttered, staring at the sky.

"Who's side are you on?"

"Whichever way it ends, Xanxus is going to want to kill me, Iemitsu will blow a vein screaming at me, and the Ninth is probably going to do something unspeakably horrible."

"Be more positive, Serena. You've helped Tsuna more than you know - the Ninth and Iemitsu might just turn a blind eye."

"That still leaves the Varia."

Crossing his arms, Reborn sounded like he was a difficult time comprehending something. "I don't get it. What exactly ties you to the Varia? You were forced to join. You hate your job."

I gave a tired smile. "Well, they more or less accepted me from day one. And although they're unorthodox, insane and bloodthirsty, they're the family that I needed then and now."

"Stockholm syndrome?"

"...Probably."

* * *

><p>Dumping my school bag on the floor, I sat down in the chair beside Squalo's hospital bed, letting out a deep breath. Starving, exhausted and stressed. Dino, who had been asleep, jumped awake. "Ah, Serena, I was getting worried!" He glanced at the clock on the wall. "What took you so long?"<p>

"Hibari made me count and measure every bloody window in Namimori Middle," I groaned in remembrance of the memory. "And afterwards, the Gagliardo family tried to kill me again. You were right. My cover's almost blown. I need to tell Iemitsu or the Ninth to get me out of this shithole..."

"I forgot to tell you..." Dino muttered, running a hand through his hair. "Uh...Iemitsu's stuck in the Vongola mansion, and he's been shot. The Ninth is still in intensive care so..."

Oh how the table have turned, bastards. But for some reason, the news didn't bring much joy. "Perfect. Well, if you don't hurry, you'll miss the battle," I warned, nodding at the clock. "It's the final hour."

"Nah, I'll stay and watch with you..." he insisted. "Pizza? It's cold now though..."

"Good enough." Taking the box, I got up and dragged him up. "Go. Don't worry, I'll watch Squalo tonight. You've only seen one of the matches," I ushered with a slice of pizza in my other hand.

Before any of us could argue any further, Bianchi burst into the room. "Cavallone! Serena! Lambo's gone!" she reported frantically. "Someone's taken him!"

Behind her, a Cervello chick stepped into the room. If I had a gun on me, I would've totally shot her. Unfortunately, an eighth of pizza isn't very effective. "All guardians have summons to the final battle."

It took me a moment to realize that she meant Squalo. "Wait! What? He's injured!"

Dino got a call, and his face paled. "Serena, it's the Ninth. They've taken him as well."

"W-what? Why?" I demanded, taking a step towards the Cervello. "He's not even a guardian!"

"He is the power source of Gola Mosca. Therefore he has been summoned as well."

"What is wrong with you? This is kidnapping!" I yelled, itching to throw a punch. "Get out!"

"That is not possible."

Swearing, I punched the wall. _Calm down. Inner peace. _Racking my brains, it didn't take long to find a solution. Dino seemed to have come to the same conclusion. "No, Serena - "

I ignored him, facing the Cervello woman. "I'll take their place. There is no rule that states you can't take up the duties of multiple guardians." I hated every word that came out of my mouth. But there was no other option.

She paused. "That is agreeable."

"Wha - ! Hang on Serena, I can't agree with this! You could be killed!" Dino interjected.

"The Ninth could be killed. Squalo could be killed," I retorted. "Bianchi. Keep an eye on everyone. They're all Varia targets."

"Be careful, Serena."

Dino just stared, frozen. With gritted teeth, I looked at the Cervello that had been standing there, emotionless the entire time. "Lead the way to hell, bitch."

* * *

><p><strong>OMAKE: Fishsticks<strong>

**A/N: Squalo's about 9 years old, Serena's about 3.**

"Squalo, what does 'fuck' mean?"

The hair on Squalo's neck stood up. "We went over this, Serena," he said all too sweetly. "The 'f' word is a very bad word."

"Okay. I'll ask Mom," she said thoughtfully, getting off his bed and heading for the door.

"Wait! I'll tell you!" Squalo yelled, jumping off his chair and closing the door. If she went to their mother...without a doubt, that woman would've told her the truth. Or worse - put the blame on him for swearing in front of her.

Serena smiled cheekily. "All right then, what does it mean?"

He hesitated. "When two soul-mates love each other very much...they say 'fuck you'," he explained briefly. "But if you tell that to anyone, they'd get very angry with you because you're not their soul-mate."

"...Really?"

"Yes."

"So what does 'wanker' mean?"

Oh hell. "VOI! Serena, how about this. I'll teach you a new word...that none of these words can compare to. It's so awesome, that...well, there's no other word to describe its...awesomeness," Squalo made up quickly. Urgh...the bullshit...

"Oh yeah? What is it?"

Sniffing the air, he said the first thing that came to mind. "Fishsticks."

"Fishsticks?" she repeated hesitantly. "It's that awesome?"

Squalo nodded and continued on his homework. He didn't think of their conversation much, until he realized Serena had gone into their father's office, directly across his room.

"What are you doing Dad?" he heard his sister ask curiously.

His father probably lifted her onto his lap. "You see this? I spent the last three days making it," he boasted proudly. "There's no way in hell your Mom's Valentine's Day present is going to be better than mine this year..."

"It's...a photo album."

"It's pretty, right?"

She looked at her father thoughtfully. "Can I write something on it?"

"Well...okay," he heard his father say hesitantly. About ten seconds later, Serena beamed.

"Did I spell it right?"

There was silence. "SUPERBI SQUALO! YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE, YOUNG MAN!"

Oh come on. What was it now? His mother called out that lunch was ready, and he quickly made a dash for the door, sadly a fraction of a second too slow. His father stormed into the room, photo album in hand. On the cover, it read 'to my beloved...fuck you.' Without meaning to, Squalo burst into laughter.

"DO YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY?! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TEACHING YOUR SISTER?"

"What was I supposed to say?!" he defended defiantly.

His father's voice turned icy. "And what did you tell her?"

"VOI! I can't remember! It was like...soul-mates who love each other," Squalo said quickly, inching out the door. His father caught him by the collar and sat him down on his bed.

"You're grounded."

"What?! Fuck! Come on, do you have a better explanation?!" he yelled angrily.

"Well..."

But Squalo was on a ranting roll. "VOI! When I was seven and I asked you what it meant, you locked me in a room with porn for five hours! Is that what you wanted me to do? Huh?!"

"Son, I've already told you, I'm sorry," his father said through gritted teeth. "I was drunk."

"That's no excuse!"

The door opened, and Serena burst into the room with a tray of fishsticks. "Hey Squalo, did you know that fishsticks have an earthly form? That's so cool!" she grinned, offering him one.

"Serena, Squalo and I were having a very important talk," their father cut in.

Their mother walked into the room, hands on her hips. "No food past the living room," she lectured.

"Oh Mom, Dad, what does porn mean?" she inquired, innocently chewing on a fishstick.

"...Well...uh..." Their mother looked around the room, murmuring incoherently. Her eyes found the photo album that was still in their father's hand. "What in the – we need to talk!" she growled, dragging their father out of the room.

The room was filled with silence. Squalo took a deep breath. "Nice one, Serena."

"Fishsticks. They're kinda...fishy..." she murmured, making a face.

"Yeah, the uh...earthly version's no good," Squalo lied, falling onto the bed. Honestly. This family was insane. "You remember what porn means, right?" he asked, just to be sure.

"It's a really awkward word because not many people know it, but it's a poisonous flower, right?"

He put a hand on her head. "Yup. Don't forget."

"Hey Squalo?"

"Hm?"

"If 'fishsticks' is a really awesome word, what does it actually mean?"

"I've got your back, and you've got mine."

Grinning, she threw a thumbs up. "Fishsticks!"

* * *

><p><strong>Well, have a nice day, ciao~ :]<strong>


	26. It Just Doesn't End

Chapter 26 - It Just Doesn't End

The Cervello whom I'd been following for the past half hour stopped outside Namimori Middle and handed me a watch. Or that's what it looked like, anyway.

"Well, are we gonna go in then?" I asked tentatively.

"Put on the wristband."

"Why?"

"It contains a neurotoxin called -"

I sneezed and missed the name. She didn't seem to be in the mood to repeat it.

"- triggered as soon as the match begins. In half an hour, if the Cloud, Rain and Sky ring have not been inserted into the space given, a second neurotoxin will be released and cause a chemical reaction. In ten more minutes, the damage to your body will be too far to reverse. And in another five minutes, your internal organs will be liquefied."

Was that a smile? Oh the heartless bitch. "Wonderful."

"Then please put on the wristband."

_Sarcasm. SARCASM. Do I have to spell that out? S-A-R-C-A- ...C-A-... Screw spelling. Auto-correct!_ I eyed the wristband anxiously. "Hang on, why do I have to get the Sky ring? I'm only temporarily replacing the Rain and Cloud guardians. At last count, the difference between three and two is...one. Don't want to insult your math or anything but..."

"For trespassing and interfering with the battle of the storm guardians, this is your punishment. Please put on the wristband."

With a sigh, I complied. So even if I didn't volunteer so heroically, I was screwed? Ah whatever. "What now?"

"Please go to the battlefield of the Cloud guardians."

Jogging, I arrived at the school's exercise grounds quicker than I would've liked. I waved at Hibari, who raised an eyebrow in my direction.

"Herbivore," he hissed. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, member change for that robot. Can't let the Ninth die or anything," I sighed. The Cervello were saying something about the rings being at the top of the poles. Hibari and I looked up. "Race you?"

"I'd rather remove the opposition."

"Uh huh. Logical."

"I'll bite you to death, herbi - "

He collapsed. I'd felt the slight pressure on my wrist as well. What I'd assumed: the neurotoxin or whatever wouldn't do much damage. In fact, I felt confident that it wouldn't. Which is why I was equally surprised as Hibari when I dropped onto the floor an inch from his face. My body felt...shaky. Not from anxiety, but from...muscle overuse. Whilst Hibari was sweating, I felt cold and twitched uncontrollably.

Beside me, Hibari was getting up. How he was doing that; I had no idea. But his resolution – no – _irritation_, was probably extremely high. _I'm not losing to this nutcase. _I got to my feet and tried to stay upright. "Two can play at the game, Hibari."

"I see." He stepped forward and lazily swung a tonfa at my head, and I squatted, dispirited. I suppose we looked like we were drunk, not that anyone was watching.

I'd squatted without thinking of the consequences. My knees wobbled from the sudden action, and I fell onto my butt. Hibari's foot looked awfully close, so I kicked him in the ankle, and he came crashing down as well. Back to ground zero. Apparently getting up was too annoying for him, since he sort of...crawled over in my direction with tonfas in his hands. Like a COD [Call of Duty] zombie. I took a moment to shiver. Well, leave it to Hibari to look creepy.

Swinging both tonfas simultaneously in an X motion (oh wow, I bet Xanxus would be interested), he aimed for my neck, but I'd already slid onto my back – so he hit the pole with full force. And with the extra momentum in his attack, he fell onto me.

"What're you lookin' at?" I muttered gruffly, winded with his extra weight. Both my hands were on his shoulders, trying to push him away. There was a loud groaning sound, and the structure holding the ring crashed down. On top of us. Thankfully, it wasn't made from something as dense as iron, but it was no light matter.

Suddenly, we were very close. It was literally, like an involuntary hug.

_Hey, I just met you,  
>And this is crazy,<br>But here's my number,  
><em>_So call me, maybe?_

Oh wonderful. Just perfect. It was almost as if the memory part of my brain wanted to watch me suffer. How very suitable for the awkward moment when Hibari-Kyoya-is-pinned-onto-you-like-a-pervert-and -you-can't-do-anything-because-he's-actually-fat.

"Move aside, herbivore."

"Oh I'm sorry. Have you weighed yourself lately?" I huffed, barely able to breathe.

"Weapons are not permitted in school grounds."

"...! Is this the fucking time for that?! I see a pair of very weapon like _tonfas _in your possession, you motherfucking hypocrite!"

"Such language is not permitted in Namimori Middle."

I could see the ring. But I couldn't reach it. On the other hand, Hibari couldn't see the ring, but it was within reach. "Hibari. Move your...left foot upwards like...like you're about to side kick me."

"Don't order me around, herbivore," he threatened.

"Would you rather prefer we stayed like this for the rest of the match?" I questioned sarcastically. "Choose wisely."

He kicked it. And me in the process.

_Cause aaaaaall I neeeeeeeed,  
>is a Beauty and a Beeeeeeeeat,<br>Who can make my life compleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeete_

"Shut up," I hissed, annoyed. Contorting my arm, I realized I wouldn't be able to reach my own wristband. Hibari's looked possible. Just.

"Excuse me?"

"I wasn't talking to you." I pressed the ring into his band.

As soon as he received the antidote, he was up and gone. The poles that had been weighing us down were mangled beyond recognition. I wasn't screwed to move. Using the ring, I sighed. Although I knew I didn't get the antidote, the mental thought of progress dulled the pain a little.

One down, two to go.

There was a faint buzzing sound, and I remembered the screen on the wristband. With all the close encounters with Hibari, I hadn't had time to focus on anything else. Lussuria's face was on. "Boss, please save me... I'll do anything."

Mammon's was next. "I won't lose ever again. I'll follow you for the rest of my life. I'll give you half of all the money I've saved." Shock. That avaricious baby was willing to give _that _much?

"Rings...I'll help you collect the rings..." Ha. That wasn't very cool of Bel.

"Please save me...and give me any command." Typical Levi.

But then my face was on the screen. I blinked. Was that a...a...tonfa mark? Oh fucking hell. That ruined my mood. "Don't expect something sappy from me," I huffed, and it switched back to a mid-shot of Xanxus.

* * *

><p>Bel slowed down. The tonfa guy wasn't even screwed to chase him. <em>Hm...with Squalo and Levi gone...I don't want to hear Lussuria's loud voice. But it wouldn't be bad to have Mammon or Serena owe me either...<em>

He made up his mind. Turning into the quad, he laughed.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...dumb_ass_."

She perked up at the sound of his voice. "Bel?" Among a list of inaudible curses, she complained about having to do a sit-up, but got to her feet anyway. "Well then, what brings you to my humble abode?"

He strolled towards her with his hands outstretched. "The Prince has come to save you. ~Ushi shi shi shi~...you should feel honored."

Giving him a deadpan look, she showed him the ring in her palm. "I already have the Cloud ring, though I feel so...honored?

Uncool. Lame. Now that he was closer to her, his mouth curled into a frown. "You smell like him."

"Him?"

"The ace."

Serena was still clueless. "Who?"

"You know who I'm talking about," Bel muttered through gritted teeth.

"You?"

*Facepalm*

* * *

><p>I beat Gokudera to the Sun ring. Getting the ring had been a complicated process of throwing rocks, but...now that I had the ring...should I give the antidote to Ryohei as well?<p>

But technically he was on the opposite side. But Ryohei would've given the antidote to Lussuria too. But then again, the Varia wasn't well known for its charity. But...three minutes ago, Xanxus literally said 'here's some charity, trash'.

God damn. What's with all the 'but's'.

Slipping out quietly, I helped Lussuria first, since it was a team battle. "Serena! About - "

"Shh!" I raised a finger to my lips desperately, but luckily, being loud had made Ryohei partially deaf or something. I bent down beside him and gave him the antidote, making sure he couldn't see me.

"W-who is it?" he stuttered, peeking open one eye.

Uh. Well. "I'll bite you to death if you die on school grounds, Sasagawa Ryohei," I mimicked as well as I could, but just hearing the words leave my mouth made me cringe. _Hibari's voice really is low, huh?_

But...Ryohei didn't seem to notice. "Hibari! Thanks!"

Seeing as Lussuria was confined to a bed, I ditched him and dashed into the bushes again – not a moment too soon. Gokudera came bustling onto the scene loaded with dynamite.

Anyways, I was meant to rendezvous with Bel and Mammon at the gym, right? _But...what should I do with Gokudera... _Trek through the bushes? I took a step forward, and there was a loud snap. Stupid branch. Such a cliché film moment.

"Who's there?!"

Think fast. Um. "Meow~!" I imitated, trying to remember what Nibbles used to do. Hang on. In great works of Japanese literature, cats always went...went... "NYA~!"

"Tch. Possum."

I felt so offended.

For a few minutes, I took a breather, trying to loosen my barely-existent muscles. Stealthily leaving the bushes, I arrived at the gym a little after Yamamoto and Gokudera, the latter being the slow-poke picking the lock.

"Hey Gokudera, are you alright? You don't look so good."

"Like you're one to talk. You've been holding your wound this whole time, and you look weakened."

"Ha ha! So we're both torn up."

"Geez..."

"Ohayo!" I yelled, and they both swiveled around at my voice. Stepping between them, I kicked open the doors inwards, busting the hinges. I wasn't paying the bill, after all. It was horribly bright inside the gym.

"S-Serena! What the hell are you doing here?!"

_The point of a rendezvous point is that it remains secret. _"I don't actually know. I felt lonely, and then I saw you two here," I sniffed, pretending to look tearful.

Yamamoto laughed. "Did you catch a cold, Serena?"

Offended. Absolutely offended.

Before I could argue back, a hand clasped onto my mouth from behind. By the time Gokudera and Yamamoto made the oh-so-difficult decision to go inside, I started glimpsing my dead parents. Gokudera and Yamamoto seemed to have totally forgotten about me. The hand let go, and I went into a gasping fit. And who was the mastermind who almost suffocated me?

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you're so weak, dumbass," Bel gloated, squatting down beside me.

"You don't say," I grumbled. "Where's Mammon?"

"On the roof. He's making illusions."

"Are you gonna give the antidote to their mist guardian?"

"Hm? Already did. Her breathing was too loud."

For the second time that night, I felt a slight tinge on my wrist. Was that the half hour mark? All of a sudden, I felt light headed. "Wow, you're secretly a really nice person, aren't you, Pu-ri-n-su?" I gasped, enjoying the look on his face. "Do you have secret nice 'bad guy' meetings with other people like you?"

He seemed to stare. But like always, I couldn't really tell for sure.

I sat down heavily. Or fell down. Same thing, really. "Did you know, I always though prince in Japanese was 'ojii' [grandfather]. But apparently it was 'ouji' [prince]. I was so, _so_ disappointed."

Bel's knives were out in a flash. "How can you be _disappointed_ that I'm not an old man?"

I flinched and buried my face in my arms. "Gramps, your knives are reflecting to much light from the moon."

"Do you want to _die_?"

I sighed. "No. I want an ice bath. But I couldn't find a seven eleven close enough to my place. Why, God? Why did you build that seven eleven so far? WHHHHHYYYYY?"

Bel's face resembled something pretty close to concern."Tch! You didn't get the antidote?! Why didn't you say something?"

"..."

It was like one of those 'I was _so_ drunk' memories. One moment you're spacing out, the next you find yourself in the middle of some dramatic event. In this case, I had the Vongola rings in my hands – and a recently melted Xanxus in front of me. Did I...? Probably. Exhausted, I slid down frog legged.

Xanxus' eyes turned in my direction. "Give me the rings."

"Of course," Bel cut in for me. He was twirling the sky ring with one of his knives. "This is only worthy of the Ninth's direct relation, not that imposter." Imposter? Did he mean Tsuna? That was a bit harsh then. At last count, Tsuna didn't even _want _to be the Vongola Tenth.

And now that I thought about it, maybe Xanxus did have some relation to the Ninth. Mammon babbled on about the great secrets of the Vongola family and stuck the rings on a chain one at a time. Tsuna's guardians appeared on the scene. I was more focused on my own suspicions. _Logically speaking, Xanxus does have a dying will flame. The Ninth's line was directly descended from the Second, so...that probably meant the Second had some relation to the First as well. _

How else could flames spread?

_Then what if Xanxus is from an illegitimate line, like Iemitsu and Tsuna?_

Well then, he'd win the conflict and be the next boss.

_But...Xanxus will bring the Vongola to ruin...and kill everyone for making bad steak..._

You really don't approve of Xanxus?

_Xanxus can't rule! _

So be it.

And all of a sudden, Xanxus choked out and collapsed. The tension in the air turned completely awkward. So maybe my suspicions were wrong. Wait. Did I...just win a conversation with myself? That wouldn't happen, unless...that wasn't me.

The rest was a blur. The Vongola rings were at my finger tips, but I couldn't quite bring myself to use them. I only had a few more minutes left before what – my organs were liquefied or something.

Bel boasted, Lancia arrived, and Tsuna was claimed the winner.

And all I could do was sit there and watch.

I was having a hard time paying attention to what was happening. The words spoken were all rolling through one ear and out the other, just like a boring book (let's say Wuthering Heights, or _Withering_ Heights, it should be renamed).

Whilst Tsuna and his crowd were fawning over his collapse from exhaustion, we the 'losers', stood to the side in a small group. There was silence. What was there to say? Better luck next time? But I felt satisfied just knowing it was more or less over.

"WARNING. WARNING. FIVE MINUTES REMAINING."

Or not. The wristband started playing an annoying siren noise, but I felt myself fall backwards. The last thing I saw was Bel's frantic lunge in my direction.

Geez, it's not my fault the watch is so annoying.

* * *

><p><em>The following morning...<em>

Just as Hibari was enjoying a spring breeze nap, there was a yawn. He ignored it. It was followed by multiple sneezes. And still, he ignored it. The coughing, however, was the last straw. Hibari recalled what he had done to end up in this mess.

*flashback*

"_Hey, that's it!" Dino grinned. "I'll tell you something useful. To make the flame bigger, you've gotta be pissed off."_

_Hibari stared at the flame. It looked pretty weak to him. "Whatever."_

_Dino sighed. "Look, the ring was one thing. But uh...Kyoya...I kinda need a small favor."_

"_I don't do favors."_

"_You don't need to do anything – just make sure Serena stays...within the corner of your sight," Dino decided. "Since...well...she can be a little...emotional...with these things..."_

"_Hospital."_

"_I just..." he paused. "I just want her to wake up to a familiar face, Kyoya."_

"_Hn."_

"_Is that a yes?"_

_Well, Hibari couldn't allow any student of Namimori Middle do anything to tarnish the school's name. A single student's stupidity could cause a lack of new herbivores to enrol. "Hurry up and leave, or I'll bite you to death."_

*end flashback*

His eyes snapped open. "Herbivore." The coughing didn't stop. "Herbivore," he repeated, louder and clearer.

There was a sneer. "Hibari Kyoya. You think you're _so _great. It's like – oh! My parents are dead, but I don't give a shit because _I'm Hibari Kyoya! _I can solve everything with tonfas because _I'm Hibari Kyoya! _I can break every school rule because _I'm Hibari Kyoya!_ I can strut around like I own the place because _I'm Hibari Kyo _- "

Fist to face. It seemed to stop the rant. He couldn't believe the stupid herbivore made him get up. After a moment, he realized he was staring.

Serena stared back with a angry face. And Hibari doubted it was from the punch. "What do you want?" she growled. "Didn't your mother ever teach you not to stare?"

In any other normal circumstance, Hibari would've drawn his tonfas. But her insult had offended him. For some reason, he didn't want her to be proven right. He could win a battle with words. "Seems like your mother forgot."

"Don't you dare insult my mother."

"Then don't insult mine."

They shared a dark glare. And then out of the blue – Serena made a lunge for him. Fast. Reacting to the sudden strike, Hibari instinctively jumped back. The problem was that they had been standing beside the edge of the building where the fence surrounding the roof which happened to have a gap. It took a moment for Hibari to realize that he'd just jumped off the building.

He expected to land with a splat. He was astounded to find that he landed with a splash.

The swimming pool. It had saved his life. Though ironically, he couldn't swim (due to his stubbornness as a child). The landing was painful, but he made it to the edge of the pool without swallowing too much water. His elbows caught the edge, and immediately, Serena was there, out of breath at the edge of the pool, holding out a hand.

"Hibari! I'm so sorry! I mean like...!"

Hibari stared at her extended hand. He took it.

And then he more or less tossed her into the water, calmly got out and it took every piece of will power to imagine the whole ordeal had never happened. Screw words. Tonfas solved everything.

* * *

><p>"T-tea..." I stuttered, placing a cup in front of him. We were both drenched, and were enjoying the heating system in the reception office. Personally, I'd completely lost track, but Hibari seemed to think that he still owed me a few favors here and there. Otherwise, without a doubt, I would've gotten beat up excessively, and then thrown out the school gate. We sat there sipping tea for what felt like an eternity.<p>

"So...what happened after I blacked out yesterday?" I asked, trying hard to sound casual.

"I wasn't paying attention."

"O-Oh." I drank the remnants of the tea and placed the drained cup with a thud on the table with a sigh. "Hibari, I resign from the Disciplinary Committee. I'm leaving Namimori."

"Your reasons?"

"Personal."

"Then I do not accept your resignation."

"I see no more reason to stay. You hate having me here anyways, right?"

He took a sip of his tea. I figured that meant 'no shit'. "You will complete the school year."

Double take. "I'm not sure how much longer I can stay without bringing Namimori into my problems."

"Discipline is my pride. Namimori will not fall under any circumstance."

Hang on. This was our longest conversation ever, right? And our first civil one too, I think. To be honest, if I wasn't so tense, it would've actually been quite nice. I stood up, and bowed. My shoes squelched as I left.

* * *

><p>"So, wassup?" I asked in an attempt to break the very, <em>very<em> thick ice. "Japan's cooler in person, right?"

"It's amazing, Serena-dono!" Basil grinned back. We were feeding koi at a public Japanese garden. "The modern culture was a bit of a little disappointing though."

"The 'dono' bit still kinda feels weird," I murmured, throwing another few beads of fish food.

"Ah, sorry Serena...san?" Basil tried hesitantly.

"Come on Basil. It's been seven, eight years? Just plain Serena. I mean, otherwise it'd be offensive every time I said your name without some honorific, right?"

"Of course...Serena."

"Better." Now. What should I say? Two kids ran around loudly, and we both followed their movements wistfully. _Okay. Serious face._ I tipped the entire contents of the bag of fish food into the water and stared the koi as they swarmed. "Hey...do you know what happened the Varia?"

"Some of the Ninth's men took them after you passed out," Basil recalled quietly. "I tried contacting CEDEF for more information, but I couldn't get through. Their lines are still down."

"Oh," I remarked lamely. I constantly forgot that Basil was in the same situation as me. He saw CEDEF as his foster family, just as I'd seen the Varia as mine. And yet I'd always inconsiderately said murderous things about his family. "How's the Ninth doing?"

Basil's mood improved almost immediately. "I hear he's making a good recovery. He'll be fine in a week."

"That's...great." I looked at my feet. We'd grown up in more or less the same sort of shoes, except I didn't like my pair, while he was happy to have a pair. "Say, Basil, I wanted to apologize about...you know, switching the rings..."

Basil beamed and took my hands. "To be honest, I saw you that night. But I thought you would not have done so without a good reason," he said with a shrug. "And I suppose it's good that you did."

"I did something terrible! You could've died or...well, you did get hurt and almost _died_ - "

"But I didn't. And that's all that matters, right?"

I felt my face go red. It's unfair that the people I know are so nice. The kids who had been running around stopped nearby. "Hey, look, that boy's confessing his love to that girl!" a girl 'whispered' ecstatically to her friend.

"Ah, that's so romantic!"

They high-fived and stared. What they were waiting for, I had no idea. Upon a mutual mental agreement, we sat further apart. Basil cleared his throat. I asked him if he had a cold. "No, um...Serena...I was just wondering if you'd like to...do an activity together."

"An activity?" I asked skeptically. "Like fishing?"

"Do you like fishing?"

"Not really."

"Uh...well..."

"This isn't like a training session or anything, right?"

Basil laughed awkwardly with a hand on the back of his head. "No uh...it's more like...a...a...da-"

His cell phone rang. Ultimate conversation bomb. I decided to go back to my living quarters, since it was getting late, so I waved and left before he finished his phone call. It was probably a personal one.

The walk back to my place was uneventful.

For once, there were no surprises. It was as if Namimori's energy had been sucked dry from the ring battles, and the town itself was asleep. My door was unlocked. Not that I recalled locking it. I wasn't even screwed to get to the couch. The floor was pretty damn comfy to me.

* * *

><p><strong>Sunny Sunday<strong>

I woke the next morning with no recollection with how I arrived in one of my bedrooms. I didn't recall making it up the stairs. Was I drunk? Wait, no hangover. Urgh. My memory failed me. It was a Sunday. That was all that mattered for the moment.

Picking out a t-shirt and a pair of shorts, I took a quick shower. The hot water was broken, but the cool water numbed some of the cuts and bruises. To be honest, I'd stopped caring about where they came from. I just accepted them as proof of my stupidity.

When I finished, I went down the stairs one at a time, trying to remember what there was left in my fridge. Let's see...fruit was definitely moldy by now. Vegetables too. Milk – not a hope that it was drinkable. Meh, I'd just eat out then. Making my way to the door, I slipped on a pair of thongs. As I passed the dining table, I noted Bel and Mammon who were arguing, and Squalo who was reading a newspaper. Squalo noticed me first.

"Mornin'. You're up early."

"Yo," I grinned, raising a hand in acknowledgement.

And then I froze. Quickly, I took a few steps back – and stared. I shut my eyes. I opened my eyes. They were still there.

"Squalo, what are you doing here? In my house?! No, hang on, I died, didn't I? God damn, I thought I was fine." I crawled onto the table and prodded Squalo. "I don't understand. How is this so...real?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...dumbass. Who sleeps on the _floor_?"

I turned to Bel. "Am I dreaming? No, it's impossible to dream up such stupidity."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~... you owe me two favors," he grinned. "Now go get me breakfast."

"Huh?" This didn't make any sense. Too realistic. I walked into the table. It hurt. So at least that wasn't a dream. _Maybe this is...heaven?_

"Here, let me get that for you," Bel insisted, standing up and punched me in the face. "Awake?"

_Alright. Fine. I'm not a good person. Hell?_

Squalo sighed. "Voi. Bel. Stop that." He folded the newspaper and focused on me. "We need to talk."

"The Ninth and Iemitsu...were doing horrible things..." I muttered, tearing up. I swear, I was going through that 'too many tears' body phase. "Is this hell? Tell me it's hell."

"Tch. You wish. The bastards are still recovering. They'll have their verdict later. For now, we're staying with you," he snorted, putting his feet on the table. And to think of it – wasn't he in a wheelchair the day before last? Crazy healing powers. "Though it's more like bloody house arrest, if you ask me."

With the main shock out of the way, I started to think of the consequences. Don't get me wrong. Hearing that the Varia were all alive and kicking was great news. But...when I say alive and _kicking_, I meant it. If I was supposed to watch over them...then I was completely screwed.

"When exactly did you get here? And how are your injuries and stuff?"

"We got here yesterday...afternoon," Squalo recalled. "Mine are okay. We probably just need to get a few bandages changed, shit like that."

"Did you guys eat?"

"There was nothing _to _eat," he muttered. "I mean, the milk was literally four weeks off. Bel's probably going to cannibalism soon," Squalo commented, eyeing aforementioned carefully. Bel just laughed, leaving me unsure if he was confirming Squalo's predictions, or laughing because it was so impossible that it'd become amusing.

"Hey! That's not my fault!" I complained. "Everything's all hectic. And it's only...three weeks and six days off." Squalo sighed and looked at the ceiling, as if he was saying 'look what you've done, God'. Though it could've equally likely been 'look what you've done, ceiling'.

* * *

><p>For about the fourth time, Terry stopped and heaved the shopping bags in a different position. "Serena, remind me, why the <em>fuck <em>am I carrying all this _shit_?!"

Oh, did I mention it was actually raining? At least the eggs would be sunny-side up. Or scrambled, considering the number of times Terry had dropped her bags.

"Terry, I already told you. There was only one trolley left, and there was an old lady. Of course I gave it to the old lady." I paused to let her catch up a bit. "Though I can't believe she just bought _a _potato. Like literally. One."

"Tch. Stop being so considerate. That's like the fourth rule of being a spy," she remarked. "People remember nice people. They don't give a shit about bitchy people, yah? I mean, that old lady is why the next generation is gonna develop back problems."

"Yolo."

We were almost back at my place. Thankfully, there were only abandoned warehouses around my place, so no one could laugh at our suffering. And so, we shuffled forward in a minute of silence.

"Say, what exactly is Xanxus like now?"

Upon hearing his name, my knees buckled and I fell flat on my face. I spat out dirt. "I went in his room to change help his injuries. He just gave me more injuries to deal with. He's extremely uncooperative."

Terry raised an eyebrow. "What, did he run away from a shot or something?"

"I wish! He stabbed me with the syringe, the tip snapped, and it took half an hour to get it out. Argh!"

When the two of us finally reached my front door, my mood was perhaps not at its highest point. And to make matters worse: it was locked. And so I dropped the shopping. And ranted.

"I don't believe this. Who the fuck locked the door?!"

"Calm down Serena, it doesn't matter," Terry passed off, dumping her load as well. "I'm sure they heard you, so Xanxus will probably get it any second now."

"Xanxus? That motherfucking piece of trash?! 'Oh I'm so high and mighty, so I can _lounge_ around all day, just coz I'm all _man_ like that!' As if he's ever going to do something helpful like OPENING A GOD DAMN DOOR."

And the door swung open. Xanxus glared. "You were saying, scum?"

So I was wrong. Cough. Well. I don't care. I am _not_ apologizing today. "Well, since you're clearly deaf, I was saying - "

"Xanxus!" Terry cut in, grin splattered on her face. They fist bumped. SERIOUSLY?

"Trash," he retorted, making his way back to the sofa. I saw Squalo facepalm. Bel snickered. Terry bounded into my house after Xanxus. With a sigh, I dragged in the shopping alone.

* * *

><p>"I'm sorry."<p>

Squalo looked up. They'd all just finished dinner, and we're relaxing, waiting for the food to settle. He'd been anticipating for those two words all day.

They all stayed silent, so she continued. "The last time I went to Italy before the whole ring fiasco, the Ninth told me to free Xanxus and avoid a major family dispute. So I got Xanxus out and switched the rings. When the Ninth was under custody at the Varia HQ, we organised the ring battles. Squalo went after the false half, Xanxus realised, and then the ring battles started. Everything went as predicted."

Silence.

Personally, Squalo did blame Serena at first. He felt like he'd been betrayed. He was angry. But what Dino said was right: there had been two possible results for the ring battles. The Varia could've won. Or the Varia could've lost. The same went for the brats. But Serena would've lost either way – yet she went through with it to the end.

At the end of the day, it wasn't her fault. They all knew it. But they didn't know what to say.

Xanxus stood up. Serena looked down, ready for what was coming.

"Oi, scum, go get me some tequila." He walked slowly over to the armchair and sat down, napping or something.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~….I'm not cleaning up!" Bel declared, jumping out of his seat and running to the sofa, where he picked up where he'd left off in his PSP game.

"Well then, Serena, I'm going to take the first bath," Lussuria informed, leaving as well.

Mammon had a blank expression. "I'm going to sleep. Keep it down."

On the other hand, Levi was the only one who seemed to have an issue. He opened his mouth to say something, but Xanxus threw a remote controller at his head. "Levi. Go find me a clean shirt."

"Yes sir!"

And so, Squalo and Serena were left alone. "Voi, don't stare like that. You look like you're mentally retarded," Squalo yawned getting up. "I'll do the dishes if you go shopping."

Her expression didn't change. Squalo sighed and got up. "We had the chance to win. But we were overconfident. Now hurry up and go get that fucking tequila, or Xanxus is gonna blow up your bloody house."

Serena nodded ecstatically, knocking over all the lamps on the way to the door.

Without meaning to, Squalo smirked. Serena never let go of the past – but at least she kept her head up for the future. Well, sort of.

* * *

><p><strong>Misfortunate Monday<strong>

Sunday ended all too quickly.

Bel slept late. Levi got up early. Which left me with less than two hours of sleep. It'd make anyone snappy. But it was Monday morning now. And I was late for school.

"VOI! Serena! Are you done yet?!" Squalo yelled from downstairs. "You're going to be late!"

"I got it, I got it!" I screamed back, having a twenty second shower. I threw on my clothes and rushed downstairs. "What's for breakfast? Toast? Cereal? Air?"

"Bel burnt the toast," Squalo muttered. "Down to the last crumb."

"What a tragedy. Cereal?"

Mammon looked irritated. "We ran out of milk."

I nodded, feeling my stomach rumble. I grabbed the cereal box. "There's some stuff from yesterday if you're hungry." I found my backpack in the corner of the room and slung it over my shoulder.

"A prince would never eat leftovers," Bel frowned, coming down the stairs. "How dare you all wake up the Prince."

"Well then, the _prince_ wouldn't mind starving like a commoner once in a while," I yawned, rushing out the door. "Nobody leaves till I get back!" And unfortunately, I didn't notice Bel's sudden grin.

* * *

><p>"Did you see that really hot blond guy?" some girl whispered. "I've never seen him round here before."<p>

"Yeah, I saw that guy too!" another girl chimed in. "I passed him in the corridor. His bangs were covering his eyes but...he was so cute!"

'Blond' was caught my attention. Hair dye isn't permitted at Namimori Middle. And the bangs? No sane human would ever have a fringe so long. That narrowed it down...a lot.

The rule was that outside of my house, the Varia couldn't be more than a hundred feet away from me. I hadn't paid that much attention to my surroundings that morning though.

"Quick! Everybody sit down! There's a substitute teacher!" Yoko (one of my class reps) called out hurriedly, scrambling for her seat. She was blushing.

The door slid open. And my jaw dropped.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you peasants are so annoying."

Immediately I stood up. "What the fuck are you supposed to be?!"

"Detention. Knight, is it?" Bel grinned mischievously, standing behind the teacher's desk. "And if you didn't hear, I'm going to be your teacher. For the whole day."

People stared at me. I didn't get why they weren't spending more time staring at Bel. Ryohei was absent, the lucky bastard.

With clenched hands, I sat back down. _He's not gonna pull this off...is he?_

First up was math. Here's what it looked like:

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you're all so stupid, aren't you?"

"Sensei, we haven't learnt this part yet...?" a girl muttered quietly.

"All right. I'll teach you, peasant. Y equals k on x. That' the basic formula."

We all stared.

If no one else was going to say it, I was. "Be- uh, sensei? I can't read your handwriting." And truth be told, it was completely illegible.

"Tut tut, didn't raise your hand, Knight? ~Ushi shi shi shi~...fine then. Extended detention by half an hour."

"What the fuck?! Screw you," I grumbled, looking out the window.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I heard that. Extended detention by an hour."

* * *

><p>By morning break, I was practically singing. Well, I was trying to find the best song for my funeral. Unfortunately, I was stuck between gangnam style or the harlem shake.<p>

When I asked him why he followed me to school, his excuse was 'I wanted to see what shit you do on a daily basis'. I straight out told him that he wasn't missing out on anything.

"Well, what happened to the normal staff?" I considered as I finished the last mouthful of some sandwich. I'd eaten, but the pain didn't stop. Well, it wasn't really my stomach in the first place. There was no bruise. So that at least ruled out Hibari's tonfa and the baseball bat someone couldn't swing.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...they saw the Prince and keeled over."

"You killed them?! Bel!"

"I just pushed them down the stairs, dumbass."

"THEY WERE OLD. AND FRAGILE."

* * *

><p>Japanese:<p>

"Sensei, that kanji character isn't the same as the book..." one of the nerdier guys pointed out. Normally, he was pretty popular with the girls, but I noticed several of them tailing Bel today.

Bel rolled up his sleeves, picked up the guy's book and tore it clean in half. "The book is wrong. A prince is never wrong."

Half the girls developed nose bleeds.

* * *

><p>And then...social studies:<p>

"All right everyone. Who knows about Hitler?"

Everyone slowly raised their hands. I kept mine down. There was no way in hell I was playing along with this.

"Knight? You don't know? I thought it was your homework," he drawled with a smile.

"Whoop di doo. My friend set my homework on fire." And it was true. Levi slipped on a dirty sock, knocked over me, who happened to be holding a match, into Bel, who had been laughing at my bad Japanese translations about the deeds of Hitler.

Did you know he invented the Volkswagen, highway _and _animal rights? Heck, he was even against smoking.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you do seem to love detention, Knight."

End result: no one gives a shit. Paper burns.

* * *

><p>After I think about...ten more detention extensions, the lunch bell finally rang. I waited till the majority of the class left (funny, how the remainders were all girls) before walking up to the teacher's desk.<p>

"Oi dumbass, my arm's bleeding again. Go change my bandages."

I scowled. It seemed like the sighing era of my life was over, and now it was the scowling era's turn. It was hard to say which one was better. And plus, I was starting to get suspicious about my own health. "Go to the infirmary."

"Wait! Sensei! I'll take you!" a girl cut in, and a small crowd that had formed behind her nodded enthusiastically.

"Be my guest," I muttered, gesturing to Bel.

Before I could leave, Bel grabbed my wrist and whispered. "Don't be stupid, you're changing them for me."

"Oh I'm sorry, but that'd make you a molester, you know? Against school regulations," I said at normal volume. "_Sensei_." Well, I didn't know that Bel's fingernails were sharp. My blood started dripping on the floor.

"Dumbass."

"Ouch. Um. Sensei. Do you mind? Like, I dunno, letting go sometime soon?"

Bel cleared his throat. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...well, it's a shame, but since Knight here is injured, she might as well escort me to the infirmary. Let's go then."

There was a pause. Then a bang. "Sensei! I have a bruise!"

"I twisted my ankle!"

"My stomach hurts!"

But Bel was already whisking me out of the room. By the time the first girl reached the door, we were already out of sight.

* * *

><p>Bel tensed. "Dumbass," he hissed, "that's too tight."<p>

"Oh no, what a disaster," she mocked, without a hint of distraught or delight. But nonetheless, she rewound the bandage on his arm. "There. Savvy?"

"If you've got something to say, then say it," he grumbled. Women. So emotional.

"I have nothing to say to you."

"Oi."

"What."

"You suck at lying."

She scowled. "What do you want to hear?"

"What do you have to say?"

"Oh that's a laugh. You really want to hear what I have to say? I'm pissed. This is meant to be the one place where I can chill, and then _you_ arrive." She ran a hand through her hair. "If I don't watch carefully - shit could go down. Someone might recognize you. And either way...I don't want to lose you."

He actually laughed. "So you're _jealous_?"

"What?! No! Those girls are too good for you! It's just that...if Iemitsu finds out about you being here, we're both toast. _Burnt _toast. Like, more burnt than the toast you burnt this morning."

Bel sulked.

* * *

><p>When I opened the door to leave the infirmary, I froze. Gokudera and Yamamoto were on the other side, with Tsuna between them. For all I could tell, Reborn wasn't anywhere to be seen – and Tsuna was unconscious. A fraction of a second before their superhuman reflexes picked up my presence, I shoved my usual cap on Bel's head, low enough to hide his bangs and eyes.<p>

"Ha ha, Serena! We were just talking about you!" Yamamoto grinned cheerfully.

I laughed nervously. Yamamoto didn't seem to care at all about the stuff that had happened during ring battles. But hey, that was Yamamoto. He didn't care about a shitload of things. "Lol? What's up with Tsuna? Was it Reborn again?"

"Ha ha, Gokudera kicked a soccer ball into Tsuna!"

"Oi baseball freak! I wouldn't do anything to hurt juudaime!" Gokudera argued defiantly. His voice dropped considerably. "Juudaime just accidentally ran into the goal post."

"Well then, don't make Tsuna the goalie."

"He was the referee."

"..." I gave up. Never liked soccer that much anyways. I twiddled my thumbs, trying to seem casual. But I'd never been all that sociable. "So uh, well then...uh..."

Yamamoto seemed to notice my social awkwardness. "Say, Serena, who's behind you? Doesn't he look familiar, Gokudera?"

"Yeah...he looks like..."

Bel grabbed my hand. "Her boyfriend."

I stopped breathing. Words of denial ran through my head, but I didn't seem physically capable to voice any of them. Choking at such a bad moment. Storming past them, my face flushed red. "H-he's a mental hobo I found this morning."

"Ha ha, okay! See you then!"

We speed walked halfway across the school – in front of the girls change room, by chance. And just to perfect the moment, Hibari came round the corner.

I'll be honest. I panicked. And shoved Bel into the change room.

"Herbivore. What are you doing."

I'd begun to notice something. With the cool types like Xanxus and Hibari, their questions were more like statements you were meant to answer. "I'm uh...just...uh...chilling...?"

There were high pitched screams from the change room. Hibari was still focused on me. "That substitute teacher that was with you."

"He uh...went somewhere...aha...ha...ha..." His eyes fell to my arm. Blood was coming through the bandages already? Rats. "That...was a tree," I coughed.

The screams grew louder. Hibari finally noticed, and took a step closer. Immediately, I stepped into the doorway. "Hibari! You can't go in there!"

His face said otherwise.

"Well, I'm like...a girl, so I'll deal with it. You can uh...go patrol and make sure the Cervello repaired the school right. Right?"

"Hn. You look ill."

As soon as he was out of sight, I skidded into the girl's change room. If Bel did anything lecherous...urgh. But to my surprise, he was standing with his face to the wall, keeping his presence low.

_But the screaming...? _There was a cockroach on the floor, and the girls were screaming, trying to distance themselves as much as they could.

Something was wrong with Bel. I was sure of it.

* * *

><p><strong>Terrific Tuesday<strong>

I felt so proud. I actually had a home-made bento.

Hibari came onto the roof. He noticed. "Hn." But...didn't seem to care. Let's see. What exquisite wonders did Squalo know how to make? My imagination ran wild with hunger. I open the box. And scowled.

A whole raw fish is not exquisite.

"Hey Hibari, do you like salmon? If you don't want it, I'll chuck it."

He stood up. "How dare you compare me to trash, herbivore." Out came the tonfas.

I jumped backwards, but I felt a burning pain near my navel. Worse than yesterday's. Without meaning to, I'd doubled over with a hand on my waist. Hibari's eye twitched slightly. The tonfas disappeared. "Hand it over."

"I thought you said it was trash," I muttered, feeling queasy. Brushing some hair from my face, I tried to catch some of the breeze. This was just...illogical. There was no reason I was meant to be feeling ill.

Unless...Hibari can see the future. Maybe he gave me an illness?

I'd rather doubt it.

A medium grade fever. Nausea. And pain in the lower abdomen. I knew this. Uh...what did the symptoms add up to again? Not the flu...or some gastric disorder, for sure. And then I remembered. Shit. I'd never gotten my appendix removed.

* * *

><p>Serena started pacing, but winced in pain and stood still. "Lal, I can't wait four days. No! It's not that. It's uh...something personal."<p>

Annoying. But since the herbivore provided him with food, Hibari decided to tolerate it.

"Suck it up?! Are you - ! Really? Uh huh. Day after tomorrow?" She hung up, and scowled. "Fuck. Shit. Hell. God damn it. Fucking shit. Fucking hell. Fucking - "

"Say another word, and I'll bite you to death." Hibari had listened to enough of their conversation to understand the gist of what was going on. Not that he cared. "Just go to the hospital."

"I can't. I have guests. And I don't need them worrying either," she added, sitting down with a wince. "But then again, if I don't hurry up and get surgery, they'll find out _and_ I'll end up being a vegetable for three weeks."

"You're already an herbivore. It wouldn't change much."

Another scowl. "Gee thanks."

"You're welcome, herbivore."

"Bloody carnivore."

"I am."

"That's meant to be an insult."

"It's not insulting."

Scowl.

* * *

><p><strong>Uh...R&amp;R or PM me if you have feedback of some sort, or if your cool like that, or there's this horrific error you can't stand looking at or...or...OC-ness or...well, issues. And let me know if there's anything you want to see as well; I'll probably make a mess of it, but trying is all that matters?<strong>

**Have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	27. Vodka

Chapter 27 - Vodka

_Later, on that terrific tuesday..._

"No – Xanxus! Don't drink that tequila before I pay for it!" I shrieked hysterically, instantly heading in his direction.

"Shut up scum."

Well. Great. You see, the Varia had felt the need to stretch their legs - fair enough. But...supermarket. Varia. Two words that should never been used in the same sentence.

_Never. Happening. Again._

"Oi dumbass, is this edible?"

Turning, I sighed. "Bel, tampons are so obviously edible."

Xanxus had overloaded Levi with boxes of whiskey, tequila and beer – the guy could barely stand, much less see where he was going. Muttering darkly under my breath, I tried to spot the rest of them - it was like 'where is waldo'. Or infants. Lose track of them for a second, and they were probably in a different country.

"VOI!" Squalo seemed to be arguing with some guy who had gotten his hair caught in a zip. Before I could even start moving towards him, the store manager ran past, screaming, as Lussuria waved, calling out about him having nice shoes.

_God, if you exist, now would be a great time to show up._

CRASH! I turned to see Bel and Mammon crash a trolley into a massive stack of cans. Squalo started yelling even louder, using many words that weren't G rated for the numerous children on the scene.

Remembering Xanxus and Levi, I looked up just in time to see a cute girl just _brush_ past Levi. End result? A mini wave of alcohol washed down the aisles. Old ladies slipped in all directions.

I buried my face in my hands.

* * *

><p>Dinner had at least ended normally. With a food fight, of course. With shattered plates finally out of the way, I rejected Bel's offer to play video games (a few knives lodged themselves into the wall) and steadily walked upstairs to my room, in deep thought.<p>

Tomorrow was my last day with the Varia. The day after, they'd be on the first flight out of Japan, and I'd be in a hospital or something. But how should I tell them? They seemed to have grown quite attached to Japan. And well...there wasn't exactly much to look forward to in Italy. A possibly lenient Ninth (he still loved Xanxus, right?), a less forgiving Iemitsu (somebody was going to have to pay for his hospital bills - one way or another).

With a scowl, I pushed open my door – only to find Xanxus flipping through my photo album.

Over the years, it had grown quite a bit. And well, it wasn't exactly for display at a museum. "Uh...what are you doing?"

He didn't even turn around. It was pretty obvious.

I kept my mouth shut. But that didn't stop my thoughts. _Oi. Dude. That's personal. Very personal. I'd like you to keep your bloody alcohol infested fingers off, please. _

"I'm not drunk."

"I never said you were."

"You were thinking it."

"I was thinking of your alcohol infested fingers. I mean, how else would they spontaneously light up?" I pointed out. "So obviously, they're covered in something alcoholic and flammable. Something like vodka."

"Shut up."

Urgh. What was the nice way to say 'piss off'? "You done with that?" I asked, gesturing at my photo album. "It's personal."

"I know."

_If you know, WHY ARE YOU STILL TOUCHING IT?!_

He glared. Wait. It was more of a stare. _Maybe I should make a run for it? _

"I'm taking this."

I noticed he had a photo is his fingers. From the distance between us, I couldn't really make it out. _One picture...it probably means more to him anyway, right?_ "Go ahead."

"I wasn't asking for your permission."

With a scowl, I held my tongue as he walked past. _...What a dick. _It took a few minutes to figure what he'd taken - a photo from the Varia inheritance ceremony, all those years ago. The six of us were there - me, Squalo, Bel, Mammon, Levi, Lussuria, and Xanxus - we were sort of posing too, and there was this guy trying to strangle Mammon in the background. It was cute.

_Why would he take it? Did he have a good time?_ On second thoughts, that was pretty out of character for a tough, stoic guy like him to keep photographic memoirs. ...Unless he actually hated that day so much, that he had to burn all evidence.

God damn it. I like that photo.

* * *

><p><strong>Wretched Wednesday<strong>

It was truly a rare morning full of miracles for the Varia. Well, not that anyone wanted to gloat *cough-Squalo-cough*, but _Xanxus _was in a_ good _mood_ before _midday.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I got up earlier than dumbass," Bel declared triumphantly, eating his toast – toast that _wasn't burnt_. Another miracle. There was actually edible food on the table. _The Varia_ had actually learned to prepare food that _didn't kill_.

"At this rate, she's going to be late for school," Mammon pointed out, hinting the clear necessity they all faced, whilst drinking his milk.

"Hn. I'm not doing it."

"No one's asking you to, Levi~."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I don't see you volunteering, Lussuria."

"Voi. Bel. Stop."

Their heads turned to Squalo. "Wait, technically, as the brother, isn't it _your _job to wake her up?" Levi questioned, voicing their thoughts. Not that anyone really wanted to agree with him.

"She's sick."

"Wait what? Serena's sick?" Lussuria panicked. "Are you sure?"

"I'm the brother. No shit I'm sure."

And then Serena strolled down the stairs, dressed for school. She was even _smiling_. "Well well well, aren't we all early today? What happened? Fire? Levi's alarm clocks? Xanxus was hungry?" Knowing no one would answer, Serena shook her head dismissively. She took a piece of toast, poured a cup of orange juice and ate standing up. "Is it just me, or is this place kinda pleasant today?"

Bel snorted. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...you fail, Squalo. As if dumbass is sick!"

And then Serena ran to the sink and threw up.

"I did say," Squalo muttered. "What the fuck is so important about school? You know everything they teach."

"But it's parent visitation day," she replied weakly over the running water. "I already missed it last year. And it was just the toast, honest."

Bel scowled.

"But I thought your parents are dead," Levi murmured. "I don't get it."

"Oh. Why do you have to remind me of what I don't have. Oh, the misery," Serena drawled sarcastically. "I have to keep up an appearance, just in case some parents think I'm in the mafia and report me to the police or something."

"You're actually a student?" Levi mused skeptically. "You're kidding. They let a crazy kid like you into a normal school?"

"Oh I'm sorry. They let a very sane asshole like you into the Varia? And what, did you think I just stayed in the bushes for a couple of hours a day?" Before Levi could retaliate, she changed the topic. "Any messages from Italy?"

"The CEDEF kid called about an hour ago. Some shit about us being limited to Namimori instead," Squalo explained. "I don't really get it; but I suppose it's better than the shit they had before."

She blinked. "Ah yes. This shit is much better than that shit. I totally see the difference."

"That's a serious piece of shit. Don't treat it like regular shit."

"It's still shit."

"No shit."

"All right, I'm sick of shit now," she complained, sparing a glance at a clock. She froze. "SHIT. I'M LATE. JUST SHIT."

_And here I thought you were sick of shit. _Squalo watched her leave. Something was off. And for once, it wasn't the milk.

* * *

><p>Every step was torture. Hunched over, I resisted the temptation to turn around and go home. <em>Home...? Since when did I...? <em>It'd taken so much willpower to appear normal in front of the Varia. Just thinking about a whole day of school made my head spin – I felt like a ticking time bomb. Well, I suppose, since I had appendicitis, I kinda was.

Just as I reached a T intersection, some overly enthusiastic person turned a sharp corner, rammed into me, and we both tumbled to the floor. I moaned softly in pain.

"S-Serena?"

The sun was in my eyes, but by squinting, I could make out a particularly smart redhead. "Shoichi? Is that you?" Now, there was something wrong. He was taller, and that kiddy feel he usually had was less noticeable.

"It's you! I've been looking for you everywhere!" he chided. "Uh...I mean...uh...are you all right?"

"I'm fine. You were looking for me?" I smiled with gritted teeth.

Shoichi adjusted his glasses. "Right! I'm from the future." He stopped. "Damn that sounded gay. Well, uh, then do you know uh...about the stuff that happens in the future and the ten year bazooka, right?" he asked hurriedly, checking his watch every three seconds.

I nodded. But why would Shoichi – future Shoichi know? Unless...future _me _told him. Huh. Why?

He looked paranoid. "Look, don't go to the future. Just...don't. Please. And give this letter to my younger self, 'kay?"

I took the letter and stared at him weirdly.

"Serena...I'm...I'm sorry. For everything, no one could've guessed that you would've - " There was a puff on pink smoke. Oh well, I hoped he said 'would've drunk so much beer' or something among those lines.

"Hey, Shoichi is this a magic trick?" I grinned casually, watching the Shoichi I knew pull a 'OMFG how did this happen' face.

"I – uh...did you...uh - "

"We're gonna be late for school," I commented, figuring that the current Shoichi wouldn't be able to answer the questions I had. As he turned and stuttered incoherent words, I slipped the letter (that his older self had just given me) into his pocket. "Have fun!"

"Y-You t-t-oo..."

Well, that was just unusual.

* * *

><p>Standing at the gates of Namimori Middle, Squalo took a deep breath. The ring battles weren't quite behind him yet. It was only last week when he'd almost been eaten by a shark, anyways. The Varia stood among him.<p>

Now. How did he get in this mess again?

*half an hour ago*

"_That's it. I'm going."_

"_Going? Where to, Squ-chan?"_

"_VOI! DON'T CALL ME THAT! I'm going to Serena's parent visitation thing day," he clarified quickly._

"_~Ushi shi shi shi~….if the trash-shark Captain is going, the Prince is too."_

"_VOI! You're not going!" Squalo yelled. _

"_You're not even her legal guardian," Bel muttered darkly in return. "The Prince can do what he likes."_

"_Ah! If Bel's going, I get to go too Squ-chan~!"_

"_VOI! NO!"_

"_I need middle school black market ideas."_

_Xanxus gave a nod. Levi, seeing his boss's decision, agreed as well._

"_VOI! FOR THE LAST TIME, NONE OF YOU PIECES OF TRASH ARE GOING."_

*end flashback*

And of course, they all the pieces of trash ended up going. WHAT THE FUCK WAS SO APPEALING ABOUT A PARENT VISITATION DAY?!

Upon arrival the reception, Squalo hesitated. "I'm looking for a...a..." He stopped. What was Serena's cover name again? Uh...was it...no...uh...maybe...

"Oh, you must be Serena's family!" she hypothesized, standing up.

Well, there probably weren't many Serena's in a Japanese school. "Yes. We are," Squalo confirmed. "You...know her?"

"Uh, well, not personally," the receptionist admitted. "But everyone in the school knows who she is. She's that popular."

"Popular?" Levi muttered skeptically. "You're kidding. The one we're looking for is an insult to the human race."

"VOI! What the fuck is that meant to mean?"

The receptionist looked a little nervous. "Well, she's on the Disciplinary Committee. She's the manager for the baseball team and has been approved by the principal as a temporary science teacher."

"Really?" Mammon almost scoffed. "That makes her popular?"

"Uh...well, she beat the kendo, sumo and karate club captains with a pen," the she recalled hesitantly. Well. The pen was mightier than the sword, right? "I think they classified her as one of the school's mysteries or something..."

Typical. "Where would we find her?"

* * *

><p>Parents. The worst part of parent visitation day. But an important thing for my cover. But hell, they were <em>annoying<em>.

But my mind kept flickering back to my morning. _Home. What is this feeling? HOME. I...I want to say it... I want to say - _

"Knight-san! Are you listening?"

I got up hastily. "Ah yes. Totally. Definitely." What were we doing again? Ryohei was spaced out, so it wasn't like I could ask him. Argh. That's right. We were introducing ourselves and our families in English. English was the easiest subject I had to attend today. I should make the most out of it. Before I spoke, I noticed Italian voices in the corridor.

"Voi, this had better be the right fucking classroom."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...of course it's the correct classroom. The Prince is never wrong."

Twitch.

"Oi trash-shark. Get out of the doorway."

"VOI! XANXUS! WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM!"

Twitch.

"How dare you insult Boss!"

"DON'T GET IN MY FUCKING WAY!"

There was a knock on the door. And the door slid open. I avoided that direction completely.

"Squ-chan, I think people are staring."

Lussuria was wrong. People weren't really staring at the Varia – no, they were just throwing worried glances. They were full on staring at _me_. And all I could do was gaze out the window and pretend I didn't know them.

"Knight...is this your family?" the teacher commented awkwardly.

"Never seen them in my life, I swear. You must be mistaken." But...it was pretty obvious that they were related to me. Well, Squalo kinda by appearance, and I wasn't exactly a great liar.

"Knight, please introduce your family. "

Tch. Assumptions. "This is my brother, that's my foster uncle, foster aunt – I mean uncle - foster brother, foster father, foster nephew," I scowled, glaring at the Varia. Ryohei had woken up, and looked like he was having a hard time staying in his seat. I think he got from my expression that he should keep his mouth shut.

The teacher bowed. "It's a pleasure to meet you. Please stand in the back." The Varia didn't bow back, being all full of pride, and I could feel the mutual 'oh, how rude' nods in the back. The teacher was definitely offended, but he let it slide – probably for his professional visage.

I avoided eye contact. This was _not _happening.

"I can't believe the manners of that foreigner girl and her family. What was her name again? Knight?"

"Yeah. My son talks about her all the time! I thought she'd be a better role model. Like that Sasagawa Kyoko from the first year class. That's a perfect daughter, huh?"

There were mutters of agreement. "Such a tardy student too," another lady piped up. "I can see why she's all like that, but I can't believe she gets good grades. My Sonoko-chan studies so hard and has never been late to a single class!" So I was late. By like...half an hour. Shit happens?

"I bet she _cheats_."

"Yeah. My daughter swears she takes drugs."

"Shame on her parents! And her family! How irresponsible!"

I was about to laugh maniacally at some of their comments, but the sight of Squalo's twitching hand made me think twice. Xanxus' glowing hand made me fall out of my chair. The teacher paused to turn around. "Is something wrong, Knight-san?"

"No sensei." Without facing the Varia, I did my best not to scowl. "I'd like to shame my parents too for all the drugs, cheating and tardiness, but unfortunately they're dead, so I can't tell them of their lack of responsibility. So sorry."

"Knight-san! How dare you disrespect the parents! Apologize immediately!"

"You said that we should pretend that they weren't there. If there not there, how can they hear me? I'm just being honest, really."

The lesson probably couldn't get any worse. But the door slid open, and Dino came stumbling into the room. "Ah! Serena, Ryohei, hey!" Dino waved cheerfully, seeing us across the room. People stared.

I sat back down inconspicuously. "Sensei, I swear I don't know this one either."

"Knight-san, just introduce him."

Dino was actually pretty into the parent visitation thing. Well, he seemed extremely enthusiastic to me, anyways. "This is English, right? My name is Dino Cavallone. I'm Serena's...adopted brother."

The teacher sent him towards the Varia – and I briefly watched their interaction. Kind of casual, but there was a little tension.

Ah, the disaster. I was trying to explain the situation to Ryohei using sign language so he would stop gaping, but it wasn't really working. After all, some things you just can't explain with gestures.

"Knight-san, are you paying attention?"

"Not really," I admitted, sick of trying to be a good student. The teacher sighed, and held up a piece of chalk. There was a question on the board. Some sort of a translation into Japanese – ah I see now. He wanted to embarrass me with my terrible translation skills.

"Any time soon would be nice."

"Right." Getting up, I accidentally walked into the corner of a desk and swore in Italian, so everyone else probably thought I was talking about daisies or something. I tried, but the comments from the parents really started to get to me.

"Wow, she's so clumsy."

"I know, right? I bet she has a brain dysfunction. And look at that grammar! Her English is alright, but her Japanese is just..._bad_."

"Shh! Her family's right there!"

"Well, it's not really ever her family."

"But I admit, they're fairly good looking. They're probably models or something."

"I agree! I bet there just stupid foreigners, though."

"Yeah. I can't believe that girl has relations to _them_."

_Fuck. That does it._ I threw the chalk duster at one of them. At least they appeared somewhat surprised.

"I don't give jack about the _crap_ you can spout about me, BUT DON'T YOU DARE INSULT MY FAMILY. YOU GOT THAT?! YOU TRASH TALK MY FAMILY, AND I'LL FUCKING SCREW YOURS FOR THE NEXT TEN GENERATIONS!"

Everyone seemed to forget to breathe. The teacher was lost for words.

And then I remembered the reason I had even bothered to come to school for in the first place. Right. Well, that reasoning just went down the drain. I cleared my throat. "I mean, like, it's very rude to talk about others in such a degrading manner and – ...yeah, I'm just gonna go to the principal's office."

Trudging out of the classroom, I walked to a secluded part of the school – and banged my head into the closest wall.

Such. An. Idiot.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...nice one, dumbass. I haven't seen you that angry for a while." It seemed they had followed me. Being the idiot I was, I had completely forgotten my earlier temptation.

"Shut up. You aren't helping," I scowled, trying to ignore the pain in my side. "And that's not a good thing."

"But at least you didn't stand there and take their insults," Squalo smirked. "But still, never do that again. Next time, I'm yelling at them first."

I sighed.

"Oi scum, if you ever let them get away alive again, I'll blow you off the face of the earth," Xanxus threatened, holding out his flame encased hand.

Dino chuckled along with the Varia. They seemed to be bonding...kinda. I sighed miserably again. "Why are you all even here? Couldn't you just let me suffer in peace?"

"Aw, but that's no fun Serena!" Lussuria insisted.

"So that little charade back there was '_fun'_?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...it was amusing," Bel decided.

"No, it's not."

"It's hilarious every time."

I turned to Dino, deciding that I was just going round in circles with Bel. "Well then, what's your story?"

"Well, you know how the Varia's leaving tomorrow?" he asked tentatively.

"Yeah, what about it?" I muttered.

"Voi, what?"

"What's going on?"

"The hell?!"

_Ah...crap. I forgot all about that...!_ Frustrated, I wasn't exactly in the mood to sugar coat my words. "I forgot. You guys are going back to Italy tomorrow morning."

"Well, I'm going to make sure you actually get to Italy without any issues," Dino continued, trying to lighten the tension as usual. It wasn't really working. "And if the Ninth or Iemitsu does anything unfair, the Cavallone family will support you guys."

"Oi trash, we don't need your help."

"Yeah, but - "

"Don't meddle, Dino," Squalo growled. "This isn't your fight."

"It became my fight when Serena got involved."

"Serena's _not _involved."

"Oh really? Then why - "

Frustration was starting to build up. "Guys, now's not the time. All we can do is leave our lives in the hands of two fucked up people."

Wait. That wasn't reassuring.

"OR, we can just sit tight and hope for the best," I corrected quickly.

...That made it sound like a plane crash.

"BUT, then again, whatever happens, we're in it together, and we take equal responsibility for whatever shit goes down."

"Dumbass, that was contradictory to the first line," Bel muttered.

None of my words were coming out right. Besides, what more was there to say? I blew it.

And then I heard footsteps. Very aloof footsteps. It was hard to explain - somehow, with my bad luck, I just knew who they belonged to.

"We gotta go." I led the Varia and Dino into the infirmary, hoping that Hibari wouldn't follow. But when I threw open the doors, BAM. Tsuna, Yamamoto, Reborn and Gokudera, all there, having their own little tea party or something.

Oh just fucking perfect.

I quickly turned on my heel, but SHOCK. Hibari was at the door. Worst possible scenario. Hibari + Dino + Varia + Reborn + Tsuna's Gang = Disaster. It was a simple equation, really.

Hibari's tonfas were already out. "Herbivore."

I thought of the hundreds of other places I could've been. But alas, I was nowhere close to any of them. Tsuna was doing his 'HIE!' things over and over. "Wassup?"

"Move. I'll bite that monkey mountain boss to death."

"Well, technically, he's my monkey mountain boss, so, you know, well, you have to get through me first," I yawned. I didn't exactly do that intentionally – I actually was feeling really tired – but Hibari took offence.

And for the thousandth time, he charged and swung. And for the first time of a thousand times, I caught his tonfa and kicked him back. He seemed to be extremely offended. "Herbivore."

"Carnivore." Aha. I'm starting to understand Hibari language. I was going to communicate further, but I noticed Xanxus' hand light up. Like a torch. At Tsuna. I almost did a 'HIE!' myself.

Jumping between them, I scowled. "Stop it. We're leaving. _Now_." I felt like I was talking to a kid. The room started to become increasingly warm.

I saw Dino trying to deal with Hibari in my peripheral vision. Reborn jumped on my head, as if that was gonna do something. "Xanxus, you have no right to be here."

_Let's see. Xanxus has his flames. Reborn's a top notch hitman. Hibari has his tonfas. I wonder who's going win? Twenty bucks on - _I mentally slapped myself._ That's not the issue here!_

"Just - "

"No one said I couldn't be here."

"- wait a sec - "

"I will not stand having such undisciplined people in my school."

"- let's talk this through - "

"Ha! You want to see 'undisciplined'?"

"- peoples - "

"Xanxus, this is your last warning."

"Do you think I care?"

The world seemed to spin, and my frustration continued to skyrocketed. I felt helpless. Why the _hell_ was I even here? Once upon a time, I was just an ordinary kid with parents and a dedicated brother. And now? Man, did I get into some deep shit. Most people would go 'how even' - well, really - it's 'how odd'.

They all took a step forward, ready to kill.

* * *

><p>When you wake up in a hospital bed, there's always a reason.<p>

Maybe you couldn't aim your Dad's very high pressured hose. Or...let's say your poodle you bought on eBay turned out to be a very vicious Doberman, and you didn't have the brains to look in the box before shoving your hand in.

I couldn't remember mine.

"How are you feeling?"

Ah. A doctor. "Dead."

"Just relax."

Relax. Why did that feel so inappropriate? "Remind me, what's my name again?"

"Not important. Names can change. What's the last thing you remember?"

I hesitated. "Last thing I remember? It was a good morning. I went to school. Something happened."

The word herbivore kept jumping back to me. Herbivore. Carnivore. Animal documentaries. David Attenborough. David Tennant. Doctor Who. Argh, this was going nowhere. Who was the doctor, anyway? "Why am I here?"

"The better question would be 'what brought you here'. Fate? Destiny?"

"An ambulance," I scowled. "Or maybe someone I know."

"Someone you know? Hm. Hibari Kyoya. Does the name mean anything to you?"

_Holy fuck. It does_. I looked back at the doctor. The more I stared, the more I was _convinced _that I knew him. Blue hair styled like some fruit. Heterochromic eyes. Evil genius smile. Creepy laugh. Screw the doctor. He seemed to be content in standing there and watching. Swinging my legs over the side of the bed, I froze.

There was no floor.

* * *

><p><em>Some time later...<em>

Shoichi fidgeted awkwardly. He coughed awkwardly. He even blinked awkwardly.

"Terry told me you were hurt last week," he muttered. Serena didn't react. But since she was in a coma, he wasn't exactly expecting her to.

Awkward.

"You're Serena. I'm sure you'll be fine," Shoichi concluded, pushing his glasses up his nose. He looked around the hospital room. It was filled with flowers and get well gifts. He knew, without a doubt, that if she were awake, she would've commented how similar the place seemed to a funeral. "Uh...I wanted to talk to you."

Man, that sounded stupid. If he hadn't wanted to talk to her, why the hell was he here?

"Well, you see, I don't know who else I can talk to." He took the weirdly shaped ammunition out of his pocket and sighed. "Three weeks ago, I had this strange letter. It told me to drop these on people...because it takes you to the future."

Lame. Beyond lame.

Deep breath. "Well, I've been there, and it's not pretty."

...Ten levels beyond lame.

He fidgeted. "The thing is, the first letter told me to drop one of these things on you too, but...I got another letter that told me not to. And well, I don't know which one to trust any more. You seem to know a lot about weird things like this so..."

That was even offensive.

"I'm not making any sense, huh?" he sighed. "I suppose I won't do it then." He supposed if she were awake, she would've told him not to listen to any of the letters. They were blackmail, anyway. Yes, that was right. He got up, and dusted himself off. "I'll visit in another few days, I suppose. Get well."

"Shoichi! Don't eat the purple duck! It's still alive!" She had sat up so fast, Shoichi screamed several octaves higher than usual. The TYL bazooka ammunition slipped from his fingers.

Onto Serena_. _

When the pink smoke disappeared, there was no one there. Shoichi paled. Oh shit.

* * *

><p>It was snowing, God damn it. And I was wearing a hospital gown. I didn't even have underwear, for crying out loud! And I noticed all of this in three seconds. At four seconds, my fingers and feet were completely numb.<p>

With warmth in mind, I spun around, looking for civilization. I think I was in a forest or something. There was a huge building in the distance. A mansion! Hallelujah!

Breaking into a jog warmed me up just a little. "Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why it is called the present," I muttered to myself. Well then, the present was some gift, huh.

Everything was a blur - I wasn't wearing any contact lenses? Why? What happened? The snow wasn't helping. _I was injured. Fine. I can sort of feel that. Is that the hospital over there? How the hell did I end up out here? _I could see the front gates - it was a mansion - which felt...oddly familiar.

"Who goes there? Intruder alert!" Alarm bells started going off, and people in black uniforms swarmed out of the gates. ...Okay, I know my eyesight is bad, but I swear to God - fire isn't meant to float.

And I swear to God, the Millefiore didn't exist...yet. And the Vongola HQ wasn't hosting any parties or anything.

_Just what the fuck is going on?!_

* * *

><p><em>Elsewhere...<em>

The room was silent. No one tried to pick a fight, no one complained, and no one...well, did anything. The news had come as a shock. Mammon had died last week, but somehow, this was worse. The air was filled with grief.

Bel felt lost and empty. He didn't even feel angry. Those words...those pointless words...

Lussuria had cried.

Levi...well, he hadn't particularly cared, but he was noticeably less attached to Xanxus than usual.

Squalo, on the other hand, blamed himself. It was _his _fault. If only he had said no to that stupid request. If only he had refused to let her go. If only, if only.

And Xanxus? He was still sober. There was something...building in his mind. His intuition. "Bel. Go to the Vongola mansion. Recon."

Slowly, Xanxus' order clicked. "Yes Boss."

"Trash-shark. Go find new officers."

"R-Right."

"Levi, Lussuria, go deal with the small fry. This stays quiet."

"Yes Boss."

When they had all left, Xanxus stood up, and moved to the bar. Finally. The trash were out. His eyes trailed over the labels, and he picked a bottle of vodka. He took off the cap, and took a long drink. Oh how he hated vodka. But she could've lived off the stuff.

_Scum._

* * *

><p><strong>Omake: Drink Vodka Like a Boss<strong>

Xanxus didn't like the beef the chef made tonight. Which is bad news. Very bad news. In a fit of rage, he broke three of my ribs with a slice of _beef_. A thin slice too. Just...the hell?

So I stayed up all night, in the Varia HQ's living room, contemplating in pain. Relationships. Xanxus and Terry. I'd be lying if I said I didn't envy her at least a little. I mean, my relationship with Xanxus was just complicated. He threw tables, chairs, and glasses and perfectly good chandeliers at me. He fist bumped with Terry. Even a baby could choose the better option, and Mammon frequently reminded me of that fact.

Xanxus was my boss. Well, one of. But he was my first, and he was definitely the last one I wanted to piss off.

I heard footsteps. Speak of the devil, and he shall appear. He wasn't asleep? Seeing how I was sitting in his usual chair, I tried to get up. I failed miserably. Xanxus poured a shot of vodka from the bar, and walked in my direction.

Crap. Crap. Crap. I tried again, only to bang my elbow painfully.

"Don't bother."

I looked up. _Did Xanxus really say don't bother? OMFG. HE'S GOING TO THROW ME OUT OF THE CHAIR? WHAT? NO!_

"I'm not going to throw you out of the fucking chair, scum." He held the glass in front of me.

_Wait, is he going to throw that at me?_

"If you don't take it, I'll consider throwing it at you."

I accepted the shot glass quickly. "Thanks." I took a small sip. Damn, it packed a punch. "Vodka? This is like, 80% alcohol then," I hesitated.

"So?"

"It's bad for your liver and heart."

Xanxus, being the hardcore drinker he was, drank it in one. "So?"

Oh what the fuck. I threw mine back, and coughed. "Hey, could you chuck me a bottle?"

"I thought you said it was bad for your liver and heart?" he smirked, tossing it over.

I caught it slightly awkwardly. He didn't peg it at me. Shock. "Screw that. If I don't get drunk, I won't be able to get out of this fucking chair."

He contemplated for a moment. And then he took a bottle for himself. "It's on, scum."

Yes. A very complicated boss-subordinate relationship indeed.

* * *

><p><strong>A short weird chapter with no actual plot progression 0_0<strong>

**Anyways, have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	28. I Have No Future

**Memory25, I just figured Squalo didn't revive Xanxus because he probably thought Xanxus was dead (frozen to death) or the Ninth decided to kill him. Levi and the rest of the Varia probably assumed that Xanxus was dead. That's just my personal interpretation, so...yeah. I'm just guessing.**

**It's a dull chapter, but please enjoy :]**

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 28 - I Have No Future<span>

It was too freaking cold for a prince.

That was what Bel would have declared any other day. So he stood by the Vongola's ruined mansion, in the shadows of a clump of trees, listening to the occasional hum of a Millefiore truck as it passed by. His mind was blank, lifeless as the snow around him, white as _her _hair...

Reconnaissance. It hurt his pride as a prince to simply stand and watch his belongings be taken from his possession - it offended him to share the same _air _as the Millefiore shits that scuttled around. But he felt so...powerless.

"Sir, the mission is complete."

His squad had reformed in his peripheral vision, but Bel had barely noticed their presence. Two were missing. "They'd better be dead or dying."

"We don't know Sir."

Sir this, Sir that. "We're leaving," he decided coldly (and it wasn't because of the weather).

"Oh my fuck – did you just – no. Bitch slap? Seriously?!"

"Shut it!"

Pause.

"You did _not_ just bitch punch me!"

Instinctively, Bel marched in the direction of the voice. His two missing men were escorting a bound and blindfolded figure, shabbily dressed in the Millefiore uniform.

"Sir!" they called in unison, noticing Bel's sudden attention. "We found this joker hanging around. The bitch was about to blow up everything within a mile radius. We think it's a coup."

The girl sighed. "For the last, LAST time, I didn't betray you Millefiore bastards, because I'm not part of the bloody MILLEFIORE. Secondly, you guys started it. Thirdly, WHO PUTS INFLAMMABLE BOMBS NEAR IMBECILES WITHOUT ANY FLAME CONTROL?!"

Reaching the fuming figure, Bel ripped off the blindfold. And froze.

"Holy _shit_. You're...not Millefiore?" She squinted. "Wait, _Varia_? B-BEL?!" And then her face twitched and she keeled over, seemingly unconscious.

...What?

* * *

><p>"Don't God damn throw your tequila at me!" The double doors to the room burst open, and Squalo diverted his focus angrily. Bel. What the fuck was he carrying? A body? Hell, was it still <em>breathing<em>? This was new, then.

"I found her."

Squalo glared, paying closer attention. "It's not her, fuckhead."

"Just look!"

No. He couldn't. But he did anyway. "Voi, that's a Millefiore uniform..." he noticed immediately. "Bel - "

"She was right where you last saw her."

"Then - "

"It's snowing. And she's only wearing a hospital gown."

"VOI! DID YOU - !"

"I had to be sure!"

But it couldn't be her. It just couldn't. "For the last time: It. Is. Not. Her."

"Why? Why not?!"

"Because she fucking died! I saw her dead body!" Squalo yelled, venting his anger. "Now, if you're a little shithead genius, why don't you explain it?!"

Bel's aura flickered darkly. "Squalo, she's missing a few - but her scars are real. The reason for the hospital gown - appendicitis. It's been nine years, ten months. Exactly."

It wasn't difficult to get the gist of what Bel was insinuating. True, her physical appearance had barely changed in ten years. But the five minute limit...? Squalo's eyes widened. "Good God, the Ten Year Bazooka malfunctioned."

Bel nodded grimly.

It wouldn't exactly be the first time that stupid piece of technology screwed up, considering the number of times that stupid cow kid sent Serena to India. Or turned the Sawada brat into a girl. But...but...

Sitting in his chair, ignored for the past few minutes, Xanxus was quite irritable. Scum. "Stop dripping blood on the carpet."

The two snapped out of their thoughts, and noticed the blood soaked bandages for the first time. "Voi, Bel, go!"

* * *

><p>Lightning flashed. The wind howled. A skeletal arm shot out of the earth, and –<p>

I came to the conclusion that I was dreaming. Consciousness was pain. When my eyes adapted to the dim lighting, I saw that I was in quite a pleasant room – clean, warm and just a light touch of gloomy. That in itself was an achievement.

"You all right?"

It took me a moment to recognize the voice and face. "Solte? Is that actually you? Oh God, you're wearing a Varia uniform..." My heart was accelerating unevenly. "The Millefiore. And...and...snow in Italy. I saw Bel. Argh, the ring battles just ended...Christ, what happened to the Varia?"

Slowly, he stretched awkwardly in the bedside chair. Gosh, he looked...adult-like. "So you are from the past," he sighed to himself, before brightening up. "Well, Serena, welcome to your future in ten years."

"Solte you make jewelry," I cut in sharply. "You fucking make _jewelry_. The Varia kills people. _Jewelry_."

"Serena. This isn't the world you know - things have changed - "

"Ha! Yeah right!"

Solte grabbed my shoulders - he slackened his grip slightly as I hissed in pain. "Serena you're dead! Alright?! The 'you' of this time, is fucking dead!"

I blinked and stared, waiting a long moment for him to speak. "I'm sorry, are you expecting me to be more emotional? Assassins don't have high life expectancies and such so..."

He tossed a thin notebook beside me (oh wow, paper in this day and age?), and turned his back to me, wiping his face with the back of his hand. Clearly, Solte was much more emotional about this.

_Serena, your future sucks. Yours sincerely, Terry Luck._

_And yes. That Terry. I make uniforms for the Varia. Deal with it._

Solte didn't exactly look like he was fit to talk, so I decided to read. _Three years ago, three scientists (Verde, Innocenti and Koenig) asked your buddy Solte to cooperate with them. He was just supposed to make a bunch of stupid rings for a box experiment or something. The pay was great, it didn't seem ethically wrong, so he did it._

_Last year, the little traitor joined the Millefiore family. Actually, it was the Gesso family back then. He just made more rings, so no biggie. And then he started making box weapons. I assume you know what they are, since you're just weird like that. These boxes were meant to kill, and since he was a wimp, he ran crying to you._

I looked up. "Really? Ran crying to me?"

"She's exaggerating," Solte muttered. "I told you over a dinner."

Well. That just made this recount a lot less reliable. "And my future self patted you on the back and said suck it up?"

"...No."

_Apparently, you were completely useless, so you told him to wait. Then apparently, a week later, Byakuran visited him in his laboratory, pointed a gun to his head, and asked if he knew you._

I looked up. "Wait, what did you say to that? I mean, when Byakuran asked if you knew me."

"I just kinda...had a mind blank. I mean, he had this cheerful expression the whole time!" he exclaimed, clearly traumatised. "Who the hell does this to people while they're hyper on marshmallows or some crap?!"

"Byakuran?"

_Then according to the little fucker, just when he was about to get shot, the ceiling collapsed, and you appeared. You got him out, but got caught yourself. You would've had a better chance if you had 'luck' with you. Pun intended. _

That...was the complete opposite of funny. It was like a failure of a joke that Mom's make. "I got caught in Millefiore HQ?" I gaped, envisioning the horrible way I probably died.

Solte took a deep breath. "Great way to repay you, huh? It took the Vongola Tenth half a year of negotiation to get you back. But...you weren't quite...sane."

I...lost more of my sanity? Shit, that was sad. "What degree of 'insane'?"

"You...were afraid. Of everything. Your reflection. People. Germs. Dust. Clothes. Lights. The stars. Even _food_," he exasperated, shaking his head disbelievingly. "_Food, _Serena. Those months with the Millefiore were bad - really bad - but you didn't have a single scratch. We had no idea what went on. And it was...it _is _my fault."

"I don't blame you Solte," I said slowly, taking in the list of fears. "If I had the ability to save you, but didn't, I would've never forgiven myself. The mafia doesn't exactly have a law."

"And ómerta?"

I coughed. To the point. "So I was raving mad near the Vongola HQ when I switched with my future self?"

He looked down. "Well not really. After a month of being...insane, you came back. One morning, you just ran down to the dining hall. No one could figure out if you were still insane for yelling 'Sawada Tsunayoshi' to Xanxus, or if you'd just gotten over your fear of walking. Or was it fear of breathing? Can't remember."

"...Fear of breathing. You're saying I had a fear of BREATHING?!"

"That's not important!" Solte interrupted, slightly impatient. I wanted to argue otherwise. "Just finish reading."

_When you got back, you were a nutcase, but you got over it this one morning - two weeks ago to be precise. You demanded an audience with the Vongola Tenth - according to Gokudera, Kyoya and Shoichi were also there. The meeting lasted a few days. Apparently no one went in or out, so everyone was curious about how you got food and went to the bathroom. _

...Was that even relevant?

_Two days ago, everyone in the Vongola with combat power was sent across the globe to deal with family feuds. It was just chance, but being you, you were all paranoid and shit. You had some job in Antarctica, but you made your brother take it._

I did? That doesn't see like something I'd do. After all, Antarctica's awesome.

_At the same time, an emergency meeting between the Vongola and Millefiore took place. Since none of the Tenth's guardians were present, you attended the meeting. It was a trap, no survivors. The Varia and CEDEF went to help; but the Millefiore had better weapons and numbers. They took over the Vongola HQ. And then you arrived yesterday. _

No survivors. So I died? That explained the look of surprise on Bel's face at least. But I _died_. I was surprised that there weren't any celebrations or anything. Bel would've been ecstatic, for sure. And Xanxus finally got rid of the 'scum' on the bottom of his shoe. The rest would be more or less unaffected.

"That was lame," I finally decided, closing the notebook.

"This isn't something to joke about!" Solte choked. "Just...just...don't say that. Look, I don't know why you're in the future. But...this is a bad time, Serena. The Vongola family is being hunted by the Millefiore. Byakuran is planning world domination. And..." He shook his head.

Well, what a wonderful future.

* * *

><p><em>The following morning...<em>

"Just take the motherfucking pill!" Squalo yelled. The flimsy brown tablet looked so...pitiful.

"So what, now the pill fucks mothers too, huh?" I scowled, looking away. Personally, I would've walked away too, but I was chained to the bed (Squalo knew me too well). We'd gotten over the hellos and whatnot quickly, since Squalo had just spent numerous hours doing Xanxus' paperwork, and was in no mood for chitchat. "Look, just because Verde made it and it actually works, isn't enough...reasoning."

"YOU WERE UP FOR THE WHOLE FUCKING NIGHT BECAUSE YOU WERE IN TOO MUCH PAIN TO SLEEP."

He tossed the pill in my direction, and unwillingly, I caught it. "I didn't complain. No pain no gain, remember?"

"VOI! THIS ISN'T THE 'GAIN' TYPE OF PAIN! IT'S JUST FUCKING DOWNRIGHT SHITASS PAIN!"

...That made absolutely no sense at all. "You just told me three minutes ago, that I got addicted to it like – twelve times in the past year. TWELVE. It's just a concentrated dose of opium and other 'bad' drugs, right? That shit helped nobody, really," I snapped back. "I'm not taking this bloody pill unless I need to."

Squalo sighed. Deeply. Twice. "If you can't even _sleep_, then it means you _need _to take the bloody pill."

I harrumphed indignantly. "I'm fine. I can wait it out, Squalo. And plus, I don't need to move or anything, so I can just stay bedridden for another day or two. I'll collapse from exhaustion pretty soon, so it'll be fine, really."

"For crying out loud - "

There was a rapid knock on the door, and it swung open to reveal a low rank member. "Captain! Emergency!"

Not that I was usually one to protest during emergencies, but I still liked my personal space. My room was not meant to be a meeting room. "Voi. What is it?" Squalo growled, mind on the same thought.

"It's the Cavallone family! They're under attack!"

Squalo cursed. "How bad?"

"Outnumbered three to one," he continued quickly. "It'd be faster to get there via air, but we don't have any pilots on hand. It doesn't look good..."

"I can fly!" I called out quickly, straightening up. "A plane, I mean."

Squalo spared a few seconds to stare at me. "Serena, if you leave that fucking bed, I swear to God I'll make you _wish _you didn't." And then he marched out of the room, giving orders. "Tell them we can be there in an hour at best, three at worst - " The door shut, and the room was eerily silent.

I stared at the pill. I was the Cavallone family's External Advisor. This was a time of need.

* * *

><p>There was a loud explosion to the left. "They've taken over the West wing!"<p>

Immediately, Dino started jogging down the corridor.

"The East wing's barricade won't last much longer!"

Dino sighed, and stopped in the middle of the corridor. He just _came _from the East wing. And unfortunately, he couldn't be in two places at once. "Get everyone on the East wing to evacuate. Romario, get everyone on the West wing out of there. We're not going to win this one."

"But Boss!" one of his subordinates gasped. "The mansion!"

"I won't risk the lives of my family for some stupid mansion," Dino declared firmly. "Now hurry up and get everyone before the Millefiore get to the underground tunnels. We can't afford to wait for the Varia any longer."

As the last few men trickled through the door, Romario frowned. "You're not planning to leave, are you Boss?"

Dino sighed. "Was I that obvious? Just go. Now. That's an order. I'll buy some time."

"But Boss - "

"Alright?"

Romario shook his head. "I don't like it. But whatever you say, Boss."

Waving off his right hand man, Dino calmly walked to his office. He ignored the Millefiore foot soldiers milling around his mansion. Those who spotted him were too far to attack. Arriving at his office, he locked the door behind him, and sat down in his overly expensive chair. With a content sigh, he put his feet on his desk. There was a cup of cold coffee, but he was thirsty, so he drank it anyway. Rapid footsteps accumulated at the door.

And despite everything, he smiled. This room held so many memories, huh?

He rubbed the bags under his eyes gently, and yawned. The Millefiore had chosen a terrible time to invade. But of course, that had been part of their plan. They knew they wouldn't have a chance against the Vongola and its allied families with Tsuna and Serena.

But it wasn't right. How could those two..._die_? They were strong. They had premonition on their side. It just wasn't right. Standing up, he took out his whip, and his box weapon. It sounded like they were trying to break down the door.

And then all of a sudden, the people outside his door...screamed. Confused, he couldn't quite make out their words. In seconds, there was complete silence. It was highly unlikely that they'd just keeled over from simultaneous heart attacks, right?

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Dino tensed. Who was it? Friend? Enemy? Frenemy? The door burst open, and Dino surged forward, until he realized...the person had a Varia uniform. But he tensed.

"Ten-year bazooka malfunctioned," Serena answered between breaths. "I- "

Dino hugged her.

He didn't care that she had blood all over her shirt. He didn't care that she was staring. He didn't care that it was her ten years younger self. Serena was still here. That was all that mattered. After a few long seconds, he let go. There was a flicker of pain in her eyes, but it didn't seem to be physical. "Sorry, you were saying?"

She sheathed her sword. "They were calling for an air strike. We gotta go." They started making their way downstairs.

"Are you all right? There were a lot of Millefiore guys."

"It's fine. They were low ranks, and had weak flames," she muttered. "And the blood's not completely mine."

"Oh that's – wait, what?"

"Got any fast cars?" she questioned knowingly, changing the topic. "Like all those Ferraris you hoard?"

He shook his head. "They've already destroyed those. How did you get here?"

"They blew up my plane," she shrugged, "which was handy, because I couldn't find a runway anyway. Got any other transport that still works?"

* * *

><p>The Cavallone family. Usual mode of transport: Ferrari. Backup mode of transport: a horse. Honestly.<p>

Upon arrival at the stables, Dino chose a horse quickly for me. "Name's Helix. Fast runner. He's yours."

"Mine?"

"Your future self," he corrected, slightly wistfully. "The password's 'how can a clam cram in a clean cream can.'"

...Come again? Anyways, with the password. You wanna know what's different about a Cavallone family horse and any other horse? It has a password. And what happens when you try to ride the horse without whispering it the password? You'll understand what one horsepower feels like. On your face.

It took me a few tries to say it right, but I was eventually able to swing myself onto the horse. It was already saddled up. Before I could ask, Dino opened his box weapon. "Scuderia." A white mare clad in sky flames just...appeared. Dino got on with ease. No offence, but damn - Dino's horse was hotter...and cooler than mine.

We bolted out of the stable. Barely a minute later, a plane flew over, and the Cavallone mansion was utterly destroyed. We stopped and watched for a moment. It was actually a beautiful orange. It matched the sunset. "Man, I'm sorry...your family's mansion..."

He laughed. His happy, careless laugh that I hadn't heard in what felt like years. "It's alright. All the best memories are here," he grinned, tapping the side of his head.

Yeah, well, mine are on a 4TB hard drive. Seems a lot less volatile, if you ask me.

By the time we met up with the Varia, it was dark, and the effects of this oh-so-miraculous pill had started to wear off. I couldn't help but double over slightly; my injuries had barely begun to heal - and I'd ripped them right open. And plus, I was saddle sore. What a pain in the ass.

"Hey Serena, Squalo's just up ahead," Dino called, pointing. "You see him?"

It took a few seconds for me to realize he'd actually said something. I smiled weakly, shaking my head. "Nah, I don't have my contact lenses."

He turned, concern splattered on his face. "Serena, you've been a little quiet for the last half hour. Are you okay?"

"Don't worry, I'm fine," I reassured, wiping away the beads of perspiration on my forehead. "Maybe it's just the weather." It wasn't snowing today, but it had started raining a while back. At least the blood stains in my shirt were gone.

Squalo was waiting outside a truck, blank expression, when we arrived. Dino dismounted immediately, and I fell off my horse just as quickly - perhaps not as gracefully. "Yo," Dino greeted, closing his box weapon. "Sorry about the change of plan."

Squalo ignored him.

What was it again? Don't leave the bed or I'll make you wish? Actually, I was pretty pleased with myself. "Well, uh...Squalo, you know, I was just...well...kinda...uh...just...you know, having a walk and such."

He marched over, and jabbed a finger at my face. "You're grounded."

"Sure. Anything you say."

"Then take another pill," he muttered, digging one out of his pocket. "It's a long drive."

"But - "

"Eat it. Now."

Not wanting to anger him any further, I swallowed the pill without any complaints. Wait. If he had a pill for me in his pocket, then that meant that he _expected _me to go help Dino. Right?

"VOI! You still did the wrong thing!"

But I had a feeling he was actually pretty happy.

"Do I fucking look 'happy' to you?!"

* * *

><p><em>Don't ask for another pill. Ask for another pill. Don't ask for another pill.<em>

"Hey Squalo, can I have another pill...ow?" I hesitated, changing my mind midway.

"Another pillow?" he repeated, skeptical. "You sure you don't want another pill?"

STUPID DRUGS. LEAVE ME ALONE GOD DAMN IT.

"I'm sure I don't want one. Another pillow would be wonderful though."

"You have like, four pillows that you're not using," Squalo pointed out, looking back to his report.

Argh. The pain. It'd been so nice, not having pain wracking my body for a period of time. But I didn't want to rely on some stupid pill. _Drug independence. Drug independence. Drug independence._

"So, what're you doing?" I asked, trying to pass time. "You look frustrated."

"I need to find a new illusionist," he muttered. "The guys I have recommendations for all suck."

"Obviously, there aren't going to be many illusionists better than Mammon, Squalo. Just go find a guy called Fran or something."

"I think I saw that name somewhere." He flipped through a few pages and frowned. "Mukuro's apprentice, huh. That's not something you see often. How did you know about him?"

With a smirk, shut my eyes. "Magic. And I'm special."

"Sure. Whatever."

"Hey Squalo?"

"Huh? What?"

"Can I have a pill...ar?"

"A _pillar_. You want a fucking _pillar_."

"...Yeah. It'd work great with the curtains."

* * *

><p>The following morning, I opened my eyes to see green hair, green eyes, a lanky build and a deadpan face leaning over me. "...Do you mind?" I muttered groggily, sitting up. Fran? That was him, right?<p>

"You haven't visited much lately, Serena-nee-san," he commented, giving me some space. "So I came to visit you. Surprise." How enthusiastic.

Nee-san? "Well, hate to break it to you, but I'm from the past," I admitted. "My future self died a few days ago."

"I know. Shishō told me about it. I was so upset."

Funny. He didn't look it. Was he secretly trying to insult me? "So, Bel and Squalo kidnapped you, huh?" I guessed, since he wasn't wearing a Varia uniform yet. Now that I thought about it, that was what Bel and Squalo must've been doing all day.

Fran shrugged. "At least the bag was clean. Enough."

"Are you going to run away?"

"Are you going to let me run away?"

"I ain't stopping you," I decided, leaning back into the pillow. "After all, the choices you make should be yours to make, unlike questions like 'do you want to join the Varia'."

"You're nicer than M.M, Serena-nee-san," he decided.

"I'll be nicer if you drop the nee-san."

"No way."

"No seriously, it annoys me."

"Why do you think I like calling you Serena-nee-san?"

_I think I'm staring to understand how Bel feels now_. "What are you doing here, Fran?" I sighed. "I mean, if someone catches you without a uniform here, they'll bust a nut telling you off."

"Oh, I was running from the guy who didn't cut his bangs, and a hippie."

"...You mean Bel and Squalo?"

Fran's face twitched in the slightest. Was he surprised? "Wow, they actually have names. When I asked, they just told me to shut up. I thought they were just nervous."

"So they're trying to find you," I summarized. "How long has it been?"

"Almost eight hours. Their perseverance is actually inspiring."

"Really?" I asked skeptically.

"No," Fran admitted, "but it's definitely on par with their stupidity."

* * *

><p>0. Vongola HQ is attacked.<br>1. I arrived into the future.  
>2. Bedridden. Tsuna and Gokudera arrived into the future (according to Varia intel).<br>3. Cavallone family was attacked, Squalo lost contact with TYL Yamamoto.  
>4. Fran arrived. Played 4 hours of iPad 12th gen before Squalo found us.<br>5.

Tapping the pen lightly to the paper, I sighed. It was my fifth day in the future already? Time flies when you're not having fun. If my memory didn't fail me, yesterday should've been a tough day for Tsuna and his lot. Something about Gamma and Kyoko.

_5. Have upgraded to being chair-ridden._

"Serena, you're not listening."

I looked up at Terry apologetically. "Sorry. I'm not really into fashion."

She held up the Varia coat she was working on. "So, yellow stripes, go or no go?"

"It's fine," I muttered, not really caring. "So long as no one looks like a bee, I doubt anyone will have an issue with it. Honestly, go find Lussuria if you want to talk fashion."

"But he's on a mission."

"Go talk to Bel."

"He creeps me out."

"Levi."

"He's stupid."

"Solte."

"He's working on something."

I swiveled around in the chair. "Terry, why on Earth are you even with the Varia? You hate everyone here, and technically, you didn't even join."

"I do not hate everyone!" she declared indignantly. "I like Xanxus. There. You're wrong."

"Terry, Xanxus is not a human being. That is why, he does not count has a person, thus is not included in vague words such as 'everyone'."

"I'm gonna tell him you said that."

"Go ahead."

She sighed. "If you really want to know, it's because Shoichi dumped me."

"I'm sorry, but this is what I just heard." I cleared my throat, giving a shot at falsetto. "Oh my, my boyfriend dumped me, so I decided to run to my cousin who happens to be very close but totally cold! Oh, and he's in this assassination squad that I don't really like!"

"Oh shut up Serena," she grumbled. "You were the one who told me I should crash here. And Xanxus has good taste in furniture."

...I'm such a hypocrite then, huh? And good taste my ass. He just picks the most expensive stuff, and then blows the whole fucking thing up. "So enlighten me, why can't people know that my ten years younger self is here? I mean, I'm not a possum. I've got no reason to play dead."

"Byakuran thinks you're dead. That's your status on the Millefiore's system. If you're smart, you'll keep it that way."

"I don't even know him!" I pointed out, annoyed. "And I forgot to ask Solte – why did Byakuran even ask about me in the first place?"

Terry flipped her hair behind her shoulder. "Look. Shoichi, him and me were studying in an engineering university in America, and the three of us kinda just...stuck together."

"Then shouldn't you be the one playing dead?" I murmured, irritated.

She ignored that. "Anyways, you came to visit once, and we had this double date thing."

"...Are you telling me, I went on a _date_ with _Shoichi_?" I mused. "Man, that's just ridiculous."

"No, you went with Byakuran! I went with Shoichi!" she stormed, arms folded angrily.

So...I went...on...a date...with...Byakuran? "Why?" Single words seemed to be the only capable thing I could comprehend.

"Well, we didn't want to leave him behind - "

"I WANT TO LEAVE HIM BEHIND."

"The point is," she interrupted, "that the two of you ended up spending some time together. You even made this game called 'Choice', and Shoichi and Byakuran ended up making it into a big deal. Byakuran really liked you."

...Disturbing. Just truly disturbing. "So like, like like, like?"

"Well...when the Vongola hit list was first created, Shoichi told me you were on top of the hit list, even above Sawada. That's gotta count for something," Terry summarized.

Oh sure. That makes sense. When someone's really interested in you, they kill you. Totally logical. "Why did he dump you though? I mean, Shoichi?"

She stopped fiddling with a button. "Well, he was with the Millefiore, and you told me he didn't want me to become a target for exploitation. So I suppose it's more like a break."

I smiled cheesily. "You _like like _him, don't you?"

"Oh shut up Serena. What are you, four?"

"_Five_."

"Come on, you're almost fifteen."

"Yet you call me four."

* * *

><p>Throwing back the bed covers, I yawned and stretched. I was tired. But I couldn't sleep.<p>

It was too quiet for the Varia. Though that could've been because humans were programmed to sleep at night - no, it was wrong. Making up my mind, I left the Varia HQ for the nearest town – about an hour's walk. Screw being grounded.

After half an hour of trekking through a small forest, I came upon a main road. The sun was rising.

Upon arrival at the town, I felt a pang of sorrow. Many of the older traditional Italian buildings had been replaced with tall apartment blocks. Overpopulation, huh. It was like a small city, not a small town. Being winter, it was quite late in the morning. School children and working adults littered the streets. That was pretty normal.

But the cars parked in the parking lots were unfamiliar. The food from the vending machine tasted beyond awful. Glancing at the windows of some fashion stores, I made a face. Really? Flared jeans? It seemed like inflation had taken place, too. A cup of coffee was 20 Euros.

Turning the corner, I grinned. A bakery. Breakfast. Yay. "Hi. Could I get a..." I hesitated. None of the breads or baked goods looked...right. "Actually, what would you recommend?"

"Well, there's the low fat, low sugar, low carb boiled donut," the baker shrugged. "That's quite popular with the girls. And there's the bacon, egg, sausage, cheese and tomato stuffed croissant. It's good for breakfast."

...A donut that isn't fried, and a complete breakfast...stuffed in bread. Ah heck. "I'll take one of each then."

"That'll be three hundred Euros."

Well, at least I knew my future self wouldn't be needing the money.

Finding a public bench which faced a painting of a park, I decided the future world wasn't actually that bad. Sure there were differences, but it wasn't impossible to adapt. Even my death wasn't that big a deal. And plus, now I could really say that line - I literally, had no future.

No, but what I couldn't stand, was my family. Or my future self's family . Or my family's future selves. They had changed slightly, mentally and physically of course. That much I could live with. But they all looked so..._tired_. Bel had literally come back to the Varia for...ten minutes, before setting out on his next job. I was a fool. An absolute fool. My idiocy couldn't even be described in words. I had it all - my family, a home, a life - I just...couldn't see it. _You don't know what you've got till it's gone...__  
><em>

"Are you done yet?"

I turned, and saw that Squalo was at the door, standing impatiently. "Ah, sorry. I was planning to go back before you noticed, honest."

Squalo sighed, and took the seat beside me. "Serena, I want you to tell me the truth. What's wrong?"

"I – I...I..." I hesitated. Why was it so hard to say? I hated the future. No matter how shitty things were in the past, I wanted to go back. To fix the wrongs I'd left when I came to the future. To prevent a world of Byakuran double dates. To prevent a world where the Varia actually started sleeping like normal people.

"Spit it out already."

Miserably, I looked at the salty droplets in my hands. "I want to go home, Squalo. I want to go back in time and say 'tadaima'."

* * *

><p><strong>OMAKE: The Unbelievably Dedicated Idiot<strong>

When Xanxus returned to the Varia after the ring battles, he went into his office for the first time in what was only months to him – but years in reality. It wasn't exactly a life changing experience though.

It was dusty.

It smelled of things other than alcohol.

And there was a piece of trash on his desk.

Well, he hadn't exactly read anything for a while. Maybe it was something that was just in the slightest, important.

_My will._

_Well well well, if you're reading this, you're either my English teacher, or an unbelievably dedicated idiot. _

Xanxus wanted to shoot the piece of paper then and there. But he refrained. There was still more. Maybe, instead of shooting a piece of paper, he could find the real piece of trash that wrote it.

It went on about how they would leave various materialistic goods to his stupid subordinates.

_Oh, and the only thing I ask is that you cremate me and scatter my ashes on the Varia grounds. And get a dog, and name it Xanxus. Coz, since we're dogs of the Vongola, he can be a dog of the Varia._

The door to the room was pushed open, to reveal...scum. "Hey, Xanxus, I still have to check your bandages, so stop moving around like a fucking dog," she complained.

And then his intuition clicked. Dog. DOG. "Die, scum." Out came the guns.

"...Well, I suppose my ashes will be on Varia grounds," she sighed.

* * *

><p><strong>OMAKE: My Hand, Your Hand<strong>

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you screwed up big time, dumbass," Bel snickered, walking a step in front of Serena. "I can't wait till Boss hears." They were in New York. A beautiful, noisy, busy, city.

"I did not screw up!" she hollered back, the noise of the crowd swallowing up half her words. "If anything, you were the fricking jackass who went high and killed a bunch of random people!"

"Yeah, but I didn't knock down the walls so the whole world could see."

She scowled. "Accident."

"Well then, accident. ~Ushi shi shi shi~..."

Two cops who were talking loudly bumped into him. He scowled, but deciding it would be too much of a hassle to clean up, didn't annihilate them, and just shoved past. Serena rushed towards him, a constipated expression on her face. "I don't believe this. You just _walked _past? Like, no urge to say 'you should die because I'm a phony prince' or anything?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you're my prisoner now, dumbass." He took out the handcuffs he'd stolen off one of the cops, and snapped one end on her wrist. Surprised, her reflexes kicked in and –

Snapped the other end on _his_ wrist.

Stumbling along with the flow of the crowd, the horror sunk in. They. Were. Handcuffed. Together. And rather impractically, too. Their right hands were stuck together, so they weren't even facing in the same _direction_.

Pulling them off to one side, Bel took out a knife and slashed at the chain.

Nothing happened.

He tried again.

Nothing. So at least it wasn't made in China. He pulled his hand up, trying to get a better angle.

"Bel, I swear, if you pull that up another inch, you're going to dislocate my shoulder," she hissed. "You done yet?"

"We're going to have to find a locksmith," he announced sourly. "There's one a few blocks East."

"Come on, be realistic. I can't last a few blocks chained to _you_."

"Fine then. I'll cut off your hand."

"Cut off your _own _hand."

"You're the dumbass. We don't have to cut off anyone's hand if we just go to the locksmith."

"...I'd rather just cut off yours."

* * *

><p>And so, they tried. Tried to make it down a few blocks. They'd decided that he would walk, facing the right way round, and drag her as she walked backwardssideways. No, not suspicious at all.

"There's a subway entrance on your left."

"Okay. Let's go eat then. I love subway."

*tumbles down subway station staircase*

Next: they tried having Bel be the one to walk backwards.

"Oi Bel, there's a pole on the right."

*walks left into a pole*

"Ah, I'm sorry, I mixed up my left and right again."

...DUMBASS.

* * *

><p>It'd been ten minutes, and they'd barely walked a hundred feet. "Alright, Bel, I've got a solution," she decided. "We each chop off a hand, so we're even on this one."<p>

Dumbass. What was with her and lopping off limbs? "Why don't we just do this?" he muttered impatiently, putting his arm around her waist.

He actually felt her shudder. But she didn't verbally object.

"Then we can both see where we're going," he explained. "Let's go."

They made it to an intersection without an accident. Progress.

She glanced at him, glaring. They were at a red light. "Bel, this feels retarded."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...this is what normal people do."

"So normal people handcuff each other and walk down the street like pedos?"

"I was thinking more of a stalker and victim."

"Hey! I'm not a stalker!"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...that's because _I'm_ the stalker."

"...You're real honest, you know that?" she muttered, walking forward at the sound of the pedestrian crossing, but it wasn't the one they were waiting for. The line of cars started accelerating.

Oh hell, were the drivers _blind_?

Serena continued trying to move forward.

...Well, she was actually blind.

Being pulled forward, and his senses kicked in. Pushing off the curb, he scooped her up and ran across six lanes of blaring taxis. But being a Prince, he obviously made it to the other side without a single scratch. Those who had noticed, pointed fingers, but the two of them were already out of sight before the first iPhone was unlocked.

* * *

><p>"You kids are always so active these days," the locksmith muttered, as he worked on the handcuffs. "You two are still a big young, if you ask me."<p>

"Young for what?" I asked innocently.

"That BDSM rubbish! When I was your age, these things didn't even exist!"

BD...SM? SM...as in Rihanna's totally disturbing song? Bel and I shared a millisecond of eye contact. "What? With him? No. NO. You're way out of the ball park, dude. We were just - "

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...having some fun."

"NO. WE WEREN'T."

The old man shrugged. "I was joking. I know these handcuffs belong to the cops." Before we could do anything, he put his hands up in defense. "Don't worry, I know who you two are," he laughed. "Varia, was it? Honestly, you guys are a bit far from home."

"...You're in the mafia?" I murmured skeptically.

"Retired. Working with a more honest trade," he nodded. He tinkered with the handcuffs a little longer, and Bel's end snapped open. In another minute, mine was open too.

I passed over a couple hundred dollar bills. "Thank you," I added quickly, rubbing my wrist. Bruises, blisters, scratches. "I hope you enjoy retirement."

"You two play nice, alright," he warned, as we exited the shop.

We'd only just walked out of the lonely store when I remembered. "Hey Bel, thanks for uh...saving my ass?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I am a prince, after all."

That makes no sense. "But I thought I was a peasant. Why the hell would you save a peasant?"

"You're a dumbass."

"Is there a difference?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...obviously."

We walked bit further. Peak hour was over, so the streets were considerably less crowded. "Say Bel, my right side feels heavy. Can we hold hands?"

"Huh?"

"You know, just so both my whole body's tired, not just half."

His face cracked into a wide grin. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...you owe me, though."

I beamed. Yeah yeah, I'll pay you back in the next life.

* * *

><p><strong>If you don't get anything...PM or review? And I need feedback to improve *thumbs up*. Eg. likes, dislikes, requests, issues, questions, OOCness, Mary Sueness, etc. . Or really, if you're just awesome, and feel like writing a message :D<strong>

**Have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	29. No Such Thing As Losing

**For those that didn't get the future Serena's death - it was meant to be slightly vague. So uh...yeah. Fran doesn't show up previously, but hopefully, I'll show how they meet after the future arc *thumbs up*. **

**This chapter's confusing with time; just assume every line break is a time skip of some sort.**

**Enough ranting. Please enjoy :3**

* * *

><p>Chapter 29 - No Such Thing As Losing<p>

"Faster!"

I scowled, biting back the urge to snap back at Squalo.

"Don't think! Just do it!"

_Yup. I knew he was actually secretly practicing for a Nike advertisement or something. Would their salary be higher than the Varia's? _My arms were shaking. But I clenched my teeth, and pushed. Five. FIVE. FIVE push-ups. Not five girl push-ups. Not five belated half push-ups. Five actual push-ups. I collapsed joyfully. "There. I'm finished. We're done now, right?"

"Ten sets. You did _a _set." It wasn't as much a statement as an order.

I did the math. And groaned. Today was my sixth day in the future. It definitely made me regret hating the first five.

* * *

><p>"Voi, stop stabbing your plate."<p>

I looked up, forcing my eyes to stay open. "Huh? Start saving my paint? But I'm not painting, Squalo. I'm eating my dinner now."

Squalo facepalmed.

There were six people at the dinner table. Fran was training with his illusions. And Bel was on an urgent mission. Mammon was *sniffle* deceased. In a nutshell: it was awkward.

"Say, where exactly is Bel? I haven't seen his stupid fringe for a while now," I yawned and slapped myself awake. "Why are you all so..._civilised_? Just sitting there and eating?"

Levi looked across the table. "And whose fault is that?"

"Yours?"

"Voi, shut up Levi," Squalo growled, cutting another piece of steak. "Eat your meat Serena."

With a sigh, I picked up my knife. I'd never realized how much blood there was in a steak. Not that I wanted to know. "Why is it always me?" It was more of a personal mutter, but being superhuman wonders, the whole table heard it.

"It's because you're unlucky," Terry winked.

"No, it's because you're special!" Lussuria argued. "Don't be mean, Terry-chan."

Levi grunted. "Special as in mentally disabled."

"Levi! That's not what I meant!"

"No no, I think the loser was actually spot on for once."

"Scum will always be scum."

"Oh, you're paying attention too, Boss?"

And amongst it all, Squalo smirked. "It's because you're Serena."

I noticed his change in mood immediately. "Holy shit, Squalo - I thought you'd lost the ability to _smile_. Well smirk. Well, mouth twitch. Anti-gravital movement of the mouth. Same thing."

Squalo stood up, waving off our laughter. "I'd forgotten what you were like," he murmured quietly to himself.

"Did you say something?"

"No. Don't forget your curfew."

"You're only being bossy becuase just because you're old enough to be my mother now, huh?"

"Oi. Don't be a fuckwit. I'd be your Dad, obviously."

Elbowing Lussuria, Terry smirked. "Xanxus is the Dad. _Obviously_."

"What? VOI!"

"Boss is clearly more manly than you," Levi scoffed.

"That means you became a parent at sixteen. That's awfully irresponsible, if you ask me," Lussuria laughed. "Though that'd make Boss - "

Squalo threw his chair at Lussuria. Levi threw a punch at Squalo. Xanxus threw the table at the lot of them.

_Men. All they ever do is throw things._ To my surprise, the carnage earned a subconscious grin. _Now THIS is more like it.__  
><em>

* * *

><p>The days passed quickly.<p>

My training with Squalo grew intense - other than swordsmanship and close combat, I worked on longer ranged skills like archery and guns. But despite all progress, he wouldn't let me touch anything related to flames. I just couldn't make any sense of it - without flames, all other skills were basically useless. After a week of crappy responses, I'd had enough.

Hesitantly, I knocked on the door. It was kind of late, after all. Or early. It was closer to sunrise than the previous sunset. "Solte, your light's still on...you got a minute?"

There was a slight crash, and the door swung open to reveal a slightly dishevelled Solte. "Serena! Did you need something?"

"Oh, uh, well...I...uh..."

"Come in," he offered, taking a step back.

"Um...sure." As I walked in, I couldn't help but smile. The place was a mess. His desk was filled with delicate instruments - and a single box. Neatly stacked in the corner were rows of finished boxes. I felt like a kid in a toyshop.

He scratched the back of his head. "I'm sorry, This...is a bit - "

"Freaking awesome."

"...I was going to say messy, but awesome's good too," he laughed lightly.

"You're up this late?" I murmured. "Shite man, this workspace is ergonomically disastrous. The lighting, the high desks - "

He shrugged. "I made a mistake, helping the Millefiore. The only thing I can do now is to design better ones for the Vongola. A little blindness and back pains is nothing."

"Just don't overwork yourself..."

Smiling wistfully, Solte stared somewhat creepily. "You really didn't change... So, I presume you're not visiting for the sake of spending time with me?"

"Aha, I was wondering if I could...borrow some rings."

Solte drew up a spare chair for me, and he sat down. "Squalo - has he told you about how flames work?"

I shook my head. "But I do get the theory of it, more or less."

"I'll be totally honest with you, Serena," Solte decided. "Your resolution is too weak."

I felt that one. Or maybe that was just a bruise. "...Really?"

He nodded. "You know how you can use normal weapons and flames together?"

"Yeah, I've seen Squalo do that."

"Your flames are pure - never seen readings like it, even in the Millefiore. But you don't have the stamina to keep them going," he tried to explain. "The purity of a flame is determined when you're born - that's not the issue. You see, the stronger your resolution, the less stamina required."

_I...lack...resolution?_

Solte noticed my disappointment, and fumbled around his desk in search for something. "Ah – that may not entirely be the same for you, though. Rings and boxes were only introduced about a year ago, and well...when you got better after the time with the Millefiore, you weren't as...stable. I made really, really unique box weapon too, but..."

"But?"

"Your future self couldn't master it. No one else had the requirements to use it. So you lent it to some...Kyo-chan guy," he hesitated, "can never quite remember the guy's name. He's in Japan, last count."

I blanched. "You mean Hibari Kyoya?"

"Hibari! That's the guy!" Solte recalled excitedly, seemingly having found what he was fiddling around for.

_It's...it's the future. Things don't have to fucking make sense. Actually, it's probably more normal if they don't. Hm, yeah. _"So...what type of flames do I have?"

Seven rings rattled onto the table. "All of them."

* * *

><p>Squalo woke from a dreamless sleep. He got out of bed and dressed quickly, noticing something strange.<p>

He'd gotten out of the wrong side of the bed.

Intruders? No. Hostile flames? No. Open window? ...His window didn't even open. For the past twenty years, he'd gotten out of the same side of the bed. The left side. But today, for some reason, he'd gotten out of the right side. As in the wrong, right side. Not the right right side. Whatever. Well, getting out of the wrong side of the bed didn't guarantee that he would be in a bad mood for the whole day.

Upon opening his door, his hopes shattered.

Serena, who'd been leaning against his door, rolled, and came up on one knee, shooting –

A juice popper.

Squalo didn't like fruit juice. And sure as hell he didn't like it at five in the morning. On his face. With _pulp_.

"Better than a bullet, right?" she smiled innocently, passing him a wet wipe. "Sorry, it was a reflex. I was up late."

"Pulp. Who the fuck drinks juice with _pulp_?" he hissed, snatching it quickly. "And who has wet wipes on hand?!"

"...I do."

"Voi, what are you doing here so early in the motherfucking morning?" Squalo continued impatiently. "Don't you have better places to be?"

"Spar with me."

He blinked. "What?"

Taking a deep breath, she drew her sword from its sheath, tossing the latter to the side. Although Squalo couldn't see it - he sensed it on the blade. Flames...three types, no four...six...seven?!

With a smirk, he folded his arms to hide his satisfaction. "Voi, I might just take you up on that."

* * *

><p>It was a long day. Of course, not literally - an hour was still sixty minutes, and a minute was still sixty seconds. It just <em>felt <em>longer. My spar with Squalo ended when I collapsed after a couple hours - not because I was inferior in skills. Well actually, I was - but my diversity in flames were a massive advantage. Squalo started a lengthy lecture about taking risks and sleeping.

So ten seconds in, I fell asleep. I'm a great listener.

The darkness was actually unnerving. It was like... a slenderman moment.

"Assassin."

"Argh! Face! Show me your face!" My dream brightened up, and I made out a room with no windows or doors. And no lighting source. How even...? Upon seeing an actual face, I relaxed. "Oh. Mukuro. Still in Vindice, I see."

"Time crawls slowly," he smiled creepily, "but I have many forms of entertainment." _Maybe Mukuro's slenderman in DISGUISE. _

Entertainment. In a pickle jar. I'd only spent a few months in Vindice, but it wasn't pretty. "You mean like plotting your amazingly boring future?"

Mukuro's face twitched. "...No. Plotting quite an eventful future, actually. But I meant possessing people. Like Guido Greco. He's my current tool for gaining access to the Millefiore's system."

"People aren't tools."

"You're my tool, assassin."

"I'm not a person then." I paused. "Wait. I'm not a tool either." Hang on. "I'm a potato." No no, the other one. "I'm an assassin." ARGH. Screw it. "Fine! So I'm your tool."

"I know," he commented. "Get your acquaintance Terry to set up a safe line between the Varia and Millefiore. I'll hack the network from there, and send the intel I find."

I laughed. Loudly. "Mukuro, you're such a funny guy – sometimes I forget you're an inhuman human who doesn't have a scrap of dignity for humanity. Coz really, last time you and Terry met in person – you almost killed her."

He frowned, having a hard time remembering. "I did? Ku fu fu fu...it must be your imagination."

"It is not!" I retorted angrily. "Actually, you did kill her. Her heart stopped for three minutes. She was...lucky. And you help the Vongola's side? Lol man, lol."

"I'm being serious."

"How serious?"

A trident appeared in his hands. Ah, violently serious, I see. I actually had to sit down at that. Actually, I had a feeling he would stab me if I didn't end up underneath than him in some shape or form. What a lame form of power. "Why?"

He disappeared, leaving me in darkness. "Because, assassin, you're going to break me out of Vindice."

* * *

><p>Bel walked through the Varia hallways at his own pace. He was a prince, of course, but even princes had their limits when it came to energy levels. It'd been almost two weeks since he'd returned to the Varia HQ or slept a proper wink – and he'd have been lying if he'd said either wasn't because of <em>her<em>.

Gently, he pushed open his bedroom door, and crashed on the bed. He pulled out his phone, and stared image on the screen. _I'm not a liar_, she had said, his ice-cream obviously on her cheek. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...you're a liar..."

"Ngh...light..."

And _then_ he realized there was someone else on the bed. "...What are you fucking doing?"

Serena more or less threw herself off the bed. It was as if he had a grenade or something. "Bel! I'm sorry! I was just - ! You know - ! And like - !"

"What? Nightmare?"

"A-ah...there was...a spider on the wall...so...uh..." she stuttered uncontrollably, and Bel could feel her shaking, even with the distance between them.

"You can stay if you be quiet."

"No no, it's fine, I'll just go sleep elsewhere, aha...ha..ha..."

That's right. Ten years ago, dumbass wouldn't sleep within five feet him. "Suit yourself." Swiftly, he slipped off his coat, and slipped under the covers. It was still warm.

"Oh, and thanks for the other day. You know, at the Vongola HQ. Ow! Shit! A wire?"

She'd be fine. Totally. He was too tired to care.

"Knives! Damn it! Ouch! Is my foot bleeding? Hell!" CRASH.

On second thoughts, she wouldn't. Un. Fucking. Believable. The knives weren't even _on _the floor. They were locked in a safe made of bulletproof material. Bel sat up, annoyed. "Dumbass. Shut up."

"Sorry, I can't find - " CRASH. "- the door. I may've just found it. Ow..."

Walking over to the whereabouts of the last crash, Bel picked up her half conscious body, dropped her on the bed, and grabbed his coat. Fuck it. He'd sleep somewhere else.

* * *

><p>Before I realized, my time in the future had become a blur. One day merged into the next.<p>

I focused on controlling my flames with an array of weapons that Solte had conveniently organised in a number of compact storage boxes. Using multiple flames was surprisingly easy - issues came with _selective _flames. Each had its specific attributes - turning the right ones off and on proved harder than I'd anticipated.

During my breaks, I worked on puzzles. Well, in reality, they were just lame games. Like minesweeper. Its use: fast deductive reasoning. Tetris: logical placement. Cubefield: reflexes. Solte had a stupid reasoning for each one. As I got the hang of each, he came up with the ultimate abomination.

6 sides + 6 colors + 54 individual faces + 26 blocks = total spontaneous combustion of one's brain.

I threw the rubik's cube on the coffee table and glared, as if that would've actually solved it. If only glaring could solve things. Then Hibari would've actually been more brains than brawn. But alas, it did nothing. According to Solte, it had some relation to my box animal - so what, was I supposed to rearrange it and throw it like a grenade? There was an endless amount of issues with that.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...rage quitting, dumbass?" Bel taunted, picking it up, and solving it in less than ten seconds. Less than seven, actually. Then he continued throwing his knives at a dartboard hanging on the wall.

Geniuses. Degrading normal people so casually. God damn.

"Say Bel, have you actually seen my box animal?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...of course."

"Oh yeah? What is it?"

"Not telling."

*Eye twitch*. Deciding that the rubik's cube could wait, I pulled out a pen and stared at a half finished sudoku puzzle. "I didn't know my future self could open boxes. And she just _let_ you watch?"

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...I asked."

_And she just said yes?!_ "Bel, you've been acting really weird," I accused. "You're actually...forget it." Furiously, I scrunched up the piece of paper, tossed it to one side, and leant back on the couch with a sigh. _I'm a failure._

"Throw a knife," Bel advised, passing a knife over the table. "It'll improve your mood."

I stared at Bel. Since when did he care about improving my mood? But nonetheless, I picked it up, judged the distance, and threw it. It missed. ARGH.

"Oi dumbass, you're throwing it weird." Bel stood up, and walked over to me. "You're not pulling back enough."

"Huh?"

"Do this." He grabbed my waist, and twisted my body to the side. "Momentum. Got it?"

_...Help! Someone! Tasukete! Anyone other than Bel, obviously. Physical contact...!_

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...dumbass, are you breathing?"

So that's what I'd forgotten to do. Deep breaths. "Bel, did you eat a funky mushroom?"

He choked on air.

"Oh no...it's drugs isn't it?"

"There's...there's something I need to tell you."

"...?"

Bel looked away. "I'm not saying it."

"Then write it down, jackass," I grunted, passing him a pen and a piece of blank paper. He hesitated for a while, but jotted something down, put it on the table and left immediately. I turned the piece of paper around, so the writing was facing me. As usual, it was barely ledgible.

**9x – 7i [greater than sign] 3(3x – 7u)**

Oh, he was _really _trying to piss me off, huh? "BEL! I'M NOT DOING FUCKING MATHS BEFORE MIDDAY!"

* * *

><p>In my dream, I was walking through the airport, carrying only a backpack. Somehow, I knew I was in America.<p>

"_Shoichi, you're fucking invisible," I muttered, weaving through the crowd waiting for new arrivals. "If I ever visit again, I'll get you to wear a God damn bikini. A hot pink one." Several more minutes passed without much luck._

_Urgh. Maybe he was in the toilet. I followed the signs. _

"_Serena! That's the men's bathroom!"_

_Turning around, I saw Shoichi running through the crowd, waving frantically. I raised an eyebrow. "You're late." _

"_I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Terry wanted to drive; and you know..." His pale face told exactly how his trip to the airport was. Terry drove like someone in a spy movie. No concern for road safety at all. "Anyways, a friend of ours is waiting for froyo so..."_

"_Froyo," I sighed, giving a mock salute in greeting._

"_Frozen yoghurt."_

"_Frozen yoghurt. Exactly why I flew halfway round the world."_

"_Ha ha...don't be like that Serena," Shoichi laughed awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck._

_Byakuran was bored. He had an elbow on the table, head in his palm. __Where ever he looked, he just saw human beings. Ordinary humans. A child. A parent. A couple. It was somehow all the same to him._

"_Ah, I totally want to get that weird popping thing again," his acquaintance Terry Luck said wistly. "What's your favorite topping?"_

"_Marshmallows," he smiled cheerfully. A false smile, not that anyone ever noticed. "With strawberry yoghurt. And you?"_

"_Green tea. Why would I choose anything else?" she sighed, faceplanting onto the table. "Damn. They're so slow."_

"_Hm, how much longer do you think we have to wait, Terry-chan?" _

_She made a face. "The rest of our lives." _

"_Oi, I'm pretty deaf, but I still heard that!" _

_They both turned to see a bag dumped on the table. Byakuran sat up straight, on guard. The bag had almost crushed his head, after all. A girl. Short white hair. Grey eyes. Not tall, not short. And her expression towards him...was disgust. Granted his appearance wasn't too formal - he knew he was what girls classified as 'hot'. It was the first time Byakuran had ever felt...self-conscious. _

"_Was it not you who told me to direct insults to the face, because it's more honest?" Terry muttered darkly, arms crossed._

"_You're not honest. Watching you try is insulting." The girl cleared her throat. "Well, I'll go grab some frozen yoghurt for all of us, yeah?" _

"_You sure?" Shoichi muttered softly. "I mean, you just got here. And we're meant to buy froyo for you."_

"_I'm sure!" she called, already walking towards the self-serve machines. _

_Byakuran shook off his interest. There were plenty of weirdoes in the world. Being unusual didn't make then particularly interesting. "Sho-chan, who is that friend of yours?"_

"_Ah, that's - "_

"_Why don't you guess her name?" Terry offered. "You know, that cool thing you do all the time when you meet girls."_

"_That's creepy, Terry," Shoichi muttered. "I mean, remember when that girl called the cops on you, Byakuran-san?"_

"_It wasn't that big a deal, Sho-chan. A misunderstanding," Byakuran smiled. He didn't want to say that he'd already tried. And for once, he couldn't find the right face. What did that mean?_

_The girl returned with a tray. "Terry, could you push my bag onto the floor?"_

"_I've got it," Byakuran cut in with a smile, lifting the bag and gently putting it on the floor. Holy shit, it weighed a ton._

_For some reason, she shot him__ a dark look. "Green tea, Terry. Grape and jelly for Shoichi. And...you." She set down the cup in front of him, but paid no further attention. _

_Byakuran stared at his frozen yoghurt. Strawberry yoghurt with marshmallows. Chance? "Hm, what would your name be?" _

"_...Alex. Alex Knight."_

"_Serena, be honest," Terry cut in, before Byakuran could comment on the name. "Her name's Serena di Squalo. Mixed background. Travels around the world."_

"_Ossu, __Serena-chan." He extended his hand for a handshake. _

_Serena eyed his hand as if he had some sort of an infectious virus, and looked away. "Feeling's mutual, Byakuran." Though her face clearly said otherwise._

_And that confused him. How did she know his name? Maybe it was Shoichi? But his friend shook his head. __Byakuran smiled. It wasn't false. He was genuinely interested._

"That's the first time the two of you met."

I was awake in an instant. "Chicken guacamole!" On instinct, I sat up and tried to find a weapon. That voice...Alex Knight. Not my alias. That weirdo. What the hell was that?

Terry raised an eyebrow. "Calm your chicken farm woman. And guacamole's avocado based. You ran out of stamina and fell asleep when you were sparring with your bro."

"What?"

"You two were - "

"No no no, that's not important," I interjected. "Byakuran. The first time I met Byakuran. Where?"

She had to think about that one. "What brought that on? Well...I think it was at the university."

I sighed in relief. A dream. Just a dream.

"Hang on, it was a Sunday. That's right. Shoichi, him and me went to the airport to pick you up. We had froyo. It was so nice," she said hungrily, losing focus for a moment. "Why do you ask?"

"I-It's nothing. I was just uh...curious."

* * *

><p>"Serena-nee-san, shishō wanted me to tell you to - "<p>

"Hurry up, right?" I sighed, scrolling through the documents faster. Merone Base's detailed architectural design. Troop deployment. The Millefiore's hit list. Nice. If we were to launch an attack, we had all the information we'd ever need. Mukuro was actually serious. Wow. "He's been reminding me enough. I'll find a way. But tell him to piss off, he's distracting me."

Fran's face remained blank. "But shishō will stab me."

"Can you feel it?"

"It's mental damage. So not really."

"Forget it then." I shut my eyes in a futile attempt to block out all the puzzles I had to complete later. You know there's something wrong when you can imagine a tetris, candy crush or minesweeper game in your head. "You sound like we've each other for a long time, Fran. How did we meet?"

"Oh, shishō said I can't tell you," he shrugged. "If I tell you, it won't be a surprise."

Hang on. "Then how did you meet Mukuro?"

"It's the same surprise Serena-nee-san. Duh."

"Why was I with Mukuro when we met?"

"Sur-pri-se."

I scowled. Surprises. Who needs them.

* * *

><p>Sheep are terrifying. It's always a bad sign if you dream has sheep.<p>

Awake, I looked at my pitiful list.

7. Training.  
>8. Training.<br>9. Training.  
>10. Training.<br>11. Training.  
>12. Training.<br>13. Training.  
>14. Training.<br>15. Training is officially complete.  
>16. Vongola and allied families war meeting.<p>

At the crack of dawn of my sixteenth day in the future, I arrived at the main room, and sat on a couch. Stupid memories...of things that hadn't even happened... Ruined my night's sleep entirely. Apparently Bel wasn't a complete idiot; idiots didn't get sick.

"TO THE EXTREME!"

I fell off the couch. I knew that yell. "Ryohei? What the - "

"Hi Serena~!" Lussuria exclaimed, waving. I waved back, without the enthusiasm. So it was more like a lazy Hitler salute. "Ryohei-kun, you shouldn't wake up Boss."

Ryohei walked up to me, straight faced, arms folded. He nodded. "You look just like your older self, Serena. Still so short."

"Come on, I'm taller than..." I hesitated, "...Reborn." Knowing my arguments would be futile, I changed the topic. "So, what are you two doing up so early?"

"Well, we were training," Lussuria almost sang. "I was teaching Ryohei-kun some footwork. But he's coming to the meeting with us."

"Footwork to the extreme!"

...Yeah no.

* * *

><p>"Voi, this is madness," Squalo growled.<p>

Bel shrugged beside him. "This is _politics_."

I shifted my hood slightly. It was probably better to be more discrete. "Don't you mean Sparta?"

Picture this. Three hundred monkeys. Fighting for the last banana. And you'd only get a fraction of how disorderly the meeting had been functioning. People were punching each other, pointing guns, taking off their clothes, throwing things...urgh. And then, in the corner, you have Dino and Romario sitting peacefully like normal people.

"VVVVOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOIIIIIIIIIII!"

Well. That caught their attention. It may've also caused further damage to my ear drums.

Bel took a step forward, and threw a whole stack of knives. About twenty people died on the spot. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...traitors." Wow, his memory was good. Let me explain - Mukuro sent us the Millefiore's hit list. Logically speaking - those present at the meeting who weren't on it...were likely traitors. Or super super weak.

"It's the Varia!"

"Traitors? It can't be!"

"That's the Vongola Sun Guardian!"

_Gosh. Bit slow there. We've been standing here for three minutes. _Squalo frowned. "VOI! EVERYONE SIT DOWN!" There weren't enough chairs in the hall, so several quickly sat on the floor like elementary school students, looking anything but happy. Most of them were mafia bosses and high ranking people in their families, after all. "What the fuck are you pieces of trash doing?!"

A man stood up on the other side of the room. "As the Vongola's highest ranking officer, I believe that I should be the one asking you, Superbi Squalo," he hissed. "On what judgment do you have to kill anyone in this room?!"

Several people looked like they were in agreement with him, but they kept quiet under Squalo's glare. He raised the stack of papers in his hand. "We have the Millefiore's hit list. Those whose names have been neglected - you're either a traitor or too weak to fight. You have no power here, Vongola _Officer_."

"You have an equal standing with me!" the man argued back futilely. "Don't you dare talk to me in that tone!"

"VOI! I can talk to you in whatever fucking tone I like!" People's heads were whipping back and forth, trying to keep up with their argument. It was like some tennis match.

Turning back, I whispered to Lussuria. "Hey, does that guy actually do anything important?"

"No, he's more of a figurehead," he whispered back. "He hates the Varia."

Who doesn't? "I have a proposal!" I called out, sadly aware I was drawing attention to myself. "We have the Millefiore's hit list. The person in this room with the highest ranking should be the chairman of the meeting."

"Yeah!"

"I agree!"

The Vongola guy scowled. "Very well. I trust your sources."

Bel scrolled through the list. "That'd be Dino Cavallone."

Across the room, Dino made a weird sound. He stood up and straightened his coat. "It's an honorable position, but I don't have the intel or equipment to make any decisions. So I pass the position to Squalo."

"Hey! That's not fair!"

"Why didn't you choose me?!"

"You'll pay for this, Cavallone!"

"I'll declare war on you!"

The chatter's volume began to rise exponentially.

"ENOUGH! EVERYBODY SHUT UP!" I roared, almost losing my voice from the shout. "IF DINO CAVALLONE CHOOSES SQUALO, THEN DON'T FUCKING GET IN THE WAY."

"Who the hell are you?" someone scowled.

"I'm with him! You've probably got some really low rank, you bastard!"

I walked up to the nearest table, and jumped on top. Fuck this shit. I pulled down the hood. "My name is Serena di Squalo. Ranked first on the Millefiore's list. If you refuse to listen to Squalo, then I have, by all means, the right to lead this meeting."

"You're meant to be dead...!"

"It's not possible!"

I lit a single ring and opened a storage box, casually playing with a handgun. "I can shoot you and let you make the judgment of reality again."

Silence.

"Alright then. Let's begin," I smiled, as warmly as I could. Which was pretty coldly, actually. "As you all know, the Millefiore has called a Vongola hunt. Everyone in this room, is on that list – I can assure you, by the end of the month, over half the people in this room will be dead."

"That is an outrage! The Vongola is not so weak!" A different guy stood up, all formal like.

"Who are you, another Vongola top branch asshole?" I commented. "Let me tell you something. Do you know how many people have been killed in the past week? Do you?"

"H-hundreds," he stuttered. "But they were weak!"

I glared. "Thousands. Thousands who have the same resolution as you or me. How many here have rings or boxes? Basically nobody," I shrugged. "All Millefiore fighters are armed with the best technology. Pure strength and skills are no longer the only traits that determine the result of a battle. We, as the Vongola and alliance families are inferior among numbers and weapons."

"What are you saying? What are we supposed to do?"

Oh. My. God. Another Vongola top branch. These people were like rabbits. "Bastard, with no due respect, all of us have only three choices. First – we give up and work under Millefiore filth. Secondly, we can run. We will not survive," I added in a matter-of-factly tone. "Which leaves us with a final choice. We fight."

"Wait, hang on," Dino interrupted, standing up. "You just said our numbers and weapons are inferior to the Millefiore. It'd be a complete slaughter!"

"The one advantage we have is surprise," I announced. Motioning at Terry, I got off the table. She set up a hologram and started talking about the Millefiore's forces – their numbers, whereabouts and abilities.

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...nice, dumbass."

"Fuck, that's terrifying," I murmured. "I don't know what shit my future self did, but in the past, half those people want me dead."

Squalo ruffled my hair. "Chill. Just go through what we've discussed. It'll be fine."

Terry finished up, and I resumed my position on the table. "Now, if we were to attack, we don't have time. I suggest we attack in six days."

"Five days? That's preposterous! It's too soon!"

"I said _six_."

"That's still ridiculous!"

Bunny number four. They were really testing my thin patience. "We _do not_ have the luxury of time."

"But we cannot attack in six days! We need to gather weapons, people - "

"And what do you propose?" I asked sharply.

He looked around nervously, trying to see if people would agree with him. "I-I say we run! We'll wait a few months, maybe a year before we make a strike! Pass some time!"

"If we won't last a month, how we last a year?!" I yelled, aware that my rings were spontaneously lighting. Well, I knew it was a bad idea to wear them. The rings worked with my emotions. At times like this, it was a little hard to control. Whispers started around the room.

"Then what's the point? We're losing. They're winning. This is a war we won't win. If we run, we might still survive!"

Deep breath. Breathe in. And out. In. And out. This was like, bunny five, right? "There is no such thing as winning. There is no such thing as _losing_. There is only, won, and lost. While even _one_ of us is still alive, we have not lost! What are you, a coward?!"

"Cowards survive!"

"COWARDS COWER. DO YOU WANT TO LIVE THE REST OF YOUR LIFE LIKE A PIECE OF FUCKING SCUM?!" Holy shit. I just borrowed a line from Xanxus. Bad sign.

"Then what do you suggest we do, Serena?" Dino asked.

I calmed down a little. "In six days, the Millefiore's main force will all be within three miles of the Vongola HQ. We take two birds with one stone. An attack on Merone Base, the Japanese branch will occur at the same time. Simultaneous confusion. This is the only chance we will ever have to inflict heavy damage on the Millefiore."

The people in the room were whispering among themselves, unsure. It was risky, obviously.

"Hang on!" Urgh. They must've mixed rabbit DNA into their own. No other explanation. "I've heard about the attack force in Japan. Even if the rumor is true – they're inexperienced. They can't possible defeat the Japanese branch!"

Tired, I lowered my voice. "The Varia will attack in six days. Whether you join us in name of the Vongola, is your choice," I declared. Turning my back on them, I shrugged. "But at least we'd give you a gravestone. When the Vongola wins this battle, there will be no room for cowards."

* * *

><p>Ryohei left for Japan immediately. By the time he arrived, we'd only have five days left. I remembered to tell him to look for Chrome at least.<p>

Xanxus, the Varia Officers and Terry were sitting around the table. We were holding a meeting of our own. Oddly enough, it was a lot more civilized than what I'd anticipated. "So, Terry, you're going to Japan?" I asked. "Why?"

"I'm a technician. The Varia's got plenty here, so I'll go help at the Vongola guys in Japan," she decided. "And plus, Shoichi's at Merone Base, right? I need to give him a good beating."

Love. Urgh.

"She's not going alone," Xanxus spoke up.

Fran sighed almost solemnly. "You know, no matter how I look at it, we're going to have to send someone to Japan. Their numbers are too low for an infiltration. They're going to die miserably."

"And that person can come with me to Japan," Terry summarized. "Excellent. Who?"

Squalo caught my attention. "You have a box weapon in Japan, Terry needs an escort to Japan, the brats are from the past as well, and they'd probably need help. Do you know what that means?"

Geography. I tried to remember which countries were further. "Xanxus, I request to go to Brazil until the Millefiore burns up and dies."

"Request denied, scum."

Their eyes were all trained on me. Ah fuck it. "Why do I have to go?" I sighed irritably. "I'm no good at sneaking around. Obviously someone like Fran would be better."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...we need an illusionist."

Oh. So you don't need me? "For an infiltration, low numbers are required. Too many chefs spoil the potatoes."

"It's spoil the broth, Serena-nee-san."

"That's not the point!" I argued. "They're annoying."

"You're annoying."

"...Fine. I get it. I'll go to Japan," I said sourly.

"Alrighty! Serena can go with Terry-chan," Lussuria laughed.

"Well then, let's go," Terry declared, fist bumping with Xanxus. I stared. Did no one else seem to think that there was something severely wrong with that? "We haven't got all day."

"_Now_? Like, now now?!"

"I packed," Squalo muttered, motioning to a small suitcase I'd noticed earlier. I should've known that Squalo wouldn't use such a flamboyant suitcase.

Huh. So they'd already decided this beforehand? "Whatever." Terry started dragging me out of the room, talking nonstop about what she was looking forward to.

_Sayonara, Italy. Ciaossu, Japan._

Bel stared as the two girls left the room. "Oi, Captain, dumbass is Varia. She should stick with us. We'd guarantee her safety at least. Those weaklings from the past won't do jackshit."

"Ah, Bel, acting all protective," Lussuria crooned.

"Shut up, Lussuria."

"Bel-sempai's right," Fran pointed out. "We're low in numbers. The allied families are more or less like kitty cats without rings and boxes."

"And it's not like she can master her box animal in five days," Levi grunted. "The brats in Japan should be fine on their own."

Squalo glared. "Voi. The point of the attack is to destroy as many Funeral Wreaths as we can and draw out Byakuran. That fucker Byakuran did something to Serena. This time, that piece of trash is going to have to go through all of us first."

* * *

><p><strong>OMAKE: Fist Bump<strong>

Xanxus would never forget the first time he set foot into the Vongola mansion. At the time, he was only twelve years old. Up until that point, he'd lived his life in poverty; and he silently marveled the grand nature of the room – everything from the carpet, to the chandeliers, to the portraits on the wall.

"Xanxus, this way."

He looked up, realizing he'd fallen behind. "Sorry Sir."

The older man bent down, smiling warmly. "I'm your old man now. No need to be so formal."

"Of course...Ninth."

It'd take some time, huh? His father straightened up, and walked into a huge room. "My office is over there. I need to talk with your aunt and uncle, so wait quietly out here, okay?" There was another girl, sitting in the room, and the Ninth waved and smiled kindly as he passed.

Xanxus sat down in the furthest seat from the girl. She was really just a little kid. Five years old. Maybe younger. Asian facial features. And she _stared_.

So he did the logical thing. And stared back.

It was a while before Xanxus realized she wasn't afraid of his stare, or his red eyes. The girl pointed at her own eyes, at him, and then threw a thumbs up.

And so they bonded. When the meeting's finished, their parents found them having a staring competition.

* * *

><p>With time, the Ninth had noticed that Terry and Xanxus had become very close. So he decided to get Xanxus to teach her Italian.<p>

"It's fratello, trash. Say it properly."

"Trash?"

"No, fratello."

"No fratello!"

"I'm telling you to say 'fratello'! Just fratello, trash!"

Terry looked fearful before speaking. "...Fratello is trash?"

Xanxus facepalmed. Lesson zero. There was now, a lesson zero. He pointed to himself. "Xanxus."

She did the same. "Xanxus."

"No, my name's Xanxus."

"No, my name's Xanxus."

*Facepalm*. "Stop copying me, brat."

His tone was sharp, and she bowed in apology. When she looked up, she smiled. "Terry."

"Is your name Terry?"

"Terry. Rock." She hesitated with the second word. "Ruck. Luck."

Xanxus raised his hand. The girl looked away, eyes squeezed shut. "Tch. Calm down." He took her hand, and tried to open it.

He failed miserably.

Was it...that she thought he was going to slap her? She had a rough past, too, then. So instead, he gently bumped his fist with hers.

"Fratello Xanxus is trash!" she grinned.

And unfortunately, Xanxus did not get through to her.

* * *

><p>Once, the Ninth had exited his office just in time to see Terry walk up to Xanxus, fist raised. The Ninth frowned. <em>A violent child? I didn't sense it. I wonder what Xanxus will do.<em>

The children fist bumped.

Adorable.

* * *

><p><strong>OMAKE: You Can Count On Me<strong>

"Hey Bel."

"Hn."

"I know a song that describes your teeth perfectly."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...do you, now?"

I cleared my throat. "Yeah, uh huh – you know what it is, black and yellow, black and yellow, black and yell - "

Bel's face twitched, and much slower than usual, magically produced a knife in his hand. "You want to die, don't you, dumbass?"

"You shouldn't move; you're sick," I chided. And then I smirked. "The almighty prince is still just a measly human, after all." Bel glared. "I'm joking! But I'm stuck with you until you get better, so hurry up and sleep it off."

"How the hell am I meant to sleep knowing _you're _the night guard?"

"Nice and soundly."

I admit though, it was a terrible place. We were in an alleyway – Bel was now the most wanted person in the country. Conveniently, I had been the closest Varia member to him, so naturally, I spent half the fucking day tracking him down, and the other fucking half trying to 'look after' him. There wasn't much you could do in a cold, dark, rainy alleyway. Well, Bel had the milk crate to sit down on, at least.

So it was going great. If it was opposite day.

"How do you feel, Bel?" I muttered. "Better or worse?"

"Cold."

I felt his forehead. Well, the hair covering his forehead. "You're still burning up, phony prince. Here, drink some more water. And take a pill while you're at it." I gave him the bottle, but he seemed incapable of screwing off the cap. With a sigh, I opened it for him and passed the pill. "Drink up."

He emptied the bottle and dropped it to the side. "Oi dumbass, how long do I have to hold up this umbrella?"

"As long as you want to stay dry," I informed. "How do you feel?"

"You asked that a minute ago."

With a sigh, I slipped off my coat and put it around his shoulders. "Warmer?"

"Slightly."

_Well, at least I'm not freezing my ass off for nothing then_. And hell, the coat was the only waterproof thing I had. I needed a distraction.

"If you're tossin' and you're turnin' and you just can't fall asleep,  
>I'll sing a song beside you.<br>And if you ever forget how much you really mean to me,  
>Every day I will - "<p>

"What do I mean to you, dumbass?"

I stopped. "Hm? No no, I was just quoting Bruno Mars."

"But what do I mean to you?"

"Tch, that's pretty random, Bel. I suppose," I considered, "you'd be like the devil on my shoulder. It's not quite right if you're not there, but you're not necessarily a good thing, you know?"

He didn't reply.

Meh. "You can count on me, like one two three..."

* * *

><p>The following morning, I felt terrible. Like I was sick or something. Bel's fever went down, and he'd actually slept quite a fair bit. The sun was about to rise, so I woke him up. "Bel. Get up."<p>

"Huh?"

"It's morning. We gotta move. How do you feel?"

"Better."

Excellent. He stood up, and I took my coat back. "Ah man, I cannot _wait_ to get back to Italy."

"Dumbass, your clothes are wet," he noticed.

"Well, you had my coat and the umbrella, and it only stopped raining like ten minutes ago, _dumbass_." I rolled my eyes. And sneezed. Once. Twice. Thrice. Ah shit.

"Oi oi, did you stay up the whole night?"

"Two words. Night. Guard. Now - _night_."

"You're sick." He summarized it in two words...better.

"No, I'm not."

He felt my forehead. "No, you're definitely sick."

I sniffled. _And who's God damn fault is that? _"I did my job. Let's go back."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...oh no we're not. Now, I'm stuck with _you_. We can't leave till you're normal."

"You look awfully happy," I scowled. "Pretty unusual for a phony prince."

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...you can count on me. I'll pay you back tenfold for what you made me go through."

* * *

><p>Really, it was torture.<p>

"~Ushi shi shi shi~...open wide, dumbass."

"I can eat by myself," I growled, reaching for the spoon. Bel beat me to it.

"Say 'ahhh'."

"Never. I'd rather starve."

"What a shame, I'll have to call Boss and tell him you need another day of recuperation, ~ushi shi shi shi~..."

Another day? ANOTHER DAY? Without a doubt, Xanxus would just go 'fine, whatever', and I'd be stuck with Bel for another God forsaken day. "Well then. 'Ah.' I'm hungry."

"It's not 'ah'. It's 'ahhh'."

BIG DIFFERENCE. "Ahhh," I muttered. Just when I was about to take a bite –

Bel moved the spoon. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...dumbass, it's up here."

"Tch. Ahhh..."

He moved it again. "~Ushi shi shi shi~...too slow."

RAGE. I swear. Next time I get a call that Bel's in trouble, I'm just going to take a picture and _leave_.

But you know what? It was two weeks before we returned to the Varia HQ. And Bel stuck with me for every single one of those two weeks.

Just like a creepy stalker. Nothing more, nothing less.

* * *

><p><strong>Yeah, that was weird. <strong>**  
><strong>

****9x – 7i [greater than sign] 3(3x – 7u). Hm, I wonder what you get if you simplify it? :3****

**This will likely be a BelXOC fic. Uh...Xanxus wasn't on the list, but the idea is noted.**

**The lone green leaf has a good point, the vocaloid song 3331 is pretty suited to Serena's character *strokes imaginary beard*. Shirokuromokona, your thoughts are accurate. Almost word for word for what I had in mind, as you saw =_="**

**Many of you were quite interested in Byakuran and Serena's 'relationship'. Um. It's actually pretty disappointing, personally. Did Bel ever find out? Yes. What did he do? Oh nothing really, except burn down half a city.**

**Anyways, thanks for the support up till now, it's much appreciated :D**

****Anyways, have a nice day, ciao~ :]****


	30. I Want Answers

**I wrote this over a span of a month so...I have no idea what happens in this chapter any more =_=**

**Bel's message was pretty easy, right? Unfortunately, he doesn't show up in this chapter. It is kinda getting serious, unfortunately. Not enough humor in this chapter - personally.**

**Anyways, thanks to those who reviewed, alerted or favorited. I would've given up otherwise :D**

**Please enjoy?**

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 30 - I Want Answers<span>

Mukuro.

It was nothing more than a three syllable Japanese name – no, a _word -_ that meant 'corpse' or something. And it was also the current reason why I was lying in the fucking Japanese sun.

Alone.

With a headache.

In the middle of a desert with vultures circling my unconscious body, and then a cougar pops up and suddenly goes 'ohayo, my fellow fishy friend' –

Yeah...no. The last bit was only half-true at best. In reality, sprawled halfway up the stupid, pointlessly long staircase that lead to Namimori Shrine - with a bunch of suitcases, it was hard not to feel a little animosity for the fruit haired jackass. Not too far away, Terry was battling with her sais (I could tell from the occasional blood splatter) but I was a vegetable.

Oh. Did I mention the bunch of Millefiore people trying to kill both Terry and I? No? Well now you know.

I'd been involuntarily facing the sky for so long, I could only see white, eyes open or shut. And then a door appeared in the white light. I didn't even get how that worked, but there was some super annoying person banging the fuck out of it. _I doubt that's God. Why would he even want to get out of heaven? Because he doesn't. Ten bucks - it's Mukuro. And he's probably getting beaten by Byakuran or something._

Reaching forward, I opened the door. It swung inwards, and a shadow swept through my vision. The shadow was shaped like a pineapple. I lost to curiosity and poked my head in.

There was no satisfaction. It was literally a bare room with a vase of white flowers on the floor.

"Assassin! Move!"

The voice broke my trance, and I jumped back as the door disappeared with a pop. "Mukuro? Is that you?"

"Ku fu fu fu..."

_Oh yes. Such a reliable response._ A yes or no was obviously too dull for a flashy guy like him. Coming to reality, I blinked and rubbed my eyes. Once. Twice. Thrice. Black. Why could I only see black? Sitting up, I could feel the stairs, the warmth of the sun, and the light breeze. "Terry?"

"I'm a little busy!" she called back. "Stay put!"

_I can't see. I'm blind. I'M BLIND. Calm down. Chill._ Find a happy place. Somewhere with potatoes. Lots of potatoes. Don't panic. PANIC. OH MY FUCK.

"DUCK!"

Quack? Something crashed into my shoulder, and I tumbled down around three flights of stairs.

Taste. Smell. See. Hear. Feel. I'd burnt my tongue on tasteless airplane food. The weather difference from Italy and Japan had left me with a runny nose. My sight was gone. My hearing had never been top-notch. And stairs really, really hurt.

If only Squalo were here to knock some sense back into me. Ha ha.

"Behind you Serena!" The urgency in Terry's voice got through. I did a vague back kick, and felt relief as my foot hit flesh. The cry of pain asserted that I'd managed to get something vulnerable. Carefully, I crawled up a few stairs. _Higher ground. That's always worth something._

It was a great idea, until my hand touched something...un-step-like. It was like...leather. Regardless, jerking back, I desperately tried to regain what little balance I had by flapping my arms wildly. Something caught my wrist, and pulled me onto stable ground. _This person doesn't seem hostile_. "Who are you?"

Silence.

"Oi!" Terry's voice panted, not too far away. "Now would be a great time to get her out of here."

_...Who is this?!_ I felt myself being yanked up (feet first, for some reason), and the person starting running. "What the - ! Get a grip, I'm fine! Put me down!" Actually, they already had a hell of a grip.

Silence.

I twisted my body, fumbling for a box weapon. "If you move, I'll bite you to death," a deep voice shot back, dropping me on the floor. It's hard to say which was more of a surprise.

* * *

><p><strong>Five Days Till Attack<strong>

"Sun flames don't really do much for bruises and swelling, so I can't help you there," Ryohei's voice instructed. "As for your eyes..."

"Am I blind?" I muttered. "Permanently?"

"It's temporary," a new voice chipped in. Terry. "It'll probably last a day. A week at worst. Honestly, what type of idiot stares at the sun?!"

"I told you. I fainted from dehydration with my eyes open," I retorted.

It wasn't difficult to picture her scowling. "That's not even humanely possible. And how do you not recognise Hibari Kyoya from the leather of his shoes? Honestly! And why would you ask somebody you don't recognise 'who are you'?! Stranger danger!"

"Instinct."

"The day your instinct is actually right – is the day when it start raining skittles."

"Well then, we both know the weather forecast today," I muttered under my breath. "Thanks for saving my ass, anyway."

"Yes," she considered. "Thank me more often. It feels great to be thanked. But how the hell did the Millefiore find us? It doesn't make any fucking sense. We covered all our tracks."

"Well, if you'll have to march to Merone Base if you wanted to find the answer to that," Ryohei pointed out. "All in good time."

There was a knock on the door, and vaguely, I heard it slide open. "Ciaossu. Do you mind if I talk to Serena alone?"

"Let's go Ryohei," Terry muttered, "we're not wanted."

"Rest to the extreme!"

"Ha ha...thanks Ryohei," I laughed awkwardly. Reborn started talking after they left.

"So, Serena. I heard from Ryohei that you were with the Varia."

Huh. So he was just going to get straight into the interrogation. "You heard correctly?"

"Tell me everything."

_...He means just in the future, right?_ "This is my seventeenth day in the future. I woke up in pink smoke, and for some reason, I was at Vongola HQ in the height of winter," I added bitterly, shivering at the memory.

"If today is your seventeenth day," Reborn mused, "then that area should've been Millefiore territory."

"It was. The Varia just happened to be doing recon, and we...bumped into each other," I shrugged. "A few days later, the Cavallone family was under attack, so I helped Dino a bit."

"Well, it's not like that idiot student of mine would die so easily," Reborn said _seemingly _proudly. The guy never seemed to _actually_ be proud of his hardworking students. "Is he doing well?"

"Rather. Well, he's mansion-less now, and still under attack from the Millefiore," I sighed. "Anyway, I spent some time getting the hang of flames."

"That's quite a few rings I see."

With a sigh, I lit my flames and raised both hands. To be honest - there were times when I felt self-conscious for wearing ten rings. Three on my right - used specifically for fortifying weapons - storm, rain, lightning. For the sake of multitasking, on my left, I wore all seven rings, doubling up on my index and middle finger.

Reborn's silence oozed curiosity. "That's almost impossible. Which is your dominant flame?"

"Uh...depends on my mood."

We sat in awkward silence. "Serena, I want to discuss what happened on that parent visitation day."

"Hold whatever grudge you want."

"Though on the contrary, I think it was a noble thing to do."

"I know, my fault, I screwed up – ...wait, what?"

"You put duty in front of loyalty or your own safety," Reborn explained. "That's rather noble. But that is rather rotten luck."

_So...you believe that it's my duty to get shot by my boss? Geez, that's very logical._ According to a number of sources (well, I was kinda vague, so I hoped we were on the same page), I'd set off laughing gas, knocked Bel and Hibari unconscious, and gotten shot by Xanxus. And well, not very many people survive being shot by a ball of fire and a burst appendix, so I was pretty savvy with my luck. And I told Reborn exactly so.

"Quite the optimist, aren't you?"

"No, I'm just an honest pessimist at heart."

"You'd make an interesting counsellor."

"Huh. Now that I'd like to see." _Not._

Lal Mirch studied Reborn's expression as he exited the dimly lit room. As usual, she couldn't interpret much from his passive face. "Well, is it her?"

"The Varia made no mistake, she _is_ from the past," he replied flatly. "But she's hiding something."

"So it's not just me. It sounds like she doesn't mind the future at all."

"She's not considering going back to the past; it's not because she likes the future," Reborn murmured, deep in thought. "I think she knows more about the future than she's sharing."

With a nod, Lal asked, "So can we trust her?"

"What choice do we have?"

* * *

><p>You know, I should've told Reborn I was joking. Actually, I think he knew I was joking. He's just mean.<p>

Gokudera sounded like he was having a hard time talking - I think he'd been staring at the wall for the past five minutes or so. "Oi, why the fuck are you even in the future?"

"Oh I'm sorry, I totally fucking got asked if I wanted to come here and - oh I don't know - decrease my life expectancy rate." I folded my arms defensively.\. "Anything else up for discussion?"

"You're blind."

"Temporarily, hopefully, but yes."

"Does...it hurt?"

"Stare at the sun for a while, and you'll get a very accurate answer," I scowled through clenched teeth. "You're not here out of the goodness of your heart; just cut to the cheese, Gokudera."

"Tch. You mean chase?"

"Same thing!"

"No, it's not."

"Are you testing my patience?" I warned, flexing my fingers.

He sighed. "You see – "

"Actually, I don't. I'm blind."

"Do you want me to talk or not?!" Gokudera took a deep breath, and started softer. "Look, I don't know what to do, Serena. My box weapon...I just...it doesn't make any sense. Juudaime...he's relying on me for the attack on Merone Base - Bianchi's supposed to train me, but we...we just...no."

_Sibling issues? Can't really help you there. You're the stubborn one. _"How have you been training with your box weapon?"

"In a training room, of course! Most of the boxes don't even open – and the ones that do – they're completely useless! How the fuck is that dormant piece of shit meant to help anyone?" he ranted.

What was I, a counsellor? Wait. I think I was at the moment. _Don't sound sarcastic. Don't sound sarcastic. _I sighed. "Come on, you're not a kid any more. How do you learn best?"

"This isn't like physics or something! I can't just - "

"What's wrong with pen and paper in a little silence? Nobody said you couldn't deal with theory and shit first," I interjected before he voice some excuse. "And FYI, Bianchi really is trying to help. She has better things to do than sass her little brother."

Gokudera was silent. And then he stormed out of the room. Lol. Stormed. He was fulfilling his guardian duty in one way then.

* * *

><p>Gokudera's visit reminded me of something.<p>

I still owed Tsuna an apology and explanation for the ring battle shenanigan. And everyone else. A proper one. Not like the half-assed one I'd given Reborn. _Might as well start practicing now, then._

"Tsuna, I'm really sorry."

That was crap.

"Sawada Tsunayoshi, I apologize for the traumatizing events of the ring battles and other events."

Too formal. And that sounded ridiculous.

"Tsuna, I want to apologize. I was completely responsible for the ring battles, the Ninth's involvement, Xanxus' appearance, the parent visitation day fiasco – everything. So I'm sorry."

...Too fluffy. Maybe I should work on the explanation?

Sigh. "Eight or so years ago, I told Xanxus about some hallucination I had about the Varia having a coup d'état. Creepily, he ended up actually basing the coup d'état against the Vongola family on that. Xanxus was frozen after that. About a month before the ring battles, the Ninth told me to unfreeze Xanxus, and solve all diplomatic problems that would ensue. I created the ring battles for that reason. I just...am sorry."

There was a knock. "Uh...Serena, can I come in?"

Tsuna? OMFG. SHIT. THESE WALLS ARE THIN, AREN'T THEY? "C-Come in," I finally stammered. "I wanted to apologize, for uh...I mean, the uh...the..." Mind block. At a time like this. God damn it.

"I – I heard."

Cough. "Oh. How much of it?"

"All of it."

...Oh. "I'm sorry. I was just practicing. And I uh...about the parent visitation thing..."

"Ah – it's fine Serena!" Tsuna laughed lightly. "I'm sorry for panicking. It was a misunderstanding, that's all."

Awkward silence. Wait, I was a counsellor now. "Tsuna, is there something on your mind?"

"Huh? N-no, I'm fine, really, Serena."

"Really?"

"Y-Yeah."

"You're lying."

It was Tsuna's turn to sigh. "It's that obvious?"

"You stutter when you're anxious," I pointed out. "What is it?"

"I yelled at Haru," he admitted. "It wasn't her fault. I was stressed, but it wasn't right. I'm trying to find her - but even if I find her, I don't know what to say."

Leaning back into the pillow, I yawned. "Tell you what Tsuna, just tell Haru how you feel."

"How I feel?"

"You're feeling guilty; you're sorry. You feel that it was your fault, right? Just tell her that. It's the truth, and it's what sounds good. Double points."

He seemed to grin. "Thanks Serena. I'll keep that in mind. Ah, Hibari-san wanted me to pass this to you," he remembered quickly, taking my hand and placing some sort of small cube in it. "He said not to open your box without him, unless you wanted to be...bitten to death."

_Box...weapon?_

* * *

><p><strong>Three Days Till Attack<strong>

Fortunately, my right eye recovered faster than my left, so I was really only half blind. Well, three-quarters blind, since my right eye was seriously short-sighted. It was enough to escape the confines of a stationary piece of furniture.

"Lambo! Give back my sausages!" I moved to grab his foot, but my hand-one eye coordination was just shameful. So instead, I dramatically grabbed a glass of juice.

Kyoko looked apologetic. "I'm sorry Serena, we're out of sausages."

"No worries." I looked around the empty table. "Where is everybody? I found some crap in my luggage for Yamamoto. And Terry needs to rant to Bianchi about something."

"Bianchi's doing laundry, Fuuta's watching Chrome, Giannini's working on security," Reborn commented. "The guys are all training. What do you have for Yamamoto?"

"Some Sword Emperor skit," I passed off. Squalo packed it in my suitcase – I doubted it was for me. "It should help his training."

Reborn smirked, accepting instantly. "Of course."

"Oh, that's right Serena! Onii-san said you came from Italy!" Kyoko remembered, smiling. "Was it nice there?"

"Tsuna-san mention something about that..." Haru agreed.

"Well, there were a lot of Mille - " Reborn almost choked on his tea " – feuille pastries. I'm sorry I couldn't bring any over. But I've got some clothes in my room that don't really suit my taste, if you want any." I smirked in his direction. _  
><em>

* * *

><p><strong>Two Days Till Attack<strong>

Emails. They literally didn't change at all in ten years.

I scowled, rereading my message to Solte for the third time.

**Wassup dude,**

**Figured out the box weapon. Is it meant to be really violent and disobedient? Any tips? Can box weapons die? Do box weapons regenerate with more flames and stuff? The weather's nice in Japan. How's things on your end?**

**Lucky 13.**

Bianchi peeked over my shoulder. "Come on, some privacy, Bianchi?"

She shrugged with a grin. "I actually thought I'd get some dirt on you. It's been a while since I've heard that nickname of yours. You figured out that weird box weapon already?"

*starts rant*

Well, it hadn't been too hard to figure out my box weapon. Now that I could see - it was basically a rubik's cube. Since there were only six faces - thus only compatible for six flames - the sky flame had been omitted. I hated it anyway. Not only was it useless; it gave me something in common with Xanxus. Urgh.

Anyways. The box had a similar movement to a Rubik's cube – so each face could have any combination of colors/flames. The difficulty was matching the right colors and flames. An extra flame or an excluded flame would have the result of...a pointless box. And then came the issues with the actual animal. I absolutely hated, detested, loathed, and despised wolves. All the animals in the world, and Solte chose a wolf? Honestly.

In addition to the list of things that made no sense was Hibari's instruction. Not that I ever planned to follow it - but it was weird. For a moment, I thought he might've actually cared for my safety or something. No, he probably wanted to have a fight.

*ends rant*

"Sort of," I finally admitted. "When I first opened it, the bloody thing gouged my arm, stayed when I stopped the flames, healed the wound by licking it – then went back to the box," I sighed. "Just...the hell is that supposed to imply?"

"The personality of a box animal relfects its master," Bianchi lectured. I sent the email, and swiveled round in the chair. "It's rash and considerate, just like you."

Tch. I looked over at the bed. "How's Chrome?"

"She's healing, slowly," Bianchi reassured. "Her conditions aren't too stable yet."

I nodded, staring at my box. "Well - " My box animal appeared. It just...appeared. Like it was part of a magic skit that didn't involve me. "WHAT THE HELL? GET BACK IN THE BOX!" It growled, and pushed me into the table, whipping it's tail of sun flames in my face. Strolling to Chrome, it nuzzled her face for a while before returning swiftly to the box.

"That's amazing," Bianchi murmured. "You didn't inject any flames, did you?"

"No! That's the thing – it just comes out on its own accord too!" Hopping off the table I groaned internally. A mess. I'd knocked over a cup of tea, stacks of paper, glass, and Chrome's belongings. "Unique or not, that thing annoys the crap out of me!"

"Those were sun flames, right? Chrome's vitals already look better."

Rash but considerate. Picking Chrome's clothes off the floor, I frowned. Was that...a transmitter?

* * *

><p>Hibari sipped his tea.<p>

I glared.

"I told you not to open your box weapon. It's difficult to control."

_Well, there's not much point telling me that now, is there? And the lecture isn't so effective AFTER you spent five minutes beating the crap out of me. _"Why am I wearing a yukata?"

His eye twitched. "I requested it."

"Why are my hands tied?"

"Otherwise you would take it off."

Fair point. "Why are my feet tied?"

"You would run," he answered, annoyed.

...Point taken. "Alright. But why is my hair tied up?" Well, it was kinda getting longer than I was used to. A consequence of the amount of sun flames I had been exposed to during training.

Hibari frowned, and sipped his tea. The cup never seemed to be empty. "It seems you're dominant arm is injured."

_DON'T CHANGE THE TOPIC, YOU FUCKTARD! _"Nah, Captain Obvious. It's just bruised and swollen with tonfa marks because I feel like it."

"You will be on defense during the attack."

...Huh? "HIBARI KYOYA. I SWEAR, I'LL TEAR OUT YOUR EYES AND LUNGS. I'M NOT PLAYING DEFENSE DURING AN ATTACK!"

"I'm joking."

"Don't joke! You don't joke!" Wait. But then if he was joking about joking, he'd still be joking. "Oh my God, you ate bad seafood, didn't you?"

*Sips tea calmly*. "You will be in charge of security tomorrow night. Terry Luck will rest up for the strike." Giannini took the day shift watching the cameras, Terry took the night shift. I knew that much.

"Hang on, I'm training tomorrow. If I do the night shift, I won't be able to sleep till after the attack against the Millefiore is over. That's...thirty six hours?!" I choked. "You're kidding!" Wait. Hibari didn't joke. "You're insane!"

"Hn. I suggest you rest well tonight."

* * *

><p>I couldn't sleep. Not a wink.<p>

There were only three explanations I could think of. One. Stress. Two. I was afraid of my dreams. Three. My current annoyance for Hibari had caused my body to instinctively do the exact opposite of his suggestion. But most likely, the reason was a mixture of the three.

Solte had replied to my email.

**Lucky 13,**

**It's your fault for misunderstanding your box weapon. To understand, you must first understand yourself. Look in a mirror. A dog is as loyal as its master is worthy. The weather is cold and wet. If you consider visiting, wear an extra few layers. We all send our regards.**

When I looked in the mirror, I saw a retard looking back. And that just totally explained everything. Cough.

The dreams hadn't stopped. To be quite frank, they were growing even more bizarre. Dino on some T.V dating show. The Varia receiving gold medals at the Olympic games. And _I _- fully conscious, fully sane - was hugging Byakuran.

And then there were all the questions I wanted answered. _Why am I in the future? _Well, I had to go to Merone Base and ask Shoichi that, huh? _What's this shit about Byakuran and me? _No idea. But I bet Shoichi knew. _How did I die? _Once again, Shoichi was the only one who would know. _Why the hell is everyone acting so...weird? _I had a feeling everyone knew, but only Shoichi would spill. _  
><em>

So that was it, wasn't it? I had to go to Merone Base. But even that seemed uncertain.

* * *

><p><strong>1 Day Till Attack<strong>

"Serena! Hey, are you okay?"

_Argh. I actually fell asleep. Shut up, shut up! _

"I'll carry you to a medical room!"

"M'fine," I murmured quickly, sitting up at my own pace. "Is it morning already?"

Yamamoto laughed. "Ha ha, yeah, I got up early. It's almost four now."

Four. "YAMAMOTO." I resisted the urge to scream. "That means I only slept for five minutes. Five! Why did you wake me? Actually, don't answer that. Well, I want to see what you've learnt since we last sparred."

He scratched his head sheepishly. "But your eye..."

I grinned, stretching my tired, non-existent muscles. "Oh, so you think I can't beat you with only one eye?"

"And your arm..."

"Urgh. Rephrase. You think I can't beat you with one eye and arm?"

Yamamoto laughed. "Ha ha! Yosh! I won't hold back then."

And you know what? Reborn was a demon. Yamamoto was demon spawn.

* * *

><p>It was probably midday when we took a break. As I healed our cuts and scratches with my sun flames, I felt my stomach rumble. Almost out of stamina, huh? "Alright Yamamoto, last round."<p>

"I'll beat you this time," Yamamoto replied cheerfully, walking across the room. "And I'll make you open that last box weapon."

We both charged at each other. Instinct played an important part, so it was a shame that mine wasn't very strong. On whim, I sheathed my sword, opened a storage box of bows and arrows using cloud flames and fired. Propagation. The arrows multiplied into a barrage. Yamamoto wouldn't be able to dodge that.

"Shigure Soen Ryu, Scontro di Rondine!" Ah. Damn. He perfected it in a day, huh? Yamamoto charged through, grinning like a maniac. I barely parried with the bow in time. My left hand, being weaker than my right, couldn't withstand his force, and the bow skitted across the foor.

Without both arms out of action, I slide tackled him – a move which I oddly learnt from Dino, a soccer freak. "It's not over," I assured Yamamoto, jumping up. He did the same a split second later.

We took careful steps around each other. "So, you'll open the last box weapon now, huh?"

"Wrong." I ran directly at him, empty-handed. He hesitated before swinging at my waist. Thankfully, it had been slow enough for me to jump high enough to get out of his katana's range, and get a nice kick in his chest. He grabbed my ankle with his other hand, and I went down with him.

_I'm so...tired... _Subconsciously, I aimed a strike at Yamamoto's face. Likewise, he aimed for my head. Except with a fricking sword.

"Enough!" Tsuna ran into the dojo with Reborn, huffing and puffing. "Reborn, isn't this going a little too far?"

"No, it's a good lesson."

We'd barely stopped in time. Man. I almost ruined Yamamoto's face. Putting bits and pieces together, I sat up with a groan. I knew for a fact that I could heal fast - but it didn't mean it didn't _hurt_.

* * *

><p>"0.00024%?" Ryohei gasped. "Is that really the success rate?"<p>

Terry and I were lying down in the room next to the meeting among Reborn, Lal, Kusakube, Hibari and Ryohei. Something about the predicted success rate of the Merone Base raid. "Terry," I whispered, "why are we peeping on this conversation like a bunch of immature kids?"

"You're still an immature kid Serena," she whispered back. "And we're not peeping. They're just loud."

"Well, why don't we just go in there and join them?"

Sticking out her tongue, Terry glared. "We weren't _invited_."

"I invite you, you invite me. There, we're covered."

"You see, Serena, that's not how an invitation works."

Kusakube was talking about one of the Varia's policies. Something about the 90% success rate and their quality. "Lol, that policy is so stupid."

"Serena, why don't you come out?" Reborn called out. Grudgingly, I slid open the door and crawled out on my knees, since both arms were more or less out of action. Terry stayed behind, suppressing her laughter. "Now, what were you saying?"

"What?"

"The Varia's policy?"

...I can't say that in their faces, can I? "Squalo made up the 90% success rate policy. It's to keep up standards and stuff. And so far, it seems to be working."

Ryohei looked down. Directionally and emotionally. "This is bad...if the Varia won't cooperate - "

"The Varia will cooperate! I swear it on my life!" I interrupted. They stared. Awkward.

"You seem enthusiastic about a battle," Lal noted. "Are you on drugs?"

_Drugs? Why do people always think I'm high? _"I-I mean, like, uh...since this is a battle of survival. It's not about something trivial like standards or pride, and the Varia does seem unusually bloodthirsty lately, so...yeah."

Reborn shrugged. "Seems legit."

* * *

><p>I yawned for the hundredth time.<p>

_Don't sleep. If I fall asleep, Hibari will make sure it's eternal. _Staring at the same monitors, second after second, minute after minute, hour after hour actually increased the number of suicidal thoughts.

Terry had gone off to the feast that Kyoko and Haru created, returned to Foundation, and fallen asleep. I assumed Hibari was asleep too. His written command was something like 'notify me the moment the first direct strike has been made'. Well, my Japanese wasn't good so, it could've also been something like 'recognise my first strike at the direct moment'.

So I stayed awake. Keeping watch. The room's lights were off too, so the only light source was the eerie glow of the monitors. It was about two in the morning when I first noticed the Millefiore soldiers moving around. Two hundred, three hundred maybe? Half an hour later, the majority of the cameras were destroyed. A few were well hidden, so I still managed to get the gist of what was happening. It didn't count as a direct strike yet, right?

Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. It was unbelievably annoying. Shoichi was in command, wasn't he? Gosh, he was slow. I explored the room; trying to find some measly source of entertainment. All I could find – was a book. Well, photo album. _Well well well, Hibari Kyoya has fluffy attachments to the past? How manly. _Unfortunately, the room was too dark to make out any of the photos.

At three, the Millefiore finally managed to group at some car park, and started digging with storm box weapons. _Now I get Hibari, right? _Turning, I screamed.

Four red lights. Some spiders had four eyes. If those were spider eyes, that was one fucking big spider. Like Harry Potter big.

"ARGH! FUCK! GO AWAY!"

It came closer.

_Fear is a choice_. _Fear is a choice. Ah fuck, that's can't possibly be a fluffy kitty cat!_ "AHHHHHH! THIS IS THE END. HOLD YOUR BREATH AND COUNT TO TEN." God damn it! Now wasn't the time for Adele. Wait. God. "GOD ALMIGHTY. IN THE NAME OF THE FATHER, THE SON AND THE HOLY GHOST - "

"Be quiet."

I stopped screaming abruptly. "H-Hibari...the s-spider will g-get you."

As he walked closer, I realized he was holding a cat by the scruff of its neck. Gokudera's cat. "Does this look like a spider?" he mocked lazily.

...I swear I'll kill you, Gokudera Hayato. Hibari's presence was surprisingly soothing, so I shook off the goosebumps. "The Millefiore have started digging. Estimated time till they reach your destination is...two hours."

"Hn. Keep watch, herbivore."

"Uh huh."

After a while, I calmed down. _ I...was not bitten to death. Shock, horror, gasp. _"I've only heard you scream in terror like that a handful of times," Terry murmured tiredly, trudging into the room with a pillow. "I wish I got that on video."

"Oh shut up. It's my turn to sleep."

* * *

><p>It took me a while to realize I was dreaming.<p>

_This was the office of the Vongola Tenth. Somehow, I just knew. _

_I looked down. My hands were covered in blood. My blood. I didn't have long left. Somehow, I just knew._

_It was faint, but gunfire resounded from outside the room. It was the coldest winter Italy had faced in years, yet the burning mansion would give little heat. Somehow, I just knew._

_My vision was hazy. Slowly, I raised the gun. "I'm sorry."_

_Tsuna froze on the spot, eyes wide. "No, Serena, stop!"_

_BANG!_

_I was an assassin. Somehow, I wish I didn't know._

"SHIT. TSUNA." Waking up, I panicked. That couldn't have possibly been real. _I killed Sawada Tsunayoshi. _Japan was really a bad place to be, huh? Maybe the weather was getting to me. _I killed Sawada Tsunayoshi. _

Terry looked at me oddly. "Serena, calm your farm. Tsuna just left for Merone Base. And Hibari's dealing with the Millefiore trash."

_I killed Sawada Tsunayoshi._ "I-I need to go for a walk," I murmured while getting up. What I needed was some time alone to think.

"Actually, you don't have time for that," Terry added abruptly. "Here. Put this on quickly. And eat this."

Argh. The dreaded brown pill. But it was necessary. Swallowing it quickly, she'd handed me a Varia summer uniform – the materials were just slightly thinner and lighter than the winter version. Turning to face the other way, I started stripping. "Wait, what's this for?"

"I have bad news, and good news. Which do you want to hear first?" she questioned typing rapidly on a computer.

"Give me the good news."

"You get to go to Merone Base."

I put on the coat. There. Changed. "I wasn't _invited._"

"You just were."

"Didn't Tsuna's party already leave?"

"Well that's the bad news." Terry cleared her throat. "Judging by the number of people Hibari's facing now, there's still way too many Millefiore people left in Merone Base. According to our data, anyway. We're going to need a distraction so they don't find Tsuna's party. Which is why we're sending you in."

"ME? What the hell am I meant to do?! I mean, I feel loved and all, but I don't know anything about Merone Base!"

"Well, thankfully, you'll be getting in through the front door," she added cheerfully. "Can't go wrong with that, right?" Before I could spout a list of arguments, Terry beamed. "I have the Varia on the line. After all, this plan's running a few hours early, so the attack won't be in sync any more."

Oh my fuck. Then isn't this a REALLY BAD SITUATION? Where the hell did the 'good news' even come from?! Looking up, I saw a lowly subordinate. "Hi. You. What is the current status of the Varia?"

The guy hesitated and looked over his shoulder. "Uh...I'm not sure how to answer that."

"Alright, get me Xanxus."

"But...but...Xanxus-sama is eating."

...What? "Xanxus can die in a fricking hole for all I care," I scowled irritably, "get me someone who actually knows what's going on."

Before he could answer, the screen flickered with static, and screams were heard. "Xanxus-sama! I'm sorry! Arrrgggghhhh!"

Well, that went well. When the static cleared, Xanxus staggered into the scene, holding a bottle of tequila. "Scum."

"Yo, Xanxus!" Terry greeted, hopping up into the camera's view. They fist bumped. Well, sort of. More like air bumped.

Damn it. I wasn't mentally prepared to talk to Xanxus yet. "Look, trashbag, just get me Squalo." _Wait. That's very rude. Extremely rude. _"I mean, Xanxus-chan." _Oddly, that's worse. _"X-Xanxus," I finally uttered, "we've just been attacked by the Millefiore, so our attack is going to occur earlier. You guys in Italy have to start your part of the mission now."

"Why should I assist them, scum?" Xanxus sneered. "I have no business with those trash."

My eye twitched. This certainly looked easier in my head. "YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT! I don't give a _crap _about what business you have, what _reasoning _you don't have, or what _intelligence_ you should have! In times like this, none of that matters! As a Vongola man, you have your duty to you family! The Vongola is one!"

Xanxus yawned and left. I was left panting and glaring at an empty room. "I FUCKING HATE THAT GUY! HONESTLY! SISTER, YOU GOT NO BLOODY MOJO!"

"Voi, and you say I'm loud."

Unfortunately, I was no longer paying attention to the screen, or for that matter, life. "AND I WAS LIKE, 'YO BRO', AND HE WAS JUST LIKE 'SCUM, SCUM, SCUM, TRASH, SCUM, SCUM."

"VOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOIIIIIIIIII!"

Nothing beats Squalo's voice. He should've joined one of those retarded T.V shows about voices. I didn't know if he had 'the voice', but he definitely had 'a voice'. And he wouldn't even need a microphone - saving electricity. "Squalo! Oh. Ciao."

He sighed, facepalming. "Dino's on his way to Japan. What's the situation over there?"

_Well, hate to be slightly negative - but that's kinda pointless, since it's half a day's flight and all._ "Shit happened; we've pushed up our schedule. You guys need to start within the hour, or there's no way in hell you're going to pull this off," I summarized. "How are the allied families?"

"They're already fucking late," he muttered, annoyed. He has his 'thinking' face on. "The Varia can go in alone."

"Didn't we already simulate that?" I complained. "If you barge through, you'll be surrounded. Now I'm sure you'd survive and all, but it wouldn't do much to draw out the Funeral Flowers people. And I haven't even started on how much trouble you'll have with Xanxus sitting in a tree with a glass of tequila or something."

"They're the Funeral Wreaths," he corrected. "And if we take back the Vongola HQ, we won't be having that issue."

"..." Yup. Squalo's smart. "Then when the allied families finally get their shit together, they'll help you clean up the Millefiore. Sounds like a plan," I grinned. "So, see you at the victory party?"

Squalo hesitated, frowning. "Serena...just...just..."

"Don't die?"

"Yeah, that. Be careful, okay?"

"I got it, I got it. Don't you go dying on me either, alright?"

"Right." We nodded in acknowledgement, and cut off the transmission.

Terry applauded. "Beautiful. But really, you don't have much time left. Put those on." She gestured to pair of contact lenses. "That pain-killer wears off in four hours. That's your time limit."

The contacts were utterly painful. Well, 'contact'. After all, I was still three-quarters blind. In the meantime, she slipped on an earpiece and a number of box weapons. I didn't have time to fully note which box was which, but I assumed they were mine. "Dude, these contacts really hurt," I murmured whilst wiping a stray tear.

"Grin and bear it Serena," she shot back quickly. "It's a head-up display. If there's something you need, ask and I'll project it. There's a video camera on that contact too, so it's your lifeline to me."

Oh. That's just so reassuring, isn't it? "See you in a few hours, I suppose then."

"Ditto."

Although I wasn't aware, it would be a while before I would see Terry again.

* * *

><p><strong>Omake - Pictures of You<strong>

Dino raised an eyebrow. "You know, Hibari, she knows you have that album. There's no point in hiding it."

"Hn." Hibari turned the pages, studying the photos slowly. A particular image caught his eye. It was one of himself, actually. Brandishing tonfas in his office. He almost smiled. Almost.

*flashback*

_It had been a particularly ordinary day at Namimori Middle. There was a knock on the door. "Sup?"_

_Urgh. He'd actually memorized her greetings. "Come in."_

_The door slid open, and before Hibari could react, there was a flash. Photographs? "For the school newsletter," she explained. _

_He took out his tonfas. "How dare you - "_

_Flash. "I'm done now Hibari. Bye bye."_

_"What was the second one for?" he demanded somewhat sourly. _

_"It's for me," she replied, shrugging. "This is how I want to remember you. Why would I want a picture of you looking like some herbivore, sitting at a desk doing paperwork?"_

_"...You're leaving."_

"_My time in middle school is up. And plus, my business in Japan is finished. Aren't you just overjoyed__?"_

_It was a joyous piece of information indeed. So why wasn't he happy?_

*end flashback*

* * *

><p><strong>Uh. If there's something you don't get, PM or review - I'll attempt to explain it in the next chapter. If it's really, really urgent, say so - because I'm really awkward and suck at replying to people...*coughs unnecessarily*. <strong>

**R&R, express your feelings towards this crappy fic, typos, things you'd like to see, that stuff, blah blah blah. Actually, I'm curious. Why would you like Serena to be paired with 'insert name'? As the author, I feel my decisions and reasoning are kinda biased :P_  
><em>**

**Anyways, have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	31. Lies

Chapter 31 - Lies

It's funny how fate works.

You see, I was having a real swell time causing a bloody mess in Merone Base – when I stumbled into a research facility's experiment. Literally...into. Dramatic floating, dramatic white flash – and BAM.

_Great. The floor just doesn't know how to forgive._

The sound of applause echoed around the room - which funnily enough, looked nothing like the one I'd just left. Parlor trick? "Congratulations Serena-chan. You're the first person to survive Flame Ring Teleportation System."

_Teleport...where...? _The voice paralyzed me. Actually, that was probably been the stun gun. _Byakuran...! _

Five or so guards (I was still a little dishevelled in spirit) disarmed me. All I could do was watch helplessly as they stole (I didn't think I'd get them back) my possessions and tossed them to one side. My coat stuffed full with box weapons – so it was understandable that they removed that altogether. But my shoes? Really? I mean, what possible danger did my oh-so-fearful shoes hold? Geez.

They pushed me onto a couch and left, just so I was frozen awkwardly beside Byakuran.

"Sorry about the shock; you do put up an annoying fight." His smile didn't falter. "Tea?"

See what I mean with fate? One moment you're breaking bones of strangers – and the next, you're 6000 miles away, having a tea party with someone who badly wants you to die in a hole.

Byakuran was still extending the teacup, so I decided not to leave him hanging. My motor skills hadn't exactly returned, so in a shaky attempt to accept, I emptied the steaming contents on my head (somehow). I'd barely slept in three days, eaten in two, was stunned (physically and mentally), didn't have any shoes, and was now covered in boiling high quality Japanese green tea. Just fucking _brilliant_.

With a cheery grin, Byakuran took a handkerchief and dropped it in my lap. "It's funny, Serena-chan. I recall seeing your dead body myself." He held up a bag. "Marshmallow?"

_Well, you certainly know how to treat a girl. _It took a few tries to make a sound other than a meaningless grunt. "I'm from the past. Though I doubt it news."

He savored his heavenly delight. "My my, it looks like Sho-chan disobeyed me after all."

_Argh, he already knew right? _"Pfft. Our Sho-chan's too goody two-shoes to do that."

"Hm, really? Well then noot-noot important factor tootity toot toot - "

I'll admit my mind wasn't all to focused on him. What were the lines I'd heard the scientists in Merone Base say? _Come on, an epiphany would be much appreciated. _"Potatoes." _...Wrong epiphany. _"Rough weather here in Italy."

"Global warming," Byakuran acknowledged, pausing whatever he'd been rambling about. The guy was as jovial as a seagull with a potato chip."Well? Will you consider the opportunity to be a part of my family?"

"...What?" _He means the Millefiore family, right? Not like…yeah._

Byakuran crossed his legs and set down his teacup. "Consider it, Serena-chan. You live as a dog of the Vongola. You've never been able to do what you want."

I held back a sarcastic laugh. _You're just restating the bliddy obvious._ "Serve the Vongola, serve you. What's the bloody difference? The uniform? Let me make this very clear - "

There was a knock on the door, and someone burst in. "Byakuran-sama!"

Byakuran's cheerful aura disappeared in a flash. "What?"

The messenger gulped. "It's the Varia. They've attacked the Vongola HQ group. The commander there - "

"Get out," Byakuran commanded coldly, and I felt like I'd overheard something I shouldn't have. So I got up and hobbled around the room, observing, since the effects of the stun gun had worn off enough.

"Back on topic, Byakuran, you're aware I have commitments to the Varia as well as the Cavallone family, yes?"

"Do forced commitments actually mean anything? Ask yourself."

Oh hell, Byakuran was making a lot of sense. He didn't make a move as I rifled through my possessions, so I randomly fished out a box from my jacket pocket. Attacking him wasn't exactly my intention, so to avoid provoking him, I left the rings alone. They were only B ranked rings anyway. "Fortunately for me, if the commitment includes cooperating with you, I'd have to decline."

Oh look. He wasn't so merry any more. "I can break you as many times as I need to."

"Is that a threat?"

"Maybe."

The scientists had said something about having enough fiamma volts for two trials. That meant the teleportation system thing was still good for one more run, right? "I gotta say, you Millefiore guys have a great science department and hygiene protocols. I'm impressed. What would my pay roll be?"

"You're not in it for money. Let's be serious here, Serena-chan."

"It's hard to think without my shoes. Cut me some slack," I muttered, viewing an abstract painting on a wall. "What job would you have me do? Assassin? Doctor? Engineer?" Casually, I made my way to the area set up for the Flame Ring Teleportation System. The controls seemed easy enough to understand.

"Whatever you want," he shrugged, serious, but not angry. "It's not so much that I need you - I'd prefer not killing you to decrease the Vongola's power."

And for a brief moment, I considered it. Throwing away everything I had, everything I believed in, just to give up and start again. Doing whatever I wanted, forgetting commitments, being a dog…it was tempting. Angrily, I pushed the selfish thoughts away, and the moment ended.

"Byakuran, what type of a person do you think I am?"

He looked in my direction with a raised eyebrow. "Intelligent enough to make a smart choice."

I paused. "Well, 'smart' is a matter of opinion." Quickly entering the first set of coordinates that had come to mind into the controls, in an instant, I started floating. _Wait, wait, I don't want to go there!_ Byakuran had gotten up and lit his ring, and the controls were already out of reach.

Byakuran glared, throwing something as light blinded me. "You can't run."

_I can hide._

* * *

><p>"Serena..."<p>

_Urgh. Why am I dreaming at a time like this? _

"Serena..."

"What?" I muttered, irritated, searching through space.

"I am your father."

Facepalm. "...Alex, you're a girl."

She shrugged as she came into view. Dressed like Jack Sparrow, I noted she was only missing the dirt and grime. "Did you miss me?"

"Please go away. I'm busy," I concluded curtly.

"A pep talk is a speech of exhortation which is meant to instil enthusiasm and boost morale," she declared triumphantly. "You're in a very bad situation. Which is exactly why I'm going to give you one now."

I gave her a deadpan expression. "...I'm extremely enthusiastic, my morale is in great shape; bye bye, please leave."

"I've certainly missed your sarcasm," she murmured dryly. "Now, you're in that three-second gap from your original location and your destination. That gives us a minute or two in your subconscious. So, when - "

With a sigh, I shut my eyes. _Can you pretend it's all a dream in a dream? _"I honestly, do not give a _fuck_ about how teleportation actually works."

"I know you don't," she agreed, tapping her head. "Which is why I'm going to cut to the advice."

"Since when have you given helpful advice? My box animal, for example, could use a few hints. And why don't you just answer some of my questions?"

Alex nodded and muttered to herself. "Fair point. I _have_ been helping you. Those memories of your future self, for one. No credit? Whatever. Your box animal cooperates so long as you're firm, and there's no point in answering your questions because Irie Shoichi knows them better than I do." She took a deep breath. "Savvy?"

None of it clicked. "I don't get it - are you the Alexandra Knight from my head, or my future self's head?"

She snapped her fingers, and we were somehow in a church. A CD was playing the Pirates of the Caribbean theme song so...? "I have a confession."

I waited. Impatiently.

In her hesitation, she glanced at her watch with a scowl. "Damn it! Already?! Look, I'll explain one day. But - "

"One day is not today," I finished sourly. "So what peril do I have to deal with now?"

Smiling wryly, she gave me an apologetic shrug. "Please, try to act like a peasant."

* * *

><p>BAM. <em>Damn it, why does gravity let me down so much?<em>

What had Alex described it as? 'A very bad situation'. And indeed it was.

I had literally: one _second _to summarize the turn of events. In the last moment, Byakuran had thrown a dagger of some sort (it was shaped like a dragon), so I had the equivalent of a knife lodged in my thigh. In my haste, I'd taken my completely unique - and useless - box animal. And perhaps worst of all, the coordinates I'd chosen were that of the Millefiore's main fighting force's camp. The very same people the Varia were fighting _against_.

So really, I'd just left one hell for another.

Instead of the bunch of well-paid fighters (more like a whole army) I'd been instinctively anticipating, I was in a neatly furnished room – with...a butler. A butler who was currently THROWING A FRICKING TEA TRAY. Rolling out of the way, I limped up, leaning on a wall. With every passing second, the painkiller I'd taken so long ago wore off a little more.

"Orgelt. Deal with the intruder."

"Of course, Master Siel."

And the final concern: 'Master Siel'. Unable to control myself, I laughed. _Well, aren't I lucky?! Seven billion people in the world, and I happen to come across both fucking princes! What are the odds?!_

Expecting hand-to-hand combat, there wasn't much I could do when Orgelt opened a rain class box weapon – a pelican. Doused in rain flames before I could move an inch, Orgelt lunged forward in my momentary daze, ramming my ribs. And boy, did it pack a punch.

_Stay conscious! Think caffeine. Red bull. Rockstar. V. _

Black.

A messenger had entered. "Excuse me. Boss, it seems the Vongola's assassination squad - "

Black.

"~Ushe she she she~…"

Black.

"What a weak peasant."

The sudden close-up was disturbingly familiar. "Holy fuck…! Bel…?!"

Rasiel grabbed the front of my shirt. "~Ushe she she she~...care to repeat that, peasant?"

Clearing my throat, I tried to look disgusted. Actually, it wasn't exactly difficult. "Ew, it's just an ugly replica. You know, Bel's _waaaay _better than you."

"Kaching!" he hissed, throwing me into the wall.

Pain. Ouch. I crumpled, laughing and coughing. At that point, I didn't give a fuck any more. "You're so weak. Bel's _waaaay _stronger than you," I wheezed. "And offensively, Bel's _waaaay_ better looking than you."

He walked towards me, anger apparent. "You talk big, but don't forget, you're a _girl_."

_Unbelievable. He thinks I don't know my own gender. _"Sexist as well? Bel's a _waaaay_ better prince than you."

Rasiel stooped down, and lightly trailed his fingers along my thigh_. PERVERT. GOD. IT MUST RUN IN THE FAMILY. _His fingers stopped and closed around Byakuran's weapon. "My my, that looks painful."

Like Bel, I couldn't see his eyes due to their possible fear of barbers – on the contrary, my dread had no façade. "If it took you that long to figure that out, Bel's _waaaay_ smarter than you."

Without another word, Rasiel ripped out Byakuran's weapon, and I choked down a scream into an awkward laugh. As he straightened up, he licked my blood off his fingers. _...Uh…some people have seriously weird fetishes. I won't judge. Well, not verbally at least. _ "~Ushe she she she~...you're quite a bit of fun, for Lord Byakuran's hostage."

"I-I'm not a hostage," I assured, putting pressure on my leg. _Ah, I'd need a bloody miracle to get out of this... _

"Hm? Is that so? Then what are you, peasant?" he spat. "Don't get cocky."

"You seem awfully cocky for someone who's going to die."

Rasiel put a foot at my throat, grinning. "Die? ~Ushe she she she~...! I am a chosen being of Lord Byakuran! Peasants like you are nothing more than scum under my feet!"

"Gross, you have athlete's foot?" I managed to say, sacrificing the little air my lungs held. As my vision grew hazy, Rasiel removed his foot and instead stamped on my ribs. I cursed in pain, curling up. "You...will die..."

"Oh – and who's going to kill me?" he laughed, having a seat in his chair. "Bel? Is it because he's 'way better than me'?"

Despite the situation, I had to let out a grin for that. "Glad the message got across, _peasant_."

Rasiel seemed to advance in slow motion. And it was about then when I realized something. Alex told me to act like a peasant – I couldn't. There was no way in hell I was going to bow down to shit like this. Few called that pride – most called it stupidity.

My box animal opened. It'd been dormant all this time, and it'd chosen _now _to open?! In an instant, it knocked Orgelt aside, and pounced on Rasiel, snapping its jaws in his face.

With the situation in my favor, I noticed finer details. It was twice the size of a normal wolf – clad in sun and storm flames. Was the size a result of the sun flames? It was hard to tell. Its fur was – as Mary put it – as white as snow, though, I don't think she was describing a lamb that would've voluntarily torn off her head.

I interrupted my box animal before it could turn Rasiel into Mary. "Oi. Get over here." And for the first time, it listened. Kya. I seriously felt an urge to squeal. Making sure I didn't leave its box behind, I climbed onto the wolf's back. Mode of transport: tick.

"Just so it's clear," I announced at the door as the two finally understood the situation, "Bel's _waaaay_ better than you."

* * *

><p><em>Several miles away...<em>

I collapsed gratefully onto the ground. Wolves were not designed to be ridden. All that crap in Twilight was a total lie. Leaning back on a tree, my box animal sat obediently in front of me, healing my wounds by licking. The wound on my thigh was too deep though - my ribs didn't seem to be a bit to battered for sun flames.

"Alright, you need a name."

It grunted in response.

_Wolves are canines. It'd be too much of a shame if I didn't name it Xanxus. _

It slapped me. Literal bitch slap. Actually, maybe it was a guy? …_Not checking._ Could it read my thoughts or something?

"Please, don't tell me you want to be called 'Nibbles' too." *Growl*. "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious?" *Yawn*. "Lucky?" *Scowl*. I made up my mind, pissed. I'd taken enough crap for today. From Terry to Merone Base, to Rasiel and Orgelt.

"Ace. I'm not taking no for an answer, so shut up, grin, and bear it." ...It actually rolled its eyes at me. "Go find me a ring. You probably need to eat flames or something soon."

Sighing, I buried my face in my hands. Sleep. I just needed to hold out a little longer. Find the Varia. Make sure Rasiel died.

"Aargh! Gerrof me! Aargh! Help!"

The screams drew nearer, and Ace came back dragging a Millefiore soldier like a chew toy. _Oh, good job. _Dumping the guy in front of me, it lay down and yawned, watching lazily.

"P-Please...don't kill me..." the guy muttered pleadingly, getting on his knees.

It took a few seconds for me to assess the situation. "Give me your shoes."

"W-What?"

"I know right?" I muttered. It wasn't exactly proper, but I could sure relate to the guy's confusion. "Gimme your shoes, jacket and any rings." Hastily, he handed over what I'd requested along with a rain ring. "Now scat." He scampered off, and within seconds, he was out of sight.

The shoes weren't my size, but it was slightly better than being barefoot. At least the jacket was warm. Now that I actually had a ring, I let Ace eat some flames, and the storm and sun flames were replaced by rain flames.

A group of Millefiore people (twenty, thirty maybe?) charged, yelling a battle cry that I couldn't even make out. In my state, I could barely stand; much less fight a mini army.

"Please tell me you've got an ace up your sleeve…"

Ace howled.

_...The hell? Sharp claws, sharp teeth, speed, agility...and it howls?! A short, lazy howl too. _It wasn't even remotely scary. But soon after I heard it, my eyes began to droop, and it took every scrap of willpower to prolong my consciousness. The Millefiore guys dropped like flies hit by bug spray.

_Flames in sound waves? Holy shit. That's actually...awesome._

"Go to…Vongola Mansion. Take down…Millefiore…on the way," I murmured, finding a comfortable position. "Let Xanxus have Rasiel…you deal with…batshit crazy...bats. Get me…later."

As I descended into involuntary sleep, I relaxed, and allowed the darkness swallow me.

* * *

><p><em>A little later...<em>

Squalo was concerned.

Xanxus had defeated the Funeral Wreath (who apparently was Bel's batshit crazy twin brother).They'd defeated the majority of the Millefiore in the area; the allied families were dealing with the remnants. But when he'd notified Terry of his progress, she'd given him bad news in return.

Serena was lost. Not in the 'she's dead' sense, or 'I can't find my way' sense – it was more like...they'd lost her. Though if she wasn't in Merone Base, where the hell was she? In Italy? Pfft, as if.

Remembering something odd he'd seen, he turned to the other Varia members among the rubble of the Vongola mansion. "Voi. Did any of you shitheads see a wolf?"

"Huh? What are you talking about?" Bel mocked. "Dumbass is in Japan."

"Captain Squalo, maybe you need an eye checkup," Fran agreed, nodding slightly.

"VOI! I KNOW WHAT I FUCKING SAW!"

"Bel and Fran were just giving good advice," Lussuria shrugged. "Stress can cause bad eyesight along with hair loss."

Xanxus yawned. "I saw it."

Was Xanxus actually participating in the right conversation? Disturbed, Squalo folded him arms, silent in deep thought. Maybe it'd been his imagination?

"A really, really fat penguin."The members of the Varia snapped their attention to familar voice. Serena was leaning a huge white wolf, exhaustion written all over her face.

Squalo voiced the thoughts of the group. "What?!"

She hobbled forward, and returned the wolf to its box. "Well, now that the ice is broken, sup?"

…*facepalm*.

* * *

><p><em>The following day...<em>

As I woke, I frowned.

Fran was in the room, reading through a few books. _Oi oi, privacy! _He noticed me wake without turning. "Oh. I thought you were dead.".

"Gee, how nice," I drawled sarcastically, propping myself up from the bed. There was no mistaking where I was. After all, I spent the first seven or so years of my life here. "Why the fuck...am I in my room?"

"It's _your_ room," Fran pointed out.

"No no, I mean, why am I in my old house?"

He shrugged. "But it's _your_ house."

"But why are we _here_?"

"We were too far from headquarters. We're staying here for a while."

Pulling the sheets over my head, I groaned. Afternoon sunlight was streaming through the thin blinds. As irksome as the light was, it provided the freezing room with a little warmth. "I feel like crap. What happened? And how long have I been out?"

"You don't remember?"

"No, I remembered, I'm just asking because I want to waste time and make you state what should be blatantly obvious to me," I muttered curtly. "Where's Bel? I owe him something."

"Bel went to get food," he said with his monotonous tone. My stomach rumbled at his words. "You've been unconscious for almost a day. Last night, you mistook Boss' box animal for a pillow when you were explaining how you got to Italy," Fran murmured, "so the explanation wasn't exactly clear."

"Huh. At least that bit's mutual." We sat in awkward silence for a bit. Actually, I sat in awkward silence, Fran kept on reading whatever he was. "How's Mukuro? I haven't heard from him in days."

"Shishō's resting. Any ideas to get him out?"

"What are you reading?"

"Your diary."

No shame? At all? Urgh. "...From when?"

"I think you're five at about here," he nodded, showing me the nostalgic messy writing. "It's rather interesting. I never knew your childhood was so dull."

"..."

* * *

><p>"VOI! You put a camera in her contact lens?" Squalo uttered at the video footage of Terry. There was a slight lag.<p>

_"So? It's only a discomfort to like…one percent of the body. And no one's gonna rip out her eye or anything, right_?" she pointed out. _"Anyways, putting the audio from Serena's earpiece and the image data from the camera gives you a sensory understanding of an issue."_

"Then you know what happened to her. Why she's in Italy."

Terry shrugged, and put opened a video file on Squalo's screen. _"Oh yeah? What did she say?"_

"Teleporting or some shit like that."

_"All right, I'll fast forward this bit. She went to Merone Base...encountered a bunch of people...and here."_ The video began to play at normal speed. Serena ran from a large group of Millefiore fighters, and dashed into a room with a few scientists. Then...static.

"And that's where you lose her," he muttered. "Signal jam?"

_"Nah, I lost her audio, but after a while, the video still worked," _Terry answered, typing rapidly. _"It was probably the same teleportation device the Millefiore used to get rid of Merone Base. Because the next thing I see is this."_

A slightly grainy Byakuran smiled, and poured tea.

"Oh you have got to be shitting me."

_"It's hard to lip read what Byakuran says since context's always been hard to establish with him," _Terry muttered. _"He's a hard guy to read."_

"Just tell me how she got out," Squalo sighed.

Terry skipped through a small portion of the video. _"She used the same device. A miracle it actually worked. So I don't think she was lying when she told you she teleported. Sh__e went to the Millefiore's temp camp. Accidentally, I think. See – here's that Fake Funeral Wreath." _Rasiel appeared, looming over the camera's angle.

"Fucking hell," Squalo muttered, looking away. It hurt his pride to watch. "Do you know if - "

When I opened the door to Squalo's room, the conversation ended abruptly. Yup, definitely a sign that they weren't talking about me. Cough. On a different matter; one look at my ridiculous attire was enough for both Squalo and Terry to crack up simultaneously. "Lussuria?" Terry choked, taking a screenshot.

"Oh shut up." I wasn't fucked to change out of Lussuria's wolf costume. Look on the bright side – it was warm. Leaning on my walking stick, I sighed a breath of relief. I'd lost no important box weapons or rings in the attack.

"How do you feel?"Squalo asked, returning to his straight face.

"Like a jackass."

"Glad to see you're alive," Terry noted. "How does it feel to travel halfway around the world?"

"Fucking awesome."

"Are you being sarcastic?"

I shrugged. It wasn't like my opinion mattered these days. "Actually, could I talk to Shoichi?"

"Sure." Changing the direction of the camera, Shiochi came into view. He must've been in deep, _deep _concentration, because Terry found the need to punch him painfully.

"Terry, that hurts!" Shoichi complained loudly, readjusting his glasses. When he noticed me, a grin sprang up on his face. "Serena! Yo, how are you?"

"I need to talk to you. In private," I added, giving Squalo an apologetic look. He rolled his eyes and left, muttering under his breath. Shoichi gave Terry the same look on the other end, and she left, muttering equally dark words.

"Alright. I'll just summarize what happened after you left Merone Base. I told Tsunayoshi the truth, Ryohei and Hibari switched with their younger selves, Merone Base was teleported away, Byakuran announced a choice match in ten days with the Real Funeral Wreaths, and I distributed the Vongola boxes."

It was a lot to take in, but I just needed to make a vague confirmation. "Uh huh. So when does Tsuna and his group go back to the past?"

He gave me a blank look. "When they defeat Byakuran...?"

What? "It's impossible for them to go back unless they defeat Byakuran?"

"It's not impossible, but it's not really necessary, is it?"

Plot hole. Wasn't there this whole Arcobaleno Trial thing? And what about the bit where they met dead Vongola people? Urgh. All right, screw that. That bit never made too much sense anyway. "In that case, I'll get right into it. Why exactly does Byakuran hate me?"

Shoichi swallowed. _Argh, she's not subtle at all... _"W-Well...to be honest...I'm not too sure myself..."

"You're lying, Shoichi," Serena sighed. "Just tell me something. A lie. A joke. Whatever."

_She deserves to know, right?_ "Terry probably told you about the time you visited us in America, right?"

*Nods*. "Uh huh. And I met Byakuran."

"Well...you didn't like him at first, but after a while, you guys started to get along...really well," Shoichi stammered nervously. She was curious – he could tell that much. _Now, how is Serena going to take it?_

"How well?"

He readjusted his glasses, frowning. "You two went to watch a movie together."

"OH MY GOD – SHOICHI, THAT'S...THAT'S..."

"It's a shocker, I know."

" – not actually terrifying. You're not pulling my leg, are you?" she warned, raising an eyebrow. "Coz if you are, I swear - "

"It's the truth!" he yelped, panicking. _That's weird. Her future self would have a heart attack._

Serena rolled her eyes. "I'm kidding dude. I believe you. Continue."

"Ah...right." He cleared his throat. "Terry and I were together a lot of the time, so you spent some time with Byakuran-san. Both of you seemed to be having a good time, but..." Shoichi hesitated, thinking over his words.

"I'm not getting any younger."

"He told you he wanted to create an organization, and well...take over the world. He wanted you to join him."

She laughed. Hysterically. _Does she think I'm joking? _"You mean to tell me," she paused to take a breath, "that he walked up to me, and literally said 'I want to dabble in world domination'?"

Shoichi sighed and nodded. "Yeah. Actually, those were his exact words."

Serena choked to a halt mid-laugh. "What did I say?"

"Actually, you didn't say anything," he murmured. "You left America without a word. You were on the next flight to Italy."

"How'd Byakuran take it?" she muttered with a groan.

Shaking his head dismissively, Shoichi found the words tumbling out against his will. "That look on his face...I've never seen anything like it. I can't forget it."

"What? Anger?"

"No...betrayal."

Serena stared off in thought, and after what seemed like an eternity, she nodded. "Fine. Let's move on then."

_How can she be so calm after hearing stuff like that? _Shoichi could only wonder.

"Shoichi."

_Well, that's what makes Serena...Serena. _

"Sherry. Lichi. Shot. Shuck."

He realized she was talking to him. "W-What?"

"They're bad ship names, yeah?" she winked. Though with the eyepatch, she might've just been blinking. Getting up from her seat, she started prancing around like a madman. "SHOICHI AND TERRY, SITTING IN A TREE. K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"

"S-Serena!"

She sat down with a triumphant grin. "Well, now you're paying attention. So, why did you tell me not to come to the future? Like _you_, not your past self?"

Shoichi took a moment to reset his mind for the situation. "Ah...that's something minor. It's uh…not important."

"Your lies are hurt me more than the truth ever will," she sighed. "You were on the verge of tears when you told me. Now, the Shoichi I know can panic; but doesn't cry like a little sissy girl."

Busted. _I can't lie to her. Not this. _"Serena...you know your future self..."

"Died? Yeah, that's history." She paused. "Actually, that'd be the future. What of it?"

"It's highly technical," Shoichi tried to explain, "but if you switch selves with a deceased future version of you...you'll die." _Maybe she'll think I'm joking again? Maybe I should tell her I'm joking..._

"Explain further."

"I-It's just a speculation...but...the ten year bazooka switches the essence of life between two time periods," he started. "The Chinese call it 'qi', religion calls it 'chakra' - you can't see it, you can't detect it, but you have it when you're alive – you don't when you're dead. That's the basis of my machine."

"It's not particle based? If your device holds life essence, how am I here? Shouldn't I have just gone back to the past?"

"No...cells in the body die and are replaced too often. A particle system leaves too much room for error." Serena nodded for him to continue. "Anyway...if you make the switch with an essence of life that isn't there, normally, you wouldn't be able to come to the future. But because of my machine...well...basically, it sets a limit on your life. So...you have slightly under ten years to live."

"I have ten years to live?!" Serena spluttered. "Ten?!"

"I-I'm sorry, Serena..." he choked. "If I had reprogrammed the machine – or if - "

"Huh. Fuck yeah. That's awesome!"

_...Why is she celebrating...? _

She seemed to sense his confusion. "Shoichi, I could die tomorrow from my injuries. I could die next week from a car accident. I never expected to live another ten years anyway."

"But...Serena...it's my - "

"It's my fault," she cut in. "It's my life, it's my responsibility, got it?"

He nodded slowly. _This is...Serena._

"Moving forward – how did I die?"

_Man, she could at least try to be subtle! _"W-Well...uh...you see...well..."

"Shoichi. Breathe. Think. Speak."

He took a deep breath. "You told me a bit about your premonition - thus it was known that the Millefiore would eventually attack the Vongola. The future you, me, Tsunayoshi and Hibari-san came up with a plan; I would be the one to 'kill' Tsunayoshi. We'd get him to a safe location, and pass of that he was dead."

"Yeah, but without his body, isn't that suspicious?" she murmured quietly.

"If I was the one to lie to Byakuran-san...well..."

"Fair point. It didn't go to plan, did it?"

"The plan was a disaster," he admitted dejectedly. "I was promoted and transferred to Merone Base at the last minute. Tsunayoshi had already put his guardians out of the country. You'd heard a rumor of my transfer, so you put yourself on the scene."

"And then shit happened."

"It was a massacre!" He clenched his teeth, and broke eye contact. "If I had known..."

"You didn't. Come on, finish it."

"The Millefiore had the advantage of box weapons. You were shot – it wasn't even major. But you were held up, and weren't able to treat your injuries. The goal of the mission was to kill the both you and Tsunayoshi– there would be no end without a corpse. So you shot Tsunayoshi - "

Serena looked down. "I knew it. I killed Tsuna."

" - with a special bullet."

"What? How'd I get access to something like that?"

Shoichi shrugged. He had no idea. "Tsunayoshi only appeared dead. You ensured Tsunayoshi's body would be placed in Namimori Forest, not cremated. It was a theory that you'd mentioned, but I didn't think it'd actually be possible to pull off. But either way…you…you…"

"Did I die alone?" she murmured quietly.

He shrugged. "I'm sorry. I don't know the details."

Shoichi could sense Serena's increasing disappointment and frustration. "Well, on the matter of relationships - "

It was that moment when Terry barged into the room, clinging onto him. "Sorry Serena, I'm gonna steal him for breakfast. Bye~."

And it would've been totally smooth had Squalo not come flying into Serena's end of the camera, with an equally mischievous grin. "VOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOIIIII! Bel bought sushi!"

The connection cut off. _Oh well. I'm sure Serena will figure it out eventually._

* * *

><p><em>Later that night...<em>

Low expectations.

That's something that should be taught in every school. Why have high expectations? Honestly. With low expectations, at least you won't be as disappointed when you fail. And if by some chance you don't fail; then wouldn't you be happier?

Dejectedly, I watched Ace explore my overgrown garden. The memories of my childhood seemed more distant with each cautious step he took. Despite the clear night sky, an ominous cloud hung over my head. Lies, lies, lies. I was a liar. Life was a liar. Fate was a liar. The jigsaw of reality had corrupted my life beyond hope.

At the time, Shoichi's words hadn't seemed like much. It was only now, hours later that I felt the sting of reality and fate. Even with my low expectations, I couldn't help but be disappointed. I had finally found the right path - but I hadn't been prepared for the obstacles I could see only now. Thus...the reason for another sleepless night.

I'd heard Squalo stand at the door for quite some time now (I had no idea why). Without meaning to, I spoke my question out loud. "Are you afraid of dying?"

"Depends." Knowing I'd noticed his presence, he left his post and sat beside me.

"On what?"

Squalo shrugged. "What I'd lose."

"Your life? Duh?"

"Voi, there are things worth more than life, Serena."

"Really? Like what?"

"Tch, I can't just give you all the answers. Live a little and find out yourself."

I have him a skeptical glance. In retaliation, he rolled his eyes, and gazed up at the sky. If it wasn't so bloody cold, it'd be a beautiful night. Ace bounded up to Squalo and wagged its tail.

"I see you've gotten the hang of your box animal."

"You could say that." Ace was more obedient than I originally thought. So long as I was decisive, that is. Unfortunately, it's dignity and pride prevented it from becoming my slave – something like 'get me a pizza' would not end well. Believe me, I'd already tried.

"Remind me, how did you end up in Italy?"

...I was afraid to tell him the _whole_ truth. What if he didn't believe me? What if he became paranoid about my bad luck? "I accidentally wandered into Merone Base's research facility; they were doing some flame teleportation experiment. Next thing I know, I'm in middle of a forest, and I see Xanxus blow something up in the sky."

Squalo stared at me incredulously, and I swore – he knew I wasn't completely honest. But then again - leaving out information wasn't lying. He didn't push question my explanation. "Serena, are you really all right?"

Folding my arms, I shrugged and looked at my feet. "I'm fine Squalo. Really. I'm just not tired."

Ace went back to its box, and the garden was shrouded in darkness once more. Squalo dusted himself off as he got up, and extended a hand. "Well if you've got something on your mind, let it out, 'kay? Don't be a lone wolf."

Nodding, I let him help me to my feet with a small grin. "Well, it beats being a bloody dog."

* * *

><p>It became apparent the following day when we returned to the Varia HQ that Bel was deliberately avoiding me. With my entire history with Bel, never, <em>never<em>, had he walked away when I'd fallen down the stairs _without laughing_.

Bel's well-being had never really bothered me. He was insane. On a normal basis, I wouldn't want anything to do with the guy. Though meeting his brother...made me realize how much an ass Bel wasn't. So when the opportunity finally came, I confronted him. Actually, he'd just come out of the shower. At least he had a towel.

"Dumbass. What the _fuck_ are you doing here?" he hissed, knives appearing (as per usual) from nowhere. Considering he didn't have any clothes on...well...where the hell did he hide them?

"Bel, I want you to be completely honest," I muttered, standing at the door to his room. The timing was bad (fine, more like fucking catastrophic), but it was now or never. With a sigh, I mustered my courage. "Have you been rejected by a girl?"

"...What?"

I was pretty sure I'd figured it out. Bel was in a foul mood, because he'd probably lost a girlfriend or something. It wasn't like that sort of thing was uncommon, anyway. "Were you dumped?"

The corner of his mouth twitched.

"Oh, by the way, I did that equation you gave me," I nodded, walking into his room and shutting the door behind me. "I...I don't understand Bel. I-I wanted to ask you about it."

"What's there to get?"

"Well...what does 'I am less than three of you' supposed to mean? Is it a 'I'm a prince, you're a peasant' thing?"

"..." He carved the less than symbol and 3 onto the nearest wall. "What does this look like to you?"

I made my way beside him, and studied it. Trying didn't help me understand more than I saw. "Less than three?"

He pushed my head to the side, so I was staring at the wall at a different angle. "What do you see now?"

_Oh-my-fuck-let-go! _Why did Bel care so much about a bloody equation? Was it a reference? ...I suddenly regretted avoiding social media with my dying will. I'd check it out after our discussion then. But for now...guessing was the only thing I had. "An Asian emoticon. Like, a really, really happy face. So... I should be happy to see three of you?"

Bel sat on the edge of his bed, muttering to himself in the process. "Why the hell are you so _stupid_?!"

"Oh well, I'm _sorry_," I shot back just as annoyed, "for giving a shit about why you're acting like a drunk chicken. If there's something you want to say, why don't you just say it?! If you can't even talk to one of your peasants, how can you call yourself a bloody prince?!"

"You're not a peasant," he muttered, not offended in the slightest. How offending.

"You've treated me like a source of your entertainment since the day we met," I continued angrily, "so don't you dare act like you don't look down on me!" Hang on. Was I telling him to actually act like an asshole to me? ...Fuck. Taking a seat beside him, I took a deep breath. _Inner peace. Find the zen_. Ah, there was something I'd forgotten.

I punched Bel as hard as I could.

The strike had been anger fuelled, so instinct didn't save me when Bel pinned me face first to the floor, pressing his knee into my back. "What the hell?!"

"What type of a phony prince can't even kill his twin brother properly? Admit it, you deserved that one!" I grunted, gagging. His carpet was in desperate need of a vacuum cleaner. I wasn't looking forward to having a spinal injury, so I tried to kick him off – Bel sat on me instead. _In some ways, he's God damn worse than Rasiel._

"There was a girl."

_Was_. Past tense. Was the break up mutual or one-sided? ...Were Lussuria's fantasies infecting me? Quickly, I corrected myself - it wasn't the girly hormones kicking in; I legitimately wanted dirt on Bel. "She left a creepily sadistic princely guy like you? Pfft, no way."

"She died."

Before Bel could reveal anything, the door burst open, and Squalo barged in. Huh. Inconvenient. "Voi, Bel, have you seen - " He stopped. Um. Maybe having Bel sit on me while he was wearing nothing but a towel...didn't give off the best image.

We split apart immediately. "WELL, I've enjoyed our talk," I nodded enthusiastically, ignoring Squalo's twitching expression. Look on the bright side - it was awkward for all of us, but I didn't want to consider how much worse it'd be if Squalo attacked Bel. Prince or not, that towel needed a sign - _fragile, handle with care_.

Bel's sullen face answered my forced smile.

"Look on the bright side; you're still stuck with me," I noted to myself, hobbling after Squalo. "The world's a big place. You'll find your...princess. Or maybe she'll find you."

As we made our way down the corridor, Squalo cleared his throat. "Should I ask?"

"Oh God no."

"You sure?"

"Do you need me for something?" I asked, eager to change the subject.

"I need to get to Japan asap. Can you pilot?"

_Now?! Of all times? There's a fucking storm on the coast of Asia! _The answer was very simple. I couldn't. Technology had advanced too much in the last ten years – I didn't have enough experience either. But from day one, I'd done nothing but cause trouble – I felt compelled to do something in return.

"I can do it." _What's the worst thing that could happen? Honestly, it'll be fine._

And of course, the worst thing that could've happened...happened.

We crashed.

* * *

><p><strong>And...that is the end of the chapter. Can't actually make any promises on when I'll next update. Exams are like rabbits. <strong>**My laptop crashed, Microsoft Word crashed, the Internet crashed continuously, technology hates me. I wrote half of this on my phone so...typos, errors, etc. are all over the place.**

**Thanks for the reviews, favorites and alerts, btw. It's awesome, I must say.**

**I apologize for kinda skipping through the whole Merone Base invasion. It was never one of my favorite arcs - it was so...long. **

**Hibari...it's a consideration. Apparently it was heavily suggested in a few of the chapters (unintentionally), so I decided just to go with the flow. Yeah...it's kinda random.**

**Anisthasia made a great point - Alexandra Knight didn't show up for a while. There were a lot of technical difficulties I had to mull over, so...she appears in the chapter at least. If there have been any unanswered questions, please ask, I'll try to answer them as well as I can...eventually. *thumbs up*.**

**Oh and Deinokos, three thirds was an inside joke, but it's confusing, so thanks for noticing that :D**

**Have a nice day, ciao~ :]**


	32. Choices

**Aha...ha...*looks at long list of excuses*. Yup. Sorry.**

**Enjoy?**

* * *

><p><span>Chapter 32 - Choices<span>

The new recruit of the Millefiore family was anxious. He had every right, considering his hell of a temperamental boss. And unfortunately for the aforementioned new recruit, Byakuran was _not _in a good mood.

He knocked twice, and entered. "Lord Byakuran, I have a report."

Byakuran casually squished another marshmallow. "Go on."

He swallowed. "The missile strike was successful. Serena di Squalo and Superbi Squalo are confirmed dead." The messenger placed a manila folder in Byakuran's outstretched hand.

Byakuran chewed his marshmallow thoughtfully. "And you've seen Serena-chan's body then?"

Immediately, the messenger paled. You see, the moral 'don't shoot the messenger' didn't apply to Byakuran. Or logic, apparently. "Lord Byakuran...they were hit by a _missile_. Even then, they were hundreds of miles from the Japanese coast – there was even a typhoon," he exasperated. "You'd be more likely to win the lotto than find them."

With a growl, Byakuran snapped the folder shut. "Unfortunately, we're dealing with someone who doesn't know when to _die_."

The messenger bowed hastily. "Of course, Lord Byakuran. What are your orders?"

Silence.

And so, the messenger waited. For half an hour. Just about when he had begun to wonder if his boss had a stroke, Byakuran spoke. "Send the Millefiore's assassination squad to Namimori. When Serena-chan eventually arrives, bring her corpse to me."

* * *

><p><em>In Japan…<em>

Gathered in Lal Mirch's hospital room, she, Reborn, Dino, Kusakube, Terry and Bianchi frowned simultaneously at the news.

"Since when did the Millefiore family have an assassination squad?" Reborn asked first.

"They've existed since the family's beginning," Terry murmured, "not that they're very strong. Then again, with their numbers, the Millefiore doesn't exactly need them. I'd say...no more than three can face the Varia; that's barely a _squad_."

"That's just one rumor," Kusakube corrected dully, "the other says they make the Varia look like wimps."

Lal cleared her throat loudly. "The question we need to be asking is why they've been deployed to Namimori. They're not even interested in us - if we're not their goal, then what is?"

"That was two questions," Terry muttered under her breath. With a roll of her eyes, Lal dismissed the comment. "I don't think Byakuran intends to kill us off before the Choice match. Maybe his assassination squad is just observing."

"Only a fool would send an assassination squad to observe," Lal scoffed. "Don't forget - there's one factor that's still missing from the picture."

Dino perked up instantly. "Serena."

"Hang on," Bianchi cut in, "weren't Serena and Squalo supposed to arrive in Japan last night?"

Terry shrugged. "Well, to be frank, I just made contact with the Varia. On the last leg of their flight, all communications went down. And there was a typhoon. We have to consider all scenarios."

"No way..." Dino murmured, barely audible. "You've got to be joking..."

"Whatever the case," Reborn started, "this stays quiet. Tsuna and the others don't have time to be distracted."

* * *

><p><em>Somewhere at the Pacific Rim...<em>

Crash.

It's amusing how people always assume 'crash' is a bad thing. 'Crash' is even a synonym for awesome. _Urgh. Shut up brain. _

Take it one step further – crashing parties, crashing at a friend's place. Positive things, are they not? So what's so bad about crashing typhoons and oceans? _...How does this shit even originate?!_

"Well...besides losing navigation systems mid-flight, getting hit by a missile, losing to mother nature, escaping a flaming wreckage and surfing without a board – not much," I muttered under my breath, solely for the sake of keeping up my concentration. Even if I yelled, I still wouldn't have been able to hear myself. Back to the point – even after all that bad luck, both Squalo and I were washed aboard a fishing vessel.

As the wind and waves whipped my coat, I hung onto Squalo for support. He trudged towards the cabin and slammed open the door, glaring at the terrified sailors inside. The miniscule distance between us separated two very different worlds. "Voi, this ship is headed for Japan, right?"

"W-We're in the middle of the ocean…" someone choked, cowering. Thank God. He was speaking Japanese.

With a little difficulty, I walked inside, immediately feeling the unnatural sway. This...this was my first time being on a boat in the ocean – seasickness? I"Can you take us to Japan?"

"We're in the middle of the ocean," another repeated dumbly.

"...Yes. We are." _I hope these people aren't directionally challenged._

"T-The ocean..."

Oh man. This was gonna take a while.

* * *

><p>Over the course of the trip, Squalo worked with the crew, and I did…nothing. I wanted to help, but I'd probably be a burden and curse the fish (it certainly wouldn't be the first time), and I was still nursing quite a few injuries. So that gave me some golden time to think.<p>

Things had been hectic on my end, but everything had more or less happened in accordance to Alexandra's 'plot'. Yamamoto lost to Genkishi, Shoichi was actually a good guy, Xanxus killed Rasiel and Squalo was on some fishing boat – so really, how necessary was I? I didn't even have to do anything, right?

Ah, but I had to cover for Basil. He never came to the future, apparently. Then again, it wasn't like he did much either, right?

So…in that case, the Choice battle was coming up. Tsuna's team would lose, but some girl called Yuni would show up and save their asses. Except… _How the hell is Yuni supposed to GET there?_ Plot hole, anyone? Byakuran wouldn't let her get anywhere near the Choice battle – and it wasn't like she could've teleported with the Millefiore's _only _teleportation system that Tsuna had used to get to...where ever the battle was.

Actually, there was another issue: Yuni. Did she have super powers to summon Primo? According to Alex's plotline – she did. Hang on, wasn't Byakuran supposed to have super powers? _…Who cares._

_If the whole Arcobaleno Trial crap didn't happen, then the whole 'let's meet your dead ancestors' thing won't either, right? Ha ha…huh…? _Wait. If Tsuna and his group didn't go back to the past to meet the first generation guardians…wouldn't they be missing some special moves? _And they wouldn't get any time to rest up after running away from the Choice battle… _

Urgh. I head banged a wall. All the others had to do was train, train, train. Boy did I want to change shoes. Literally. Mine were currently pretty soaked. But metaphorically, I wished I wasn't 'me'. And what was Tsuna and his group supposed to be dealing with now? A boycott or something? _Meh. They'll survive._

Needless to say, for the many hours I was aboard the ship, I could be found in deep thought, staggering back and forth the deck of the ship with a bucket.

* * *

><p><em>Meanwhile, in Japan…<em>

Tsuna sighed as he stared miserably at his cup noodles. He could sense the discontent among the group. Two days of instant food was enough to make anybody miserable.

"This meal fails to deliver nutrition to the extreme!" Ryohei yelled frustratedly.

Yamamoto smiled weakly. "Still, this is when you first realize…we can't even train well by ourselves." Gokudera nodded silently in agreement.

With a sigh, Tsuna put his chopsticks on the table. If he didn't voice the group's doubt, it'd be a while till another opportunity came up. The Choice battle was coming up; and as sad as it was, they couldn't even look after themselves. They needed the support of the girls. "Maybe…we should tell them."

"We can't! What if something happens to Kyoko?!" Ryohei rebutted, flicking noodles all over the place.

"But when you think about it, even the kids know," Yamamoto pointed out. "I feel bad that they're the only ones who don't."

"T-That's true… But I can't put Kyoko-chan and Haru in danger," Tsuna decided firmly. What he really needed – was a counsellor. However, Reborn wasn't offering any assistance, and his guardians all had their own opinions. _I guess that leaves...Serena. _Getting up, he broke into a run, glad to finally have made a feasible goal.

"Juudaime, where are you going?" Gokudera called after him.

"I have something I need to do!" Without thinking, he made his way to Serena's room. Obviously she wasn't there – she was halfway round the world.

But there was something...warm about the room. Clothes were strewn around the room, scribbles covered a large whiteboard on one wall, and various bits and pieces littered the room.

Studying the whiteboard, he frowned. He couldn't read the majority of it - but there were only a few lines in Japanese – it'd been crossed out. But it was addressed to _him_.

**Baka-Tsuna, **

**There's a difference between knowing nothing at all, and knowing there's something you're not being told. Ignorance didn't kill the cat, curiosity did. A boss respects their comrades; so put yourself in their shoes.**

_Put myself...in their shoes?_

Bianchi suddenly slid open the door, breaking the peace of the room and his concentration. "Tsuna, there's a problem! Kyoko ran out of the base!"

For the first time in days, Tsuna knew exactly what to do.

* * *

><p><em>Meanwhile...<em>

As soon as I stepped back onto Japanese soil, there was something fishy in the air. And no, it wasn't the tuna that Squalo and I each had gotten from our brief voyage. We left the docks, and headed for the nearest entrance to the Vongola hideout – the warehouses. We walked by the house I was living in (back in the past and all) but I resisted the temptation to visit.

Eerie silence.

"Duck!" Squalo yelled, dropping to the ground himself.

I tripped on a shoelace, and my tuna pinned me down. The fish was heavy – forty pounds. A split second later, an arrow laced in storm flames thudded into the side of the fish – right above my heart.

_THANK YOU, DECEASED FAT FISHY FRIEND._

Squalo recovered from the ambush first, and we ran into my house. _Oh yay, I got to visit after all. _Instead of arrows this time, knives flew after us. One or two may've grazed me. We crouched behind a wall, and I studied the arrow in the tuna and put together the facts – the Millefiore's insignia, poison, and the skill required to fire such a shot.

"I haven't even been back for an hour, and Byakuran wants to kill me," I sighed miserably. "See? I knew I should've stayed in Italy. Screw Japan. I swear, this country hates me."

"There's three of them at most," Squalo whispered, ignoring my complaints. "An archer, a swordsman and some knife bastard."

"Sounds like me, you and Bel."

"You don't really use bow and arrows that much."

"Meh, still, have some originality damn it!" Shaking my head, I tried to focus, but the colors seemed too bright. Even on land, the world seemed to sway from side to side. "Son of a potato," I sighed, flexing my fist. "In that case, I'll take the knife bastard, you take the swordsman."

"There's still the archer."

Rummaging through my pockets, I found the right storage box. Opening the box with cloud flames, I stood up and flattened myself against the wall. The bow and arrow felt familiar, and when the moment felt right, I sidestepped, and fired. _  
><em>

The arrow travelled across the room, smashed through the window, and began to multiply. I counted two distinct screams. "That makes things easier. You ready, Squalo?"

"You seem awfully enthusiastic," Squalo commented, opening his box weapon.

Ace came out of his box on his own, growling and ready for a fight. "Well you have _no idea_ how much I want a shower."

* * *

><p>As I trudged down towards the Vongola's communications room, I felt guilty about making the floor soaking wet. But the thoughts disappeared as I reached my destination; Byakuran's face was on the largest screen in the room. A small group had formed - but preferring to observe, I kept silent.<p>

_This must be the video call about Choice..._ "Ohayo Byakuran," I muttered quietly, giving a mock salute. His expression turned nasty, but he ignored my intrusion nonetheless. I suppose he wasn't happy his assassination squad was basically non-existent now.

"_You'll at least need to bring all your friends who came from the past,"_ Byakuran continued sourly. _"You'll be disqualified if anyone's missing."_

"What?! Even the girls?"

"_It's more meaningful."_ The monitor switched off, and the room was left in silence.

Ryohei appeared to have a seizure. Or maybe he was trying to pull off the harlem shake. "K-K-Kyoko..."

"Face the facts," Dino shrugged, trying to calm Ryohei down. "With this situation, we can't exactly have Kyoko and Haru go into a battle they have no idea about."

"Dino's right. That's important, but we need to figure out how Byakuran accessed our network first," Reborn cut in sharply.

"I dunno, have you ever considered the front door?" I questioned from the doorway. Dino, Giannini and Reborn looked too shocked for their own good. Tsuna, Gokudera, Yamamoto and Ryohei grinned, and we went over our greetings.

"Serena, you're soaked," Dino managed, his voice cracking.

I swayed uneasily on my feet, and aimed my fall for the nearest chair. "I had a shower."

"In your clothes?"

"They needed a shower too."

Reborn cleared his throat for attention. I couldn't help but ask if he had a cold. As usual – he ignored me. "Back to the matters at hand; how did Byakuran - "

"VOI! Your security's a joke." Oh look. Squalo caught up. He'd actually bothered drying off too. "Damn amateurs."

"Ah!"

"You're...!"

"Squalo!"

Unbelievable. It took three people to voice the realization that Squalo had just entered the room. Squalo handed Dino one of the tuna. "A gift." _I can't believe that fish survived that fight without a single scratch..._

Dino smiled weakly. "Thanks. You're late Squalo. Your student's tired of waiting."

Yamamoto beamed excitedly, pointing at himself. "You mean...the tutor for my training is..."

And...Squalo beat the crap out of him. Tsuna's group protested loudly as Yamamoto's unconscious body was heaved over Squalo's shoulder like a sack of turnips. "I'd rather kill him myself."

"But – "

Dino stopped Tsuna with a shake of his head. Dino was approving ruthless violence? Wow, this day was seriously full of surprises. Though surprisingly, it wasn't a surprise when Ryohei punched Tsuna in the face. Well, not for me, anyways.

Things started going in slow motion, and classical music played in the back of my head. Gokudera lurched at Ryohei, eyes bulging, face contorting in anger. Swooping in from the side, Dino tried frantically to pull him back. Tsuna and Ryohei stared dramatically eye to eye.

"Pineapple," I declared.

They all stared.

"At this rate, you're all going to die miserably against Byakuran, so pineapple. You people need to get your sandwich together. Bread, meat, lettuce, sauce," I grumbled put my feet on another chair, ticking the thoughts off my fingers.

"What the fuck is 'pineapple' supposed to mean?!" Gokudera yelled stopping his attempt to assault Ryohei. "Are you insulting juudaime?!"

"Sandwich...?" Ryohei muttered, confused.

Crossing my arms, I made a face. "When I say 'fuck', people complain. When I say 'pineapple', people still complain."

"It's not so much the word, it's the context," Dino suggested unhelpfully. "Pineapples have nothing to do with the 'f' word. And sandwiches have no relation to this conversation whatsoever."

I deadpanned him. "Really? Come on! The 'f' word starts with 'f'. 'Fruit' starts with 'f'. Pineapple is a fruit. Therefore they are connected. Make sense?"

His facial expression was just screaming 'no'. But he nodded, nonetheless.

"...What does sandwich stand for?"

"Shouldn't you people be training?" I accused irritably, extremely eager to switch topics. "You've only got six days left. Time is priceless."

"We're having trouble," Tsuna admitted. "You see - "

"I don't see," I interrupted. "You have a clue to your box weapon from Kyoko, don't you?"

Tsuna's mouth formed an 'o'. Turning to Gokudera, I studied his defiant stare. "Tell you what; I'll deal with Lambo, so spar with Ryohei for today. Alright, goodbye, you can all go now."

They ran off, and I slumped in the chair, cursing under my breath. _  
><em>

"Serena, are you all right?" Dino asked, placing a hand on my shoulder. Faceplanting the table, I yawned.

"Byakuran is so lame. He can't even make an assassination squad without violating some form of copyright."

* * *

><p><em>Soon after that...<em>

As Dino bolted up the ridiculously long staircase to Namimori Shrine, he wondered if Serena was actually still there. Kyoya had been more...enthusiastic than usual, rampaging until sunrise. _She's going to be so pissed... _

And there she was, at the top of the staircase, legs crossed, eyes shut. "Inner peace..."

"Serena..." he huffed. "I'm so sorry I'm late. Were you here for long?"

She peeked open an eye. "Pfft, I've only been here for a couple of - " Dino breathed in relief. " – hours." The relief disappeared faster than it came, but she waved it off. "Chill. Meditate with me."

Now, Dino had known Serena since she was three. And he knew without a doubt that before Serena would willingly meditate – hell would have to freeze over. "Who are you, and what have you done with Serena di Squalo?" he grinned jokingly, taking a seat beside her. "No eye patch?"

"Oh, I stared at the sun a while back. Terry gave me the O.K. this morning, so I don't need it anymore."

He couldn't contain his confusion. _Screw that._ "How was your trip? You've been quite vauge about it."

"Our plane was hit by a missile," she stated bluntly, twirling her hair with her finger. It was a lot longer than Serena would've normally tolerated. What was the occasion? "We got lucky and ended up on a fishing trawler. When we got to Namimori, Byakuran's assassination squad ambushed us."

"You just turned an extremely dramatic journey into a virtually impossible plot," he decided quietly.

"That's life in a nutshell." She paused, and brought her knees up to her chest. "So what exactly did you want to talk to me about?"

"Byakuran wants you dead."

"A lot of people want me dead. At some point, I stopped caring."

Dino forced himself to say the next few words. "Serena, please, trust me. I don't want to see you get hurt. Don't go to the Choice match. Nothing good will come from it."

"Say, if you found out you had AIDS, what would you do?"

It was a random question, but Dino pretended not to care. "They found the cure for AIDS."

"Huh? What about incurable cancers?"

"They're just cancers now."

Scowling, she rephrased her question. "You have a new, deadly, incurable disease, which could kill you at any given time. What should you do? Live normally? Finish a bucket list?"

Before Dino could come up with a deep, meaningful answer, a ringtone blared out. _Insanity, why are you my clarity?_

As Serena picked up, Dino had time to glimpse 'unknown caller'. After a few seconds of the straightest face Dino had ever seen her pull off, she turned and gave him an apologetic look. "Sorry, I gotta take this call."

Alarm bells went off one after the other in Dino's mind. Unknown caller. Straight face. Requested privacy. No explanation. But he caught himself from prying, and stood up, and handed her his coat. "Don't catch a cold."

"It's okay. Idiots don't catch colds."

* * *

><p><em>"I liked the eye patch, Serena-chan. Please remove the Cavallone family Boss."<em>

My blood felt like it'd just come in contact liquid nitrogen, but for Dino's sake, I kept a straight face.

"_Do I have your attention?"_

"Sorry, I gotta take this call," I apologized to Dino, and he understood my prompt, handing me his coat as he left. But the extra warmth wasn't enough to give me consolation.

"Don't catch a cold," he warned.

"It's okay. Idiots don't catch colds."

"_Do I have your attention?" _the so called 'unknown' caller repeated patiently. Of course I knew him. There were only so many people who called me 'Serena-chan' so casually.

When I was sure Dino was out of earshot, I cleared my throat. My voice was curt – after all, I had no idea how he got _my number_, how he could _see me_, and why the fuck he was _calling me_. Or in other words – he was a stalker of some sort. "You have my attention, Byakuran."

"_As you know, I requested a Choice battle in a few days time. And I did say that I wouldn't attack the Vongola in the meantime."_ There was a pause, and I could imagine Byakuran jovially squishing a marshmallow. _"But as Xanxus-kun never seems to forget, the Varia is independent."_

My frozen blood boiled. Well, my monthly dose of blackmail was late, after all. "So?"

"_In five days time, I'll defeat Tsunayoshi and his group, but I'd prefer you not be there to ruin the effect. Or better yet, let me kill you, and I'll give you all a merciful death."_

"Aww, I was looking forward to it. What's my compensation?"

"_This is not a negotiation."_

...Wrong answer. "You can kill me, blackmail me, whatever; but I'll destroy the Vongola rings. You'll never finish your trinisette crap. I advise you to reconsider."

There was a pause. _"Let's negotiate."_

Swallowing, I made up my mind. "I can't guarantee whether I go to Choice or not. The moment my heart stops beating – Yuni will no longer belong to the Millefiore."

"_Hm, using my second in command as a bargaining chip,"_ Byakuran mused. _"Interesting. You're offering to kill yourself?"_

"Shit happens."

"_Ha ha! We have a deal. Any time you're ready, Serena-chan."_

He hung up without another word. I sat there for another hour, watched Namimori wake, and then went for a walk.

* * *

><p><em>The next morning...<em>

I had a dream that I'd had the ultimate morning – sleeping in, clean clothes, warm fuzzy feelings all round.

*Sighs*. But alas, it was a dream. At the climax of some nightmare involving a worm apocalypse, I woke before the sun rose and put on the most tattered clothes I'd ever seen (since it was Lussuria's handiwork, it may've been a fashion statement). I walked into a door for stress relief.

I was not relieved.

Kyoko and Haru were busy making uniforms for the Choice battle; so on top of my busy schedule, the duty of preparing meals fell upon me. Since Dino and Squalo would start training with Hibari and Yamamoto at the crack of dawn, I had to beat them to it.

Almost an hour later, I made my way to Namimori Middle. Let's just say the last time I was at school...things didn't really turn out that well. I didn't see Dino or Romario, but Hibari was on the roof. Asleep.

So I did the natural thing. I woke him up.

And so he did the natural thing. He took out his tonfas.

"Breakfast is served," I muttered holding up a bento. "Fighting during breakfast gives people indigestion and all, just saying."

"I'll bite you to death."

_...What the hell did I do?_ _Maybe he's looking forward to having indigestion?_ "I'm sure the answer to your rhetorical question is bacon, eggs, croissants, miso soup, juice and riceballs. So do you want to - "

His eye twitched. "Die."

I scratched my head. "You want to...die? Shoot, I didn't know you were the suicidal type. Would you prefer if I stood and watched, or if I cried melodramatically 'Kyoya, Kyoya, don't do it'?"

Judging from his expression, neither was his cup of juice. But before the discussion could progress, Dino burst into the scene. "Serena? What are you - "

"Hibari doesn't like bacon, eggs, croissants, miso soup, juice and riceballs," I muttered more to myself than anyone else, sidestepping several of his swings. "How was I supposed to know?"

Dino smiled wryly, and pulled me out of range. "Give it a rest Kyoya, it's not every day you get to eat a bento made by a girl."

I gave Dino a nasty look. _Don't put words in my mouth Dino._

"Hn. I don't want it."

"Fine, I'll eat your share."

Hibari snatched his bento. _Wow, Dino really has gotten better at communication with the guy._

* * *

><p>Chrome passed another level of Mammon's training regimen.<p>

Stifling a yawn, I watched, twiddling my thumbs. Bianchi and I-Pin usually watched over Chrome in case of emergency, but Bianchi was doing therapy with Kyoko, and I-Pin was keeping Haru company.

I sighed. I couldn't even _see _illusions.

"Ku fu fu fu..."

_Ah, it's certainly been a while, hasn't it? _"Well well well, if it isn't my favorite villain. Go away, I need to watch Chrome."

"That's fine. I'll watch with you." Mukuro materialized, and took a seat beside me. Instead of the older guy I'd usually be stuck talking to, the ten years younger Mukuro about my age was sitting beside me. A bulletproof, soundproof sheet of one-way glass separated us from Chrome, so I wasn't too worried about distracting her.

_This can't be an illusion, right? _

He seemed to understand my confusion. "Don't worry assassin, it's not an illusion. I have access to your brain; I'm altering what you see. It's more like a brain hack."

_Isn't that slightly more concerning? _Remembering something, I lurched forward and swung a punch at Mukuro. It went right through him, and I punched a wall. "FUCK. OW. YOU PINEAPPLING PINEAPPLE."

"Ku fu fu fu...you seem to have lost quite a few brain cells," he snickered.

"SHUT YOUR PIE HOLE. I ALMOST WENT PERMANENTLY BLIND, YOU LITTLE DIPSHIT."

He pretended I wasn't there, and watched Chrome use mist flames. "Oh, good job assisting during my bout with Byakuran, by the way. Much appreciated."

"That's it?"

"What's it?"

"There's no 'thank you for saving my life' or 'I'm eternally indebted to you', or 'piss off'?"

"...Piss off."

Taking a deep breath, I tried to calm down. "Anyways, what do you want, Mukuro? You already know the escape plan, and Ken, Chikusa, M.M and Fran are already in place."

"I wanted to go over it once more, for accuracy." Nodding, I listened to his recital (actually, I was imagining a game of minesweeper). "And finally, when I'm out, I fly to Japan to assist the Vongola."

"Perfect."

"However, what makes you think I'll assist the Vongola?"

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Dude, I'm busting you out of the world's tightest prison. Equivalent exchange. And if you're going for world domination, it ain't gonna be easy with Byakuran having such a huge head start. No offence, but if you don't help the Vongola, we're all fucked. So if you help the Vongola, it's a win-win situation."

"Ku fu fu fu...in case you've been forgetting, I've been in – as you put so nicely – a pickle jar, for a decade. I'm no use in a fight."

"Use illusions to trick yourself."

He shrugged, shooting me an annoyed glance. "Easier said than done."

"If you're half the genius you say you are, I'm sure you'll manage."

It wasn't the happiest conversation in the world; but neither of us held any hostile feelings. "Hey Mukuro, if you believe in being reborn so much, do you write 'be right back' on your gravestones?"

"Serena di Squalo," he mused, "you have been my most annoying tool by far."

"Yeah, well, in my dictionary, annoying can be a synonym for entertaining."

Mukuro extended his hand. "Until we meet again, in the next world."

"Until then," I agreed, shaking his hand. It was sad to watch him leave.

* * *

><p><em>Many days later...<em>

I trained, helped others' training, kept Haru and Kyoko company and out of the dark about the crime world, disciplined Lambo (it was humane, I swear), and worked on a battle strategy with the four technicians – Terry, Shoichi, Giannini and Spanner. Or to put it simply: I did jackshit.

The day everyone had been waiting for arrived. As usual, I was first up. Scratch that. I had another sleepless night. In the critical last few hours before the Choice battle was scheduled to begin, I picked off the petals of a crateful of daisies, chanting to myself. _Should I go? Shan't I go? Should I go? Shan't I go? _By sunrise, I'd lost track from sleep deprivation, and deemed my reasoning invalid.

Staying up the whole night, wasn't smart; but I didn't see the harm in it. I knew exactly what was going to happen at Choice, down to the last detail. In fact, I'd spent hours reciting the facts and points I knew, over and over – I had nothing to do with it. At all. During the whole Varia vs. Tsuna battle, I'd been careless and made too many plotholes.

_This _time, I was absolutely sure nothing could possibly go wrong. But that wasn't all. I still needed mental preparation. Yuni had to be at the Choice battle. Hopefully, Byakuran would honor his word.

Lost in my own thoughts, I didn't notice the knock on my door.

"Serena, are you up?" Bianchi slid open the door before I had the chance to reply 'no'. "I've got some clothes for you here," she smiled, holding up some wardrobe disaster. Well, for my personal taste, that is.

After what seemed like a lifetime, I managed to speak. Speak wasn't even the right word – croak was more like it. "A skirt."

"Yes."

"You're expecting me...to wear a _skirt_."

"You're a girl. Duh."

"But you're wearing pants."

"I felt like it."

Well, arguing with Bianchi wasn't going to get me anywhere. "I hate maroon."

"I know."

That didn't necessarily mean I didn't like trying. "Do I have to - "

"Absolutely." She placed the clothes hanger my bed, and left with a wink. "By the way, Reborn wants to see you after you've changed."

_...What kind of a cruel joke is this?!_

But of course, Reborn wasn't interested in my ridiculous attire (he smirked nonetheless) – Terry was there as well, donned in, well...maroon. "Ciaossu Serena. Glad you could join us." And as usual, he wasted no time getting straight to the point. "I need you to take me to the base unit outside the shrine."

_Ah, so he wants to be there in first person. Great. _ "Get someone else to do it," I complained, leaning on the wall. "Terry, you look awfully young and healthy. Why don't you assist Reborn?"

"I need to control a hologram to fool the others," she shrugged with a yawn, "so you're doing it."

Frowning, I crossed my arms. "Remind me why you're asking us, not anyone else you know...better?"

"You two won't make a big deal out of it."

"...Oh, the ginormous size of this deal! Its...its...overwhelming!" I gasped, choking on air. Both Terry and Reborn shot me a deadpan look, and I sighed in response. "Fine. Whatever, I'll do it. Is there some anti-trinisette device?"

"Here." Terry tossed me a solid, but light backpack. She was reading a text. "Take the route through Foundation, it's faster that way. And there are some things I designed for you inside the base unit, if you're bothered."

As Reborn stepped into the backpack, the top shut automatically, and I slid the device onto my back. "Uh huh. See you later then."

"Later."

Something caught my eye. The text was from Shoichi – and at the very end: **i [less than sign] 3 u**

"Hey, what does that mean?" I asked quickly, pointing.

Terry raised an eyebrow. "Dude, what rock have you been living under? That's 'I love you'. See? Love heart?"

The dots connected. Literally. _I...I see it. _All I could hear was the cacophony of my heartbeat. Time stopped. _B-Bel...that was a joke...wasn't it? _I recalled his sullen expressions. _So when he said __'she' died...he meant me?! _"Terry, I-I...I need t-to - "

Reborn poked his head out of the bag. "Serena, whatever it is, it can wait."

My momentary stupor shattered. "O-Of...yeah...right." _It doesn't matter. After today, I don't have any more worries._

* * *

><p>When we arrived at the base unit, I found a pair of boots and a note with Terry's neat writing.<p>

**Why walk when you can fly? Compatible with all flames, won't be detected by any flame radar. Terry-chan is awesome, I know ~ :3 **

"Hm. She could've just issued all of us with a pair," Reborn muttered, peeking over my shoulder.

"It's a beta test. It sounds great and all, but there are probably a shitload of flaws that she's hoping to discover if I wear these." Placing the boots in a corner of the base unit, I heard voices (outside my head for a change). "That's Gokudera. Shoot, they're here."

Reborn stared. "By the way Serena, aren't you forgetting something?"

"What?"

"A week ago, Byakuran wanted you dead. Badly. He hasn't tried to kill you since – why?"

_Damn. Reborn's sharp. _"I made an offer I couldn't refuse. I'm going to take a nap; wake me up when Byakuran gets here."

* * *

><p>"The battlefield is lightning. Let's go then."<p>

_Byakuran...! _My eyes snapped open, and light blinded me. _This feeling...teleportation._

When the light finally died away, I painfully dropped into a chair. Reborn was barely shaken, and Squalo was standing as if nothing had happened. _That's right; Squalo came in during the warp..._

"Reborn. You didn't wake me up," I hissed.

He smirked back. "You didn't say please."

"For crying out - "

"I'm joking. You were in a pretty deep sleep."

Squalo interrupted our conversation loudly. "SHHHHHHH." Seeing as my hearing was never brilliant, I couldn't make out more than the occasional word from outside the base unit. Squalo and Reborn were both in deep concentration, and it seemed cruel to ask for an update every few seconds.

I was about to doze off again, when they left. Briefly, as they opened the door, I was able to catch a few sentences. "So, who will your representatives be, Tsunayoshi? One rain, one sky, two storms and a null."

Hang on. That wasn't right.

_Two storm? One null? Damn, it messed up! It should be one storm, two null, I swear! If there's two...that means either Bianchi or Terry's going to have to participate. But...but..._

Angrily, I slapped myself. As much as I respected them, this type of thing was my forte; not theirs. Stepping outside the base, surprise sprang from both sides.

Sweeping a quick look, I summarized the situation. The metropolis setting was as I expected. Byakuran's surprise had turned into irritation. Bianchi and Terry were in a cat fight about who should go. Even the Cervello judges by the side looked slightly at unease. It was like I'd come back from the dead (again) or something.

"All right, this is bloody ridiculous. I'll go. I volunteer as tribute. Is that fine with you, Shoichi?"

Gokudera clenched his fist at me. "Oi, you should be asking Juudaime!"

"Are you kidding?" Terry argued, grabbing the front of my shirt. "You didn't even sleep last night! If it comes to a fight of endurance, you're dead-weight!"

I shook my head. "You rely on the element of surprise - this battle ain't gonna have any. It'd be over before it even began."

"But you don't even have confidence," Bianchi cut in sharply. "I have more experience than you."

"Overconfidence is a flaw," I muttered. Talk about being a hypocrite. "Being humble leaves room for error. Shoichi. Tsuna. It's your call."

"Then our line-up is settled..." Shoichi muttered after a short exchange with Tsuna. "Sky will be Tsunayoshi-kun, storm will be Gokudera-kun and Serena, rain will be Yamamoto-kun, and I'll represent the null element."

Tsuna nodded.

I should have been ecstatic. Should've, being the key point. "Duty comes first," I reassured myself softly. _And the line-up for the Millefiore is: Kikyo, Daisy, Torikabuto and Genkishi. Just brilliant._

There were small complaints, and as Reborn dealt with them, Dino pulled me aside. "Are you crazy?!"

Rubbing my temples, I avoided his eyes. "Yes. Borderline psychotic, to be exact."

"This isn't funny!"

"Dino, I'm not a little kid. This game Byakuran's playing - it's all about choices. And I've made mine. So do me a favor," I glanced at Kyoko and Haru, "if things get too graphic, keep the girls out of it." He nodded grimly in response.

"Serena-chan, are you paying attention?" I spun around just in time to see the roulette thing Byakuran was holding squirt something at me. A target seemed to be glued onto my shirt. Byakuran smiled cheerily, and explained the target marker rules – his mouth moved, but my brain didn't comprehend any sound.

"Tea, butterscotch, parfait, subsidy. I like eating marshmallows. My car is an iPhone, not a Samsung."

Well, I never said I actually _could _lip-read. My eyes drooped, and Terry whacked me on the head to keep me awake. It did quite the opposite.

"To put it simply," Kikyo stated, "if we defeat Serena first, we win. If you defeat Daisy first, you win."

The marker started releasing flames, and immediately, I dropped involuntarily to my knees. _This...this takes up way too much energy. _Ignoring the frantic cries of concern, I got up on my own. Daisy only released sun flames - I was releasing seven times that. _Well, special can be negative too._

Squalo and I made eye contact, and we nodded in unison. _This is it. All or nothing._

Byakuran smiled darkly in our brief exchange. "Ready? Well then everyone, let's get this party started~!"

I sighed. _God damn it. _

* * *

><p><strong>A short, weird chapter. Excellent.<strong>

**There were a few of you who thought it was unusual for Squalo not to beat the crap out of Bel from the last chapter - my reasoning (as ridiculous as it is) is that he trusts Bel, since well - the guy really likes/loves/cares for the future Serena. Erm. Yup, it sounded loads better in my head =_=**

**R&R? Feedback leads to writing that you will more likely enjoy.**

**I've read this hundreds of times (there are still plenty of typos though) so it automatically makes sense to me. Any questions, requests or uncertainties - feel free to ask :D**


	33. Weight Of The Universe

Chapter 33 - Weight Of The Universe

**How many wives did King Henry VIII have? _**

Struggling to hold back a yawn, I wrote an answer with my eyes shut, and then promptly head-banged my desk.

Now, perhaps I owe an explanation. You know, something to clarify what exactly King Henry VIII has to do with a futuristic battle of Choice.

*drum roll*

...Absolutely nothing.

But apparently, he was the focus of my class. Yes, because despite everything, I'm back in Namimori Middle, in my time period (as in not ten years into the future with Byakuran). The Choice battle of the future...is history (oh look, they do have something in common).

...Yeah, that phrase makes logically/grammatically no sense at all. That's why I hate time travel; it fucks up future, present and past tense so badly.

As for why I'm in the present/past living the life of a mundane student...I have no idea. My memory was uncooperative. It was somewhat like guessing the contents of breakfast.

It was that exact moment, when it hit me.

I didn't have breakfast that morning.

And...other shiz.

*flashback*

_A day ago (in the future) during Choice…_

I sat in the Vongola base 'saving energy' (as Shoichi labeled it), rather content to do so. After all, there was just a little something about rainbow colored flames spurting out of a marker on my shirt that put me off my imaginary tea. Sitting in my fabulously lonely corner, I didn't even notice Tsuna, Gokudera and Yamamoto's flashy exit until Shoichi spoke.

"Serena, come here. I need a sample for some decoy flames."

Shoichi seemed to be doing four things at once, and I felt a twinge of guilt. _Bel...I...I... _I made up my mind on whim. Not the best way to do it; but time was being an asshole._ I'm not my future self. So please, for now, just get the fuck out my head; you're being perverted._ "You focus on guiding the others, I'll deal with the decoys," I decided, taking the seat beside Shoichi.

He shot a quick, concerned glance. "Don't overexert yourself."

"That's very sweet of you." _Don't worry; I've had terrible luck till this point. So nothing can possibly go wrong from this moment onward, right?_

And of course, that's when _everything _started to go wrong.

Shoichi seemed to understand the whole situation from a map with a bunch of moving dots on it; in boredom, I gave myself the task of scanning through an endless amount of live video footage available. It was seriously a pain to go through though. _Something's not right...but what?_

"Tsunayoshi, there's someone headed for you from around the corner," Shoichi interpreted, eyes glued to the map. I just so happened to be skimming through the group of cameras around Tsuna. "Contact in – "

"BEHIND YOU!" I shrieked. 'Shrieking' wasn't really my thing...but at least Tsuna reacted instantly to the panic in my voice, and entered Hyper Dying Will Mode, narrowly dodging a hail of sea snakes. _Torikabuto, was it?_

Beside me, Shoichi was in shock.

"_Yo, guys, is there someone headed in my direction?" _Yamamoto asked with a chuckle.

I shot Shoichi a look to shut up before he could utter a syllable. "Saru. From the left. Ten seconds."

"_Understood."_

Deep breath. _I am very calm. _A moment later, I was coughing and choking on air. _...M'kay, fuck that._ "That map. So the Millefiore sent us that?" The flowery insignia in the corner said it all.

"Choice is one game Byakuran wouldn't cheat in!" Shoichi argued defensively. "He wouldn't!"

"Is providing a map a rule of Choice?"

"Well...not officially," he replied hesitantly.

_Oh, well isn't that just brilliant? Byakuran just screwed us over, but at least he didn't cheat. Well that just warms my heart. _"Don't worry, the situation's not bad," I responded blankly, and I felt Shoichi cheer up a little. So I sort of ruined it by being myself. "It's just catastrophic."

Shoichi was struggling to keep his composure. "I didn't plan for something like this. What're we going to do?"

_You know, now that I think about it...Bel in the future – he's quite nice. I mean, he's not completely...annoying. The Bel in the past...he was like that too. _

"Um...Serena?"

Clapping my hands together, I got up from the chair, and changed into Terry's experimental shoes. "You're going to trust me," I muttered, covering the microphone, "because I'm thinking." Pulling my hand away, I straightened up and cleared my throat. "Gokudera, do you copy?"

"_I hear you."_

_Hearing isn't the same as copying; but I'll just assume you get me._ "Backtrack two intersections. Kikyo's headed for us. Stall him there."

"_Roger."_

"Say, Shoichi, how much do you hate motorbikes?"

In a split second, the color in his face drained away. "No. NO. We are not – "

* * *

><p><em>Over at the Millefiore viewing area...<em>

"Nuu," whined Bluebell. "Byakuran-sama, why is Yuni _here_?" Talk about being a party pooper. Dressed in her ridiculous attire, she was motionless, emotionless and…well, creepily staring at the back of Byakuran's head.

With a laugh, the aforementioned opened yet another packet or marshmallows. "Well, Serena-chan and I made a deal. Yuni-chan's going to be having a holiday with the Vongola for a while~."

"But Byakuran-sama – "

With the thought of Yuni in his mind, he twitched in annoyance. She was the key to the tri-ni-sette. How could he be such a fool to destroy her soul? So instead he put his faith in the Vongola brats to do something to fix her.

"Shhh," he interrupted grinning like a schoolgirl. "I don't want to miss anything. After all, Serena-chan's always a surprise, is she not?"

Pouting, Bluebell sulked. _Why is Byakuran so into martyrs?!_

* * *

><p>Shoichi hated impromptu plans. Serena's idea wasn't downright awful, but there was too much room for error. A whole mansion full, to be precise.<p>

They'd leave a decoy in the base unit and desert it before Kikyo arrived, keeping a convincing façade that they were still there by controlling the base wirelessly. With the assumption that they were retreating frantically in the base unit, Kikyo didn't bother going after other surrounding flame signals...the decoys, and the real Serena.

Thus the two of them were left free to go after Daisy.

"SERENA! WALL!"

Shoichi hung on for dear life as Serena swerved the motorbike a hard left, drifted and stuck out her foot to push off the wall. "S-Sorry!" He could hear the pain in her voice.

"You okay?" he asked, concerned, as they gathered speed once more.

"CAKE?" she yelled over the wind. "No, I'm not really a cake fan!"

*Mentally facepalms*

Motorbikes...weren't dangerous. Shoichi had designed a couple himself. But _Serena _and a motorcycle...now that was a completely different matter. For starters, she was barely concentrating.

It was another nerve racking minute before Serena came to a stop and took out a sniper scope. "I...can see Daisy. Is that a barrier up there?"

She passed the scope behind her shoulder so he could get a look. "Ah...yeah. It works by using *numerous science terms that most people live and die without knowing* – "

"Which means trouble," she simplified with a sigh, cutting him short. "How do we bypass it?"

"An object with no flames could go straight through. But anything with flames – a living organism or weapon covered in flames for example, would be repelled." She nodded and got off the bike, and begun walking. "Serena, no." He got off the bike caught up before she could get away. "That marker forces flames from your body; if you use excess stamina, your organs go into overdrive, and – "

"I die," she stated, being as blunt as ever. "This isn't news to me."

The panic in his own voice was on a level he hadn't heard yet. It was like a D sharp, or maybe an E – higher than his pre-puberty voice. "If you die, the world will end!"

Unfortunately, Gokudera's voice interrupted their discussion. _"I'm sorry, Kikyo caught up to the base." _

Serena nodded, showing no emotion other than slight disappointment. "Vongola, bad news. Kikyo's gonna cut communications any second now. Get to the Millefiore's target – "

As if on cue, all sounds from the earpiece were reduced to static.

*silence...*

"Do you think they got the message?" Shoichi tried to ask helpfully.

Cursing under her breath, she searched for something to kick. But the street was absolutely spotless. "I can't wait till the others get here."

He raised an eyebrow. "Well, you sound awfully trusting and optimistic. Or were you being sarcastic?"

"No no, I mean...when they finally reach us, I'll be out of stamina." Stiffly, she looked up towards where Daisy was sitting. "Kikyo's probably coming after me as we speak." For the thirteenth time that day (he was actually counting) Serena bent down to tie her long neglected shoelaces.

_Um...I'm not even gonna ask why._

She noticed his expression. "If I'm gonna die, it's not gonna be from an untied shoelace. That's just too lame."

"Serena...I see Kikyo!" Shoichi observed, jabbing his finger at the sky. "We have to run!"

Forcing down a grimace, I straightened up and tore my eyes away from Terry's shoes. I knew there was nothing but doom awaiting me from the moment I put 'em on, but she had a good appreciation for quality leather. "You run that-a-way," I muttered, pointing the way we'd come from, and then I faced Kikyo's direction. "I'm going this way."

He was against it, but I gave him a friendly shove to start him on his way. "Seriously? You're going via legs?"

"What, am I meant to go via arms?"

"The _bike._"

"But – "

I didn't have time to argue. Gathering my flames to the shoes, I predicted a slow steady ascent. Of course, my expectations were anything but great.

* * *

><p><em>Over at the Vongola viewing area...<em>

"I think," Terry started hesitantly, watching Serena catapult into the sky, "I went overboard with the energy conversion."

"You _think_?!" Squalo yelled. "Didn't you fucking test this shit out?!"

"Well yes. I'm testing it now. But I'm sure the test data was accurate..."

Grabbing the front of Terry's shirt, he temporarily turned off all safety barriers. After all, if Xanxus saw him, he'd be a pile of ashes. "You motherfu - "

"Squalo. Shut up and pay attention." Reborn's tone alone was enough to convey the message.

On another screen, Genkishi appeared to be dying, but to be honest: no one but Yamamoto gave a crap.

* * *

><p>I'll admit, I panicked. Just a little.<p>

You know, screaming 'AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH' like a headless chicken and all. Hang on. Headless chickens can't scream. ...Chickens can't scream.

But back to the point. Literally...one second, I was at ground level. The next...I'd shot past Kikyo with inches to spare. He looked as surprised as I was (if not more). Milliseconds before we passed, my mind had been set on one fact: how safe and beautiful Kikyo's shoes were. Waiting for the sublime moment, I reached out with both arms and forcefully tore the shoes from his feet. It was no easy task; he was one of those people who actually tied shoelaces _properly_.

Preferring not to use Terry's contraption again, I let myself freefall, using that time to change shoes. As soon as I was done, my flames kicked in, but I was a fraction too late to stop all the momentum. At least the impact had been significantly reduced, much unlike Kikyo. He straight went down like a chicken._ You know what? I think my luck finally began. _

I was sorely mistaken. All too literally.

Pain came as nasty afterthought. I felt I'd just bruised every bone in my body, though I was relatively certain that only a good number actually were (if only there was a difference in pain...). A purple projectile missed me by an inch. _Kikyo! The fucker's still alive? HOW?! He just fell like a thousand feet! _

Whatever these Funeral Wreaths were made of...it sure wasn't flowers.

Barely dodging another, I flew upwards, until I was level with the storey Daisy was on. Fortunately, I'd brought a handgun to a knife fight. No flames were required, so logically, the bullet would pass straight through the barrier. It wasn't until I tried to point the gun at Daisy, when I realized...my vision was hazy.

Squinting irritably, I shook my head desperately. _Shoichi said my organs would fail...I didn't think my eyes would be first. _Oh well. If I aimed for the chest, it'd probably hit something important.

"Itai! Let go!"

If Byakuran had chosen any other city; I wouldn't have heard it. But this metropolis...was silent. Deathly silent (not that there was never any life to begin with). "...Shoichi?"

"Serena di Squalo," a voice announced. There was only one person it could be. _FUCK YOU BYAKURAN. YOU AND YOUR FUCKING UNDEAD FLOWERS. THEY'RE MADE FROM PLASTIC, AREN'T THEY?! _"You wouldn't want your dear, dear friend to die here, would you?" _KIKYO, DON'T YOU DARE THINK I'LL FEEL ALL SAPPY BECAUSE YOU USED 'DEAR' TWICE TO DESCRIBE SHOICHI._

The Funeral Wreaths weren't nearly as nice as their name. I imagined them to be thoughtful tributes of flowers or something (or people that visited funerals just for the kicks) – not psychiatric hospital escapees who enjoyed causing funerals.

"Serena! Forget about me!"

I ground my teeth together, tensing to still my hand. _I seriously can't believe I made this game with Byakuran. IT. IS. FUCKING. STUPID. _"The end justifies the means. The end justifies the means," I repeated firmly, but my finger...wouldn't pull the fricking trigger.

Taking a deep breath, I tried to run through my options.

I could see that there would be no help from Tsuna, Gokudera or Yamamoto. Why? They were all under the same illusion. Torikabuto was definitely more formidable than I imagined.

I was relatively sure I could wipe out Daisy's marker with a few shots. And then we'd actually win Choice. But in that case, Shoichi would be a dead man walking...right beside Daisy. And unfortunately, with my failing eyesight, I couldn't pinpoint where Shoichi was. An inch could mean the difference between a head shot for Shoichi rather than Kikyo.

Then again, there was another option. The original reason I'd brought along the gun...was to commit suicide. Remembering that thought, I put the tip of the gun to the side of my head. Either way, we were supposed to lose, weren't we? No one else needed to die.

"Oh ho? What a bizarre choice."

We were meant to lose, true, but could I guarantee Byakuran would be true to his word? Funny, how the thought never occurred to me before he proved how much of a jackass he was in Choice.

_Argh! _My heart throbbed angrily, and I clawed at my chest with my free hand. _A heart attack? Now?! _

It was time to make a choice.

_Dear God. Buddha. Hitler. Whoever. I need some luck; it's about fucking time you gave some back. _Without hesitation, I pointed the gun vaguely at Kikyo and Shoichi and fired. BANG. I used the momentum from the recoil to change the line of fire to Daisy. I emptied the clip.

The two Cervello chicks swarmed to Daisy like hawks. On second thoughts, they were more like vultures.

With no longer a purpose, I let the gun fall. A moment later, I followed.

* * *

><p>It's not really daunting to view your body from outside your body...but I'll admit: it's sooooo awkward. Especially CPR. Cough.<p>

"I always figured you'd die with more dignity, considering how important that was to you." Alexandra Knight materialized beside me, hands in pockets, as we stared at my body and a bunch of people crying and stuff. Tsuna caught my body in time, so at least I wasn't a splat on the asphalt. And it was nice to see Shoichi was free of injury.

"This isn't a dream or a...a hallucination ...is it?" I muttered with a sliver of insecurity.

Shaking her head, she smiled. "Congratulations. You're dead."

An appropriate moment of silence passed between us. I felt like I had to say something to spoil it.

"Um...thanks. I think."

Alex snapped out of her momentary stupor. "I owe you a confession; but I only have a few minutes before your brain starts to die. Right now, Shoichi's explaining the parallel world thing – this is the only world, of all the worlds, that survived Byakuran's reign. And the reason's very simple."

She leaned in closer, for dramatic effect.

"You."

"..." _Yeah...I don't feel the drama._

"You know things people don't; you point them in the right direction. Do you even know how many times you've saved their amazing asses?" she exclaimed, pointing at the group around my corpse.

"..." _If I'm not mistaken, about...fifty seven altogether._

She sighed miserably at my lack of response. "There's only one of you at any one time in all the parallel universes. That's why you're the thorn in Byakuran's side; everything you do is a surprise. He finds you interesting, of course. But you'll never join him, so killing you is the next best thing."

"..." _Oh yes, that's totally logical._

"Moving on. Parallel worlds branch off, right?" she asked rhetorically. "So how is there only one of you? Simple. If you make the wrong choice at whatever time, you'd die, and that branch would fail and have a supreme dictator or something."

For some reason, none of Alex's information was clicking. My attention was snatched by the arrival of Byakuran and his crew, who started chatting casually to Tsuna's group. A select few were _still _doing CPR. So realization hit me like a bullet; sudden, with delayed pain. "But...I just died. So Byakuran's gonna take over this world?"

"I'm sorry, Serena."

_So that's why she always looks like she's at my funeral. Because in all parallel worlds; I actually...die. _"But if one Byakuran dies, then they're all dead, right?"

"W-Well…" Alexandra stammered uneasily, "that _is _the general idea. But my theory's a bit different to how the KHR 'plot' explains it. All worlds that have been screwed over are still screwed over after Yuni sacrifices herself and everything. But a new branch of parallel universes starts and the right ending will be among them."

_Then what was if all for?!_

She didn't notice my uncertainty. Actually, she probably did, but she wasn't showing it. "Well, good job. You made it this far. Your involvement in KHR, is officially over. YEAH BABY!"

_"Why? Why Serena?!" _Tsuna...was crying.

I started to mutter some belated reply. "I felt like I couldn't change my future. The life I was living...was that even a life? So why not just end it all?" It didn't matter that he couldn't hear me, _I _needed to hear it.

Confused, Alex rested a hand on my shoulder. "This isn't your job anymore. Leave it to another parallel universe."

Without realizing, I balled my fists. I remembered what I'd once said to Yamamoto: dying...was selfish. It was the easy way out – I hadn't considered the feelings of others (they were _still _crying). This world...my world...I couldn't just let it end, could I? For the first time, there was no voice in my head that said 'yes you can'.

"I need to go back."

"Huh?"

"You can do it, can't you?!" I snapped. Glancing at my watch, I saw that there was almost no time left.

She sighed, but pulled a tired smile, as if she'd expected this all along. "Of all the parallel worlds...this is the first time you've said that."

"Whoop di doo."

"But because you were actually meant to die, there's a catch if you go back now," she warned. "For one, you'll be completely on your own: we can't communicate." If she was hoping for a teary reaction, she would've been totally disappointed. Alone was a word that wasn't exactly new to me...which in turn wasn't any news to her.

"Next."

"Number two: since there can only be one of you in existence, the fate of the universe – no pressure – is on your shoulders and yours alone. You can't fail from this point forward. If you die, there's no parallel version of you to save the day."

I nodded. "What type of an assassin would I be if I couldn't even handle the universe?"

Alex raised an eyebrow at that. "Don't bite off more than you can chew. Finally, I don't know the ending of Tsuna's story. I don't know how successful the final battle of the Arcobaleno Arc was. You're going to have to end it. Happily, hopefully," she added as an afterthought.

"It's the journey that matters." _Though hypocritically, I thought 'the end justifies the means' was the most logical saying ever just a moment ago. _ "Is that it?"

"That's it."

We took a long hard stare at each other, before she cracked a grin. "Goodbye, Serena. Have faith in yourself. And tell Xanxus he's hot for me, m'kay?"

I couldn't help but smile back. That was the last time I ever saw Alexandra Knight.

*end flashback*

A sigh came from the teacher as he came up to my desk. "Knight-kun, you can't have '13%' wives."

"..."

"KNIGHT."

As my recollections were interrupted, my reflexes kicked in and I stood up, slamming my hands onto my desk loudly. A few people screamed. "Sir, I left my brain somewhere. I'm going to retrieve it."

"..."

As I left the classroom, I limped down the corridor, leaning heavily on the wall. Besides a little muscle pain, a bruise here and there – the only injury I'd come up with was a sprained ankle from when I was on the motorbike. With my flashback disturbed; random events came to mind each time I blinked.

Grabbing the nearest weapon-like object I saw and throwing it at Byakuran. (The weapon turned out to be shoe, and it didn't even make it halfway to Byakuran).

Squalo's fist rammed into my face. (I still had the bruise to prove it too).

"_Hell, what the fuck was that for?!"_

_Squalo harrumphed, crossed his arms and looked away. "Tch."_

Lambo was being annoying.

"_GYA! KYOKO! HARU! IT'S A ZOMBIE!"_

"_HIIIIIE! Lambo, don't open your box weapon!"_

Having a pleasant conversation with Byakuran.

"_That match was invalid!" I called out hoarsely. "Only God knows how many times you cheated."_

_Byakuran smiled sadistically. "I am God."_

"_Well you still cheated," I muttered irritably._

"_I did not."_

"_You did too."_

"_Did not."_

"_Did too."_

I'd argued how Byakuran made Tsuna choose the arena from a bunch of cards...that were probably all the same since… Um. What was it? Ah. The Millefiore only had one Flame Ring Teleportation System...and if the Vongola were using it to get to the Choice match...how was Byakuran and his team waiting, when the match's destination was supposed to be random?

The Vongola had to provide flames to get to the match (no small amount either) and the Millefiore obviously weren't subject to such treatment. Tiebreakers were not part of the rules either – the Cervello were also extremely biased.

And Byakuran's team just _happened _to have an undead subordinate chosen (yup, Daisy survived) as the target marker...whereas I (as the worst possible person to be chosen as the target) just _happened _to be selected.

Even my luck...wasn't that bad. I think.

DIIIIIIING DING DIIIING DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING.

I cringed as I covered my ears. I'd wandered too close to the school's bell signalling the beginning of lunch. As students streamed out form their classrooms, I fled to the Reception Room. Today was not a good day for human interaction.

As an assassin, attention was something that I wanted to avoid. It was slightly difficult to do that, when the rumor that I'd sworn at a group of parents and blown up the infirmary had spread throughout every crack in the school. I swear, even the cockroaches were staring. Or maybe it was the fact that once again, I was wearing the guys' uniform (it covered the bandages better). At least Hibari didn't look twice when we crossed paths.

As I entered, I heard a smirk. "Coffee?"

_Reborn...was he expecting me? _"...Thanks."

"You've been having a fun morning," he observed, holding out a cup. "Amnesia? Headache?"

I sighed and accepted it. "I'm _that_ easy to read?"

"A baby could do it."

Even I had to crack a grin at that. "Why did we leave the future? How long was I out for? What happened at Choice? Did we lose? How's Tsuna doing? No no, wait, what about - "

Before I could react, Reborn flicked my forehead. A Reborn flick to the forehead...is equivalent to a hammer. You know, like his one ton one. "Calm down Serena. Choice ended in a draw. Byakuran handed over Yuni initially, but wanted her back after you were revived."

"I specifically said that Yuni wouldn't belong to the Millefiore if - "

" - your heart stopped beating," he finished smoothly. "Then technically, even in the case of a miracle and your heart started again, Yuni would still be free. So I heard. But Byakuran was prepared to take her back as a prisoner."

"That bloody git," I cursed angrily, relieved that Reborn wasn't questioning the scientific complications of a 'miracle'. "How did we get away?"

"We used the same machine that took us to the battlefield. Do you like your good or bad news first?"

"...News is news, Reborn."

"I'll start with the good news then." He put down his coffee and crossed his legs. "The Funeral Wreaths followed us back to Namimori. We managed to lose them by going into the hideout, but eventually, they will find us."

_And kill us_, I finished mentally. _How is that good news?! _

"Let me finish before you judge," he chided. "Shoichi had an idea to buy more time to prepare. He sent everyone who came from the past and Yuni _back _to the past. Of course, we have a time limit to go back. But for the ten minutes we're gone there, we can spend a week here to recuperate, and get stronger."

"Alright. Then what's the bad news?"

"Yuni had an idea to strengthen the Vongola rings. We have less than a week to clear trials set by the will of the First Generation Vongola family. If we pass...the Vongola rings will be at their full potential."

I frowned. "Reborn, that's good news."

"You're not the one taking a trial."

"Fair point."

"You arrived last night – a day after the rest of us," he continued. "You stayed in the future for a minute or so longer...important phone calls." He patiently waited for an explanation. I badly feigned memory loss. "And coincidentally, as you returned to Namimori Shrine...Yamamoto underwent his trial."

"He passed then?"

"He failed."

Reborn looked down, so the edge of his fedora hat covered his eyes, giving him that mysterious aura that creeped people out. "You figured out the basic situation. So you pleaded the First Generation Rain Guardian to give Yamamoto another chance. His second trial is tonight."

Nodding slowly, my brain worked overtime. "I don't recall anything before sitting down at my desk..." I trailed off, hoping he'd elaborate. The school uniform I was wearing...wasn't mine.

He cleared his throat. "Well, I suppose you have some sort of an autopilot function. Anyway, since you technically 'died', some medical treatment was required. But we couldn't take you at a hospital."

"Why?"

"It's only been a week or so since the ring battles ended. The Ninth has summoned you back to Italy. Dead or alive."

"T-Then I gotta go to Italy!" I panicked, getting unsteadily to my feet. "There's always a flight at midday...I can – "

"No." I was slightly taken aback from Reborn's sudden defiance. "If Shoichi's right, and you're the reason Byakuran hasn't taken over our world, then it's critical you stay with the Tenth Generation. I'll explain the situation to the Ninth in good time – but we can't risk a butterfly effect. So until then, you're off grid." His tone made it clear, that there would be no discussion.

My hands were shaking. From shock or anger...I couldn't judge. "Who am I staying with then?"

"Hibari."

_H-Hibari?! NO. He didn't mind the uniform...because OWNS...oh my God. _I was seriously tempted to strip.

Reborn answered before I could even ask. "Hibari's house is as off-grid as you can get. And he can protect you."

"I don't need _protection_," I hissed indignantly. _My...my dignity. It's gone. There's not even 0.00000001% of it left. _

"Considering you died from exhaustion less than a day ago, it may be time to rely on others."

_But...but...this is my problem. MINE. _

Reborn placed a cell phone and my walking stick on the coffee table. "Your problem is our problem. That's how a family rolls." Standing up to leave, his eyes bore into my skull. "I do have one question for you though."

Nervously, I held my breath.

"How's your coffee?"

"...Cool."

He smirked. "That's good to hear."

"But I don't like iced coffee..."

* * *

><p>When school ended that afternoon, I wanted to get away as soon as possible. Pushing through the crowd (well, it actually parted like the Red Sea), I staggered outside the school gates headed for...nowhere. <em>Hell; great speech Reborn, but I'm still not going to Hibari's house. Can't go to my house either...or check in at a hotel…<em>

And just to top things off, it was raining.

Just as I turned into an empty street, my cell phone rang. A bit too coincidental, if you ask me_. _With clenched teeth, I answered. It was a Nokia. It'd survive the rain.

_Maybe it's not them. Maybe it's just chance._

"_Serena._"

..._Nobody's own name should sound like a gunshot._ I struggled to keep my voice level. "Iemitsu."

"_It's nice to see you've come out of your coma. So w__ould you like to explain why you're not responding to the Ninth's summons?_" There was no warmth in his voice.

"I...I…" My voice choked, and I found myself speechless. Ignoring the Ninth's summons was treason. And without a doubt, I wouldn't be the only one punished for it.

"_I'm waiting._"

"Give me some time," I asked flatly. "I'll be there in a week."

"_I'm not giving you a choice._"

"I've done everything you and the fucking Ninth have told me to do," I tried to reason, exasperated. Pausing to take a rattled breath, I struggled to keep my tone civil. "One week. That is _all _I am asking!"

"_...You have until the end of today to leave Japan."_

And with that, he hung up. Seconds passed, as I stood there frozen. Realizing the full mess, I yelled in frustration. "AAARRGGGHH. FUCK THE WORLD. YOU BITCHES AIN'T GOT NOTHING ON ME."

"Um...Serena...are you all right?"

My heart skipped a beat. "Yamamoto! I uh...ignore that...rant. I'm fine."

"...Ha ha, are you sure?"

I got to my feet. "See? Absolutely perfect. Aha ha ha…"

"Hey, you're soaked," he noticed, moving the umbrella so it was covering both of us. "Whereabouts are you going?"

"Uh…" _Wait. Does it really matter?_

"You can crash at my place for a while," Yamamoto decided, seeing my indecision.

"A-Ah...if you don't mind."

We started walking at a slow pace, and after a few minutes in silence, we chose the same moment to break it. "Serena – "

"Nice weather – " We both stopped talking simultaneously. "Uh. You can go first," I offered.

He sighed, and for the first time, I noticed how depressed and...and un-Yamamoto-like he was. "About Choice...I'm sorry. If I hadn't spent so long with Genkishi when he...went down, I wouldn't have gotten stuck in Torikabuto's illusion and...maybe you wouldn't have..." he trailed off miserably.

_Died?_ "Maybe." I stressed the word skeptically. "You did what you felt was right. And I'm fine."

"But I couldn't help my comrades!" he stormed. "Last night...I couldn't even pass Asari Ugetsu's trial. I'm useless."

It was painful (and believe me, I know what I'm talking about) to see Yamamoto beat himself up like this. Tsuna and Gokudera usually needed someone to talk to...but until now, I'd never thought Yamamoto needed to as well. I wondered how ignorant I really was.

"Yamamoto," I started slowly, coming to terms with my memory, "during your match against Squalo in the ring battles...do you know why he saved you? Or rather, why he didn't let you die, at the end?"

"Squalo wanted to fight me again," he answered, taken by surprise. "So he'd have a worthy opponent in the future."

Shaking my head, I smiled. "No, Squalo was prepared to die. He saved you...because he respected you. Not as a strong swordsman, but as Yamamoto Takeshi."

He looked behind his shoulder, puzzled expression on his face. "I don't understand."

"When I a kid...well, more of a kid...I was innocent. I didn't believe in killing people – hurting yes, but killing no," I murmured, remembering thoughtfully. "If I didn't have to take a life, I wouldn't do it. Now...well, I have more exceptions. When you tried to save Squalo," I continued, getting back on track, "even at the risk of your own life, you reminded him of me. He realized the strength of your resolution, and accepted your 'weak' nature."

"So what does that have to do with my trial?"

"Nothing. But it has everything to do with your face."

"M-My face?" he laughed nervously. "How so?"

We arrived at his house, and he put me down gently. "Yamamoto, if you'd have fought Squalo...with that _face_, I seriously doubt Squalo would've saved you. That's not the Yamamoto Takeshi you, your friends or your family respect."

* * *

><p>I watched Yamamoto train for a couple of hours. Apparently, the Arcobaleno didn't turn up; so I figured I'd fill in. *sighs* We parted ways as he left for his trial. "You're not going to watch my match?" he asked, slightly disappointed.<p>

"I'm not going to wish you any luck either," I grinned mischievously.

"Eh? That's cruel..."

"You don't _need_ luck to win." I waved him goodbye and took a minute to watch him stroll happily towards Namimori Shrine.

I liked to think I have excellent time management. Juggling a job, school, and stalking does require the ability, after all. But standing on Tsuna's roof, counting down the seconds till midnight was not the best example.

I'd visited my residence, and retrieved a few weapons and a lightly packed backpack of necessities. Minutes before midnight, I jumped down onto Tsuna's verandah, and was about to leave when –

"S-Serena? What...!" Tsuna gawked, opening his window. _Shoot! I thought he was asleep!_

Dressed in all blacks...with an assortment of weapons...I could see he had his assumptions. But I couldn't bring myself to tell him his father was a bloody jackass. Things like that...tended to be better left unsaid. "I was taking...a nightly stroll."

"On the roof?"

"New perspective."

"Uh...huh." Tsuna knew I was lying. I knew he knew I was lying. But that didn't matter, so long as he didn't know the truth.

"So anyways," I yawned, "you should go to sleep. How was Yamamoto's trial, by the way?"

Tsuna's grin was soothing. "He passed. Lambo's is next."

"M'kay. Text me about how that goes. G'night." I gave a mock salute, and jumped off his verandah, landing in a roll. Immediately, I made for the shadows. There was little point; but it was probably better than walking around with a sign that said 'Hi Iemitsu, Ninth! Wassup my homies?'.

After all, it was midnight.

* * *

><p>People didn't just <em>knock<em> on Hibari Kyoya's front door. It was simply taboo. And suicide.

A mailman in training once had a delivery – emphasis on 'in training'. Actually, he never finished his training. It was hard to, with a broken spine and brain damage.

So it was extremely difficult to imagine who would dare to create such a racket at such a late hour. In fact, it was so late...that it was early. Hibari finally decided it wasn't worth the effort. It took all of his willpower, but he ignored the noise and went back to his book.

Silence. They must've given up.

Without warning, there was a knock on his _back door_. Somehow, in utter shock, Hibari had managed to tear his book in half. For a person who treated his books quite well, this was somewhat traumatic.

"Ah, he's probably upstairs..." he heard her voice mutter. _Herbivore... _All of a sudden, everything was crystal the creak of the pipes that ran along the side of his house, he gave an irritated sigh and took out his tonfas.

"Come in."

Instantly, the door opened and shut just as quickly. Instead of paying any attention (at all) to him, she crouched by the door, waiting tensely. Even with the distance between them, he saw the exhaustion and blood.

A helicopter hovered above his home, and immediately, her hand was around the hilt of the sword on her back. A few seconds passed, and the copter flew away. With a sigh of relief, she dropped her backpack, collapsed on the floor and blacked out.

Hibari's eye twitched.

The next time the baby asked for a favor – no. It didn't matter what he'd get in return. N-O.

* * *

><p>The next day, I magically ended up in bed. I say 'magically', because there's no way Hibari Kyoya...would...would...<p>

Actually, let's not think about that. It was already afternoon when I woke, so I figured there was no point in going to school or anything. And then events of the previous night sunk in. That's right – it was official. I was a fugitive of fugitives. And...I'd cowered to Hibari Kyoya's home.

At least this time, I was staying in a guest room...not his sister's room. Because that'd been a totally awkward experience.

My cell beeped.

**Tsuna:  
>S, Lambo's trial went without any problms :P<strong>

**Me:  
>Good job Baka-Tsuna (y). <strong>

**Tsuna:  
>Some ppl from the Vongola Family were askin about u 0_0<br>Does this have anything 2 do with last night? **

Tsuna didn't know? Was the Ninth trying to sugar coat things? "Damn, what's that excuse they always have...?"

**Me:  
>I forgot 2 pay my taxes :D<br>I'll do it after we defeat u no who.**

**Tsuna:  
>OK. Plz come 2 school 2mrrw. <strong>

**Me:  
>Maybe =_=<strong>

I checked some of the other texts I'd gotten. Glancing at the number, it took me a while to recall the number. _Ah, I haven't talked to this guy in ages._

**Ken:  
>oi bitch. is this ur no.?<strong>

**Me:  
>U mean the bitch who gives u cash?<strong>

Immediately, he texted back. He must've been waiting pretty intently for an answer...

**Ken:  
>chrome isn't back yet. where is she?<strong>

Chrome...was with...Daemon Spade. Ah. I'd forgotten. What to do though...?

**Me:  
>I dunno. Txt me if she gets back.<strong>

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

**Gokudera:  
>Oi.<strong>

**Gokudera:  
>U busy 2mrrw morning?<strong>

**Gokudera:  
>I'm training :P<strong>

With a sigh, I texted back.

**Me:  
>U could've fit that in 1 txt. I pay ur bill, rmbr? D:<strong>

**Gokudera:  
>Tch :P<strong>

**Gokudera:  
>So?<strong>

**Gokudera:  
>R u free?<strong>

I paused to think. Gokudera's trial was tomorrow, wasn't it? So far, the trials had been going more or less as they were expected to, so I had to replace Fon and distract him for a few hours. With the current situation though...that option didn't quite sound possible.

**Me:  
>Probs not. Gimme the details anyway.<strong>

Tossing the phone to one side, I stretched outwards in the bed. Just because I said I could handle the universe...didn't mean that it had to throw everything it had at me. The stress was literally killing me. All I wanted...was to tell someone, anyone, that I wasn't the traitor the Ninth had marked me out to be. I wasn't a blasé bitch.

_Shut up Serena. This isn't the time for self-pity. Focus on how you're going to help Gokudera._

As I looked up again, I sat up quickly in panic. _Is that...is that...it can't be! _Rubbing my eyes, I opened them and cringed. '_Tis not a hallucination. _The flickering Dying Will Flame on his forehead and unquestionable resemblance to Tsuna was creeping me out.

He came up to the end of the bed – surprisingly, he was shorter than I anticipated. Like Tsuna, his voluminous hair covered the fact. It was like he was really _there_, flesh and all. Was he waiting for me to say something?

"Vongola Primo. What brings you...here?"

His blank face gave nothing away about what his thoughts were. "Are you a friend or a foe of the Vongola?"

_Oh no. I think I know what this is about. _Shutting my eyes, I heaved a heavy sigh. "Well at the moment, that would be a matter of perspective."

* * *

><p><strong>OMAKE: Santa's Little 'Helper'<strong>

It was always boring when Serena was on a mission. The Varia Mansion was just too quiet. Bel lazily flicked through her file, hoping he could find some dirt or something. In the armchair opposite, Squalo was watching the evening news. "Oi Squalo."

"Hn?"

"This has to be a lie," Bel muttered, scanning the document with a frown. "It says dumbass' only failed one mission."

Squalo looked across the room with a raised eyebrow. "That's the truth, you brat. Why the fuck do you think she has more work than you?"

Insulted, Bel changed the topic away from him. "What the hell did she fail?"

"Look at the fucking report."

With a scowl, Bel found the file and begun reading. The date...that was barely after dumbass joined. At least that explained why he didn't know about it.

_MISSION: ID-10T_

_CLIENT: Vongola Ninth  
>CONTRACTOR: Serena di Squalo (aged 7)<br>DATE: 24-12-XX_

_MAIN OBJECTIVE:  
>~ Play Santa's little helper at the annual Vongola Christmas Party, and assist Santa in giving gifts and spreading holiday cheer.<em>

_ADDITIONAL OBJECTIVES:  
>~ Do not harm any persons<br>~ Do not be sidetracked  
>~ Service with a smile<em>

"~Ushi shi shi shi~... How the _fuck_ do you fail this?" Bel laughed, looking up. "She failed _this_?! You can't even hire the Varia for this shit!"

"Well apparently, you can."

_MISSION STATUS: FAILED_

_COMPLETED OBJECTIVES: 0/4_

_CLIENT'S REPORT:  
>Setting alight gifts and Santa's beard is not an acceptable form of spreading holiday 'cheer'. Neither is watering the Christmas tree with alcohol, corrupting young children into believing Santa Claus is a chocolate bar that has no soul, replacing carols with death metal, playing football with the turkey, strutting away from security whilst imitating the noises of a chicken, and insulting the footwear choices of all female guests present.<em>

"Wassup, I'm back." Serena yawned and entered the living room. She didn't have a _single_ scratch.

Both Bel and Squalo stared in awe. "How?"

"Oh. It was an easy mission. You know, just a quick assassination and a run-in with the military."

"..."

Grinning mischievously, Serena snatched the report from Bel's hands, skimming through. "Oh. I remember this." Handing it back, she made a face. "The Ninth is a dick. He's not being honest."

"Oh really? How so?"

"I totally had a smile on my face the whole time."

* * *

><p><strong>I DID IT. THREE MONTHS OF BELATED EFFORT IS COMPLETE.<strong>

**I thought I'd update this on Christmas Eve, just because...well, I happened to finish on Christmas Eve. Actually, it's technically Christmas in my time zone now so...eheh...**

**So yeah, this story's not over yet. Will I continue to the next arc? ...Maybe. School work does tend to pile up quite a bit...**

**Oh, LaughterGirl, Serena's ringtone in the last chapter was Clarity :D Good job, I didn't think anyone would pick up on it. I tend to use a lot of song references...which most people don't get...**

**And mmsbddvr, ERMAGERD I NEVER REALISED. A GENIUS, YOU ARE. Just to share - 'You do know the real reason Xanxus mom named him so? Because she couldn't name him his actual name without the x inserted'. Ha ha!**

**GeniusPineapple**** (I love the name, btw) - it doesn't just 'feel like' ages since I last updated...it has been ages. Sorry for being slow...aha...ha...**

**And I suppose I should advertise. I'm writing this other fic with Falcone Kaerva, called 'The Things I Hate About You'. HibariXOC :D**

**Um. Hopefully, any questions or uncertainties were covered in the chapter. If not...PM me, review, whatever floats your train (inside joke). Thanks for the continued support :D  
><strong>

**Have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, ciao~! :]**


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